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Caitlin Focht
John Dursema
English 1010

Sex Ed for Kids : Prevent and Stop Sexual Abuse

According to the American Society of the Positive Care of Children 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6
boys will be sexually abused before they turn 18. According to American SPCC, 12.3 % of girls
and 27.8% of boys reported being 10 years of age or younger when they were first sexually
victimized. Sexual abuse is characterized as any interaction between a child and an adult (or
another child) in which the child is used for the sexual stimulation of the perpetrator or an
observer. Sexual abuse can include both touching and non-touching behaviors. Touching
behaviors may involve touching of the vagina, penis, breasts or buttocks, oral-genital contact, or
sexual intercourse. According to Becker, one law enforcement expert he had collaborated with
stated, Show me one child that knows nothing about sex, and Ill show you a highly qualified
victim. If children are being sexually abused before the age of 10, sex education should start
long before then. Teaching children the proper terms for genitals, the difference between safe and
unsafe touch, and proper relationships between families.
Children are capable of learning at very rapid paces even before school begins. They are
learning what is okay and not okay with their bodies and even what sex is. The most common
sex education typically takes place when between the 4th and 5th grade. According to Maureen,
Sex education must occur in stages, meeting adolescence at their level of maturity and insight at
each development sage, as well as factoring in common environmental exposure that are

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inevitable at each stage. At all levels of maturity children need to be taught some form of sexual
education.
When talking to small children about sex it is important to be honest with them but at the
same time it is important not to tell them more than what they are ready for. Giving too much
information can really overwhelm a child. They will naturally ask questions like Where do
babies come from? When children ask questions like these the parent shouldnt laugh. Instead
parents should calmly explain in a way that they will understand. If a parent doesnt feel like
they can answer the question appropriately in that moment they should stop and come back to the
subject when they feel like they can correctly explain. Parents should never avoid the subject just
because it make them feel weird.
Teaching kids about sex education begins at the toddler age with teaching them proper
names for body parts such as breast, vulva, vagina, penis and buttocks. When genitals are given
names such as Pee Pee, Coochi, and Cookie, it gives children the idea that talking about
body parts is a game and may even imply that calling them by their real name is shameful.
Knowing proper body part names can help a child communicate when something bad has
happened to them. If a child approaches an adult and says Help me, someone touched my
cookie! it can cause a lot more harm than good if the adult is not aware of the childs nickname
for their genitals. A child being able to properly communicate what has happened will help get
them the help they need in the moment they need it.
Parents may shudder at the thought of their child shouting the word penis in public or
even being curious enough to ask complete strangers whether they have a vagina or a penis.
Children are naturally very curious about their bodies and the bodies of others. The Author of
"No trespassing: This is my body", Patti Fitzgerald, stated in her interview with CBS that when

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children use anatomically correct terms for their genitals it shows those around them that there is
open communication between parent and child about their body which in turn can scare any
potential predators away.
Children can learn things at a very high rate at very young ages. They learn from
experiences, what they have been told, and what they see. Kids are still learning even though no
one is intentionally trying to teach them. More often than not, they are still learning what is okay
and not okay when it comes to their bodies. Kids see that it is fun when mom and dad tickle
them. They may see that hugs from grandma and grandpa are comforting. Their favorite past
time may be when uncle brushes their hair and then rubs them through their clothes.
Young children do not always understand the difference between touch that is
appropriate and touch that is inappropriate. The lack of understanding can cause them to have a
very bad interpretation of what is acceptable to happen with their bodies where there are adults,
people they trust, and even fellow children in their lives.
Teaching children the difference between safe and unsafe touch and even how one is to
present themselves to a child is very important. It is very important to teach these boundaries to
set the standard for how their bodies will be treated and how they will treat the bodies of others.
Children know when touch feels good or hurts them but often they do not know the difference
between appropriate and inappropriate touch. Being sexually abused as a child, especially where
that abuse is not discovered, can lead to confused ideas about appropriate relationships and
behavior (Goodyear-Brown 2012).
There is a terrible misunderstanding when it comes to referring to touch as either good or
bad. When touch is referred to as good or bad it implies that touch either feels good or it feels
bad. The word bad fails to communicate what inappropriate touch actually is. Sexual abuse is

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not always painful. It is any inappropriate touching such as grooming, touching genitals, or even
having the child touch the abusers genitals. If there is not a proper understanding or
communication then it can prove to be very fatal to the child.
Kids come into contact with adults on a daily basis. It can be a family member, a family
friend, or even a complete stranger. It has been stressed to kids not to talk to strangers but, in
fact, strangers may not be the problem. With any relationship children need to be educated on
proper relationships that they are supposed to have with these adults or even older kids. It is very
important to be taught what a safe adult looks like and even teaching them that it is okay for
them to say no to anyone they dont feel comfortable being around is.
Safe adults do NOT ask children for help. If an adult approaches a child and asks for help
finding a lost puppy in exchange for candy that person is not a safe adult. In any case a child
should be taught to first ask their parent before going off with anyone.
As children grow older and take hold of their independence it is essential to teach them
sexual education that is appropriate for their age. Sexual education can give children the
knowledge to fend off predators. Children who are educated on proper anatomical names for
their genitals can clearly communicate when something bad has happened to them. Possessing
this knowledge shows that there is openness in the home and can ward of predators. While
learning the correct names of their body parts children are educated on how to take properly take
care and protect these body parts by setting boundaries. By having clear boundaries, children are
less likely to be fooled into doing things that are inappropriate. Children having a proper
understanding of what a safe adult looks like is less likely to be tricked and taken advantage of
by adults whether they are strangers or acquaintances.

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Works Cited
Maureen, Kenny, e. Sex Education: Attitude of Adolescents, Culture Differences and School
Challenges. Hauppaug, New York: Nova Schience Publisher, Inc., 2014. ebook. web. 13
Apr 2016
Goodyear-Brown, P. (ed.) Handbook of child sexual abuse: identification, assessment and
treatment. Hoboken, New Jersey: Wiley, 2012. Print.
Safely Ever After Inc. "Talking To Children About Physical Or Sexual Abuse CBS Los
Angeles.mp4". Online news clip. YouTube. YouTube, 06 Feb. 2012. Web. 11 Apr. 2012.
Becker, Gavin. Protecting the Gift: Keeping Children and Teenagers Safe (and Parents Sane).
New York: Dell Publishing, 1999. Print.
"Child Sexual Abuse." American SPCC. American SPCC, n.d. Web. 15 Apr. 2016.