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Portrait of an INFJ - Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Judging

(Introverted Intuition with Extraverted Feeling)

As an INFJ, your primary mode of living is focused internally, where you take things in primarily via intuition. Your secondary mode is external, where you deal with things according to how you feel a out them, or how they fit with your personal value system. INFJs are gentle, caring, complex and highly intuitive individuals. Artistic and creative, they live in a world of hidden meanings and possi ilities. !nly one percent of the population has an INFJ "ersonality #ype, making it the most rare of all the types. INFJs place great importance on having things orderly and systematic in their outer world. #hey put a lot of energy into identifying the est system for getting things done, and constantly define and re$define the priorities in their lives. !n the other hand, INFJs operate within themselves on an intuitive asis which is entirely spontaneous. #hey know things intuitively, without eing a le to pinpoint why, and without detailed knowledge of the su %ect at hand. #hey are usually right, and they usually know it. &onse'uently, INFJs put a tremendous amount of faith into their instincts and intuitions. #his is something of a conflict etween the inner and outer worlds, and may result in the INFJ not eing as organi(ed as other Judging types tend to e. !r we may see some signs of disarray in an otherwise orderly tendency, such as a consistently messy desk. INFJs have uncanny insight into people and situations. #hey get )feelings) a out things and intuitively understand them. As an extreme example, some INFJs report experiences of a psychic nature, such as getting strong feelings a out there eing a pro lem with a loved one, and discovering later that they were in a car accident. #his is the sort of thing that other types may scorn and scoff at, and the INFJ them self does not really understand their intuition at a level which can e ver ali(ed. &onse'uently, most INFJs are protective of their inner selves, sharing only what they choose to share when they choose to share it. #hey are deep, complex individuals, who are 'uite private and typically difficult to understand. INFJs hold ack part of themselves, and can e secretive. *ut the INFJ is as genuinely warm as they are complex. INFJs hold a special place in the heart of people who they are close to, who are a le to see their special gifts and depth of caring. INFJs are concerned for people+s feelings, and try to e gentle to avoid hurting anyone. #hey are very sensitive to conflict, and

cannot tolerate it very well. ,ituations which are charged with conflict may drive the normally peaceful INFJ into a state of agitation or charged anger. #hey may tend to internali(e conflict into their odies, and experience health pro lems when under a lot of stress. *ecause the INFJ has such strong intuitive capa ilities, they trust their own instincts a ove all else. #his may result in an INFJ stu ornness and tendency to ignore other people+s opinions. #hey elieve that they+re right. !n the other hand, INFJ is a perfectionist who dou ts that they are living up to their full potential. INFJs are rarely at complete peace with themselves $ there+s always something else they should e doing to improve themselves and the world around them. #hey elieve in constant growth, and don+t often take time to revel in their accomplishments. #hey have strong value systems, and need to live their lives in accordance with what they feel is right. In deference to the Feeling aspect of their personalities, INFJs are in some ways gentle and easy going. &onversely, they have very high expectations of themselves, and fre'uently of their families. #hey don+t elieve in compromising their ideals. INFJ is a natural nurturer- patient, devoted and protective. #hey make loving parents and usually have strong onds with their offspring. #hey have high expectations of their children, and push them to e the est that they can e. #his can sometimes manifest itself in the INFJ eing hard$nosed and stu orn. *ut generally, children of an INFJ get devoted and sincere parental guidance, com ined with deep caring. In the workplace, the INFJ usually shows up in areas where they can e creative and somewhat independent. #hey have a natural affinity for art, and many excel in the sciences, where they make use of their intuition. INFJs can also e found in service$oriented professions. #hey are not good at dealing with minutia or very detailed tasks. #he INFJ will either avoid such things, or else go to the other extreme and ecome enveloped in the details to the extent that they can no longer see the ig picture. An INFJ who has gone the route of ecoming meticulous a out details may e highly critical of other individuals who are not. #he INFJ individual is gifted in ways that other types are not. .ife is not necessarily easy for the INFJ, ut they are capa le of great depth of feeling and personal achievement.

Jungian functional preference ordering:

/ominant0 Introverted Intuition Auxiliary0 1xtraverted Feeling #ertiary0 Introverted #hinking Inferior0 1xtraverted ,ensing

Personal Growth
"erhaps the most important reali(ation that an individual can make in their 'uest for personal growth is that there is no single formula that defines the path to personal success. 2e all have different goals and priorities, which means that different activities and attitudes will make us feel good a out ourselves. 2e also have different natural strengths and weaknesses that are a part of our inherent personality type. 3ow then, as individuals, can we feel successful in our lives4

Understand What's Important to You

1ach personality type has a different idea of what it means to e successful. ,elf$knowledge is one common goal that will help everyone achieve personal success. ,o many people are hung up on some ody else+s idea of what it means to e successful, and they are unaware of what is truly important to them. #his is completely normal. 2e all have important role$models and influencers in our lives who may have asic values that are 'uite different from our own. If this is the case, it+s important to recogni(e that the discrepancy etween what we have een taught is truly important and what we personally elieve to e truly important is due to a difference in perspective. If we spend our time and effort trying to meet some ody else+s idea of success, and ignore or elittle any conflicting messages from our own psyche, then we will find ourselves exhausted and unhappy. 5eali(ing what is truly important to us is a ma%or step towards achieving personal success.

Recognize Your Weaknesses Without Hiding Behind Them

2hile improving our self$knowledge and reali(ing our true goals can e very li erating, we should not discard the rules of the society in which we live. 2e must recogni(e that other people+s value systems are no less important than our own. And we must recogni(e and accept that we live in a society in which

certain personality types and ehaviors are more suited towards particular tasks. #his is the second key that will open the door towards personal growth. For example, there are situations in which it is more appropriate and effective to show compassion and caring 6Feeling7, rather than impersonal logic 6#hinking7. .ikewise, there are situations that call for using impersonal logic to make a decision, in which the more su %ective viewpoint of the Feeling function is inappropriate and ineffective. "ersons with a preference for Feeling will have a natural advantage over #hinkers in situations that re'uire compassion and awareness of other+s emotions. &onversely, persons with a preference for #hinking will have a natural advantage over Feelers in situations that re'uire the a ility to make a decision ased on impersonal data. As we learn a out our personality type and the types of others, we are empowered with an understanding of why people react differently in different situations. 2hen put into the context of "sychological #ype, we can etter accept and understand people+s ehaviors that are different from ours. #hese insights are extremely useful and powerful to us as individuals. 3owever, if we are concerned with growing as individuals, we must take care not to use personality type as an excuse for our inappropriate ehavior. 2hile it+s powerful and useful to notice that another person+s inappropriate ehavior may e due to their personality type, we cannot use the same reasoning on ourselves. 2e should recogni(e that our personality type has weaknesses, ut we must use that knowledge to con'uer those weaknesses rather than to excuse poor ehavior. 2e cannot e responsi le for other people+s ehavior, ut we can control our own. Accordingly, if we notice that someone seems to e una le to make an impersonal decision that is isolated from human perspective, we should say to ourselves, )Ah ha, here is a Feeler. #his person does not use #hinking well, and that is why they+re ehaving this way.) Yet when we as Feelers are presented with a situation that re'uires an impersonal approach, we should N!# say to ourselves )I am a Feeler, and can+t e expected to make decisions ased purely on impersonal facts and logic.) #his kind of rationali(ation for ehavior is certainly an easy way out of a situation, ut it enforces the weakness, making it weaker and weaker still.

tri!e for Balance

8ost of the weaknesses associated with any given personality type are a result of that type+s dominant function overtaking the personality to the extent that the other functions ecome slaves to the dominant function. Although it is natural for every personality to e ruled y its dominant function, it ecomes a pro lem when the supporting functions are not allowed to develop fully on their own ecause they are too usy )serving the master). In such cases, a personality can ecome 'uite im alanced. A situation in which the dominant function of a personality completely overshadows the other personality functions is analogous to a kingdom that is ruled y an over earing king who re'uires a solute servitude. Imagine such a king sitting down to dinner in his castle. 3e keeps all of his servants running a out to ring him dinner, and re'uires that they serve him fully 6disregarding their own needs7 until he is completed sated. 3is Foreign 8inister, who is expected at an important affair at a neigh oring kingdom, finds himself pouring ale. 3is 8inister of /omestic Affairs, rather than addressing the issue of a failing economy, slices roast turkey. 3is staff gra s food for themselves here and there, ut never get what they really need or want, and are conse'uently unsatisfied, malnourished, and underdeveloped. #he issues that the staff should e taking care of are left undone, ecause they never finish their primary task of serving the king. #he king+s immediate needs are eing met, and so he is tolera ly happy, ut he is an ineffective king. As far as he knows, everything and every ody exists simply to serve him. 3e has no concept of ,uccess eyond his daily needs. ,ince he cannot see eyond his own needs, the entire kingdom suffers. .ikewise, a personality that has developed with a goal of serving the dominant function a ove all other considerations often results in a person who is im alanced. In severe cases, the weaknesses associated with the given type are often 'uite apparent to others, and overshadow the individual+s natural strengths. ,uch a drastic im alance is not common, and may e the result of continuous and extreme stress. 8ost people will experience times in their lives during which they are stressed to the point of serious im alance. "eople who experience this constantly have issues that need to e dealt with, and should seek help. 8uch more commonly, we see individuals who exhi it oth the strengths and weaknesses of their type. It is natural and healthy that each personality type is ruled y a dominant function, and that the other functions support the ruling function. 2e don+t seek to change anyone+s natural self, or to achieve a perfect alance amongst a personality+s functions. *y definition, a kingdom needs a

king in order to exist, and a personality needs a dominant function. 3owever, a kingdom with a well$developed and effective king 6the dominant function7, who has well$trained and educated advisors 6the supporting functions7, will thrive more than the kingdom ruled y a neglectful king who is supported y inexperienced advisors. As we can see, Balance and Success are relative terms. #hey have different meaning for each of the sixteen personality types. !ne statement using these terms is true for all types0 *alance is the key to ,uccess.

"pening the #oor

,o how do we go a out reali(ing what+s truly important to us4 3ow do we recogni(e our weaknesses, and learn not to hide ehind them4 3ow do we ecome alanced4 3ow do we open that magical door that will show us the way to personal growth and success4 #here is no 'uickie scheme that will make you a successful person. "sychological #ype is a powerful aid in our 'uest for excellence, ut it is not the actual solution. It is a model that will help you to expand your understanding of human nature. An improved understanding of yourself and others will help you to find, follow or expand your path. An awareness and acceptance of the fact that one personality function may e more effective than another function in a given situation will help you to understand the relevance of personal growth to your life. &arl Jung identified a process of personal growth that he called indi!iduation, which is essentially the conscious reali(ation of your true self, eyond the $go that is presented y your conscious self. !ur efforts to help people develop themselves is essentially the effort to help them to reali(e that their personal perspectives and conscious ideas are only a small part of who they are, and that the more they try to develop and defend this superficial )self), the further they get away from their true ,elf. #his reali(ation helps a psyche in many concrete ways, and is also a positive step towards promoting a psyche that is open to the process of individuation. For the purposes of making this reali(ation accessi le to the general pu lic, our writings are mostly void of complex theoretical discussion.

INFJ Personal Growth

2hat does Success mean to an INFJ4
"eople with the INFJ personality type are intense and perfectionistic. #hey have deep insights into many aspects of life, and usually have very high standards for their own understanding and accomplishments, as well as those of others. #hey are service$oriented and empathetic to other individuals. #he INFJ strives for the ideal in every aspect of their life. An INFJ+s feeling of success is centered around their own level of understanding and accomplishment, their usefulness or service to others, and the condition of their personal relationships. #he INFJ feels successful when they have used their very deep understanding of something to do a real service for someone. 2e often see INFJ personality types as counselors and teachers, or in the medical and health fields.

Allowing Your INFJ ,trengths to Flourish

As an INFJ, you have gifts that are specific to your personality type that aren+t natural strengths for other types. *y recogni(ing your special gifts and encouraging their growth and development, you will more readily see your place in the world, and e more content with your role. Nearly all INFJs will recogni(e the following characteristics in themselves. #hey should em race and nourish these strengths0

#hey+re extremely insightful, and see things that are not o vious to others. #his a ility to see patterns and meanings in the world can help the INFJ in many different ways. INFJs usually have a great deal of insight into different people and situations. 2hen given a goal or context, an INFJ is a le to generate all kinds of possi ilities. #hey+re a le to see the pro lem from many different angles. #hey understand how others are feeling, and are genuinely concerned with others. #his natural empathy and caring helps to e really effective at helping others through pro lems. In this manner, they make great friends, counselors, teachers, and mates. An INFJ has a )stick to it) attitude. #hey+re not afraid of hard work, and will put forth a great deal of effort towards something that they elieve in. #his persistence will help the INFJ to achieve an identified goal. "erfectionistic and idealistic, they always strive for the est.

9sually intelligent and a le to concentrate and focus, the INFJ can usually grasp difficult ideas and concepts.

INFJs who have a well$developed 1xtraverted Feeling function to complement their dominant Introverted iNtuition will en%oy these very special gifts0

#hey can turn their insightful understanding a out a situation into a successful plan of action. #he INFJ with well$developed %udgment will e a le to grasp and process concepts that are eyond what their natural intelligence appears to e a le to handle. #hey may achieve a level of understanding that makes them appear wise. #he INFJ+s perfectionism and idealism, when com ined with their empathy and genuine concern for others, can cause them to e true servants for people in some fashion. #hey may e great doctors or ministers or counselors. If they have also achieved a good amount of life wisdom, they can ecome powerful forces, such as Jesus 6INFJ7 and 8ahatma :andhi 6INFJ7.

"otential "ro lem Areas

2ith any gift of strength, there is an associated weakness. 2ithout ) ad), there would e no )good). 2ithout )difficult), there would e no )easy). 2e value our strengths, ut we often curse and ignore our weaknesses. #o grow as a person and get what we want out of life, we must not only capitali(e upon our strengths, ut also face our weaknesses and deal with them. #hat means taking a hard look at our personality type+s potential pro lem areas. INFJs are rare and intelligent people with many special gifts. #his should e kept in mind as you read some of the more negative material a out INFJ weaknesses. 5emem er that these weaknesses are natural. 2e offer this information to enact positive change, rather than as latant criticism. 2e want you to grow into your full potential, and e the happiest and most successful person that you can ecome. 8ost of the weaker characteristics that are found in INFJs are due to their dominant function 6Introverted iNtuition7 overtaking their personality to the point that the other forces in their personality exist merely to serve the purposes of Introverted iNtuition. In such cases, an INFJ may show some or all of the following weaknesses in varying degrees0

8ay e unaware 6and sometimes uncaring7 of how they come across to others 8ay 'uickly dismiss input from others without really considering it 8ay apply their %udgment more often towards others, rather than towards themselves 2ith their a ility to see an issue from many sides, they may always find others at fault for any pro lems in their lives 8ay have unrealistic and;or unreasona le expectations of others 8ay e intolerant of weaknesses in others 8ay elieve that they+re always right 8ay e o sessive and passionate a out details that may e unimportant to the ig picture 8ay e cuttingly derisive and sarcastic towards others 8ay have an intense and 'uick temper 8ay e tense, wound up, have high lood pressure and find it difficult to relax 8ay hold grudges, and have difficulty forgiving people 8ay e wishy$washy and unsure how to act in situations that re'uire 'uick decision making 8ay have difficulty communicating their thoughts and feelings to others 8ay see so many tangents everywhere that they can+t stay focused on the ottom line or the ig picture

1xplanation of "ro lems

8ost of the pro lems descri ed a ove are a result of Introverted iNtuition overtaking the INFJ+s personality to the point that all of the other functions ecome slaves to Introverted iNtuition. A healthy personality needs to have a good alance etween its dominant and auxiliary functions. For an INFJ, the dominant Introverted iNtuition needs to e well$supported y the auxiliary 1xtraverted Feeling function. If 1xtraverted Feeling exists only to support the desires of Introverted iNtuition, then neither function is eing used to its potential. Introverted iNtuition is a personality function that constantly gathers information, and sees everything from many different perspectives. As the dominant player in a personality, it has the effect of constantly om arding the psyche with new information to consider. Introverted iNtuition is sort of like a framework for understanding that exists in the mind. As something is perceived, it is melded into the existing intuitive framework. If an entirely new piece of information is perceived y the Introverted iNtuitive, that person must

redefine their entire framework of reference. ,o, Introverted iNtuitives are constantly taking in information a out the world that needs to e processed in a relatively lengthy manner in order to e understood. #hat presents 'uite a challenge to the INFJ. It+s not unusual for an INFJ to feel overwhelmed with all of the things that he or she needs to consider in order to fully understand an idea or situation. 2hen Introverted iNtuition dominates the INFJ such that the other functions cannot serve their own purposes, we find the INFJ cutting off information that it needs to consider. If the psyche is presented with information that looks anything like something that Introverted iNtuition has processed in the past, it uses 1xtraverted Feeling to 'uickly re%ect that information. #he psyche uses 1xtraverted Feeling to re%ect the ideas, rather than taking the information into its intuitive framework, and therefore potentially causing that framework to e reshaped and redefined. 9sing 1xtraverted Feeling in this manner may effectively serve the immediate needs of Introverted iNtuition, ut it is not ideal. It causes the INFJ to not consider information that may e useful or critical in developing a real understanding of an issue. It may cause the INFJ to come off as too strongly opinionated or sno ish to others. #he etter use of 1xtraverted Feeling for an INFJ would e to use it to assess the INFJ+s rich insights and weigh them against the external world. 2hen the INFJ personality uses 1xtraverted Feeling to cut off incoming information, rather than to %udge internal intuitions, it is effectively cheating itself. It+s like getting the answers to a test without having to really understand the 'uestions. It+s easier to get the answer right away, rather than to have to figure everything out. For the INFJ, who has a tremendous amount of information and )studying) that needs to e done, it+s very tempting to take shortcuts. 8ost INFJs will do this to some extent. #he real pro lems occur when an INFJ personality has ecome so im alanced that its owner is extremely self$important and rarely consider anyone else+s opinions or ideas.

#o grow as an individual, the INFJ needs to focus on applying their %udgment to things only after they have gone through their intuition. In other words, the INFJ needs to consciously try not to use their %udgment to dismiss ideas prematurely. 5ather, they should use their %udgment against their own ideas. !ne cannot effectively %udge something that they don+t understand. #he INFJ

needs to take things entirely into their intuition in order to understand them. It may e necessary to give your intuition enough time to work through the new information so that it can re uild its glo al framework of understanding. INFJs need to focus on using their %udgment not to dismiss ideas, ut rather to support their intuitive framework. An INFJ who is concerned with personal growth will pay close attention to the su %ect of their %udgments, and their motivation for making %udgments. Are they %udging something external to them self, or are they %udging something that they have sifted through their intuition4 Is the motivation for %udging something to e a le to understand its usefulness in the world, or to dismiss it4 #oo often, an INFJ will %udge something without properly understanding it, and with the intention of dismissing it. ,eek first to understand, then to %udge.

.iving 3appily in our 2orld as an INFJ

,ome INFJs have difficulty fitting into our society. #heir pro lems are generally associated with not knowing 6or caring7 how they come across to others, and with having unreasona le expectations for others+ ehaviors. *oth of these issues stem from using 1xtraverted Feeling primarily to dismiss external ideas, rather than to sort through their own intuitions. An INFJ who uses 1xtraverted Feeling in this diminished manner may ecome so strongly opinionated that they form rigid and unreasona le expectations for others. #hey may feel so strongly a out things that they ecome very passionate and agitated when they feel that something has gone wrong. In these cases, it+s not uncommon for the INFJ to express their displeasure with iting sarcasm. #hey ecome so emotionally upset that they are generally not aware of how their ehavior comes across to others. 1ven if the conse'uences of their attitude and ehavior is pointed out to them, they may e agitated to the point that they don+t care. #his kind of situation can e devastating to the INFJ on many levels, and should e avoided. #here isn+t much that can e done once the INFJ has reached the point where they are too upset to care a out others, ut the INFJ can prevent this pro lem from occurring y ensuring that they never get to that point. 3ow can you, as an INFJ, ensure that you won+t get that upset4 It pro a ly seems to you that these kinds of upsets are caused y external circumstances and situations. 2ell, that+s not really true. It+s true that things will happen over which you have no control. *ut you certainly have control over how you perceive these things, or more appropriately, how you <%udge< these things.

,pecific suggestions0

#ake care to listen to someone+s idea entirely efore you pass %udgment on it. Ask 'uestions if necessary. /o whatever it takes to make sure that you understand the idea. #ry not to egin %udging anything a out the idea until you have understood it entirely. *efore you egin talking to another person, pause for a moment and look at that person. #ake in that person+s attitude and feelings at that moment. *e aware of the person with whom you+re speaking. If you ecome upset, walk away immediately. /! N!# express anger. 2hen you get angry, you lose. After you have calmed down, apologi(e for leaving and continue with what you were doing. #ry to identify the personality type of everyone that you encounter fre'uently in your life. 5emem er that people with the ,ensing preference need to e communicated with in a direct, concise manner. ,peak plainly and simply with ,ensors, giving )yes) or )no) answers. #ry to e on good terms with all people, even those that you consider eneath you. #ry to understand that every ody has something to offer.

#en 5ules to .ive *y to Achieve INFJ ,uccess

=. %eed Your trengths& /o things that allow your rilliant intuition and service$oriented manner to flourish. >. %ace Your Weaknesses& ,ee your weaknesses for what they are, and seek to overcome them. 1specially, strive to use your %udgment against your internal ideas and intuitions, rather than as a means of disregarding other people+s ideas. ?. Talk Through Your Thoughts' You need to step through your intuitions in order to put them into perspective. :ive yourself time to do this, and take advantage of discussing ideas with others. You+ll find externali(ing your internal intuitions to e a valua le exercise. @. Take in $!er(thing' /on+t dismiss ideas prematurely ecause you don+t respect the person generating the ideas, or ecause you think you already know it all. After all, every ody has something to offer, and no ody knows everything. ,teven &ovey says it so well when he says0 ),eek first to understand, and then to e understood.) A. When You )et *ngr(+ You ,ose' Your passion and intensity are strong assets, ut can e very harmful if you allow yourself to fall into the )Anger #rap). 5emem er that Anger is destructive to your personal relationships. 2ork through your anger efore you impress it upon others, or you will likely find yourself alone. /isagreements and

disappointments can only e handled effectively in a non$personal and dispassionate manner. B. -eep Your $(e on the Big .icture 2atch out for your tendency to ecome o sessed with details. If you find yourself feeling very, very strongly a out a small detail, take a ig step ack and make sure that you can still see the goal. You+re not going to get there if you get mired in the details. C. Be *ccounta/le for Yourself' /on+t lame the pro lems in your life on other people. .ook inwardly for solutions. No one has more control over your life than you have. D. Be Hum/le' Judge yourself at least as harshly as you %udge others. E. *ssume the Best' /on+t distress yourself and others y dwelling on the dark side of everything. Just as there is a positive charge for every negative charge, there is a light side to every dark side. 5emem er that positive situations are created y positive attitudes. 1xpect the est, and the est will come forward. =F. Rela0& /o yourself a favor and learn how to effectively unwind. :et exercise and restful sleep. #ake vacations. 1ngage in relaxing activities. #ake care of yourself and your loved ones y learning to let go of your passion and intensity for a respite.

INFJ Relationships
INFJs are warm and affirming people who are usually also deep and complex. #hey+re likely to seek out and promote relationships that are intense and meaningful. #hey tend to e perfectionists, and are always striving for the 9ltimate 5elationship. For the most part, this is a positive feature, ut sometimes works against the INFJ if they fall into the ha it of moving from relationship to relationship, always in search of a more perfect partner. In general, the INFJ is a deeply warm and caring person who is highly invested in the health of their close relationships, and puts forth a lot of effort to make them positive. #hey are valued y those close to them for these special 'ualities. #hey seek long$term, lifelong relationships, although they don+t always find them.

INFJ Strengths

2arm and affirming y nature /edicated to achieving the ultimate relationship ,ensitive and concerned for others+ feelings 9sually have good communication skills, especially written #ake their commitments very seriously, and seek lifelong relationships 3ave very high expectations for themselves and others 6 oth a strength and weakness7 :ood listeners Are a le to move on after a relationship has ended 6once they+re sure it+s over7



#endency to hold ack part of themselves Not good with money or practical day$to$day life necessities 1xtreme dislike of conflict and criticism 3ave very high expectations for themselves and others 6 oth a strength and weakness7 3ave difficulty leaving a ad relationship

INFJs as Partners

"To love means to open ourselves to the negative as well as the positive - to grief, sorrow, and disappointment as well as to joy, fulfillment, and an intensity of consciousness we did not know was possible before." -- ollo !ay INFJs are warm, considerate partners who feel great depth of love for their partners. #hey en%oy showing this love, and want to receive affirmation ack from their mates. #hey are perfectionists, constantly striving to achieve the "erfect 5elationship. #his can sometimes e frustrating to their mates, who may feel put upon y the INFJs demanding perfectionism. 3owever, it may also e greatly appreciated, ecause it indicates a sincere commitment to the relationship, and a depth of caring which is not usually present in other types. INFJs view intimacy as a nearly spiritual experience. #hey em race the opportunity to ond heart and soul with their mates. As service$oriented individuals, it+s very important to them that their mates are happy. Although two well$developed individuals of any type can en%oy a healthy relationship, INFJ+s natural partner is the 1N#", or the 1NF". INFJ+s dominant function of Introverted Intuition is est matched with a personality type that is dominated y 1xtraverted Intuition.

INFJs as Parents
""ou are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth... #et your bending in the archer$s hand be for gladness%

&or even as 'e loves the arrow that flies, so 'e loves also the bow that is stable." -- (ahlil )ibran INFJs usually make warm and caring parents. #heir goal is to help their children ecome adults who know the difference etween right and wrong, and who are independent, growth$oriented individuals. Along the path to that goal they are generally very warm and caring, and are likely to treat their children as individuals who have a voice in family decisions. #hey want their children to e a le to think for themselves, and make the right decisions. #hey also can e 'uite demanding on their children, and may have very high expectations for their ehavior. Although they are generally soft$spoken and gentle, they may ecome stu orn and sharp$tongued at times when their expectations aren+t met, or when under a lot of stress. INFJs take their parenting role with ultimate seriousness. #hey will make sacrifices for the sake of their children without a second thought, and without remorse. "assing on their values to their children is a serious priority in their lives. &hildren of INFJs remem er their parents fondly as warm, patient, and inspirational.

INFJs as Friends
Although the INFJ is likely to put friends ehind their :od and their families in terms of importance, they do value their friendships. As idealists who have strong value systems, INFJs seek authenticity and depth in their close relationships, and especially value people who can see and appreciate the INFJ for who they are and what they stand for. #he INFJ is likely to spend a lot of time sociali(ing with family mem ers. If they are religious, they pro a ly are social with mem ers of their religious community. After that, the INFJ may have friends represented from any of the personality types. #hey are usually extremely intuitive individuals, who will have no patience for anyone they feel is dishonest or corrupt. #hey+ll have no interest in eing around these kinds of people. All kinds of people are drawn towards the INFJ. #hey are usually 'uite popular, although they may e unaware of it themselves, ecause they don+t place a lot of importance on it.

#he INFJ is valued y their close friends for their warmth and consideration, their new and interesting ways of looking at things, and for their a ility to inspire and motivate others to e the est that they can e. genuine article that they are.

"areers for INFJ Personalit# $#pes

2hether you+re a young adult trying to find your place in the world, or a not$ so$young adult trying to find out if you+re moving along the right path, it+s important to understand yourself and the personality traits which will impact your likeliness to succeed or fail at various careers. It+s e'ually important to understand what is really important to you. 2hen armed with an understanding of your strengths and weaknesses, and an awareness of what you truly value, you are in an excellent position to pick a career which you will find rewarding. INFJs generally have the following traits0

Intuitively understand people and situations Idealistic 3ighly principled &omplex and deep Natural leaders ,ensitive and compassionate towards people ,ervice$oriented Future$oriented Galue deep, authentic relationships 5eserved a out expressing their true selves /islike dealing with details unless they enhance or promote their vision &onstantly seeking meaning and purpose in everything &reative and visionary Intense and tightly$wound &an work logically and rationally $ use their intuition to understand the goal and work ackwards towards it

#he INFJ is a special individual who needs more out of a career than a %o . #hey need to feel as if everything they do in their lives is in sync with their strong value systems $ with what they elieve to e right. Accordingly, the INFJ should choose a career in which they+re a le to live their daily lives in accordance with their deeply$held principles, and which supports them in their life 'uest to e doing something meaningful. ,ince INFJs have such strong

value systems, and persistent intuitive visions which lend them a sense of )knowing), they do est in positions in which they are leaders, rather than followers. Although they can happily follow individuals who are leading in a direction which the INFJ fully supports, they will very unhappy following in any other situation. #he following list of professions is uilt on our impressions of careers which would e especially suita le for an INFJ. It is meant to e a starting place, rather than an exhaustive list. #here are no guarantees that any or all of the careers listed here would e appropriate for you, or that your est career match is among those listed. Possi%le "areer Paths for the INFJ&

&lergy ; 5eligious 2ork #eachers 8edical /octors ; /entists Alternative 3ealth &are "ractitioners, i.e. &hiropractor, 5eflexologist "sychologists "sychiatrists &ounselors and ,ocial 2orkers 8usicians and Artists "hotographers &hild &are ; 1arly &hildhood /evelopment