Breazeale, Sebastian Collin Ludlow-Mattson Eng 114 10/21/13

Drowning

Some say drowning is the one of the worst deaths imaginable - many people initially panic, then began to feel an intense burning in the lungs, and finally the world slowly becomes a dark dream, with reality gradually becoming dimmer all around them until they eventually fade away into nothingness. And drowning isnt relegated to just any specific place or group of people either it can happen deep out at sea, at the local lake, or even just in their own backyard. That overwhelming feeling of helplessness, literally permeating your body until you can no longer even think for yourself, is indicative of the overall experience of drowning. Their last moments contain no thoughts of anything else but the here and now, and they begin to have tunnel vision. Interestingly, when we examine Sherman Alexies The Absolutely True Diary of A Part-Time Indian and Ta-nehisis Coates A Culture of Poverty, one can see the similarities between the feelings and actions of someone drowning and those of someone who lives in poverty. Both authors describe the effects poverty had on their lives, the ramifications of which resemble those of drowning, in the way that while both men were still alive while they were poor, much of their lives were spent in isolation, trying to save always save themselves. On top of that, those around them were in the same situation, so blinded and ignorant because of their poverty that they failed to see any of the few ways out that they had. Many of Coates peers and communities turned to violence, while most of the people

around Arnold resorted to alcoholism as their savior. In both writings, the authors face the consequences of their communities poverty each and every day mounting feelings of both isolation and hopelessness that invade countless facets of their everyday lives, clouding judgment, perpetuating ignorance, and creating an overall feelings of destitution which resonates throughout their whole community. Throughout Alexies The Absolutely True Diary of A Part-Time Indian, were given the image of a reservation undergoing a cultural pause, stuck in the perpetual mud of poverty. No matter where Arnold turns, he sees only his own reality little to no food, no adequate healthcare, and no one to turn to for support. What he fails to see is the reality of the world outside of his own, and he begins to lose sight of the little things in life. First and foremost, Alexie definitively attributes poverty to those on the reservation failing to be able to see the good little aspects of life: eating their favorite foods, watching or playing a sport, or simply sitting down and enjoying a novel. Poverty, like drowning, inhibits many of those on the reservation from even remembering what brought them joy in the first place. The reality of their situation sinks in the gnawing hunger, persistent aches and pains, with only a bottle as their savior. The persistence of it all is what gets to most people, and its apparent to see how easy it is to fall into a downward spiral. However, it isnt as if Arnold dug himself his hole, it was his reality before he was even born. Arnold describes the timeline of his poverty as an almost everpresent entity, saying And it's not like my mother and father were born into wealth. It's not like they gambled away their family fortunes. My parents came from poor people who came from poor people who came from poor people, all the way back to the very first poor people. (Alexie, 11) Here, Alexie gives us an insight into just how much the

aura of hopelessness rests in his culture. To him, hes always been poor, so already he carries the weight of it on his shoulders. Alexies insight into the nature of poverty is a dark reminder of the reality of what goes on everyday in our country, with countless individuals experiencing the isolation and fear associated with being poor.

Similar to Arnold in his youth, Ta-Nehisi Coates early encounters with poverty altered and affected his way of living and thinking all the way into his adult life. Coates anecdote with his old media buddy, where he resorts to physically intimidating a critic over a relatively simply disagreement, portrays this plainly, with Coates saying, As a younger man, I would have been proud of that moment. Growing up, Coates explains the kind of ironic shield many built around themselves as a result of their poverty ironic in the way that its a protection from the problem it creates. This shield is violence, and its violence that plays a big part in not only Coates life but also the lives of those trapped around him, which he explains when he says If you are a young person living in an environment where violence is frequent and random, the willingness to meet any hint of violence with yet more violence is a shield. To me, Coates wasnt necessarily a fan of violence growing up, it was just more a necessity of the situation than anything. Like Arnold, some individuals in Coates community have developed a solution to their poverty, ironically only digging their own graves faster. As their own realities become more and more morose, many individuals problems boil down to simply defending their own neighborhoods and families from other (usually also poor) neighborhoods and families. However, Coates raises the question of, what are they really fighting for in the first place? The irony of the violence is that it has literally no benefit to those in the

community; in fact, the violence is usually a detriment to any progress being made. Why then is the violence and street culture as Coates describes so prevalent? From the text, Coates explains that To the young people in my neighborhood, friendship was defined by having each other's back. And in that way, the personal shields, the personal willingness to meet violence with violence, combined and became a collective, neighborhood shield--a neighborhood rep. In other words, the reality of being poor leads to an unhealthy world view, basically boiling down to only allowing those who you see as beneficial (usually as protection) to become close in any way. This, on top of the various other elements of street culture, are like weights, and each weight makes it harder and harder to escape from a life of poverty. This hypothetical drowning is the cause of many elements of street culture, particularly the misguided violence, because as Coates and those around him experience and live amongst a culture of poverty, that experience shifts itself into a misinformed world view, and lends itself to the creation of an overarching Me Vs. The World mentality. As their vision of their own world becomes increasingly bleak, so to does their vision of how they see themselves, contributing further to a warped view of reality. However, Coates ends his piece with an interesting take on the situation, stating I don't say this to minimize culture, to the contrary, I say it to point how difficult it is to get people to discard practices which were essential to them in one world, but hinder their advancement into another. And then there's the fear of that other world, that sense that if you discard those practices, you have discarded some of yourself, and done it in pursuit of a world, that you may not master. Here, Coates really lays out the brunt of the problem within these kinds of poverty-ridden communities the fear of the unknown. While everyone who is poor (hopefully) wants to change their life

for the better, there lies another ignorant and ironic fear in being seen as weak or even worse, being seen as a traitor to your own community, just like Arnold was when he first attended school off the reservation. In all, Coates piece has described a minutely different, but overall similar environment to that of Alexies character Arnold, showing readers the reality of those living within a separate, isolated, and on top of it all, hopeless existence.

Throughout the readings of both The Absolutely True Diary of A Part-Time Indian and A Culture of Poverty, readers can find countless examples of the immense weight poverty places on the heads of those living in poor communities, as well as shedding light on the effects of such an existence. Perhaps Arnold himself describes the feelings best when he says, It sucks to be poor, and it sucks to feel that you somehow deserve to be poor. You start believing that you're poor because you're stupid and ugly. And then you start believing that you're stupid and ugly because you're Indian. And because you're Indian you start believing you're destined to be poor. It's an ugly circle and there's nothing you can do about it. (Alexie, 13) Like Arnold, the realities of street life permeate Coates individual traits all the way into adulthood, literally becoming engrained in the mind-state of the poor and disheveled around him. Once being poor became a part of his life, it continued to pull him and his community down further and further into isolation. Once youre poor, few people outside your community look your way, and none of those around you can help you out, and it just becomes this vicious cycle of hate, violence, and fear, all of which feed of each other until the lives of those effected become so clouded with thoughts of being poor, that they begin to lose sight of

their own dreams, their own emotions, and eventually their direction in life. Life becomes so painful, you may even begin to lack the ability to dream, as described by Arnold when he says But we reservation Indians don't get to realize our dreams. We don't get those chances. Or choices. We're just poor. That's all we are. (Alexie, 13) Im sure most people, as well as both authors, would agree once you get to the point in life where you can no longer see yourself achieving your own dreams (or even having any) you have officially hit rock bottom, and it then lies on the individual to somehow garner the power required to save themselves from their own hopeless reality.

Like drowning, becoming destitute to the extent of those in either text can happen either gradually, or all at once. Life can be going fine and dandy one moment, than be taken away in an instant this kind of insecurity is a reality of most of our lives. However, perhaps this fleeting fear is good thing in our lives, serving as an ever-present reminder of the possible consequences for poor decisions. Is this fear any different than the fear we feel when weve already hit rock bottom though? Perhaps, but what we know for sure is that once that fear and insecurity overwhelms you and becomes an integral part of your existence, youve already taken a tumble down the path of isolation, and with that isolation comes the darkness. The further down an individual sinks, the more the darkness encroaches on their vision, whittling ones needs and interests down to the most basic of essentials. Once your poor, the joy you once got from eating your favorite foods is gone youll be lucky to eat at all; enjoying a basketball game becomes out of the question how can you just sit there, and waste what little time you have not doing something productive? Its this process that is revealed and detailed in both writings,

which serve as reminders to the monoliths of poverty both authors overcame. Coming away, Ive been given a better understanding of the how poverty really feels, yet I still understand no textbook or description could ever give you the true feelings of isolation experienced by these men, as well as countless other individuals in their lives. Like drowning, poverty erases the thoughts and hopes of anyone it touches and, like drowning, poverties implications and results are unfortunately just as dark and powerful.
Alexie, Sherman. The Absolutely True Diary of A Part Time Indian. Ta-Nehisi Coates A Culture of Poverty. The Atlantic. The Atlantic Monthly Group. 20 Oct. 2010. Web. 7 Nov. 2013