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Apri l 23, 2009

Volume 6, Issue 29 [ ]
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From top: Photo by Ryan Waggoner,
photo by Matt Bristow
2
April 23, 2009
table of contents
Cover photo illustration by Tyler Waugh
7 THIS WEEKEND: dog walking for a cause
8 THATS DISGUSTING: tongue-tied kissing
12 GREEN IT!: junk mail overload
12 DIY: dodging campus hander-outers
15 WESCOE WIT: well, communists can be
attractive people too
16 BITCH & MOAN: roommate drama
1
9
SPEAK: a
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April 23, 2009
Editor Matt Hirschfeld
Associate editor Jessica Sain-Baird
Designers Erica Birkman, Lauren
Cunningham
Contact Elliot Kort, Stephanie Schneider
Health Sachiko Miyakawa, Megan Weltner
Manual Becka Cremer, Katherine Mulder,
Adam Schoof
Notice Madeline Hyden, Ross Stewart
Play Kelly Breckunitch, Kristopher
McDonald
Contributors Drew Anderson, Mark
Arehart, Alicia Banister, Taylor Brown,
Chance Dibben, Mia Iverson, Carly
Halvorson, Daniel Nordstrom, Meghan
Nuckolls, Tom Powers, Abigail Olcese,
Brieun Scott, Kelci Shipley, Amanda Sorell
Creative consultant Carol Holstead
Contact us jayplay09@gmail.com
Jayplay
The University Daily Kansan
111 Stauffer-Flint Hall
1435 Jayhawk Blvd.
Lawrence, KS 66045
785.864.4810
We rack our balls for You
601 Kasold
(785) 749-7699
Open 9 am to 2 am Daily
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(785) 749-7699
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1801 mass st. (785) 832-8800
thursday, april 23 friday, april 24 saturday, april 25 monday, april 27 sunday, april 26
jayplayers editors note
calendar
I thought living by
myself would have
been a dream. No
messes of others to
deal with. No awkward
morning encounters
with strangers my roommates had stay the night.
And no impromptu midnight parties that would
distract me from my sleep.
But after about a month of solitude, I became
lonely. Rather than admitting that I was lonely, I
got a dog.
Buster, as he was named by his former owner,
was a beagle and was a lot messier than any
roommate Ive ever had. Anything stuffed was
promptly shredded and any clean part of the
carpet was swiftly tainted with pee or poop.
But no matter how many pillows were
destroyed or stains were made, I couldnt get
mad at his puppy dog eyes or good intention-
flled personality.
Check out Kristophers personal essay on
page 19 for his story about how he met and fell
in love with his lil buddy.
Eventually, I had to give Buster away because
I was moving to an apartment that already had
two dogs. Hope he doesnt miss me too much,
because I really miss him.
Matt Hirschfeld, editor

wednesday, april 29
tuesday, april 28
Paul Newman Film
Series
Lawrence Public Library, 7
p.m., free, all ages
940 Dance Company
presents New
Works in Mexico and
in Lawrence
Lawrence Arts Center,
7:30 p.m., $7.50 to $13.50,
all ages
That 1 Guy/Blue
Turtle Seduction
The Bottleneck, 8 p.m.,
$11, all ages
Moonlight & Magnolias
Lawrence Community
Theatre, 8 p.m., $14 to
$20, all ages
Bill Witheringon/
Rome Balestrieri/
Johnny Kenney
The Barrel House, 8 p.m.,
$2 to $3, 21+
Drakkar Sauna
The Eighth Street Tap
Room, 10 p.m., $3, 21+
Lollipop Factory/
The Noise FM/The
Factory Workers
Replay Lounge, 10 p.m.,
$2, 21+
Night Marchers: A
Tribute to Medeski,
Martin and Wood
Jazzhaus, 10 p.m., $5, 21+
Tree of Life with
Turtle Island String
Quartet
Lied Center, 7:30 p.m., $12
students, all ages
Moonlight & Magnolias
Lawrence Community
Theatre, 8 p.m., $14 to $20,
all ages
Bill Witheringon/Rome
Balestrieri/Johnny
Kenney
The Barrel House, 8 p.m., $2
to $3, 21+
Coolzey/Bru Lei/Left
E. Grove
Jackpot Music Hall, 10 p.m.,
$5 to $7, 18+
Miles Bonny/Johnny
Quest/Stik Figa/Greg
Enemy/Spence
The Bottleneck, 10 p.m., $5
to $7, 18+
The Life and Times
Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., $3,
21+
The Breakdown with
BSears/Stackswell/DJ
Sabo
The Eighth Street Tap Room,
10 p.m., $3, 21+
Cosmopolitics
Jazzhaus, 10 p.m., $4, 21+
Nick Jaina
Replay Lounge, 6 p.m. $3,
all ages
Poker Pub
The Pool Room, 7 p.m.
and 10 p.m., free, 21+
Refection Eternal
Granada, 7 p.m., $25,
all ages
Smackdown! Trivia
and Karaoke
The Bottleneck, 8:30
p.m., prices vary, 18+
The Gloves
Replay Lounge, 10 p.m.,
$2, 21+
Junius/Actors &
Actresses/Wrath &
Ruin
Jackpot Music Hall, 10
p.m., $5 to $7, 18+
New Riders of the
Purple Sage
Granada, 7 p.m., $20, all ages
Kate Voegele/Angel
Taylor/Matt Hires
The Bottleneck, 7 p.m., $15,
all ages
Original Music Mondays
The Bottleneck, 9 p.m., free,
18+
Dollar Bowling
Royal Crest Bowling Lanes, 9
p.m., $1, all ages
Riverboat Gamblers/
KTP/Fists Up!
Jackpot Music Hall, 10 p.m.,
$12 to $14, 18+
KU Symphony
Orchestra
Lied Center, 7:30 p.m., $5
students, all ages
Tuesday Nite Swing
Kansas Union, 8 p.m., free,
all ages
Rocco DeLuca & The
Burden/Joshua James
The Bottleneck, 8 p.m., $14.50
to $16, all ages
Jon Ginoli of Pansy
Division with Charles
McVey
Jackpot Music Hall, 9 p.m., $6,
all ages
Poker Pub
The Pool Room, 7 p.m. and 10
p.m., free, 21+
The Americana Music
Academy Jam
Signs of Life, 7:30 p.m., free,
all ages
Reverend Horton Heat
The Bottleneck, 9 p.m., $17 to
$19, all ages
Wayne The Train
Hancock
Jackpot Music Hall, 9 p.m.,
$12, all ages
That Acoustic Jam
Thing
Jazzhaus, 10 p.m., $2, 21+
The Bismark/Novalus
Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., $2,
21+
venues
Jazzhaus
926 1/2 Massachusetts Street
785.749.1387
Jackpot Music Hall
943 Massachusetts Street
785.843.2846
The Eighth Street Tap
Room
801 New Hampshire Street
785.841.6918
Replay Lounge
946 Massachusetts Street
785.749.7676
Lied Center
1600 Stewart Drive
785.864.3469
The Bottleneck
737 New Hampshire Street
785.841.5483
The Kills/The Horrors/
Magic Wand
The Bottleneck, 7 p.m., $19 to
$21, all ages
Moonlight & Magnolias
Lawrence Community Theatre,
7:30 p.m., $14 to $20, all ages
Bill Witheringon/Rome
Balestrieri/John Kenney
The Barrel House, 8 p.m., $2
to $3, 21+
The Drunken Sailors
Tailor-A Beneft Fashion
Show
Abe & Jakes Landing, 8:30 p.m.,
$5, 18+
The Von Ehrics/
Unknown Stuntman
Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., $2,
21+
The Old Black/Nanda
Devi/Stull
Jackpot Music Hall, 10 p.m., $5
to $7, 18+
Marshall Brown and the
Baggs/The Bus Co.
Jazzhaus, 10 p.m., $3, 21+
Shiver Shiver/Tim
Wildsmith/Lloyd Likes
Mike
The Eighth Street Tap Room,
10 p.m., $3, 21+
play
5
April 23, 2009
Public speaking is Americans No. 1
fear. Singing in public, though, is a whole
different story. Maybe having the words right
in front of them provides a safety net for
wannabe singers. Fact is, talented vocalists or
drunken fools do it with the same amount of
enthusiasm, so you shouldnt be embarrassed
to give it a try. In some ways, its a very
liberating experience.
Bars are known to have karaoke, but
restaurants such as Encore Caf offer karaoke
options as well. Denny Wong, manager of
Encore Caf, 1007 Massachusetts Street, says
the karaoke experience at Encore is different
from others around town.
Encore has fve private rooms with
karaoke set-ups. Some rooms can hold 12
people, and others can hold up to 20. In China,
karaoke is a private experience in an enclosed
environment with friends, Wong says.
Americanized karaoke, though, is
exhibitionist in nature. Participants get on
stage and perform to a crowd of people, many
of whom they do not know. Karaoke works
like this on Saturday nights at Set Em Up
Jacks, 1800 East 23rd Street. Karaoke takes
place in the main room of the restaurant.
Neither restaurant is lacking for
participants, either. Its gotten so popular
that sometimes people dont get to sing more
than once, says Set Em Up Jacks owner
Danny Koehn.
Wong says Fridays and Saturdays are the
busiest nights for Encores karaoke rooms.
Both restaurants also have a group of regulars
who come in. Mostly they come here for
karaoke, not for eating, Wong says. At Set
Em Up Jacks, the regulars are a little crazier.
Some people have their own choreographed
routines, Koehn says.
In the Limelight
Grab the mic and lose your inhibitions
onstage by performing karaoke around
town. There are a lot of different
options, so dont be shy
You dont have to go out, though, to have a
good time doing karaoke. You can always rent
a machine. Shinichi Takenouchi owns Karaoke
Entertainment, a rental company in Kansas
City, Missouri. Takenouchi says the best part
about karaoke is that its fun for any occasion.
Some people may be more willing to burst
into song in a private setting. Takenouchi says
the machines are easy to use as well. Its
like a jukebox. You just punch this number and
that number, Takenouchi says.
Logan Walker, Holcomb senior, tries to go
out to a karaoke night every other week and
says people shouldnt be discouraged from
trying it. You dont have to be a good singer
to be good at karaoke, Walker says. Besides,
karaoke opens up the opportunity for some
wild times. Walker recalls one specifc night
doing karaoke with some friends.
All the girls decided to sign up all of
the guys for singing without telling us. They
called all of our names to go up there at the
same time and it ended up being an *NSYNC
song. They (the girls) started screaming and
being like crazy fans, and it was a good time,
Walker says.
Koehn sees this behavior often from the
singers at Set Em Up Jacks and understands
why they can cut loose. It lets them pretend
like theyre a rock star, Koehn says.
Karaoke can provide people with the
opportunity to get wild and put their nerves
behind them. Koehn has seen some mediocre
performers on stage, so you shouldnt be
afraid to do your thing.
Takenouchi passes on some words of
wisdom for anyone who still has doubts as
well. Take a drink and what the heck, he
says. A drop of liquid courage may be just
what you need to party like a rock star. JP
So you think you cant sing ...
I sat in my car minutes before performing at Set Em Up Jacks karaoke night. I was listening
to my song choice making sure I wouldnt screw up the lyrics, because, lets face it, there are
a lot of confusing lyrics in some of the most popular songs (thank you Kurt Cobain!). Here
are some of the more confusing lyrics from 80s, 90s and today.
Smells Like Teen Spirit Nirvana
Misheard lyric: Here we are now, in
containers
Actual lyric: Here we are now, entertain us
Livin on a Prayer Bon Jovi
Misheard lyric: It doesnt make a difference
if were naked or not
Actual lyric: It doesnt make a difference if
we make it or not
Bohemian Rhapsody Queen
Misheard lyric: The algebra has a devil for a
sidekick eeeeee
Actual lyric: Beelzebub has a devil put aside
for me
Hey Ya Outkast
Misheard lyric: Shake it like a polar bear
ninja
Actual lyric: Shake it like a Polaroid picture
Hollaback Girl Gwen Stefani
Misheard lyric: I aint no Harlem black girl
Actual lyric: I aint no hollaback girl
Dude (Looks Like a Lady)
Aerosmith
Misheard lyric: Do me like a lady
Actual lyric: Dude looks like a lady
Source: www.kissthisguy.com
Photos by Tyler Waugh
Emily Franzenburg, Keystone, Iowa, graduate student, says she loves to perform karaoke.People just get up and have a good
time, she says. Go to Kansan.com/jayplay to view an audio slideshow of Set Em Up Jacks karaoke night.
By Kelly Breckunitch
kbreckunitch@kansan.com
6
April 23, 2009
play
Inside, the lights are turned down, the music
is fowing, and everyone in the bar is dancing
the night away. Brian Sears, or rather DJ BSears,
is controlling the pace of the evening with each
song selection he makes from his obscure
collection of vinyl treasures.
Sears, Lawrence junior, along with
Washington, D.C., native and Lawrence
resident Matt Stackswell Brenner, hosts The
Breakdown, a monthly event with a club-like
atmosphere, at The Eighth Street Tap Room,
801 New Hampshire Street. This Saturday,
The Breakdown will feature special guest, DJ
Sabothe world-renowned artist is based in
New York.
The event does come with a warning, Sears
says.
If you want to break up the monotony of
the usual bar scene, come check us out, Sears
says. Just please dont expect us to play any
songs youve ever heard.
Working hard to forge their way in a
Oldies with a twist
Two Lawrence DJs pave their way
with some goodies from the past
The Breakdown, hosted by Brian
Sears and Matt Stackswell Brenner,
welcomes special guest DJ Sabo at 10
p.m. on Saturday. Based out of New York
but originally from Philadelphia, Sabo, 33,
lets his passion for music drive his life
and hopes to spread his sound along the
way.
If I can get a room full of 10 people
moving or 1,000, its a good night, Sabo
says. The whole point is to take people
on a journey until the lights come on.
When he isnt busy in New York, Sabo
is DJing around the world. Recent trips
have included Atlanta, Los Angeles and
San Francisco, but he has also played in
various countries such as the Dominican
Republic, Brazil, Mexico, France and
Austria.
One of his most memorable gigs came
after President Obamas inauguration
when he DJed for the Huffngton Post
party, which included singers such as
Sheryl Crow, Will. I. Am., and Sting.
This will be Sabos second visit to
Lawrence and he says he cant wait to
play in front of an open audience again.
The last time I was here was great.
The party went off, Sabo says. People
in New York arent always as open-
minded to my sound, but in Lawrence,
its something they havent heard and the
people really seemed to love it.
By Kristopher McDonald
kmcdonald@kansan.com
Contributed photos
Spin those records: Brian Sears, left, and Matt Stackswell Brenner, right, host The
Breakdown, a monthly event at The Eighth Street Tap Room. Their next show is this Saturday
with guest DJ Sabo.
mostly indie rock town, Sears and Stackswell
are trying to bring a new sound to Lawrence
with a little bit of fair. The odds of hearing a
Billboard Hot 100 song are slim, but this pair
of DJs hopes to musically educate its audience
with its rare mix of 45s and LPsonce thought
to be a thing of the past.
In the world of DJs, a 45 is the most
common form of the vinyl singlethe name is
derived from its play speed, 45 rpm. An LP, or
long-playing phonograph record, is designed to
be played at 33 1/3 rpm.
In Sears collection, an eclectic assortment
of jazz, funk and disco from the 70s and 80s
can now be found, but it took time to establish
a credible base of music to launch his career.
When Sears found his passion for DJing, he set
out to enhance his selection of music. Sears
used every extra penny he had buying and
trading vinyl records through online forums
and personal connections.
To some people it sounds crazy, especially
my parents, to spend money on old 45s, but
to me its an investment into what I love,
Sears says. Its my passion and I just want
to share it.
The kinds of records these DJs buy and
trade can cost from $75 to $400, but Stackswell
says these vintage jewels can sell for even
more. Recently, Stackswell sold a Messenger,
Inc., record on eBay for more than $1,000. This
isnt always the norm, it just depends on how
much a buyer really covets a specifc record,
Sears says.
One day a record will be worth $50 and
the next day it could be worth $300, Sears
says.
During one particular exchange of records
last year, Sears met Stackswell through an
acquaintance and the two immediately hit
it off. Sears, who was the sole host of The
Breakdown, asked Stackswell to join him in his
show. Stackswell, living in Washington, D.C., at
the time, few in once per month to co-host the
event until he fnally made the decision to move
to Lawrence permanently early in the fall.
I really enjoyed Lawrence and loved the
culture here so it just made sense to me,
Stackswell says. I fgured it just made sense
for me at this time in my life.
The two DJs work well together but
each brings his own style to the show. Sears
is more laid-back, letting the music speak for
itself. Stackswell incorporates his collection
of Motown, northern Detroit soul
and blue note jazz with his
personable, crowd-inclusive
style.
I like to get on the mic and
make shout-outs, Stackswell says.
I want to make everyone feel
appreciated and included.
Whether two people are on
the dance foor or 500 are, Sears
and Stackswell arent satisfed unless
everyone is happy. For them, a good
night happens when everyone is on
the dance foor, losing track of time.
Brian Majors, KU alum and Lawrence
resident, has been to The Breakdown
before and says he will be there again.
Its a party. People who have never been
to a dance night at the Tap Room should
try it out, Majors says. They pack the place
and Ive never not had a good time.
Sears and Stackswell are aware that not
everyone will be open to their brand of
music, but all they ask for is a chance to show
how much fun the music of our past can be.
We take music that people have probably
never heard and turn it into something people
enjoy and swear they have heard before, Sears
says. A lot of times people are surprised by
how much they really like the music we play.
If youre at the show, feel free to ask Sears
or Stackswell what they are playing or anything
about their passion, just dont ask for Justin
Timberlake or 50 Cent, Sears says.
I love sharing my passion with people but
it gets frustrating when all they want is the Top
40, Sears says.
After all, if the Billboard Hot 100 is what
you wantjust turn on the radio and have a
dance party at home. JP
DJ Sabo in the spotlight
7
April 23, 2009
play
This Weekend: Dog Jog 2009
The sun is shining, fowers are blooming, and
the air is fnally getting warmer. Spring is upon
us, and so too is spring fever. People arent the
only ones getting a little friskier this time of
yeardogs are too.
Instead of simply taking your dog on an
extended walk this weekend, treat him or her
to something special: the 2009 Dog Jog at 1:30
p.m. on Sunday. Its a 5K dog run or walk to
beneft the Lawrence Humane Society. The race
starts and ends at the Burge Union.
Runners and walkers are encouraged to
leash their dogs and bring them along for the fun,
race organizer Jessica King says. King, Chanute
alumna, has been working closely with junior
Jessica Pierce, of Lawrence, junior Chelsea
Mertz, of Topeka, and Concerned, Active and
Aware Students to put on this event.
Registration is $15 and includes a T-shirt, and
100 percent of the fee goes to the Lawrence
Humane Society.
With the current recession, its easy to
forget about organizations such as the Humane
Society, Pierce says.
Everyone loves animals, right? Pierce says,
So why not come out and have some fun with
your dog? Its one of the cheaper runs out there
and all of the money goes to a great cause.
The race organizers will also be accepting
donations of blankets and towels for the
Humane Society on the day of the race.
For more information on the 2009 Dog Jog,
check out www.geocities.com/dogjog2009/.
Kristopher McDonald
Contributed photo
Woof woof: Beneft the Lawrence Humane Society by
taking your dog on a 5K run or walk this Sunday.
$29.52 $17.73
WEEKLY SPECIALS
[ ]
every THURSDAY
on the back of
why pay more when you could pay less
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Classic
Lawrence
Parents in town for the weekend? Show them the
true historic sites in Lawrence. Enjoy dinner and
drinks at the memorable Eldridge Restaurant and
Te Jayhawker.
Treat your parents while they treat you!
8 April 23, 2009
health
nurture by nature
Ginger
Photo by Sachiko Miyakawa
Ginger spice: Use ginger as an anti-nausea remedy for
those long car rides.
Thats DISGUSTING
Photo by Ryan McGeeney
Tongue tied: As passionate and intimate as French
kissing can feel, all that saliva swapping can spread
diseases such as herpes and mononucleosis.
French kissing
Many of you probably found the tongue
tango disgusting when you were younger.
Now, French kissing can be a way to show
affection with or attraction toward a signifcant
other. French kissing can also transmit some
diseases.
Saliva can carry various infectious diseases
that cause colds and skin diseases. Herpes
and mononucleosis, also known as the
kissing disease, are among the most common
infectious diseases that can be passed through
a French kiss, says Richard Siegel, certifed
sexual educator.
It wont help to clean your mouth after a
saliva-swapping kiss. Once you kiss, Siegel says,
brushing your teeth or rinsing your mouth
will not be effective in preventing herpes and
mononucleosis.
Sachiko Miyakawa
If motion sickness creeps up every time you
ride in a car or plane, try some ginger. Ginger
is helpful for nausea, says Kathi Kemper, a
pediatrics professor at Wake Forest University
Baptist Medical Center.
How ginger works as an anti-nausea
remedy is unclear, but Kemper, author of The
Holistic Pediatrician, found ginger has been well
documented as a remedy for nausea. It has
been used as a medicine in various parts of the
world, including China and India.
Kemper says ginger is best used as the spice
or in tea made from fresh root. To prevent
motion sickness, eat or drink ginger about half
an hour before traveling. You can also get a dose
of ginger in candy form at Wheatfelds Bakery,
904 Vermont Street, or drink ginger ale.
Ginger tea recipe
Peel 2-inch piece of fresh ginger root and
cut it into thin slices. Boil 4 cups of water in
a saucepan and add the ginger. Cover it and
reduce to a simmer for 15 to 20 minutes. Strain
the tea and add honey and lemon to taste.
Source: About.com
Sachiko Miyakawa
FRIDAY
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9
April 23, 2009
health
When Jessica Puljan went home the
summer after senior year to see her long-
distance boyfriend of two years, the last thing
on her mind was sex. Although the two had
not seen each other for months, that year
Puljan, Wheaton, Illinois, senior, gained 15
pounds while at KU. During their two years
of dating, Puljan had never had trouble getting
turned on, but this summer was different.
He wasnt there when I stuffed my face
that year. I looked terrible compared to the
last time I saw him and the last thing I wanted
to do was get on top of him, Puljan says.
According to a 2006 USA Today poll, 25
percent of men and 40 percent of women
reported having little or no sex drive. But
what if the ingredients to a greater sex life are
at your nearest grocery store?
Consuming certain foods can help to not
only improve your overall health but also to
get that mojo going again. A couple of months
after Puljan decided to change her eating
habits, she noticed her sex drive skyrocket. I
think greasy food taints the sex drive. I would
feel bloated and terrible and it would drag
me down, Puljan says. When I started eating
healthy I actually believed my boyfriend when
he told me I was sexy.
From a psychological stand point, being
healthy is the most important thing. People
who do not take care of their bodies tend to
have a lower sex drive, says Susan Carlson,
professor of dietetics and nutrition. If you
are taking care of your body, you are feeling
good about yourself, making you more open
to having sexual experiences.
However, self-confdence is not the only
beneft of eating well. Certain nutrients can
help your sex life as well. Many ingredients
that are key to our overall health also help
you to function better sexually, says Linda De
Villers, sex therapist in Los Angeles. When
you arent getting your nutrients, not only are
you going to have poor health, youre going to
have a limp dick. People really underestimate
health and its effect on sex drive.
Chocolate may seem like the most clich
aphrodisiac, but it does do some good for our
bodies when it comes to the bedroom. A study
in The Journal of Sexual Medicine found that
those who consumed at least one ounce of
chocolate daily reported signifcantly greater
desire and better overall sexual function than
those who did not consume chocolate at all.
Chocolate is known to increase circulation
within the body which improves overall sexual
sensitivity and function.
While some people may think the whole
chocolate thing is a myth, it is actually the No. 1
aphrodisiacal food, De Villers says. The more
blood fow in your body, the more sensation
you will have down below.
Other circulation-enhancing dishes have
the ability to increase sexual pleasure as well.
Theresa Rose, psychoanalyst in Shawnee, says
the omega-3 in salmon can have a positive
effect on your sex life. Increased circulation
and the nutrients in omega-3 are going to
make you function better sexually.
A lesser known pleasure enhancer is
argininean amino acid that creates nitric
oxide. Nitric oxide is released from the lining
of the genitals when you become aroused and
it causes the blood vessels to expand. Without
enough nitric oxide, men are unable to get an
erection. Arginine is found in foods such as
oatmeal, nuts, wheat germ, milk and yogurt.
I really noticed that greasy foods tainted
my sex drive because I felt terrible, but anytime
I eat fruits, veggies, yogurts and low-calorie
dairies it makes me feel good and makes it
happen in the bedroom, Puljan says.
Though research is not defnitive on the
amino acid arginine, De Villers says adding
it to your diet cannot hurt. It makes sense.
Nitric Oxide is the stuff of Viagra, De Villers
says. If you can increase your supply of Nitric
Oxide it should help you to get an erection.
The other major ingredients to a strong
sex life are antioxidants. Found in most fruits
and vegetables, antioxidants help to keep
your arteries clean, and not surprisingly, your
blood fowing. Is a whole bottle going to
make you horny? says Pat Kaufman, licensed
sex therapist. No. But by including lots of
antioxidant-rich foods into your diet you will
feel better inside and out, therefore improving
your sex-drive. Blueberries, cranberries and
artichokes are some of the most antioxidant-
rich foods, according to the USDA.
The experts say there is no miracle drug
but eating a well-balanced diet full of fsh,
fruits and vegetables can help your desire to
have sex and also your ability to achieve full
satisfaction.
When I eat like shit the last thing I want
to do is get naked, says Rob Dillenback, Plano
senior. A pizza equals a nap, something less
flling and healthier makes me ready for some
sex.
De Villers agrees and says its all about
health. Sure these foods can help but eating
fve salmon in one day isnt going to help you.
Balance and moderation are the real recipe.
JP
Recipe for better sex
How your diet can improve your performance in the sack
By Megan Weltner
mweltner@kansan.com
Photo by Matt Bristow
Pecans and walnuts are good sources of omega-3, which improves circulation in your nether regions for better sex.
Chicken contains arginine, an amino acid that creates Nitric Oxide, which helps men and women both achieve orgasm.
Breakfast
Oatmeal with blueberries (high in both
antioxidants and arginine)
The antioxidants keep your arteries
clean and improve overall circulation.
The arginine produces nitric oxide. Nitric
oxide secretes from your genitals and
helps mens ability to get an erection and
womens ability to orgasm during sex.
Lunch
Tuna salad sandwich on wheat bread (the
wheat bread contains arginine and the
tuna contains Omega-3)
The arginine promotes the secre-
tion of nitric oxide, while the omega-3
improves circulation down below.
Snack
Yogurt or cottage cheese (both contain
arginine)
Increased nitric oxide secretion
making an erection or orgasm more
achievable.
Dinner
Salmon, sauted spinach and whole grain
roll (salmon contains omega-3, spinach is
high in antioxidants and the whole grains
contain arginine)
This meal gets it all done: increased
secretion of nitric oxide, cleansing of the
arteries and increased circulation.
From the kitchen of: Jayplay
Recipe: A days recipe for good sex
DONATE THE REST
These stores will take almost anything
you dont want to toss. Make sure items are
clean and in good repair, then call ahead for
specifc instructions.
Goodwill Store
2200 West 31st Street
785.331.3908
Penn House
1035 Pennsylvania Street
785.842.0440
St. Johns Rummage House
1246 Kentucky Street
785.331.2219
Social Service League Store
905 Rhode Island Street
785.843.5414
10
February 26, 2009
manual
April 23, 2009 10
Photo illustrations by Tyler Waugh
Captain Planet: Clothes that you put in Planet Aid
boxesseveral locations can be found around
Lawrenceare sold to secondhand stores and textile
recyclers, or sent directly to programs in Africa.
Does a mini-fridge take up more space
than a bookshelf? Will a bike ft in the trunk?
How many T-shirts worth of space does a CD
collection take up?
When the thrilland the partiesthat
mark the end of the school year wears off,
youll still be left to pack for the trip home,
for your ever-approaching August move, or
for that summer internship in the big city.
Dont get stuck with a home full of stuff, a
Dont throw THAT away
Theres a place for everything,
if youre willing to take everything to its place.
By Becka Cremer
bcremer@kansan.com
tiny car and the urge to toss everything into a
dumpster. Instead, plan ahead and donate your
unwanted stuff.
Students dont think about it, but the
end of the semester can sneak up on us,
says Jeff Severin, director of the Center for
Sustainability.
Start thinking about what items you
wont need in your next residence, and start
donating now. Begin with the items you wont
Planet Aid
816.472.1518
www.planetaid.org
Its no accident that the Planet Aid donation
boxes look like dumpsters, says Amanda Irvin,
area manager for Planet Aid.
The people who make donations to
Goodwill or The Salvation Army do that pretty
consistently, Irvin says. But then there are
people who typically throw things away. We
just give them an avenue for that stuff that isnt
the garbage.
Planet Aid sells donated items to
secondhand stores and textile recyclers or
sends items directly to programs in Africa.
Money from the sale of items goes to help the
same programs.
Planet Aid boxes can be found in front of
Yello Sub, 1814 West 23rd Street, and Offce
Depot, 2525 Iowa Street. All locations are
listed with this story at Kansan.com/jayplay.
Clothing
Bedding
Lawrence Humane Society
1805 East 19th Street
785.843.6835
www.lawrencehumane.org
You might hate the pattern on your old
sheets or crave new towels for your next
place, but the animals at the Lawrence Humane
Society would be happy with your old ones.
Drop off any clean, unwanted bedding, blankets,
towels and sheets at the Lawrence Humane
Society or the drop box at PetCo, 3115 Iowa
Street. The shelter gives the bedding to the
animals to make their stays more comfortable,
says Robin Evans, offce manager of the humane
society.
Audio-Reader
1120 West 11th Street
785.864.4600
http://reader.ku.edu
Kansas Audio-Reader Network collects
CDs, records, books on CD, musical
instruments and audio equipment of all kinds
(speakers, receivers, etc.) for its annual For
Your Ears Only sale. The sale is a fundraiser
for Audio-Reader, a reading and information
service for the blind. To donate, just drop
materials off at Audio-Reader, 1120 West 11th
Street, between 7 a.m. and 7 p.m., Monday
through Friday, or between 8 a.m. and noon,
Saturday and Sunday. Audio-Reader cannot
accept mix tapes or burned CDs or DVDs,
however.
We can only sell items that have been
commercially produced, Lori Kesinger,
program manager, says. Nothing needs to be
sealed or in the original packaging, but it all
needs to be usable, of course, because well
end up reselling it.
M
u
sic
Friends of the Lawrence Public
Library Drop Box
Lawrence Public Library
707 Vermont Street
The Friends of the Library drop box is the
easiest way to get rid of your unwanted books,
CDs and DVDs. Leave donations in the big
wooden box of the Lawrence Public Library.
The Friends of the Lawrence Public Library
will sell your stuff at its biannual book sale.
Books
The Lawrence Re-Cyclery
711 West 23rd Street
785.856.1236
The Re-Cyclery is a low-cost alternative to
a normal bike shop that buys, sells and fxes
bikes, says owner Brian Shay.Youre most likely
to score some cash for your bike at the Re-
Cyclery if its in working condition and you
originally bought it at a bike shop, Shay says. But
if you have a bike from Wal-Mart or a similar
department store that is in working condition,
the Re-Cyclery will take it as a donation.
Some bikes we can fx up, some bikes we
can take parts off, some bikes we pass along,
Shay says.
Lawrence Street
Maintenance Division
1120 Haskell Avenue
785.832.3031
Your broken bike doesnt need to be tossed
in a dumpster, though. Drop your bike at the
Lawrence Street Maintenance Division to
ensure it a better life. Bikes collected are taken
to the Lansing Correctional Facility where
inmates repair them before giving them away,
says Margie Baston, administrative support for
the facility.

Waste Reduction &
Recycling Division
785.832.3030
http://lawrenceks.org/wrr/hhw
There are some items you cant throw
in a dumpster, even if you want to. If you
have household cleaning products, poisons,
pesticides, paint, aerosol sprays or automotive
liquids, call theWaste Reduction and Recycling
Division. Youll need to set up a time to drop
off the items.
Dont worry, though, even hazardous waste
can be reused. Items that are still usable will go
to the Product ReUse Facility where they are
offered free of charge to anyone who wants to
set up an appointment to shop.
Check the City of Lawrence/Douglas
County Household Hazardous Waste Facility
website for a full list of items the facility
collects free of charge.
H
azardous
W
aste
Lawrence Humane Society
Garage Sale
Lawrence Humane Society
1805 East 19th Street
785.843.6835
www.lawrencehumane.org
The Lawrence Humane Society is accepting
anything but clothing for its garage sale. Take
items directly to the humane society unless
you have a large amount, says Robin Evans,
offce manager. For large donations, call ahead
so someone from the humane society can
meet you at a storage site.
The United Way of Douglas
County Community Garage Sale
785.843.6626
www.unitedwaydgco.org
If youre looking for a one-stop drop off for
all of your worldly possessions, arrange a time
to dump your stuff at the United Ways storage
container. The United Way of Douglas County
is collecting items for its community garage
sale, which will be held July 31 and August 1.
Unless your items are stained, ripped, broken
or hazardous, the United Way will accept
them, says Colleen Gregoire, vice president/
campaign manager for the United Way of
Douglas County.
Information about student-friendly
collection days should be available in May
through KU Environmental Stewardship,
Gregoire says. But if youre ready to drop
off items now, contact the United Way at
785.843.6626 or deliver items to the storage
container at the Eagles Lodge, 1803 West
Sixth Street, on May 14 between 6 and 8 p.m.,
on May 16 between 8 a.m. and noon, or on May
30 between 8 a.m. and noon.
Everything
Else
Bikes
CASH FOR
YOUR TRASH
For those willing to spend a little
time and go home with the items these
stores dont want, these second-hand
stores offer the chance at a little cash
for your trash.
Clothing
Wild Man Vintage
939 Massachusetts Street
785.856.0303
www.myspace.com/wildmanvintage
Platos Closet
3514 Clinton Parkway
785.832.2274
www.platoscloset.com
Arizona Trading Company
736 Massachusetts Street
785.749.2377
Music
CD Tradepost
2540 Iowa Street
785.856.4253
721 Wakarusa
785.856.8733
www.cdtradepost.com
Hastings
1900 West 23rd Street
785.832.0719
www.hastingsentertainment.com
Kiefs Downtown Music
823 Massachusetts Street
785.843.9111
www.kiefs.com
Love Garden Sounds
936 1/2 Massachusetts Street
785.843.1551
www.lovegardensounds.com
Books
Half Price Books
1519 West 23rd Street
785.856.4253
www.halfpricebooks.com
The Raven Bookstore
8 East Seventh Street
785.749.3300
www.ravenbookstore.com
If you happen to have some paperback
mysteries laying around, trade them in at
The Raven. The Raven offers 20 percent
of the cover price in credit, says owner
Heidi Raak.
The Dusty Bookshelf
708 Massachusetts Street
785.749.4643
www.thedustybookshelf.com
THIS WEEKEND
Take unwanted or broken electronics
to Free State High School, 4700 Overland
Drive, on Saturday for the Lawrence
Electronic Recycling Event. Items will be
collected in the parking lot from 9 a.m.
to 1 p.m. You can ditch most items free of
charge, but youll have to pay $5 to get rid
of each computer monitor or TV set.
Photo illustration by Tyler Waugh
Swamped with stuff: Make money from your old
clothes, books, CDs and DVDs.
need before you move, such as winter clothes,
Severin says.
So when you move, its not really a rush
to dump everything in the trash and run. Plan
ahead so youre disposing of those things
responsibly, Severin says.
Lawrence has a wealth of donation
opportunities, so if you spend a little time
driving around town now, you can avoid the
dumpsters come move-out day.
11 April 23, 2009
12
April 23, 2009
manual
Photo by Becka Cremer
Green sense: Eco-Logic Dry Cleaners uses an
environmentally friendly process to dry clean your clothes.
Thanks to Eco-Logic Dry Cleaners, which
opened last month, Lawrence has a green way
to dry clean.
Eco-Logic, 2540 South Iowa Street, uses the
GreenEarth Cleaning process to dry clean your
duds. The only solvent used in the GreenEarth
process is liquid silicone, says Eddie Ocampo,
whose parents own Eco-Logic. Liquid silicone
is not harmful to the environment and it breaks
down into sand, water and carbon dioxide,
Ocampo says.
The GreenEarth process preserves the
softness and color of clothing, and it doesnt
have the usual just-dry-cleaned smell. And,
Ocampo says, the average cost of dry cleaning
the GreenEarth way is about the same as
taking your clothes to a traditional cleaner.
But do we really need a greener dry
cleaning process?
The Environmental Protection Agency
thinks so.
About 85 percent of dry cleaners use a
toxic chemical called perchloroethylene, or
perc, to treat stains, according to the EPA.
Perc must be disposed of carefully, and can
pollute the air, water and the ground. Perc is
also dangerous for people. Overexposure to
the chemicals can cause liver damage and, early
studies show, may also lead to cancer.
So, when youre deciding where to take your
dry clean-only clothes, consider the process
used by your dry cleaner. Eco-Logic might be
the best choice for youand the earth.
For more information, visit www.
greenearthcleaning.com or www.epa.gov.
Becka Cremer
Earth-friendly dry cleaning
DIY:
[ d o i t y o u r s e l f ]
How to avoid hander-
outers on campus
They are the sharks in the sea of people.
You can spot them in people-laden places,
looking for the person who shows weakness.
If you make eye contact or arent on your cell
phone, they will attack you with their spiel.
The spiel is what they want you to do, which
can vary from voting for a Student Senate
representative to joining the rowing team to
joining Hara Krishna.
Odds are that dont want to be affronted
by these people, why else would they need to
recruit in the frst place?
Max Sprague, Overland Park senior, says he
is a master in the art of avoidance. He tells
the Student Senate hassler that he already
voted. He gives the same spiel to anyone else
who bothers him between classes.
Below are some tactics to avoid these
people, or at least get them off your back as
quickly as possible.
The one-person call. Open your cell
phone and talk into it. This will show everyone
you arent interested whatsoever in the world
around you. If you are female, you can enhance
this tactic by wearing bug-eyed sunglasses, which
is perhaps the pinnacle of being anti-social.
Appear drunk or high. Walk unsteadily
and make your eyes into slits. Most hasslers
will ignore you because they wont want to
bring in the wrong kind of person. If the
hander-outers do talk to you, ask them or if
they have any food. If they say no and go back
into their spiel, say, No seriously, do you have
any food? If they say yes, then you will get
some food.
Adam Schoof
Photo by Adam Schoof
Hungry as wolves: Avoid eye contact if you dont want
your day to be disrupted by campus hander-outers.
Rid yourself of junk mail
Although she doesnt count, Mindy
Pressman guesses she gets about fve pieces of
junk mail for every piece of legit mail.
She says that she has used the coupons she
gets a few times, but that she fnds the vast
amount of junk mail she receives a waste.
I would forego my lifetime savings from
junk mail coupons if it meant that I never
received another one, says Pressman, San
Diego graduate student. I dont use the
overwhelming majority of the stuff I get.
One option for junk mail is to recycle it
like Michelle Kanga does. Kanga, Rockville,
Maryland, graduate student, says she recycles
all her junk mail. However, recycling does not
make up for the energy it took to get the junk
mail to her. When you account for the energy
it takes to print the junk mail, transport it
and recycle it, junk mail seems like a massive
waste.
Getting your name off junk mail lists can
be time consuming and require you to send
out letters of your own. Step-by-step manuals
detailing how to stop junk mail from invading
your mailbox are available at www.ecocycle.org
and www.junkbusters.com.
If you dont have the time to get your
name off the junk mailing lists, then there
are companies who will do it for you. Tonic
Mailstopper, at mailstopper.tonic.com, claims to
prevent 90 percent of junk mail for $20 a year.
41 Pounds, at www.41pounds.org, offers to rid
you of 80 to 95 percent of your junk mail for
$41 for fve years.
Adam Schoof
Photo by Adam Schoof
Coupon bonanza: If junk mail is taking over your mailbox,
you can get your name off junk mail lists in a few steps.
Thursday April 30th
REFLECTION ETERNAL
TALIB KWELI & HI-TEK
Sunday April 26th
with Live Band
TICKETS ON SALE NOW!
Thursday April 30th
available for
large graduation party rental
You put it off too long. You just couldnt
be bothered, until now, and now is too late.
Your GPA has dropped below the minimum
and youve lost your scholarship. Youve taken
too many sick days and youve lost your job.
What can you do to recoup from a lost job or
scholarship?
Scholarships help students stay in school,
and many students depend on them. If Marina
Rasuk lost her scholarships, then shed have to
go back to Brazil, her home country. Having
two scholarships allows Rasuk, a freshman, to
spend her money on other things; shes says
shes buying a car next year.
But what could she do if she lost her
scholarships? What if you lose yours?
Lose your scholarship?
If youve lost a scholarship, then getting
it back depends on what type of scholarship
youve lost. If you received a scholarship from
the Offce of Admissions and Scholarships,
then you have the option to appeal. The offce
requires students to maintain a 3.25 GPA and
complete 24 credit hours between fall and
spring to keep their scholarships.
The only hoops we ask a student to jump
through are academics, says Gail Sherron,
associate director at the Offce of Admissions
and Scholarships. Were trying to be as nice
and fair as possible.
If you dont meet the GPA and credit hour
requirements, the offce will send you a letter
about your opportunity to appeal.
To appeal, you provide the offce with your
ARTS form, an appeals form and other personal
information. The latter is your opportunity to
provide personal information not on the ARTS
form, Sherron says.
Another option is to fnd another
scholarship. Websites such as www.fastweb.com
and FAFSA, or Free Application for Federal
Student Aid, at www.fafsa.ed.gov, could be good
starting points.
If your scholarship appeal isnt approved or
if you cant fnd another, then you might need
to take out a loan to stay in college. Although
it might be a fnancial burden later, many
students, such as Jake Bustad, Granger, Iowa,
graduate student, prefer not to think about
it. Bustad says he has enough student loans
to equal the GDP of a small island nation.
He says he likes to put off thinking about his
student loans because there isnt anything he
can do about it now.
I like to think about it as a couple of
luxury cars that Ill never own but get to pay
for anyway, Bustad says.
Loans come with daunting fnancial
responsibility; this is something Lawrence
Henderson, Lansing law student, realizes.
Henderson says hell graduate law school with
more than $66,000 in debt.
While I do have a job waiting for me and
I know I can make enough to pay off those
loans in short order, (in a slumping economy
its) not something I want to be responsible
for, Henderson says.
In addition to his student loans, Henderson
has a grant that has helped him pay for
college.
If I didnt have the grant (and student loans),
then Id just have to take out more in loans,
Henderson says. Despite his loans substantial
amount, Henderson says he considers himself
lucky that he will get out of law school with
only $66,000 in debt.
Lose your job?
Some people, however, dont want to have
such a burden and decide to work their way
through college. But how would they stay
afoat if they lost their job? If you lose your
job, then the most sensible thing to do is to
get another.
The University posts jobs on www.
kucareerhawk.com. To access them, you have
to activate an account with KU Career
Connections. Both on- and off-campus job
postings are listed on the site, says Ann Hartley,
associate director at the University Career
Center. The site is geared toward graduates,
but anyone can get an account.
But this shouldnt be the only place you
look. Hartley says she suggests persistence
in looking for a job. The most critical thing,
Hartley says, is networking, which will open
more doors than applying to businesses in
which you have no connection. However,
the basics still apply: If you dont have a solid
rsum, your contact in the company wont do
you much good.
If you need help with your rsum, cover
letters or anything else to do with fnding a job,
Hartley says you should come to the Career
Center, which is in the basement of the Burge
Union.
Hartley also suggests going to the centers
next career fair, which is from 1:30 p.m. to 4
p.m. on April 30 in the ffth level of the Kansas
Union. The fair, which is also sponsored by the
School of Business, features employers who
are hiring now. JP
13
April 23, 2009
manual
What to do when
things go wrong
Lost your scholarship? Job?
Heres how to get them back
By Adam Schoof
aschoof@kansan.com
Photo illustration by Ryan Waggoner
Forget to raise that GPA for your scholarship or lose
that part-time job? Not to worryyou have only a few
hoops to jump through before getting a new job or your
scholarship back.
Career workshop today

Did you wait until the last weeks of
school to look for a job? Dont know
how to get one? In addition to the Just
in Time Career Fair on April 30, the
University Career Center is hosting a
Better Late Than Jobless workshop
from 4 p.m. to 5:30 p.m. today in the
Burge Union. The workshop will show
you how to identify the job you want
to search for, how to create or update
a rsum and how to network with
companies.
S
14 April 23, 2009
&
A
Q
Alex Ward of
The Noise FM
Photo by Chris Mullins
Noisemakers: The Noise FM is from Fort Scott and will be playing at the Replay Lounge Friday at 10 p.m. Band
member Alex Ward is also a substitute teacher and has come across a few fans in the classes he has taught.
When Alex Ward isnt working as substitute
teacher or census worker, hes singing, playing
guitar and keys in The Noise FM. The Noise FM
is a local trio that was spawned in Fort Scott
in 2005. The band has had some success in the
Midwest with the single, Circles. Its new EP is
available for free at www.thenoisefmmusic.com.
The band will be playing at the Replay Lounge
Friday at 10 p.m., $2 to $3 at the door. Ward
gives Jayplay some insight on the worst gigs,
odd jobs and the vanity of musicians.
How would you describe your music?
There arent any pretensions; were playing
accessible rock and roll. We had prog-rock
tendencies but over the last year and a half
weve switched to dancier music. Its fun, but
its not dumbed down by any means. Were
trying to do fairly intelligent dance rock.
Whats the most memorable gig youve
had?
The most memorable ones are the
extremely awkward performances. We did
beneft concerts that were fashion shows
in Kansas City. We were playing for runway
models, I use that term loosely, and tried to
be serious about it, but you just feel goofy
when people are modeling wears in front of
you. It was a lot of men modeling underwear
scantily clad men moving to our music.
Have you ever had a gig that was so
awkward that it just turned bad?
Id say about 50 percent of the shows are
like that (laughs). Southeast Kansas will always
be interesting, like a dive called Lurchs Bar in
Parsons, Kansas. We played on the foor; the
sound system was terrible. Its a biker bar and
were just a bunch of kids. Its known for Lurch
burgers, which are two pounds of grease and a
guy named Lurch makes it and brings it to you.
And he looks like a Lurch. Hes a sweaty, tall
guy. We thought the burgers and drinks were
on the house, and about a week later we got
an e-mail from someone saying we skipped out
on our tab. Evidentially those burgers are how
Lurch makes his money.
Have you had any fans in a class you
were substitute teaching for?
One of the frst times I subbed in Eudora
I had a kid recognize me from a show. Ive
had a couple instances where kids recognize
me from a show. One kid has a sticker on his
binder in the class I was subbing. Im trying to
be strict and play the teacher role but the kid
was cool and had bought our CD.
Why do you make music? What does it
do for you?
I just naturally started doing it because my
dad was in bands all of his lifemy brother
and I were just born into it, I guess.
Obviously theres a creative release that
any musical artist gets through expressing
themselves through their music. I feel like Im
a fairly modest, laid-back guy, but theres a
certain degree of vanity if youre a musician.
You want people to hear your songs. You get
some sort of satisfaction from people hearing
what youve created. I want people to hear it.
Ross Stewart
notice
Visit
guide.kansan.com
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I want food delivered
Whats open?
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Jessica Sain-Baird
Girl 1: I saw two snakes having sex on
Valentines Day.
Girl 2: Yeah, thats the perfect day for
animal babies. Thats probably why
they have Valentines Day on that day.
Girl 1: I have a pair of underwear that
has orange and black skulls on it.
Girl 2: You better only wear them
on Halloween so people dont think
youre punk rock.
Professor: What crossword are you doing?
Student: The UDK. Im on a roll.
Professor: Well, fnish.
Bus driver (to student): You
were running really fast to
the bus this morning! Have
you ever thought about
joining the cross country
team?
Girl 1: I hate that Im
wearing all brown.
Girl 2: Do you feel like you
work at UPS?
Girl: I want to see
Michael Phelps rap
and Jay-Z swim a lap.
Girl: When you have class with that
professor you just need to take your
syllabus and light it on fre.
Girl: Ecstasy is such a hard drug.
Guy: Dont talk to me about hard
drugs until you are drinking paint
thinner on the weekends.
Girl 1: I cant decide if I want to get bangs.
Girl 2: Did you just say you cant decided if
you want to get banged?!
15 April 23, 2009
Professor: Well,
communists can be
attractive people, too.
Professor: If I ever had a little
boyI dont think I have one out
there nowId name him Gustav
and Id paint eyebrows on him.
Here Gustav, you little bastard!
Guy 1: Even the Natural History
Museum Twitters.
Girl 1: What do they say?
Girl 2: Dinosaursstill extinct.
Girl (reading a textbook):
Hawaii was the frst state to
legalize abortion in 1970.
Guy: Cowabunga!
Professor: RAM is
random-access mamory,
ahem, memory. I dont
know why I said that. My
wifes in Wichita.
Girl: Dammit, I have Michael
Jackson in my head.
Guy: Better than in your bed.
Girl: Speak for yourself.
Girl: I know several people
who insist on drinking beer
and then fgure skating.
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16
April 23, 2009
contact
I just recently started dating someone
Ive been friends with for a while. But
were both kind of nervous about
how this decision will be received by
our mutual friends. How can we best
break the news?
Brandon, freshman
Carly: Its understandable to be nervous,
because you can defnitely expect your friends
to throw their two cents in. Before you tell
them whats up, make sure that you two are
prepared. Be ready in case one (or more)
friend decides to tell you that its a bad idea. I
think its best to divide and conquer.
Have your signifcant other tell some friends
and you tell the others. Dont tell them all at
once so you can avoid feeling as if your friends
are ganging up on you. Dont dance around the
subject, either. Just say, So, Susie and I started
dating recently. When one of your friends
starts to protest, assure them that things wont
be awkward when youre together (and in case
you break up). Listen to what they have to say,
but dont let it change your relationship. Itll be
hard to balance your respect for your friends
with your new relationship, but its nothing
that strong friendships cant handle.
Elliot: The most important thing here is that,
no matter when you decide to break the news,
you are on the same page. Youll never be able
to control how your friends react. However,
making sure that you dont put your new
girlfriend in a tight spot is something you can
control. So preparing yourselves for whatever
reaction might come is all you can do.
I agree with Carly. Its not the best idea to
gather everyone around to tell them all the
great news. One by one, starting with the most
reliably calm friend you have, pull everyone
aside to let them know. Be calm, be cool, and be
casual. You two are not divulging state secrets;
youre just letting your buds know that youve
started dating. If your friends cant handle that,
then thats their problem.
7
April 9, 2009
contact
Bitch
MOAN
&
with Carly Halvorson and Elliot Kort
Have relationship questions or need some
advice? E-mail bitchandmoan@kansan.com.
*Bitch and Moan is not to be considered as a
substitute for professional help.
So, my girlfriends a coffee addict.
She drinks the stuff constantly. Thats
not what bothers me. What bugs me
is that when shes not on campus, she
goes solely to a coffee house where
(wait for it) her ex is a barista. Hes
there all the time. How should I feel
about this?
Tim, senior
Carly: I cant tell you how you should feel,
but I can already tell how you really do feel
youre bothered by it. Thats understandable.
Before you get too upset and say something
to her about it, take some things into
consideration. For example: Who initiated
the breakup, and on what terms? I think its
possible for exes to be friendsor at least on
friendly terms. I know very little about coffee,
but all of my friends who claim to be coffee
addicts have their preferred coffee shop. Give
your girlfriend the beneft of the doubt; maybe
she visits that particular coffee shop because
of the coffee and not the ex. If it really bothers
you, ask to go with her sometime and gauge
her reaction. Id be suspicious if she says no,
but dont worry about it if she has no problem
with you coming along.
Elliot: Tim, I hear you. I feel your pain. People
can have paranoia concerning their signifcant
others exes. We wonder how we measure
up. We worry that said ex has an agenda. And
because we worry about all of these things, we
end up sabotaging ourselves. So, like Carly said,
I cant tell you how to feel about it. However, I
can remind you that many logical people have
been rendered utterly illogical by letting their
hearts do most of the thinking. So heres
what you do: go with your gal to her favorite
spot. Right when a lump of suspicion begins to
rise in your throat, remind yourself that shes
I went on a date with someone I met
out at a bar, and I had a great time.
My problem is that hes older
considerably older. Im 21, and hes
34. Should I just quit now?
Elizabeth, junior
Carly: My frst reaction when I read that
was, Oh damn. To be totally honest, I would
stop seeing him as soon as possible. You havent
even fnished college yet, and hes at the age
where hes probably looking to settle down and
create a stable life. My mom is a big advocate
of not tying yourself down when youre young.
If I came to her with this problem, shed tell
me to stop dating him and go have some fun
with some people closer to my age. Well, frst
she would ask what the hell I was thinking, and
then shed tell me that. But I digress. My point
is that you need to be with people who are
going through the same experiences that you
areat the same time. Do you really want to
hear, When I was your age from your
boyfriend? Thats the kind of thing your parents
and older relatives say.
Elliot: What Im about to say will seem
very at odds with my position as an advice
columnist. Youve been warned. Here goes
nothing: Why do you care what I have to say?
Why do you care what anyone else has to say?
You had a great time with this guy. Thats the
important thing. If he makes you happy, the
unconventional nature of your relationship
becomes an inconsequential point. Certainly,
from your letter, it seems as though youre
skeptical. Sure, it might take some getting used
to. But at this point, youre an adult. You get
to act like one and choose how to live your
own life.
there in his place of business with you.
You have nothing to worry about. Just try to
keep yourself from over thinking. Itll save you
a lot of heartache and worry. Plus, you could
get a genuinely tasty beverage out of the deal.
Contributed photo
Tick tock: Mary Ralstin and Elon Sharton-Bierig didnt
exactly rush into each others arms when they frst met,
but after three years, they fell for each other.
For some, romance is quick, and ascends
in a rush. For others, it makes sense to take
more time. For Mary Ralstin, Shawnee alumna,
and Elon Sharton-Bierig, Deerfeld, Illinois,
senior, the process of arriving at courtship
took years.
The two were introduced in Fall 2004,
during Elons freshman and Marys sophomore
year. After that, they fell off of each others
radar until she returned from studying abroad
the following year. As they both spent a lot of
time hanging out in Hashinger Hall, the two
found themselves in mutual company often,
though their chemistry did not immediately
click.
We had a ton of mutual friends from
Hash, Mary says. So it wasnt just the two of
us alone.
After accompanying one another on
countless all-night homework sessions, the
two began to develop a mutual crush. But both
were discouraged after series of missed signals
and dropped cues. Finally, in Spring 2007, Elon
decided to make his move. With the prospect
of leaving Lawrence permanently and going to
the Chicago Institute of Art, he considered his
options.
How We
Met
Id really lost hope at one point, he says.
But even in the face of this challenge, he
asked her out anyway.
I was like, OK ... if you come back, Mary
says.
Elon spent the next frenzied summer putting
together a portfolio but forgetting to obtain
all the required letters of recommendation.
In retrospect, he thinks he subconsciously
sabotaged himself so that he could return to
Lawrence and give the delayed romance a shot.
Their frst date was in Fall 2007 and the two
are planning to move in together next fall. For
them, it was just a matter of time.
Elliot Kort
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turn to you in a time of need, she knows it. In
the end, the only person who can know what
shes going through is her. Show that youre
available if she needs and then let her take the
next step.
17
April 23, 2009
contact
Have relationship questions or need
some advice? E-mail bitchandmoan@
kansan.com. *Bitch and Moan is not to
be considered as a substitute for profes-
sional help.
My roommate is absolutely miserable.
She and I arent really that great of
friends, but its so hard to ignore that
something is going on. She sits in her
room and cries all the time. How do I
approach her to see whats wrong? I
feel like it might come off the wrong
way because were not close. I dont
want to be nosy. I really do want to
help her.
Melissa, freshman
Carly: Oh yeah, theres defnitely something
wrong. Based on what you said, it sounds as
if shes really depressed. Im sure she would
really appreciate you wanting to help her.
To avoid coming off as nosy or intruding on
her space, just take some small steps to reach
out to her. Do something to show that youre
concerned about her and that youre willing to
be a friend to her. Try leaving a note on her
door or on her bed. Maybe even leave a small
gift, just so that she knows that someone is
thinking about her and has gone the extra mile
to show that they care. She may not want to
talk to you, and thats her choice to make. If she
turns down your offer, say something like, OK,
but just know that Im here if you change your
mind. That will leave the door open for her in
the future, when she feels more comfortable.
Elliot: Melissa, its clear you genuinely care
about your roommate. And it seems to me that
the best thing you can do for your roommate
is make sure she knows too. Youre worried
about coming off as pushy or nosy. Pushy and
nosy come when you insist that you know
what to do to help her out.
The way to avoid that situation is to let her
know that youve noticed shes depressed and
that youre there for her if she needs anything.
If she needs a shoulder to cry on, youll be
there. If she just needs to know that she can
continued from page 16
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18
April 23, 2009
review
story with a sense of believability.
His ability to touch everything with a gentle
humor helps to make the book a coming of age
novel and a love story. How much of the book is
nonfction, and in the broader scheme of things,
how much of non-fction is invented, Benoiff
leaves the reader to ponder. Readers will not
be disappointed by Benoiffs latest blockbuster.
BOOK: City of Thieves by David Benioff
The novel itself is shrouded in mystery,
marketed as fction but printed with the
compelling frst chapter of David Benioffs
interview with his possibly nonfctional, knife-
fghting grandfather. Benioff pulled his comment
thanking his grandfather for the late-night calls
and similar elements from the reprinting and is
now claiming his ingenious plot was invented.
Whether the events that span the novel
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or not, Benioff s in-depth research of the city
of Leningrad and its starving Russian people
during the Nazis siege weave together a
communitys story of survival. The protagonist,
Lev, a Jewish teenager arrested for looting
a German corpse, must survive by stealing
something much more precious than money:
a dozen eggs for the Colonels beloved
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and charming deserter charged with the same
task, have a week to fnd their treasure and
win back their ration cardstheir keys to
food and, therefore, to life.
As the pair traverses war-torn Russia,
escaping cannibals and crossing enemy
lines, they are ultimately introduced to the
atrocities of the war and the depth of the
human spirit. Benoiff masterfully navigates the
emotions of adolescence, as well as the scenes
of devastation, hope and loss, while leaving the Meghan Nuckolls
I promise hes not an accessory.
Hes my best small friend.
The cold morning air pierces every inch of
my skin. The uninformed decision to venture
out coatless was an awful mistake. The only
motivation I fnd is coming from the fve-pound
ball of fur prancing about in front of me. Bitterly
cold, and just plain bitter at the moment, I
brave the conditions for my little buddy. After
all, he is going to be stuck all day in an empty
apartment by his lonesome. Eventually he will
stop to sniff around, creeping ever so close to
his favorite tree. I dont say a word. Dont make
a motion. Dont do anything that might disturb
his morning routine. Oh, maybe wait for
it YES! Finally, it happens. I look down and
see the fruits of his laborthree peanut-sized
turds. All that pain, all that agony for that? He
leaps in my direction looking for approval,
hoping that he has, in fact, been a good boy.
My puppy, Reilly, looks like a dog and
barks somewhat like a dog, yet at best he is
only a miniscule version of a canine. Reilly is a
miniature Yorkshire terrier, a black and brown
ball of fuff with an abundance of energy. I am
a 6-foot, 210-pound former college baseball
player trying to navigate my way through
graduate school. Somewhere soon you will
fnd our mugs next to the defnition of an odd
couple.
My mom spent years pleading with my dad
for a Yorkie until he eventually broke down and
bought her one. The only problem was Bling
(my dads ridiculous name choice), became
attached to my dad. So when my mom retired,
my dad bought her another Yorkie. The only
setback was Lil Sis, as the kennel had named
her, seemed too distraught to leave her Lil
Brother behind. My mom decided I needed
a puppy, and my apartment would make the
perfect home for this cute little guy.
I wasnt so sure. I was skeptical at frst
when my parents offered me this furry little
fellow. I always wanted a puppy to call my own,
but the vision I had was signifcantly larger than
Reilly. I saw myself with a much more manly
breedpossibly a Boxer or a chocolate Lab.
Despite my apprehension, my affnity for mans
best friend got the best of me. As soon as I saw
him my skepticism vanished, and I accepted my
parents undersized gift.
Born on April 17, 2008, he was edging close
to 5 months old when my parents brought
19
April 23, 2009
speak
By Kristopher McDonald
kmcdonald@kansan.com
Photo by Ryan Waggoner
Kristopher was hesitant at frst about getting such a small dog, but he eventually
gave in to Reillys cuddly and energetic nature.
My lil buddy
Photo by Ryan Waggoner
Kristophers Yorkie, Reilly, cant go a day without dressing up
in one of his dozens of outfts.
him to me in September. At that point, he was
tipping the scales at a massive 3.5 poundsthe
Polo shirt my mom dressed him in accounted
for the half pound. My mom is one of those
silly people who believes tiny animals should
wear clothes, but not mewell, at least thats
what I thought.
I had promised
my mother that my
dog would never
wear clothes. My
girlfriend promised
my mother that our
dog would never
wear clothes. My
dog now wears
clothes.
I lost the battle
not with my mom,
but with Reilly. I took
off his shirt when
my mom left, and he
was infuriated. He
jumped off my lap
and moped around
my apartment. I
tried everything to
get him to play, but
he wouldnt. Finally,
I gave in and put his
shirt back on. You
would have thought
he won the puppy
lotto as he snuggled
up next to my cheek and covered it with little
puppy kisses. Its embarrassing to say but he
possibly has more clothes than my 22-year-
old girlfriend, Cara. He has a shirt or outft for
every occasion. He even has a lime green pair
of jammiesyes, he has freakin lime-green
full-body pajamas that are adorned with little
monkeys.
This is where I used to draw the line. I
refused to walk him when he is wearing his
favorite PJs. I used to pawn him off on Cara
when people giggled and asked about him. Oh,
ummm, yeah he is my girlfriends dog, I would
say. Then, I bought him a Braves tag to spruce
up his manly image, but Cara told me I could
no longer deny him, considering a girl would
never put that on her dog. Its not that I was
embarrassed to take
ownership, but
Id always think: Is
everyone snickering
because he is so
damn cute or are they just laughing at me? It
took me a while, but I fnally realized I couldnt
live without Reilly. He truly is my best small
friend. I no longer deny ownership of my buddy,
but he still knows how to make my cheeks
nice and rosy red from time-to-time on our
adventures.
Last week, I took him on a walk around
the block. We nearly made it all the way home
without any incidents, but then the apartment
security guard whipped around the corner to
lock up the leasing offce. As he opened his
car door, Reilly attackedas much as a fve-
pound fur ball can attackand the wannabe
5-0 proudly stated, Oh no! We got a killer on
the loose. Really, Reilly? Im pretty certain I
made the mans night. For a moment, there was
someone else in the world even less manly
than a rent-a-cop. Despite all the blushing and
the rapid loss of masculinity points, I wouldnt
trade Reilly for any other mass of fur in the
world.
When I come home from one those of
seemingly never-ending bad days, all of my
worries disappear the moment I open my back
door. Reilly, perched on his favorite chair, is
always waiting for me, ready to cover my face
with a dash of his puppy love.
Friday was his frst birthday, and I made it
special for him. I gave him his favorite treats,
rolled around on the foor with him, played
fetch with his favorite little bunny and made him
his favorite food: chicken. After all he deserves
it, he is the best gift Ive ever receiveda gift
that truly just keeps giving. JP
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