PASTORAL THEOLOGY Group Work/Documentation of the Project RESPECT: A DEGRADED MORAL VALUE IN CHRISTIAN FAMILIES IN URBANIZED AREAS

Submitted by: Fr. Takei Antonio Sr. Juliet Bautista Nenette Dizon Wylene Lim Susan Loya *************************************************** Fr. Anthony Nguyen, SDB Professor

I. TITLE OF THE PROJECT RESPECT: A DEGRADED MORAL VALUE OF CATHOLIC FAMILIES IN URBANIZED AREAS II. BACKGROUND OF THE PROJECT The members of the group are either direct workers or volunteer workers of different community and parish ministries we belong. We have observed that none of us belongs in the same community or organization. But, we have a similar point of reference- our own families. From every experience of each member of the group, we looked into what is already happening not only to our own families but what could be also similar to other Catholic families in urbanized areas of today. We all shared discussions and recounted both positive and negative experiences of each individual in his or her own family. We critically looked onto the negative experiences shared as well. The group observed and decided that it is the value of respect that is seen as the root cause of all that is happening and changing. Each of us agreed that there is indeed a degrading of respect as a moral value that is critical in forming a strong Catholic family life. Each group members expressed the intention to work on a project that they can bring home to their own families and furthermore can help in the ministries we are all serving. III. MAIN OBJECTIVE OF THE PROJECT The "principle of giving honour", the recognition and respect due to man precisely because he is a man, is the basic condition for every authentic educational process.1 Regardless of religion, or preference, or status in life, or even we know or do not know a person- respect is a kind of value that is expected from all of us in how we relate to others. All of us have in one way or another learned to relate one another from school from our kindergarten or pre-school years all the way through our college years and eventually into our choosing of our own career and then in our workplaces. However, we should not overlook that even before our academic years started, all our learning journey started at our own homes. All that we learn on how to relate, give, share, and love comes from teachings passed onto us since we are still younger and not able to walk, talk, read, write For this reason, the group assumes the main objective of this project is To inspire the family in making the Home as a school for Human Enrichment. Furthermore, this project would like to propose to solve the problem of disrespect that is evident in each own families, and to enable us help in relating and teaching the value of respect in the different ministries and communities we all belong and serving. IV. SIGNIFICANCE OF THE PROJECT This project is carried out with the hope that it will; 1.
1

Enrich our Trinitarian faith, being guided by the same principles to help form stronger

Pope John Paul II, Letter to Families: Year of the Family (2 February, 1994). Makati: Pauline Publishing House, 1994.

bond of families. 2. Communicate how the Eucharistic love is continually given in each families. 3. Contribute to nation building as family is the basic society of our nation. 4. Help in how to better relate with the people we encounter in the ministry or community we are serving. 5. Ultimately, share this project to our own families. V. SCOPE AND LIMITATION For the purpose of this project, the information gathered here pertains only to our own Catholic families situated in the urban area. This means that we are not covering here the families of other religion or faith and those living in rural areas. VI. DEFINITION OF TERMS Again for the purpose of this project, please be guided of the following terms used: 1. Respect - This comes from Latin word respectus, literally means, act of looking back - A relation or reference to a particular thing or situation - An act of giving particular attention (consideration) - A high or special regard (esteem) - The quality or state of being (esteemed) 2. Moral - This comes from Latin word moralis, from mor-, mos, which means custom - Of or relating to principles of right and wrong in behavior - Expressing or teaching a conception of right behavior - Capable of right and wrong action - Perceptual or psychological rather than tangible or practical in nature or effect 3. Value - From past participle of Latin word valre, which means to be worth, be strong - Worth, high quality - Relative worth, or importance - Something (as a principle or quality) intrinsically valuable or desirable 4. Family - From Latin word familia, this means household (including servants as well as kin of the householder), from famulus, which means servant - Basic unit in society traditionally consisting of two parents rearing their children - A group of individuals living under one roof and usually under one head

- A group of persons of common ancestry (clan), common stock (race), common affiliation (fellowship) 5. Urban - From Latin word urbanus, this means city - Of, relating to, characteristic of, or constituting a city - No single definition because of national differences, different countries define according to size or density of settlement in the area - There is a different way of life and usually a higher standard of living than are found in rural areas. VII. METHODOLOGY The situation-based analysis is used by the group through SEE-JUDGE-ACT methodology for this project: A. SEE I. Groups Observations From the discussions of the group members we were able to come up with the following observations and classified them into both internal and external factors affecting the parents and their children especially youth:

PARENTS

YOUTH

INTERNAL FACTORS

Not traditional family due to economic, or social concerns (e.g. single parents, with relatives, interracial marriages) Little time ( or no time) with children especially for both parents working here or abroad

Confusion of youth of what is wrong and right in regards with traditional family of peers Little time ( or no time) with parents due to many school or after school extracurricular activities

Rely on others for parenting such as teachers, relatives, etc. Failing to communicate things for time, e.g. (substitutes material technology, money,

Rely on others to idolize such as models, artist, or teachers, relatives, etc.

misperceptions formed) Less or no opportunity to practice Catholic traditions that would bond the family (e.g. Substitutes this with time with friends, or other people available to spend time with

Attending Holy mass together, meal table)

them

Different conflicts of interests (e.g. plans) with their children

Does not want to be forced into something; they want to choose for themselves

Lack of appreciation for the effort done by the youth to interact with the parents (e.g. serving them or being with them) Bad example (in the way of living e.g. vices, livelihood)

Lack of appreciation for the positive side of things given to them only sees the negative side; wants to get more Mirrors the bad example

PARENTS

YOUTH

EXTERNAL FACTORS

They want to keep up with high lifestyle of their peers, too much materialism

Youth tends to communicate more in social media (facebook, twitter, blogs, etc. and misperceptions formed)

Media shows getting more means success

The media shows that disrespecting parents is okay nowadays

Examples Shown in Media are the following: 1. Modern Family

Modern Family is an American television comedy series that first debuted September 2009 that depicts how modern families are coping nowadays in challenges of both traditional and non-traditional families in this age of technological advances, inter-racial marriages and same-sex marriages.

2.

Lazy Song by Mars Bruno Today I dont feel like doing anything I just wanna lay on my bed Dont feel like picking up my phone, So leave a message at the tone Cause today I swear Im not doing anything.

Yeah, I might mess around And get my college degree I bet my old man will be so proud of me But sorry pops, youll just have to wait Oh yes, I said it, I said it! I said it cause I can! Lazy Song is a popular song playing now in our radio that subtly says and empowers the youth or the children in a family that is just okay to not follow always your parents. This is in a way makes one cool as the message is coming from Bruno Mars, whom is most idolized by the youth of today. II. Groups Encapsulation of the Project (thru Film Excerpt)

Anak is a Filipino film that debuted to cinema houses last May 2000 and is said to be a tribute to the considered modern heroes of our country the Overseas Filipino Workers (OFW) that sacrificed their being away to their own children in order to give the best of providing for the needs of the family.

The excerpt of the film shows the actual confrontation between both the protagonist Vilma Santos (mother) and Claudine Barreto (her daughter) [as shown in the picture]. The mother is demanding at a minimum respect from her children if they cannot love her back in return in spite of the sacrifices shed done abroad. B. JUDGE After reflecting on the current family situation in most families in the urban areas (which may also apply in rural areas), the conclusion is that it results to a dysfunctional family. To describe briefly a dysfunctional family, the following issues are evident: a) Broken relationships

b) Communication Gap between parents and children c) Differences in perceptions resulting to misaligned expectations

In finding ways to solve these difficult situations in the family, the group referenced two sources for this project: I. Word of God The group sourced out the Word of God in what should be done with how to make a strong family not only in the old times but even today in our contemporaries. 1. 2. 3. 4. Honour your father and mother (Exodus 20:12) But you remain faithful to what you have learned and believed, because you know from whom you learned it, and that from infancy (2 Timothy 3:14-15) I am the good shepherd. A good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep. (John 10) The child grew and became strong; he was full of wisdom, and Gods blessings were upon him. Every year the parents of Jesus went to Jerusalem for the Passover Festival. When Jesus was twelve years old, they went to the festival as usual. (Luke 2: 40-42) Day after day they met as a group in the Temple, and they had their meals together in their homes, eating with glad and humble hearts, praising God, and enjoying the good will of all the people. And every day the Lord added to their group those who were being saved. (Acts 2:46-47)

5.

II.

Church Documents We also referenced Catholic Church documents regarding families and how it should be taken care of. The group has selected some references to remind us how families are important to the Church.

1.

Family as Communion of People in Trinitarian Aspect Our Christian families, like the Church itself, share in the Communion of Persons and Love of the Blessed Trinity (CFC 1015, CCC 2205) The family is, so to speak, the domestic Church (LG 11) The Church in the home, the basic unit of Christian life, the first school of discipleship (PCP II Decrees; Art.48; PCP II Doc. 421, 576) It is where we come to exercise the daily Christian virtues.

2.

Family as First School The family is a community of persons, serving life through the procreation and education of offspring, participating in the development of society, and sharing in the mission of the Church (CFC 1010, PCP II 575)

The family constitutes an irreplaceable school in developing, guarding and transmitting the social virtues and values of respect, dialogue, generous service, justice and love. (CFC 1019) Christianity pervades the mode of family life, and gradually transforms it; one will find the practice and an excellent school of the lay apostolate (LG 35) 3. Family in Difficult Circumstances We can realize how important prayer is with families threatened by division (JPII Letter to Families; Art.14) Let prayer, the source of light and strength and the nourishment of Christian hope never be neglected. (Familiaris Consortio; Art.77) Do not be afraid to take risks. Gods strength is far more powerful than difficulties. The educational power of the Eucharist: Christ given himself to us as food and drink. (JPII Letter to Families; Art. 18) C. ACT With the groups goal of making the home a school for human enrichment, recommended steps are endorsed in building a strong family life. 1. 2. 3. Understand the spouses commitment to the sacrament of matrimony. Live more fully the principles of Christian personal relationship Make the home the center for family life. The tag line Home is not a place, it is a feeling to reiterate that family members would enjoy going home after their daily activities outside because of the joyful and loving atmosphere. 4. Let the family members learn endurance and the joy of work joy, fraternal love, generous and repeated forgiveness and divine worship in prayer. 5. 6. 7. Exercise greater control over the family use of media and time. Develop Christian peer environments for the young Parents should become pastors to their children

To support the importance of respect in the life of parents and children, a modern depiction of the Prodigal Son through a movie skit was shown to the participants. VIII. RELATED LITERATURE A. Church Documents Catechism of the Catholic Church (for the United of America copyright @ Libreria Editrice Vaticana, Citta del Vaticano, 1994). Vatican II. Pastoral Constitution on the Church in the Modern World Lumen Gentium, (21 November, 1964). John Paul II. Letter to Families: Year of the Family (2 February, 1994). Makati: Pauline Publishing House, 1994. John Paul II. Apostolic Exhortation on the Role of the Christian Family in the Modern World Familiaris Consortio (22 November, 1981). Makati: Pauline Publishing House, 1981.

Catholic Bishops of the Philippines. Acts And Decrees Of The Second Plenary Council Of The Philippines (January 20 February 17, 1991). Catholic Bishops of the Philippines. Catechism for Filipino Catholics (6 March, 1997). Manila: Claretian Publications, 2007. B. Books I. Primary Source Sacred Scriptures, NAB II. Secondary Source www.Merriam-Webster.com www.youtube.com