ANCHORMAN
ACTION NEWS! WITH RON BURGUNDY
by
will Ferrell and Adam McKay
2/26/2003
RevisionsOPEN ON: BLACK SCREEN WITH FLASHING TV NEWS SHOWS ON A TV
SCREEN MOVING 'TOWARDS US
Dozens of news shows flash on the screen. ABC, NBC, CNN,
FOX, MSNEC, CBS, The Weather Channel, ESPN, etc. etc. All
fronted by dozens of anchors: Jennings, Brokaw, Aaron Brown,
Rather, Chung etc. etc.
NARRATOR (V.O.)
(powerful and assured)
Television news. There are hundreds
of 24 hours channels, local and
network news shows bombarding us
every waking second. And with each
show an endless list of news anchors
trying to convince you that they,
and only they, speak the truth. And
what do these voices of the truth
tell us? Be afraid. Be very afraid.
‘The shows multiply across the screen forming a cacophony of
anchors.
NARRATOR (CONT'D)
But there was a time in our not too
distant past when the world as we
know it was a much simpler place.
We dissolve to WISPY CLOUDS and a BLUE SKY.
NARRATOR (CONT'D)
‘This was a less cynical time. A time
when people believed everything they
heard on TV... a time before cable
Whree channels were all there was
and viewers were happy. You heard me
right, three channels
MUSIC: a sparkling gliss
We emerge from the clouds to find ourselves over Center City
Portland 1973.
MUSIC: the initial pulsing bass lines of "Cherry, Cherry" by
Neil Diamond
NARRATOR (CONT'D)
It was 1973 and in a city like
Portland the news was clear... and
if it wasn't you turned on the TV
and the man told you what it was.
(MORE)CONTINUED:
NARRATOR (CONT'D)
Yes, in this strange time, men were
men and real men were anchormen....and
in Portland one anchorman was the
balls: Ron Burgundy. And brother let
me tell you: he knew how to wear a
friggin’ suit.
MUSIC KICKS IN HARD. Smash cut to RON BURGUNDY, 38, walking
through the heart of Portland with a clear blue sky overhead.
He has a commanding presence with an affable smile and
perfectly parted hair. He's a cross between Chuck wWoolery
and Chuck's brother Sean Woolery. As he strolls down the
street all of Portland seems to embrace him.
‘TITLE: ACTION NEWS! WITH RON BURGUNDY
CONSTRUCTION WORKERS sitting on a girder wave to Ron.
CONSTRUCTION WORKER
Hey Ron Burgundy! You're the best!
RON
Looking good Portland!
Continuing his walk, he takes a hot dog offered to him by a
VENDER from a lunch truck.
‘VENDER,
Hey Ron Burgundy! Do a story on me!
RON
(chucLing)
You are a riot Louie!
Ron takes one bite of the hot dog and then drops it on the
ground without a thought. He then moves past an open air bar
and a BUSINESS MAN, 38, sans jacket hands him a scotch rocks.
BUSINESS MAN
Hey Ron! Bottoms up! We love ya!!
RON
Well hello, booze!
He downs the scotch in one sip and puts the empty on the
tray of a passing waitress. Next Ron passes an ATTRACTIVE
BLONDE woman bending over sipping from a water fountain. He
gives her butt a pinch
RON (CONT'D)
I like that fanny!
BLOND WOMAN
(playfully)
oh, Mr. Burgundy!