DECEMBER 2013

PLUGGED IN
A MONTHLY PUBLICATION TO HELP PARENTS BETTER PLUG INTO THE SPIRITUAL DEVELOPMENT OF THEIR STUDENT.

December Issue
THIS MONTH

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THE GATHERING (12/4) GIRLS MINISTRY (12/15) NO STUDENT WORSHIP (12/25 OR 1/1)

COMING SOON

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THE GATHERING (1/15) DNOW (1/17-19) Keep eyes and ears open for Sunday School class Christmas parties!

MERRY CHRISTMAS
EACH CHRISTMAS WE OFTEN FIND OURSELVES JOURNEYING BACK DOWN MEMORY LANE AS YOU PULL OUT ORNAMENTS FROM YEARS PAST. THIS YEAR, WE HAVE A SPECIAL GIFT FOR EACH FAMILY IN OUR STUDENT MINISTRY. WE HAVE AN ORNAMENT THAT WE WOULD LIKE FOR YOU TO HAVE. WE HOPE YOU WILL USE THIS ORNAMENT NOT JUST AS A REMINDER TO ANOTHER CHRISTMAS GONE BY, BUT AS A CONVERSATION PIECE TO ENGAGE YOUR FAMILY WITH THE TRUE MEANING OF CHRISTMAS. WE HOPE THAT YEAR AFTER YEAR, IN THE MIDST OF ALL THE HUSTLE AND BUSTLE, YOU WILL MAKE TIME TO TALK ABOUT THE REAL STORY OF CHRISTMAS! COME BY OUR STUDENT MINISTRY OFFICE TO PICK UP YOUR GIFT!
A publication of IBC Student Ministry. www.ibclrstudents.org 2013

VOLU NTEER SPOTLIGHT

MARK GUINEE

ENGAGE

NOT ANOTHER DATE ON THE CALENDAR!?!?

EQUIP

HELPING TEENS MAKE HEALTHY DECISIONS

STUDENT MINISTRY STAFF

Matt Hubbard
Lead Student Pastor
FAVORITE CHRISTMAS GIFT: Optimus Prime or G.I. Joe stuff

Melissa Sponer
Girls Ministry Associate
FAVORITE CHRISTMAS GIFT: Little Tykes Full Kids Kitchen Set

Ross Spigner
Middle School Pastor
FAVORITE CHRISTMAS GIFT: Toy Box with pop-up Basketball Goal and Punching Bag

Amanda Beach
Ministry Assistant
FAVORITE CHRISTMAS GIFT: Mail-order My Little Pony Stable
!

From Our Heart

! Over the past few weeks, Cassie and I have started the joyously arduous task [insert sarcasm] of pottytraining Jackson. To you veteran parents, you may not remember that time in your life while others are chuckling remembering those days. For some it is a breeze and others, like us, not so easy. My dad taught me a long time ago that one of the few ways to guarantee failure is to never try to begin with. This is so true considering our current parenting journey. But isnt it true throughout all of our lives, especially with parenting, whether with discipline or potty-training...driving lessons or after-church conversations. ! During this holiday season, my challenge to you is to try investing spiritually in the life of your student. Some of you are are already doing this and it is going great. For others, this investment has started to stagnate, maybe your teen seems less interested or youve run out of ideas. For others, youve tried getting started, but keep hitting roadblocks or pushback from your student. Whatever the reason...the excuse, you have a unique opportunity that only comes around once a year--Thanksgiving/Christmas. ! Take advantage of the holiday time together whether driving to see family or shivering in a duck blind. Engage and encourage conversation with your student. Dont just limit the content of your talks to how was your day. Step it up a notch. Your students desire to be challenged, especially by their parents. If you have to, use the excuse that Thanksgiving/Christmas only comes around once a year. The greatest failure a parent can make is having never tried to actual parent your children as God intended. I would even say that that is also the biggest failure of the church...our society.

A publication of IBC Student Ministry. www.ibclrstudents.org 2013 A publication of IBC Student Ministry. www.ibclrstudents.org 2013

WEB ON THE aith Sticky F

NT IN PRI Melleby Derek y b t oun o ollege C C e k Guide t a l M a c li ib A B tunity: r o p p O p Age of id Trip aul Dav P y b ns ing Tee t n e r a P

VOLUNTEER SPOTLIGHT
MARK GUINEE
MY FAMILY: ! " " " " " " ! " " " ! " " " ! ! ! " " " ! ! " " " ! ! ! ! ! " BRENDA (WIFE...MARRIED 1981) " PHILLIP (ENGAGED TO LAURIN) THOMAS (AGE...17) BEBO (HOUND FROM THE POUND) I TEACH THE 6TH/7TH GRADE BOYS. 8 YEARS. WHEREVER THE NEXT GO TRIP IS! STEAK AND SHRIMP. THE PARABLE OF THE WEDDING FEAST BECAUSE GOD HAS INVITED US TO JOIN HIM AT THE FEAST, EVEN THOUGH WE ARE GENTILES. I DIDNT COME TO KNOW CHRIST UNTIL I WAS 22 YEARS OLD. PLUS, IM AN EXPERT IN FIXING NEARLY ANYTHING WITH DUCT TAPE! " " " "

WHERE I SERVE: ! ! I HAVE SERVED FOR: !

MY DREAM VACATION DESTINATION IS: ! MY FAVORITE SNACK FOOD IS: ! MY FAVORITE BIBLE STORY IS: ! " " " " ! ! "

SOMETHING NOT MANY PEOPLE KNOW ABOUT ME: ! " " " " " "

www.vimeo. com/

www.facebo ok.com/

www.twitter. com/

www.instagr am.com/

A publication of IBC Student Ministry. www.ibclrstudents.org 2013

Football Banquet

2013 / December
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The Gathering 5:45-7:30

MS GUYS Christmas Party 6:30 - 9:00 Read through the Bible

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Read through the Bible

Big Day Worship at 9:00am No Sunday School 10th Grade 9:00 SS Christmas Party last DGroup meeting

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Student Worship MS (5:45-7:15) HS (6:15-8:00)

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Student Worship MS (5:45-7:15) HS (6:15-8:00) CHRISTMAS

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HS GUYS 10:30 SS Christmas Party

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building closes at noon

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building closes at noon

COMING SOON

January 1 January 8 January 15 January 17-19 January 26

No Wednesday night worship - Happy New Year! Wednesday night worship starts back The Gathering DNOW (Save the Date!) DGroups start back up!

SS Christmas parties.....stay tuned.

A publication of IBC Student Ministry. www.ibclrstudents.org 2013

A publication of IBC Student Ministry. www.ibclrstudents.org 2013

ENGAGE

NOT ANOTHER DATE ON THE CALENDAR!?!?

As a student ministry, we do not see our ministry as just to those who are at our events or campus. Nor do we see our ministry as only to teenagers. We view our student ministry as a ministry to all those connected to teenagers...peers, teachers, co-workers, teammates, parents, etc. Parents, we see your role as primary spiritual provider for your student. We understand the reality of fullling this responsibility is nearly impossible in todays culture. We know rst hand the chaos of life. Have you ever tried to schedule a major student event for a student ministry that has hundreds of students from over two dozen schools? Its crazy! We know that you have no more wiggle room in your schedule as it is. Its a constant struggle juggling everyones schedules while also trying to lead your students to be a part of the right/best things. As we continue to develop our parent ministry, we are trying not to add ANOTHER date to your already slammed schedules. Rather, we are going to leverage existing things where you are likely already engaged. For example, you will probably begin to notice more parent meetings or conferences during times on Sundays and Wednesdays when you are already on campus. As you know, the largest in-house student ministry event (DNOW) that we do is just around the corner on January 17-19, 2014. MANY of you are already making plans to volunteer that weekend, which is incredible! This year, however, we want to challenge you during DNOW as well. As stated earlier, we are trying to leverage existing things/events rather than scheduling new dates. This year, we will be adding a couple of new features for parents during DNOW. On Saturday morning, we will do an intense equipping time with the parent volunteers who are helping with DNOW.

On Sunday morning, we are inviting all parents of students involved with DNOW to join us for a time of reection and celebration for what God did throughout DNOW. We will have a special time for parents and students in either Horne Hall or the Gym and then we will attend HighPoint together. So whats the challenge for you, you ask? Well, I want to challenge you to begin thinking now of those other parents. You know, the ones whose house your student crashes at on some Saturday nights? The

would you begin inviting some parents of those you know already who will be attending DNOW to join us Sunday? By Matt Hubbard

EQUIP
(NOTE: IBC Student Ministry does not necessarily endorse the content and viewpoints expressed in these articles.They are posted here for purposes of keeping you informed as to what is happening in the world of youth culture.)

HELPING TEENS MAKE HEALTHY DECISIONS

http://bit.ly/healthydecisions It was when my own children were toddling around our house that a father of a teenage boy asked me a question I'll never forget: "How can I expect my son to hear the still small voice of God with all those other voices screaming in his ears?" I never fully understood the seriousness of his question until my children entered their teenage years. Like their peers in the generation labeled "Millennial Kids", my children are facing an unprecedented array of attitude and behavioral choices while growing up in a postmodern culture that says the nal court of appeal is how "I feel" at any given moment in time. ! The "voices" are getting louder. While there are lots of kids making good choices, teenage behavior indicates far too many are traveling through adolescence and into adulthood without making good decisions. ! There are the "will I or won't I" decisions all kids face. Usually related to moral and ethical dilemmas, the negative fruit of their decisions can be seen in some of the current statistics on teen behavior. By the time they reach their senior year in high school, over 65% will have had sexual intercourse. Almost 55% will have used some illicit drug. Over 70% of high school students and 54% of middle school students admit to cheating during the prior 12 months. ! In addition, they all face the "what should I do?" decisions. While not always related to issues of right and wrong, these choices

amanda@ibclr.org
parent sitting at the other end of the bleachers at the basketball game? The parent who is in the carpool line behind you? Would you consider asking them the following: (1) would their student be interested in going to DNOW? and (2)

A publication of IBC Student Ministry. www.ibclrstudents.org 2013

are nonetheless extremely important. The adolescent years are lled with questions about what music to listen to and what media to watch. Teens make choices on how to spend their time and money. What about choices related to vocation and how I will spend my life? They make daily decisions on friends and issues related to peer pressure. They make important choices on how to handle and resolve interpersonal conict. Will I marry? Who will I marry? What role will faith play in my life? The list goes on and on. ! What role do you as a parent play in helping your teen wade through these choices and onto the point of healthy decision making? Wether you know it or not, you do play a powerful role. In fact, even though it may seem like all those other inuences may drown you out, you still play the most signicant role of anyone in their young lives. ! Deuteronomy 6 and the rest of the Scriptures clearly teach us that God has established parents as the primary spiritual guides and nurturers in their childrens' lives. One of the most important tasks we face as parents of teens is our God-given responsibility to help them make good decisions in this confusing world. What are some of the steps we can take to guide our teens into making healthy decisions? Here a few timely and helpful suggestions: ! First, understand that they are extremely vulnerable to making wrong choices. When I nd myself expecting my kids to respond to a situation by making the same choice I would make, I'm not being fair. I forget that my decision-making ability has grown out of years of accumulated wisdom and experience that I've gained over 45 years of making mistakes! My kids don't have that same experience. Add to that the fact that they are going through the most change and question-lled period of life, and it's easier to see that it's tough for them to go it alone. I often describe teens as "walking question marks trying to nd their way through the earthquake of adolescence." But even though they are vulnerable to making bad choices, teenagers are just as able to make good choices. The key? They need us to walk alongside as guides while we take the time to answer their questions and guide them

through the earthquake of adolescence. God has given them the gift of parents. ! Second, we must realize that the best way for us to train them to make good decisions is through example. "Because I said so!" isn't a reason we can give them as we make their decisions for them. Instead, we've got to go beyond words to tap into the incredible power of example. Before we tell them how and what to decide, we've got to show them how and what to decide through consistent example. Invite them into your decisionmaking process by allowing them to watch you struggle with, process, and come to some resolution on the di"cult decisions you need to make. Be sure that your life is shaped and guided by God's Word and that you aggressively seek to integrate your faith into all areas of your life. This generation of millennial kids is prone to learn relationally rather than propositionally. "Show and tell" is the way they learn best. For better or for worse, parents are still the most powerful role models in a young person's life. ! Third, teaching teens to make good decisions can't happen without giving them the gift of our time. The power of example and positive guidance increases as we act on the resolve to spend time with our kids. Lack of time is interpreted by them as rejection. Rejection can quickly grow into resentment. Resentment is the seed bed of rebellion. Teenage rebellion is often a deliberate e#ort to do the exact opposite of a parent's desire and can be at the root of many unhealthy decisions. ! Fourth, be proactive, looking for any and every opportunity to guide them into good decision making. One of the keys to parenting teens is knowing how to seize and make the most of those "teachable moments" that come several times a day. When they face a point of decision, create an atmosphere for openness so that they will seek your advice. That atmosphere of openness is best created by being a good listener. Once they know they've been respectfully heard, your job is to gracefully shoot straight, letting them know where you stand on the issue and why. ! Fifth, teach them to use Scripture as a decision-making guide. We live in a day and age where personal feelings and

preference have become the guides for living and deciding. Perhaps the loudest lesson spoken by our words and example must be that there is an unchanging standard of right and wrong that lies outside ourselves and that true freedom can only be found by living according to that standard. The light of God's Word illumines all of life and each choice we make. The Scriptures are clear that blessing comes from following the guidance of God's Word (Psalm 1; II Timothy 3:16). We must train them to search the Scriptures for guidance and direction. God has something to say about matters of honesty, integrity, character, work ethic, sexual behavior, substance abuse, vocation, athletics, time, dating, etc. Making a decision based solely on how something "feels" is a dangerous way to live. ! And sixth, we must use stories to teach them that all decisions have consequences. Stories connect with kids by putting meat on the bones of abstract concepts and ideas. One of the best ways to help our kids consider the consequences and implications of their decisions is by pointing them to others who have reaped the benets of good choices and the painful agony of bad choices. The Facebo Bible is full of stories that can be read and ok I talk to kids about sexual retold. Whenever choices I tell them about David's adulterous relationship with Bathsheeba. While the story itself is powerful, Instagra it's David's gut-wrenching cries m of remorse in Psalm 51 that shed light on the result of sexual sin. The newspaper is full of stories about the consequences of both good and bad decisions. Finally, don't be afraid to Twitter tap into your own experience, giving your kids rsthand accounts of the good and bad choices you've made over the course of your life. Your honesty and vulnerability about your own life goes aVimeo long way in cementing these lessons into your child's head and heart. ! Every parent must remember that teens who grow up in today's youth culture face lots of confusing decisions. It's a tough world out there and the "voices" are loud. They need your voice and life to reect the voice of the Creator. Are your speaking to them?
By Dr. Walt Mueller, President of Center for Parent and Youth Understanding (CPYU)

A publication of IBC Student Ministry. www.ibclrstudents.org 2013

IBC STUDENT MINISTRY

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A publication of IBC Student Ministry. www.ibclrstudents.org 2013