101 Ways to Kill People

By Phoebe and Benna

1) Suffocation
2) Hanging
3) Paper Cuts Everywhere
4) Shoot them in the head
5) Cut Limbs off slowly
6) Do the Volcano experiment inside them
7) Rusty spoons through liver
8) Paper cut them, then make then take a dip in vinegar
9) Give them one paper cut, then throw them in a pool full of hungry piranhas
10) Make them walk into a building full of Jews and yell ‘Hail Hitler!’
11) Cut their head off (hardly any cleaning up later)
12) Mummify them, alive
13) Deprive them of sleep
14) Cover them in meat sauce and throw them in a cage with an starved tiger
15) Gouge their eyes out with spoons
16) Stick a metal pole through their head
17) Make them walk on burning hot coal
18) Bury them alive
19) Death by cheese grater
20) Throw them in front of a bus (or a really heavy moving object)
21) Make them drink fly spray
22) Make them drink, drink concentrate
23) Make them drink wet cement
24) Make them climb an electrocuted barbed wire fence
25) Wrap them in barbed wire and throw them around
26) Operate on them. Cut out their stomach (careful not to kill them) and make
them eat lots of food
27) Do the whole Sweeny Todd thing, and turn them into meat pies
28) Make them think their in a horror movie and kill them in the end
29) Plant bamboo shoots in their stomachs
30) Feed them tons of ice cream (death by brain freeze)
31) Flash freeze them
32) Fiddle with their iPod when they’re not looking, making the volume really
really loud
33) Give them an umbrella and tell them to be Mary Poppins on top of a ten storey
building
34) Get them to pose for a photo and drop a pillar on them
35) Genetically modify a Venus fly trap so it grows really big and put them in a
room with it
36) Make them walk into a bee farm without a suit
37) Force feed them McDonalds
38) Tie ropes to their arms and legs, tie the other ends to two jet planes, and fly the
jet planes in opposite directions.
39) Death by faulty acupuncture
40) Turn back time and give them a ticket to Titanic
41) Paint their whole body so the paint seals and they can’t breathe
42) Give them an eyeball piercing
43) Human Guinea Pig
44) Take them to an animal testing lab, open all the cages and leave victim alone
with them
45) Wrap them in lots of cello tape
46) Make them spend a day with Michael Jackson
47) Drop them into an electrocuted pool
48) Operate on them. Remove all the bones from their body and see how long they
survive
49) Make them drink Nitro-glycerine and watch them light up like a Jack Lantern
50) Impale them on lots of keys
51) Tape their mouths and give them a cold =]
52) Get some claustrophobic people and make them go on an elevator that’s gets
stuck halfway through
53) Pluck every strand of hair from their body one by one with a pair of tweezers
54) Strap them on a wood mill and watch them get cut in half
55) Put them in a maze with lots of mirrored walls and a roof and no way out
56) Re-enact the gladiator and make them face a tiger
57) Tie the ends of their hair to a fan and turn it on high
58) Tell them they’re Jesus and they can walk on water
59) Strap them on train tracks and wait till train comes (give them hope of
survival)
60) Put them in a room with really hungry cannibals
61) Bribe a ghost to haunt them
62) Put them in a tank with a roof and slowly filling water
63) Put them in a jungle with lots of poisonous snakes
64) Make them eat sewing needles
65) Make them find the hay in the needle stack in an hour
66) Skin them alive and stick them in citric acid
67) Make them breathe in pure oxygen
68) Make them go scuba diving and pull them up really quickly, giving them air
bubbles in their bloodstream
69) Kidnap a rich kid, cut his ears off, video tape it, show it to his parents and
when they give you money, kill him anyway
70) Put them in a room full gun powder and drop a match in it
71) Make them bite their own tongue off and swallow it
72) Put them in a room full of scared skunks, so the stench overpowers the oxygen
and they choke and die
73) Get someone with a really big penis and get him to have angry sex with victim
(anal sex if victim is a male)
74) Get a lighter and burn holes in them slowly
75) Paper cut their eyeballs
76) Push them off a really tall building aiming for a powerpole
77) Strap them down and get a blind man to go crazy with a nail gun
78) Chops off their balls and leave them to bleed
79) Deep throat them until they choke
80) Cover them in batter and deep fry them in burning oil
81) Push them off the edge of a waterfall with spiky rocks at the bottom
82) Get an obese person to sit on them
83) Get a supermodel with really pointy stilettos to walk all over them
84) Put them in the middle of a really sensitive minefield
85) Starve them
86) Impale them with a spear
87) Make them choke on a ball point pen
88) Death by heater
89) Trap them in a sun bed
90) Choke them on fake Christmas decorations
91) Electrocute the toilet
92) Drown them in a septic tank
93) Sandpaper them to death
94) Death by bondage
95) Force them in a small box and hammer nails into it
96) Make them lie in the middle of a road. Get a hue steamroller and run them
over starting at their feet
97) Nail them to a crucifix, upside down
98) Build them into a building and leave them there
99) Stick crayons in every hole till you hit the right spot
100)Put them in a box with some room, sticks nails in on every surface from the
outside and throw the box down a really steep hill.
101)Force-feed them lots of sleeping pills. Make it look like suicide