THE FAIRLY ODDPARENTS

“The Fairly OddParents Musical”

SONGS

ALL SONGS WRITTEN BY:

Butch Hartman and Steve Marmel

Nickelodeon Animation Studio

© 2003 Viacom International Inc.
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KIDS JUST BEING KIDS!

Bell rings.
School’s done.
Time for eight weeks of fun and sun!

No shirts!
No shoes!
Beating kids up any time that I choose!

The beach! The mall!

Family visits to the Taj Mahal!

We’re doing all the things

our parents forbid!
Summer’s not a bummer
with kids just being kids!

COSMO: It’s time! It’s here!

My very favorite time of year!
WANDA: No school! Just play!
Granting wishes 24 hours a day!

TIMMY: Are you sure?

This is allowed?
SANDERSON (slyly): Make your wishes very violent and loud!
Grant me wishes
you would usually forbid!
Cuz summer’s not a bummer
when us kids are being kids!

Kids just being kids!

Running wild and running free!
Kids just being kids!
What can I TP?
Kids just being kids!
MOM AND DAD: Close your eyes and count to three.
There’s nowhere safe for you and me
with kids just being kids!
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ADULTS:
My house! My yard!
What’s these charges on my credit card?
My porch! My word!
CROCKER: It’s not my problem ‘til September Third!
My town! My chow!
I hadn’t realized ‘til up ‘til now!
They can do those things we parents forbid!
They’ll kill themselves this summer
Cuz these kids are being kids!

Kids just being kids!

Breaking things and wrecking stuff!
Kids just being kids!
When’s enough enough!
Of Kids just being kids,
Taking risks, we must act tough!
And save our kids from all the stuff...
...of kids just being kids!
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WE’RE PIXIES!
We’re Pixies! We’re Pixies!
Check out our mad, wicked Mixies!
We’ve got square heads!
Big pointy caps!
Clean out your ears and hear our rap!

H.P.:
I’m H.P., yo! I am in charge!
I may be small, but my goals are large!
I’m not a hater,
but I must cater,
to my mission, my ambition,
to be dictator!

SANDERSON:
I’m Sanderson!
I’m Anti-fun!
And all those Fairies can bite my bun!
With my boss H.P.,
we’re gonna be,
the new leaders of the Fairies!

H.P.:
You got that, G!

FLAPPY BOB:
I’m Flappy Bob!
I ain’t no clown!
Oh, wait... My shoes...
Hey, I am a clown!
A clown that raps!
A Bob that flaps!
Gonna get Timmy Turner
in a clown-based trap!
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ALL THREE:
With Pixies! Yeah Pixies!

SANDERSON AND H.P.:

And since the 1960s!
We’ve tried to rule,
and here’s the deal,
by this time tomorrow
the world will kneel...

ALL THREE:
TO PIXIES!
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GET FLAPPY!
FLAPPY BOB:
You’re sitting here complaining!
‘Bout all that you’ve been through.
And with the whole summer remainng,
you must be asking “Who?”

Can protect your little darlings

from the bad things you abhor.
Let me tell you Flappy Bob is,
the clown you’re looking for!

Before they skin their knees! Get Flappy!

Before they’re black and blue! Get Flappy!
Before they’ve caught TB! Get Flappy!
Or keep annoying you!

Before they break their necks! Get Flappy!

Before they break their arms! Before they’re all but wrecks, Get Flappy!
Before they do more harm!

CLOWN CHEERLEADERS:
(cheered)
Flap flap flap flap flappity doo!
Flappy is the clown for you!
Flap flap flap flap flappity dee!
Flappy is the clown for me!
Flap flap flappity doo!
Flap Flappity doh!
Flappy is the way to go!

FLAPPY BOB:
Before they poke their eyes out!
Before they break their knees!
Before your home’s invaded by
a swarm of angry bees!
Why sit here just complaining!
Why even take the chance!
Drop your punks off to your buddy
with the Polka-Dotta pants!
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I know that it seems harsh!

And a little bit unfair!
But someone’s gotta be there
when you know you can’t be there!

It might be a tad expensive!

But let me ask of you!
Won’t it cost more down the line...
If the cops are blaming you!
For the injuries incurred while
your children wreck the town!
You can learn to love your cell mate,

Get Flappy!

FLAPPY BOB AND ADULTS:

Get Flappy…

ALL ADULTS:
GET FLAPPY!!!
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ADULTS RUIN EVERYTHING

TIMMY:
Who shuts the mall down early?
Who wants us in by dark?
Who gets all mad and surly... ...
when we make a smart remark?

Who do we have to hide from?

From Dimmsdale to old Beijing?
They’re taking away our summer
‘cuz adults ruin everything!

Adults ruin everything!

With all their rules and laws!
Adults ruin everything!
We must fight back because!
Adults ruin everything!
Time and time again!
Adults ruin everything!
Trust no one over ten!

CHESTER: I’d feed the whole world ice cream!

Veronica: I’d super size the mall!
AJ: I’d melt stuff with a heat beam!
H.P. (to Timmy) Too bad it’s not your call.

TIMMY: I’ve got two magic Fairies!

COSMO AND WANDA Wands waiting to be twirled!
TIMMY: Adults can’t ruin everything
if kids could rule the world!

Adults ruin everything!

But kids would run things right!
Adults ruin everything,
but I know I can fight!
Adults ruining everything!
That’s how this day unfurled!
But that won’t happen if I wish
that kids could rule the world!
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(Eight Bars musical interlude as the world changes)

Who gets to set the curfews? KIDS!

Who gets to make the laws? KIDS!
The only adult we listen to
And his name is Santa Claus!
Who gets to run the country? KIDS!
Who gets to say what’s cool? KIDS!
How can I put it bluntly?
‘Cuz Now It’s kids who rule!
KIDS!
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KIDS RULE THE WORLD!

That kids had no power,
I had to correct.
We kids are the boss now,
and you can expect, that
things’ll be different
with me at the wheel!
I’m ten and in charge, Wow!
And here’s what I feel...

I made a place that the kids now are running!

The view from our tree house is really quite stunning!
H.P.: Our plan. Look. It’s working.
SANDERSON: We’re really quite cunning.
H.P.: To Jorgen Von Strangle we go.
SANDERSON: Nice hat!

It’s candy for breakfast, more candy for lunch

and it’s candy for dinner and I’ve got a hunch
that it’s dandy we run things, don’t act like a mob!
There’s plenty to do and you’ve all got a job!

You get to be the police chief!

Can I flash the big red light?
You three can host all the talk shows!
And stay up late every night!
You get to lead all my armies!
All over the map!
You clean my room up
and you do my laundry
...while I stay here and nap!

Note: We’re in Fairyworld… The Pixies are pointing all this out to Jorgen

We’re Pixies! We’re Pixies!

Check out our mad wicked mixies!
Have you checked out the planet?
I know you didn’t plan it!
But the kids have the power and the Fairies!
JORGEN: “DAGNABBIT!”
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We’re Pixies! We’re Pixies!

And we’re about to affix these!
Notes of Eviction!
JORGEN: Earth is my jurisdiction!
The power balance needs a’ fixin’
like our magical prediction!

(Note: We hear “We’re Pixies! We’re Pixies! Check out our mad wicked mixies!”
Beneath the last two verses of this song.)

WANDA: Wow, things are running quite smoothly!

With kids there are no wars!
COSMO: I don’t know if it’s that groovy,
that we’re stuck with the chores!
How can you be dissaproving,
this gets better by the hour!
No worries, no strife,
Baby, this is the life!!!!

JORGEN: You have too much power!

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THE JORGEN VON STRANGLE POLKA

With my muscles!
I will tussles!
With all those who dare present-sles!
A clear and present threat-sles
to my authority!

To my knuckles!
You will buckles!
Like a chicken you will cluck-sles!
For I so do love Da Rules-les
and I know “Da Rules” love me!

You will learn to fear my mighty fist!

If my song won’t help you get the gist!
You fools might disagree!
But you all answer to me!

With this Polka!

I won’t joke-a!
But first, this frappe mocha! (mmm!)
I was shocked when I awoke-a!
To a world where kids all ruled!

With my bi-ceps!
I must try-cepts!
To see that kids are now denied-ceps!
The magic we supplied-cepts!
For your jobs must be retooled!

Oh I love to get to draw a line!

And you morons make me all the time!
For “Da Rules” are very clear!
And now the time is here!
For me to...
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Pull back the Fairies!

Bring them all home one by one!
Pull back the Fairies!
Now that my mocha is done!
Pull back the Fairies!
Now that the kids have the reigns!
Now we’re pulling, pulling back the Fairies!
So I can bring them pain!

(key change)

Pull back the Fairies!

Bring them all home one by one!
Pull back the Fairies!
While I eat this big sticky bun!
Pull back the Fairies!
Now that the kids have the reigns!
Now we’re pulling, pulling back the Fairies!
So I can bring them pain!
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UNFUNDAMENTALS
Oh, I’m a clown face
on the outside
but a frown face
on the inside
‘Cuz this town here
where I reside
needs a new reality!

Not one that

all the kids run
not one where
there’s too much fun
but one which
is my vision
of the way the world should be!

These are the…

Un-Fundamentals!
Loved by
all the parentals!
Who want to
keep all their kids
in line!
I'm certi
-fiably demental
for the
Unfundamentals!
I’m gonna
childsafe the world,
just give me time!

And make this place

unfundamentally mine!

Can I wear these cleats?

Well now you can!
May I have more meat?
Here's tofu, man!
How about a treat?
You'd better scram!
I’m afraid that I
will have to slam...
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The door in the face of

any trace of
any fun that
might deface my
clownish scheme to
Interlace Un
Fundamentals of life!

All the arcades

close at three now!
Trampolines are
bouncy free now!
We all have
to agree now…
…that your kids are
safe and sound!

Since the corners

now are cork-ed!
And the forks have
been deforked, now
you can all go
to New York while
your kids I am around!

due to the
…Unfundamentals
I'll be
so very gentle.
There's no
Accident-a-mentals
or Strife!

Just trust my
unfundamentals!
While you’re
transcontinental!
Just leave your
precious children's hands in mine!
As I make this very town
and make the world renowned
and make all that's fun
Unfundamentally mine!
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FLOATING WITH YOU

WANDA (Sings as Jorgen takes notes, then we ripple to flashbacks)
I was lost
Then he found me
And all tho
He confounds me
By his crown
Is where I know
I should be.

Yes, I know
…He’s a moron
With a brain
Made of Boron.
And yet I find
I’m drawn to him
magically!

And through every moment of turmoil

And moment of pain
And all of our misadventures,
one thing remains…
Facing Pixies, Jarheads or Bullies
I’ll never be blue…
As long as I’m
floating with you.

COSMO (Sings as Jorgen takes notes, then we ripple to flashbacks)

I saw her…
And no other
…I still lived
With my Mother
When I spotted her and
her swirly pink hair!

Though my shoes
Smell like tarpits
And I don’t
Wash my armpits
I like monkeys too much,
but I know she
doesn’t care!
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I know that I ‘m forgetful

I know I’m dim!
And despite the fact I’ve just eaten,
I know I’ll swim!
But I know that it doesn’t matter
I can’t count to two
As long as I’m
Floating with you.

Montage to a Fairy Court – Cosmo and Wanda face a Judge and Jury. Key change.

COSMO AND WANDA (Harmonizing)

Even though
we’re in deep here,
And they might
make us sleep here,
Here with you, dear, is
where we both make our stand.

WANDA: I am braced for Attack and

COSMO: Knowing she has my back and
BOTH: All I need is her (his) hand
in my hand…

WANDA: Baby I know I can be nagging!

COSMO: I know you’re naggy too!
WANDA: I know that I’m demanding!
COSMO: Man is that’s true!

COSMO: But maybe I’m understanding!

BOTH: No matter what we go through.
COSMO: I’d rather go through it…
WANDA: I know I’ll get through it…
BOTH: If I’m floating through it…
With you.
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GET FLAPPY (REPRISE)

(To The Tune of Get Flappy)
You thought that I was Flappy!
But Flappy isn’t real!
You thought you were in charge here,
but this is now the deal!

I’m Imaginary Gary

I’m Timmy Turner’s real foe!
He thought me gone,
but he was wrong
And here’s how things will go!

Before we get set free?

Get Timmy!
And once he’s Sad and Blue?
Get Timmy!
You’ll switch him and me!
Get Timmy!
Or I will clobber you!
He locked me in his head!
And never played with me!
But mark my words,
you tiny birds,
his butt belongs to me!

To the Tune of “Floating With You”

I know Timmy’s in trouble!
Gary wants Timmy Dead!
But I by swear by all of these birdies
Up in my head!

That I can make this all better!

If Timmy is free!
And he’ll bring back
Wanda to me!

To The Tune of “Adults Ruin Everything.”

Why are we in this dungeon?
Stuck in this pit of balls?
Wasting our precious summer
surrounded by these walls?
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How can I start to tell them?

That I put them in this vault!
COSMO: Timmy, you’ve got to listen!
It’s really not your fault!

Gary ruined everything!

Wait?! Flappy was a fake?!?
Yes! Gary ruined everything!
And you’re next on his plate!
Gary’s ruined everything!
And I think you must agree!
He’ll off you and your friends
if can’t set those Pixies Free!

Cosmo POOFS into a KEY.

Timmy uses him to open his cell door and frees everybody.

ALL KIDS: WE’RE FREE!!!