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    House of Karens: Ixtab Media Presents, #1
    House of Karens: Ixtab Media Presents, #1
    House of Karens: Ixtab Media Presents, #1
    Ebook52 pages40 minutes

    House of Karens: Ixtab Media Presents, #1

    By David X Reiver and Lazarus Tooms

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    About this ebook

    House of Karens is the story of Raphael, a talented, lonely man who returns home one evening to find him home overrun with angry Karens.

     

    A novella by Lazarus Tooms (debut novel incoming) comissiong by Ixtab Media as our freshman entry into the Ixtab Media Presents series. Darkly comic horror, timely premises, and advocacy. We are creating pulp with purpose.

     

    All proceeds of this novella will go to charities benefiting those most affected by the Karen plague.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherIxtab Media
    Release dateJul 16, 2020
    ISBN9781393650348
    House of Karens: Ixtab Media Presents, #1

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      Book preview

      House of Karens - David X Reiver

      Copyright:

      Copyright © 2020 - Lazaruz Tooms and Ixtab Media, all rights reserved.

      This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to events, locations, people, or Karens is completely coincidental. The opinions alluded to in this work are those of Lazarus Tooms and are not necessarily representative of the idealogy possessed by Ixtab Media as a whole.

      The scanning, uploading, and distribution of this story without permission is, like, really bad and also illegal. Please contact our legal department at permission@ixtabmedia.com if you require assistance. Thank you in advance, you’re pretty cool.

      Ixtab Media is a worldwide indie publishing company with offices in Tokyo, Newcastle-Upon-Tyne, and Milwaukee. For more information visit ixtabmedia.com or twitter.com/ixtabmedia

      Cover Hi Karens by Garland Majors

      We are proud of our non-performatively diverse team of editors, writers, and other artists and would be happy to hear from you if you have any ideas regarding future novellas or if you just want to chat or give us money.

      All grammatical mistakes are: intentional. 

      Contents:

      About this book and Ixtab Media in general:

      We are a rogue collective of creators with a variety of backgrounds. Our goal is to explore the world of art and promote fresh voices. We’re proponents of fair pay and amplifying groups that are ignored by an increasingly totemically progressive and hegemonic publishing industry.

      This short story is not necessarily representative of our work as a whole. It was created as a fundraiser for charities supporting individuals affected by the increasing threat of the Karen. All profits will go toward supporting these charities, hence the price. The author has created this work with this goal in mind. Their debut novel, Dane Morris: Rise and Fall of an Ubermensch, or; An Intellectual Derp-Derp, will be published in time for Christmas. It’s about angry young men getting exploited by a cynical media.

      Having said that, please consider getting all your friends to buy this book. Not only will it help some great charities, but it will make us all feel happy. And we need it. Thank you in advance.

      For Selma

      Chapter One

      Volo dicere ad dominum tuum

      -Epitaph discovered in the

      ruins of Pompeii

      Raphael Baal knew he should have called in sick about ten minutes too late. No sooner had he said, You know what, lady, I don’t care, he knew what was coming: a trip to the office. An effete and impotent HR rep (effete and impotent even by HR standards) sat behind the haggard shift manager. The pair of them liked to imagine they were lawyers – hell, they even pretended to have gone to college – and Raphael was all too aware of what happened to people who laughed at the performance. Just nod. That simple. No sense sticking up for yourself in a corporate setting. Words like individual, and morality could only be used in stern reprimands over minor offenses. The major offenses were ignored. It wasn’t even worth trying to remind the two of them the woman who complained had spent the thirty minutes prior to Raphael’s outburst advocating for ethnic cleansing.

      As with most people in that position, they were only inclined to care when it financially benefited them, se Raphael tried not to care either. It certainly didn’t benefit him financially. He’s play nice. At work at least. No doubt the others in the office

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