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Dale Andersen

27702 Crown Valley Parkway #117


Ladera Ranch, CA 92694
(562) 508-5820
andersen.dale@gmail.com

IMAGINE: a musical about david


Formerly entitled "Once There Was a Boy Named David"
by

Dale Andersen
2008

ACTOR#

ActISc1

Actor1
Actor2
Actor3
Actor4

Satan
David

Actor5

Sheep2

Actor6

Sheep3

Sheep1

Actor7
Actor8

ACTOR#

Gabriel

ActIISc1

ActISc2
Satan
Saul
Jew1/Saul's Aide
Jew2/
Messenger
Jew3
Masked
Amalekite
Samuel

ActIISc2

Actor1
Actor2
Actor3

Satan
David
Saul

Satan
David
Elder1

Actor4

Saul's Aide

Elder2

Actor5
Actor6

Girl2

Actor7

Girl1

Actor8

Holy Man

Messenger
Warrior2/
Girl2
Warrior1/
Girl1
Holy Man

ActISc3

ActISc4

Satan
David
Abinadab
Eliab

Satan
David

Shammah

Serving Girl

Goliath

Innkeeper

ActIISc3
Satan
David
Nasib/Saul
Abimelek/
Saul's Aide
Psychic
Warrior2/
General
Warrior1/
Daughter
Holy Man/
Samuel

ActIISc4

ActIISc5

ActIISc6

Satan
David
Uriah

Satan
David
Jester

Satan
David

Eleazar

Minstrel

Sheep1

Jashen

Guard

Sheep2

Messenger

Advisor

Sheep3

Soldier

Personal
Assistant

Bathsheba

Amalekite

Food Taster

Gabriel

Hear Four Complete Songs >>> http://goo.gl/3tf0pM

ACT I
Act I Scene 1
(At rise: a lovely afternoon. A verdant
meadow. DAVID sits watching over his
fathers flock, writing in a copybook.
His slingshot lay beside him. SHEEP 1,
SHEEP 2 & SHEEP 3 recline chewing cuds.
Enter SATAN in a black robe. He walks with
a slight limp. He stands at a distance,
watching DAVID warily, frowning. Fifteen
seconds pass. Enter GABRIEL in a white
robe)
GABRIEL:
Well, what do you know? Satan! Its really you! As I
live and breathe! Thought you fell off the edge of the
earth. What have you been doing with yourself?
SATAN:
Oh, you know me. Going here, there and everywhere,
to and fro in the earth. Walking up and down in
it.
GABRIEL:
Lovely afternoon.
SATAN:
It is indeed. Been a long time, hasnt it?
GABRIEL:
It has. We should get together now and then.
SATAN:
We should. We really should. Im not just saying
that.
GABRIEL:
Oh now, look over there. Isnt that young David?
Such a dutiful boy, keeping watch over his fathers
sheep. And always with some writing material on him.
Such diligence.
SATAN:
Diligence? His merely having a pen and paper warrants
your praise? Your standards are much too relaxed.
Its just some schoolboy doodling.
Pag e 2

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GABRIEL:
Youre being hard on the boy.
SATAN:
I seriously doubt youll find the Code of Hammurabi or
an account of Deucalion's Flood in there. Think how it
was in our day. Nowadays its hey, whatever.
GABRIEL:
They say David writes for self-improvement.
SATAN:
Youd be shocked at what kids do for quote selfimprovement.
GABRIEL:
Im sure David is writing something serious.
SATAN:
Perhaps. Perhaps. Or he may be scribbling trash. Or a
love sonnet. Or God forbid, drawings of naked girls.
GABRIEL:
Is your knee acting up?
SATAN:
My knees fine. Whats not fine is the current state
of things. In our day, life was serious.
GABRIEL:
That was then. I say, Davids not the type to engage
in trash. In fact, Im willing to bet money on it.
SATAN:
Oh, beware, Master Gabriel! He who bets, barters hope
for false hope. Sorrow and misery will engulf thee.
GABRIEL:
I was speaking of a friendly wager, Master Satan.
SATAN:
Oh. Well. As long as its friendly.
(SATAN & GABRIEL stop near DAVID. SHEEP 1, 2
& 3 eye them suspiciously. GABRIEL clears
his throat)
Page 3

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GABRIEL:
Greetings, young David. And how are things with the
herd this lovely Spring afternoon?
(SHEEP 1 & 2 roll their eyes. SHEEP 3
sticks out tongue. DAVID looks up)
DAVID:
Flock. Its flock. A group of sheep is a flock.
(SHEEP 1, 2 & 3 hold up signs Flock flock
flock, were a flock)
GABRIEL:
We stand corrected. We couldnt help noticing you
always seem to have writing material with you.
DAVID:
Yes, sir. I keep a copybook. To write my ideas down.
GABRIEL:
So you do. So you do. Admirable practice, that.
DAVID:
(Stands, sticks slingshot in belt)
My mother says, you never know when an idea will hit.
For example? I had an incredible idea for. Are you
ready for this? The temple! Came to me out of the
blue. Almost like a dream. Like wham!
There it was.
SATAN:
(Rolls eyes)
Oh Dear God in Heaven!
GABRIEL:
Don't mind Master Satan. Ever since the fall. And his
knee injury. Well, never mind. David, tell us about
this temple, please. Details. Details.

P age 4

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DAVID:
Oh, just amazing. It came to me in living color. All
the proportions, the lengths, the widths, the heights.
I have it all down in here. I made numerous sketches.
I even know where the temple should go. Look over
there. Do you see that ridge?
GABRIEL:
You mean that one? By Jerusalem there?
DAVID:
Yes. Mount Moriah. The high point outside the walls.
GABRIEL:
I will admit it does look like a promising site.
DAVID:
I calculated the temples height, floor to dome, at
fifty feet. As Gods house, we need room for Him to
stand inside and move about. God is forty feet tall.
SATAN:
(A nervous glance at GABRIEL)
Forty feet tall? How did you deduce that?
DAVID:
It's in the Torah. Where Moses took the elders up
Mount Sinai to meet God? It says they saw the feet of
God? I thought long and hard about that. People were
smaller back then, due to diet, disease, whatever.
Assuming a man back then was four and a half feet
tall, assuming Gods ankle was at eye level, it should
measure four feet from Gods sole to His ankle.
GABRIEL:
A solid biblical reference!
SATAN:
Oh right.
DAVID:
The feet and ankles being one-tenth of ones height,
I extrapolated Gods aggregate height as forty feet.
GABRIEL:
Why boy! You're amazing!

Page 5

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DAVID:
Im going to build this temple as I imagine it.
(Sings. As he does, SHEEP 1, 2, 3 collect
wood and stones and erect a rude temple)
IMAGINE
ON THAT MOUNTAINTOP A TEMPLE
IMAGINE ON THAT MOUNTAINTOP GODS HOME
IMAGINE FROM AFAR
LIKE A BRIGHT AND SHINING STAR
A TEMPLE TO THE GLORY
OF THE ONE WHO REIGNS
THEN CONSIDER
ALL THE WHEREWITHAL TO MAKE IT
CONSIDER ALL THE WHEREWITHAL TO START
CONSIDER ALL THE PARTS
EACH CRAFTSMAN AND HIS ART
EACH MASON EVRY CARVER
AND EACH ARTISAN
THEN YOU ASK ME
WHOS THE WORTHY ONE TO BUILD IT
YOU ASK ME WHOS THE WORTHY ONE TO TRY
YOU ASK ME TO IMPART
WHAT TRUTH WITHIN MY HEART
COMPELS ME TO ENDEAVOR
TO EXALT HIS NAME
AND GOD WILLING I WILL BUILD IT
AND GOD WILLING IT WILL STAND
AND GOD WILLING IT WILL LIGHT UP
LIKE A BEACON IN THE LAND.
AND GOD WILLING I WILL BUILD IT
AND GOD WILLING IT WILL BE
AND GOD WILLING IT WILL GUARD US
FROM THE MOUNTAINS TO THE SEA.
AND
AND
AND
HOW

GOD WILLING I WILL BUILD IT


GOD WILLING IT WILL RULE
GOD WILLING IT WILL SHOW US
TO KNOW THAT WHICH IS TRUE.

AND
AND
AND
AND

GOD
GOD
GOD
HIS

WILLING I WILL BUILD IT


WILLING WITH HIS LOVE
WILLING WE WILL KNOW HIM
BLESSINGS FROM ABOVE.
Page 6

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DAVID(Cont):
IMAGINE
ON THAT MOUNTAINTOP A TEMPLE
IMAGINE ON THAT MOUNTAINTOP GODS HOME
IMAGINE FROM AFAR
LIKE A BRIGHT AND SHINING STAR
A TEMPLE TO THE GLORY
OF THE ONE WHO REIGNS
(Beat)
Someday, I will build it.
SATAN:
Shepherd boy to temple builder. Now thats a stretch.
GABRIEL:
Now now. Lets not discourage the lad.
SATAN:
Far be it from me to discourage any young person with
reasonable goals. Now correct me if Im wrong on this,
in order to build a temple.
DAVID:
No no. The Temple!
SATAN:
Right. In order to build the temple, one would first
have to be the king.
DAVID:
You mean I have to be king first? Is that right?
GABRIEL:
Im afraid Master Satan is right.
SATAN:
Of course Im right.
GABRIEL:
You see, David, kings dont take kindly to private
citizens usurping kingly functions. Building the
temple would be a task reserved for a king.
DAVID:
King. Hmmmm. I could do that. Id make a good king.
(SHEEP 1 & 2 hold coronation for SHEEP 3)
Page 7

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GABRIEL:
Ive no doubt you would.
SATAN:
Why do you encourage him? Let him be a farmer.
GABRIEL:
But a king can do so much good. Think of the benefits.
SATAN:
Think of all the waste. Kings tend to be bad.
GABRIEL:
Goodness! There is so much negativity in you.
SATAN:
Its called reality.
(Sings)
THIS IS WHAT A KING WILL DO
HELL TAKE YOUR EVRY SON,
HELL TAKE THEM FOR HIS CHARIOTS
HELL TAKE THEM EVRY ONE.
THIS IS WHAT A KING WILL DO
HELL FILL THE LAND WITH SPIES
HELL FILL YOUR PURSE WITH BRIBERY
HELL FILL YOUR HEAD WITH LIES.
THIS IS WHAT A KING WILL DO
HELL COUNT YOUR HOUSE AND LAND
HELL COUNT ON YOU TO PAY THE TAX
HELL COUNT YOU AS HIS MAN.
A KING WILL TAKE YOUR SILVER
A KING WILL TAKE YOUR GOLD
HELL GIVE IT TO HIS OFFICERS
TO KEEP THEM BOUGHT AND SOLD
THIS IS WHAT A KING WILL DO
HELL PUT YOU IN HIS SIGHTS
HELL PUT HIS FOOT DOWN ON YOUR NECK
HELL PUT TO DEATH YOUR RIGHTS.
A KING WILL TAKE YOUR DIAMONDS
A KING WILL TAKE YOUR PEARLS
HELL MAKE THEM INTO NECKLACES
FOR ALL HIS WIVES AND GIRLS
Page 8

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SO THAT IS
YOULL CRY
YOULL CRY
YOULL CRY

SATAN(Cont):
WHAT A KING WILL DO
OUT FOR RELIEF.
OUT HOW IT ISNT FAIR
OUT IN YOUR GRIEF.

THIS IS WHAT A KING WILL DO


HELL TAKE YOUR EVRY SON,
HELL TAKE THEM FOR HIS CHARIOTS
HELL TAKE THEM EVRY ONE.
DAVID:
No! No! I would never be like that.
GABRIEL:
Of course you wouldnt. Of course he wouldnt.
DAVID:
My mom would be really angry if I was a bad king.
GABRIEL:
Youd never be that.
DAVID:
No way. When I am king, you know what Ill do? Ill go
to peoples houses and knock on their door. Ill say,
Hi, Im David. Your King? Howm I doing?
(Mime. SHEEP 3, wearing crown, knocks on
door. SHEEP 1 & 2, as humble peasants,
open door, feign exaggerated shock,
delight)
GABRIEL:
A truly laudable idea.
SATAN:
What if they say, David, you stink! You should quit!
(Long pause)
DAVID:
No! They. They wouldnt say that. Would they?

Page 9

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SATAN:
Master Gabriel and I had a bet about you. My bet was
that you, like all young people today, engage in
nothing but idle thoughts and trash. I think thats
been amply demonstrated.
(Hands coin to DAVID)
Heres the amount we bet. I won. I always win. I give
my winnings to you. Youll need it. Just dont spend
it all in one place, boy.
(SATAN turns to leave, a smug smile)
DAVID:
How about I give you a chance to win it back?
SATAN:
Thanks but no thanks. Once is enough. You keep it.
DAVID:
Just as I suspected. You go for the easy wins, do
you? But run away from the hard ones. Is that it?
(SATAN stops, does not turn)
SATAN:
You dont know what hard is, little one.
GABRIEL:
David. Please. Master Satan meant it as a joke.
There was no intention to insult you. Let it go.
SATAN:
(Turns)
No. Let him talk. Let him dig the hole deeper.
DAVID:
Master Gabriel is a kind person. Hell always let you
win. With me, itd be different. It wouldnt be a
gimme. But go ahead and run away if you want.
SATAN:
You do have a mouth on you.
GABRIEL:
Oh David. I do wish youd learn to hold your tongue.

Page 10

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SATAN:
Its all right, Gabriel. He needs to learn. Name
your game, boy.
DAVID:
Rock, Paper, Scissors.
SATAN:
I know the game.
DAVID:
(Sets coin on ground)
One time. One time for all the marbles. Rock smashes
scissors. Scissors cut paper. Paper covers rock.
SATAN:
I said, I know the game.
(GABRIEL moves back. SATAN & DAVID circle
each other, staring each other down. They
stop. They face each other)
DAVID & SATAN:
Once. Twice. Thrice. Go!
(They both show rock)
SATAN:
Oho! You got lucky that time.
(SATAN & DAVID circle each other
menacingly. They stop. They face each
other)
DAVID & SATAN:
Once. Twice. Thrice. Go!
(They both show paper)
SATAN:
Another tie. I'm getting to like you less and less.
(SATAN & DAVID circle each other. They
stop. They face each other. SATAN
nervously blinks)
DAVID & SATAN:
Once. Twice. Thrice. Go!
Page 11

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(SATAN shows paper. DAVID shows scissors.
SATAN gasps. DAVID grins)
DAVID:
Scissors cut paper, old man.
(Fade to black)
End of Scene

Page 12

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Act I Scene 2
(Bare stage. SATAN in garish rock and roll
garb. He rubs a welt on his arm. It is
painful. He gingerly rubs in some balm. A
piano is off to the side)
SATAN:
Ill have you know Im a person of consequence. In the
past, Ive played opposite some very pretty ladies.
And Ive had lots of good lines. Lots.
(Takes tattered script from pocket)
Here. This is a good example. A nude scene.
(Reads)
Satan: Did God really mean, you mustnt eat from that tree?
Eve: We may eat fruit from the trees, but not that one, lest we
die. Were not even supposed to touch it.
Satan (touches tree): You wont die. He knows when you eat of
it, your eyesll be opened and youll be like him.
(He picks fruit, holds it out to her)
Here. Try it. Youll like it.

(Tosses script aside)


Wonderful lines, those. Pithy. Dramatic. Fraught with
shadings and nuance. They dont write lines like that
anymore. Today its sophomoric relationship drivel
from the mouths of limp, weak, whiney, clueless,
dysfunctional protagonists. I must admit I have deep
concerns. A sense of foreboding, if you will. Ive a
feeling Ill not be well represented in this conceit.
No matter. The show goes on and trouper that I am,
Ill strut my part on stage. But Ill strut warily.
(SAMUEL enters. He has a petition in his
hand. He appears troubled)
Thats Samuel, son of Elkanah. A powerful prophet and
judge. So powerful they say Jehovah Himself floats on
a cloud just behind him. Normally, hes self-assured.
But lately, hes been worried. He has a problem. It
seems the people want - SAMUEL:
A king! They want a king now! Half the people in
Judah have signed this, this, this petition!

Page 13

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(JEWS 1, 2, 3 enter with protest signs


reading KING NOW! SATAN goes to piano,
plays and sings Jerry Lee Lewis style)
SATAN:
(Sings)
OLD SAMMY'S GOT THE KING NOW BLUES
ITS GIVING HIM A FRIGHT
PEOPLE MARCHIN' BY HIS HOUSE
ALL HOURS DAY AND NIGHT
PEOPLE AGITATIN' TO
MAKE CHANGES TO THE LAW
HE WONDERS IF THE CAMELS BACK
IS BROKEN BY THIS STRAW.
THEY SAY, WE WANT A KING RIGHT NOW.
THATS HOW ITS GOTTA BE.
SORRY, SAM, WERE MOVING ON.
DONT BLOCK REALITY
BUT BUCK UP SAMUEL, BUCK UP
BUCK UP SAMUEL, BUCK UP
BUCK UP SAMUEL, BUCK UP
BUCK UP SAMUEL, BUCK UP
BUCK UP SAMUEL
THINGSLL GET BETTER FOR YOU.
SAMUEL CRIES IT JUST AINT FAIR.
ITS CRASHING DOWN MY LIFE!
HE HEADS OFF TO SUBURBIA
AND KICKS HIS DOG AND WIFE.
HE GOES INTO A SYNAGOGUE.
LIKE ANY PIOUS JEW.
TELL ME, TELL ME, LORD OF HOSTS.
OH, TELL ME WHAT TO DO.
THE ANSWER COMES BACK PRESENTLY
THE ANSWER COMES TO HIM.
HAVE A BOWL OF CHICKEN SOUP
AND TAKE SOME ASPIRIN.
AND BUCK UP SAMUEL, BUCK UP
BUCK UP SAMUEL, BUCK UP
BUCK UP SAMUEL, BUCK UP
BUCK UP SAMUEL, BUCK UP
BUCK UP SAMUEL
THINGSLL GET BETTER FOR YOU.

Page 14

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SATAN(Cont):
SAMUEL CRIES, BUCK UP, YOU SAY?
YOU TOSSIN' ME A BONE?
YOU THROW ME IN THE LIONS DEN,
I FEEL SO ALL ALONE
NOW SAMUEL, HES GROWN USED TO ALL
THE STATUS HE ENJOYS,
WHAT WITH ALL THE PRIVILEGES,
AND POWER HE DEPLOYS.
FROWNS WHEN YAHWEH SAYS TO HIM
NOW PLEASE DONT MISCONSTRUE
GET OUT IN FRONT AND LEAD OR ILL
SEND YOU TO TIMBUKTU.
NOW BUCK UP SAMUEL, BUCK UP
BUCK UP SAMUEL, BUCK UP
BUCK UP SAMUEL, BUCK UP
BUCK UP SAMUEL, BUCK UP
BUCK UP SAMUEL
THINGSLL GET BETTER FOR YOU.
JEW1:
The Philistines have kings. Even the dirty, thieving,
bushwhacking Amalekites have a king. What about us?
JEW2:
We need a king. So we can kick some butt.
SAMUEL:
Be patient, good people. No need for drastic measures.
In due time and in the very near future, maybe really,
really soon, the Philistine situation will be resolved
in our favor.
JEW3:
Favor schmavor. The future is now. We need a king
now.
JEWS 1, 2, 3:
(Waving signs)
King now! King now! King now! King now!
(JEWS 1, 2, 3 exit, chanting, King now!
King now! SAMUEL shakes his head wearily,
exits in opposite direction)

Page 15

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SATAN:
(Dons robe of royal official as he speaks)
Contrary to received wisdom, I like Jews. Theyre
plucky, combative, stiff-necked and they always read
the fine print. But every once in a while, they go off
the deep end. Take this king now stuff. Theres lots
of downside to having a king. Personally, I vote
libertarian. The less government, the better. But hey,
thats me.
(Lights up, SAULs throne room. Mandate of
Heaven certificate on wall above throne.
MASKED AMALEKITE in tribal garb enters,
flings spear with a note attached at
Mandate. Spear sticks in wall in center of
Mandate with a loud THUNK! MASKED
AMALEKITE exits. SAUL rushes in followed
by SAULS AIDE & SATAN. SATAN winks at
audience)
SAUL:
Did you hear that? What was that?!
SATAN:
What was what, your grace?
SAUL:
Oh my God! Look!
SAULS AIDE:
An Amalekite spear in your Mandate of Heaven. With a
note.
SAUL:
What does it say? Read it!
SATAN:
(Reads note)
Oh King Saul! Lament, for yours is a realm of
darkness and obscurity! Your legacy will be ruin and
more ruin!
SAUL:
These Amalekites are scum!

Page 16

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SATAN:
If they think this weakens your resolve, they are
sorely mistaken. Show them, O King. Show them you will
not be frightened. Show them your mettle.
(Hands note to SAUL. Enter MESSENGER)
Ah! Look! A happy dispatch borne by this wingd
Mercury. You have good news, we trust.
MESSENGER:
I have news.
SAUL:
Well, spit it out. We could use a little cheer.
MESSENGER:
Philistines, your highness.
SAUL:
We stomped them. Right?
MESSENGER:
Not exactly. Four of them slipped through our
defences, attacked a school, killed a teacher and her
students. We cornered them in a chicken coop and - SAUL:
It never ends. It just goes on and on.
SAULS AIDE:
Hang in there, your majesty.
SATAN:
Dont let it trouble you, your grace.
SAUL:
Trouble? Me? Who says it troubles me?
(Sings in doo-wop style)
LOOK ON THIS FACE
GAZE ON THIS VISAGE
IT SHOULD BE CLEAR
WHAT I AM ABOUT.
OH OH OH. OH OH OH. OH OH OH. OH OH OH.
AM I TROUBLED?
SAULS AIDE & SATAN:
NO NO NO.
HES AS COOL AS AN ICE TRAY
Page 17

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SAUL:
AM I TROUBLED?
SAULS AIDE & SATAN:
NO NO NO.
HES AS SHARP AS A STINGRAY
SAUL:
AM I TROUBLED?
SAULS AIDE & SATAN:
NO NO NO.
HES AS STRAIGHT AS A RUNWAY
SAUL:
AM I TROUBLED?
SAULS AIDE & SATAN:
NO NO NO.
HES AS SET AS A PAYDAY
SAUL:
AM I TROUBLED?
SAULS AIDE & SATAN:
NO NO NO.
HES AS SMOOTH AS FAIRWAY
SAUL:
AM I TROUBLED?
SAULS AIDE & SATAN:
NO NO NO.
HES AS FIRM AS A GATEWAY.
OH OH OH. OH OH OH. OH OH OH. OH OH OH.
SAUL:
THIS IS NOT A WORRIED FACE
THIS ISNT GRIM RESOLVE
WERE NOT IN A PANIC MODE
WELL NOT TO BLACK DISSOLVE
SAULS AIDE & SATAN:
IS HE TROUBLED?
SAUL:
DO YOU SEE ME RUNNING SCARED?
Page 18

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SAULS AIDE & SATAN:


IS HE TROUBLED?
SAUL:
IS MY REASONING IMPAIRED?
SAULS AIDE & SATAN:
IS HE TROUBLED?
SAUL:
DO YOU THINK IM UNAWARE?
SAULS AIDE & SATAN:
IS HE TROUBLED?
SAUL:
NOW JUST ASK ME IF I CARE!
TROUBLED
TROUBLED
TROUBLED
TROUBLED

IS
IS
IS
IS

SAUL & SAULS AIDE & SATAN:


AS TROUBLED DOES
ILLUSION
WHAT WEAKENS US
CONFUSION

SAULS AIDE:
TROUBLEDS A CONSPIRACY
SATAN:
TROUBLEDS A MALIGNANCY
SAUL:
TROUBLEDS A CALAMITY
AND I WILL HAVE IT OUT!
OUT!
OUT!
LOOK AT THIS FACE
GAZE ON THIS VISAGE
IT SHOULD BE CLEAR
WHAT I AM ABOUT.
SAUL & SAULS AIDE & SATAN:
OH OH OH. OH OH OH. OH OH OH. OH OH OH. OH OH OH.

Page 19

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SATAN:
(To MESSENGER)
Why couldnt you bring good news? He wants good news.
(To SAUL)
Strike back hard. Make them pay. Two of them for
every one of us. Grind them into dust.
MESSENGER:
If I may make a comment, my king.
SAUL:
Yes?
MESSENGER:
In my opinion, our two eyes for an eye, two teeth for
a tooth policy isnt working. It just exacerbates - SAUL:
Where did a messenger learn a word like exacerbate?
SAULS AIDE:
A little education is worse than none at all, my lord.
SAUL:
Is exacerbate even a word?
SATAN:
It shouldnt be. Lets ban it.
SAUL:
Lets ban all four syllable words.
SAULS AIDE:
Girlie-man!
SAUL:
Get your pretentious, la-di-da butt out of my sight.
(MESSENGER exits. To SATAN & SAULS AIDE)
Call up the reserves and the national guard. Were
going to the Valley of Elah to fight Philistines.
(Dons sword)
I intend to repay this insult like for like.
(Fade to black)
End of Scene

Page 20

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Act I Scene 3
(At rise: A space. Davids older brothers,
ELIAB, ABINADAB and SHAMMAH, in military
uniforms. Their swords are on ground
nearby. ABINADAB is trying to start a
campfire by making sparks with a flint. A
second space. SATAN in turban, cloak &
walking stick of a peddlar)
SATAN:
That young lad with the temple scheme. A most unusual
ambition. Not the sort of thing your average young lad
aspires to. And the way he treated me. Overly rude,
Id say. No manners at all. Worrisome all around. I
sense gathering clouds. Red flags popping up
everywhere. What to do? What to do?
(Enter DAVID in hiking cloak, backpack &
walking stick. His slingshot in his belt)
Well, speaking of the devil!
(Adjusts turban so as not to be
recognized)
Excuse me there, young man!
Sorry. Cant talk.

DAVID:
Im in a huge rush.

SATAN:
At least you can tell me where youre going.
DAVID:
(Indicates his backpack)
Got home-cooked meals here for my brothers. Theyre
in King Sauls army in the Valley of Elah.
SATAN:
(Points up ahead)
Ah. The Valley of Elah. Thats up ahead, isnt it?
DAVID:
Yes. My brother, Eliab, is a sergeant. Abinadab and
Shammah are privates. Theyre all in the infantry.
SATAN:
Defending the country. You must be proud of them.
DAVID:
They were drafted.
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SATAN:
Im headed out there myself. Im a merchant.
(Hands him card)
Lucifer Enterprises. Marketing gewgaws, doodads and
trinkets factory-direct to the military customer.
Would you like to see a gewgaw?
DAVID:
Im really in a hurry.
SATAN:
(Blocks DAVIDS way, holds up gewgaw)
Oh come on. Try it. Youll like it.
DAVID:
(Takes gewgaw, turns it over in his hand)
What am I supposed to do with it?
SATAN:
You hold it up to your eye. Look in the peephole.
DAVID:
Thats a naked girl.
SATAN:
You move it to the left, she puts her clothes on. Move
it to the right, she undresses. Just the thing for the
lonely soldier at the front.
DAVID:
(Hands it back)
I think its disgusting.
(DAVID starts off)
SATAN:
I hope youre not one of those religious boys. Too
bad about that. Youre a handsome lad, you are. Be a
shame to have all that go to waste.
(DAVID exits. SATAN shrugs. Turns to
ABINADAB)
Excuse me, young man!
(No response from ABINADAB)
You there! Excuse me!
ABINADAB:
Yeah?

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SATAN:
Is this the Valley of Elah where the big battle is to
be fought?
ELIAB:
Who wants to know?
SATAN:
If you dont mind, I was asking him.
ELIAB:
I do mind. Im his older brother. You can ask me.
SATAN:
Theres no call to be disputatious.
ELIAB:
This is a war zone youre in.
SATAN:
(Steps into space, blackout on other
space)
War zone? So, this is the Valley of Elah.
SHAMMAH:
Well, sure. Everyone knows that.
ELIAB:
Shammah!
SHAMMAH:
Whatd I say?
ELIAB:
Careful, brother. Loose lips sink ships.
(To SATAN)
Whats your business here, stranger?
SATAN:
My. My business. Oh. Im. Im uh. A poor intinerant
merchant, travelling the highways and byways of.
ELIAB:
Travelling. So you were out on the main road just now.
SATAN:
Yes. Of course.
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SHAMMAH:
He must have seen David.
ELIAB:
Our youngest brother, David. Hes on his way here
with bread and corn and cheese from home.
SHAMMAH:
Moms homemade bread.
ABINADAB:
Corn on the cob.
ELIAB:
Real goat cheese. Not the foul stuff the army passes
off, but the real thing. I love goat cheese. Did you
see our brother, a young man with ruddy good looks?
SATAN:
A lot of people were using the road. But I do recall
having a chat with a comely young man. He didnt say
his name, but I recall he had a sling in his belt.
ABINADAB:
Yep! Thats David! Always has his sling.
SHAMMAH:
All right! Were gonna have Moms home cooking, Moms
home cooking, Moms home cooking. Tonight.
ELIAB:
Goat cheese! I can already taste it. Thanks for
bringing good news. Sorry I was a little rough with
you. What are you doing out here?
SATAN:
Me? Oh uh. A little of this. A little of that. I
deal in gewgaws and doodads and trinkets.
(Opens backpack)
Things to lighten up the soldiers drab life.
ELIAB:
Yeah?
SATAN:
Here. Take a look at these. See if you like them.

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ELIAB:
Oh hey, look at that. Oh yeah, that is cool.
SHAMMAH:
Oh yeah, wow.
ELIAB:
Oh, this is hot. You should see this. See how she - SHAMMAH:
Oh yeah, thats sweet. You move it to the right and
she - ABINADAB:
Hey! Come on! Lemme see!
ELIAB:
Make that campfire like I told you. Then maybe I
will. I want my coffee.
ABINADAB:
Not fair! You gotta let me see! Come on!
SATAN:
Well, good. Now I see you lads are amusing
yourselves. Guess Ill just mosey on down the road.
ELIAB:
(Transfixed on gewgaw)
Yeah. Yeah. You do that.
SATAN:
So the Philistine fortifications are over there? Is
that right?
ELIAB:
Uh yeah yeah. Right.
SATAN:
(Points toward the Philistine lines)
Okay, lads, I'm going over there now. Ta ta.
ELIAB:
Yeah sure bye.

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(Lights up on a new space in direction
SATAN was pointing. In space, GOLIATH sits
staring at his armor & weapons. SATAN
exits first space & enters GOLIATH space.
ABINADAB returns to trying to start
campfire, glaring at his brothers. ELIAB &
SHAMMAH continue enjoying themselves
staring into the gewgaws)
SATAN:
Excuse me, young fellow.
(No response from GOLIATH)
You there! Excuse me!
GOLIATH:
Yeah?
SATAN:
Is this the Valley of Elah where the great battle is
to be fought?
GOLIATH:
A battle, maybe. Not sure how great itll be.
SATAN:
Oh?
GOLIATH:
Every day, I put this stuff on and go out and try to
get one of them to fight. But they wont fight.
SATAN:
Theyre scared of you?
GOLIATH:
Seems that way. We been sitting here for forty days.
Youd think one of them would.
SATAN:
And youre getting restless, I see. You want someone
to start something.
GOLIATH:
Well. Yeah.
SATAN:
What if I told you I can get one of them to come out
here and fight you?
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GOLIATH:
You could do that? Tell you, Im so bored I could - SATAN:
Ill do more. Ill throw in a victory. Guaranteed. How
about that?
GOLIATH:
Whats the catch?
SATAN:
Oh please. Do I look like the kind of guy whod set
conditions?
GOLIATH:
I dont know. Are you?
SATAN:
You do have to do one thing for me.
GOLIATH:
Aha. A condition.
SATAN:
You have to kill him.
GOLIATH:
Kill him?
SATAN:
Kill him.
GOLIATH:
Thats it?
SATAN:
I dont want you letting him run away with his tail
between his legs. I want him dead. Think you can
handle that?
GOLIATH:
Sure. No problem.
SATAN:
Well, that settles that. Ta ta, my largish friend.

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(SATAN exits. GOLIATH stands, starts


putting on his armor. ELIAB & SHAMMAH
continue staring into the gewgaws)
ABINADAB:
Darn darn darn!
ELIAB:
Havent you got that fire going yet?
Please!

ABINADAB:
Please start, fire!

ELIAB:
Talking to it wont help, brother. Come on. Get the
fire going. I want my coffee.
ABINADAB:
Darn! Darn! Darn! Darn!
SHAMMAH:
Cussing wont help either.
GOLIATH:
(Now in his armor. He shakes his spear)
Hello over there, all you Hebrew nancy-boys!
SHAMMAH:
Oh shoot, its Goliath again.
GOLIATH:
Listen, ladies! Its been forty days and forty nights.
Time to go home to your boyfriends, dont you think?
ELIAB:
Why doesnt someone shut him up?
GOLIATH:
Hey girls! Come on! Lets settle this and go home.
Send your best out here to fight me. Well go one on
one. Mano a mano. Winner take all.
SHAMMAH:
Why doesnt King Saul do something?
GOLIATH:
Im waiting, ladies. Im waiting.
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ABINADAB:
Darn! Darn! Darn! Darn!
ELIAB:
Why dont you go out there?
SHAMMAH:
Are you crazy? Hed eat me alive.
GOLIATH:
Cant wait much longer, girls. Gotta get a pedicure.
Five more seconds. Four. Three. Two. One. Ciao!
(GOLIATH sits down, a frustrated
expression on his face)
He lied, said hed get someone to fight.
SHAMMAH:
Hes gone.
ELIAB:
I dont mind saying, Im tired of this. If Saul would
just send someone over there to slit his fat throat.
SHAMMAH:
Admit it. Sauls scared.
ABINADAB:
Okay! Got it! I got a spark! Finally!
(Enter SATAN in an Army Lieutenant's
uniform, winks broadly at audience)
SATAN:
Just whats going on here?
(ELIAB, ABINADAB and SHAMMAH trip over
each other forming up and coming to
attention)
I said, WHATS GOING ON HERE?
ELIAB:
We. Were making a fire to make coffee, Lieutenant.
SATAN:
Coffee. Marvelous. Just marvelous. A giant is
screaming insults at us. Are my soldiers volunteering
to defend the honor of his majesty King Saul? No,
because theyre too busy making coffee. Whats wrong
with this picture? Pre-SENT! ARMS!
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(ELIAB, ABINADAB and SHAMMAH reach for
their swords, but their scabbards are
empty)
SATAN:
(Kicks swords)
You never EVER leave your pieces adrift on the deck.
Never! You got that, people? I said, YOU GOT THAT?
ELIAB, ABINADAB & SHAMMAH:
YES, SIR!
SATAN:
The next time I come in here, if I find one piece of
gear adrift, your sorry buttsll be in a sling. Whos
in charge here? I said, WHOS IN CHARGE HERE?
ELIAB:
I.

I am, sir.

SATAN:
Marvelous! Coffee boys in charge. Okay, listen and
listen good, coffee boy. I want this space secure. I
want it policed from stem to stern. And when I come
back, it had best be standing tall.
ELIAB:
Yes, sir.
SATAN:
I cant hear you.
ELIAB:
YES, SIR!
SATAN:
Dis-MISSED. Now secure your pieces.
(ELIAB, ABINADAB & SHAMMAH scramble to get
their swords. SATAN rolls his eyes, shakes
his head, exits)
ABINADAB:
Coffee boy! Ha! Ha! Ha!
ELIAB:
Shut up!
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SHAMMAH:
Coffee boy. Hee hee.
ELIAB:
I said, shut up!
(ELIAB sulks. DAVID enters, bearing food)
ABINADAB:
Hey, look whos here. David!
DAVID:
Hi, brothers. Goodies from home.
ABINADAB:
Hey, David! Awwwright, homemade bread! And corn!
And real goat cheese!
DAVID:
No no no. Dont touch the cheese. The cheese is for
your Lieutenant.
ELIAB:
What? For who? The Lieutenant can go to blazes!
DAVID:
Hey! No joke. I mean it. Pops was real specific.
He said the goat cheese is for the Lieutenant.
ELIAB:
(Rips off some cheese, stuffs it in mouth)
The Lieutenant can got to blazes!
DAVID:
Whatd I say?
SHAMMAH:
Its not you, David.
ABINADAB:
The Lieutenant was just in here and - ELIAB:
No no no! Dont you tell him a thing! None of his
darn business. Hell just tell Pops.
(ELIAB goes to the corner, sits with his
back to them and continues sulking)
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ABINADAB:
Im staying out of this. Im not saying another word.
SHAMMAH:
You talk to him, David. You always cheer him up.
DAVID:
Hey, Eliab. Hey come on, cheer up. Hey come on, its
me. Its your little bro. Its David. Come on!
(A spotlight on DAVID as he makes faces,
does pratfalls, makes fart sounds under
his armpit. No reaction from ELIAB)
Come on, Big Brother. Don't be like this. Cheer up.
Smile for me. Come on. I need my Big Brother.
(Sings)
WHEN ALL THE KIDS THEY PICK ON ME AND NO ONES ON MY
SIDE
WHEN MOMMA COMES INTO MY ROOM AND CALLS IT A PIGSTY
WHEN POPPA YELLS AND TELLS ME THAT HES GONNA TAN MY
HIDE
THATS WHEN LITTLE BRO NEEDS BIG BROTHER
WHEN ME AND THIS ONE GUY SQUARE OFF AND NO ONES GOT
MY BACK
WHEN HE AND ME ARE FIGHTING AND THEN SOMEONE ELSE
ATTACKS
WHEN YOU SEE ME YELLING HELP ME! LIKE I WAS A MANIAC
THATS WHEN LITTLE BRO NEEDS BIG BROTHER
COME ON, BIG BROTHER, GET UP AN' GET RIGHT
COME ON, BIG BROTHER, STEP INTO THE LIGHT
COME ON, BIG BROTHER
YOU GOTTA GET RIGHT, RIGHT, RIGHT
COME ON, BIG BROTHER, GET UP AN' GET RIGHT
WHEN SATAN COMES AND TAKES MY HAND TO LEAD ME ALL
ASTRAY
WHEN I AM WEAK AND WEARY AND TEMPTATION COMES TO STAY
WHEN A LITTLE GUY NEEDS A BIG SOMEONE TO HELP HIM FIND
HIS WAY
THATS WHEN LITTLE BRO NEEDS BIG BROTHER
COME ON, BIG BROTHER, GET UP AN' GET RIGHT
COME ON, BIG BROTHER, STEP INTO THE LIGHT
COME ON, BIG BROTHER
YOU GOTTA GET RIGHT, RIGHT, RIGHT
COME ON, BIG BROTHER, GET UP AN' GET RIGHT

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ABINADAB:
When hes like this, theres just no hope.
(GOLIATH stands up, sword in hand)
GOLIATH:
Hello again out there, all you circumcised girlies!
DAVID:
Whats that?
SHAMMAH:
Goliath. Big Philistine giant. Every hour, the big
galoot challenges King Saul to single combat.
GOLIATH:
Come on, ladies. Lets do it one on one, winner take
all. Whats the matter? Too chicken? Too scared?
DAVID:
How long has this been going on?
ABINADAB:
Forty days.
DAVID:
Forty days? Every hour?
SHAMMAH:
Were starting to call him Old Faithful.
DAVID:
Oh yeah. I see. He is a hefty one, isn't he?
(Scrunches down next to the sulking ELIAB)
Hey, Eliab. Big Brother. What if I made that big fat
dummy shut up? Would that cheer you up?
ELIAB:
It might.
DAVID:
Well, what if I brought you his sword? Would that
help bring you out of your funk?

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ELIAB:
It might.
DAVID:
What if I brought you his head? Would that cheer you
up even more?
ELIAB:
That would sure help.
GOLIATH:
You cant beat me! Because I am Superman! I am the
Most Dominant Ever!
DAVID:
(Takes out his sling)
This is my pledge to you, Big Brother. That fat, outof-shape loser is going down. I guarantee it.
SHAMMAH:
Okay, David. A jokes a joke. Back off. Hes too big.
ABINADAB:
Shammahs right, David. Forget it. You cant win this.
ELIAB:
Davey. As much as I love you, forget this. Go home.
SHAMMAH:
Eliabs right.
GOLIATH:
Time is tight, ladies. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.
ELIAB:
Go home to Pops. Please.
DAVID:
No. When I decide on something, thats it. Now,
everyone, just move back. Give little bro some room.
(They move back. DAVID picks up several
stones for his sling, sings)
OH I LIFT UP MINE EYES UNTO THE HILL
OH I LIFT UP MINE EYES UNTO THE HILL
YEA, I WALK IN THE VALLEY
OR I SLIDE DOWN AN ALLEY
I WILL LIFT UP MINE EYES UNTO THE HILL
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DAVID(Cont):
AN THE WORD
IT IS REAL
AN THE POWER
IT PROCLAIM
SEE THE STONES
IN THE FIELD
HIPPY-HOPPIN
TO HIS NAME.
STONE THEY BE SHAKIN LEFT
STONE THEY SHAKIN RIGHT
STONE THEY DO A DOSIE-DOE
MOVE IT IN TIGHT
SMOKIN LIKE A BURNIN SPEAR
BUZZIN LIKE A BEE
LORD, WONCHA GUIDE EM TRUE
ALL THE WORLD TO SEE
GIMME SHELTER IN THE SHADOW OF YOUR WING
GIMME SHELTER IN THE SHADOW OF YOUR WING
SEE THE MAN I BEWARIN
SEE HIM GLARE, SEE HIM STARIN
GIMME SHELTER IN THE SHADOW OF YOUR WING
AN THE WORD
IT IS REAL
AN THE POWER
IT PROCLAIM
SEE THE STONES
IN THE FIELD
HIPPY-HOPPIN
TO HIS NAME.
(Grins, winks, puts stone into sling)
Watch my back, brothers.
(DAVID exits. Sound of a sling whirling)
GOLIATH:
Whats this? A skinny kid? Sauls sending a child
against me? Is this his best? What an insult!
ABINADAB:
Oh God! Please Goliath. Dont hurt him too bad.

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VOICE OF DAVID:
Get ready, Fat Boy. I got a stone in my sling with
your low rent, out-of-shape name written all over it.
GOLIATH:
Ho ho! Come, little mouse. Ill feed you to the birds.
SHAMMAH:
Get out of there, David. Get out of there. Please!
VOICE OF DAVID:
I just now said a prayer. God told me you got one
minute left. Just enough time for your last meal.
GOLIATH:
Ho ho ho! Speaking of last meal, little man, I got
seven hungry dogs in my kennel. I promised them a
nice snack. So keep coming closer.
(Sling whirls louder)
Closer.
(Sling whirls louder)
And closer.
(Whirling stops. Sound of stone in flight)
And close.
(Sound of stone hitting head. THUNK!
GOLIATHs hand to head. GOLIATH falls.
Sound, body hits ground. FWUMP! Sound
of a thousand Philistine warriors in
shock, OH GOD NOOO! Sound of a
thousand Hebrew warriors cheering,
AWRIGHTT, DAVIDD! WAYYYY TO GO!
Blackout on GOLIATHs space)
ELIAB:
WooooooHooooooooooooo! My God! He did it! David, my
little bro did it! Thats my little bro! Of course, I
knew all along he could. I always told him, you get
one shot in life, you gotta grab it. I knew he could
do it. Didnt I always say he could do it? Well,
didnt I? Course I did!

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(ELIAB dances jig. ELIAB, ABINADAB &
SHAMMAH exit, cheering. Fade to black.
Lights up, bare stage. DAVID enters with
GOLIATHssword. The blade drips with
blood. Sound of a thousand Israelite
warriors cheering, DAVID! DAVID! DAVID!
DAVID touches finger to blood and puts it
to tongue. He smiles, waves toward the
cheering. Enter SATAN, dressed like a
Israelite soldier, clapping. He takes hold
of DAVIDS wrist, raises his arm high,
huge smile. The cheering grows louder,
DAVID! DAVID! DAVID! Fade to black)
End of Scene

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Act I Scene 4
(Lights up, bare stage. DAVID enters
holding an opened letter)
DAVID:
Summoned to King Sauls palace. It says Im going to
be a court official. This is my big chance. Remember
what my big brother said. He said, you get one shot.
(Sings)
YOU GET ONE SHOT
AND YOU SINK OR SWIM WITH IT
YOU GET ONE SHOT
AND YOU SOAR OR TAKE A HIT
GRAB IT AND YOURE OH SO CLEVER
SEE YOU ON YOUR WAY
GRAB IT OR ITS LOST FOREVER
WATCH IT SLIP AWAY
YOU GET ONE SHOT
ITS THE SAME FOR ALL AND ONE
YOU GET ONE SHOT
FOR YOUR SEASON IN THE SUN
GRAB IT AND YOURE OH SO CLEVER
SEE YOU TOUCH THE SKY
GRAB IT OR ITS LOST FOREVER
KISS YOUR LUCK GOOD BYE
YOU GET ONE SHOT
DID YOUR BEST GO IN THE TANK?
YOU GET ONE SHOT
THERES THE QUICKSAND AND YOU SANK
ONE
ONE
ONE
ONE

SHOT AND YOURE HISTORY


SHOT AND ITS OVER
SHOT FOR THE VICTORY
SHOT, YOURE IN THE CLOVER

YOU GET ONE SHOT


ALWAYS ONCE AND NEVER TWICE.
YOU GET ONE SHOT
FOR THE CHAMPAGNE CHILLED ON ICE.

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ITS ONE
ONE SHOT
ONE SHOT
ONE SHOT

DAVID(Cont):
SHOT TO CLEAR ALL THE BASES
TO DRAW OUT ALL THE ACES
TO WIN ALL THE RACES
IS ALL YOU GET!
(DAVID goes back to reading his
letter. Lights up on a new space,
the back room at an inn with
a SERVING GIRL AND INKKEEPER.
SERVING GIRL is dressed like a
hussy. SATAN, dressed as a court
official, stands just outside this
space. There's a badge of office
around his neck. He regards DAVID
warily)

SATAN:
David. The name means beloved of God. Thats not to
say hes actually beloved of God. A name can run
counter to reality. Think of all those Latino boys
named Jesus (pr: hey-SOOS) who are anything but.
SERVING GIRL:
(Lights candle on table)
I dont care. Hes a dirty old man!
INNKEEPER:
Hes a good customer!
SERVING GIRL:
He smells of brimstone and charcoal! He needs to take
a bath!
(INKKEEPER takes out a coin, shoves it
under SERVING GIRLs nose, as she wipes
table)
INNKEEPER:
Does this smell? Does it? You be nice to him. Hes a
Palace official and a good tipper. God save King Saul!
(SATAN enters space, pinches SERVING GIRL)
SATAN:
God save King Saul. Youre certain the room is secure?
INNKEEPER:
Oh yes, sir. No one comes near without my say so.
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SATAN:
Therell be a young man coming by. He and I will
require absolute privacy.
INNKEEPER:
(Giving a lecherous wink)
Oh say no more, sir. I understand comple - SATAN:
Wipe that lewd grin from your face, you fat oaf!
(Flashes badge of office)
You see this badge of office? When I wear this, Im
not on personal business. Im on the Kings business.
INNKEEPER:
My apologies, sir. You neednt worry about a thing.
I see nothing, I hear nothing, I say nothing.
SATAN:
(Places coin in INNKEEPERs hand)
Just get out.
INNKEEPER:
Oh thank you. Thank you. Again, I meant no disrespect.
SATAN:
Out!
(INNKEEPER, SERVING GIRL bow, start to
exit)
SERVING GIRL:
Did he call you an oaf?
INNKEEPER:
Shut up, wench!
(INNKEEPER, SERVING GIRL exit, shut door.
Silence. SATAN sits, runs hand thru flame,
smiles. DAVID knocks on door)
SATAN:
Come in!
(Door opens, DAVID pokes his head in)
David! Welcome! Welcome! Come in! Come in!
(DAVID enters)
Sit. Sit. Please sit.

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DAVID:
Thank you, sir.
SATAN:
(SATAN pours wine, raises glass)
Welcome, Giant Killer. L'chayim.
DAVID:
L'chayim. Im no hero. It was one of those things.
(They drink it down. SATAN pours again)
SATAN:
Oh, David. Youre much, much too modest. Do you know
the King requested you?
(DAVID says nothing, shows no emotion)
The King asked for you by name. Arent you excited?
DAVID:
I. I guess so.
SATAN:
You guess so. Its depressing to see one so clearly
underwhelmed by his own good fortune. And to think it
was I who recommended you. I who spoke your name to
the King. I who reminded him of your great service to
the crown after everyone else seemed to have
forgotten. Arent you going to thank me?
DAVID:
Thank. Thank you.
SATAN:
This is how it was. King Saul in the Great Hall with
his courtiers. He was looking about him, eyes shooting
fire, glaring, in that typical black mood of his.
Everyone cringing. He wanted an answer. And he wanted
it now. I stood forth and, before any could speak, I
said, in a ringing voice, Who here does not recall
David the son of Jesse of Bethlehem, mighty and
valiant, a man of war, prudent, a comely person, whom
God favored on that day in the Valley of Elah when
Goliath of Gath troubled us with his scorn and his
mockery? Hello! You look stunned.

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DAVID:
You said that? About me?
SATAN:
Its true. Mostly of it. You are valiant. You are
favored by God. Youre all the things I said. More or
less. Listen to me. Those who say the Goliath matter
was a fluke are suffering from a case of the sour
grapes. Truth be told, most of them are northerners.
And we Judah men from the south. Men like you and me.
We know about northerners, dont we? Between you and
me and the lamppost, its a bloody shame what theyre
up to. They know, the longer they keep you from the
court, the sooner people will forget. High time we put
a stop to that. We Judah tribesmen have to stick
together. You follow me?
DAVID:
I. Yes. We do.
SATAN:
I was right. Youre a bright one. You have a ways to
go yet, but you dont babble or interrupt or stare
blankly. You look me in the eye and you listen. Now
the King has a problem. And when he has a problem, we
all have a problem. You follow me?
DAVID:
Yes.
SATAN:
To please the High Priest, King Saul made witchery a
capital crime. Now someones putting a hex on him.
Probably a secret coven doing it out of revenge.
Theres no doubt. A demons after him. At least one.
Possibly two or three. It, or they, come and go. They
appear able to enter and leave at will. When they
enter, hes filled with anger, melancholia and
jealousy. When they depart, hes sweetness, light and
gentle clarity. Its like night and day. I arranged
for you to be Court Musician. Your singular task is to
make music in his presence and repel these demons.
DAVID:
But. But Ive never dealt with spirits before.

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SATAN:
Oh, come on, boy! How hard can it be? Just play a tune
and let the music take effect. Music is from God.
Demons cant abide it. Everyone knows that. It will be
like this. Watch.
(Tilts cup, pours some wine on table)
You see the liquid rushing to cover the table top?
Thats the demons trying to take control.
(Takes a cloth, wipes it up)
This is you. Youre the cloth. Soaking it all up with
your music, wiping away all negative influences. You
follow me? One thing more. Youll be with King Saul.
Every day and all day. How do you feel about that?
DAVID:
It would be a great honor.
SATAN:
People coming, going. You in his constant presence.
DAVID:
Id play my instrument. Clearing the air of evil. So
he could do his work without hostle influence.
SATAN:
Queen enters, accuses a serving girl of putting on
airs. You hear the girls name. A courtier enters,
accuses another of theft. You hear the mans name.
DAVID:
Id play my instrument. And close my ears.
SATAN:
(Tops off cups)
Are you acquainted with the word, opportunity?
DAVID:
Yes. Being Court Musician is an opportunity.
SATAN:
And so it is. There are other kinds of opportunities.
Example. By chance, you overhear two men, and one is
saying, Let us go rob Mister X. Well take his gold
and flee. Would you close your ears?
DAVID:
No! Of course not!
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SATAN:
Of course not. Youd warn the Mister X. And collect a
reward. Hearing the plotters plotting was - DAVID:
An opportunity.
SATAN:
Just so.
DAVID:
But. But I wouldnt do it for the reward. Id do it
because it was the right thing.
SATAN:
David. David. David. This isnt a world of chance
encounters. Things are as they are for a purpose.
The good things and bad that happen arent caused by a
roll of the dice.
DAVID:
Yes, sir. Thats true. Ive read how the Evil One
(SATAN grins slyly at audience)
sets snares and traps to test the unwary. To test our
resolve for following the path of the righteous man.
SATAN:
Exactly. To test. How quickly you come to the point.
You fail the test by doing nothing. You pass by doing
right. And since right acts deserve reward, Mister X
has the opportunity to reward you. That word again.
DAVID:
Yes, good acts are rewarded, bad acts, punished.
Else, thered be no distinguishing good from bad.
SATAN:
Distinguishing good from bad. Why, you have the tongue
of a philosopher, my boy. And its up to man to make
the distinction. God gave man a brain. And He meant
him to use it. You follow?
(Refills cups)
Consider this. A man has an audience with the King. He
denounces a Judah man, a tribesman of ours. He tells
the King our tribesman is a traitor. Treason is
punishable by death. Is this an opportunity? Or is it
by mere chance that you happen to be there to hear?

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DAVID:
Perhaps Im there to. To keep away the bad influences.
Bad influences would cause the King to judge unfairly.
SATAN:
Perhaps. Perhaps. But lets say your presence appears
to be having no effect. The king seems to believe the
other man, putting our tribesmans life in danger.
DAVID:
I wouldnt betray the King. I wouldnt break my oath.
SATAN:
And so our tribesman, whom we are obligated to assist,
and his poor wife and all his children and his
chattels are taken. And never seen again.
DAVID:
Well. May. Maybe he was a traitor. Maybe its true.
I mean its. Its possible.
SATAN:
And over time, it becomes generally known among the
tribe of Judah that you were there and did noth - DAVID:
Stop! This is not good. Why are you saying this?
SATAN:
Oh dear, I seem to have touched a nerve.
DAVID:
Im going to leave.
SATAN:
Stay. Were merely exercising our wits. Playing a game
of what if. No one can hear. Its a secure room.
God can hear.

DAVID:
SATAN:
So he can. So he can. Perhaps hes not listening.
DAVID:
That is impious talk.

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SATAN:
David, just as God gave us hands for grasping at
objects, so He gave us a brain for grasping at truth.
Truth, by its very nature, pushes the envelope. So
what may appear at first to be impiety, may be Gods
creation, man, searching in the tangle of his wits for
truth. Youre a lover of truth, arent you? Youre a
scholar, they tell me. You know the old tales, dont
you? Tales of the march out of Egypt. Sure you do. And
you know who Moses put up front to lead the way, dont
you? Our boys. Judah boys. Under the red lion battle
flag. The toughest of the tough. Fought off the
Egyptians. Took us across that desert. Fought off
those bloody, back-stabbing Amalekites. Led us into
this land. Carved out the living spaces. They did one
hell of a job. All the while, who was bringing up the
rear, stepping in our donkey muck?
(DAVID winces at the foul imagery)
Benjaminites. Sauls tribe. Thats fact. Thats
scripture. Thats Gods truth.
DAVID:
You. Youre twisting words. Youre disrespecting our
King. I shouldnt listen.
SATAN:
(Grasps DAVIDs hands)
Tell you this. This Benjaminite Saul will come to no
good end. This kingship will come to no good end.
Kings and tribal ways are natural enemies. God gave us
tribes. You go against the tribe, you go against God.
(Draws near. His breath on DAVID)
Now remember, whenever you see a Judah man in danger,
its your duty, first and foremost, to help him.
(Suddenly holds DAVIDs hand to the flame)
And if the King asks, did you betray me?
(DAVID yelps in pain, tries pulling it
away)
Answer, boy! Did you betray me?
DAVID:
No! No!

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SATAN:
(Releases hand. DAVID jerks it back)
You see? It didnt hurt.
(Stands. DAVID starts up)
No, stay seated. Its best we dont leave together.
(Tosses badge with chain onto table)
Here. This is your badge. It identifies you as a
King's man. Wear it on your neck at the Palace. The
guards won't let you in without it. A bit of advice.
We had a young fellow your age using his badge to get
girls into bed. Don't do that.
(DAVID pockets badge. SATAN starts toward
door. Stops, does not turn back)
One last thing. In time, Saul may confide in you.
Kings, like all people, get lonely. And when they do,
they unburdon themselves to the people around them,
bodyguards, gardeners, maids, you name it. If that
were to happen with you, please recall the worthy
tribesman who did you this favor. In any case, be at
the Palace tomorrow morning. And dont be late.
(SATAN exits. Silence. DAVID licks burn.
He takes out badge, hangs it by chain from
neck. He holds it in his palm, looks down,
admires it. INNKEEPER enters with SERVING
GIRL. SERVING GIRL has a pitcher of water
and a pan. DAVID starts to stand)
INNKEEPER:
Oh no no, sir. Sit. Sit as long as you wish. Im
just showing the wench the spots that need scrubbing.
DAVID:
You called me sir.
INNKEEPER:
And sir you are. Thats a badge of office you have
there. Youre one of the Kings men. God save him.
DAVID:
Yes. Im one of the Kings men. God save him.
INNKEEPER:
Now just relax, sir. Enjoy your leisure. You dont
have to be anywhere until tomorrow morning.

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DAVID:
How did you know that?
INNKEEPER:
Know what, sir?
DAVID:
That I dont have to be anywhere till tomorrow.
INNKEEPER:
Oh that. I assumed, since you didnt rush out like the
other gentleman. Have you eaten, sir?
DAVID:
(Studies INNKEEPERs face, considers)
Have you any lamb?
INNKEEPER:
Bless you, sir. Ive an unblemished yearling. Freshly
killed and bled. Coming right up, sir. Give me your
cup, sir. Ive a nice wine youll like. Ill fill
your cup personally.
(Snaps fingers)
Sara, attend the gentleman. See to his comforts.
(INNKEEPER exits with DAVIDs cup. SERVING
GIRL bows)
SERVING GIRL:
Wash your feet, sir?
(Fade to black)
End of Act I

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Act II
Act II Scene 1
(At rise: throne room, SAULs Palace. A
large wall mirror. Mandate of Heaven
certificate above throne. SAUL sits on
throne, brooding. SAULS AIDE stands
nearby)
SAUL:
(Stands, goes to mirror, examines himself
critically)
They told me things would improve if I summoned him to
court. They told me, we need some vim, vigor and
pizzazz around here. They said, we have just the guy,
this young war hero. I said, what if he starts
grandstanding? They said, dont worry, it wont
happen, youre the king. I said, I dont know about
this. But they kept saying, dont worry, its a lead
pipe cinch. And I said, I dont know about this. Isnt
that what I said? Isnt it?
SAULS AIDE:
Yes, your highness.
SAUL:
Then someone got the notion to send him to the front.
They said, hes a war hero, isnt he? They said, hes
wasted playing the guitar. Send him out to the army
bases. It'll be a terrific morale booster.
(SATAN quietly enters, straightening his
robe and wiping food from his lips. He
takes his place next to SAULS AIDE)
Itll be in all the papers. Giant Killer Shoots Breeze
With Troops. I said, I dont know about this. They
said, hell knock em dead, its a no brainer. I said,
I dont know about this. Isnt that what I said?
SAULS AIDE:
Yes, your highness.
SATAN:
Uh yes, your highness.

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SAUL:
Suddenly, who knows why, hes out there commanding
troops, winning battles, driving the Amalekites and
Philistines into the sea, recovering lost territory.
In short, becoming a hero all over again. Who
appointed him without consulting me? And now, in the
streets outside, the girls sing a new song, comparing
him to me.
(Enter two GIRLS)
Its starting to get on my nerves.
GIRLS:
(Sings, doing a sword dance)
WE ALL PACKED UP OUR DIDDY BAGS
AND WITH OUR CAPS IN HAND
WE MOUNTED UP OUR DADDYS NAG
AND CROSSED THE BURNING SAND.
WE WENT TO JOIN WITH DAVIDS CREW
ALL GLORY TO THE LORD
RAN THE BAD GUYS THROUGH AN' THROUGH
PUT 'EM TO THE SWORD.
SAUL HAS KILLED HIS THOUSANDS
DAVID LAUGHED AND SPAT
I HAVE KILLED MY TENS OF THOUSANDS
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THAT?
WE FOUGHT EM IN ARABIA
WE FOUGHT EM BY THE SEA
FOUGHT OUR WAY TO AFRICA
AND CAUGHT A CHIMPANZEE.
SAUL HAS KILLED HIS THOUSANDS
DAVID LAUGHED AND SPAT
I HAVE KILLED MY TENS OF THOUSANDS
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THAT?
NOW DAVID TOLD US TO RUN FAST
TO TRAP THE ENEMY
WE SET OUR AMBUSH AT THE PASS
AND WON THE VICTORY

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GIRLS(Cont):
SAUL HAS KILLED HIS THOUSANDS
DAVID LAUGHED AND SPAT
I HAVE KILLED MY TENS OF THOUSANDS
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THAT?
(Exit GIRLS, laughing)
SAUL:
I was right. I was right all along. Well, wasnt I?
SATAN:
(Clears throat)
Its a fad. A passing phase, your grace. Davids
todays flavor, is all. In two weeks, three weeks
tops, everythingll be as before.
(A flourish of trumpets. Door opens with
loud noise. GIRLS enter, strewing flowers.
Enter DAVID in military uniform, shiny
boots & medals on his chest. He is
accompanied by a HOLY MAN in beard and
long flowing robe. DAVID salutes SAUL)
DAVID:
Hail, O King!
(SATAN & SAULS AIDE bow low)
SAUL:
Welcome, David. I must say you surprise us with this
sudden and delightfully unannounced visit. Had we
received advanced notice, we would have had a banquet
prepared in honor of your great and unexpected
victories.
DAVID:
They are not my victories, your royal highness. But
Gods. Any banquet should be in Gods honor.
HOLY MAN:
Amen to that!

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SAUL:
Nevertheless, it amazes us that in such a short time,
youve elevated your station with reference to us from
Court Musician to Army Commander. With overwhelming
victories over our mortal enemies. This is in the
nature of a stroke of good fortune or a happy
conjunction of celestial bodies. As some might say.
DAVID:
Some may say so, my lord. Others, however, would
attribute same to my trust in God to guide my sword
true.
HOLY MAN:
Amen!
DAVID:
Just as He guided that fateful stone from my sling to
the center of Goliaths dome. Someday, I hope to see a
temple erected to His glory.
HOLY MAN:
Amen!
SAUL:
We pray it will be as you say. The events of late
touching on things military have gladdened every heart
in the realm. Return to us this evening and dine with
us and regale us with tales of courage, honor and
derring-do.
DAVID:
As your majesty commands.
(DAVID & HOLY MAN bow and proceed up
an aisle through the THEATRE
AUDIENCE. SATAN clears throat)
SATAN:
Isnt Davids personal piety instructive? You see him
always accompanied by a Holy Man.
SAUL:
Whats that supposed to mean?
SATAN:
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SAUL:
Were you taking a shot at me just now? Was that a
veiled criticism of me for NOT having holy men in the
Palace? Was that your point?
SATAN:
Oh no, your grace. Id never say that.
(HOLY MAN stops at an audience row, passes
a collection basket amongst the THEATRE
AUDIENCE)
SAULS AIDE:
Oh look! Now theyre taking up a collection.
HOLY MAN:
Contribute to the temple fund! Give to the Giant
Killers temple fund!
SAUL:
(Stage whisper, to SATAN & SAUL'S AIDE)
About that giant killer matter, I have my doubts.
Between us, that was a lucky shot. Million to one.
HOLY MAN:
On the contrary, Sir King! It had nothing to do with
luck. It was divine intervention! As it is written.
(Quotes from memory)
Thou hast smitten mine enemies upon the cheek bone, Thou
hast broken the teeth of the ungodly

(Grins in triumph)
Psalm Three, Sir King.
SAUL:
Old man, I think I know a lucky shot when I see one!
HOLY MAN:
Have a care with your words. God may hear.
SAUL:
God doesnt listen. Even if He wanted to, He
couldnt. Its a. Its a what?
SATAN:
A logistical improbability, Highness.
SAUL:
Exactly! A logistical uh. Whatever.
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HOLY MAN:
Oh really? Tell us more.
SAUL:
God is strictly big picture, broad-brush all the way.
SATAN:
Strictly behind-the-scenes. A classic delegator.
SAUL:
Exactly. Look how he works poor old Samuel like a
rented mule!
HOLY MAN:
This is wicked talk! Wicked!
DAVID:
Yes. Wicked, wicked talk.
(Sings)
IF YOU LISTEN TO THE WICKED
IF YOU LISTEN TO THE PROUD
THEY WILL SAY THAT GOD IS DISTANT
THEY WILL SAY HES ON A CLOUD
THEY WILL SAY HES IN HIS HEAVEN
AND HES REALLY QUITE BENIGN
ALL THAT FIRES AN ILLUSION
ALL THAT FIRES IN YOUR MIND
THEY WILL SAY THAT YOURE BEWITCHD
THAT YOURE GOING THROUGH A PHASE
THEY WILL WRITE YOU A PRESCRIPTION
TO DAMPEN DOWN THE BLAZE
BUT I KNOW OF MY GOD
HE IS EVERYWHERE
IF I FLY TO THE MOON
HE WILL FOLLOW ME THERE
IF I RIDE ON THE WIND
HE INHABITS THE AIR
ALL AROUND ME
IF I SINK IN THE SEA
I NEED NEVER DESPAIR
TO THE ENDS OF THE EARTH
HE WILL ANSWER MY PRAYER
HES MY SWORD, HES MY SPEAR
THOUGH A MILLION MAY DARE
TO SURROUND ME
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DAVID(Cont):
HERES A STORY TO CONSIDER
ITS ABOUT A LITTLE BOY
TOOK A PEBBLE FROM THE RIVER
AND GOLIATH WAS DESTROYED
DID THAT PEBBLE FROM THE RIVER
HAVE SOME SACRED QUALITY?
DID THE HAND OF GOD DELIVER,
MAKE IT FLY FROM A TO B?
IF
IF
HE
HE

YOU TRUST HIM TO PROTECT YOU


YOU HONOR ALL HIS WAYS
WILL BE THERE TO DIRECT YOU
WILL GUIDE YOU ALL YOUR DAYS

SO BE ON THE STRAIGHT AND NARROW


IN YOUR DAILY UPS AND DOWNS.
NOT A BOW WITHOUT AN ARROW
(Eyes SAUL)
OR A KING WITHOUT A CROWN.
SAUL:
WHAT did he say?!?
SAULS AIDE:
Peace, your grace, remember your blood pressure.
SAUL:
That traitor! Did you hear him? He took a shot at
me! I was right! Hes after my job!
(SAULS AIDE ducks. SATAN grins, hands
SAUL a spear. SAUL aims it at DAVID)
SAULS AIDE:
Oh no! Here we go again! Another bust up.
HOLY MAN:
(Extends hand to DAVID)
Quick! Grab my hand!
SAUL:
(Hurls spear at DAVID)
You traitor! Take that!

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(DAVID & HOLY MAN exit in a rush. Spear
flies through air, THUNKKK! sticks in
wall. A long silence. Everyone frozen in
place. The eyes of SAULS AIDE fearful,
not knowing what SAUL will do. SATAN
smiles)
SAUL:
(Picks up a rag, wipes his brow)
All right. Come on. Lets get this hall cleaned up.
Its a mess. Who put that spear in the wall?
SAULS AIDE:
Your highness?
SAUL:
I want this hall spic & span. Were having a banquet
tonight in Davids honor. Recognizing his piety and
his military prowess. We need to prepare for it.
SAULS AIDE:
But. But. But, your highness. You just threw that
spear at David. I dont think hes about to.
SAUL:
What are you saying? No no. Youre wrong. Thats
impossible. I did no such thing. Now quickly. Have the
servants clean this place up.
(Starts to exit)
And send the cooks. I want to go over the menu.
(SAUL exits. SAULS AIDE looks quizzically
at SATAN. SATAN grins an evil grin. Fade
to black)
End of Scene

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Act II Scene 2
(At rise: A space, DAVID, HOLY MAN,
WARRIOR 1, WARRIOR 2 sit cross-legged in
circle facing inward. In center, a censer
burns incense. Enter SATAN with book,
stands away)
SATAN:
Davids becoming increasingly religious. Hes
collecting materials for this temple of his. Its an
obsession. He enforces strict rules on his fighters.
(Opens book, reads)
Warriors are spoken of as consecrated, a term which seems
to be connected, not merely with the use of sacred
ceremonies at the opening of a military campaign, but with
the idea that war itself is holy, and the camp of the
warriors, a holy place.

(Lights out on DAVID/WARRIOR space. SATAN


closes book, dons garb of a city elder as
he speaks)
He's up there in the hills with his men. Saul keeps
trying to kill him. Every time he fails, David's story
gets repeated. That's how legends grow.
(Lights up. Main gate of city. Idol of
city god, two unlit candles & two empty
vases on altar. Table, three chairs & open
umbrellas behind two of the chairs. GIRLS
1 & 2 in robes and holding bouquets enter.
They sing & dance before idol)
GIRLS 1 & 2:
O LORD
IN THIS CITY THOU LOVEST
BE THOU AT PEACE
O LORD
IN THY TEMPLE
IN THIS CITY THOU LOVEST
BE THOU AT PEACE
O LORD
IN THY HOUSE
IN THY TEMPLE
IN THIS CITY THOU LOVEST
BE THOU AT PEACE

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GIRLS 1 & 2(Cont):


INTO THY HOUSE
ALL GOOD IS CENTERED
INTO THY HOUSE
THY HANDMAIDS ENTER
INTO THY HOUSE
SEE HOW IT GLISTENS
INTO THY HOUSE
OUR PRAYER, PLEASE LISTEN
AND FROM THY HEART
THOU SPEAKETH TO US
AND FROM THY MOUTH
THOU SPEAKETH TO US
AND FROM THY LIPS
THOU SPEAKETH TO US
FOR THOU LIFTEST UP
THE TORCH OF GOODNESS
EXALT THY HEART
EXALT THY HEART
AND THOU HAST DESTROYED
THE DENS OF EVIL
EXALT THY HEART
EXALT THY HEART
AND THOU RAINEST FIRE
ON THOSE WHO HARM US
EXALT THY HEART
EXALT THY HEART
EXALT THY HEART
THY HEART
(ELDERS 1 & 2 enter, applauding. SATAN
joins them)
ELDER1:
Excellently done, virgins of Bethsaida. Excellent.
(GIRLS 1 & 2 put flowers in vases, light
candles and kneel at altar)
ELDER2:
Our town god is pleased. Such a lovely dance.
Absolutely breathtaking. Wasnt it breathtaking?
SATAN:
It was breathtaking.
(MESSENGER enters, out of breath)
What news?
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MESSENGER:
David approaches.
ELDER2:
We were hopeful he would pass us by. We burned extra
sacrifices for that purpose. Are you certain?
MESSENGER:
He is indeed coming here.
SATAN:
This is very bad. Very bad.
MESSENGER:
He is coming with six hundred picked men.
ELDER1:
Six hundred?!
MESSENGER:
Hes recruited every desperate, debt-ridden, lawless
man in the land. They swear by his name.
(Whispers)
He sacks a town, he causes the homes to be looted, the
bodies to be stripped. He gives everything to his men.
He keeps nothing. They fight like lions for him.
ELDER1:
Oh God help us!
SATAN:
And what other news have you?
MESSENGER:
King Saul has offered to make David his son-in-law.
SATAN:
What?! David? David, a prince?
MESSENGER:
It seems so, my lord. He is on his way to Gibeah with
a dowry to claim the hand of the Princess.
SATAN:
The dowry is no doubt the loot from the cities hes
taken. That hes coming here means he has not yet
looted enough.
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(MESSENGER bows and exits)
ELDER1:
What should we do?
ELDER2:
I say we collect all the gold and silver and have it
ready and waiting for him.
ELDER1:
Thats very sensible. If we voluntarily do it, well
save him the time and trouble. Hell go easy on us.
SATAN:
Are you crazy? Hell think weve got the best hidden
away. Hell torture us to death trying to find it.
ELDER2:
Listen to me. We have no choice. With David, you get
one chance. So many cities has he looted and burned.
(Sings)
YOU GET ONE CHANCE
ITS YOUR MONEY OR YOUR LIFE
YOU GET ONE CHANCE
KEEP YOUR CHATTELS AND YOUR WIFE
DO IT AND SAVE OUR CITY
WELL BE MUCH OBLIGED
BOTCH IT AND MORES THE PITY
KISS IT ALL GOOD-BYE
ELDER1:
YOU GET ONE
EITHER GIVE
YOU GET ONE
HES A WOLF

CHANCE
IT OR HE TAKES
CHANCE
INSIDE A SNAKE

ELDER2:
ONE CHANCE AND OUR WALLS ARE FLAT
ONE CHANCE, WERE ENSLAVED
ELDER1:
ONE CHANCE SPARES OUR ZIGGURAT
ONE CHANCE AND WE'RE OKAY.

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ELDER1:
YOU GET ONE CHANCE
TO SEE OUR CITY THRIVE
ELDER2:
YOU GET ONE CHANCE
TO GET OUT OF THIS ALIVE!
ELDER1 & ELDER2:
IT'S ONE CHANCE TO KEEP ON GROWING
ONE CHANCE FOR THE SEEDS WE'RE SOWING
ONE CHANCE, IT'S SO TOUCH AND GOING
ONE CHANCE, IT'S ALL WE GET!
SATAN:
This has disaster written all over it. I feel it in my
bones. I should never have consented to be a town
elder. I should have stayed a simple jeweler. Davids
going to sack us. And my poor daughter. What of her?
Davids men will ravish her and sell her into slavery.
ELDER2:
Will you shut up?
ELDER1:
We must show him courtesy.
ELDER2:
We must show him all due respect.
SATAN:
He is going to strip us naked. We should fight him.
ELDER1:
When ants come, dont step on them. It angers them.
SATAN:
Davids no ant. We should show him were men. What
will our children think? I say, we close the gates and
prepare a defence.
ELDER1:
Out of the question! No!
ELDER2:
Unthinkable!

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SATAN:
Listen to me! Close the gates. We can only negotiate
from strength.
(To AUDIENCE)
And who knows? A stray arrow shot from the city wall
might find its mark. And bye-bye David.
ELDER2:
No! Youre outvoted.
SATAN:
Then we should recruit an assassin from among our
young men and send him to Davids camp pretending to
be a deserter.
ELDER1:
Stop talking like a fool.
(Indicates idol)
I have faith. Our city god will watch over us.
ELDER2:
Yes! He will give us peace with honor. Peace in our
time.
This is not good.

SATAN:
This is not good at all.

(A trumpet flourish)
ELDER1:
David arrives. Quick! Have the girls receive him.
(ELDER 2 snaps his fingers. A new space
lights up with a table and five chairs.
GIRLS 1 & 2 stand, each goes to a chair &
stands behind it holding up an umbrella
shading it. Enter DAVID & HOLY MAN.
ELDER1, ELDER2 & SATAN kneel)
DAVID:
Thank you, gentlemen.
(ELDERS scoop ashes onto their heads)
ELDER1:
Welcome to our worthless community.

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ELDER2:
Welcome to our poor and unlucky town.
DAVID:
Poor? Worthless? Unlucky? When did this happen?
ELDER1:
The caravans go elsewhere, O David.
ELDER2:
And alas, the wells are running dry.
ELDER1:
People are leaving.
ELDER2:
The tax base has shrunk to a mere fraction.
DAVID:
No, gentlemen. Its seems Im the unlucky one. Every
city I enter claims to be in a deep economic
depression. Am I the harbinger of financial crisis?
Well? And even with this so-called poverty, it seems
you have a jeweler on your town council. And I
understand he does quite well. How can this be? How
could he thrive in such unhappy times? Thats all
right. I didnt expect an answer. Which of you is the
jeweler?
SATAN:
I am, O David.
DAVID:
I understand you counseled resistance.
ELDER2:
It was very wicked of him!
ELDER1:
We overruled him, Lord David!
ELDER2:
We were about to have him executed, Lord David.
DAVID:
Please. Do not call me Lord. I am a man like you.
And no talk of execution. Not on an empty stomach.

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ELDER1:
A thousand pardons, Lord. I mean, O David! Where are
our manners? Please. Sit. We have a meal ready.
(ELDERS indicate chairs where GIRLS 1 & 2
hold umbrellas. DAVID, HOLY MAN sit. The
ELDERS & SATAN sit in the other chairs)
ELDER1:
You see? Our daughters provide shade for you.
DAVID:
Lovely.
ELDER2:
And the women have prepared a feast as you have
never - (HOLY MAN dozes off in chair)
DAVID:
Feast? I thought you said you were poor.
ELDER1:
We are, but - DAVID:
Gentlemen, I have 600 hungry men. Feed them first.
ELDER2:
But - DAVID:
Feed them, or youll see firsthand how worthless
this false god of yours is.
ELDER1:
Yes, O David. Immediately.
DAVID:
Jeweler. Yes, you. Stay.
(ELDER1 & ELDER2 exit, frightened)
Theres an old Edomite saying, keep your friends
close, your enemies closer. Sound advice. Youre a
fighter. I like fighters. Youre with me.
(GIRL2 behind DAVID gasps)
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SATAN:
O David, I have a wife and children.
DAVID:
They'll get along fine without you.
SATAN:
My father just passed away. Let me go bury him first.
(HOLY MAN suddenly awakens)
HOLY MAN:
Let the dead bury the dead!
SATAN:
And my poor daughter.
DAVID:
Its fixed with a nail, jeweler. Youre Davids man.
Get used to it. Is this your daughter behind me?
SATAN:
Yes, O David.
DAVID:
Have her come around front where I can view her.
(SATAN nods to GIRL2, who comes to the
front)
Whats your name, girl?
SATAN:
Sefira, O David.
DAVID:
Let her speak. What is your name?
GIRL2:
Sefira, my lord.
DAVID:
(Hes visibly attracted. SATAN sees this)
Don't call me Lord. Sefira. That's a Moabite name.
GIRL2:
Yes, my lor - - I mean, yes sir.

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DAVID:
My great-grandmother was Moabite. My fathers
grandmother. The Lady Ruth.
SATAN:
Oh, the Lady Ruths name is famous in Moab. Famous!
The Lady Ruth was known for her beauty. As is my
daughter, who is fourteen, and the apple of my eye.
DAVID:
Indeed she is. Tell me, Sefira. Are you spoken for?
SATAN:
She has no fianc, O David. Im a modern man. Not like
the traditional ones. My intention is to permit my
daughter to make her own choices in life.
DAVID:
A revolutionary concept. Most forward thinking of
you. Is this true, Sefira?
SATAN:
It is true. I swear by the hands of our town god!
DAVID:
Let her speak.
GIRL2:
Yes. Its. Its true. Im not betrothed, sir.
SATAN:
But soon she will be. For she is most accomplished, O
David. Skilled in all the feminine arts.
(HOLY MAN suddenly awakens)
HOLY MAN:
Arts, bah! Feminine wiles! They are not arts, but
wiles!
DAVID:
Peace, padre, peace.
(HOLY MAN smiles weakly, dozes back off)

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SATAN:
A pity you were not here earlier. You would have seen
her dance, heard her sing. Be assured it was a
breathtaking exhibition. Even. Dare I say it? Angelic.
(She blushes)
I know this. Any day now, a superlative suitor will
come and claim her. Only a matter of time.
(He takes out a diamond and a silver ring
missing its stone)
Think of my dear Sefira as a fine polished diamond
lacking only a worthy mounting.
(SATAN sets diamond in ring, offers it to
DAVID, who takes it)
DAVID:
Somehow, I get the impression this is all being said
for my benefit.
SATAN:
Heaven forbid, O David. Think in terms of a proud
parent waxing eloquent on the virtues of a child. It
is nothing more than that.
DAVID:
Just as well. A moot point anyway. Im pledged to the
Royal Princess. In fact, Im on my way to wed her.
SATAN:
(Pretending he doesnt already know)
Oh! Congratulations, O David!
DAVID:
Im to be the Kings son-in-law.
SATAN:
King Sauls daughters husband. A high honor. Youll
be like his son. Almost.
DAVID:
Almost? What do you mean almost, jeweler?
SATAN:
Oh. I. I meant his majesty has four sons. Fruit of the
royal loins. I was merely expressing regret that the
most able man in the realm, yourself, will have no
hope of ever wearing the crown.

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(DAVID silently glares at SATAN)
SATAN:
But perhaps, after you perform your duty with respect
to the Princess, your son will have a claim to the
throne. If the Princess bears you a son. But having
sons is such an iffy matter. God knows I've tried.
(HOLY MAN suddenly awakens)
HOLY MAN:
Happy the man whose wife gives him sons!
SATAN:
Is your espoused the elder or younger daughter?
DAVID:
The younger.
SATAN:
The younger. Hmmm. Well. One can always hope for a
miracle. Gods ways are unfathomable.
HOLY MAN:
Amen to that!
(HOLY MAN dozes off again)
SATAN:
Still, for a man like yourself, its hard to see any
advantage.
DAVID:
(Takes out his sword. GIRLS 1 & 2 gasp)
You speak too boldly for a mere jeweler!
SATAN:
A thousand pardons, O David! Forgive me. I spoke as
I did because you are a well-known lover of truth.
DAVID:
(Sword pointed at SATANs throat)
I love truth, but the truth you pursue wends its way
through marsh and quicksand. Say straight what you
mean and do not stray from the beaten path.

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SATAN:
O David! Please! Its difficult to speak ones mind
with a sword at ones throat!
DAVID:
And nigh impossible with ones throat cut through!
SATAN:
Yes. Yes, all right. Only please dont chop my head
off. You. You said with reference to this unworthy
one, keep your friends close, your enemies closer. But
is that not the kings strategem? By marrying you to
the princess, is his intention not to keep you close
at hand?
DAVID:
(Withdraws sword slightly)
Go on.
SATAN:
In the hills with your men, you are a dread force. You
strike where you will, take what you want. All, great
and small, fear you. But at the palace, youll be
alone, beholden to the King and his daughter. And her
brothers. For the food on your plate. For the strings
of your harp. For the cloak on your back.
DAVID:
Then what is your advice, jeweler?
SATAN:
You are David. David needs no link to royal blood.
Davids blood is richer by far.
DAVID:
You have a gift for flattery, jeweler. If not the
Princess, who then should I marry?
SATAN:
Why, whoever you wish.
DAVID:
What should I do with the dowry I've gathered?
SATAN:
Why, keep it. Or give it to the poor.

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Really.

DAVID:
And what have I gathered?

SATAN:
Riches beyond counting. Gold, silver, jewels. The loot
of a hundred sacked cities. I can imagine a sum
sufficient to ransom a princess. Perhaps a king.
DAVID:
And youve seen this with your own eyes?
SATAN:
One can only assume.
DAVID:
(Puts sword away)
Well. You know what they say about assuming. Sefira,
would you like to see this dowry?
GIRL2:
Oh yes, sir!
(DAVID snaps his fingers. The HOLY MAN,
suddenly awake again, takes a large
bag from the floor and holds it up)
DAVID:
Not gold. Not silver. Not diamonds. If it were these,
the bag would be too heavy for him. These are
foreskins cut from dead Philistines.
(SATAN blanches. GIRL2s eyes express
shock)
The price the King set for the Princess hand in
marriage was one hundred. Im bringing two hundred
just to be on the safe side. Tell me, Sefira. How
would you feel if your beau brought you these as a
token of his affection?
(GIRL2 puts hands over mouth as if about
to vomit, runs from table. GIRL1 follows.
Both GIRLS exit. SATAN hangs his head in
defeat. Fade to black)
End of Scene

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Act II Scene 3
(At rise: WARRIOR1 & WARRIOR2 sit in
meditation. Between them, a censer burns
incense. Enter SATAN in black robe)
SATAN:
Hes gaining strength. I can feel his confidence and
his certitude building day by day.
(DAVID enters with HOLY MAN. WARRIOR1 &
WARRIOR rise. DAVID gives each a gift,
hugs them. WARRIOR1 & WARRIOR2 salute)
He rewards his warriors. They in turn pledge their
lives and honor to him. They spread his holy war with
zeal.
(WARRIOR1 & WARRIOR2 exit)
That matter about the foreskins. Did you detect the
mocking tone in his voice? You did? So did I. It
wasnt done for our benefit, but for Sauls. He knows
Saul has spies. He knows Saul will hear long before
David arrives at court. The fact of the matter is,
(Drawing closer to AUDIENCE, as if to share
a secret with them)
Saul never planned to wed his daughter to David. He
thought he wouldnt have to. He assumed one of those
Philistines would kill David. After all, a man doesnt
let another man take a knife to his family jewels
without a fight. David knew it was Sauls plan that he
should die. Oh, by the way, speaking of Saul, seems
the Philistines have finally turned the tables on him.
They have him cornered up north at Jezreel.
(Fade to black. Lights up. Enter NASIB, a
Philistine military officer. He practices
sword thrusts. Enter ABIMELECH)
ABIMELECH:
Is that Nasib? Just pathetic! I tell you, theyll
let just about anyone join the Philistine Army.
NASIB:
Abimelech! You son of a gun! Good to see you!
ABIMELECH:
How are you? Just arrived. My men and I escorted
King Achishs brigade up from Gath. Boring work.

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NASIB:
Boredoms over, pal. We got King Saul trapped up
ahead. Were tightening the noose. And this time were
doing it right. No more Goliaths or any giants. Just
plain old time-tested military tactics.
ABIMELECH:
Speaking of giants, guess who was with Achish? David.
NASIB:
David's with us? I thought he was Sauls son-in-law.
ABIMELECH:
Hes still married to the Princess. But it doesnt
matter. Saul keeps trying to kill him. Anyway, when
the C.O. saw David and Achish together, he went
ballistic, gave David five seconds to scram. Achish
got his butt chewed. Only thing that saved David from
imprisonment or worse was hes King Achishs friend.
NASIB:
Really odd about Achish and David.
ABIMELECH:
Two bugs in a rug. Achish gives David sanctuary in his
city, Gath. David uses Gath for raids. David repays
with loot. All very neat. All very hush-hush.
(Sings)
NOW THIS IS STRICTLY HEARSAY
BUT OH HOW TRUE IT RINGS
AND DONT YOU DARE REPEAT IT
DONT YOU SAY A THING
A FILE STAMPED TOP SECRET
WITH DAVIDS NAME INSIDE
THEREIN REPORTS OF MURDER
HINTS OF GENOCIDE
ITS DAVIDS BAND OF BULLIES
THEYRE STIRRING UP A FIGHT
NO ONE TALKS ABOUT IT
NOTHING COMES TO LIGHT
NASIB:
ITS ALL BECAUSE OF THIS
THIS QUEER COVERT BUSINESS
DAVID AND KING ACHISH
MAKE A STRANGE SYNTHESIS
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ABIMELECH:
WHEN ACHISH FIRST SAW DAVID, DID HE SAY THIS TO HIS
MAN
TELL ME WHOS THAT LOVELY LAD WITH BLOODSTAINS ON HIS
HAND
AND TELL ME DID HE LEARN HIS TRADE FROM SOME TRAGEDIAN
WHEN ACHISH FIRST SAW DAVID, IT WAS HOW THE STORY RAN.
NASIB:
WHEN ACHISH FIRST SAW DAVID, DID HE MARVEL AT THE
SIGHT
WHEN DAVID STRUMMED HIS LYRE, DID HE SHIVER WITH
DELIGHT
WHEN DAVID WAXED POETIC, DID HIS REASONING TAKE FLIGHT
WHEN ACHISH FIRST SAW DAVID, WAS IT, THATS MY
MISTER RIGHT!
ABIMELECH:
WHEN ACHISH FIRST SAW DAVID, DID HE WITH HIS HEART
DEBATE
DID HE WRESTLE WITH HIS VIRTUE, DID HE ARGUE WITH HIS
FATE
WHEN DAVID SANG A BALLAD, DID HIS HEARTBEAT PALPITATE
WHEN ACHISH FIRST SAW DAVID, DID HE SEE A NEW
SOULMATE?
NASIB & ABIMELECH:
WHEN ACHISH FIRST SAW DAVID, DID HE MARVEL AT HIS LUCK
WITH DAVIDS STAR A'RISING AND KING SAUL'S DOWN IN THE
MUCK
WITH DAVID LIKE AN EAGLE AND OLD SAUL A SITTING DUCK
WHEN ACHISH FIRST SAW DAVID, WAS HE WONDROUSLY
AWESTRUCK?
NASIB:
Theres one other thing.
ABIMELECH:
Indeed?
NASIB:
Their shaman, Samuel, before he died, annointed David.
ABIMELECH:
Ye Gods! The priests opposed to Saul? And two
annointings? Two kings? Thats crazy!

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NASIB:
If its so, it means David has designs on the crown.
It explains all this talk of building a temple. Hes
whipping the people up for holy war.
ABIMELECH:
And hes using us to topple Saul. A game within a
game. I dont like being used.
NASIB:
Ah! No more politics. Come on, my friend. Forget about
David. Lets focus on King Saul!
ABIMELECH:
Yes! Poor Saul! A dead man. He just doesnt know it.
(They exit. Fade to black. Lights up.
PSYCHICs home at Endor near battlefield.
Her homes represented by door and table,
three chairs, large occult artwork hanging
on wall. PSYCHIC sits in chair, knitting.
DAUGHTER does housework. Enter SATAN,
dressed again as a court official)
SATAN:
(Map appears. Sound of a distant rumbling
which continues to end of scene)
So here we are at Mount Gilboa. The Philistine
Confederacy in a united front to defeat Saul once and
for all. The Philistines are at Shunem, here. Sauls
camp is here at Jezreel. Philistine reinforcements are
pouring in. Hebrew morale is dropping. Sauls priests
have packed up and fled. Soldiers are starting to
desert. Saul is desperate. He needs to know Gods
Will. As fate would have it, one of his chief aides
has been secretly protecting a witch. Shed been his
lover and the mother of his child. She lives seven
miles from Jezreel at Endor, right here.
(Map disappears. Exit SATAN. Enter SAULS
AIDE, dusty from a long walk)
DAUGHTER:
Papa! Its Papa! Mama, come quick! Look, its Papa!
SAULS AIDE:
Oh precious. So good to see you. Such a big girl.
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DAUGHTER:
Are you going to stay, Papa? Are you?
SAULS AIDE:
I must talk to your mommy, precious.
DAUGHTER:
I want you to stay!
SAULS AIDE:
Look what I brought you.
DAUGHTER:
Oh, thank you, Papa! Mama, look what Papa gave me!
PSYCHIC:
Thats nice, dear. Now go to your room.
DAUGHTER:
Can I come down later?
PSYCHIC:
Of course, dear. Now go.
(DAUGHTER exits)
SAULS AIDE:
Shes growing like a weed.
PSYCHIC:
Shes ten now.
SAULS AIDE:
Seems just yesterday she was so - (He stops himself)
How are you getting on?
PSYCHIC:
Good. And you?
SAULS AIDE:
Good.
PSYCHIC:
I got the wheat and the beans. Thank you for that.
SAULS AIDE:
And the lamb?
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PSYCHIC:
Already slaughtered. Your little girl stuffed
herself. Are you staying the night?
SAULS AIDE:
I have to tie up some loose ends. Ill be back later.
PSYCHIC:
I want you to stay the night. That distant rumbling
frightens her. And me.
SAULS AIDE:
Youre to have a visitor.
PSYCHIC:
When?
SAULS AIDE:
Soon. Very soon.
PSYCHIC:
Who?
SAULS AIDE:
An important man. Hell ask you to use your conjuring
skills.
PSYCHIC:
Oh God! You didnt! You didnt tell about me! Did you?
SAULS AIDE:
Its for the country. For our countrys sake.
PSYCHIC:
But the Kings law!
SAULS AIDE:
You wont be arrested.
PSYCHIC:
What does he want?
SAULS AIDE 2:
Just do as he asks.

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PSYCHIC:
Who is he?
(SAUL'S AIDE 2 kisses her passionately)
Who is he?
(SAUL'S AIDE 2 exits)
Come back soon! What does he think? Do they think
its a matter of waving my arms and poof? Like
anything, to do it right, you need preparation.
(Sings)
DO THEY THINK ITS A MATTER OF SNAPPING MY FINGERS
DO THEY THINK ITS A MATTER OF TAPPING ON A POST
DO THEY THINK ITS A MATTER OF RECITING A JINGLE
ITS A REALLY HARD BUSINESS TO CONJURE A GHOST
DO THEY KNOW WHATS REQUIRED IN MOUNTING A BROOMSTICK
DO THEY KNOW WHATS REQUIRED IN GETTING THE MOST
DO THEY KNOW WHATS REQUIRED IN WORKING THE MAGIC
ITS A REALLY HARD BUSINESS TO CONJURE A GHOST
YOU
YOU
YOU
YOU

MUST
NEED
MUST
NEED

CONTROL YOUR BREATHING


TO BE RELAXED
CONTROL YOUR EATING
YOUR TUMMY FLAT.

YOU
YOU
YOU
YOU

MUST
NEED
MUST
NEED

CONTROL YOUR THINKING


TO BE DETACHED
CONTROL YOUR BLINKING
TO FOCUS AT. AT. AT. AT. AT.

THEN
THEN
THEN
ITS

YOU FEEL
YOU FEEL
YOU FEEL
A REALLY

THAT
THAT
THAT
HARD

YOUR BODY HAS SURRENDERED TO SPIRIT


YOUR BODY IS BECOMING A HOST
YOUR BODY IS POSSESSED BY ANOTHER
BUSINESS TO CONJURE A GHOST.

(PSYCHIC starts to collect herbs. Enter


SAUL in disguise, SATAN dressed as a court
official & GENERAL in military garb)
PSYCHIC:
Welcome to Endor, sirs.
SATAN:
Are you the witch?
PSYCHIC:
I was once referred to as such. But nowadays I obey
the King's law to the letter.

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DAUGHTERS VOICE:
Mommy? Whos there? Can I come down?
PSYCHIC:
No, dear. Stay in your room. Come and sit, sirs.
(They sit. PSYCHIC begins pouring tea)
I was told to expect you. How may I serve?
SATAN:
My master will ask you to conjure a spirit. We are
unfamiliar with the conjuring methodology. Is it done
sitting or standing?
PSYCHIC:
It can be done either way, sir. I would prefer to sit.
SATAN:
Let her have your chair, General.
(GENERAL scowls, stands, gives his chair to
PSYCHIC, stands behind her. PSYCHIC sits)
Are you comfortable now?
PSYCHIC:
Yes, sir.
SATAN:
Very well. Ready, sir.
SAUL:
Do you know who I am?
PSYCHIC:
No, sir.
SAUL:
What you are about to do will directly impact our
countrys future. You love your country, dont you?
PSYCHIC:
Yes, sir.
SAUL:
Very well. Then do this. Conjure up the spirit of
the recently-deceased prophet and high priest.
PSYCHIC:
You mean Samuel?!?

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SAUL:
I mean none other.
PSYCHIC:
That could be very dangerous, sir.
SAUL:
Nevertheless. Do it.
(She goes into trance. SAMUEL enters. SAUL
gasps at the sight, kneels)
SAMUEL:
Saul! Why have you disturbed me? What do you want?
SAUL:
The Philistines are attacking in great force. The Lord
God doesnt answer me. Neither by prophets, nor by
dreams. So I called you. I must know.
SAMUEL:
If God has left you, what can I do?
SAUL:
You can talk to Him. He listens to you.
SAMUEL:
No!
SAUL:
Damn it! Im ordering you to!
SAMUEL:
Don't order me, little man! I don't work for you. If
you must know, here's how it is. The Lord has departed
from you. He's now your enemy. He's in the process of
taking the crown from you and giving it to David.
SAUL:
David?!
SAMUEL:
Because you failed Him! Oh yes, you failed Him. He
gave you a plan to defeat the Amalekites. You failed
to execute His plan. After that, He lost confidence in
you. Now Satan is with you
(SAMUEL looks at SATAN)
and very soon you will be lost. Farewell!
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(SAMUEL exits)
SAUL:
(Looking around panicky)
Did he say Satan is with me?
SATAN:
Uh. He meant it metaphorically, your highness.
SAUL:
I cant believe it. Its over. I. Im ruined.
(SATAN snaps his fingers over GENERALs
head. SATAN smiles knowingly at AUDIENCE)
GENERAL:
How do we know this is real?
SAUL:
What do you mean?
GENERAL:
Do you think the likes of this woman can conjure up a
high priests ghost at the snap of a finger?
SAUL:
That was Samuel. Id swear to it. That was Samuel.
GENERAL:
Was it? Was it? Your highness. Please think about your
mental state after walking seven miles, slipping past
enemy pickets and scouts, to get here to Endor. Youre
fatigued. You havent eaten.
SAUL:
Yes, youre right.
GENERAL:
Youre on edge.
SAUL:
Yes. I am.
GENERAL:
You need sleep. But you cant for theres a battle to
be fought. Enter this quote witch. In your state,
Highness, youre open to the power of suggestion.
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SAUL:
I will admit its possible.
GENERAL:
More than possible! What you saw was not Samuel.
SATAN:
Then who or what was it?
GENERAL:
A devil, a demon, a phantom, a figment.
(A hard look at SATAN)
Your friend was protecting this woman.
SATAN:
Not my friend. Just a work mate. I never trusted him.
GENERAL:
The perfect plot. This quote work mate and the woman.
And a figment of Samuel rising from the mist babbling
its over, its all over. All very convincing. Too
convincing. I say this is Davids work.
SATAN:
(Grinning at AUDIENCE)
David?! Why David?
GENERAL:
Who has means? Who has motive? Who has opportunity? It
almost worked. The kingdoms in danger. With your
consent, Oh King, put me in charge now.
SAUL:
Well, yes! Yes, of course! Take charge!
GENERAL:
I must get you back to the command center ASAP. I
have intelligence that David is in the Philistine camp
as King Achish guest. Davids using the Philistines
and witchcraft. Hes worse than Satan.
(SATAN can barely contain his joy)
Well surprise him tomorrow. Well shock him.
(Hands a dagger to SATAN)
Wait here. When he returns, exact vengeance on that
traitor. And on anyone else you deem necessary.
(SAUL & GENERAL exit. PSYCHIC awakens)
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PSYCHIC:
Oh. I had a horrible dream.
SATAN:
Weve all had horrible dreams. Have you any food?
PSYCHIC:
(Sees dagger, a look of dread)
I. I have some leftover lamb. And some beans.
SATAN:
Go prepare it. Im hungry. Be quick about it. And
bring your daughter down here.
(Fade to black)
End of Scene

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Act II Scene 4
(At Rise: SATAN in black robe on bare
stage, whistling, cleaning knife. Enter
AMALEKITE in with unfolded map and
carrying a hatbox. He is lost)
AMALEKITE:
Sir! Excuse me, sir!
SATAN:
Yes?
AMALEKITE:
Im a poor wandering Amalekite. I seem to have lost my
way. Im trying to find Ziklag.
SATAN:
Ziklag? Why do you want to go to Ziklag of all places?
AMALEKITE:
It. Its personal, sir.
SATAN:
Well. If youre not going to tell me why, then I see
no reason to tell you where.
AMALEKITE:
All right, sir. Ill tell you. But you must promise to
repeat it to no one. Swear it.
SATAN:
I swear on my black robe.
AMALEKITE:
Thats good enough for me. In fact, Im on my way to
Ziklag to see Lord David.
(Indicates hatbox)
I have a gift and an important message for him.
SATAN:
Lord David, you say. Well, that changes everything.
Look, Im sorry I was rude. Of course, Ill show you
where Ziklag is. Bring the map over here.
(AMALEKITE hands it to SATAN but keeps his
distance. SATAN spreads map out, scans it)
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SATAN:
Ah! See? Heres where we are.
Lachish River, here, and its
along this secondary road, to
away to see. Come close. Look

Now you cross the


another seven miles
here. Youre too far
where I'm pointing.

(SATAN stabs him, he dies. Fade to black.


Lights up on Command Center. Large
military map of Israel & Davids star on
wall. ELEAZAR, JASHEN & URIAH at the conn.
A SOLDIER stands guard. SATAN enters
wearing the AMALEKITEs clothes, holding
the hatbox. He keeps his distance)
SATAN:
When David was sent away from the Philistine camp,
just prior to the big battle, he and his men headed
south to his base at Ziklag, near King Achishs city
of Gath. He found Ziklag burned and looted and all the
goods and women taken away by Amalekite raiders. David
gave chase, caught up with them as they were dividing
the spoils. He rescued the women, including his two
wives, Ahinoam and Abigail. The Amalekites were
killed. But a few managed to escape and go north.
(DAVID enters, in a General's uniform)
VOICE OVER INTERCOM:
Attention all hands! Captains on the bridge!
(Everyone comes to attention)
ELEAZAR:
Sir!
DAVID:
As you were, men. How goes it, Colonel Eleazar?
ELEAZAR:
Another long watch, sir.
(Enter MESSENGER. He salutes)
What news?
MESSENGER:
Its still a total news blackout up north.
JASHEN:
Philistine blackout. That bodes ill for Saul.
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URIAH:
The battle may yet be raging and not yet decided.
ELEAZAR:
Doubtful, Colonel Uriah. Two day battles are rare.
(To MESSENGER)
If our scouts encounter anyone coming from the the
Mount Gilboa area up north, bring him to me.
MESSENGER:
Yes, sir.
(MESSENGER salutes and exits)
ELEAZAR:
Nevertheless, I do think its over. Over for Saul.
And over for the tribe of Benjamin, My Lord David.
DAVID:
Dont call me Lord. There is only one Lord God.
(Sings)
IM NOT YOUR LORD, IM JUST A MAN
LIKE I ALWAYS BEEN
IM NOT SOME GOD COME DOWN TO EARTH
TO BE YOUR FRIEND
I CANT CHANGE WATER INTO WHISKEY,
SCOTCH OR GIN
AN I AIN'T GONNA TALK ABOUT PEACE ON EARTH
GOOD WILL TOWARD MEN
CAUSE IM NO ONE SPECIAL

IM JUST LIKE YOU


IM NO ONE SPECIAL
JUST A HEBREW, THROUGH AND THROUGH
JUST LIKE MY KINFOLK
I'M THE REAL MCCOY
IM NO ONE SPECIAL
JUST A BETHLEHEM BOY
FROM BETHLEHEM THATS WHERE IM FROM
WHERE MY SEED WAS SOWED
IM JUST AN AVERAGE, HAPPY-GO-LUCKY
SO-AND-SO
IF YOU DONT LIKE ME, WALK AWAY,
LEAVE ME ALONE
FROM BETHLEHEM THATS WHERE IM FROM
THATS WHERE ILL GO

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DAVID(Cont):
AN IM NO ONE SPECIAL
IM JUST LIKE YOU
IM NO ONE SPECIAL
JUST A HEBREW, THROUGH AND THROUGH
JUST LIKE MY KINFOLK
I'M THE REAL MCCOY
IM NO ONE SPECIAL
JUST A BETHLEHEM BOY
(DAVID exits)
VOICE OVER INTERCOM:
Attention all hands! Captains departed the bridge!
(SATAN begins to draw close)
SOLDIER:
You there! Who do you think you are?
SATAN:
An Amalekite. Resting my camel after a long trip from
up north. I've a gift for Lord David. Ive come from
Mount Gilboa to give it to him.
SOLDIER:
From up north, you say? Mount Gilboa? Colonel Eleazar
wants to have a chat with you. Assume the position!
SATAN:
Aye, sir.
(SATAN turns his back, raises hands.
SOLDIER searches him, finds knife, throws
it off to the side. Then they enter
Command Center, the SOLDIER pushing SATAN
ahead of him)
ELEAZAR:
Who is this?
SOLDIER:
Sir, he was coming from the north.
ELEAZAR:
From the north. And what says he?
SOLDIER:
He bears gifts and tidings for Lord David.
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JASHEN:
These days, all bear gifts and tidings for Lord David.
ELEAZAR:
Whats in the hatbox?
SOLDIER:
I did not look, sir. He says its a gift.
JASHEN:
He looks like someone up to no good. Whats in the
box? Give it over!
(JASHEN tries snatching it. SATAN resists.
SOLDIER pulls SATAN away, puts a knife to
his throat. JASHEN takes box, opens it,
peers inside, drops box with a clang)
Oh, Good Lord!
ELEAZAR:
What is it?
JASHEN:
Its Saul's crown.
URIAH:
The crown!?
(All move away from box, as if it were
dangerous to be near it)
How did a dirty thief like you get the royal crown?
(SATAN is silent. SOLDIERs presses knife
tighter against SATANs throat)
SATAN:
Mercy! Have mercy on a poor sojourner!
ELEAZAR:
Sojourner, my ass! Youre an Amalekite, which means
youre a bandit and a bushwhacker.
JASHEN:
How did you get this?
SATAN:
My Lords, I swear on Lord David's name - JASHEN:
You swear on nothing! You're an abortion!
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(Enter DAVID in robe and slippers)
VOICE OVER INTERCOM:
Attention all hands! Captains on the bridge!
ELEAZAR:
Sir!
DAVID:
As you were, gentlemen. Can we belay the chatter? I
cant sleep. Well well, a guest.
ELEAZAR:
We were interrogating him, sir.
DAVID:
He brought us information?
ELEAZAR:
He brought us an object.
(DAVID goes to box, opens it)
DAVID:
Why didnt you awaken me?
ELEAZAR:
We were about to, sir.
DAVID:
Leave us. Leave us this instant!
(ELEAZAR, JASHEN, URIAH, SOLDIER exit.
DAVID pours wine into a cup)
Drink.
SATAN:
Thank you, My Lord.
DAVID:
Dont call me Lord. You look familiar. Do I know you
from somewhere?
SATAN:
I can't see how you could, Sir.
DAVID:
From where do you come?

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SATAN:
From Mount Gilboa.
DAVID:
But you dont live up there. You dont speak the
lingo. You were up north at the battle. Strange. The
Philistines dont usually recruit and bushwhackers.
SATAN:
Please dont insult me, sir.
DAVID:
How did the crown of Saul end up with you?
SATAN:
I was not with the Philistines. I was there by chance.
DAVID:
I see. Were you coming from the north or south?
SATAN:
From the south. Heading north. I saw many dead
Israelites. Those not dead or dying were fleeing,
pursued by Philistines.
DAVID:
A sad, sad day for our king.
SATAN:
And I saw the King himself. There were horsemen and
chariots at a distance making ready to oppose him. His
own guardsmen had run off. The King shouted to me,
You there! Yes, you! Come here! Come and kill me,
lest they drag me in chains to Gath and Askalon. I
will give you my crown as a reward. Id rather an
Amalekite had it than the Philistines.
DAVID:
And did you?
SATAN:
I did as he commanded.
DAVID:
It didnt disturb you killing the Lords Annointed?
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SATAN:
I did as I was commanded. Not for revenge, or for
loot. But nevertheless, there's a fateful connection,
relating to your situation. Central to my thinking was
this. He was my Lord David's foe, aiming to effect his
death. And now with King Saul gone, there is a void
needing to be filled. You know the saying, nature
hates a vacuum.
(Sings)
THE POPULATION TREMBLES, THEY DO GROVEL IN THEIR DREAD
THEY WANT A CALL FOR ACTION FROM THE LEADER TO THE LED
ITS TIME TO FLY YOUR BANNER AND WHEN ALL IS DONE AND
SAID
ITS TIME TO GO AND DO IT, PUT THE CROWN UPON YOUR
HEAD.
SET IT ON YOUR CURLY LOCKS
FEEL IT RESTING THERE
LOOK AROUND YOU, SEE THEM GAWK
SEE THEM STAND AND STARE
THE TIMID MAN THREW DOWN HIS SWORD AND FROM THE FIELD
FLED
THE TOWNSMAN BURIES ALL HIS GOLD AND HIDES BENEATH THE
BED
BUT YOU, MY LORD, DO GO THE WAY THAT ANGELS FEAR TO
TREAD
SO GO AHEAD AND DO IT, PUT THE CROWN UPON YOUR HEAD.
DAVID:
I say again, do not call me Lord. Youre expecting a
reward. Even now, youre imagining the gold jingling
in your purse. Already youve decided how to spend it.
SATAN:
(Prostrates himself. Head on floor)
O David, Master. Lord. You read my mind so clearly.
You see all. Nothing is hidden. Youre like God.
DAVID:
Stop!

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SATAN:
You have the face of a God. You are God! You now have
the crown, thanks to your poor servant. You now know
Saul is sleeping with his ancestors. The Philistine
plan is to keep the fact of Sauls death secret until
all is in place to assure victory. But now you know.
Now is the time to strike. You know the Jews will
fight like lions for you. Put the crown on your head
and show yourself to them and say what must be said.
Proclaim yourself! Do it now!
DAVID:
Stop! Stop it!
SATAN:
Lord! The Philistines will move slowly, cautiously,
unaware you are lighting a fire under the twelve
tribes, a fire to resound from Damascus to Babylon to
Egypt. Strike now, Lord! For the window will not be
open long! Put the crown on, Lord David! Let the world
know you are King and Lord and God!
(DAVID takes his sword and
plunges it many times into SATAN)
DAVID:
(Screaming as he stabs)
Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop!
(DAVID holds it up, watching blood drip off
it. ELEAZAR, JASHEN, URIAH & SOLDIER enter
on the run, weapons drawn, pull DAVID back)
ELEAZAR:
Hes dead.
DAVID:
He was at the battle. Hiding in the bushes. He waited
for it to be over. Then he crept forward and spied our
king lying dead. He scooped up the crown and fled
south. He expected a reward.
ELEAZAR:
Typical rat.
URIAH:
Typical cockroach.
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JASHEN:
Typical snake.
(DAVID takes crown, hefts it in his hand,
studies it, deep in thought)
DAVID:
What should be done with this?
URIAH:
(Sings, reggae style)
DESE MANY YEARS I FIGHT FOR YOU, NO PILLOW AN' NO BED.
YOU RUN TO HERE, I RUN TO DERE, SLEEP ON DA GROUND
INSTEAD
IF YOU BE KING, I GET A HOME, A PLACE TO CALL MY
SPREAD
SO GO AHEAD AN DO IT, PUT DA CROWN UPON YOUR HEAD
ELEAZAR:
I BE NOT RICH OR FAMOUS, AN NO NOBLE WAS I BRED
GO PUT DIS DOWN ON PAPER DAT NO BLUE BLOOD HAVE I BLED
IF YOU BE KING, DARISTOCRATS, DEY RAGE, DEY ALL SEE
RED
SO GO AHEAD AN DO IT, PUT DA CROWN UPON YOUR HEAD
JASHEN:
A GIRL I FANCY IN THE TOWN, YOURE NOT FOR ME, SHE
SAID
HER DADDY SORE, HE SAY TO ME, I SOONER SEE HER DEAD
IF YOU BE KING, I KNOW DAT I WOULD STAND IN HIS GOOD
STEAD
SO GO AHEAD AN DO IT, PUT DA CROWN UPON YOUR HEAD
ELEAZAR, JASHEN, URIAH & SOLDIER:
SEE IT GRACE YOUR CURLY LOCKS
AS YOU WALK ON AIR
THINK IT LIKE A BLUE-CHIP STOCK
AN' YOU A BILLIONAIRE
FAIR BE FAIR, WE BEGGIN YOU TO GIVE OUR DAILY BREAD
TO YOU WE PLEDGE OUR HONOR AN' FOR YOU OUR BLOOD WE
SHED
IT'S DIS FOR DAT & QUID PRO QUO & FOOD TO KEEP US FED
SO GO AHEAD AN DO IT, PUT DA CROWN UPON YOUR HEAD
GO AHEAD AN DO IT, PUT DA CROWN UPON YOUR HEAD
GO AHEAD AN DO IT, PUT DA CROWN UPON YOUR HEAD.

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(ELEAZAR, JASHEN, URIAH & SOLDIER watch him


with anticipation. An expectant hush)
DAVID:
Deliver this to King Sauls kin with my condolences
and my tears.
ELEAZAR:
What?!
DAVID:
Did you not hear me?
ELEAZAR:
Yes but. But sir - DAVID:
Do it, Colonel. Thats an order.
(DAVID exits)
VOICE OVER INTERCOM:
Attention all hands! Captains departed the bridge!
ELEAZAR:
Give it back?! What in blazes is he thinking about?!
JASHEN:
What have we been fighting for?!
ELEAZAR:
It falls into your hands, you dont give it up. Now is
the time to complete the revolution. Now is the time
to strike! Now is the time to wear the crown!
JASHEN:
All these years, for nothing.
URIAH:
Wait, you two! Youre not giving him enough credit.
ELEAZAR:
Oh?

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URIAH:
Hes playing a deep game. Hes making a show of being
generous and honorable with Sauls kin. Hes taking
the high road. Hes giving the people a glimpse of his
humane and compassionate side. Thus, he improves his
chances of becoming king by popular acclamation.
ELEAZAR:
All right. It may be as you say. But answer me this,
Colonel Uriah. What if the people take it to mean he
doesnt want the crown?
URIAH:
Surely they wouldnt think that. They wouldn't, would
they?
(Fade to black)
VOICE OVER INTERCOM:
Attention all hands! The smoking lamp is out. Silence
will be maintained until sixteen hundred hours. At
seventeen hundred hours, there will be a memorial
service for Saul of the tribe of Benjamin on the main
deck. The uniform will be dress blues. That is all.
(Lights up. DAVIDs star on front of
podium. Enter DAVID in dress uniform)
VOICE OVER INTERCOM:
Compan-EE! Atten-HUT!
(Sound of troops coming to attention. DAVID
goes to podium)
Parade-REST!
(Sound of troops coming to parade rest)
DAVID:
(Sings)
ON A BEACH SOMEWHERE IN PHILISTINE
THE VIRGINS DANCE AND SING
AS THE MEN OF GATH AND ASKELON
THEIR PLUNDER HOME THEY BRING
THERES A GOLD PENDANT FOR EVRY GIRL
A SILVER CUP FOR TEA
AS THE MEN OF GATH AND ASKELON
MARCH HOME IN VICTORY
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DAVID(Cont):
IN THE HILLS SOMEWHERE IN BENJAMIN
THE WIDOWS WEEP AND CRY
FOR THE MEN OF SAUL AND JONATHAN
WITH HEAVY LOSS DID DIE
AND THE DAUGHTERS CHASTE OF ISRAEL
IN CHAINS ARE LED AWAY
AS THE MEN OF SAUL AND JONATHAN
LIE ROTTING IN THE CLAY
HOW FAR THE STRONG HAVE FALLEN
HOW FAR ARE THEY THRUST DOWN
HOW FAR JUST LIKE A COLUMN
THAT SINKS INTO THE GROUND
RECALL THIS SAUL AS FEARLESS
RECALL HIM IN HIS PRIME
RECALL HIS SPIRIT PEERLESS
HIS VALOR FOR ALL TIME
ON THE HEIGHTS ABOVE CAMP JEZREEL
MAY NOTHING LIVING THRIVE
MAY THE FARMS AND FIELDS AND CROPS AND WELLS
REVERT TO DUST AND DIE
FOR A MIGHTY MAN OF BENJAMIN
HAS FALLEN FROM THE SKY
THE MAIDS HAVE LOST THEIR CHAMPION
THEY BEAT THEIR BREASTS AND CRY
HOW FAR THE STRONG HAVE FALLEN
HOW FAR ARE THEY THRUST DOWN
HOW FAR JUST LIKE A COLUMN
THAT SINKS INTO THE GROUND
RECALL THIS SAUL AS FEARLESS
RECALL HIM IN HIS PRIME
RECALL HIS SPIRIT PEERLESS
HIS VALOR FOR ALL TIME.
(Raises sword)
On to Jerusalem! On to Jerusalem! On to Jerusalem!
(Exits, to sound of warriors, KING DAVID!
KING DAVID! KING DAVID! Fade to black)
End of Scene

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Act II Scene 5
(At rise: Enter SATAN in a magnificent
multi-colored robe with large D
sewn across the chest in gold thread)
SATAN:
So they offered him the crown. He said he didn't want
it. But they didn't believe him. They jammed that
crown down tight on his noggin and surrounded him with
enough pomp and circumstance to choke an elephant.
Soon enough, David found out he was no longer free. He
wasn't even a person. He was a commodity, a national
treasure. He belonged to the people. Everywhere he
went, he was trailed by guards, advisors, handlers,
tasters, minstrels, jesters, heralds, you name it.
(Wearing a shimmering, bejeweled gown,
DAVID enters, trailed by GUARD, ADVISOR,
PERSONAL ASSISTANT, FOOD TASTER, MINSTREL &
JESTER. All wear rich robes like SATAN.
SATAN jumps right into line with them)
SATAN:
All in all, being King's not a bad life. You have
these courtiers here to serve you. You want something,
they get it. You don't have to lift a finger.
(DAVID points to an apple hanging from a
tree and rubs his tummy. The GUARD, the
ADVISOR and SATAN all rush to get it.
They fight over it. SATAN prevails and
walks up to DAVID with the apple. DAVID
takes the apple and pushes him away)

DON'T
DON'T
DON'T
LEARN

DAVID:
(Sings)
YOU STAND SO CLOSE TO ME
YOU STARE AT MY FACE
YOU STAND SO CLOSE TO ME
TO KEEP IN YOUR PLACE

STAY A DULL NONENTITY


MINGLE NOT WITH THE PROUD
LIVE IN ANONYMITY
BE A FACE IN THE CROWD

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DAVID(Cont):
IS IT NOT AN IRONY?
OF MY FORTUNE AND FAME
NOW I LIVE IN HISTORY
NOW THEY SWEAR BY MY NAME
MARK THE WAY IT CAME TO BE
LIKE A BOLT FROM THE BLUE
(Takes an arrow, points it at himself)
BUT THE BOLT THAT CAME FOR ME
WON'T BE COMING FOR YOU.
(GUARD turns, tries to touch DAVID)
GUARD:
(Sings)
WANNA TOUCH YOU!
(DAVID pushes him away)
DAVID:
(Sings)
KEEP AWAY FROM!
ADVISOR:
(Sings)
WANNA TOUCH YOU!
DAVID:
(Sings)
KEEP AWAY FROM!
PERSONAL ASSISTANT:
(Sings)
WANNA TOUCH YOU!
DAVID:
(Sings)
KEEP AWAY FROM! ME!
(SATAN, MINSTREL & JESTER surround DAVID)
SATAN & MINSTREL & JESTER:
(Sings)
WANNA BE YOU!

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DAVID:
(Sings)
KEEP AWAY FROM!
SATAN & MINSTREL & JESTER:
(Sings)
WANNA BE YOU!
DAVID:
(Sings)
KEEP AWAY FROM!
SATAN & MINSTREL & JESTER:
(Sings)
WANNA BE YOU!
DAVID:
(Sings)
KEEP AWAY FROM! ME!
(DAVID snaps the arrow in two and throws it
over their heads. They turn and rush to
retrieve it. DAVID runs past them and
exits)

End of Scene

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Act II Scene 6
(At rise: a lovely late afternoon. A
verdant pasture. DAVID stands, keeping
watch over sheep. His crown rests on the
grass at his feet. SHEEP 1, SHEEP 2 & SHEEP
3 recline, chewing cuds)
DAVID:
(To SHEEP)
I dont know. Its hard to explain. But if anyone
understands me, you guys do. Its like everybodys
trying to grab a piece of me. Theres no part of me
that I can call my own anymore. Do you understand
what Im trying to say?
(SHEEP nod. DAVID sings)
THIS IS MY STORY
THIS IS MY SONG
IF SOMEONE ELSE SINGS IT
IT WOULD BE WRONG
THIS IS MY
SIMPLE AND
IF SOMEONE
IT'D BE IN

STORY
PLAIN
ELSE SINGS IT
VAIN

TO SING ABOUT MY INNER SELF


TO SING ABOUT MY SOUL
TO SING ABOUT MY DEEPEST CORE
WHAT WOULD THEY KNOW?
TO SING ABOUT MY DESTINY
TO SING ABOUT MY HOPES
TO SING ABOUT MY WANTS AND DREAMS
WHAT WOULD THEY KNOW?
ITS MY LIFE WERE SPEAKING OF
AND IM THE ONE TO LIVE IT
HOW CAN SOMEONE ELSE STEP UP
AND TELL ME WHAT GOES IN IT?
THIS IS MY STORY
THIS IS MY SONG
IF SOMEONE ELSE SINGS IT
IT WOULD BE WRONG
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(Enter GABRIEL, walking purposefully, in
his white robe. The SHEEP tug at DAVIDs
tunic and indicate the approaching GABRIEL)
GABRIEL:
David. People are wondering where you disappeared to.
DAVID:
Sometimes I need to get away. Away from the crowd.
GABRIEL:
Of course you do. Quietude is soothing for the soul.
Sometimes being a shepherd of sheep is more rewarding
than being a shepherd of men.
DAVID:
Im scared.
GABRIEL:
Of course you are. Theres all sorts of traps and
snares and valleys of death awaiting the unwary. Youd
be very foolish not to be scared.
DAVID:
I wasnt scared of Goliath.
GABRIEL:
Compared to the vipers at a kingly court, your duel
with Goliath was like a stroll in the park. That
country bumpkin had no idea who he was up against. Now
relax. Youll be fine as long as you can walk among
them and not show fear. Just pretend youre the
friendly, neighborhood beekeeper.
DAVID:
Ill try.
GABRIEL:
Do better than try. Now I have a message. Pay
attention. Youre not going to build the temple.
DAVID:
What??!
GABRIEL:
Youre not going to build the temple.
DAVID:
But Ive got equipment and materials in storage!
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GABRIEL:
He knows.
DAVID:
Ive signed contracts with masons and carpenters!
GABRIEL:
He knows.
DAVID:
Im even writing choral pieces for the choir!
(SATAN in black robe enters, stands away
from DAVID & GABRIEL, watching them. He has
one arm in a sling, a big bandage around
his head, and he walks with a crutch)
GABRIEL:
David. Please. Youre not going to do it. Its not
going to be you.
DAVID:
I cant believe this! I cannot believe it! Who, then?
GABRIEL:
Someone with cleaner hands.
(SATAN snaps his finger. Enter BATHSHEBA
with tea service)
BATHSHEBA:
Tea, My Lords?
GABRIEL:
Tea would be perfect. I could use a cup right now.
(BATHSHEBA pours him a cup)
Thank you.
BATHSHEBA:
(To DAVID)
Tea, My Lord?
DAVID:
No!
GABRIEL:
David. Please. Have a cup. Pour him a cup.

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BATHSHEBA:
Yes, My Lord.
(BATHSHEBA pours him a cup, hands it to
him. BATHSHEBA bows and exits. SATAN grins)
GABRIEL:
Lovely. Such a delicious smile.
DAVID:
Her name is Bathsheba. Shes Colonel Uriahs wife.
GABRIEL:
Colonel Uriah is a very lucky man.
DAVID:
Yes. Hes a very lucky man.
(Long silence as they drain their cups)
GABRIEL:
All right, King David. Come on. Lets go. Put the
crown upon your head. Time to get back to the old
grind.
(GABRIEL exits. SATAN exits, limping by
DAVID on his crutches, giving him a mocking
air kiss as he passes. DAVID continues to
stand still, seemingly undecided. Finally,
SHEEP 1 picks up the crown and hands it to
DAVID. DAVID takes it and puts it on his
head. Blackout to instrumental of
Imagine)
The End

Page 102

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