Present Over Perfect Study Guide: Leaving Behind Frantic for a Simpler, More Soulful Way of Living
By Shauna Niequist and Ashley Wiersma
3.5/5
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About this ebook
"For too many years I missed out on the life God had given me to live—to steward—because I was too busy trying to build a life that looked more...perfect." Shauna Niequist invites you to leave behind perfection-seeking and embrace presence as a way of life—free from illusions and soaked in grace.
In this five-session video Bible study (DVD/digital video sold separately), New York Times bestselling author Shauna Niequist will take you on the same journey that changed her own life—away from frantic striving and toward a soulful thriving.
Maintaining an image of perfection is exhausting, and it isn't the way we're meant to live. The Present Over Perfect Study Guide will help you and your group pull each other free from the constant pressure to perform faster, push harder, and produce more. Watch Shauna give a vulnerable account of what led her to begin this journey, and a compelling vision for an entirely new way to live: soaked in grace, rest, silence, simplicity, prayer, and connection with the people that matter most to us.
The study guide includes first thoughts, video notes, group discussion questions, practicing presence reflections, and solo work for you to complete between sessions.
Sessions include:
- Pain Points
- The Roles We Play
- Yes, And No
- Unflashy, Unspectacular, Good
- Living the Love
Designed for use with the Present Over Perfect Video Study 9780310816034 (sold separately).
Shauna Niequist
Shauna Niequist is the New York Times best-selling author of seven books, including I Guess I Haven’t Learned that Yet and Present Over Perfect. Shauna and her husband, Aaron, and their sons, Henry and William, live in New York City. Shauna is an avid reader and traveler, and a passionate gatherer of people, especially around the table.
Read more from Shauna Niequist
Present Over Perfect: Leaving Behind Frantic for a Simpler, More Soulful Way of Living Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Bread and Wine: A Love Letter to Life Around the Table with Recipes Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Savor: Living Abundantly Where You Are, As You Are (A 365-Day Devotional) Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Book of Waking Up: Experiencing the Divine Love That Reorders a Life Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5I Guess I Haven't Learned That Yet: Discovering New Ways of Living When the Old Ways Stop Working Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How to Survive a Shipwreck: Help Is On the Way and Love Is Already Here Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Cold Tangerines: Celebrating the Extraordinary Nature of Everyday Life Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Bittersweet: Thoughts on Change, Grace, and Learning the Hard Way Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Coming Clean: A Story of Faith Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Out of the House of Bread: Satisfying Your Hunger for God with the Spiritual Disciplines Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Scoot Over and Make Some Room: Creating a Space Where Everyone Belongs Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Speak: How Your Story Can Change the World Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Present Over Perfect Guided Journal: Journey to a Simpler, More Soulful Life Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Colors of Goodbye: A Memoir of Holding On, Letting Go, and Reclaiming Joy in the Wake of Loss Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Slow Down Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Disruptive Compassion: Becoming the Revolutionary You Were Born to Be Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsI Guess I Haven't Learned That Yet Study Guide plus Streaming Video: Discovering New Ways of Living When the Old Ways Stop Working Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
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Reviews for Present Over Perfect Study Guide
97 ratings6 reviews
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The author describes her journey away from a hectic, exhausting life trying to please anyone. She realised that her health and family were suffering, and made some positive decisions to cut back on commitments, travelling and even possessions. Written in short sections, there's much to think about and some useful nuggets of wisdom even for those of us who already have fairly calm and relaxed lifestyles. There's a strong underlying Christian theme, but much of the content could be of interest and inspiration even to those of other faiths, or none at all. Recommended.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Present Over Perfect was a life-changing book, an absolute mandatory read for all moms, wives, mothers out there. There's so much pressure on us to achieve more, be more, do more, and we compete against each other on being the better and best mom, the best wife, the best employee - We want to prove that we can do what no one else can. We are superwomen, but at what cost? This was an absolute wake-up call for me. I never keep books - I always pass them along, but I need to keep this one for a reminder.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Short of It:Are you a perfectionist? Do you try to keep all the balls in the air at the same time? Do you have trouble saying no? This book focuses on being present over perfect. Perfection is highly overrated and if you are like me and fail at it miserably, you will find much to relate to in this audio book.The Rest of It:What’s funny is that if you ask the people around me, they will say that I’m not failing at all. Because, on the outside, I look like I have it all together. I know this because I’ve been told this. I’ve even been referred to as a Stepford Mom and if that person happens to be reading, PLEASE do not be upset over it. I secretly enjoyed the comment and it has stayed with me for years. I mean, it was kind of a compliment, at least to my perfection-striving self.Those who know me will also say that for years I’ve been trying to simplify and that my calendar is always a work-in-progress. Lord, I try. I try to cook real food, learn things, spend time with my family but I spend a lot of time driving back and forth, or holed up in a parking lot waiting for something to end.A good friend gifted me this book on Audible and it could have been written by me. I could relate to every, single story within it. Present Over Perfect is a book of observations. Each chapter is an observation of what Niequist dealt with as she was trying to focus on being present with those around her, and not so perfect. Listening to this book was like a soothing balm to my soul.My word for the year is Gather and because I am a perfectionist by nature, the idea of inviting people into my home when things are less than perfect is very uncomfortable for me but Niequist addresses that and of course everything she says makes perfect sense. While waiting for perfection that will never come, my home remains closed off to the people I’ve been trying to invite in. Ironic, no?If you enjoy self-reflection and struggle with perfection, you will find yourself nodding to much of what Niequist details here. She comes across as gentle, but genuine. I’m so glad my friend gifted it to me!For more reviews, visit my blog: Book Chatter.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5This is a highly personal, graceful, almost intimately voiced book. It deals with developing mindful presence and commited choicefulness over the cultural allure of busy-ness, over-committing and burnout that many women seem to be challenged by.My favorite part and the part that hit me the hardest was the call to candy-throwing. Recommended.
1 person found this helpful
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Present Over Perfect was a life-changing book, an absolute mandatory read for all moms, wives, mothers out there. There's so much pressure on us to achieve more, be more, do more, and we compete against each other on being the better and best mom, the best wife, the best employee - We want to prove that we can do what no one else can. We are superwomen, but at what cost? This was an absolute wake-up call for me. I never keep books - I always pass them along, but I need to keep this one for a reminder.
1 person found this helpful
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Every now and then a book will fall into your hands at exactly the right moment, providing information you didn't know you needed. That's how I feel about "Present Over Perfect." The author talks about how she always thought of herself as the super-responsible one, the person who could do anything she set her mind to, who was tougher and more capable and more determined than anyone else in the room, the one who never said "no" to a new request, no matter how exhausted she was. I recognized myself in that description...not a happy revelation. But as I listened to the author reading the audio version of this book, listened as she considered why she had developed that method of dealing with the world and if it was really serving her soul, it helped me take stock of my own life. This is a short book but its message is powerful: live in the moment, enjoy each day. Highly recommended.
1 person found this helpful
Book preview
Present Over Perfect Study Guide - Shauna Niequist
A Note from Shauna
Think for a moment about the word perfect. For far too many years, that’s all I did: I thought about perfect; I worked toward perfect; I held up perfect
as my prized ideal. I wanted perfect holidays and perfect vacations, perfect dinner parties and perfect celebrations with friends. Professionally, I wanted a perfect track record as one who always got everything done. And so I strived for perfect, I sacrificed too much for perfect, I pushed and proved and hustled and competed and went as hard and as fast as I possibly could—all for the sake of perfect, all in the name of realizing my elusive perfect dream.
I did these things because something inside of me said, If you let up or slow down, you will lose.
Lose what, exactly? I wasn’t sure, but I had my suspicions.
What if I lose my Most Dependable title?
Future job opportunities?
Admiration and praise?
In the end, what I lost was my soul, which is the very worst thing to lose.
I missed out on the life God had given me to live—to steward—because I was too busy building a different life, a life that looked more. . . perfect.
Along the way, I picked a different word to live by, a word that brought me back to that divinely gifted life. The word is present, and present is something perfect will never be. Present is living with your feet firmly grounded in reality, pale and uncertain as it may seem,
I wrote on the heels of that wind-whipped season. Present is choosing to believe that your own life is worth investing deeply in, instead of waiting for some rare miracle or fairy tale. Present means we understand that the here and now is sacred, sacramental, threaded through with divinity even in its plainness. Especially in its plainness.
Present, I found—and am still finding—is rejecting all the climbing up and choosing to simply come down. To come down to the ground, and to God, to the soil, the vibrations of life. Present is settledness. Stillness. Rest. Present is no to chaos and yes to calm. It is a deep-seated sense of allrightness . . . it is acceptance and contentment and ease.
And so, the book (and this curriculum). It was four years in the making, and it is my invitation to you, to leave behind perfection-seeking and embrace presence as a way of life. It’s better here, I promise—free from illusions, inspiring and good.
How to Use This Guide
Welcome to the video-based curriculum for Present Over Perfect. As Shauna has already mentioned, her deep desire is for the same level of spiritual sanity and settledness that she has come to know after walking through four of the most challenging—and rewarding—years of her life to be yours, fully and completely. To that end, she has put together a five-session experience aimed at helping you untangle whatever knots are keeping you from living the beautiful, orderly, God-centered life you were created to live.
BEFORE YOU GET GOING
To get the most out of Present Over Perfect, in addition to this study guide gather the following goods prior to diving in:
The Present Over Perfect five-session video
A copy of Shauna’s book, Present Over Perfect: Leaving BehindFrantic for a Simpler, More Soulful Way of Living (Zondervan, 2016)
Your favorite Bible (this guide looks to The Message, but any translation is fine)
A pen, and extra paper or a journal, in case you need more space to log your thoughts
NOTES FOR THE JOURNEY AHEAD
Consider rallying a few friends, family members, or colleagues to walk through this experience with you. Certainly, you can work through the content on your own, but the best growth happens in community, and while sharing your burdens aloud in the presence of other living, breathing human beings can feel a little scary at first, the support and strength you’ll feel as a result of sojourning with others who also are choosing candor will be worth it in the end.
Once you confirm who will be joining you for the journey, choose a time and date to kick things off, and also decide how frequently you will meet. This guide has been arranged according to five sessions; divide those across five weeks, if you wish, or another interval that makes sense for your group. Regarding facilitation, feel free to rotate leadership responsibilities, or else declare one member the point person for all five sessions. Facilitation cues appear in blue italic type at the beginning of each section. And speaking of sections, there are six to be aware of. Here they are, explained:
This Session: An overview of the theme covered that session/week.
First Thoughts: An opening icebreaker for group discussion.
Video Notes: Space to capture memorable quotes from the video segment.
Inviting Others In: Questions for your group to discuss and answer.
Practicing Presence: A closing liturgy for your group to read and reflect on.
Solo Work: Questions, exercises, and journal prompts for you to complete between sessions.
If Shauna’s firsthand experience thus far declares anything, it is that despite the messes we have made in life, by God’s grace, we can remake something wonderful. Let the new edition begin!
SESSION 1
Pain Points
It wasn’t so long ago that we ourselves were stupid and stubborn, dupes of sin, ordered every which way by our glands, going around with a chip on our shoulder, hated and hating back. But when God, our kind and loving Savior God, stepped in, he saved us from all that.
—Titus 3:3–5, The Message¹
THIS SESSION
Have a group member read the following paragraphs aloud as a way to center everyone’s thoughts on this session’s topic.
We’re all pushing for something, for the life we think we want. We strive and strain and orchestrate and negotiate, in hopes of stitching together an existence that satisfies, but in the end,