Lesson 5 Essay , Learning Gender Susan M.

Shaw and Janet Lee explain from an early age we start learning about our gender and what it means to be masculine or feminine. The discussion of gender does not imply that all men can be described as masculine and all women can be described as feminine. Men can feel comfortable with their femininity and women can feel comfortable in their masculinity. Chaz Bono writes, As far back as I can remember, my mother always seemed to want me to act more like a girl. James, S. (2012) Chaz Bonos mother had a hard time accepting her daughters masculinity, like most parents of transgender children. It is apparent that Chaz Bono, born Chasity Bono, knew early on that he was not a tomboy, who liked boxing, but he was a transgender. Bonos publicist, Howard Bragman writes, He feels comfortable with his own masculinity. Gender is between your ears and not between your legs." James,S. (2012) Retrieved from: http://abcnews.go.com/Health/transgender-chazbono-seeks-penis-genital-surgery-risky/story?id=15299871 In an article by The New York Times, "Supporting Boys and Girls When The Line Isn't Clear", we learn that, "Children as young as 5 who display predispositions to dress like the opposite sex are being supported by a growing number of young parents, educators and mental health professionals. Doctors, some of them from the top pediatric hospitals, have begun to advise families to let these children be who they are to foster a sense of security and self-esteem. They are motivated, in part, by the high incidence of depression, suicidal feelings and self-mutilation that has been common in past generations of transgender children. Legal trends suggest that schools are now required to respect parents decisions." Brown, PL (2006) Retrieved from: http://www.nytimes.com/2006/12/02/us/02child.html? As Susan M. Shaw and Janet Lee writes," Why is it so easy to say you were a tomboy and so difficult to admit to being a sissy?" (pp.105) Females proudly will tell you that they were able to keep up with the boys on the soccer field, sometimes even running circles around them but boys have a hard time admitting they didnt want to spend their afternoons chasing some stupid ball. (Calvin and Hobbes 1990, pp. 113) Susan M. Shaw and Janet Lee write, This has a lot to do with the meaning associated with masculinity and femininity and the ways these are ranked in society. A female emulating masculine traits and being a tomboy may feel suddenly on the mans level, equality with them, as the male emulating feminine traits may feel weaker and be called a wimp or a sissy. In the movie, A League of Their Own, the first all-female baseball team is formed. The women are expected to reject their femininity, no sissy stuff and to give the other team hell. At one point in the movie, Tom Hanks character yells at one of the women, Theres no crying in baseball! Susan M. Shaw and Janet Lee point out adjectives that are associated with traditional notions of femininity, some of which include, passive, dependent, sensitive, needy and emotional. (pp. 117) In an episode of Sex and the City, Samantha Jones is turned down for a job she is well qualified for by a sexist male and says, Emotional is just code for, I dont want to hire a woman. (SATC, Episode 4) The traits appointed as feminine are less valued than those traits considered masculine. This is gender ranking which sets the stage for sexism. Judith Lorber writes, When genders are ranked , the devalued

genders have less power, prestige, and economic rewards than the valued genders. (Shaw, Lee. pp.119) The social category woman is hardly the same as man. When we learn the sex of our baby we learn whether it is a boy or a girl determined by our biological differences, our X and Y chromosomes (XX for female and XY for male). Women are the sign of Venus and Men are the sign of Mars. Learning their gender is more complicated and is not an overnight process. Different peoples cultures play a role in gender issues. A female can be comfortable with their masculinity and a male can be comfortable with their femininity or they can question these internal feelings. As a society we can educate that its ok for a boy to choose ballet over baseball or barbies over transformers and that this decision will not make them any weaker or less of a male. To educate young girls that its ok to prefer fishing and catching frogs in a muddy swamp over a day of shopping, or sign up for soccer instead of cheerleading and she shouldnt question if there is something wrong with her based on these decisions. In a few years they may see a change in their masculinity or femininity, or they may not have any changes to their gender behaviors and he will grow up to be a choreographer and she may be a biologist. However, when a child doesnt know what line to be in or what bathroom to use (the girls or the boys) we need to discuss these internal feelings and help them get to a place where they feel comfortable in their own skin. There is no core or bedrock in human nature below these endlessly looping processes of the social production of sex and gender , self and other , identity and psyche, each of which is a complex cultural construction. (J. Butler 1990, 36).