In the last 50 years, we have seen sweeping technological advancements yet technology has done little to confront the

e problems of loneliness and emptiness. Perhaps like no other time in human existence, loneliness plagues teenagers and adults alike. The inability to make and to keep friends has become a common disease. Even among Christians, godly friendships have become a lost art. One of the first recorded sentences God ever uttered about the man whom He created was the following: "It is not good for the man to be alone" (Genesis 2:18). It is imperative that we know how to develop godly friendships. To do so, we need to look no further than our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Proverbs 18:24 tells us that "there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." Jesus is such a friend. When sin penetrated the hearts of Adam and Eve, they not only became alienated from God, but they also became alienated from each other. When Jesus died on the cross, He made it possible for all who believe in Him to be in fellowship with God and also in godly fellowship with one another. Godly friendships are the evidence of our belonging to the Lord Jesus Christ. But godly friendships are not found; they are made. They are built up stone by stone. They are established on biblical principles. A godly friendship never pivots on equal return of service or return of affection. Godly friendships move away from self and toward loved ones. Godly friends desire their friends' welfare. They find joy in the prosperity of their friends, and their sorrow is in their misfortune and grief. They enjoy doing and enduring for each other. Jesus said, "Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends" (John 15:13). Godly friendships are self-sacrificing and life-transforming. The intimacy we long for is found in Christ and expressed through godly friendships. Jesus said to his disciples, "I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you" (John 15:15). A godly friend is given information that no one else has, building precious intimacy. Godly friendships are fruit-bearing. No one in the universe wants you to reach your potential more than God and He knows your greatest potential will be expressed in your love for others. Jesus loves you unconditionally, and it is from a place of unconditional love that godly friendships are formed. The Lord Jesus Christ gave His life for us. As we grow in the qualities of a godly friend, we must keep our eyes fixed on Christ because He is the perfect model of a true friend. Do you long for godly friendships? If so, then take action. Just as God took the initiative in choosing us as His friends (see John 15:16) and in providing a way for our friendship with Him through the death and Resurrection of His Son, Jesus Christ,

godly friends take the initiative. They do not wait for the other person to need, to trust, or to love them. They step out, by faith, in love and service.

As Christians, we should love everyone and get along with everyone, but if everyone loves us it is a sign that there is something wrong with us. What? Does that make any sense in our politically correct world? Yes it does. God does not change to fit the culture. The culture, that is the world, will reject you if you walk in the Spirit. Luke 6:26 Woe unto you, when all men shall speak well of you! for so did their fathers to the false prophets. Proverbs 18:24a A man of many companions may come to ruin, 1 John 3:13 Marvel not, my brethren, if the world hate you. Too often, Christians will become close friends of the ungodly. Some marry the ungodly and bring misery for a lifetime. For this to happen, the Christian must be a hypocrite. If a Christian is not a hypocrite but truly keeps in step with the Spirit of God, then the culture, the ungodly, will reject that Christian to an extent. Any Christian who truly walks the walk of the Spirit will not fit in with the worldly, the ungodly, and that Christian will never be allowed into the inner circle of friendship. Because of the humility of Christ that is in a Christian that is called to the first resurrection, the Christian can bear the fact that they are somewhat of an outcast. They can love those who don't love them. They will show honor, be polite, be gracious, and not get into angry arguments even when the ungodly try to provoke and bring pressure. The ungodly will bring pressure because they are led by Satan. They are slaves and cannot help it. They think that they are free, but they are in bondage. Those followers of Christ who are not walking close to Jesus or who have no understanding and wisdom will begin to make concessions to fit in and reduce the pressure on themselves. Since these hypocritical Christians have already made all the concessions, they just continue to be squeezed into the mold of the world. Then, they will contend with God and argue with Him that this is not a problem. Contending with God leads to hardness of heart toward God. They just slide away from God slowly. They never can have true friends. Their ungodly fake friends would not accept them if they were to stop making all the compromises. Their ungodly friends will not make any

compromises for them--they just keep on putting gentle pressure on the hypocrite to conform more to ungodliness.l The exact opposite happens with their godly friends. They have to keep up their guard against their godly fake friends--not that their godly friends are fakes with them, but they are fake friends with the godly. They have to fake it, but they can never let out the fact that they are leading a double life. They can never feel comfortable with their godly friends though their godly friends are true friends to them. It is pride that makes a Christian seek out close friendship with unbelievers. This is especially true among teens who don't have a very close walk with God. Because they are not too close to God, they feel a need to be popular. This is like a disease among the young. Here is the problem with that: James 4:4 Ye adulterers and adulteresses, know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God? whosoever therefore will be a friend of the world is the enemy of God. There was a pastor of a denominational Christian organization that went to a picnic at a Church member's house. This pastor told off-color jokes, and the people in his organization were used to hearing him tell these types of jokes. He was trying to fit in with the ungodly in order to be popular. There are people who set themselves up as ministers of the gospel who are using vulgarity to try to bond with the ungodly who are listening. This does not come from the Spirit of Christ. There are religious leaders who are bringing rock and roll music and other forms of ungodly music into their Churches to try to bond with the ungodly. Cross-over music is another example of trying to fit into the world's mold. It is based on a fallacy. The fallacy says that by performing music that sounds like an ungodly song but actually has a double meaning because it could be interpreted religiously, that will bring people into the Church. It will not. It takes people out of the Church and it makes those Christians who listen to it remain as infants, babies in Christ. These are all doctrines of demons. This is hypocrisy, plain and simple. This is what hypocrisy looks like and smells like. It will only lead to ruin. The purity of a follower of Christ will make the ungodly feel uncomfortable regardless of how loving and nice the follower of Christ is to the ungodly person. The Holy Spirit does not let us feel comfortable when we are lot walking right. God loves us and wants us to walk in righteousness. The love of God in us does the same thing if we will allow Him to do it. He won't force you to do His will, but if you have a humble heart, you will be able to submit to the Holy Spirit and walk in righteousness.

It is important that we, as Christians love every person. We may have many acquaintances, and that is good. How else can we bring people to know Jesus. If we are not talking to people about our faith and the way that our faith affects our lives, it is probably a sign that we are trying to appear ungodly so we can fit in with the world. That is dangerous. Adults and young people fail to define themselves as followers of Christ because they want to fit in. They would never speak of their faith. They will laugh at off-color jokes, watch off-color movies, listen to ungodly types of music, try to defend ungodly music that uses some Christian words, read ungodly magazines, post ungodly posts to Face Book, and many other such things. As they fit in with the world, the culture, they no longer fit in with the Church. One of two things will then happen. They will change the Church to be the world--in which case it will no longer be the Church, or they will leave the Church. Often, people will leave a Church that is following Jesus in order to join a pseudo-church that has long ago ceased to walk in the Spirit. Gradually they walk away from God until there is nothing left of their faith. They may have a form of religion, but there is certainly no power or righteousness in it. They may start to use foul language as a way to deny Christ and seem more ungodly to their friends. Eventually, everything that is good and holy seems bad to them. They have no desire for the things of God. Only the things of the world appeal to them. That is the sad destruction of those who would be a friend of the world. There are some people who are just angry. We need to extend our love to them and try to help them but be careful not to learn their ways. Anger, fear, and sexual sins are particularly easy to fall into. We must be constantly on guard. Guard your heart from the planting of seeds of anger or any other seeds of wickedness. Proverbs 22:24 Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go: 25 "Lest thou learn his ways, and get a snare to thy soul." Proverbs 22:24 Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered, 25 or you may learn their ways and get yourself ensnared. You know how easily you can learn the ways of anger. Anger makes you stupid. Anger makes you say and do things that make no sense. It is very difficult of an angry person to leave his or her angry ways, and anger is extremely contagious. Look out!