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    The Reformed Vampire Support Group
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    The Reformed Vampire Support Group
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    The Reformed Vampire Support Group
    Audiobook11 hours

    The Reformed Vampire Support Group

    Written by Catherine Jinks

    Narrated by Caroline Lee

    3.5/5

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    Currently unavailable

    Currently unavailable

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    About this audiobook

    YALSA Best Books for Young Adults: Top 10

    Contrary to popular opinion, vampires are not sexy, romantic, or powerful. In case you hadn't noticed, vampires are dead. And the only ones who don't get staked are the ones who avoid attacking people, admit they have a problem, and join a support group. Just ask Nina Harrison-fanged at fifteen, and still living with her mother. She hasn't aged since 1973, and the highlight of her sickly, couch-bound life is probably her Tuesday-night group meeting, which she spends with a miserable bunch of fellow sufferers, being lectured at.

    But then one of the group is mysteriously turned to ashes . . . and suddenly they're all under threat. That's when Nina decides to prove that every vampire on earth isn't a weak, pathetic loser. Along with her friend Dave-a former punk rocker who could be pretty cute, if he weren't such a vampire-she travels way out of her comfort zone to track down the killer. It could be that there is a lot more to being a vampire than Nina realized.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherPenguin Random House Audio
    Release dateMay 12, 2009
    ISBN9780739385296
    Author

    Catherine Jinks

    Catherine Jinks grew up in Papua New Guinea and now resides in New South Wales, Australia. She is a three-time winner of the Children's Book Council of Australia Book of the Year award and has received the Centenary Medal for her contribution to Australian children's literature. Her popular works for young readers include the Evil Genius series, The Reformed Vampire Support Group, and the trilogy that began with How to Catch a Bogle. Visit her website at www.catherinejinks.com.

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    Reviews for The Reformed Vampire Support Group

    3.5/5

    275 ratings45 reviews

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    Review must be at least 10 words

    • 4/5
      This book is very different than what most vampire books are based on. It involves a vampire support group for vampires that don't bite people instead they eat guinea pigs. This book involves the adventures of a vampire named Nina who goes to help find out who killed one of the members of the support group. It's a great book overall and is very different from your typical vampire books basically all the vampire myths are debunked. And not changed they just become silly lies. The characters are hilarious in some parts and just funny because there are vampires of all ages in the support group.
      Overall i liked the book though and would recommend it to anyone who likes reading vampire books.
    • 3/5
      Not as enjoyable as the Evil Genius series for me. A maudlin take on vampirism as a disease and a coming of age story arc. Enjoyed the Sydney references.
    • 4/5
      3Q3P"In other words, they had refused even to consider the possibility that Casimir's coffin really *did* contain his mortal remains. This was good news of course, though it was also strangely depressing. I find it rather hard to accept that I'm not supposed to exist." -- p. 66
    • 3/5
      The Reformed Vampire Support Group is a book about about a group of vampires who meet every Tuesday evening at St Agnes Roman Catholic Church. They meet there so they can get help as vampires and so they would learn to control and reform themselves and learn not to harm humans. They live on the blood of guinea pigs instead of human. The main character of the book is Nina, who is 50 years old and looks like a teenager. She still lives at home with her mother and hates the support meeting. When one of their group members was killed they all came together to look for the killer.The Reformed Vampire Group is different from other vampire stories we read about, since it shows a different side to these vampires who vowed never to drink human blood. It is adventurous where most of their time is spent trying to uncover who killed one of them with a silver bullet. They mission is to work together, hunt down the killer and stop him from killing again. The book can make you feel sorry for these vampires as they are tired, sick and week. Also they are in the same support group for over thirty years where they are trying to control their desire for human blood and to convince that they are no harm to humans.
    • 5/5
      To be honest, this book was a lot better than expected! I came in, looking at the cover, expecting a silly vampire story. It actually was, and very fun for it too, but I think this book had more to offer.For one thing, it offers the unique idea that vampires are not super-powerful beings - they are just like sick people. As I believe the werewolf Reuben once put it, it's like they all have AIDS or something, but worse. The vampire infection is just a disease they all have to live with and keep from spreading. These people are so sensitive to the sunlight, the headlights from cars can make the blood vessels in their eyes burst. Half of their lives they spend puking or feeding on guinea pigs that they are actually prescribed in place of humans. It's a miserable existence in contrast to the glamorous/violent life in your usual vampire story.I guess that has a give-take dynamic with how the reader reacts to the story. I mean...it's different. A good thing in this case. It keeps things interesting. You see some struggle you don't normally see. However, it's odd reading this without the supernatural flare vampires usually bring. For example, I am a huge fan of "The Chronicles of Vladimir Tod". The vampire in question doesn't need to be very powerful, but a simple ability such as flight (or hovering, in Vlad's case, early on), mind reading, or added strength is to be expected. Here, they are just like sick people. Well, Nina can see in the dark. But that's about as far as it goes. When you think about that and add staying the same age forever and the possibility of a slayer to the mix, you can see why the vampires in this world actually formed a support group... Also...were-fights. :P Like, illegal dog-fighting. But with werewolves. Yet another thing you will find in this book. Just want to point that out. So...I'd definitely recommend this. :D Don't look for a legendary novel among vampirism or anything, even Nina (vampire writer of vampires) admits she is no Stephanie Meyers, though I place this a thousand leagues above Twilight, this is a fun summer read. I was happy to read it.
    • 1/5
      I picked up this book from the library because I thought the title was very evocative and the description on the back sounded pretty cool. The YA section is stuffed with vampire books these days, and I thought it would be a nice deviation from the rest of what's out there. Well. It is a deviation, in that is very, very boring. This was a chore to get through - even though I was listening to the audiobook and all I had to do was listen. I never cared about any of the characters and the plot dragged and dragged. I wished I was reading the "Bloodstone Chronicles" instead of this. The narrator, Nina - a 51-year-old vamp who was infected when she was 15 - makes her living by writing novels about a bad-ass vamp called Zadia Bloodstone. Zadia is cool, dangerous, super-powered ... everything that Nina and the rest of her reformed vamps are not. I don't read about vampires to sympathize with them, I read to be amazed and scared, grossed out and turned on. Yet the only thing that had a gross factor in this entire book was all the guinea pig murders that dotted the storyline. These pathetic vamps are too docile and and helpless to fang real human beings. They even need to take enzymes every night so that they can digest the guinea pig blood. Because, you know, vampires need to drink human blood - and these guys don't. Rather, they can't, because it's a myth vampires have super-strength and we're told that they wouldn't be able to hunt and kill one if they tried. I nearly didn't finish it, but I stuck it through and it never got any more interesting. Skip this one. Trust me, it was that bad.
    • 3/5
      This was a cute read. It is a huge change from the typical vampire fiction around right now, which pushes the idealized idea of vampires. These vampires are sickly and a little agoraphobic. Nina, Dave and Father Ramon go on a road trip to find a vampire slayer and instead find themselves at an underground werewolf fighting ring. They save the werewolf, eventually find the slayer and everyone learns a little bit about themselves in the process.
    • 5/5
      This book was pretty amazing! Catherine Jinks breaks away from the mold of the "lovable, sweet, drop dead gorgeous" vampire genre. I like how this book showed vampires as being more weak and vulnerable. It also kind of showed that vampires are lazy. Which the main character Nina totally disproves at least about herself. It had just the right amount of romance to give it the "awww" feeling, but it wasn't overly done like in other vampire novels. The main focus was the vampires trying to track down the killer who murdered one of the fellow vampires in the support group. They end up getting stuck in something bigger involving a werewolf. The humor broke up the monotony. This is definitely a great vampire novel.
    • 4/5
      Kind of a funny twist on the vampire thing. And without a lot of the romance of the others. May have to try her other books.
    • 2/5
      Fifteen-year-old vampire Nina has been a part of the Reformed Vampire Support Group for 51 years. She and the other members of the group have vowed never to feed off human blood or turn another human into a vampire, and live dull, repetitive lives trying to stay hidden from humans. That is, until one of their other members is murdered, and they have to solve the crime.Even though the main character, Nina, becomes a vampire as a teenager, I think the style of writing and the cast of characters would generally be more appealing to adults than teens. Though I liked the general concept--vampires as weak and sickly and non-glamorous is an amusing change from the usual sexy vampire stuff--there's a lot of dialogue and not much action, so overall it's a bit slow.
    • 3/5
      I don't mean to be snarky but for someone with great concepts her books are kinda dry. And by dry I mean not as funny as I'd like them to be. Enjoyed that the narrator was Aussie or pulled off a good Aussie in my estimation.
    • 4/5
      Definitely a different take on vampires--which was refreshing in a way (Hot and sexy, BECAUSE they want to kill you but are barely restraining themselves? Really? More than a little disturbing...) , but tended to be a bit overdone. Nina really feels the need to hit you over the head with the whole "vampires are nothing like you think they are" thing. Still, though, it was a fun read. We listened to it in the car--and it took a while to get through, because other things kept interrupting--but the Autralian accent of the narrator really added to the whole experience. We've gone around for weeks now saying things like "cahr" and "Neener" in truly awful accents and it's been a blast. No doubt we'll get around to the author's Abused Werewolves book eventually.
    • 3/5
      I can admit to wanting to read this because of the title. (I didn't read a description until I was halfway through the book.)I thought it was a very unique take on what it's like to be a vampire (you know, if they existed). Nonetheless, I think I'm ready to get on with this year's selected reading challenges. As much as I enjoy YA Fiction, it's time to tackle some of those more challenging titles. I mean, I'm still going to read YA Fiction - I'm looking forward to reading Matched and more from Kristin Cashore, but it's time to try some Ayn Rand and read some of the classics I've missed.This is definitely a good read for Twilight fans AND haters.
    • 2/5
      I have been looking forward to reading this book for a while, especially so since I saw the cover for the companion novel, The Abandoned Werewolf Support Group. I expected Catherine Jinks to be really funny, and hoped that this would be a good readalike for S. G. Browne's Breathers (which deals with zombies). Very much to my disappointment, it was not.

      The main problem is that Jinks goes too far in her attempt to deromanticize vampires. She wants to make them everything that's unlikable, pretty much. They're lazy, slow, stupid, boring and not attractive. Well, she succeeded in not making them Twilightish, but she also succeeded in making them not at all interesting. I didn't give a damn about any of the characters, except maybe Dave, because they were all of the things previously mentioned.

      Plus, I did not much appreciate the constant references to guinea pig nomming. I mean, once, fine, but every time someone needs a little pick me up? And, here's some advice, Jinks: saying that you'll spare the audience a description of the gory happenings is the same as describing it. This is a perfect example of how something was supposed to be both funny and off-putting, but only managed the latter.

      The Reformed Vampire Support Group fell completely flat. It was a struggle to read from the first pages to the last. I am not giving up on Jinks yet, but only because I already have copies of two more of her books to read. I hope, for my sake, that the others are better.
    • 1/5
      Couldn't finish this one. The characters were bland and unmemorable, the plot was slow going and the storyline was nearly non-existent. Made it to pg 100 and couldn't deal with the boredom any longer.
    • 4/5
      Nina's life sucks. She was fanged at fifteen and condemned to a life of being a vampire with the lousy side effects of permanently feeling lousy and weak. To make it worse, every Tuesday night she has to attend her Reformed Vampire Support Group meetings where all the other vampires of her acquaintance whine about how much their lives suck. However, when one of the support group members is staked, life gets a whole lot more interesting.This novel is a fun and different take on vampires. In contrast to most popular vampire novels, Jinks' vampires are sickly, weak, and not all that attractive. The different approach to vampires is also enhanced by the Australian locale, which is a refreshing change. The characters are well-defined and witty. The plot is well-paced and filled with several surprises that I didn't see coming. While full of references to popular vampire series, Jinks' world is unique and well-formed and I thoroughly enjoyed my time in it.
    • 4/5
      A highly enjoyable, tongue in cheek read. A tonic to the overwhelming quantity of low quality vampire literature currently swamping the shelves.
    • 4/5
      This is a completely different take on vampire lore. Vampires are fragile, fearful, harmless, and somewhat pathetic creatures with too many aches and pains to cause anyone real trouble.The story sounds slightly more interesting than it actually is, but there is an element of mystery and adventure that makes the book worth reading. Plus the characters are really unique.I'd say there are about 40 or so YA paranormal books I'd recommend before this one, but if you're looking for a change of pace or have simply read all of the 40 other books I would recommend before this one, give The Reformed Vampire Support Group a chance.
    • 4/5
      Zadia Bloodstone is a fearless crime fighting heroine with superhuman strength, glamorous beauty, and the ability to turn into a bat. Zadia is altogether one powerful vampire you would not want to mess with. Unfortunately for Nina real vampires are not like that, not at all. Well except for the part about sunlight, that part's real, as is the part about a stake through the heart. But as Nina will tell you being a vampire is no way to live, especially a reformed vampire.So much of a vampires' time is spent doing little else then watching tv or using a computer as they are too week and nauseous for anything that requires using a lot of energy. Sensitive to light and sickly looking they are in constant fear of being exposed. Nina dislikes everything about being a vampire, about being weak with no hope of living a normal life. But when her life and those of her fellow vampires are threatened she must find the inner strength to help save them all and change her life, or spend the rest of her long life in fear.The Reformed Vampire Support Group meets ever Tuesday at 9.30pm in St Agatha's Church, and no there has yet to be a meeting involving any spontaneous combustion from its members. For thirty years these vampires have whined and complained about their mundane lives, there chronic fatigue and their stale diets of guinea pigs. But if you can believe it vampires are just like normal people, only more frail and with a lot more allergies. It just goes to show you shouldn't judge others based on stereotypes, its best to read their autobiographies first.
    • 4/5
      A story of a vampire group in Australia who find themselves investigating a murder of one of their number, not that several of them didn't mind that he's dead! It is quite entertaining that they're trying so hard to be normal and the meeting group are almost like an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. It's not a bad story, I enjoyed it, but there were places I thought it could have been a bit better. It did do a good job of working out how this worked and the ramifications of some of the issues.
    • 4/5
      This is very enjoyable. The story is set in Australia, and follows a group of vampires trying to stay alive and cope with one another as well as their depressive situation. They are not traditional vampires. What makes this story amusing is they are sick all the time, their eyes bleed, they have to wear sunglasses, they vomit, they go to a support group each week, and they live off guinea pigs which is a nasty mess to clean up.There is a good story in here, involving murder, but it is quite comical, almost.
    • 1/5
      Couldn't finish this one. The characters were bland and unmemorable, the plot was slow going and the storyline was nearly non-existent. Made it to pg 100 and couldn't deal with the boredom any longer.
    • 4/5
      Nina writes about the trials and tribulations of her group as they try to track down a vampire slayer and get wrapped up in an illegal werewolf fighting ring. Vampirism is a disease and has many not so glamorous side effects. Quirky characters and missteps abound. Listened to the book and the Aussie accent was enjoyable.
    • 5/5
      Heh, first I have to say Vinnie showing up with two hot pizzas to be delivered made me order pizza. Bugs, our heroine, wasn't driving my pizza, so even though I live three blocks away from the pizza place, by the time it arrived I'd finished reading the subliminal "order pizza" part of the book and was on to a stomach-turning Lord of the Fliesish bit. That said, Soul Enchilada is an impressive debut. I work with middle school kids, often with learning disabilities that has slowed their reading progress, often Latino. This is the book I've been waiting for. It's faced paced, has a romance that isn't syrupy, (It's quite a middle-school style romance actually where the couple is just as likely to be shoving each other and swapping insults as they are to be kissing.) that uses the basic "Devil Goes Down to Georgia" plot, ie a competition with the devil where a soul is at stake.Despite the plot everyone who has grown up in a Christian country has heard too many times, Gill manages to put enough twists and turns in it to make it amusing and new. While we're at it, we get to enjoy a good Dia de los muertos in the barrio. & he even manages to tie the whole thing in with the Aztecs & Mayans with their brutal ball game of the gods. I've seen basketball as the ball game of the gods before, but once again, not quite this way.
    • 4/5
      The Reformed Vampire Support group is awesome! In 2009 I was reading pretty much anything with vampires in it (I guess I still am lol) and this one was so different from everything else I was reading which made me love it. It's written well, it's unique, and it's pretty funny at times.If you love vampires, you have got to read this book!
    • 4/5
      In yet another twist on the vampire genre, the unlucky souls are merely infected and find themselves weak and sickly (although I was never quite clear if this was because they aren't drinking human blood or if that is just the way it is in this world). Although Nina has been a vampire for quite a long time, in this novel she finally comes to grips with the ways in which she has been changed and in the ways she can choose what kind of life to have. I did find it odd that despite being so old, Nina still acts like a teenager (which makes for appealing teen fiction, but not for logical consistency). Enjoyable read.
    • 4/5
      Quite a different take on vampires. In this one 51 year old Nina (she was turned in the early 70s) tells her and her group's story. Vampires in the support group are sickly and not at all the powerful, beautiful vampires elsewhere. Cute concept, but could have used some heavy editing.
    • 1/5
      I picked up this book from the library because I thought the title was very evocative and the description on the back sounded pretty cool. The YA section is stuffed with vampire books these days, and I thought it would be a nice deviation from the rest of what's out there. Well. It is a deviation, in that is very, very boring. This was a chore to get through - even though I was listening to the audiobook and all I had to do was listen. I never cared about any of the characters and the plot dragged and dragged. I wished I was reading the "Bloodstone Chronicles" instead of this. The narrator, Nina - a 51-year-old vamp who was infected when she was 15 - makes her living by writing novels about a bad-ass vamp called Zadia Bloodstone. Zadia is cool, dangerous, super-powered ... everything that Nina and the rest of her reformed vamps are not. I don't read about vampires to sympathize with them, I read to be amazed and scared, grossed out and turned on. Yet the only thing that had a gross factor in this entire book was all the guinea pig murders that dotted the storyline. These pathetic vamps are too docile and and helpless to fang real human beings. They even need to take enzymes every night so that they can digest the guinea pig blood. Because, you know, vampires need to drink human blood - and these guys don't. Rather, they can't, because it's a myth vampires have super-strength and we're told that they wouldn't be able to hunt and kill one if they tried. I nearly didn't finish it, but I stuck it through and it never got any more interesting. Skip this one. Trust me, it was that bad.
    • 5/5
      Wonderful book. A new take on vampires. The vampires in this story are reformed, and go to support group meetings every week. They survive on guinea pigs and vitamin supplements. They are completely unlike vampires from movies and other books. They have no superhuman powers, they are weak, sick and fragile. Nina hates being a vampire, it's boring and all the vampires she knows are weak cowards, except for Dave the brooding teenage vampire. Through the adventures in this book, Nina comes to grips with her vampirism and finds some excitement. This is a very cute book with a smidge of romance. I would like to read more about Nina and her friends.
    • 4/5
      Good. I thought it was part of a series, and now that I'm finished with it I wish it were part of a series. Narrator very believable as a vampire who kinda thinks being one sucks. (Pun probably intended; she's just like that.)