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    You're Welcome to Date My Daughter IF...
    You're Welcome to Date My Daughter IF...
    You're Welcome to Date My Daughter IF...
    Ebook91 pages1 hour

    You're Welcome to Date My Daughter IF...

    By J. Richard Lewis

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    About this ebook

    Are you a desperate daughter eager to convince your overly protective (but very LOVING...) dad to let you date that “someone special”? Are you a desperate dad, terrified that your daughter is growing up, wondering how to help her make wise decisions as she manages those dangerous years until she gets married? Wondering how to have “that conversation” to establish an “understanding” with those hormone-crazed teen boys, to help keep your daughter safe, yourself not arrested for being overly protective, and those boys in one piece (last part is optional...)?
    “You're Welcome to Date My Daughter IF...” is a little hand-book that grew out of just those kinds of worries. It started as a personal journey that became a powerful Bible Study dealing with sexuality as one of the crowning gifts of God's creation-- when preserved as the treasure of marriage. Parents, pastors and church leaders who once could count on social and community support outside the church walls to be allies in preserving purity and decency for their daughters now find themselves like salmon fighting their way upstream against powerful cultural currents. Even within many churches, those eager to support traditional sexual values preserving sexual expression for marriage are fighting a counter-cultural battle, not to mention the blatant attacks on purity from all corners of society and the ever-intrusive digital media in which we all constantly swim. Finding honest, forthright (and affordable) tools that parents and churches can both use without apology for content, that is effective, orthodox and even fun to use, is almost as miraculous as Jesus feeding the multitudes.
    This book was written to help fill this gap and need. Written first from a dad's perspective, but also from the perspective of a pastor that remembers all too well the power and pervasiveness of teen hormones, it is hoped that this can not only be a personal resource for families, but a tool that can be used in group settings and bible studies as well. Youth groups, parents groups, men's groups, even around which to build new short term outreach groups for families in the community sharing these concerns, all might find the format (and great price!) of this handbook to be very attractive, useful and user-friendly, both for church folk, and for the not-so-churchy type.
    This handbook and Bible study is built around personal stories and an the all-too-familiar acquaintance with the power of teen hormones recalled in vivid and sometimes embarrassing detail. It is brutal honesty about sexuality and biblical wisdom, a helpful reminder to parents who might think “their children” too innocent for such deceptive hormonal drives, and teens who might think they can pretend with themselves and their parents to the “innocence” of their own behavior and intentions. A great resource for teens, for families, for men's ministries (it might be too direct for our ladies!) for other church or youth groups, and as outreach tools for those churches daring enough to be honest about sexuality.
    Written by an Army Chaplain while deployed and worried about his two precious teenagers, Rev. Lewis has been married for 25 years to his “summer fling” that didn't quite turn out that way, and has served churches and ministries beyond the local church for 20 years. He is completing a PhD in Cultural Foundations in Education.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherJ. Richard Lewis
    Release dateApr 12, 2012
    ISBN9781476437644
    You're Welcome to Date My Daughter IF...

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      Book preview

      You're Welcome to Date My Daughter IF... - J. Richard Lewis

      You're Welcome to

      Date My Daughter

      IF...

      Published by

      J. Richard Lewis

      at Smashwords

      Copyright 2012 J. Richard Lewis

      Also published at Smashwords by J. Richard Lewis:

      Marriage SOS: Spiritual, Obcordate, Sexy First Aid for YOUR Marriage!

      Smashwords Edition, License Notes

      This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

      ~~~~~

      You’re Welcome to Date My Daughter IF…

      Contents:

      Part I--Prerequisites:

      1.IF you know how to dress:

      2.If you know how to speak:

      3.If you are committed to a good education:

      4.IF you DON’T drink, smoke or do drugs: (Including dip)

      5.IF you have a clean driving and criminal record:

      6.IF you understand and are committed to honor, chivalry, duty and integrity:

      7.IF you know how to treat a lady:

      8.IF you realize that romance and sex are not the same thing:

      9.IF you realize that there’s only one kind of BASEBALL you can play with my daughter, and is has NOTHING to do with dating:

      10.IF you know (or are willing to learn) how to end a relationship well:

      11.IF you recognize that she always has been, is, and always will be my precious daughter, a treasure I am committed to protecting above all else:

      12.IF you tell me about your faith first:

      13.IF you are committed to sexual purity before marriage:

      Part II--Dating Behavior:

      14.IF you tell me your plan:

      15.If you tell me your emergency plan:

      16.IF you go out with a group:

      17.IF you recognize that to even THINK about the question of whether it is appropriate to kiss her on the first date is moving WAY too fast:

      18.IF you understand that dating my daughter is very similar to soccer:

      19.IF you understand what a CHASTE kiss is:

      20.IF you understand plain English:

      21.IF you know how to tell time:

      22.Weeping and Gnashing of Teeth:

      23.Concluding thoughts

      You’re Welcome to Date My Daughter IF:

      ~~~~~

      A Handbook for:

      Teen boys who want to have even HALF a chance with MY DAUGHTER and girls like her

      Dads to help make the ground rules ABUNDANTLY CLEAR to those boys, without risking jail

      Daughters who have a boy in mind who they want to get approved by Dad

      Moms, to help you feel comfortable that The Dad is on the job!

      Stand-In Dads, to encourage you to do your part (see above)

      By J. Richard Lewis and some of his rather imposing military friends who remember TOO well being a hormone-crazed teen boy, and who are eager to help said boys understand their precarious position.

      ~~~~~

      Introduction

      I wrote this book with my friends’ help because we now have daughters, and we are kind enough to let YOU know before you even get close to our daughters that WE know the lusts you think you can hide. We REMEMBER—it was not that long ago that WE were hormone-crazed teen boys thinking and trying to get away with EXACTLY what YOU are thinking and trying to get away with.

      It may seem that dads like us are control freaks, and for some of us that’s true. It would help you stay healthy and in one piece if you remember that immutable fact. Others of us are only control freaks if you think of any sports’ referees and umpires as control freaks. The problem comes when a boy is trying to play Capture the Flag, without realizing that my daughter is playing Keep-Away—two very different games with very different sets of rules. Just as any sports team can have a great time--as long as they play by the rules-- so too, can you have a great time (not THAT great a time!) in a dating relationship with my daughter.

      In addition to the rules of the game that we are laying out here, it might be helpful for you to remember a few other bits of wisdom for your health and welfare: I am the umpire, and I can KICK you out of the game at any time (take the term literally or figuratively, whichever you prefer; you might want to know that Soccer was my game, and I always played a very tight defense!).

      Neither am I nor are all the other dads who may have helped you get a look at this book, always rational. I retain the right to interpret these rules either very strictly or very loosely, however I see fit at any given time. In this game, it is the umpire (which is of course, ME) who has the bat—a very BIG bat, mind you.

      You also might want to know that my daughter has gone through several types of self-defense training, and practices regularly on me, a hardened Soldier. While I consider myself a peacemaker, I am not and never have been a pacifist, but am rather a firm believer in peace through strength (you might want to look up Peacemaker on your favorite on-line reference to see what kind of TOOLS are referred to as Peacemaker.)

      Since I don’t claim to be rational in writing this, I don’t feel much of a need to be consistent, either, at least in a literary sense. So I will as I see fit, bounce back and forth between addressing as you, the teenage boy who is interested in my daughter, and you the dad of other teenage daughters interested in their protection.

      I have at the same time also written this as a handbook for our daughters and their mothers, whom I might also address as you. I hope you already know into which category you fit; I trust that you can figure out from the context, to whom I am addressing at any given time. If not, re-read it; it might push you to THINK—a novel concept I know, but that, too, might do you good, and it might help you get the point even better, which is an especially good thing if you are one of those teen boys.

      Note to dads :

      I have a friend whose 17 year old daughter is pregnant and unmarried at the time of this writing. She and her younger sister have been living with my friend’s ex-wife, but with my friend in Iraq with me, the younger daughter decided to go live with my friend’s new wife in another community. After only a short time in her new school, the girl asked, Where are all the pregnant girls? You see, in her mom’s community, ONE IN THREE girls in her high school is pregnant. In this new school she didn’t see any other than herself.

      With her

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