It feels like; a really nice morning has come out to greet all Universes--very

beautiful and what feels as if a natural speed of a marvel called life and its
living can
be observed here at the Wat Nongbua. Their will be more likely than not some
absolutely super-nice people surrounding you. So the whole day is filled with this
tremendous good energy from all around you.
No question (speaking almost third-person like) that traveling over to Thailand is
a
most wonderful birthday present. The word “Happy Birthday” was imbued with the
flying/living in Thai culture experience. (I had arrived at the Bangkok
Suvarnabhoomi
airport on my thirty sixth birth-day.) I’m certainly, happy to be back here. This
has
happened almost three decades after my family had checked it out here. I must
thank
both my parents profusely for bringing me closer to this culture (deeply
influenced by
ancient Hindu methodologies). I am almost ready to get something of a bigger
surprise as it gets closer to my ordaining as a monk in the Theravada tradition. I
will
get a change of name—to a new Buddhistic type. This could get equally enchanting?
as my journey that’s up and coming for the next half year (from this point on). I
hope
to be able to contribute towards, towards an initial goal of teaching monks to
speak
better English. It feels like, with each passing day--I make newer friends and
greater
bonding seems to be out everywhere. I have a systematic and real understanding on
how deeply I wanted to become a monk. But when the cooler waters of monkshood
will be tested by the heat of the moments that are going to un-erringly happen (to
me)—simply due to my advanced age of ordaining- I hope to be able to ride them
out.
Was it a good idea to be in and around the language of the Buddhist calendar
adhering
Thailand? For goodness’ sake, a BIG- Yes, I’d say!
I feel safe and almost secure. It can be amazing as some of the impressions of
your
own people you can bring into precise and concise gatherings such as conferences.
I
have no doubt that all the people of Thailand support me in my quest as a post-
Ambedkarite
(Buddhist). (For those who want to know-B.R. Ambedkar, PhD, died in
India and has a global following for his legacy of re-establishing Buddhism in its
land
of origin. Inspired by his name all his followers are often referred to as
Ambedkarite(s)). Knowing full well that my stay (like, many others who have been
on
their quest of monk-hood) would not benefit Thailand in any material respect, and
yet
Thai people have had still given (every outsider) as a culture. Thai people keep
giving
(sramaneras, novices and monks) with a deep heart filled with heart-felt
appreciation
and faith in their Lordly Buddha (as my Buddha and yours too!). I have never seen
anything quite as deep-faith like as is seen here in Surin city. Surin lies
towards the
east of Thailand. It is very close to Thailand’s border with Cambodia and about 6
hours away from Laos. Here people speak Thai, Khmer, Lao and Thai languages. This
has to be an extremely diverse group just from looking at these linguistically
(and
culturally) plural manners of existing.
Things that were from my heart and also in its immense love towards my late
father’s
legacy as an Ambedkarite and then all the way up to my dear mother’s immensely
deep respect towards (Babasaheb) Ambedkar, have brought me to look at my own
responsibility—towards returning to my family, with a learning of Vinaya and as a
better man (if not as a monk).
In the past days, I have come to raise with Roeng- about the duration during which
time, I get conferred the honor of monk-hood and things are almost settled, at the
(this) moment. Dr. Roeng’s insistence on getting monkshood ceremonial matters
fixed
was apparent and very quicksilver and earnest (Giving you an insight into his
lifestyle-functioning as a monk and a man). I got to thank him deeply for his
efforts
and consistent guidance. I believe, when in my time of need- any more guidance
will
always be there, at least from monk Roeng. Roeng’s very busy, with some of the
administrative responsibilities as well as working responsibilities of Surin
province’s
younger Sangha. This must be truly a big honor for someone like him. I hope to be
able to assist him as much and as long as is possible for me to stay in Thailand.
Today, I give myself a good month to live around here at the Wat Nongbua. Then
having finished my working responsibility of monkshood, I want to travel thru
Thailand. Today, as things are standing I do have the additional sponsorship to
cover
my expenses. I am deeply grateful towards Phra Dhammamoulei for this most
wonderful gift. He straddles the earth like a teacher, a guru- a support system to
all
future monks like, yours truly. Since the morning of May 9th, I’ve had traveled
from
temple to temple (Wat to Wat) and now in the evening, I do feel quite tired and am
ready to call it a day from the exhaustion.
These might just be the most eventful ten days of my life! Everything is aligning
for
me to say Namo Buddha (To almost all people from Thailand). I am feeling quite
satisfied with my friendships (globally) and all my friends’ deeper trust in me. I
have
just made some friendly inroads into the working friendships of the people at the
wAt.
I am quite happy to be able to teach them whatever little English I am capable of
teaching as a second language. This improves my chances of staying on here,
slightly.
On May 11, 2009 we have a good vibe from Ti, Non and Tem (from this morning’s
interactivity). Yesterday, as well we had a lot of fun. We had a pretty full day.
The
Wat’s consecration ceremony (over at Wat Sri Ratna ram in the outskirts of the
city)
was filled once again with super chanting from all these experienced monks and was
something to keep you wondering. I also, remember that during the morning Ben and
Fon also show real promise as a good double team ESL(earner). It’s another day and
another tiring body experience. I have not been teaching English in the past
thirty plus
hours. This will make my last lesson to the men and monks already pretty long ago.
As things are
I want to, at this point-quickly finish out the pre-ordained, if a somewhat pre-
determined
reality. Anyway you sound- it will take a very characteristic Buddha
nature to finish a day in a grateful spirit of the heart-mind. I hope that this be
attained,
and the sooner the better. Let me thank Sister Yeshe’s young and inspiring
presence
in our lives. Wherever she goes may she always find her happiness. Thank her
goodness.
I will steer for a bit--away from the topic to a newer one. Let’s say: (for
argument’s
sake) all the Islamic Jihadists became Buddhists; then what would such an event
bring
as a sum quantum of total religiosity towards the world? I believe such a good
idea
does exist, somewhere in the deep and utter confines of all the universes. The
universe
within is the one that the Buddha conquest-ed and definitely conquered. But how
was
this conquering of the human condition? Was it simply an abstract ideal and once
in a
life-time phenomena (for all other human beings’ lives)? Or was it something that
each one of the peoples could again bring within their genetic codes as an
ancestor of
the great Shakyamuni? I’d have to say the later of the two possibilities appeals
to me.
The fruition of his labor plus the superhuman exertions of meditation(s) that you
can
only but imagine—he went through for sure. This is why when you look at the
Buddha face, it instantly reminds of peace. This expectation could probably be met
even if a visually challenged person contoured the face of a Buddha statue with
their
hands. The peace was not bought, it was not sought—it just came after the hardest
work imaginable. Most of us would be tempted to break out and shout “oh! Lord”,
but
it’s also the actions that you have to put in. Your actions are probably the one
guarantor of your becoming a Buddha. No amount of speaking words can match the
actual reality of your action to go forth towards becoming the next Buddha. A
century
of Buddhistic upswing is probably what lies ahead of all us-the samsaric people.
People from the west and the traditional east are now looking at the optimism of
the
Buddha, as opposed to the linked topic of death that will always be present
therein,
intrinsically speaking. This gives them a better handle on picking up and
sometimes
studying books and meditating on their own to better understand the (western-
imbued)
dogma from the reality Buddha nature. Had it been that there were no books,
I don’t presume to have learned all that much from my eastern Indian (Buddhist-
atheist)
parents. It took a lot of learning personally, to begin to call myself a Buddhist.
The reasons, I’ll go into detail within a complex web of challenging, birth-
related
factors. Firstly, I am of Indian blood, to be precise, I am Desi. When you
describe
yourself, as a Desi—it means just an Eastern Indian blood. My family took care of
the
aspect of never forgetting our roots. I was raised in an Indian household for
close to
two decades. As a dependent of my family for all my cultural bearings and such
things, I was never really interested in Buddhist study. In the city of Nagpur, I
had
many Indian Buddhists to go form closer friendships and study the language of
Pali.
But this never happened to be on my mind. It seems that somewhere during my teens,
I lost my way as a happy, well-adjusted kid (read: son) of my parents. That’s the
subject of a whole entire book, so I’ll leave it for another day. But in any case,
my
declining life within the family structure and my increased anger and frustration
were
never truly addressed by me. Later on, when I went back to my birth country of the
U.S (Fayetteville, AR.), these emotions (negative kind) came back to haunt me. I
think, having learned about the caste-basis of India, I got somewhere down the
lines
very deeply resentful towards all of India. I thought that if my Buddhism (which
is
based in conversion from a caste (Hindu)-to Buddhism) was underweighted by Indian
culture and society, then we don’t need each other. So, I had become Mr.
Untouchable. I had very low self-esteem, even to forge newer friendships. The
people
of America, somehow always loved me through my struggling period from inside and
starting within my own roots. I met and made so many friends that were American.
But, I kept on being an angry young man of an ex-untouchable caste. This led to a
lot
of internal self-resentment that never got healed or even expressed. I feel this
is the
period of change within my spiritual life. I started reading about the Buddha. I
started
getting led to read/practice more and more. I became a late starter in my life as
a
Buddhist. But, it does not really matter, as long as you keep hacking at the code!
So
anyway, that’s it for the day. It is raining here in Surin city (Thailand). The
monsoon
is very tricky and sometimes even unpredictably intermittent showers are known to
come down (all over Thailand). This is my closing paragraph for the evening on May
13, 2009.
There is an early start to the morning of the 14
P
th
P
May. I have become ready. This
ready-steady and become monk! Wow! I don’t really know what to expect. But I am
trying to learn here in the Thai tradition. It is really important to do that,
since in India.

there’s no real tradition worth going to. Therefore in your quest of the reality
of
learning from tradition’s growth and ambient environment you must go find the one
that suits you. Let’s see how many days of this can be worked out. At this point,
I’m
playing things and newer monkshood experiences by the ear. And have informed my
bhikshu friend as this to be the case. I am now officially a monk. This happened
in a
huge big ceremony for bhikshu-initiates. We are all now, with names. These names
are Pali ones. My new Buddhist (imprint) name is KantHeyverro (Thai as well as
Pali
based, linguistically). This will translate as: the brave one. We here at this
Wat, would
hope to be able to live up to this new name. Let’s just say, I hope to live up to
become
a better (human) Buddhist—with every passing day. I find myself quietly living up
to
my target. I hope to learn to enough to get closer to Vinaya, with every passing
day.
In any case, it will be good for all. But mostly it is the good that can be
attained from
within for your self. It is a very simple definitive stance taken towards nirvana.
So
bowing to the seeker of nirvana here in Thailand, I will sign off on the evening
of
May 14, 2009.
Just now, after playing with a feline, I got interested to observe samasara. I
have
wondered, if in each one of us the cat and dog fight from one end to the circular
other
end is what we call as a samsara? So if you are a cat, you can safely cling on to
your
hopes and aspirations on your end of the circle and if you’re a dog then you
migrate to
the other end of the circle, living with the non-catty style of living. I wonder
if this
analogy could ever do justice to the great canonical theses that have been
produced in
the Dhamma-pada.