Posted by expression on 07-31-1009 04:16 PM: A brief review of all cases the village court has handled thus

far: In response to MYEs request Case 001: The Case of the Arranged Marriage What happened: Yan sued Yewman for calling her lo por zai (= wifey) against her will. Verdict: Single-sided arranged marriage ineffective. Notes: Yewman showed deep grievance on the verdict Case 002: The Case of Spams What happened: Jenny asked for a way to stop the spamming Verdict: The grey area theory Notes: Pipi le Pew voiced concern about the representation of all sides involved. Case 003: The Case of Verdict What happened: Glidingfox asked whether it is morally wrong for a juror to render a nasty defendant guilty of a crime he probably has not committed. Verdict: a bit more in-depth analysis, pls. read full verdict Case X: The plan to get Spcnats pic What happened: Mike Lau & MYE on how to by-pass the 50 pic rule. Verdict: Everyone approved of MYEs plan Z continued on next post... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 07-31-1009 04:18 PM: A brief review of all cases the village court has handled thus far: Case 004 & 007: The Case of Sir Os love pursuit & The Case of Somebody's Fantasy What happened: Sir Orange asked whether its possible for spcnat to resist his charm Verdict: some sound court-counselling by Judge Exp Notes: Orange shared his fantasy on p6-7 (case 007) Case 005: The Case of the Solo Deliverer What happened: H-Solo sued Yan & Moogles for their breach of contract of employment Verdict: Long one. Pls read on p5 Case 006: The Case of the Patty Guy What happened: H Solomon representing Eeeyore, sued Mike Lau for patting (harassment) Verdict: Harassment as an offence does not apply to donkeys and cars. Eeeyore appealed. Mike Lau punished. Notes: H-Solo is the new hottest guy on Spcnat. Eeeyore very satisfied with her attorney. Mike patted H-Solo. Orange attempted to pat Eeeyore. Side Case: Pocket seek advice on how to bleach his shirts. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Dwilight on 07-31-1009 05:45 PM: Interesting cases you've got your Honor. Any in particular you find quite challenge (rather a hand full)?

LOL, what's the deal with me being "on-call pretty (keyword) therapist? If this was meant as a compliment, I'll be happily accepting that (although I can misinterpreted what Miss Exp was trying to direct ) I'll be courtesy and given the benefit of the doubt(favor)on behalf of you, your honor, first trip to see me would be consider as free of charge(I do expect some kind of perks here LOL) But, I must warn everyone, "free" considering I can decline at anytime due to my schedule. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 07-31-1009 06:02 PM: Oh Mike is getting a big headache reading all that... please stop it with this torture. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Editor: Aye Mikey, you may not realize that this courtroom is part of the Online Continuing Education campaign launched on Spcnat.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Honey on 07-31-1009 06:46 PM: quote: Originally posted by pocket Nope. Like Honey said, I am a real baka (fool). shoot. But thank you anyway. yo MAN! waddup!!!! where have you been?? ... hmm, if you try bleach too much..... I think it will make the stuff turn yellow...... *ponders* -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by MYE on 07-31-1009 07:10 PM: quote: Judge Expression: Mr. MYE, would you kindly act as our accountant, benefits-lobbyist, and costume-designer? For free of course? Sticky Message on Judge E's Laptop Screen: Hmm.. I would be a great honor Judge E, but I need some goons for the sole purpose of threatening people to pay and... enough money for a plentiful supply of jackboots Working for free... hmm... yes.... I suppose. ok, I'll take the job your honor. Also will Miss Freaky Lips and Chief Executioner Express be related to my bureau? as some people may need softening up.... (or are they just metaphysical ideals abstracted from your honarable's one self? ) 'Let justice be done, though the heavens fall' Signed, MYE -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by goddessofvalour on 07-31-1009 07:27 PM: quote: Originally posted by expression Miss goddess, the "Servants of the law of Spcnat" I know of:

Hmmm....who sounds like a good teacher for me? Hmmm and who wants me as their student? I'm very good -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Han Solomon on 07-31-1009 11:05 PM: quote: Originally posted by Mike Lau How about sue yourself for stealing a copyrighted name like "Han Solomon"? That would create unnecessary precedent for this court. We can't have you for example to punish yourself for your sins, no sir, we cannot. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Han Solomon on 07-31-1009 11:06 PM: quote: Originally posted by eeeyore Han, why quit? c'mon you my counsellor! Trust me, I'll be there defending you when the need will arise. I'll be back, Hasta la vista. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 07-31-1009 11:07 PM: quote: Originally posted by Han Solomon That would create unnecessary precedent for this court. We can't have you for example to punish yourself for your sins, no sir, we cannot. Ok fine I'll sue YOU then! Mike Lau hereby sues Han Solomon for stealing such an honorable name from Star Wars. Had he picked Chewbaca I would have ignored it, but to steal Han Solomon, now that is low! Wow that rhymes too! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Han Solomon on 07-31-1009 11:15 PM: quote: Originally posted by Mike Lau Ok fine I'll sue YOU then! Mike Lau hereby sues Han Solomon for stealing such an honorable name from Star Wars. Had he picked Chewbaca I would have ignored it, but to steal Han Solomon, now that is low! Wow that rhymes too! someone here is so proud of their rhyme. May i remind you sir, that there's no crime in using the name Han Solomon so long there's no profit intended. Moreover it is the burden of the plaintiff to prove the case against the defendant before such case can be pursued in Judge E's court-room. In fact, only the copyright/trademark registered owner can pursue such action. Therefore, A summary dismissal of this case is sought. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Han Solomon on 07-31-1009 11:19 PM:

quote: Originally posted by expression You are still our valued Executive Orange Basher Sir! Of course if you are too busy with your current research on cardiovascular pharmacology, the village court respect and support the pursuit of science. Just hope that you did not judge me by that paper that i posted on this thread, i had an awful time with that study, finished the whole thing in less than 2 months. I then went off for holiday, with a draft ready, thinking that one of the guys would finish it and submit it before i got back. When i got back from a 2 month holiday, the thing has not yet been polished yet, and i had to prepare for my thesis and conference, so 3 months passed before anything was done. And by that time, on the very same day that i submitted my paper, another similar study was published in the same journal. So i had to settle for the current crap journal. Really down on scientific publishing. And the study was fourth rate as well. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Editor: You mean SCOOPED? Aye, as a fellow researcher, I completely understand...

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 07-31-1009 11:58 PM: quote: Originally posted by Han Solomon someone here is so proud of their rhyme. May i remind you sir, that there's no crime in using the name Han Solomon so long there's no profit intended. Moreover it is the burden of the plaintiff to prove the case against the defendant before such case can be pursued in Judge E's court-room. In fact, only the copyright/trademark registered owner can pursue such action. Therefore, A summary dismissal of this case is sought. I AM Han Solomon! Bow down you imposter you! The lawsuit stands. Your motion is denied! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Han Solomon on 08-01-1009 12:21 AM: quote: Originally posted by Mike Lau I AM Han Solomon! Bow down you imposter you! The lawsuit stands. Your motion is denied! Go home and take some pills pls Mike Lau, your split personality disorders are no longer under control. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Editor:

Wow! Do I see neuronal synapses firing between these two fine gentlemen here?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Jenny on 08-01-1009 12:29 AM: Just a heads-up. Creating unwarranted ruckus in the court of Judge E will result in a fine (amount decided at the judge's discretion) and no dining at Y & M for two weeks .

Han Solomon, would suggest you and Mike slug it out elsewhere before you bring it to Judge E's attention

(Editor *eating popcorn*: Munch... Thanks Jenny... munch... always appro...munch... priate...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Han Solomon on 08-01-1009 12:33 AM:

I think that Mike Lau and I are responsible adults who's just enjoying ourselves at the expense of each other. (I hope he is, because i am). -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 08-01-1009 12:34 AM: quote: Originally posted by Jenny Just a heads-up. Creating unwarranted ruckus in the court of Judge E will result in a fine (amount decided at the judge's discretion) and no dining at Y & M for two weeks . Han Solomon, would suggest you and Mike slug it out elsewhere before you bring it to Judge E's attention Yeah you tell him! In the meantime the lawsuit STANDS! Eat that! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Han Solomon on 08-01-1009 12:36 AM: Any evidence from your side, Mike? Otherwise deposition is going real fast here. and we all know who is going to win. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 08-01-1009 12:51 AM: Evidence is right there next to your avatar. Tada!

(Editor: Did he mean the username??

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Check on 08-01-1009 05:05 AM: I am so hungry.

( Hungry? Wait no more! Spcnet Cafe open 24 hours a day!! *paid advertisement*)
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Honey on 08-01-1009 07:19 AM: awwww. jie jie! want some cheesecake -------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Posted by expression on 08-01-1009 11:15 AM: quote: Originally posted by Dwilight LOL, what's the deal with me being "on-call pretty(keyword) therapist? If this was meant as a compliment, I'll be happily accepting that (although I can misinterpreted what Miss Exp was trying to direct ) I'm awfully sorry Miss Dwilight! I'm appalled at how dense I am in not realising how that title may be misinterpreted. Pray accept my deepest apologies. How about the new title Pretty Busy therapist? Judge Exp -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-01-1009 11:18 AM: And for the sake of twisted fun, um...I mean, for educational purposes, may I propose we all continue to bombard My. Liu with jargon, ...I mean linguistic flair. And I, Judge Exp, is pleased to announce Mr. MYE as a new member of the village law office. You may decide on your title Sir. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Jenny on 08-01-1009 11:32 AM: I didn't know we had titles, Judge E. So what's mine, since I was your first official recruit into the law office? P.S: Do I get a higher post than anyone else (except you, of course)? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-01-1009 01:55 PM: You have one already dear: Jenny the Renowned Attorney. You can also come up with your custom title. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-01-1009 03:45 PM: quote: Just hope that you did not judge me by that paper that i posted on this thread, i had an awful time with that study, finished the whole thing in less than 2 months. The pain of publishing a paper...tell the slave about it Sir. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-01-1009 03:57 PM: Case 008: The Case of Identity (resolved outside court) The verdict: The 2 respectable gentlemen involved are going to "slug it out". Enough said. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by MYE on 08-01-1009 05:58 PM: quote: Originally posted by expression

And I, Judge Exp, is pleased to announce Mr. MYE as a new member of the village law office. You may decide on your title Sir. Thanks for the listing of the Court cases thus far your honor. About the title ah..... hmm... can't think of a good one at the moment how about : 'The rather Unhonorable, Co-Commissioner MYE?' Needs work I know... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Jaded MenEr on 08-01-1009 06:03 PM: Court = Law = Spcnat Government! Comment: Anarchy! ... lol ... just joking ... --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Editor: Oh look! Even Jaded is attracted to this anarchy!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 08-02-1009 02:02 AM:

Coming up next: Enters the Hunky Lawyer Pepe le Pew and JUDGE FREAK

Mmmmmm.... so what happened? Did Mike Lau win his lawsuit? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Editor: Check out this masterpiece newer forum member remember_Cedric drew for the courtroom!

But why did I look like a man with a beard (extreme left)?! Where on earth did my lush hair go!! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Jenny on 08-02-1009 02:07 AM: quote: Originally posted by expression You have one already dear: Jenny the Renowned Attorney. You can also come up with your custom title. Thanks, Judge E. That sounds , I will stick with that while at work in the law office -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by zbeauty on 08-04-1009 10:10 AM: Question: Judge Expression, what exactly does a guardian angel do again, besides looking good. Can i have some power, judge -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Pipi Le Pew on 08-04-1009 12:48 PM: Judge E., how can we keep Mike Lau from reverting to his former self ? Can we force SC to unveil her photoshoots to keep the happy Mike from turning back the grumpy Mike? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by James Lo on 08-04-1009 12:56 PM: here are some things that can be done. 1) Give him some burritos so he has to go to the bathroom more to get enlighten. Didn't the bathroom thing help him reform? 2) Give him the Can so he can post his unique comments to relief him from all that tension

(Editor's note: The Can was a thread started by Yan to redirect all random spam... of course, a single can would prove too small to contain all spam... )
3) Increase his post counts to 10,000,000 so he doesn't think posting so many post is require of him every day. 4) Lastly we should be nice to him cause he does write some funny things and have some interesting ideas. And the best I don't think he hurt anyone by being his multiple selfs.

(Editor: remember_Cedric actually reminds me of James - the friendly supportive guy next door.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Pipi Le Pew on 08-04-1009 01:01 PM: Actually, I like the old Mike also, funny and witty if one is not easily offended. A uniformly agreeable and polite society makes a boring one. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 08-04-1009 01:41 PM: Pipi Le Pew, I'd like to name my kid after you if that's ok with you. Ok so what's the verdict on my case? If there's no response, then it's a default win for me! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by James Lo on 08-04-1009 02:06 PM:

quote: Originally posted by Mike Lau Ok so what's the verdict on my case? If there's no response, then it's a default win for me! I think the verdict is just be yourself. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-04-1009 02:19 PM: quote: Originally posted by Pipi Le Pew Judge E., how can we keep Mike Lau from reverting to his former self ? Can we force SC to unveil her photoshoots to keep the happy Mike from turning back the grumpy Mike? If the respectable and handsome Mr. Lau is willing to post 19 pics of himself, then we can be sure he's pretty much set in being the selfless reformed Mike Lau + get to see SC's pic. This is called "killing 2 birdies with 1 stone". Judge Exp -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-04-1009 02:20 PM: quote: Originally posted by zbeauty Question: Judge Expression, what exactly does a guardian angel do again, besides looking good. Can i have some power, judge How about the "Sandman's Power" my dear: you may put anyone to sleep during cross-examination and just wake him/her again to hear the verdict. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-04-1009 02:25 PM: quote: Originally posted by Mike Lau Pipi Le Pew, I'd like to name my kid after you if that's ok with you. Ok so what's the verdict on my case? If there's no response, then it's a default win for me! The Verdict is: Mr. Lau may rename himself "The Even Hotter Han Solomon" or "Skunky Hunk Senior". James and Pipi, I like both the Old and Reformed Mike Lau. Come on baby, let the girls see your handsome face! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Pipi Le Pew on 08-04-1009 02:35 PM: Yes daddy, show your handsome face..... [Sorry to spam your thread your honoress. ] -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 08-04-1009 02:39 PM: NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! I volunteer to be locked up!!!!!!! Ok only one ONE condition. When Spcnat posts her pic first! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Pipi Le Pew on 08-04-1009 02:42 PM: quote: Originally posted by Mike Lau NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! I volunteer to be locked up!!!!!!!

Ok only one ONE condition. When Spcnat posts her pic first! Yes Mommy, show your pretty face ..... [Sorry again to spam your thread your honoress. ]

(Editor: No worry, no sorry, just add your spam to the tally!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-04-1009 02:44 PM: Well Sir, as long as it contributes to public welfare, Judge Exp won't consider it spam.

Congrats Mr. Lau, you see how many people like you here. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by eeeyore on 08-04-1009 03:35 PM: quote: Originally posted by Mike Lau Ok so what's the verdict on my case? If there's no response, then it's a default win for me! do you mean the verdict for harassing me? you were punished to re-write all pages of Judge E courtroom thread. Han quit as my lawyer, so we both lose... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-04-1009 03:50 PM: Don't be sad Miss Eeeyore, for we've found a Even hotter Han Solomon = Mr. Mike Lau. Everything's slow. Sue People!! It's free! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by eeeyore on 08-04-1009 04:07 PM: you sure Mike Lau is hotter that Han Solomon? I don't think so... Han Solomon is a doctor-wannabe-expert-of-wuxia and Mike is... spammer. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Dwilight on 08-04-1009 05:17 PM: quote: Originally posted by expression Don't be sad Miss Eeeyore, for we've found a Even hotter Han Solomon = Mr. Mike Lau. Everything's slow. Sue People!! It's free! Uh huh *nods her head*....Sue...Sue...come on people! Miss Expression is quite open nowaday and looking for more challenge to keep her busy Aside that this Court Therapist needs her perks as well -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 08-04-1009 09:36 PM: Sues Judge Expression for not being able to force spcnat to reveal her mug shot.

Punishment: a week alone with Hing! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by James Lo on 08-04-1009 10:06 PM: So basically the final verdict is based on if Mike Lau is a stud or dud in real life. And the only way to proof this is if he post his picture on the board. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Yan on 08-04-1009 10:11 PM: I posted Mike's Picture down in "the Can" thread.. you can check it out there. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 08-04-1009 10:32 PM: quote: Originally posted by Yan I posted Mike's Picture down in "the Can" thread.. you can check it out there. LOL what a clown! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Hing on 08-05-1009 05:03 AM: You guys ever watch Judge Judy on live television? She does three cases in 30 minutes plus commercials. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 08-05-1009 09:58 AM: Yeah talk about efficiency! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-05-1009 11:17 AM: quote: Originally posted by eeeyore you sure Mike Lau is hotter that Han Solomon? I don't think so... Han Solomon is a doctor-wannabe-expert-of-wuxia and Mike is... spammer. Miss Eeeyore, Mr. Lau is no common spamster. He is a spammaster, really cute too. (please see Miss Yan's picture) And do you know who is even hotter? The judge-scientist-wannabe-expert-of-Romance of the Three Kingdoms = Judge Expression. Thank you. (Editor: Ah, Three Kingdoms. My lost love Come back my passionate youth! ) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 08-05-1009 11:34 AM: Mike unsuspends Judge Expression from her job. Mr. Lau is quite the sucker for unfounded compliments. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-05-1009 11:36 AM: quote: Originally posted by Mike Lau Sues Judge Expression for not being able to force spcnat to reveal her mug shot. Punishment: a week alone with Hing! *Judge Exp raises her hand* Sir, may I spend a week alone with the cute Mr. Lau instead? --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Posted by Mike Lau on 08-05-1009 11:42 AM: Sure, if you don't mind the occasional epileptic seizures. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-05-1009 12:26 PM: Case X-2: The Plan to get SCs pic took a turn quote: Originally posted by Mike Lau Sues Judge Expression for not being able to force spcnat to reveal her mug shot. Judge Expression: Acting Judge Freak, youll have to take my place this time. Judge Freak *choked on her Freaky Lipsteak*: What? I thought Acting Judge means I dont have to do anything. (Editors note: Freaky Lipsteak is a popular delicacy on the Yan and Moogles menu) Exp: Well this time Im the defendant. Freak:So? You can be both the judge and the defendant. Exp: But theres conflict of interest. Freak: Corn-flakes of what? Exp: CONFLICT of interest, Judge F. Freak: Ah, of course I know. I graduated from Laughvard Law ya know? But I dont want to do it. Exp: And I must warn you that failure to fulfil responsibilities can result in grave consequences. Freak: Such as? Exp: Such as being banned from the village law office. Freak: So? Exp: and being banned from Yan & Moogles. Freak: Wait! Ill do it! Man you should have said it right at the beginning! *Judge Expression continues to sweat* To be continued -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by lavender dorange on 08-05-1009 02:11 PM: My dear expression, What was the term of our pre-nuptial agreement again? You get the kids and I get the house right? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Yan on 08-05-1009 02:32 PM: When did you make that pre nup... in your basement with Saddam? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by lavender dorange on 08-05-1009 02:34 PM: When my dear expression and I eloped to vegas of course .............. remember last month or so when she was gone from the forum for awhile? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 08-05-1009 02:39 PM: quote: Originally posted by lavender dorange When my dear expression and I eloped to vegas of course .............. remember last month or so when she was gone from the forum for awhile?

PROOF! We want PROOF of this nukular fusion between the beauty and the beast!!! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-05-1009 02:46 PM: quote: Originally posted by lavender dorange My dear expression, What was the term of our pre-nuptial agreement again? You get the kids and I get the house right?

*Judge Exp looking quite worried*: Judge Freak, what do you think Sir O is up to? Judge Freak: He's obviously hitting on his second choice. Congrats on being hit on by the hottest dude on spcnat. Judge Exp: Judge F: Sorry that's my job girl. Ya here to express, I'm here to freak. Judge Exp: Frankly speaking, I think he's taking revenge for my spamming his own thread, plus he's trying to get me banned by SC. Judge F: So whatta ya sitting here for girl? Go get this orange! Chief Executioner Express?... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-05-1009 05:14 PM: Case 007b - The Case of Somebody's fantasy took a turn quote: Originally posted by lavender dorange My dear expression, What was the term of our pre-nuptial agreement again? You get the kids and I get the house right? My dear Sir, I thought the terms are: 1. You get SC, I get Spcnat. 2. You get Saddam, I get Bush. 3. You get to rant, I get to baaa. 3. You get the juice, I get the peels. 4. You get to freak, I get to judge, and Mike gets to spam. , Judge Expression -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-05-1009 05:19 PM: Case 007b - The Case of Somebody's fantasy took a turn quote: Originally posted by lavender dorange When my dear expression and I eloped to vegas of course .............. remember last month or so when she was gone from the forum for awhile?

Yeah, I was there when Sir Orange and Saddam eloped, not to Vegas, but to Toronto. The Canadians were kind enough to legalise their marriage. It's a most touching moment. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Jenny on 08-05-1009 11:18 PM: Yes, and Judge E showed me the photos. Most lovely, they were -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 08-06-1009 12:25 AM: No wonder W can't find Saddam. He's having a wild affair with Lavender in the US! Wow Bush will never look here haha. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 08-06-1009 12:26 AM: Mr. T demands that you show these pics to Mike, or someone's gonna get hurt! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Check on 08-06-1009 05:08 AM: Judge Expression, I am interested in this pretty girl's email address but I wonder if she would give it to me. Rather in a dilemma now... if I should even get to know her better. I think she is really popular...do you think she will even notice me? That pretty girl has freaky lips though. Could your excellency PM me her email address? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by pocket on 08-06-1009 06:03 AM: Your excellency, I want to sue Check for not being gender-specific and hogging the many fine girls in this forum. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Honey on 08-06-1009 06:44 AM: Yo pocket! not Check's fault cause it has so much charms well... on the bright side, you still got Puppet master I will help puppet pick out a kimono for you wedding ok? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-06-1009 10:51 AM: Re: Re: Case 007b - The Case of Somebody's fantasy took a turn quote: Originally posted by Mike Lau No wonder W can't find Saddam. He's having a wild affair with Levendis in the US! Wow Bush will never look here haha. Aye, The seemingly most dangerous place is the safest place. Also Mr. Lau, let me assure you that Jenny and I were only sharing those photos for legal purposes. We are professionals. Judge Exp -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-06-1009 11:01 AM: Dear Check, I happen to know this pretty freaky girl in person, and I think she's both shy and friendly. Regarding popularity I believe she's slightly more popular than Sir Orange (of course being humble she'd declare she's less popular ) but much less popular than Miss Check. Judge Exp --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Posted by expression on 08-06-1009 12:07 PM: Case X-2: The Plan to get SC's pic took a WRONG turn Continued... Judge Freak steps into the courtroom with her Expressions Express Expresso. at Yan and Moogles) (Editors note: thats the best-seller

All Rise! Judge Freak: Hey! Arent you supposed to bow down before the judge? They all do that in that Judge Bao QingTian series. Judge Expression: Your honour, we are in 21st century North America, not ancient China. Judge F: Well that ZhanZhao dude is pretty hot I tell ya. Judge Bao's a lil' too plump though... Judge E: Your honour, were here for Case X-2. Judge F: Whats that? Judge E: Didnt you read the file your honour? Judge F: I hate reading. Why do you think I was the ACTING judge? But I did pass with flying colours at Laughvard Law ya know? I also won the Speechless Contest at Yell University. Judge E: Well I Judge F: Lets take a break folks. I need to pick up Grifis Lion Meat at Yan & Moogles. Judge Expression: Dont look at me -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by MYE on 08-06-1009 12:19 PM: quote: Originally posted by expression Aye, The seemingly dangerous place is the safest place. Also Mr. Lau, let me assure you that Jenny and I were only sharing those photos for legal purposes. We are professionals. So your honor, does this mean that all the staff employed by the Village Court get a legal exchange of photo's? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-06-1009 01:28 PM: It's included in the Law Employee's benefits package Sir. Why do you think there are so many lawyers on Spcnat? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Dwilight on 08-06-1009 01:32 PM: Um, that exclude me as I do work for "perks" but not consider as an employed, right your Honor? LOL -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-06-1009 01:37 PM: Of course that includes you Miss Dwilight. We share good things with each other like a family. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 08-06-1009 02:18 PM: quote: Originally posted by expression Aye, The seemingly most dangerous place is the safest place. Also Mr. Lau, let me assure you that Jenny and I were only sharing those photos for legal purposes. We are professionals. LOL I smell another lawsuit coming your way! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-06-1009 04:18 PM: Case X-2: The Plan to get SC's pic took a WRONG turn Case continues...

Judge Freak *with a mouthful of Grifis Lions Meat*: OK, Spit it out girl! Judge E: Well you see, your honour, Mr. Mike Lau sued me for failing to force SC to reveal her mug shot, but Ive neither signed any contract nor made any verbal agreement Judge F: Mike Lau? Whos that? Havent even heard of him. Judge E: There he is, your honour.

Judge F: THAT cute guy is Mike Lau?! Judge E: Your honour Judge F: Shut up. Of course youre wrong. Judge E: I beg your pardon? *Thunder & Lightning* To be continued... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by eeeyore on 08-06-1009 04:22 PM: Judge E, are you alright? why are talking to yourself? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-06-1009 04:28 PM: No worries Miss Eeeyore, Judge E (Expression) is talking to Judge F (Freak). As to why there're 2 judges, read up and you'll see. A refuse-to-admit-her-insanity Judge Expression -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by eeeyore on 08-06-1009 04:33 PM: oh ok... split personality huh? ck, ck... this is where the therapist needed... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 08-06-1009 04:38 PM: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-06-1009 04:48 PM: "I know you like it." - quote from anonymous member -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-06-1009 04:55 PM: Case X-2: The Plan to get SC's pic took a WRONG turn Thunder continues... Judge F: Of course cute Mikeys right. If he said youre guilty, you are. Judge E: WHAT THE HEY??!! Flirtation is prohibited in

Judge F: Mind your tongue, Judge Expression. Formal language is mandatory in the village court. I am the judge now, so I AM THE LAW! Judge E: Man!!! This is nuts!!!... Judge F: Thank you, you may step down now Judge E. Ive reached the verdict: 1. Judge Freak finds Judge Expression guilty of any crime Mikey, ummm Mr. Lau said she committed. 2. As punishment Judge Expression shall pay for a candle light dinner for Mr. Lau and Judge Freak at Yan & Moogles. 3. Mr. Lau shall be rewarded with a months stay with Judge Freak. Judge Expression: *Passes out*

The Public: JUSTICE! WHERE ART THOU??? Darkness falls in the absence of the just and honourable Judge Expression! Chaos is doomed to ensue!!! Notice: Case for advertisement purposes only. Judge Expressions courtroom service is the number 1 legal service in town. Dial now. Service is free and accessible 24/7. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 08-06-1009 05:26 PM: quote: Originally posted by expression "I know you like it." - quote from anonymous member Turn yourself in now. The RIAA is driving to your house this instant for copyright infringement.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by MYE on 08-06-1009 05:29 PM: My, Oh My, This is indeed the courts darkest day. O' justice, where art thou? The honorable judge has fallen! Ring the bells, toll out the death of justice! and please, call our service...

(Judge... Your honor, you can wake up now - or do we need to find you a replacement ) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Mike Lau on 08-06-1009 05:31 PM: Expression has been awarded the prestigious Mike Lau's Clown of the Week Award! Please step up to get your trophy and give your award acceptance speech. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Pipi Le Pew on 08-06-1009 05:31 PM:

Ooooh that dastardly commercial. Just when it gets juicy, it turns out to be just a message from you friendly neighborhood business partner ... * click new channel * -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Pipi Le Pew on 08-07-1009 10:05 AM: Pardon me your honor, do you mind posting the General Terms & Conditions of Employment for the Village law office again. I misplaced mine somewhere..... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-07-1009 10:46 AM: quote: Originally posted by Mike Lau Expression has been awarded the prestigious Mike Lau's Clown of the Week Award! I am surprised and touched!!!! This is the happiest moment in my life!! What should I do???!! *Runs away to order food for party* -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-07-1009 10:47 AM: quote: Originally posted by Pipi Le Pew Pardon me your honor, do you mind posting the General Terms & Conditions of Employment for the Village law office again. I misplaced mine somewhere..... Lol, interested in joining, skunky hunky lawyer? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by lavender dorange on 08-07-1009 11:03 AM: My dear expression, Have you posted your pix yet? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Pipi Le Pew on 08-07-1009 11:44 AM: Sir Orange, whatever happened to your weekend elopement in vegas? Were you too to remember? or did she you cold? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Jenny on 08-07-1009 12:04 PM: I seem to be pretty redundant here -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Pipi Le Pew on 08-07-1009 12:14 PM: Oh you won't get off that easily my dear Jenny. What say you to the charge of guynapping and brain-washing the Calvin? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Jenny on 08-07-1009 12:16 PM: I disavow all knowledge. Calvin merely informed me of his absence for those few days, that is all. You can ask him -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by lavender dorange on 08-07-1009 12:21 PM: My dear expression, If every man, woman, and child in China each stood on a chair, and everyone jumped off their chair at exactly the same time, would the earth be thrown off its axis? Also, if prior to jumping, they all yelled at the top of their lungs, would we hear it here in the United States, and how much of a time delay would there be?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-07-1009 12:44 PM: quote: Originally posted by lavender dorange My dear expression, Have you posted your pix yet?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-07-1009 12:47 PM: quote: Originally posted by Pipi Le Pew Sir Orange, whetever happened to your weekend elopement in vegas? Were you too to remember? or did she you cold? Awwwww Pipi, I ain't mean no harm. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-07-1009 12:51 PM: Jenny, where are you going?! Don't leave me alone! You're my legal advisor!! Enlighten us with your legal knowledge! And don't forget to come and have a piece of Freaky Lip'steak with me! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Jenny on 08-07-1009 01:28 PM: Not going anywhere, Judge E. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Yan on 08-07-1009 01:52 PM: Judge E or F I am suing Thorn for blackmailing/ Threatening. Here is the evidence:

Granny Yan, You are hereby warned that the picture below shows that you are riding a pony that appeared to be ill treated. Further you were riding, a pony that is way too small for you. This is cruelty to animals. Will report you to the SPCA, picture will be presented as evidence. However considering your past good behaviour, I will overlook this incident if you were to sent me $500.00 cash in unmarked notes. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Thorn on 08-07-1009 02:08 PM: Your Honour Judge E or F (or G), I did no such thing as blackmailing nor threatening Ms Yan. I was simply kind hearted to warn her of further abuse of the forementioned animal. The money demanded from her was for the purpose purchasing good animal feed and good care of the pony that was quite obviously ill feed and ill rested. I submit the picture posted by Ms Yan as evidence.

(Editors note: I lost the original picture, so I used a similar replacement) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Yan on 08-07-1009 02:13 PM: Sir Thorn is saying that he thinks that animal I was riding is real. Is there any other evidence that Granny is abusing animal? Your honour, I demand Sir Thorn to wear glasses! And stop accusing me of Animal abuse person! This is what Sir Thorn Wrote. Granny Yan, You are hereby warned that the picture below shows that you are riding a pony that appeared to be ill treated. Further you were riding, a pony that is way too small for you. This is cruelty to animals. Will report you to the SPCA, picture will be presented as evidence. However considering your past good behaviour, I will overlook this incident if you were to sent me $500.00 cash in unmarked notes. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by MYE on 08-07-1009 02:22 PM: Wowow, a new court case! lemme, see How about 'Thorn's Hammer' as the casename?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Thorn on 08-07-1009 02:23 PM:

Your Honour, I believe that Ms Yan is riding that animal that is real. Why would Ms Yan ride an animal that is not real. Any person of sound mind will not ride an animal that is not real. Either way: if the animal is not real, then Ms Yan state of mind is questionable, thus her complaint should be thrown out. Or if the animal is real, my position that Ms Yan is an animal abuser, has merits. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Yan on 08-07-1009 02:31 PM: Hahaha.... this is way too funny. Thorn.. you remind me of a person who is in the hospital due to ran over by sheep.

MYE... did you draw that?? We gotta frame that and hang on the SPC wall! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Big_Good_Jon on 08-07-1009 03:08 PM: Eh hem. recent editing has left this post....pointless. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Dwilight on 08-07-1009 03:10 PM: Aw, dang...that sketch by MYE is quite hilarious! Aww, Yan, isn't Big Bad John really sweet at heart! The 2 of you should make up now -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Yan on 08-07-1009 03:10 PM: quote: Originally posted by Big_Good_Jon After Filing through recent compaints of my eh hem vulgar language, I launch a formal apology to Yan after saying that she spends too much time on spcnat and needing to take a break. Could it be done in PM Jon?? I would be very much appreciated it. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-07-1009 03:16 PM: Judge E shows off her physics quote: Originally posted by lavender dorange If every man, woman, and child in China each stood on a chair, and everYane jumped off their chair at exactly the same time, would the earth be thrown off its axis? Also, if prior to jumping, they all yelled at the top of their lungs, would we hear it here in the United States, and how much of a time delay would there be? My dear Sir, To answer your question we must take a break from law and talk a little physics. Recall Newton's law: F = ma where F = force, m = mass, a = acceleration

Now in your hypothetical case, a is quite small since our comrades are merely jumping off a chair (assume all chairs used are of the same height). But the combined mass is great, thus the foreseen danger. To save our good Mother Earth then, may I suggest that the selfless Sir Orange volunteer to jump at the same time at the opposite end of the world (USA) to balance the force. Since the mass of one Orange is quite small, he will need to jump from a very high building such as the Empire State Building to achieve the required acceleration. Of course whether the orange is still edible after the jump is doubtful. As for the latter part of the question, I seriously dont have a definite answer. But I shall hypothesize that the time required for NA people to hear the Chinese = the time required for our fellow Spcies to hear Sir Orange ranting off in front of his computer. Professor Expression -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Big_Good_Jon on 08-07-1009 03:20 PM: Sorry Yan, i'll do it now and edit my recent post. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by MYE on 08-07-1009 03:29 PM: quote: Originally posted by Yan Hahaha.... this is way too funny. Thorn.. you remind me of a person who is in the hopital due to ran over by sheep.

MYE... did you draw that?? We gotta frame that and hang on the SPC wall! Most definately my fantastic art Oh, we'll have to hang all my 'art' on the walls and sign it thus:

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by expression on 08-07-1009 03:40 PM: Case 008: The Case of "Thorn"s Hammer *Reads Yan's statement* *reads Thorn's statement* *reads the other thread, smells a rat* Oh dear, look at the evidence I gathered: quote: posted by Thorn: I need money to subsidize my medical bills. Perhaps, you can start a collection or a charity for me. quote: posted by Yan:

Yan Just open the Thorn Fund!!! Thorn Fund is for Sir Thorn who ran over by Sheep *cough cough* and hospitalized for the injury. Sir Thorn is poor and needs more love. Please donate some money for the fund ... it will help Sir Thorn's hospital bills. I hereby pronounce that the village law office refuses to handle a case with the purpose of advertising for a fund. Why, Miss Yan and Sir Thorn seems more like friends to me. "Yeah, let's raise some money together!" The above is written and signed by: Judge Expression (Editor: Wow! Arent you impressed by Judge Expressions superhuman ability to see through all conspiracies? ) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------Posted by Yan on 08-07-1009 03:50 PM: Oops... yes... Thorn.. we got cut... darn.. can't cheat Judge F..nono... Judge E. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------