What To Do When You Are Unhappy

Feeling unhappy, depressed, lonely? Are you missing someone, feeling dejected or
nursing a broken heart? Pull yourself up and get your act together for no one can solve
your depression but you.

Forget about alcohol, cigarettes and other artificial anti-depressants. They will just leave
you more depressed when their temporary effects lose their efficacy on you. The thing to
do is analyze and find the root of your unhappiness so that you can deal with it in a more
direct and rational way. And stop feeling like a victim. Take heart because as Dr. Robert
Anthony says, "The only people without problems are in cemeteries."

So what do you do when you are unhappy? Snap out of it, that's what!

1. Keep Busy.
An idle mind is the devil's playground. Keep your mind busy - lose yourself in an
interesting book or an engaging movie. Keep your body busy - take a brisk walk,
workout at the gym or enroll in a dance class. Moving the body increases the flow of
your endorphins giving you an energizing natural high. And consider fighting for a cause
- it will provide you a strong rallying point and a profound reason for being.

2. Be In The Company Of Others.

Solitude amplifies misery. Being with other people and being exposed to their own share
of problems or successes will take your mind away from whatever is depressing you.
Choose to be with positive and fun-loving people. Have a great laugh by sharing silly
jokes, enjoy a pleasant concert at the park or simply go malling - that should be enough
to get you tired and make you pine for a good night's sleep instead of spending late
hours dwelling on your problems.

3. Develop Your Passions And Talents.

Concentrate on something you love doing. Whether it is knitting, cross-stitching,
playing a musical instrument, singing, painting, indulging in a sport or flower arranging,
devote your time on a passion you enjoy doing most. Aside from taking your mind off
your troubles, you get to hone your talents and skills as well as make productive use of
your time.

4. Write Down A Letter To Yourself.

This may sound crazy but it works. Write down what you are unhappy about and why;
then list down some possible solutions to solve or alleviate it. Be gentle and caring with
your words. Tell yourself that you are concerned about you and that you will do
everything in your power to make you happy and full of joy again. Always remember
that you are your own best man.

5. Make A Gratitude List.

Top TV host Oprah Winfrey encourages people to keep a gratitude journal - a daily
listing of things that make life wonderful, no matter how insignificant. Most often it is
really the little things that go unnoticed in life that count - our breath, a gentle touch, a
kind word. Make a list of "What's good about my life right now" and be grateful for it.
This will make you count your blessings instead of crying over your miseries.

6. Trick Yourself By Focusing On Another Emotion Or Desire.

Shift your attention away from whatever is causing your unhappiness. Focus your
attention on that gorgeous Sonia Rykiel ensemble, Manolo Blahnik shoes or even those
stunning hazel contact lenses you've been desiring to wear; try that luscious osso bucco
at that pricey Italian restaurant; get an energizing full body accupressure massage; or
embark on the dream cruise you've been longing to take. Escape your unhappiness -
focus on something else that brings you even just momentary joy.

7. Make Someone Else Happy.

What can cure unhappiness? Happiness, of course. And one of the best ways to make
yourself happy is to make somebody else happy. Do a good deed for someone, feed a
streetchild, visit and bring fruits to your grandma, treat your driver's family to a fully-
paid day of entertainment, console a friend who is in worse condition than you are.
When you give happiness, you will get it back a thousandfold. You will even find out that
you are so much luckier than most people.

8. Meditate.
Forget everything momentarily and just concentrate on your breath. Gently close your
eyes and let your mind float on the soft blackness that you see. Breathe in and out slowly
and regularly and focus on the life-giving movement and sound of the air as you inhale
and exhale. After a while in this induced semi-alpha state, empty your mind of all
negativities and thoughts. Meditate on the wonder of having nothing in your mind - just
the awe-inspiring miracle of your being alive.

9. Find A Best Friend Or Confidante.

In moments of great stress or depression, we all need a listening ear to pour our troubles
to and a comforting shoulder to cry on. Have a best friend who is sympathetic and truly
cares for you, a soulmate you can open up to who will help you unload your cares and
release your worries. Understanding and supportive friends give you strength when you
need it most but always remember to return the favor when they too need your help.

10. Get A Pet Or Nurture A Plant.

In the concrete jungle of the city, it is sometimes hard to find a soulmate who has
unlimited time to devote to you. If you need unconditional companionship of someone
or something you can talk you, get a pet or nurture a plant. A playful goldfish, a graceful
feline, a loyal dog, a furry hamster or a growing plant will provide you live
companionship in moments of loneliness. Feeding and caring for them awaken your
nurturing emotions and remind you of the interdependency of all creation. You will also
realize your worth and the difference you can make in the world.

11. Fall In Love.

Love is the cure-all, the panacea for all of man's cares and woes. Love is the most
positive and uplifting feeling that can make even your worst problems seem
insignificant, your greatest challenges surmountable. Love gives you a deeper reason to
emancipate yourself from whatever is making you unhappy. But make sure you don't fall
in love just to escape your troubles. Weigh everything first before making any solid
commitments to be fair to the other person. Yes, love can make you well, love can make
it right, love truly conquers all.

12. Pray.
Praying is a very potent antidote for problems, loneliness and inner pain. To be effective,
prayers must be heartfelt and repetitive because the subconscious mind works through
repetition. That's why most established praying (like the rosary and mantra chanting)
are almost hypnotically repetitious. It is the mental and spiritual imprinting (radicals
call it brainwashing) that makes a prayer powerful. With it, you gain great emotional
and spiritual strength and establish that much-needed connection to your soul.