Stop Worrying Grow Rich Expanded

Stop Worrying & Grow Rich
© Trevor Emdon 2008
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, we live in an age where disclaimers are required. So I will tell you that
whilst I sincerely believe in the principles within this book, I cannot guarantee your results - financially
or emotionally. This book is in NO WAY intended to substitute for professional help, financial or
emotional, so if you need it, please get it, and if you're already getting it, don't stop!
Legal: This book is copyright by Trevor Emdon. You do not have permission to reproduce it or pass it
on. You wouldn't like my lawyers, so please don't put this to the test!
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Stop Worrying And Grow Rich!

What you are about to read will have two major impacts on your life. It will
stop you worrying. And it will increase your wealth.
Those seem like bizarre claims, but now I’m going to make an even odder
one. Those two are inextricably linked. In fact, I’d go as far as to say that if
you truly desire to be rich then you cannot do it and worry also. Of course, in
saying that, I realise that the paradox is that you could start worrying about
worrying! Since that would clearly be self defeating, I’ll ensure that never
happens!
In common with all self help material, written, spoken or live, this must come
with a warning. Reading it and doing nothing else doesn’t make it work! In
fact it guarantees that it won’t work, and you’ll simply end up disappointed,
probably not for the first time in your life. Even if I was personally there with
you, I couldn’t do this for you!
There are instructions enclosed. Follow them and the two results promised in
the title will show up in your life as surely as night follows day. You may, of
course, be one of those people who likes to “prove” authors of this kind of
material wrong by ensuring that the results you say you want never do
actually show up in your life. If you are such a person and you run that
pattern of behaviour I can only say that the person who will suffer as a result
would be you, since you still won’t have what you (say you) want.
The astute among you will have noticed the brackets in that last sentence.
You see, you must be aware that there are many people who claim outwardly
and openly that they want to improve their lives but in fact they don’t really.
It’s not that they’re lying, it’s actually a fear of change. Some people get a lot
of needs met by always having something to moan about! Their friends
sympathise, their partner “understands them” and colleagues make
allowances for their shortcomings. To suddenly become successful, whether
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in business or love or any other realm of life, would be such a big change that
they couldn’t sustain it. How many big lottery winners have you heard of who
spend or lose all their millions within a short space of time and become poor
again? Ah, the relief of familiarity!
Even the brilliant and now very successful Anthony Robbins talks about how
he lost his first fortune when he was still very young – around twenty years of
age, I believe. Although he wasn’t conscious of it at the time, his wealth cost
him a lot in friendship. Of course, none of his peers, aged as they were
around nineteen to twenty-one, were millionaires. So they didn’t want Tony
hanging around while they were chasing girls – they wouldn’t have had a look
in! So they excluded him. Losing your friends is very painful. Of course,
Tony Robbins didn’t throw away all his money; he didn’t even realise what
was happening at the time. But bit by bit, he self sabotaged his own
businesses until they no longer worked and he went broke.
Tony’s story is also a great starting point for us, because it shows how a self
sabotaging pattern such as his can not only be made conscious, but it can
also be turned around. These days, Tony is, of course, not only a multi-
millionaire, but he has an incredible set of friends, and that has been the case
for many years now.
To knit these two ideas together I shall first take them one at a time, and then
you will easily see how when you achieve one, (stopping worrying), you will
easily be able to bring the other, (growing rich), about.
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1. What IS Worry?
Let’s take an analysis of worry as our starting point. Worry, quite simply, has
to be the most useless problem solving strategy ever created. You are faced
with a situation and you cannot in that moment see how to resolve it and so
you immediately resort to thinking of all the worst possible disasters that could
befall you! This is abject nonsense! Taken to its extreme you’d never get out
of bed in case there was something to trip over. In fact, you’d never have a
bed for fear it would collapse or the ceiling might fall on you in your sleep. We
would all live like Chicken Licken who feared the sky would fall on her head, if
memory serves!
Given the absurdity of worrying, why do so many people indulge in it? Even
organisations and governments do it, and billions of pounds or dollars of
taxpayers money is spent every year so that entire committees can worry on
our behalf!
One reason for doing it so much is that, in the face of a seemingly insoluble
situation, it gives the appearance of doing something. That appearance is
often not solely for the benefit of others, in fact, sometimes it isn’t for anyone
else’s benefit at all. It is actually for the person’s own supposed benefit, so
conditioned are we to think that we must solve all problems with our “brains” –
our intellects, in other words. Sometimes this is the worst possible thing we
could do, as you will see.
Whilst there are some problems that are indeed best solved with an
intellectual approach, many dilemmas do not lend themselves to this at all.
Let’s classify problems, shall we?
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Classifying The Problem
Let’s take a scientific problem. Perhaps a well known example is that of

Edison’s invention of the electric light bulb. According to the many reports of
this, Edison made around a thousand attempts at finding a substance that
would work. After therefore about nine hundred and ninety nine “failed”
efforts, Edison was apparently asked how he felt about so many failures. His
legendary reply was that he had had no failures, but that he had merely found
nine hundred and ninety nine ways that didn’t work! There are many lessons
we can learn from this approach to what was self evidently eventual success,
but for now just imagine how differently things might have turned out if Edison
had applied worry to the problem!
“Oh, my goodness,” he might have thought, “what if I never find a way to

make an electric light bulb? What will become of me? What about my
reputation? What about all the time and money I’d have wasted on this stupid
project? I’d better give up!”
I’ve never heard of anyone who has advocated worry as a strategy for
achieving anything. No one who does it seems to enjoy it, and nobody, so far
as I know, has ever claimed that it works in the resolution of problems.
So, some problems, such as Edison’s, are purely scientific. The fact that
Edison seems to have held in his mind the absolute certainty that a way to
make a light bulb would ultimately be found is to his eternal credit, but we can
probably assume that his life would not have been changed for the worse very
much if he had never found a way to do it.
Other problems, however, have a completely different nature. They have a

huge emotional component; indeed some are entirely emotional.
Let’s suppose you are suddenly confronted with a major expense and you
don’t know how you are going to pay the bill. On the face of it, this may seem
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to be a “black and white” situation. Either you will come up with the money or
you won’t. In order to even begin worrying about it, we can safely assume
that from where you are right now you cannot see a way to generate the
funds. We’ll imagine that the bill is ten thousand, (you fill in the currency), and
that you only earn one thousand thingies a month, all of which is taken up with
feeding your family and paying your mortgage and other bills. With no
savings either, you just aren’t going to be able to pay ten thousand thingies,
are you?
So you worry. “Oh, my gosh, what am I going to do?”
First, notice that the question itself contains the presupposition that the
solution to the problem lies in the doing of something, which is not
necessarily the case!
Secondly, the only answer your poor benighted subconscious can possibly
come up with in that scenario is, “Well, there’s nothing you can do.” The
maths simply doesn’t work out – and since maths is very definitely a scientific
issue, I think we can safely say that attempting to solve this problem with
science is absolutely not going to work!
You are going to have to come up with a completely different approach and to
do that we’ll start by re-classifying the problem. This is, as we’ve just
demonstrated, not a problem you can solve with science. Therefore your
intellect is not the best tool to try to fix it with, is it? If your watch was broken
but the only tool you had in the house was a massive heavy hammer, would
you try to fix your tiny timepiece with that?
I think not!
What else can you use to fix the ten-thousand-thingy bill problem?
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Your heart, that’s what! You can fix it emotionally, because that’s what this
kind of problem is – an emotional one! In fact, most problems you are likely to
come across or deal with in your personal life will fall into this category.
Let’s just start thinking outside the box here a little. We haven’t specified what
the imaginary bill is for, but let’s say it’s to pay taxes you’d overlooked, so it’s
pretty serious. Let’s consider all the options.
You could simply not pay it and go to jail. Not a desirable outcome, but at
least you’ve given it house room in your head. You’ve decided against that
one, so move on.
You can negotiate with the tax authorities to see how much time they’ll give
you to pay. Let’s assume it’s not going to be very long, so saving the money
out of your thousand a month isn’t an option.
You could borrow the money. Hmm, there’s more of a maybe in here. But
you’d have to come up with the collateral, and you’d still have to repay it, so
all you’d really buy is more time and quite a lot of interest. You could decide
to keep that one on the back burner.
You could create the money.
Aha! Now how could you do that?
Ten thousand thingies is only one thousand customers paying you ten
thingies for something. Maybe you could write a little book to sell on the
internet! (Like this one! Don’t copy mine though – that’s illegal and highly
immoral!) If you know something other people don’t, you could have a winner
there. Let’s face it, if Colonel Sanders could sell a fried chicken recipe that
became world famous and made him a millionaire when he was a pensioner,
you can come up with something!
Sell things on Ebay.
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Sing in the street.
Read Tarot cards.
Bake cakes for weddings or celebrations.
Halve your car’s fuel bill by taking some neighbour’s kids to school and
sharing the cost. If this saved you a hundred thingies a month, you could at
least offer that to the tax man!
Read stories to kids or blind people.
Babysit.
Write articles for local magazines and sell them.
Take up modelling, (with or without your clothes on – you decide!)
Use your digital camera to record magic moments for people – kids’ birthday
parties, christenings, anything.
I’m making these up as I go along, but it’s taken me less than two minutes to
think of those ideas. If you’re committed to worrying you will have dismissed
every one of them. But they are all possible solutions, and they came from
the notion of deciding to give house room in your head to the possibility that
you can come up with the money.
And that’s still in the doing mode!
In a moment or two, I’m going to show you a much more radical mode than
that, which is the intention mode, but right now that will take you so far outside
your comfort zone that you’d stop reading, so before going on to that, let me
take you through a completely different worry scenario, but one that is
uncomfortably common.
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Let’s imagine that you suspect your partner is being unfaithful.
There are only two possible truths here aren’t there? Either she is being
unfaithful or she isn’t! Should your suspicions prove to be unfounded you
could put yourself and your relationship through some terrible distress while
you worry about it. But what if you are right?
Let’s consider your options.
You could ignore it.
You could confront her with your discovery.
You could discuss the possibility of an open relationship.
You could take responsibility and ask yourself what part you have played in
letting things get to this stage?
You can begin some soul searching and ask yourself if you are truly in love.
You could seek out relationship counselling.
You could forgive her. (You needn’t even tell her that you know!)
You could thank your lucky stars that you have the opportunity to make a new
start.
Once again, these are all things you could do. They won’t necessarily solve
the problem, but then in actual fact, we haven’t really defined the problem!
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2. What the Problem Really Is.
If you consider the second scenario, (worrying that your partner is being
unfaithful), you will understand what I am now going to explain to you.
You see, the problem is not whether or not your partner is cheating on you.
The problem is that you feel bad.
Consider the first example – the bill you can’t pay. Some people are faced
with situations like that and don’t bat an eyelid. I have a friend who is just like
that. When he needs extra money he simply smiles, (something he does a
lot), and says the money will show up. It always does – usually in vast
quantities. He quite simply does not understand the concept of worry
because he understands that his greatest resource is himself.
He realises that he can always do something that will make money, but the
generator that makes that possible is that he is always happy. Intuitively he
understands that his way of being attracts opportunity, ideas and all kinds of
good fortune!
The real problem, regardless of what we find to worry about, is that most of us
let the tail wag the dog. We have fallen for the commonly held myth that when
all our problems go away we can finally be happy.
I’m here to tell you, nothing could be further from the truth.
That is like saying that when all disease goes away, then you’ll be healthy.
Just as health is your natural physical state, so happiness is your natural

psychological state!
When did you ever see an unhappy newborn baby? And treated with love
and kindness, children stay that way. Witness any toddler’s birthday party,
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and completely without the aid of drugs, alcohol or tobacco, they will have a
whale of a time.
We have to learn to be unhappy. We have to learn to worry!
I have a question for you. Right now, in this very exact moment as you
read this, do you have any problems?
Presumably, since you are able to spend time reading, your basic needs are
taken care of. You are no doubt warm enough, you have clothes to wear and
food in your belly. Obviously I cannot guess every detail of your
circumstances, but you probably have some means of income, and you
probably have friends and at least one person who loves you.
In order to start worrying you have to make a disaster movie in your head!
Then you will make yourself feel bad. Then you will be able to claim you have
a problem and you’ll be able to find hundreds of like minded people who feel
like you do, and you can all be miserable together. Bully for you! What a
crazy way to live!
Instead of that, you could discover how to resolve any problem, (by never
letting it become such a thing in the first place), and become an inspiration to
others and make the world a better place.
Now, with all of that said, are you ready to discover how to solve any problem
by using intention? Make sure you understand all I’ve said so far, because if
you don’t what follows will blow your mind. (It blew mine when I first
discovered it, and it still does! But it works and that’s all that counts).
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3. How To Solve Any Problem With The Power Of Intention.
Let’s return to our two scenarios, which I hope you’ll agree are typical of the
things folks find to worry about. We’ll start with the big bill.
I’m not suggesting that you become Pollyanna-ish about this and behave as if
the situation didn’t exist. You owe money and it needs to be paid. That’s the
physical reality in that situation. Firstly, realise that the money to pay it exists
many millions of times over. It’s just that not all of it is in your bank account
yet!
Secondly, understand where the physical world comes from. It comes from
energy – in fact it is energy. And you, as a human being, can control the
energy you generate. You know how you are controlling it because you have
a very sophisticated feedback system. It’s called “feelings.” Traditionally,
you’d probably say, “I’m in a bad mood because I don’t have the money to pay
my tax bill,” as if the bill had responsibility for your mood.
The bill is neutral. It didn’t set out to make you feel bad, good or anything
else. It’s just a bill. How you process the information that it exists is down to
you.
Thirdly, and as a by the way for the moment, you will also come to understand
that in some way you attracted that bill and the whole situation into your life!
This is the controversial bit, and some people hate it when they’re told this,
but I’m not telling you in order to make you feel bad. It’s vital that you
understand the difference between “blame” and “responsibility.” Blame is just
a stick to beat yourself up with, and will only add to your misery.
Responsibility means you’re able to respond and therefore you can take
charge of the situation and you can orchestrate the change required. But if
you can do that, then you must have brought it into being in the first place!
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You can’t have it that you attracted all of the good stuff, whilst the not-so-good
was nothing to do with you! It’s all or nothing where the Law of Attraction is
concerned!
Finally, get this. All change happens from within. No exceptions. And that
includes your “external” circumstances.
No one has any difficulty getting their head around the notion that if you want
to stop biting your nails, for example, that you need to change something
inside yourself. But when it comes to your bank balance or the way your lover
behaves, well that would be down to some kind of luck, good or bad, right?
Wrong!
Think about this for a second. When you have a thought or a feeling or
experience a shift in your mood, for instance, you have no problem with the
idea that those are purely internal, subjective experiences, do you? No one
else can experience your hunger or your happiness, can they? But when you
look at an object, let’s say your kitchen table, the image of that object is
actually located firstly on the retinas of your eyes. But you don’t experience it
there. You have the very “real” experience of that table being well and truly
outside of yourself, and that can be verified by the fact that other people can
see it too.
But all we actually have there is a “personal reality” and a “shared reality.” If
we could see through the eyes of a fly, we’d be convinced that there were
multiple tables there, whilst a dog would tell you it had no colour, but boy does
it smell interesting! Reality, all of it, is in the mind of the beholder!
Scientists are still working on the problem of figuring out how the brain
decides that some things are “internal” whilst others are “external.” We take it
for granted, but it’s not as obvious, and certainly not as “real” as you might
think.
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Back to our big tax bill. I’m not for one moment suggesting that you should
jump for joy at having received it. But you could start jumping about with
grateful thanks for having the wherewithal to sort it out. You may not have the
physical cash right now, but you do have your health, your mind, your skills,
your qualifications, your … everything you need in our incredible modern
world filled with more opportunities than you could ever imagine to turn that
situation around. You have the ability to respond!
Put yourself in that positive frame of mind in the first place. But you need to
go beyond positive thinking which is great, but is little better than hoping or
wishing by itself.
Next you need to feel the satisfaction of having paid it off. Feel the relief, the
joy. Mentally celebrate. Visualise yourself with a positive bank balance.
As you do this, you’ll probably notice some resistance as your mind says, “Oh
yeah, but I know it’s not true. It isn’t real.”
Hmmm. Where did we say reality was located, just remind me?
We are so conditioned to believe that what we perceive with our five senses is
physical reality. It isn’t. It’s a feedback loop. What you see and hear now is
actually a “recording” of what you brought into being yesterday! The real
“now” is whatever you are creating in your mind and you won’t see that until
tomorrow. (I’m using “yesterday” and “tomorrow” figuratively – don’t hold me
to those exact time frames! Some things are the result of mental processes
you started years ago).
Here’s the kicker. If you believe that what you perceive now is reality, you’ll
go on creating more of the same forever and ever amen, and your world will
never change much.
Look, there was a guy called Mr. Wright whose lymphatic cancer was so
advanced that he was not expected to live for the weekend. He had tumours
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in his armpits, groin and other places you can’t see, the size of oranges. He
begged his doctor for a new wonder drug he’d heard about. The doctor was
reluctant to give him the very expensive new drug because he knew that a
patient needed at least a three month life expectancy for it to take effect. But
Mr. Wright won the argument.
When the physician returned to work on Monday, fully expecting to hear that
Mr. Wright had passed away, he was astonished to find him out of bed and
tumour free. He told the doctor that the tumours had melted like snowballs on
a furnace!
He was discharged home and remained perfectly healthy until, tragically,

reports were issued about the new drug that declared it useless. Mr. Wright’s
tumours returned overnight and he died two days later.
That’s a true and verifiable story.
You and I both know there are plenty more like it. They are not explainable by
the model of physical reality that we generally accept.
Quantum physics already has discovered that matter only appears as physical
matter when it’s observed – in other words, when there is a conscious entity
around. Otherwise, it’s pure energy, without form. The implications of this are
mind blowing, as I said earlier, but they are also the most exciting news you’re
likely to get this lifetime! It means that the primary force behind the creation of
the universe is consciousness, and guess what? You have control over your
consciousness! You, as a human being, can decide what to think and how to
feel!
Your thoughts, which give rise to feelings, set up a resonance, a vibration, just
like a tuning fork would, or maybe a radio frequency is a better analogy. If you
want to listen to jazz, don’t tune in to a news station! When you get on the
vibrational wavelength that matches what you desire, you “tune that into your
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life” and your world will fill with jazz, or money, or love … or whatever you
desire!
So focus on the solution, not the problem. Right now, you don’t have to know
what that solution is, you just have to focus on believing that you’re going to
find one and it’s going to feel very good! Just call the tax office and say, “No
problem. I’m going to figure this out. I’ll get back to you in a couple of days.”
And trust and believe that the answer’s going to show up, like you trust and
believe that when you place an order with amazon.com they’re going to
deliver!
And now, act from joy. Follow hunches. If you suddenly think of a friend you
haven’t heard from in years, (and it feels good to call them), call them! Walk
down streets you haven’t explored before – just because it feels good.
Play feel-good music and watch feel-good movies. Feel good, feel good, feel
good. That’s all you have to do. The answer will show up, but not when
you’re worrying it won’t. When you feel good, it will. It’s that simple.
You may have noticed there is a simple rule at work here:
FEEL GOOD FIRST!
Nothing is more important than that. As you feel good, good ideas will
spontaneously occur to you. Opportunities will arise before your very eyes!
“Coincidences” will happen like miracles. Miracles will happen full stop!
But you must not play the “when/then” game, which states, “When such-and-
such happens, then I’ll feel good.” That is the tail wagging the dog.
It takes time to trust it for some people. That’s understandable because it flies
in the face of what most of us have been taught all our lives. Unless you are
very unusual, most of your friends and family will not believe what I’m telling
you. (Actually, they’ll say they don’t believe in it, as if it was fairies or Santa
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Claus). At this stage all I can ask you to do is to look at them and ask yourself
how happy and fulfilled in their lives they are. If you can truly say that any of
them are, then by all means ask them what their internal beliefs are about
their personal success and model it!
Another element of resistance to taking this way of living on board is the fear
of loss of acceptance by your loved ones. Listen, take my very serious advice
on this. Don’t tell anyone what you’re doing until it starts working. When it
does, they’ll ask you how you did it! This, your personal beliefs, should be
more personal than your sex life or your income! It’s between you and you, so
keep it that way!
The Unfaithful Lover Scenario
So far, I’ve concentrated on the imaginary tax bill to get the message across,
but I promised I’d deal with the worry that your lover is being unfaithful too.
The principles are exactly the same, of course. You are simply going to feel
good first and take it from there. Understand, I’m not suggesting you feel
good about whatever is happening. I’m simply instructing you to find a way to
feel good first. You need to put yourself in a resourceful state to deal with any
problem, and worry, anxiety and fear are simply not such states.
Now, with this particular scenario, I’m suggesting that you don’t even know if
it’s happening. You’re just torturing yourself with the possibility that it might
be! Let me assure you of one thing right up front: keep dwelling on it and it
surely will! Never mind the Law Of Attraction; it’s not rocket science to see
that insecurity and jealousy are deeply unattractive behaviours that sooner or
later will drive the most devoted lover to distraction, and quite possibly into the
arms of someone else. Besides all of that, there’s something in hypnosis
called “embedded commands.” (Quite apt in the circumstances!) If you
constantly question your lover about whether she or he is sleeping with
someone else, by definition you put the idea of sleeping with someone else
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into their mind! As you become increasingly insecure, the more likely that is
going to seem like an attractive proposition to them!
So what’s the solution?
Change your focus! Ask yourself questions like these, (after you’ve put
yourself in a feel-good state of course):
What’s great about my lover?

What’s sexy about her/him?
How much joy did she bring me today?
(Of course, if you find these questions difficult to answer, then maybe it is time
to move on!)
The point is, you can choose what you focus on! Focus on what you’re
grateful for, what you love and what you enjoy, and realise that this other
person is a human being with the same basic needs as you: to be loved and
respected for whoever they are, and to be enjoyed and acknowledged for their
own special brand of individuality that they bring to the world and especially to
you.
By doing all of this, you will once again return to radiating the energy of love to
them, and once that starts to flow so that they feel it, (which means you have
to genuinely feel it first), there’s no way on this Earth that they’d be thinking of
leaving you, because being with you will be such a joyful experience every
time!
Leave ‘em wanting more, not less!
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4. The Top Questions You MUST Ask Yourself To Bring Money

Pouring In
I am often asked where I get all my ideas from. This must be one of the most
common questions any writer, musician, comedian or artist of any kind is
asked.
It's a very confusing question because of course, no one has really any idea
where their ideas come from! "From life" is the kind of answer you'll get, and
it's not particularly helpful if you want to have a lot more ideas yourself is it?
Life is happening to everyone, so how come so and so gets more ideas than I
do?
Let's be clear: for the purposes of this book, at any rate, the ideas you want
are for the one and only outcome of bringing you money - lots of it!
So how do you get money making ideas?
Well, you should have figured out by now that you're asking the wrong
question! (I hope you've read the rest of this book and didn't just skip to this
page!)
First you have to decide how to be!
Imagine how ridiculous it would be trying to get ideas if the prime thought in
your head is, "Geeze, I'll never be able to do this!" or something like that!
So the first question you must ask yourself, (and don't move onto step two
until you've answered correctly) is:
How am I going to be?
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You can be playful or creative or fun or brilliant or in genius mode, or just

ingenious or something like that.
But you absolutely cannot be miserable, pessimistic, worried, scared, have

zero confidence, depressed, angry ... or any such negative nonsense! You
will not get where you want to be from a state like that!
So there might need to be a question 1a, (in case of being in a negative place
when you start out), which is:
How can I change my negative mood/state to a positive and resourceful

one right now?
Yes, you can change your state in a flash!
Think of the friend who makes you laugh the most.
Remember a great sexy moment!
Bring to mind your favourite childhood superhero and imagine you are him or
her - complete with external underwear if need be! Walk, move and speak
like them - even if just for twenty seconds! They would never be defeated!
Remember a time when you were applauded.
Remember a moment when you were profusely thanked.
Think of a time you received a really heartfelt hug.
Are you getting it yet?
You can choose what to think about, and the moment you do that you will
change the way you feel!
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When you've found something that works, do it three or four or five times until
it sticks and the old negative mood won't come back. The whole process from
start to finish should take you no more than three minutes. (Actually I can do
this in twenty or thirty seconds now - but hey, I'm the author so I should be
better than you at this stuff! Just kidding).
Okay, next!
Now you're in a positive state, so does that mean your brain is suddenly going
to fill up with brilliant ideas that will make you a fortune?
Sadly, I can't guarantee that that will be the case.
You need to take a couple more steps first.
How To Get People To Part With Their Money - And Give It To

You!
In order for people to part with money, they like to feel, generally, that they're
getting value. No one wants to feel ripped off! I did once have a girlfriend
who gave a beggar quite a lot of her loose change when he asked. She did it
with grace and a smile and with no hesitation.
I was somewhat surprised at the time, since I knew she didn't have a lot of
money, and I asked her about it. What she said was quite stunning and
possibly to this day one of the wisest comments about how money can be
used I've ever heard.
She said, "He gave me a gift. It was a perfectly fair exchange."
I pointed out that he had directly asked her for money and that I hadn't noticed
anything changing hands in her direction.
21
"But he made me feel generous," she explained. "Now he feels good and I
feel good. What's the problem?"
It's a great story. She truly did not feel ripped off and I was very proud of her -
and momentarily slightly ashamed of myself, but the lesson has stayed with
me ever since.
However, it has to be said that most of us do not generally see exchange of

money in this way - we want some goods or service in return for our outlay,
and we want it to feel like it was worth the spend.
So if you are going to get people to part with their hard earned cash, it would
help if you knew what they wanted to begin with, wouldn't it?
Well, I'm going to tell you, because it's a cinch. It's the reason you're reading
this book and the reason you paid money for it.
Whatever people buy, from food to holidays, from clothes to Ferraris, they do
it for one simple almighty reason.
They want to feel good.
Food - like general groceries - ends their hunger. If it's for storage in their
larder it might also have the effect of temporarily giving them a sense of
security - they aren't going to starve.
Clothes at their most basic make people warm. But then there's the fashion
element to clothing, not to mention the sexy element, the status symbol
element ... all about feelings!
Holidays are pretty obvious. Entertainment of any kind is about distracting

themselves from the worries or the drudgeries of their daily lives so that they
can briefly feel good!
22
There is not one product or industry you can name where people exchange
money for something unless it makes them feel good.
That's what we're about and that's what life is for.
We are living in a time when we have so many ways to make us feel good that
there really should be no more need for any more products. But fortunately
for us, and unfortunately for millions of folks out there, many people are so
stuck on looking at all the ways they haven't yet got, can't afford, failed to
achieve or whatever that they make themselves feel bad all over again.
They've forgotten that they've got healthy bodies, beautiful homes, more
choice of what to eat than all the kings and queens of history put together ever
had ... I could go on.
So people have plenty of ways to feel good already, but they spend huge
amounts of time feeling bad - as in worrying - so now all you need to do is to
identify a particular "headache" and come up with the right "aspirin" and you're
on the trail of a winner!
Now let's get more specific about what people want and you'll see how you
can start generating unlimited ideas out of these simple principles!
There are just six basic things that all humans want and need.
Let's run through the list quickly first, and then I'm going to help you to
generate some spectacular ideas about how you - that is specifically you and
no other individual on this planet - can put it into action so people will start
showering you with more money than you ever dreamed of!
Ready?
Okay.
23
The Six Things All Humans Need.
These needs are universal. That is to say they apply to all people from all
cultures for all time. They are possibly applicable to most other species too,
(at least three of them would be), but I'd dare to say that once you know these
you'll understand what it fundamentally is to be human.
And the use of that, from a money making perspective, is that you'll be able to
look at anyone through this "lens" I'm about to give you and without too much
fuss or bother, you'll be able to figure out which of their needs is most lacking.
All you have to do then is figure out how to restore balance in that area for
them, and Bingo! They'll be beating your door down to get some of whatever
you've got!
So, without further ado, let's look at the list.
First up is certainty. Everyone needs a level of this. You might remember

the kindergarten story of "Chicken Licken" (sometimes called "Chicken Little")
who thought that the sky was going to fall on her head. This total lack of
certainty dominated her life and she was unable to function.
Fortunately, most of us are not quite as frantic as the fictional chicken, but to a
greater or lesser degree, we like to know that things will have a certain order
to them. Some people like to know when pay day is, whilst others are more
free and easy about that. If you're really stuck on knowing when pay day is,
you'd better not become self employed!
Some people like to know it's always fish on Fridays. Again, others are more
adventurous with their diet.
But these are trivial compared to some things. For instance, if you are
someone who has trouble with physical risk taking, you aren't likely to join the
local sky diving club or jump at the chance to win a snow boarding holiday!
Not too much of a problem for most people probably, but if you happened to
24
be married to someone who loves those kinds of opportunities you might have
your work cut out in terms of sorting your relationship, or in re-evaluating your
own comfort zone!
There is, however, a problem with certainty. Too much of it becomes boring!
We all have seen comedy sketches about dull accountants, or people who
follow the same routine year in and year out. Their lives may be very safe, but
frankly, they're not having much of a life at all! That, to my mind, qualifies as
marking time til the grave, and if life is a flat line, guess what you get when
you're dead?
I once heard of a billionaire who got depressed. The problem was, the guy
had everything. With several beautiful homes around the world, more money
than he could ever spend and a doting family to boot, what did he need to get
out of bed for? That guy had to find some new challenges, (which I gather he
did), but it's a serious problem.
Which brings us neatly to the next universal need - variety.
We need change and challenge. Think about this: If Darwin's theory of

"survival of the fittest" is correct, (and there's no reason to suppose it isn't),
then why did we humans bother to leave the caves? We don't see other
creatures evolving in that way, do we? My cat has yet to invent fire, and I
think felines have been around quite a while!
So why? My hypothesis is that we can't help it. If a cave person saw a log
rolling down a hill, he or she would not have been able to help having some
thought like, "Hmmm. That gives me an idea...!" (Darwin doesn't explain this
part as far as I know).
So wheels are invented, and from there a whole host of other things - good or
bad is not the issue here - because we actually enjoy creating and
experimenting! Perhaps we could give it a more primitive but possibly more
accurate name: we like playing.
25
Our play changes things. No change is dull, some change is interesting. Too
much change is scary and so we go back to need 1!
The next universal need is the need for acknowledgement.
We all have a sense of identity and like to feel that individually we are
important. Whilst we may have been brought up "not to brag", we all feel
good when others tell us we've done something well or that we've been a
great help to someone in some way.
I'm not suggesting pouring so much honey over someone that they squirm
with embarrassment, but you'll see this principle at work in everything from
certificates of merit to company bonuses and incentive schemes. It's where
the desire to win comes from, and each of us would love to earn a "gold" at
something every now and then.
Of course, there are those who get too much "honey" poured on them -
sometimes it's more of a landslide! Take, for example big rock stars, movie
stars or top sports personalities. This can become a serious psychological
problem as the individual loses his or her sense of who they really are, and
can feel as though the only reason anyone wants them is for what they can
do, not for the person within. Possibly one of the most poignant and powerful
examples of the tragedy this can bring is the story of Elvis Presley.
There is, therefore, an underlying universal need - the fourth of the six - which
is the need for love.
Well, you probably guessed that one! If you had to pick any one of the six
needs that can cause more problems than any other, though, it's this one.
Firstly, people on the whole don't love themselves. But they crave the
unconditional love of a partner, and often demand it from their children! It's
like passing on a gift to someone else that you personally thought was rather
tacky or undesirable! Why would you give someone you care about
26
something you don't personally like? And yet there are people all over the
world doing this every day! The "gift" is their own self, which is often disliked
for its appearance not to mention many characteristics!
Secondly, many people don't know how to receive love. This is related to
what I've just said. They feel unworthy, with the result that they end up
rejecting relationship after relationship, often without consciously knowing
why.
Thirdly, you won't be surprised to learn, many people don't really know how to
give love either. Balancing the needs of another with those of your own is not
an easy task! It's as though everyone is secretly saying, "I love you
unconditionally - except when you demand unconditional love from me!" We
all want our own way, don't we?
I'll reveal the rather surprising solution to this problem towards the end of the
book!
Let's look at the last two universal needs.
The first of these is the need to grow. We all need to do this - it's part of that
need for variety that I mentioned earlier. Stagnation is not only undesirable,
it's actually not an option! Time won't stand still, and neither can you. One of
the worst tortures, (apparently), is that of total sensory deprivation. The idea
of doing absolutely nothing is not just boring - it's very painful!
We love new information, new entertainment, new adventures. The nature of

these will vary from person to person, but quite simply if growth is stunted or
stopped, the person will actually start to die. This really is the choice between
choosing life or choosing death.
Finally, the sixth need is the need to put something back. This, when it's
well done, can meet all of the other needs. It can make you feel certain of
27
who you are and what you're doing, gain you acknowledgement, earn you real
love, supply endless variety and cause you to grow every day.
Think of the eulogies people make at funerals. What do individuals get

remembered for? For their kind deeds, for their smile, for generosity, for
politeness, for helpfulness ... don't they? I've never heard of a eulogy where
the departed was acknowledged for the things most of us worry about in life -
the size of their waistline or how much wealth they accumulated!
Andrew Carnegie was one of the richest men of all time, but what he'll be
remembered for is his philanthropy, not his wealth!
You can bet your last dollar that people who live this way feel fantastic too! It
feels great to help people and have them thank you, whether it's with words, a
Christmas card or a financial reward.
How To Use The Six Needs.
Now you know what people want, (including you, by the way!), you can start to
apply this knowledge to change your life and your fortunes. I am not the first
to point out that if you can make other people feel good, or help them get
wealthy, they will reward you with more good fortune - including money - than
you could ever imagine!
In case it hadn't occurred to you, allow me to point out that of the universal
needs above, none is physical. Of course, everyone needs to eat, but studies
have shown that babies who are unloved fail to thrive despite being fed
adequately. Some even die!
I have not included the need for water, air or food because although those are
clearly vital needs for life, they are not exclusively human needs. To feel
human, and to have a meaningful and fulfilling life it is those six that must be
met.
28
Interestingly, the need for money is not there! In fact, there is no need for
money, except that it may help to meet some of the other needs sometimes.
You can probably already see that an excess of money could confuse a
person as an over-acknowledgement, leaving them feeling empty when it
comes to love! I suspect that Robbie Williams, (the singer), has had to battle
with this at times, for example.
What people want - regardless of what they say they want - is to feel better.
They want more out of life because that makes them feel they're growing.
They want promotion because that enables them to contribute more and be
acknowledged more, (with congratulations cards and a fatter pay cheque!).
Why would you want a Porsche when a Ford will do? Because a Porsche
feels better, that's why! Both will get you from A to B.
Having drummed that into your head, you can now start asking yourself some
amazingly important questions:
1. What can I do that would give people more certainty?

2. What can I do that will give people more variety?
3. What can I do that will give people more acknowledgement?
4. What can I do that will give people more love?
5. What can I do that will give people more growth?
6. What can I do that will give people more ways to put something
back?
As you let your mind wander creatively over those questions, ideas will pop
into your head that will meet more than one of those - which of course is
great!
In case it had escaped your attention, as you answer these, you'll find that you
are meeting your own needs too! It's a true win-win situation.
29
Let's take a moment to look at those questions and how you can answer
them. Obviously, I can't answer them for you because they'd be my answers!
Let me start with an example of that!
Q. What can I do that would give people more certainty?

A. I can write a book that will help people to feel they're more in
control of their financial destiny!
Q. What can I do that will give people more variety?

A. I can give people ideas about how they can earn money doing
more of what they love!
Are you starting to get the idea? (I hope so, because you're reading my
answers!)
I have other talents too. I can play the acoustic guitar rather well. I love it,
and music gives people pleasure, so I might look in that area for more ideas
for myself.
What do you love to do that other people love too? Now, don't dismiss your
skills with, "Oh, not that! Anyone can do that!"
Not like you, they can't. And maybe they wouldn't want to, and maybe they
wouldn't think of it.
My own wife gets paid a fabulous hourly rate for doing a neighbour's ironing -
because she loves to do it and she is very willing and happy about ironing!
It's not clear to us why this very nice couple don't do their own ironing, but it's
clearly a win-win. On the other hand, if my wife is ever sick, I don't think those
neighbours will ask me to step in - I hate ironing!
Now, I don't want to take you too far down the track of "what can I do?"
because the message of this book - and of the whole of the teachings of
anything even remotely related to the "law of attraction" is feel good first!
30
Feelings Must Come First!
I've said it before, and I may say it again before I'm finished here, but you
must put feelings first!
If you are starting from a place of "I'm desperate for money, what can I do?"
you'll fall flat on your face! Believe me, I know - I've done it countless times!
It took me years to get my head around this, so please, spare yourself
needless wasted time, and get this right now.
You must start with feeling good! "What do I love to do?" is a better question
than "What must I do to get some cash?"
Even better, in my view, is to start with reminding yourself that you are
resourceful. There is no one alive who is not resourceful! Everyone knows at
least one way to make someone smile. Everyone can think of at least one
thing they can do that at least one other person doesn't like to do - whether it's
the shopping, the gardening, the washing up or even the dreaded ironing!
Some people paint pictures, others bake cakes. Some people sing songs,
others wash dogs or cars. Some people have a nice speaking voice. (Do you
know any children or blind people that would love to hear you read aloud?)
Some people can tell jokes, others can explain politics or Einstein's theories
so that even a child can understand. Some people can run fast, others love a
long walk.
If you are still on your sofa declaring that all you love to do is sit around
watching television or playing computer games, then I'm sorry, but you're
lying. You're not lying to me, you're lying to yourself.
You are effectively saying that nothing inspires you, and that is because you
don't think anyone would want you for any reason.
31
This is a very sad state of affairs, and perhaps the first thing to say to you
about that is: you're not alone.
That doesn't make it all right though.
I'm going to offer you a quick fix here, which if you're willing to play along with
me, will work. However, if you're about to toss this book aside in disgust at
the thought that you might be doing something in the next few minutes, please
get help. This is only a book. I can't be there with you, so please, if you've
read this far you must want something more, so pick up the phone and call a
counsellor or someone who can help.
Okay, ready for the quick fix? (Quick doesn't mean the results are temporary
by the way. If you do this a few times, you will dramatically change your life -
I'm not kidding!)
1. Change your body language! Do it now. Sit up straight. Breathe

a little deeper. Uncross your legs or arms.
2. Think of a time when you felt acknowledged. Maybe someone

thanked you, (no matter for how small a reason), perhaps someone
attractive noticed you or smiled at you. Possibly you received an
unexpected gift or thank you card. It doesn't matter if it was twenty
years ago or twenty seconds - just let it come to mind.
3. Let the good feeling grow for at least twenty seconds.

4. Think of a time you had fun. Then think of a time you felt proud.
Then think of a time you felt loving. Then think of a time you did
something good for someone. Just keep flooding your brain with good
memories and feelings for up to two minutes.
5. Now get up and make a phone call to someone and ask them if
there's anything they'd like you to do in the next couple of days!
32
What? Number 5 is outside your comfort zone?
Well, you have a choice then. Carry on with your relationship with the
sofa. (Remember the need for growth - and its alternative?)
Or change your relationship with life. Your life! Do it now.
The Surprising Solution To How To Love
This might not seem entirely appropriate in a book about how to attract
money, but actually I believe it's key to your success.
To remind you: I stated earlier that the conundrum in relationships is how to

give unconditional love when you want the same in return - and your needs
won't match!
The answer is: selfishness!
Yes, I'm advising you to be selfish - but not mean! Stick with me here - you'll
see what I mean.
Since money is the focus of this book, let's talk about it. Suppose you see a
documentary about poverty in Africa somewhere. This moves you to the core
and you decide you'd like to help. Maybe you want to build schools or a road
- something desperately needed over there.
Now, if you have a lot of money in the bank, you can start immediately to take
direct action, can't you?
But if you are scraping the barrel for every last penny just to feed yourself,
your desire to help will have to remain just that - a desire!
33
The same is true with emotions. We have this strange idea that we must put
everyone else first. I can assure you that is the way to burn out and the early
demise of most relationships.
It won't surprise you to learn that I love to write. So I might say to my wife, "I
need about six hours to do some writing over the next couple of days." That's
my need.
She will then tell me that she needs to go somewhere and wants me to go
with her - and we negotiate how to fit both in. I know that I'm getting my time
writing, and she gets her outing.
I would not say to her, "Of course, honey, if you want to go out, my writing can
wait," nor would she say, "Oh, my going out isn't important. Write away!"
That way leads to resentment. By both stating our needs, we can support
each other.
The key is to be aware of, and not afraid to state, your own needs. The other
person does the same and you collaborate rather than compete. The same
works with dealing with children too, of course.
Not only that, but the same principle applies to work contracts - including
some of the win-win possibilities I've touched on in this book.
Ironically, selfishness, (that is knowing and acknowledging yourself first), is

probably one of the biggest keys to your success and to your sense of
fulfilment in life! It's obvious if you think about it!
You probably know people who thrive on their selflessness. This has almost
certainly evolved from an unhappy childhood where the only way to get
acknowledgement, let alone love, was when they did as they were told, which
meant doing something for some dominant other, (probably, though not
always, mother!)
34
So these people who will sometimes work themselves to the bone in the
service of others actually are programmed to get their six needs met by
endlessly being thanked for services rendered. They never look after
themselves because they don't know how to, and don't believe they are worth
it.
35
5. How Stopping Worrying Can Make You Rich.
I promised at the start of this little book to tell you how to grow rich by stopping
worrying. Although I haven’t spelled it out in so many words, I have actually
done it already. But now let me spell it out.
You cannot grow rich by focussing on not having money. This will always
keep you feeling bad, and you will continually create and recreate the situation
of having no money.
Here is what you need to understand and believe to grow rich:
• Reality is created from the inside out! You are not viewing reality in
the external world, it is a “recording” of previously held beliefs.
• Therefore, what you appear to have “now” is already out of date
news. Create a new reality in your head, and as long as you are
consistent about it, as sure as eggs are eggs it will show up in your
physical world.
• Therefore it is not lying to yourself to say you have it now.
• In any case, time is also an illusion. Just as all the possible
outcomes of a computer game are already encoded on the disc, so
everything and every possible combination of things, already exists
now. This includes your being rich.
• Worrying is just a word that means you are focussing on what
isn’t working. As long as you do that, the same things will keep on
not working!
• The antidote to worry is NOT to worry about worrying, or to beat
yourself up whenever you catch yourself doing it. It’s to make yourself
feel good. You can do this by remembering happy moments, recalling
a friend who makes you laugh, your favourite movie – anything.
Putting yourself in a good mood enables you to reach a resourceful
state where ideas, opportunities and even “lucky coincidences” will
happen.
36
• Trust and follow your intuition. As long as it feels good, do it. (Good
feelings include fun, adventure, excitement, creativity, passion and joy).
If it brings up a bad feeling, leave it alone. (Bad feelings include
anxiety, stress, guilt and any kind of fear).
• Expect the good stuff to show up in the same way as you’d expect
something you’ve ordered from a catalogue to turn up. A state of
excited expectation is what you want!
• Don’t impose time limits. You create everything now – but just as
when you order a brand new car there’ll be a delivery date – just hang
on in there – it’s coming. If you don’t trust that, you’ll be worrying that
maybe it isn’t coming, and then you’ll be right back where you started!
• Finally, don’t give yourself a hard time whenever you catch yourself
running the “old patterns” of thinking and feeling – especially worrying.
You’ve probably had a lifetime of training in dealing with “problems”
that way. Instead, realise how incredible it is that one “part” of you can
“catch” another “part” of you, and as soon as you do, use your pleasant
memories to flip yourself into a feel-good state. You can even laugh at
yourself: “There I go again!”
And that’s all there is to it!
If you don’t believe me, that’s fine. I can only suggest this: live for 30 days as
if everything I’ve said is true. What’s the worst that can happen? You’ll have
30 days of deliberately feeling good, so don’t expect sympathy about that!
In case you don’t feel willing to put in 30 days’ worth of work into changing
your life for the better forever, look around you and ask yourself how many
truly happy and fulfilled people you can see, and how many do you personally
know?
Life was not, I’m sure, meant to be a journey of struggle, fear and worry from
the cradle to the grave. If we had no challenges we’d be bored. And if we
had no dreams we’d be boring.
37
All the stories that make us feel good are the ones where the hero/ine fulfils
some dream or other. Think of “The Sound Of Music” or “It’s A Wonderful
Life” – stories that have touched the hearts of millions, and will no doubt
continue to do so for generations to come.
Live from joy, and joyful things will come to you.
I promise.
Over to you…!
You may also enjoy other "Master Success Secrets." As the
owner of this book you may pick up the other items in this
series from an exclusive website:
http://www.stopyworryingandgrowrich.com/reader-offer
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Stop Worrying & Grow Rich

© Trevor Emdon 2008

Stop Worrying And Grow Rich!

Classifying The Problem

Let’s take a scientific problem. Perhaps a well known example is that of

“Oh, my goodness,” he might have thought, “what if I never find a way to

Other problems, however, have a completely different nature. They have a

So you worry. “Oh, my gosh, what am I going to do?”

You could create the money.

Aha! Now how could you do that?

Sell things on Ebay.

Sing in the street.

Read Tarot cards.

Bake cakes for weddings or celebrations.

Read stories to kids or blind people.

Write articles for local magazines and sell them.

Take up modelling, (with or without your clothes on – you decide!)

And that’s still in the doing mode!

Let’s imagine that you suspect your partner is being unfaithful.

Let’s consider your options.

You could ignore it.

You could confront her with your discovery.

You could discuss the possibility of an open relationship.

You could seek out relationship counselling.

2. What the Problem Really Is.

Just as health is your natural physical state, so happiness is your natural

We have to learn to be unhappy. We have to learn to worry!

3. How To Solve Any Problem With The Power Of Intention.

He was discharged home and remained perfectly healthy until, tragically,

That’s a true and verifiable story.

You may have noticed there is a simple rule at work here:

FEEL GOOD FIRST!

The Unfaithful Lover Scenario

So what’s the solution?

What’s great about my lover?

Leave ‘em wanting more, not less!

4. The Top Questions You MUST Ask Yourself To Bring Money

So how do you get money making ideas?

First you have to decide how to be!

How am I going to be?

You can be playful or creative or fun or brilliant or in genius mode, or just

But you absolutely cannot be miserable, pessimistic, worried, scared, have

How can I change my negative mood/state to a positive and resourceful

Yes, you can change your state in a flash!

Think of the friend who makes you laugh the most.

Remember a great sexy moment!

Remember a time when you were applauded.

Remember a moment when you were profusely thanked.

Think of a time you received a really heartfelt hug.

Are you getting it yet?

Sadly, I can't guarantee that that will be the case.

You need to take a couple more steps first.

How To Get People To Part With Their Money - And Give It To

She said, "He gave me a gift. It was a perfectly fair exchange."

However, it has to be said that most of us do not generally see exchange of

They want to feel good.

Holidays are pretty obvious. Entertainment of any kind is about distracting

That's what we're about and that's what life is for.

The Six Things All Humans Need.

So, without further ado, let's look at the list.

First up is certainty. Everyone needs a level of this. You might remember

Which brings us neatly to the next universal need - variety.

We need change and challenge. Think about this: If Darwin's theory of