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Bark If It's Murder
Bark If It's Murder
Bark If It's Murder
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Bark If It's Murder

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Lilly Echosby just witnessed a murder on a pet cam. Or did she?
 
When a last-minute opportunity arises to accompany her boss to an art auction in Atlanta, Lilly throws some money at the problem of where to board her toy poodle Aggie (short for Agatha Christie). Posh Pet Haven offers the most luxurious canine accommodations in all of Chattanooga, Tennessee. The place even provides pet cams so anxious owners can check in on their pampered pooches.
 
But when Lilly tries to take a peek at her poodle, she gets a terrible shock—she witnesses what she’s sure is a murder. She thinks the victim may be the wealthy co-owner of Pet Haven. The police follow her lead but find no body, no evidence of a crime, and no video record. Starting to feel like the dog owner who cried wolf, Lilly decides to go undercover to catch a killer who may be hiding in plain sight …
LanguageEnglish
PublisherLyrical Press
Release dateAug 27, 2019
ISBN9781516107896
Author

V.M. Burns

Valerie (V. M.) Burns is a mystery writer whose novels and short stories have been finalists for the Agatha, Anthony, Edgar, and Next Generation Indie Book Awards. She is the author of the Mystery Bookshop, Dog Club, RJ Franklin, and Baker Street Mystery series. Valerie is a member of Sisters in Crime, Crime Writers of Color, Mystery Writers of America, and the Crime Writers' Association. She is also an adjunct professor in the Writing Popular Fiction Program at Seton Hill University in Greensburg, PA. Born and raised in northwestern Indiana, Valerie now lives in the southeastern United States with her two poodles. Connect with Valerie at VMBurns.com.  

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  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This is a mystery where the amateur sleuths actually avoids doing anything pointlessly dangerous. Also, the dogs, large and small, are treated like real, normal dogs, and not stereotyped based on either size or breed by the author. That's a nice change, after some books with dogs I've read lately.Lilly Ann Echosby has moved from Indiana to Tennessee. Her husband was murdered. These events were covered in the two previous books that I haven't read, but I had little difficulty picking up the essentials to follow the story. Lilly is a CPA, currently working at a museum in Chattanooga, getting them ready for tax time. She also owns a six-pound toy poodle named Aggie, whom the author, quite amazingly in my recent experience, depicts as a real, normal dog. Lilly and Aggie are even taking obedience classes--which is where Lilly has met most of her local friends.When Lilly takes a trip to Atlanta with the museum head, she boards Aggie at a luxury pet facility, which, a big selling point for Lilly, has pet cams enabling the pet owners to check in on their pets whenever they wish. It's very reassuring for Lilly--right up until her late afternoon check-in from Atlanta, when there's a major electrical storm in Chattanooga. She loses the camera in Aggie's room, and after a moment is connected to a camera in another part of the facility. While watching that camera, briefly, she sees what appears to be a man strangling a woman. The man appears to be the male half of the couple who own the facility, and the woman appears to be the female half of the couple.Lilly calls her maybe-boyfriend, who is a detective with the Tennessee Bureau of Investigation. The local police are contacted, and investigation quickly reveals that the man was out of state, the woman is now out of state at a dog show, and nobody has been reported missing. Another employee, one Lilly had observed to be strangely familiar with her male boss, has seemingly quit abruptly.What's going on?What follows is a tricky investigation, with Lilly, but not the police, convinced that something is seriously wrong. She does, impressively for an amateur sleuth in a cozy mystery, avoid doing anything crazy dangerous. All there are mentions of Aggie having risked her life trying to protect her owner in a past adventure, she doesn't have to repeat that in this book.And, oh, real dogs, and real dog owners, some of them even what I'd call real dog people. Real dogs of all sizes, and a total of three poodles. (The other two are standards.)It's not a perfect book, but I really enjoyed it.I bought this book.

Book preview

Bark If It's Murder - V.M. Burns

EYEWITNESS TO MURDER

I was still smiling when I pulled up my laptop and navigated to Pet Haven’s website. I could hear the storm getting louder, and the Internet site that had been clear earlier in the day was staticky and slower tonight. I finally caught a glimpse of Aggie. She had moved from the bearskinned rug to the cot, which was littered with stuffed animals. I was just about to turn off the screen when it flickered and then jumped to a view of one of the other cameras. I clicked around the menu on several links, which switched from one room to another in search of the link that would take me back to Aggie. Just about to give up, I clicked on a link that showed a woman spraying down the outside area of the kennels. It appeared to be raining there, too, but, the kennel area was covered. I squinted to make out who the woman was. It looked like the owner, Keri Lynn Simpson. She wore a yellow rain slicker and boots. I was glad to see Pet Haven was true to their brochures and cleaned every night. Her back was to the camera. She must have gotten a call because she moved the hose to her left hand and pulled out her cell phone. She glanced at the phone and then returned it to her pocket.

I was just about to shut down when a shadow approached her from behind. That was when I saw a man’s arm reach around and grab her from the back. He put his hands around her neck and squeezed.

She dropped the hose and clawed at the man’s arms and face, but it was too little, too late.

She slid to the ground.

What did I just see? What just happened?

Thunder clapped, and my screen went black…

Books by V.M. Burns

Mystery Bookshop Series

THE PLOT IS MURDER

READ HERRING HUNT

THE NOVEL ART OF MURDER

WED, READ & DEAD

Dog Club Series

IN THE DOG HOUSE

THE PUPPY WHO KNEW TOO MUCH

BARK IF IT’S MURDER

Published by Kensington Publishing Corporation

Table of Contents

EYEWITNESS TO MURDER

Books by V.M. Burns

Acknowledgments

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Bark If It’s Murder

V.M. Burns

LYRICAL UNDERGROUND

Kensington Publishing Corp.

www.kensingtonbooks.com

To the extent that the image or images on the cover of this book depict a person or persons, such person or persons are merely models, and are not intended to portray any character or characters featured in the book.

LYRICAL UNDERGROUND BOOKS are published by

Kensington Publishing Corp.

119 West 40th Street

New York, NY 10018

Copyright © 2019 by V.M. Burns

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means without the prior written consent of the Publisher, excepting brief quotes used in reviews.

All Kensington titles, imprints, and distributed lines are available at special quantity discounts for bulk purchases for sales promotion, premiums, fund-raising, educational, or institutional use.

Special book excerpts or customized printings can also be created to fit specific needs. For details, write or phone the office of the Kensington Sales Manager: Kensington Publishing Corp., 119 West 40th Street, New York, NY 10018. Attn. Sales Department. Phone: 1-800-221-2647.

Lyrical Underground and Lyrical Underground logo Reg. US Pat. & TM Off.

First Electronic Edition: August 2019

eISBN-13: 978-1-5161-0789-6

eISBN-10: 1-5161-0789-6

First Print Edition: August 2019

ISBN-13: 978-1-5161-0792-6

ISBN-10: 1-5161-0792-6

Printed in the United States of America

Acknowledgments

As always, I want to thank Dawn Dowdle at Blue Ridge Literary Agency; and my editor, John Scognamiglio, and all of the great people at Kensington.

Thanks to Anthony Trooper Tony Cameron and to your TBI friends for answering my questions. Thanks to my work family (Chuck, Jill, Lindsey, and Tim), and to our leader, Sandy Morrison, for being so supportive (I hope I can return the favor one day). I’m grateful for my wonderful team (Amber, Derrick, Eric, Jennifer, Jonathan, and Robin). I truly appreciate the amazing Training Team who do so much to support me (Tena, Grace, Jamie, Deborah, and Kristie). Y’all are the best. Special thanks to Monica Jill, Linda Kay, and Weyman for being such good sports.

If it weren’t for the wonderful memories I had as a member of Echo Dog Club in Buchanan, Michigan, this series would not have happened. So I want to thank all of my amazing Echo friends. Thank you to Eva Marie Mitchell (Dreem Poodles) for fact-checking my conformation details. Thanks to Becky Rae Halsey and Stephen Bryant for helping with the techie speak. Thanks to Debra Ramish, Deb Childs, and Dr. Jan Sanders for allowing me to pick your brains.

None of these books would be possible without the love and support of my family. Thank you, Benjamin Burns and Jackie Rucker; Jillian, Marcella and Drew Merkel; and Christopher, Carson, and Crosby Rucker.

I wouldn’t be able to do any of this without my buddies Sophia Muckerson and Shelitha Mckee. Thank you both for listening and keeping me sane through all of the madness.

Chapter 1

Is that a cow?

Dixie snorted from the back seat. Didn’t you have cows in Indiana?

I turned around in my seat and looked around the car seat’s headrest. We do have cows in Indiana in the country, but not in the city. Cows belong in the country. I’m a city girl.

Monica Jill pulled the car into the driveway and eagerly turned to face me. It’s just a few cows. They’re behind a fence. She pointed to the fence across the road.

I shook my head. Nope. No cows.

She sighed. Cows weren’t on your list.

The list my Realtor was referring to was my list of must-haves and deal breakers for my new home.

Monica Jill held up her hand and ticked items off. No mountains or steep hills, no basement garages, no bears, coyotes, snakes, and now…cows. She sighed. Three bedrooms, two baths, in your price point, which aren’t on a mountain or hill or near any type of wildlife, is challenging, especially in Chattanooga.

You can afford to raise your budget, Dixie said tentatively.

This was a conversation we’d had before. Technically, I could afford a much more expensive house than the limits I’d set for myself. I’d been frugal with the money from selling the house I’d shared with my husband in Indiana. I was determined not to touch the life insurance money, preferring to create trusts for our children. Stephanie and David were both grown and on their own. Stephanie was a lawyer in Chicago, and David was an actor in New York. I couldn’t help but think at some point they would marry or purchase homes and I wanted to be able to help them. However, I didn’t need to look back at Dixie to know she was alluding to the million dollars my husband had socked away in an offshore bank account before he was murdered. However, I wasn’t comfortable touching that money, at least not until the police investigation was over.

The housing market here is super hot and it’s not easy finding properties that meet all of your criteria and now I need to eliminate all houses that are close to cows? Monica Jill looked at me over her tortoiseshell and mother-of-pearl glasses. She was a thin woman with long, dark-brown hair and brown eyes.

Yep. That’s what I’m saying. I stared back at her.

The look on her face almost made me feel sorry for her. It had to be difficult for a Realtor to spend hours driving people like me around, burning up their gas, especially since she wouldn’t get paid unless I bought a house. As of this minute, I estimated she’d shown me fifty-two houses. I’d never considered myself a difficult client, but apparently I was. Living in the foothills of the Appalachian Mountains meant finding a house that wasn’t on a mountain or a steep hill was challenging. Few homes had all of my must-haves.

I’m hungry. Let’s eat and talk about our next move. She backed her car out of the driveway, all the time mumbling under her breath about cows.

Monica Jill drove to a seafood restaurant in downtown Chattanooga which was known for its shrimp and grits. I’d admit, prior to moving south, shrimp and grits was not a combination that would have appealed to me. In fact, grits wasn’t exactly on my top-twenty list of favorite foods. However, the spicy dish had grown on me. While we ate and sipped sweet tea, another Southern favorite, we talked about options.

Monica Jill pulled up the Multiple Listing Service app on her phone and showed me the homes that fit her filter, and I acknowledged that pickings were slim. Monica Jill Nelson was a devout Christian with an almost sickeningly optimistic disposition. We met in the dog obedience class Dixie taught at the Eastern Tennessee Dog Club. Now we were both members of the Eastern Tennessee Dog Club and were enrolled for a second round of basic training. My toy poodle, Aggie, was an exceptionally smart dog, as was Monica Jill’s dog, Jac, a mutt with lots of personality and a genuine zest for life. After a relatively short period of time with Dixie, we both realized our dogs needed a firm hand and consistent training. Jac was a rambunctious puppy who, according to Dixie, needed a way to release energy to stay out of trouble. At three, Aggie was older and more devious. Her training was more to teach me than her. After a few weeks in class, I realized Monica Jill was a Realtor and enlisted her help to find a forever home for Aggie and me.

Monica Jill swiped her phone with one hand and shoveled food into her mouth with the other. "If you aren’t willing to raise your budget or reduce your deal breaker list, are you willing to consider a house that needs a bit of updating?"

I thought about it for a minute. Maybe. It depends on how much work.

She smiled. Great. When we finish eating, we’ll go take a look at another house. She picked up her phone and dialed a number.

Wait, where is it?

Before she could answer me, the scheduling office picked up and she arranged a showing.

Dixie and I exchanged a glance.

Dixie raised a finely arched brow and stared at Monica Jill, then shrugged and continued eating. Dixie and I had been friends in college, but we’d lost touch. After graduation, she’d moved back to Chattanooga and married her high school sweetheart, Beauregard Beau Jefferson. I married Albert, and after the children, Dixie and I drifted apart. A few months ago, Albert decided to trade me in like one of the cars on his used car lot for a woman named Bambi who was younger than our children. That was when I decided to make some much-needed life changes. I decided to move someplace warm and sunny and reconnected with my old friend.

Scarlett Dixie Jefferson was a big woman. At close to six feet, Dixie was a Southern belle with big Dolly Parton hair and a bigger personality to match, and a heart as big as the Tennessee River.

After lunch, Monica Jill drove us to what she called a transitional neighborhood near the last house I’d rented. Due to a series of unfortunate events, which involved a dead body and the police believing I’d murdered my landlord, I had moved out and was back in a hotel with my dog and desperate to find permanent housing.

The neighborhood was off of a major street, but unlike most of the properties I’d seen so far, this one wasn’t in a subdivision or the country. I liked it. Not just because there was no association fee, but I liked the fact this was an actual neighborhood with an eclectic mixture of houses, unlike the area where I moved from in Indiana where all the houses were basically the same except with different color siding. I also liked that there was no group with the power to dictate everything from the number of pets I could have to whether or not I had a fence. Even the rental had a neighborhood association that controlled the length of the grass and the types of Christmas decorations allowed. In all fairness, most of the association’s rules were fair and reasonable, but I had spent too many years listening to others—from my late husband to a neighborhood group—to allow myself to continue to be ruled by anyone else. I was now determined to find my happy place and enjoy my life once and for all.

The house we stopped at was a single-story house built in the 1980s. The inside reflected the best and the worst of the decade. From the amazing wall of windows that overlooked the backyard to the vaulted ceilings in the great room to the mauve floral wallpaper and coordinating border.

Why did anyone think a black sunken tub was a good idea? Dixie stared at the master bath and shook her head.

I quietly roamed from room to room.

This carpet is unfortunate. Monica Jill frowned at the striped carpeting that had undoubtedly been picked to coordinate with the wallpaper. Maybe there are hardwoods underneath. She perked up and walked to the corner of the room and tried to pry an edge away from the vent. After a bit of work, she dropped the carpet and replaced the vent. Bummer.

I opened one of the three sliding glass doors that overlooked the backyard. I stepped outside onto a faded, threadbare well-worn green carpet.

The yard was large and completely fenced in by an old wooden privacy fence that was weathered and obviously had seen better days. There were gaps where boards had come off and been filled in with hog wire to prevent anything larger than a small squirrel from escaping. The grass and plantings were overgrown, and a large koi pond sat covered by leaves. Stale, stagnant water, which had accumulated over the years, sent up a pungent aroma that caused even the ever-optimistic Monica Jill to frown.

I shocked the frown off her face by saying, I like it.

Both Monica Jill and Dixie turned to stare at me as though I’d suddenly lost my mind.

Are you serious? Dixie asked.

It needs work, but—

That’s an understatement. She laughed.

I stared at the house. It has good potential. I spent the next twenty minutes explaining what needed to be done and what this house could become.

Both Dixie and Monica Jill were shocked, but both recognized the house had good bones. Years of watching design shows on HGTV had made me a believer of what a house could become with a little work, and by the end, they were both not only enthusiastic, but supportive. We walked out after nearly an hour in the house with a plan for a renovation that would turn this 1980s remodel into a contemporary gem.

Monica Jill locked up while Dixie and I explored the neighborhood. When we’d arrived, I hadn’t noticed that the house next door was also for sale. We took a few minutes to check it out too.

Similar to its neighbor, this house was also built in the eighties. However, a quick glance in the front window showed this contemporary home to have been renovated inside.

When Monica Jill joined us, we asked to see the inside.

This house isn’t showing up in the MLS. She swiped her cell phone and quickly dialed the listing agent whose name was on the sign. While she talked, Dixie and I walked around back. Just like the house next door, this house had a huge fenced-in backyard. However, instead of a koi pond and overgrown landscaping, this home had a massive deck that went around the side of the house and extended well out into the yard. The deck had been built around several mature trees and bore the outline of a pool, which was now gone.

Wow. Dixie whistled.

Crepe myrtle, dogwood, Bradford pear, and crab apple trees, along with several I couldn’t identify, provided a canopy of shade that would be beautiful when in bloom and a nightmare in the fall when the leaves fell.

The listing agent gave Monica Jill the okay to show us the property and the code to unlock the key box on the back door.

The house wasn’t large, but unlike its neighbor, this one had undergone renovations at some point during the past few decades. Instead of the hideous striped carpet that existed next door, this house had hardwood floors in the public areas. All wallpaper had been removed, and the walls were painted a neutral gray. The three bedrooms were carpeted, and the master bedroom and bath had recently had the glass block that was still in place next door, removed. This house wasn’t new construction perfect, but it was livable. While talking to Dixie and Monica Jill about the remodeling needed next door, I had gotten excited about the idea of a project and putting my own stamp on my house. Walking through this house helped me put into perspective the total amount of work needed.

So, what do you think? Dixie asked tentatively.

I gazed out onto the deck. I think I want to place an offer.

Monica Jill smiled. Great. Which house?

This one.

Dixie let out a breath. Thank God.

I smiled. I thought you liked the house next door?

She nodded. "I do like the house. I like both houses, but the other one needs a lot more work. At least, if you want to make renovations to this house, you can still live in it."

Agreed.

Monica Jill smiled. Well, that’s great. My office is just around the corner. Let’s hightail it over there and get our offer in. According to Matt, the listing agent, he’s expecting another offer and we want to get ours in as soon as possible.

She drove us the short distance to her office, and I waited while she pulled up a mountain of papers for me to sign.

I’m going home. I’ve still got a lot to do before the show tomorrow. Dixie stared at Monica Jill and me. Don’t forget, you both signed up to work the dog show.

We both nodded.

In addition to teaching canine obedience classes at the Eastern Tennessee Dog Club (ETDC), Dixie’s dogs had competed in various dog sports, including conformation and obedience. Now that her two

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