Roman1

OlivaRoman
ProfessorDitch
English113A
09December2014
AChosenGender
Manybelievethatsexandgenderarethesamething,thisbecomesataboowhenoneof
theoppositesexportraystheroleoftheopposinggender,havingmendowhatwomendoand
viseversa.Genderdoesnotmeansex,genderisaroleweplayinsocietyassexiswhatweare
bornwith.NighttoHisDay:TheSocialConstructionofGenderbyJudithLorberstatesour
societyweassumethatitsbredintoourgenes.Thewaymenandwomenaresupposedtoactin
certainways.AccordingtoFromWomen,Men,andSocietybyClaireRenzettiandDaniel
Curran,clothingplaysasignificantpartingendersocialization.Sciencehaslongdebated
whetherthischangeinsexisanaturalcauseorsociallyacquiredcause.Forone,parentsmaybe
thecauseforgender,forexample,peopletendtoresponddifferentlytonewbornsonthebasis
ofsex(RenzettiandCurran77).Whenitcomestodistinguishingthegenderofachildparents
arethebiggest,andsometimes,definingreason.
Menandwomenaresupposedtoactacertainwayaccordingtotheirsex.Societysees
menasmasculinewhilewomenareseenfeminine.Thesegenderdeterminationarebasedon
parents.Parentsaretheoneswhoteachtheirchildrencertainthingsaboutdressingandacting
becauseoftheirsex,butinsomecasestheresplaceswheresocietymayhavethreedifferent
typesofgender.JudithLorbersays,westernsocietieshaveonlytwogendersmenandwomen,
butothershavethreegendersmen,women,andberdachesorhijrasorxaniths(Lorber22).

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Berdaches,hijras,andxanithsaremaleswhodress,work,behave,andaretreatedwithrespectas
women.Theyarenotmennorwomen,butaremalewomen.TheyarealsoAfricanand
AmericanIndianwhohavegenderstatusasmanlyheartedwomen.Thesamethingasberdaches,
buttheyarecalledfemalewomen.Oneofmyfriendsmomisseeninsocietyseyesasa
femalewomenorinothersocietiesshesseenasaberdachesorhijrasorxaniths,becauseshe
works,ismarried,andparentsasaman.
ClaireRenzettiandDanielCurranstateparentstendtoresponddifferentlytonewborns
onthebasisofsexandhowclothingplaysasignificantpartingendersocialization.Whena
motherispregnantandassoonasshefindsoutwhatthesexofherbabyis,sheinstantlystarts
shoppingforclothes.Alsowithotherpeoplewhomarefriendswiththemotheraretheonesto
blameaswell.Forexample,ifthebabywasbornagirl,theywouldbuyherpink/floralclothing.
Notonlydoesthisinvolvetheirclothingbutitalsoinvolvestheirroomandtoys.Boyswouldnt
havethesameclothing,toys,androomasgirls,theywouldbedressedindarkorprimarycolors
blue,blackorred.Researchershavefoundthatparentstendtospeaktotheirgirlswithemotional
wordsandwithasoftandadelicatevoice,whileboysaretalkedtoharshandaggressive.Asthey
growup,girlsaresupposedtoplaywithdollsandlearnhowtocookwhileboysshouldbe
playingsportsorvideogamesandevengoingtoworkwiththeirfather.Parentsaretheoneswho
teachtheirkidstoactacertainwaysotheywillnotgetquestionsregardingtheirchildsex.Girls
aretaughttobewellmanneredandpoliteandboysaretaughttoworkhardandbeaggressive.In
middleschool,IdressedtomboyishandIdidntreallylikedressingingirlclothes.Iwasinband
atthattimeandmyparentswerenttooexcitedaboutthat,theywouldalwaystellmethatbeing
inbandwastooboyishandthatIshouldquit.Theyevensuggestedtojointhedrillteambecause

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thatiswhatagirlshouldbedoinginsteadofplayinganinstrumentandjoiningthedrumline.I
didntpaymuchattentiontothemandcontinuedtodowhatIloveddoing.Mymotherwouldbe
upsetatmefornotdressinginappropriateclothingtoschoolandmyfriendswouldusuallyget
awayfrommebecauseofthewayIdressed.InhighschoolIstilldressedthesame,butIrealized
Iwasgettingtiredofallthenegativecommentsandgettingteasedwitheveryday.Iendedup
shoppingandendedupbuyingclothesthatIneverconsideredonwearingandIstarteddressing
inskirts,shorts,anddressestomakesocietyhappy.
Menandwomenhavedifferentjobsaccordingtotheirsexcategory.Lorbersays,one
wayofchoosingpeopleforthedifferenttasksofsocietyisonthebasisofgender,race,
ethnicityascribermembershipinacategoryofpeople(Lorber21).Insomesocietiesitsnormal
formenandwomentoworktogether,butinthewesternsideitswrongandabitstrangetosome
people.Sometimesormostofthetimemenaretheoneswhogetpickedforthejobbecausetheir
big,strong,andbuff.Societyhasmanyexpectationsformen,theyneedtobestrong,
aggressive,andmasculinebecauseiftheyrenottheygetteased.Thisiswronginsomany
ways,societyshouldntmatteraboutpeoplessexandgender.Bothofmyparentswork,clean,
andcook,eventhenwhentheyneedhelpmysisterandIhelpthemweregirlsandworking,so
what?Peoplealwaysstareatuswhenwereoutworkingwithmachinesandnotthegoodlook
either.
Menandwomenbothhavedifferentstylesandeachofthempresentthemselves
differently.Notonlydoadults,teenagers,andtoddlershavedifferentclothing,butbabiesas
well.Whenyouwalkintoastoreyouseebabydiapers,somehaveunisexbutmostofthemhave
eitherflowersortrucksanditsobviouslygoingtowardsagirloraboy.AccordingtoRenzetti

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andCurran,clothingplaysasignificantpartingendersocializationintwoways.First,certain
typesofclothingencourageanddiscourageparticularbehaviororactivities.Second,by
informingothersaboutthesexofthechild,clothingsendsimplicitmessagesabouthowthechild
shouldbetreated(RenzettiandCurran77).Girlsaredressedinclothingthatshowmoreskin
andtheyhavevibrantclothingasforboystheyredressedindarkprimaryclothingred,blue,
andblack.AsIwasgrowingup,Irememberthatmymomwouldbabysitmynextdoorneighbor
hewasaboy.Therewassomethingdifferentwithhim,IrememberedgoingtotheroomandI
caughthimplayingwithmybarbiedollsandIthoughtofitbeingstrangebecausegrowingupI
wasntusedtoseeingthat.Itgottothepointwherehewasbecomingmoreopenaboutthethings
helikedandsometimeshewouldcomehomecryingbecausehewouldgetbullied.Hesoon
endedupnotcaringwhatpeoplehadtosayabouthim.Hebecamehimselfandhewashappyand
honestlythatsallthatmatteredtohismother.Iwashappyforhimandgladthathewashonest
withhimself.Hismotherdidntcareifhelikedpinkorlikedplayingwithdolls,aslongashe
washappywithwhohewas.
Manybelievethatgenderandsexarethesamething,butgenderisaroleweplayinand
sexiswhatwearebornwith.Eachindividualisbornwithasexbuthasgivenagenderby
society.Clothingplaysasignificantpartingendersocializationandthewaywepresent
ourselvestosociety.Asgrowingupwelearnfromourparentsandtheyretheoneswhoteachus
aboutgenderandthewaywearemeanttobeseen.Eventuallywelearnnewthingsand
sometimesourperspectiveschangethewayweseegenderaswegetolder.Wechangeourselves
tobehappierandcomfortableinourownskin.

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WorksCited
LorberJudith.NighttoHisDay:TheSocialConstructionofGenderComposing
Gender(2009):1934.Print.
Renzetti,ClaireandCurran,Daniel,FromeWomen,Men,andSocietyComposing
Gender(2009):76
90.Print.

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