Dear

Rich, Mark Salzman's account of his experience working with young prisoners certainly caught and kept my attention. It deeply moved me especially with the thread of societal gender roles and the often negative results of these roles continually reaching out and pulling me in. We talked about these gender roles a little bit in class, and I hope to highlight some of the points I was making to you now that you have finished reading the book. One of the first things I noticed concerning gender in this book was the way the writing students seem to view females. The way they talk about the opposite sex is almost entirely based on sexual intercourse. The boys tend to objectify their female counterparts often negatively and disrespectfully. For example, one boy writes entirely about women physically in one of his pieces. My x and a girl I was fucen with big titties was talken the hol tyme. My x was salting me up. That whole day. But in the end I stell got my pussy so I did not give a fuc (221). When discussing females, the boys tend to only discuss the sex they get from females. It is even admitted by one of the writing students that love from a woman is not valued very highly, while male to male bonds are much more idealized: Love from a female is cool an all, but a female can change her mind. Homie love is for life (164). Furthermore, many of the boys admit to their writing teachers that they have never had serious conversations with women, and the girls admit they notice. Duane, the writing teacher that suggested this opportunity to Mark, explains, Most of the boys in my class say theyve never had a serious conversation with a girl. And the girls feel that boys have never listened to them, never taken them seriously as people (119). This statement summarizes the objectification of women by the boys, and their inexperience of treating women as fellow human beings. Mark and other adults certainly notice the negative perception these young men have of women. For the writing class retreat, a main concern is that the boys and girls will not be able to be together because they will just try and have sex. This is expected to be the extent of the interaction between men and women. However, this is not the case at all as Mark notices that it to ends up being more like a middle school dance where everyone is shy and the opposite sexes avoid each other even when given the opportunity to sit together. The enthusiasts for the convention see it as a way for men and women to break down these stereotypes. They want them to interact and have real conversations with each other. The retreat does not end up providing a striking experience of this, but at the very least, they are able to share with each other serious writing pieces in a respectful manner. The highly gender specific roles of the parents in these young accused criminals lives is also central to the story. What was most interesting was how much love and respect the young men seem to have for their mothers despite their lack of respect for other females. Many of them often thought, wrote and even talked about how much they loved and missed their mothers. One of the boys, Francisco writes a quite a heartfelt letter to his mother. He describes how much he respects and listens to his

mom has to say. He explains to her, I love you more than anybody in this world and I think that there isnt no better mom than you (96). Several of the boys write similar heartfelt pieces to or about their mothers that show high levels of respect for these female figures in their lives. When Mark asks them to write about their fathers, some still choose to discuss their mothers. When Mark plays his cello for a group of the inmates, he tells them that the song makes him think of his mother. As he plays he hears a rustling in the audience, I [Mark] glanced at the audience and saw a roomful of boys with tears running down their faces. The rustling that had distracted me [him] was the sound of sniffling and nose-wiping music to any musicians ears (124). This transforms a potentially boring classical cello performance into a highly emotional and moving experience: [] it was the invocation of motherhood, not my [his] playing, that had moved the inmates so deeply (124). Despite these boys negative, objectifying and stereotypical opinions towards women in general, a huge exception is made when the woman is their mother. Instead of disrespect, their mothers seem to epitomize respect and honor for them. Their fathers on the other hand seemed to be darker subjects, more ambiguous, and certainly more troubled. Unlike many of the boys crediting much of their life to their mothers, their fathers seemed to serve as catalyzers to their bad behavior. Also, when Mark suggests the boys write about their fathers there seems to be a lot of discomfort: Fathers seem to play a central role as either violent or simply missing. Without positive male figures in their lives, these boys claim to not be able to cope. One boy writes, So by not having a fatherly figure,/ I turned to the streets/ And learned how to pull a trigger (299). Another gender role the boys often identify with is that as men, they feel unable or incapable of expressing their emotions openly. One of the boys explains that he has a split personality because he must hide his emotions. Over and over again, the boys discuss their feelings of sadness and how they all cry but no one ever talks about crying. Many describe this in a way of having a split personality or two-faces: Because people might think you are weak and might mess with you, in my own time I sit in my room and Im a real sentimental person, but once its time for me to go out of my room I go back to my second face (203). One boy describes his inability to hug his roommate, his friend once he leaves. This is unsettling to him because he can only guess how much worse his expressiveness will be after several more years in prison. Many of the boys also recognize the problems that keeping all of their emotions inside have caused them. By holding in their sadness, it simply manifests itself into anger as one of the boys describes, [] all the feelings I had, they got turned into just one. Anger! (109). This anger then leads them to make bad decisions that ultimately land them into gangs, violence and even jail. Notably, even Mark can relate to this as he references his own inability to hug one of his student writers during their goodbye: What should have been a tender farewell became, instead, a reminder of male awkwardness (209). This moves this problem beyond just that of criminals and shows it as a societal and cultural concern rather than only

a countercultural one. One student, Toa, writes a piece about his mother that seems to summarize this complex role of gender in these boys lives. He discusses his mother being the foundation of his family after his father was put in jail. He depicts his mother in a loving way but strikingly juxtaposes this with his own violent nature: My moms kind, sensitive, loving, and if you take all that as a sign of weakness fuck you cause I aint nothin like that and shes my heart so killing you secures somebody I love and thats how much I love her, that Ill kill without remorse. Even though she dont like what I do, my moms my world. I love her. (304). This troubling piece shows a young boy without a father who has a positive adult figure in his life who he respects, his mother, but turns to violence nonetheless. These students view of women paradoxically as objects and as role models reveals a complex situation. Furthermore, the inability for many of them to feel emotionally connected with their fathers and to be openly emotional beings seems to add to their struggles and many blame these things on the sources or roots of their current issues. Rich, I see this as one example of the limiting gender roles of our society manifesting to cause hurt and turmoil in these boys lives. With Love, Chira Husky