What Every

Ma and Pa
Should Know
Before Trek

Section One
Basic Answers
What is Trek 2014?

Simply put, Trek 2014 for the Gig Harbor Stake is a 5 day long Challenge Program.

What is a Challenge Program?

A Challenge Program uses experiential learning to improve ones own positive self-concept; it is
about personal discovery. In the eternal perspective, it can be a powerful time in which the participants
can catch the gospel. It also aids groups to improve interpersonal relationships within their own
settings. This can be a group of Corporate Officers, Young Women at a girls camp, a Boy Scout troop,
a ward of Relief Society sisters or the simple trek family unit.

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints who are familiar with the Church
owned recreational properties in the state of Washington, we usually refer to a Challenge Program
simply as the Ropes Course. As the Gig Harbor Stake, we are using this model for our basis in
providing a Youth Conference with the Pioneer Trek theme. From here on out, we will refer to the
Challenge Program simply as Trek.

What is Experiential Learning?

Experiential Learning is the process of making meaning from direct experience, i.e. learning
from experience. The experience can be staged or left open. Aristotle once said, For the things we
have to learn before we can do them, we learn by doing them. Trek is based on an experiential learning
model.

Although a successful Trek will include some skill building, remember this; skills and
experience are two separate issues. Skills are taught through instruction, repetition and demonstration.
Experience isnt taught, it is accumulated.

When you add the Holy Spirit to an experiential learning setting, you literally can provide an
atmosphere where a spiritual experience can take place in the lives of each participant. As a Ma and
Pa, you will want to bring the Spirit with you. If not, your success will not be as great.

Our end goal is to help our participants accumulate spiritual experiences in a meaningful setting.





What concepts make up the framework for Experiential Learning?

There are three areas or concepts that should be considered when teaching through experiences.

Behavioral: Stimulating new behavior that is reinforced positively through experiential learning. For
example, deciding to pray more often or more effectively because of the trek experience.

Affective: Positive valuing built through experiential activities develops self concept, in a designed
environment of safety, love, and self-esteem. Without the psycho-babble, this means getting the family
members to truly believe the concept I can do hard things.

Spiritual: Revelation and/or confirmation of spiritual truths.

What are the Key Components?


There are four key components. They are known as Bedrock, Briefing, Sequencing, and Reflection.

Bedrock is the foundation of Trek, much a Mission Statement for a company.

Briefing deals with preparing the family for the series of physical and sometimes emotional challenges
they will face.

Sequencing is the order of activities in which family members need to participate to meet the
challenges successfully.

Reflection consists of mentally/spiritually processing the events.













Section Two
Bedrock:
The Mission Statement


The Bedrock is the foundation of the Trek family experience and deals with each component of
our Mission Statement for the Youth Conference.

The Gig Harbor Stake Youth Conference will be a meaningful and spiritual experience for the
youth, the trek leaders and those involved in the preparation. We know that God will bless the
participants abundantly. A setting of love will be created that shall invite the Spirit and soften and
impress many to seek the Lord deeper than before. When the participants put forth their all, they will
gain a stronger testimony, learn to appreciate the pioneers, increase self-esteem, appreciate their families
more and gain new friends within the trek family.

Overall, we would like to foster an environment where family members can relate real-life
experiences to how a loving Heavenly Father deals with His children. To do this, we have also set forth
5 objectives for our youth

1. Have a fun experience during Youth Conference
2. Experience some of the excitement and challenges faced by the early pioneers
3. Build personal faith and testimony
4. Create close friendships within the stake
5. Recognize how you are truly pioneers today


Section Three
Briefing:
Instructions, Setting the Tone
and Establishing Family Rules
and Expectations


The process of briefing begins when the participants arrive. The briefing portion gives
instructions, sets the tone for the rest of the Youth Conference and provides structure through family rules and
expectations.

Instructions

Instructions can be given at the beginning of a day, event or hardship. We want to be careful to
only give instructions regarding safety or rules of the task.

Set the Tone

This process begins when you take your family to your designated room for an hour before the
train arrives. There are three main points that you want to get across to the group before you begin. These
are also points you will want to re-iterate each morning of Trek.

1. You will be safe during the entire time you are on Trek. No one will go hungry or thirsty.
2. You will not learn or change without effort.
3. Seek answers from your interactions with the group and the Holy Ghost.

Family Rules and Expectations

Setting the tone for Trek should involve rules and expectations. Lead the youth in a discussion about
what the rules and expectations should be. As they are being chosen, make sure each family member
understands the rule in the same way as the Ma and Pa understand it. Here is a sample set with a brief
explanation of each:

1. Goal setting
2. Safety first
3. No Discounting
4. Support each other
5. Be willing to take a risk
6. Let it go
7. Have fun

Goal Setting An agreement to participate in the family and to encourage family and individual goals

Goal setting is a dynamic process, with amendments and additions taking place for the life of the
group. Thus, it is agreed that goal setting will be ongoing. Members are asked to take part in that process, not
only in terms of their own goals, but also in terms of the goals of their family members.

Safety first An agreement to adhere to certain physical and psychological safety guidelines

These guidelines must be discussed and agreed upon by the group or they will be meaningless.
This is an important part of the process for groups to engage in. Participants need to follow the directions
they are given by the Ma and Pa and by each other. Part of safety involves listening. Participants have to
listen to instructions, listen to each other, and listen to themselves in order to be safe.

No Discounting An agreement to increase awareness of devaluing or discounting oneself or others

Participants must make a direct and conscious effort to confront and work toward changing this
behavior. Behavior change must take place in an honest, non-coercive atmosphere. Only after self
examination can discussions regarding behavior change be made. Adherence to the rule means that
participants will consider what is being said and indicated, and agree to do something about that something
if it makes sense.

Support each other An agreement to give and receive honest feedback

Each participant agrees to listen and try to integrate honest feedback when his/her behavior does
not match the behavior identified as a goal. Similarly, each person agrees to give honest feedback to others
when their behaviors do not match identified goals. This involves caring enough about oneself and others to
communicate in a fashion that will be productive and facilitate growth. Inherent in this process is the belief
that every family member has value and by virtue of that value has a right and responsibility to give and
receive open and honest feedback. Withholding or refusing to listen to constructive criticism may be viewed
as an example of discounting (devaluing) ones own self or others.

Be willing to take a risk An agreement to take appropriate risks when called upon

Learning how to take an appropriate risk is a skill that can be developed by participants. Growth
in taking risks occurs when a person finds that edge where they are uncomfortable and understands what is
happening and finds the inner control that helps them work through that moment. Risks come in many forms,
not just physical, but also emotional and sometimes spiritual as well. Trek experiences can result in applying
learned risk-taking skills to other parts of their lives.

Let it go An agreement to make an effort to let go of negative interpersonal issues that may develop

This is important because the sometimes necessary intensity of group and individual interactions
and confrontations can, though leading to resolution and change, leave unresolved interpersonal residue.
Making an effort to let go of those residual feelings provides everyone with a fresh new start. This is a
necessary component of the rules.

Have fun - An agreement to just have fun

Self-explanatory


Thats just one of those questions - An agreement to not ask questions about the future during trek

This rule is NOT optional. Your family will have bunches of questions before we begin and
along the trail that involve future events. We do not want to discuss any of the events or conditions of
the trek before they actually occur. Since we do not want to lie or mislead the youth, your response to
these questions need to be the same. You as a Ma and Pa will simply answer, Im sorry, but thats just
one of those questions. Explain to the youth in your family that this will be your only answer. Give
them an example. Tell them if they ask things like: When do we get there? or Is this all we are going
to eat?, your answer will be the same.Im sorry, but thats just one of those questions.

The participants do not know when they are going to stop, nor when or what they are going to
eat. This is similar to our Fathers association with us as mortals. We really do not know what life has
in store for us. He does not normally tell us what will happen to us tomorrow or next year. At times, it
is better that we do not know. Of course, it is difficult to think of eternal principles when one is
hungry or tired, so we usually wait to draw this parallel or analogy until later (this is called processing).








Section Four
Sequencing:
Putting All Things in Order


Sequencing the Activities

Sequencing is the correct selection of activities at any given time for any given group. Lead up
activities are a key to sequencing. Without appropriate lead up, you can jump into activities that the family is
not ready for. Lead up activities provides you with time to establish rapport, have fun, and deal with the basic
group process. Lead up activities also establishes the fact that ultimately the family is the issue, not whether
the family is able to accomplish a certain goal or challenge in a certain amount of time. The family will make
the experience successful.

By using sequencing properly, the family can form in a gradual, non-threatening manner, while at the
same time, preparing the participants with the skills necessary for a successful and safe day. The following is
the suggested sequence to follow. Listed under each heading is a brief description, then a short list of
examples.

I. Ice Breakers
These activities serve to loosen up a group, get them acquainted, start them laughing, and get
them familiar with each others names. Use your time at the Train Depot to accomplish this section.
Then suggest ways the family can continue this process on the train to Iowa City.

Examples: Name Game, Name Train

II. De-inhibitizers
De-inhibitizer activities get the group to let go, do something out of the ordinary, and gradually
start to cross barriers of touch; for instance, doing a Group Hug before getting on the train will help.
Consider playing Lap Sit or Knee Jive Wednesday morning as part of your Morning Routine.

Examples: Group Hug, Lap Sit, Knee Jive

III. Trust Building
Without trust in the family, both physically and emotionally, not many lasting changes can or
will occur. Building this trust before doing a hard initiative activity, like the Hard Rope Pull,
Womens Pull or even conquering the first really hard hill on Wednesday morning, is essential.

Example: Willow in the Wind

IV. Initiative Activities
These activities require initiative on the part of the participant and/or family. During Trek, these
are called Hardships. You may also supply a few initiative activities of your own for your family.
This could become part of Family Home Evening or other times during the day where you need a
break. They may involve the use of all elements below, or just a few.

A. Trust and Empathy
B. Communication
C. Decision-making/Problem-solving
D. Social and/or Personal responsibility

Examples: A Complete Change







Section Five
Reflection:
Processing the Event

One of the great strengths of the Pioneer Trek program is that the youth become mentally and
spiritually, as well as physically, involved. Reflection is a process for reflecting on this experience. This
process is the end of a three-part cycle: briefing, activity, and reflection. If at the end of a day, we were to
look at our family and say, Tell me how you feel and how this is going to affect the rest of your life, we
would probably get a resounding, Okay, and I dont know. We need a process to get to these points.

As a Ma or Pa, you will have the opportunity to conduct this family activity called Reflection. It is an
essential part of the Trek experience, and its success will, to a great extent, make the difference between a
good and a bad experience for the participants. Usually, you will follow the same general guidelines for each
session.

Reflecting is a lot like a family council. It is the exchange of spiritual insights by the members of the
group. It provides a vehicle to internalize the gospel as its principles are related to various Trek activities.

A good reflection session does not happen automatically; it requires considerable preparation and
reflection on your part. As you participate in Trek, keep in mind the events and how they relate to gospel
principles. This offers the youth a chance to ponder what is going on both spiritually and physically and how
it affects everyday life.

Remember that the youth should have their agency and not be forced into a situation where they feel
they have to share their feelings. We want them to remember the spirit rather than leave feeling embarrassed
or mad because they were forced to talk.

For many, the processing of an event (reflection) will be a new experience. Try to encourage everyone
to share, but do not force anyone to do it. After you ask a question, you should sit back and listen. After each
participant responds, give that individual some positive re-enforcement. Some phrases you could use are:
Good, I see what you mean or That was a great parallel. Try to be sincere in each of your compliments,
you do not want them to start to sound insincere or forced. Practice some phrases at home with your own
family before Trek. See how many different validation phrases you can come up with that feel natural to you.

Sometimes you will have to ask additional questions to help the participants think about what has
happened to them, or to help them truly understand their feelings. Dont try to force their thoughts into your
own pre-determined-right-answer mold. The sessions will be much more effective and the participants may
just surprise you with their insights. Part of the value of the experience is that the participants learn
individualized lessons.

There are four parts to reflection. They each have a nick name to help you remember the order of
things: What, Gut, So What, and Now What. Another way you could chose to remember them is with the
Four F Words: Facts, Feeling, Findings and Future. Here is an overview of the four sections.

What or Facts
The first section deals with the things your family did during either one event or a series of them. Start
by asking What things did we do physically during trek? The list will sound something likepulled,
pushed, sweated, walked, got blisters, laughed, etc. Do not let this part slide into the emotional side of what
they were feeling. Keep it strictly to things likeworked together, held hands, tripped on my skirt, etc. This
helps the family remember events and lets them relive some body memories. Try to explore as many of the
aspects of the day or event as possible.

Another way of doing this is through the use of a game called Hold it! Have someone in the group
start telling the story of what just happened, in the order it happened. When another participant feels they
missed something, or has not explained it thoroughly, then that participant yells Hold it! and takes over the
telling of the event. Keep this up as long as it takes to get the story out. As the leader, you may want to make
a rule that every participant must tell a part before you end the session.

Examples of What or Fact Questions: What did you do? What happened? What did you see, feel, hear
or taste? What was the most difficult part of the day? Easiest?

Gut or Feelings
It is now time start talking about individual feelings. One way to get this portion going is to start with
the person on your right and have each person respond to this question, If you could choose one word to
describe how you felt during _______, what would it be? Then let everyone else who wants to add more
words to the list do so. You could also then ask a certain person what they meant by using the word they did.
Continue in this vein, probing deeper and changing the word or topic when necessary. Remember to validate
comments. All sorts of emotions could come from this discussion. Ask them What part of the day did you
feel that way?

Encourage the participants to express their feelings, both positive and negative. When an individual
expresses their true feelings, they will be open to new ideas and feelings conveyed by others. Promote
honesty and sincerity. Do not let participants laugh at each other or talk while someone else is sharing. You
should listen carefully to each participant. Your eye contact means a great deal to them and your responses
determine how the rest of the group acts. Pay attention to each member of the group. You are working with
children of God.

Everyone has Primary and Secondary emotions. A Primary emotion is what is felt first, as a first
response to a situation. Thus, if we are threatened, we may feel fear. When we hear of a death, we may feel
sadness. They are unthinking, instinctive responses that we have. Typical Primary emotions include fear,
anger, sadness and happiness (although it is worth noting that these can also be felt as secondary emotions).

The problem sometimes with Primary emotions is that they disappear as fast as they appear. Their
replacement by Secondary emotions complicates the situation, making it difficult to understand what is really
going on. Primary emotions are ostensibly in place to help us. But our modern world is defined by conflicting
messages, values and judgments. What psychoanalysts call the super ego is the collection of norms, taboos,
morals, and rules for living that you have been storing away since you were a baby. The super ego, just like
the Primary emotions, can act like a road map to help you navigate the world by unconsciously telling you
which thoughts and behaviors are appropriate and which are not. Every culture and family is different in this
regard. If the Primary emotion you are having syncs up with social values and norms as well as what you
experienced as acceptable in our family of origin, there probably wont be any conflict. However, when what
you feel goes against the unspoken rules you have internalized, you will place a value judgment up that
emotion, which will in turn create a new emotion, called the Secondary emotion.

Secondary emotions appear after Primary emotions. They may be caused directly by them, for example
where the fear of a threat turns to anger that fuels the body for a fight reaction. They may also come from
more complex chains of thinking. Secondary emotions can cause a lot of needless distress in your life. They
are usually a result of conscious or unconscious value judgments you place upon your primary emotions.
Secondary emotions may be simple feelings or may be a mix as more emotions join the fray.

If you want to truly understand what the youth in your family are feeling, look for the Primary emotions.
Do not blindly accept the emotion you see as the Primary emotion, but try to find out what may have come
first. The Secondary emotions give you a picture of the persons mental processing of the Primary emotion.
Question them, slowing down their mental process, to determine the internal reasoning as to why they came to
feel the Secondary emotions. This will often be unconscious and can be as big a surprise to them as it is to
you.

CAUTION: Occasionally, a group member will be very open, honest and sincere about another member
of the group who, perhaps, did not give 100% in the activity being discussed. If this type of situation arises, it
is important to take control and let them know that the purpose of reflection is to express personal insights and
feelings about oneself, but not to criticize, judge or blame others.

Examples of Gut or Feelings Questions: What one word describes how you felt? What were your
Primary reactions? What were your Secondary reactions?

So What or Findings
Now that you have exhausted what you did physically and how you felt doing it, invite them to think of
a parallel to life, their relationship with their Father in Heaven, their families, or any gospel principle.

Mention that while they are organizing their thoughts, you would like to go first. You may use any
number of powerful parallels that have to do with the event. For example, 1) life is much easier when we pull
together, 2) you have to keep your momentum or you wont make it or 3) trusting in others makes the load
lighter. This is the general idea.

Remember that this time is for sharing and expressing feelings and ideas about the experience, life and
the gospel. Your responsibility is to initiate the sharing. You can do this by asking thought-provoking
questions, or, at times, sharing your own feelings.

Do not try to force the parallels. The participants should come up with as many as possible. Remember
that this is not a time to preach. It is the participants turn to teach themselves. It is often difficult to
remember what someone else says, but the participants will remember what they themselves share.

Examples of So What or Findings Questions: What did you learn about yourself through this activity?
Why is (life skill) important in your daily life? How does what you learned relate to other parts of your life?



Now What or Future
In this last and most important part of reflection, you need to tie the entire Trek experience together.
Changes will have occurred in their lives, but they will not be real changes unless they occur in their lives at
home also. The goal of this portion is to help the participants realize what changes have occurred and to talk
about ways of progressing even more.

You may want to start the discussion by saying something like this. We have had a wonderful day
together. We have laughed and cried and became the best of friends. We have all changed a little. But the
whole experience will be worthless if we do not go home better people than we were when we came. The real
challenge here was not physical, but rather what will occur when we get home to our families and real life.
As you look back on these events and think about the future, what are some things we can do to make our
lives better?

What you are really doing is setting goals. Try to synthesize all the comments made by the members of
the family into several easy-to-remember goals. Each group member will come up with different goals, but it
is important that the participants themselves come up with the goals. Then have them write these goals down
if possible.

At this time, you might also want to challenge them to do certain things. By now, they should look up to
you and respect you, so they will take what you say very seriously. Offer them a challenge to keep. Then
express your love for them and bear your testimony of the things that have been learned today that can draw
us closer to our Heavenly Father if we will let them.

Examples of Now What or Future Questions: How can you apply what you learned to a new situation?
How will you act differently in the future? How could you apply impressions from the Holy ghost felt through
this event in the future?

Sample Session Number One Might Look Like This
A. You sit the family in a circle. No one should be on the outside, nor on the inside, everyone should be
facing in towards the center. Each person should sit close to the one next to him. This lends a feeling of
belonging and togetherness to the experience. Equally important, it permits each person to look into the
eyes of the other participants. Be sure that you are in a comfortable place.

B. After the circle is formed, explain that you would like each of them to think about the Wednesday
hard Rope Pull. Invite them to think of a parallel to their life, their relationship with their Father in
heaven, their own families, or any gospel principle.

C. Mention that while they are organizing their thoughts, you would like to go first. You may use any
number of powerful parallels that have to with the handcart pull. For example, pulling a handcart over a
rock is a lot like overcoming the trial in your life. Its a lot easier when we pull together. And you have
to keep your momentum or you wont make it.

D. Remember that this is a time for sharing and expressing feelings and ideas about the experience, life
and the gospel. Your responsibility is to initiate the sharing. You can do this by asking thought-
provoking questions, or at times, by sharing some of your own feelings. However, if you just open the
time up for discussion, you may have complete silence, so you need to structure the sharing a little.

E. One way to get them going is to start at one end of the circle and have each participant respond in
turn to the question; if you could choose one word to describe how you felt today, what would it be?
Some of them will be very negative, and some positive. Next you might ask certain individuals why they
said what they did. You can continue this process, probing deeper and changing the topic where
necessary.

F. Dont try to force the parallels. The participants should come up with them. Remember that this isnt
a time to preach to the youth-it is their turn to teach themselves. Its often very difficult to remember
what someone else says, but the youth will be able to remember what they themselves share

G. For many of the youth this will be a new experience. Try to encourage everyone to share, but dont
force anyone to do it. After you ask a question you should sit back and listen. After each youth responds
you should give some positive reinforcement like that was a great parallel, or Good, I can see what
you mean However dont overdo the compliments or else they will become forced and insincere.

H. Sometimes you will have to ask additional questions to help the youth think about what has happened
to them, or to help them truly understand their feelings. However, you shouldnt ask pointed questions
that look for specific answers. If you dont try to force their thoughts into your own predetermined
right answer mold, the session will be much more effective, and they will surprise you with their
insights. You will learn something new about the gospel each time you conduct a session. Part of the
value of the experience is that the participants learn individualized lessons.

I. Watch out for overzealous adult members of the family group. Sometimes we are so used to teaching
that we never give the youth a chance to learn. Adult members of the group should be allowed to
participate in the sharing, but the youth shouldnt be given a larger amount of time than any other
member of the family. Be sensitive to their needs, but remember that they are participants in the
experience along with the youth.

J. Encourage the participants to express their feelings, both positive and negative. When an individual
expresses his true feelings, he will be open to new ideas and feelings conveyed by others. Promote
honesty and sincerity. Dont let the participants laugh at each other or talk while someone else is
sharing. You should listen carefully to each participant. Your eye contact means a great deal to them and
your responses determine how the rest of the group acts. Pay attention to each member of the family;
you are working with children of God.

K. It doesnt matter if the parallel the youth draw are 180 degrees apart. What matters is that they are
made.

Sample Session Number Two Might Look Like This.
1. Begin with concrete questions. What did we do? What part do you remember most? What did
you notice most? And so on.

2. Next ask questions about how they felt about these events. How did you feel about the family?
How did you feel during the womens pull? How did you feel about Ma and Pa not pulling? How
did you feel about not knowing how far we had to go?

3. Then ask them why they felt the way they did. Ask them what they learned from the experience.
Ask them to think of a similar situation in their own lives. What did the womens pull teach
you? What did you learn about yourself today? How is our trek through life similar to todays
experience?

4. Close with one or more scriptures relevant to the discussion. These may have to do with
endurance patience, prayer, service, love, or whatever you feel is appropriate. Talk about these
briefly with the youth and be sure to bear your testimony and express gratitude to your family.

Be Yourself
It is often hard to implement new changes and thoughts in our lives, but it is all part of life and
the process we must go through to become like Christ. On the last day of Trek, we encourage you to
challenge the youth to take home what they have learned and to really change and become like Christ.
We will be using the 3 Card Club method of goal setting to help out the youth in this aspect.

Be yourself in developing your own Processing/Reflection Techniques. You are an individual
and the way that you approach reflection might be different than others. There is not necessarily a right
way. It is important, however, for you to be comfortable as you approach this very important part of the
Trek experience.

The techniques or ways in which you conduct your processing of reflection is your own choice.
It is left up to your own experience, personality, and preparation. Follow the spirit and help your family
search for insights as they learn from their actual Trek experience.

Ma's and Pa's should decide ahead of Trek how they propose to approach reflection and discuss
this with their family as the situation presents itself. Please be comfortable enough with your family
council approach so as to conduct a comfortable Bedtime Routine.

Section Six
The Art of
Asking the Right Questions

What makes a good question? Is it really that hard to ask a question that will open up
discussions, create learning and sharing, and result in productive communications?

The truth is, most of us dont know how to ask good questions, or when we do ask a really great
question, it is by accident. There are several ways to ask questions. Some people seem really good at it,
while others use a
random, what-ever-pops-into-their-head approach.

Fifty percent of good communications is good listening. Asking the right questions must precede
good listening. Good questions pave the way for good communications.

We have all encountered problems with bosses and colleagues, and especially with spouses from
asking the wrong question at the wrong time. We scratch our heads and wonder what went wrong. After
all, we were just asking, right?

The problem is that we were raised by parents and teachers who asked the wrong questions for
most of our lives. Parents ask their children questions designed to teach them something. Teachers also
use questions that are rhetorical or Socratic, designed to make us think and come up with the right
answer, as predetermined by them. There is usually only one right answer, the one they are looking for.
Heres a clue: these peopleparents and teachersarent really asking questions. They are trying
to tell us something. They do not ask questions to learn something, but to teach what they determine is
important. We learn from parents and teachers the wrong way to ask questions in the adult world.

What Real Questions Are Supposed to Do
Real questions are designed to learn about the other persons way of thinking, and to gather
information. A truly neutral question is rare. Most of us ask leading questions designed to influence
others to our way of thinking, just like our parents and teachers do.

Instead of gathering information about the other persons perspective, our questions lead
someone down a thinking path of our choice. One needs only to view TV courtroom dramas to see
prime examples of leading questions.

When you ask leading questions, you must hold your own agenda in sight, and design your
questions to end up with a predetermined answer. The person asking the question is focused on getting
to this result, and therefore is not really listening to the responder with an open and receptive mind.

While this can be an effective teaching method, it is not a way of developing true and meaningful
communications, because the listening is cut off by predetermined goals on the part of one person.
Different Kinds of Questions
Managers overuse this leading style of questioning, and then wonder why they dont fully
understand the actions of employees. They dont have a grasp on what is really going on, because they
arent asking open questions designed for learning.

People in relationships, including spouses, often fall into the leading question trap, in
persistent attempts to influence the perspective of the other person. People communicate better when
they start asking neutral questions to learn about the perspective of the other.

Some authors define questions as being empowering or disempowering. Empowering questions are
positive ones, such as:
What works best for you?
What are you doing right?
What is your favorite part of this?
When are you most effective?

Disempowering questions are also called judging questions. They bring up negative feelings and
focus on what is wrong:
Why did you do that?
What went wrong?
Who caused this?
How could this have happened?

Notice that these disempowering questions can appear to be neutral. They resemble information-
gathering questions. It depends on the source, the context, and tone of voice. There is a fine-line
between information-gathering where one is exploring causes in order to find solutions, and questions
that judge and blame. It also depends on who is asking the questions, their position of authority, and
their prior history of being judgmental and blaming.

In order to frame questions in a neutral, exploration context, it may be necessary to qualify questions
with statements such as:
Help me to understand this situation
I just want to clarify the sources of this problem so we can solve it
Without blaming anyone, can we identify where we went wrong here?

Questions are clearly the way to create open discussions, deepen relationships, and create a learning
environment necessary in any relationship, be it at work or at home.

We all fall into the trap of trying to influence through our questions, because it is so ingrained in us
from early childhood on. It is hard to ask truly neutral, non-leading questions without influencing.

Appreciative Inquiry
Clearly there is much that goes into asking the right questions at the right time. There is a body
of research designed around Appreciative Inquiry, in which people are taught the effectiveness of
keeping discussions and questions positive.

We live in a culture that readily diagnoses what is wrong, gaps in performance, and areas for
improvement. We focus a disproportionate amount of time on how to fix things, without adequately
investigating what is right. We would do well to remember that the research demonstrates that people
learn better when reinforced positively rather than negatively.

QUESTIONS FOR FOCUSING ATTENTION

What question, if answered, could make the most difference to the future of (any event during trek)?
Whats important to you about (any event during trek) and why do you care?
What draws you/us to this inquiry?
Whats our intention here? Whats the deeper purpose (the big why) that is really worthy of our best
effort?
What opportunities can you see in (any event during trek)?
What do we know so far/still need to learn about (any event during trek)?
What are the dilemmas/opportunities in (any event during trek)?
What assumptions do we need to test or challenge here in thinking about (any event during trek)?
What would someone who had a very different set of beliefs than we do say about (any event during
trek)?

QUESTIONS FOR CONNECTING IDEAS AND FINDING DEEPER INSIGHT

Whats taking shape? What are you hearing underneath the variety of opinions being expressed?
Whats in the center of the table? What is the elephant in the room that no one is talking about?
Whats emerging here for you? What new connections are you making?
What had real meaning for you from what youve experienced? What surprised you? What challenged
you?
Whats missing from this picture so far? What is it were not seeing? What do we need more clarity
about?
Whats been your/our major learning, insight, or discovery so far?
Whats the next level of thinking we need to do?
What did you learn about yourself through this activity?
Why is (life skill) important in your daily life?
How does what you learned relate to other parts of your life?
If there was one thing that hasnt yet been said in order to reach a deeper level of Understanding or
clarity, what would that be?

QUESTIONS THAT CREATE FORWARD MOVEMENT

What would it take to create change on this issue?
What could happen that would enable us to feel fully engaged and energized about (any event on trek)?
Whats possible here and who cares? (rather than Whats wrong here and whos responsible?)
What needs our immediate attention going forward?
If our success was completely guaranteed, what bold steps might we choose?
How can we support each other? What unique contributions can each of us make?
What challenges might come our way and how might we meet them?
What conversation, if begun today, could ripple out in a way that created new possibilities for the
future of (anything)?
What seed might we plant together today that could make the most difference to the future of
(anything)?
How can you apply what you learned to a new situation?
How will you act differently in the future?
Section Seven
Games:
Family Home Evening,
Gap Fillers and Captains Night


A Complete Change Pig Latin Style
Initiative Activity

Ask participants to stand on top of a tarp. Once all are on the tarp, tell them that they must turn it over
without stepping off it. All participants must be standing on the tarp at all times. There can be no
stacking or people on top of each other. Participants can only speak Pig Latin while playing.

VARIATIONS:
In a very high functioning group some participants can be given handicaps, such as a blindfold,
or making it a silent activity.
Handicaps can be given to anyone who steps off the tarp.
The facilitator can time the group, and challenge them to do it faster.
As a way of building on the theme of a complete change, participants might tape something
on the side they are going to turn over, e.g., something they wish to leave behind or forgive
themselves for or a goal they hope to achieve.

Safety can be an issue with this activity. The facilitator needs to be involved in spotting. It is important
to mention that participants need to be careful of fingers and hands of persons moving tarp underfoot.
Instruct participants that if they are falling to simply step off the tarp so they dont pull people with
them.

Knee Jive
De-Inhibitizer

Family members sit on their buckets in a circle, shoulder to shoulder. Each member places their
right hand on the knee to the right of them (the left knee of the person to their right). Each member
then places their left hand on the knee to the left of them. No one will have their hand on their own
knee. One person begins the play by tapping with their hand one knee that they are touching. The
purpose is for the family to tap each knee in consecutive order all the way around the circle (each
knee only once). The challenge is to remember not to tap when it is your knees turn, but rather
when it is the turn of the knee your hand is on. This is done several times in either direction.

VARIATION: Try to accomplish this in a specified amount of time. Then try and beat that time.
Lap Sit
De-Inhibitizer, Trust Builder, Initiative Activity

Have the group form a circle with their hands on the backs of each others shoulders and everyone
facing the same direction. They should then step sideways toward the middle of the circle. The
circle will become smaller and their bodies will almost touch. Have everyone sit down lightly on
the knees behind them on the count of three and then stand up again. Tell them that the exercise
requires mutual trust and support. They can now make adjustments in the circle if needed. Count
to three again and have them sit down all the way. After the group is safely seated, ask everyone
to raise their arms into the air and applaud. Have the group use caution when standing up as
someone could get hurt if people fall down on each other. Have them stand up together on the
count of three.

Group Hug
De-Inhibitizer
Have the group form a circle, shoulder to shoulder, and facing the inside of the circle. Everyone
should have their arms around the shoulders of the people next to them. Instruct everyone to pick
up one foot and take a large step into the center of the group; The result is a large group hug.

Name Game
Ice Breaker

Form a circle with the group. Say your name and throw a soft, small object to another person. That
person will say his/her name and quickly throw the pillow to someone else, etc. Do this long enough
so that everyone has said their name several times. While holding the object, say someone elses name
and throw it to that person. Do this long enough for each person to receive the object several times.
While holding the object, name the person you are going to throw it to, and the person for him/her to
throw it to. For example, Rick, throw it to Sally. When Rick catches the pillow, he will say, Sally,
throw it to Jack, etc. Have someone name everyone in the group.

VARIATION: Participants say their names and favorite person, place, or thing. After this has gone
full circle, find out who can name everyone.

Willow in the Wind
De-Inhibitizer, Trust Builder

Ask the group to form a tight circle with one person in the center. The circle will need to be close
enough to the center person so that someone can catch him/her. When everyone is in the spotting
position, the person in the center will go through the command sequence; then fall, with the entire body
stiff, into the hands of the other members. Have the spotters move the faller around the circle, speaking
reassuringly to the faller. Take turns doing this activity until everyone has had a turn. This activity can
create a tone of warmth and caring.



Kings and Queens
Initiative Activity
Form a circle with the buckets. Place four buckets close together to form a couch as part of the circle.
Place two males and two females on the couch, and have the rest of the people fill in the circle, in
alternating order (guy next to girl no two guys next to each other, and no two girls next to each
other). One bucket must be left open. Have everyone fill out their name on a piece of paper. Place all the
pieces of paper in a container. Go around the circle and have someone pick out a piece of paper with
someones name on it (they cannot have their own name). They must not let anyone know whose name
they have. The person to the left of the empty bucket begins by calling out someones name. The person
who is holding a paper with that name must move from their seat to the empty seat. The object of the
game is for the guys to get four guys on the couch while the girls try to get four girls on the couch. This
game is a memory-based game which sometimes leads to humorous results due to its gender-based
competitive nature.
Name Train
Ice Breaker, De-Inhibitizer

A leader is chosen from the family to start the game and everyone forms a circle. The leader walks
over to a person in the family, sticks out his/her hand to shake hands, and says (very enthusiastically)
Hi! My name is _______! Whats yours? When the person (whose name might be Ann) responds,
the leader cheers and yells the name three times as follows: Ann! Ann! Ann! The leader then yells
Ready! Reverse! and turns in the other direction. The person whose name was just cheered (Ann)
puts their hands on the leaders waist, and makes a train. They then move together like a choo-choo
train with the leader in front up to another person. After this second introduction, and Ready!
Reverse! is yelled, this makes a new leader (Ann). Each time from here on out there is a new leader.

VARIATION: Adjectives can be added to the cheer. For example, Ann, Ann, Active Ann!
The Bowl Game
Initiative Activity
To prepare for the game, cut paper into small pieces, yet big enough to write on. Have the players write
down virtually anything that can be used for guessing: objects, famous people, movies, places, anything
that comes to mind. Fold the pieces up and put them into the bowl. Divide into two teams. Each team
has one minute to describe as many pieces of paper from the bowl as possible without saying the word
on the paper. Each team gets one pass per turn and after that it is minus one point for every pass.
Whoever has the most points when the terms in the bowl run out wins.
People2People
De-Inhibitizer

Form pairs facing each other. A single player at the end of the line is designated the caller. As the
caller yells toe to toe, knee to knee, elbow to foot, etc., the pairs perform the described
connection. On the call people to people the players switch partners. The player without a new partner
becomes the new caller. You cant have the same partner twice, unless its a small group. And try to
think of a new combination every time!
Telephone Charades
Ice Breaker
The Telephone Charades Game is a hilarious blend of the classic telephone and charades game.
Select five to six participants and ask them to leave the room. The audience chooses an action that is
specific, silly, and obscure to act out (e.g. a nerds romantic first date, washing an elephant, going
skydiving, etc.). Once the clue has been decided, bring in all the participants and instruct them to face
the right side. The moderator reveals the clue to the first person, who taps the second person on the
shoulder and acts out the topic using charades rules (no talking allowed, no noises). The second person
then taps the third person and acts out his or her understanding of what was acted out. This continues
until it reaches the last person in line, who must guess what the action is. This game is funny because the
action mutates and changes based upon each persons interpretation of what is going on, often leading to
confusion and silly motions.
Thirsty Straws
Initiative Activity
Provide a straw for each player. In groups of four, choose the order in which each person will drink.
Thirsty Straws is a relay race to see who finishes first. The object of the game is to be the first team to
drink the entire liter of water with the requirement that each member of the team can only drink once.
The catch is that if each person does not drink his/her share, the last person is left to finish off whatever
is left. This is usually an extremely difficult task and usually hilarious to watch.
Follow the Leader
Initiative Activity
Ask everyone to stand and arrange the group into a circle, facing inwards. Ask one person to leave the
room for a minute. This person will be the guesser for the round. While he or she is gone, the group
decides who should be the leader. The leader will be the one who sets the movements for that round.
When this person is chosen, invite the guesser to come back. The guesser stands in the very center of the
circle.
When the round begins, everyone starts swinging their arms up and down. The leader will eventually
begin to do other movements, and everyone else mimics the leaders actions, without being too obvious
to reveal who the leader is. The leader can do just about anything he or she wants, such as:
clapping
making a kicking motion with his or her leg
jumping up and down
patting his or her own head
a dance move





Common Ground
Ice Breaker

Make a circle with one less buckets than players. The family sits in a circle with one person standing in
the middle. The person in the middle says I seek common ground with people who were born east of
the Mississippi! Anyone who was, including the person asking the question must get up and run across
the circle to find a new seat. You cant take the seat of the person next to you! There will be one person
left in the middle who must ask the next question. Possibilities include: people who wear glasses!
Likes vanilla ice cream better than chocolate! You can also guide the questions a little deeper I seek
common ground with people whove worked with the homeless. The facilitator may choose to ask
the first few questions to get the game going and set the tone.

Human Knot
De-Inhibitizer, Initiative Activity

Get the group in a tight circle. Have the members of the group reach in with their tight hands and grasp
one of the right hands available. Repeat with left hands. Then ask them to unravel the knot. People may
not let go. The circle of hands is to remain unbroken. However, it may be necessary to change grips due
to the angle of arms and bodies. One variation is for the group to stay silent during the entire activity.
You can easily use this activity as a metaphor for community activism that illustrates an opportunity for
broad perspectives to work together towards a common goal.

Touch the Can
De-Inhibitizer, Initiative Activity

Get the group around the can. Tell the group they all must be touching the can at once, with their
(finger, toe, knee, elbow, shoulder). Variations: Depending on the size of the group, use larger AND
smaller items, and gradually get the group to come closer and closer together physically. Facilitator may
have the group transport the object to a different area with a bizarre matching of body parts (imagine a
group of 10 people carrying a plastic throwing disc across the field on their knees).

Lava Pit
Initiative Activity

Make up a story that the group is being chased and they need to get across a field of hot lava. Give each
group paper plates explaining that when they step on these plates they will not sink into the lava. Give
each team about 1/3 the number of plates as people. The group must figure out how to get the entire
group from point A to point B, from one side of the Hot Lava Pit to the other. Only one person can be on
a plate at a time, and the plates may be picked up and moved. The key to the game is that only part of
the team will be able to cross the field at a time and one person will need to work their way back across
the field to help the rest of the team across. A time limit can also be placed on this game.


Giants, Wizards, & Elves
Initiative Activity
Giants, Wizards, and Elves is a fun game involves some strategy, quick wits and fast legs. Its a simple
game based on the classic game of rock, paper, scissors. It is best played in a large open field.

Teach everyone how to become three different characters: the giant, the wizard, and the elf. Each
character features body motions, hand positions and a loud noise.
For the giant, each person stands on their tippy toes, lifts up their hands high above their heads,
and makes an angry growling noise: Roooar!
For the wizard, each person jumps into a stance with one leg forward, one leg back and slightly
crouching, points their right arm out as though they are holding a wand, and then yell:
Shazam!
For the elf, each person gets down very low, similar to a deep knee bend, puts their hands in
front of their shoulders and while wiggling all ten fingers, makes a high pitched elf noise: Me
me me me!
Practice each motion together a few times. Divide everyone into two teams and have them separate into
opposite sides of the field. This game involves several rounds. For each round, the following takes
place:
1. Each team forms a huddle and decides to become a giant, wizard, or elf. This means that the
WHOLE team is the same character. Each team should be far enough apart that their plans
cannot be heard from the opposing team.
2. Both teams then line up and face each other, about 5 feet apart.
3. The Host says 3..2..1..Go!
4. The whole team then acts out the giant, wizard, or elf (whatever they decided to become).
5. As soon as each team has acted their characters simultaneously, the winner tries to grab the loser
and pulls as many people over to their side as they can. The loser tries to run away, back to their
side, in order to be safe. The winner of each round is determined by the following. The giant
defeats the elf because giants squash elves.
Elves defeat wizards by outsmarting them, chewing at their legs.
The wizard defeats the giant by zapping them with a magic spell.
Identical characters are a draw (no one wins).This process keeps repeating for multiple rounds
until one team is entirely consumed (or when time runs out.)
Three Musketeers Race
De-Inhibitizer, Initiative Activity
Mark two lines on the ground about 20 feet apart. Divide the family into sets of three. Have the
members of each team line up on the starting line with their backs to each other, in a triangle, with their
elbows locked. Once all the teams are ready, yell One for All and All for One! The teams have to run
to the second line, turn around, and run back; keeping their arms linked the entire time. If a team comes
unlinked, they must go back to the starting line and start over. The first team that gets to the second line
and back again wins the game.

Running Free
De-Inhibitizer, Trust Builder

This trust building exercise requires nothing more than a few blindfolds and a large, flat area- preferably
with grass. The group leader can either team people up or allow them to pick their own partners. Once
everyone is in teams of two, one team member will be designated as the leader and the other as the
follower. The follower must wear a blindfold. The group leader will instruct the leaders in each team to
hold the hand of their blindfolded partner and take them on a slow walk around the area for at least 3
minutes. This will allow the partners to get accustomed to the process and their partner. After three
minutes, instruct the teams to take a normal-paced walk for three minutes. After those three minutes are
up, instruct the leaders to take their blindfolded partners on a fast walk for thirty seconds. After each
turn, the blindfolded partner is developing more and more trust in their seeing partner. Instruct the
leaders to take their blindfolded partner on a 30 second jog, then a 15 second run, and lastly, a very fast
15 second run- with breaks in between. After the last run, the follower can take off their blind fold and
rest for a bit with their partner before the process begins over again and the followers become the leaders
and vice versa. After the last run, a discussion can be had about the process, whether or not it was
difficult for participants to trust their partners and if so/not, why?
Knights and Dragons
De-Inhibitizer, Initiative Activity
Choose one child to be the dragon. All the other players are knights. Have the dragon stand in the
middle of the moat. The knights should stand behind one of the two lines. Be sure to have all the
knights behind the same line. To begin play, the dragon yells. Try and cross! All the knights must try
and run past the dragon to the other side, without being tagged. Any knight that is tagged becomes part
of the dragons tail, and must hold hands with the dragon, or any other captured knights. Once part of
the tail, the captured knights must help to tag the knights that are still free. The knight that is caught last
is the winner, and gets to be the dragon in the next round.
Rainmaker
A Simple Closing Activity, Great to Quiet the Troops

Have the family sit on their buckets with their hands free from stuff and their feet firmly planted on the
floor. Instruct the group to do the action you do, but only when you look at them to do it, and to keep
doing that action until another comes. When its time, slowly look around the entire circle. The group
should continue doing the movement until you look at them with a new one.

1. Start by going Shhhh like a windy day.
2. Then rub your palms together, and slowly show that to the entire group. Do each motion for as long as
it takes to get around the group.
3. Then snap your fingers sporadically.
4. Then clap your hands way out-of-rhythm.
5. Then slap the tops of your legs.
6. Then stomp your feet.
7. And then do everything in reverse!


Pebble in the Shoe
Initiative Activity

Pass out a small bag of pebbles to your family. Have each of them choose one. Then have them all sit
in silence and study this pebble with all their senses. They may even taste it if they wish. Tell them to
really get to know their pebble so much so that they could recognize it in a crowd. After a few minutes,
have them put this pebble in their shoe. Let them know you will talk about the rock/pebble at Iowa City.
Be careful not to tell them when to take the rock out. During the Bedtime Routine, talk about its
significance and possible symbolic meanings. Let your family know you will be looking for other
metaphors for the next 4 days during trek. My favorite saying on this matter is: It isnt the mountains
ahead to climb that wear you out; its the pebble in your shoe.
Section Eight
Glossary of Terms
On the Itinerary

3 Card Club Entries

During solo time, participants will fill out three cards that deal with
one goal. See Section Nine.
3 Card Club Exchange
Family members will exchange their cards with three other people in
their own family. See Section Nine.
3 Card Club Explanation
Ma's and Pa's will explain how this process of goal setting will work.
See Section Nine.
All Companies Move Out
Together
Not any one company has to lead out. Everyone should be ready to
leave together.
All Trek Morningside
We will gather and have a Morningside together. This will set the
spiritual tone for the next part of the day. Commanders will get a
chance to bare a testimony to all in attendance. Instructions for Solo
Time will be given.
Arrival at
Indicates a location at which the next event will occur.
Bed Down
Now its time to take what you learned at the hardware shop in Iowa
City and make a shelter for sleeping. Remember, parents under the
cart, boys to one side and girls to the other. Mas and Pas may not
go to bed until ALL members of their family are in their sleeping
bags.
Bedtime Routine
Here is your chance to quiet down the troops. Have everyone get
dressed for bed prior to starting your bedtime routine. All the usual
elements apply (pray/song/devotional/journal), plus you add a section
called reflection. Help the family think about goals they can set based
off what they learned through the trials of the day.
Boys and Pa's walk down to
Echo Canyon
The boys will be given the opportunity to walk to the bottom of the
steepest portion of the women's pull so they can see where the girl's
will be pulling alone.
Breakfast served by Ranch
Hands
You don't have to cook this morning.
Choose a Family Name
The family name will serve to unite the group. It should be
something the youth come up with and can feel comfortable being
referred to as. Chosen names can be fun such as: The Tumbleweeds,
The Chipchuckers or The Rollin Rocks. It could also be historical in
nature such as Smith, Ellsworth, Young, Martin, etc. This name takes
the place of the Ma and Pas given Sir Name.
Clean up Plates at your
own handcart
Though not cooking, we still need to clean our plates.
Cold Watermelen Served
Treat after the women's pull.
Commanders Signal Time
to Wake up
It is the job of the Commanders to let their company know when it is
time to wake up each day.
Commanders/Captains
Competition
A fun part of Wednesday evening where the youth get to watch their
leaders play some pioneer games for points.
Company Morningside
This will set the spiritual tone for the day. Commanders and their
wives will talk not only about the pioneers, but other relevant gospel
topics as well.
Company Testimony
Meeting
It is now time to have a short testimony with your Company. This
will allow more testimonies to be shared rather than have a General
Assembly Testimony Meeting. Gather with your Company
Commander and he will conduct the meeting.
Conductor Knocks
When the Conductor knocks on your door, that signals time for your
family to leave.
Continue Iowa City
Activities
Your family will then finish visiting each shop.
Create a Family Motto
Some groups refer to this as their cheer or yell. It should be the
familys rallying cry. It can be spiritual in nature, something funny,
or the combination of the two. You can sing it, yell it, dance to it,
include a hand gesture with it it does not really matter, so long as it
motivates and excites the youth.
Dessert
Indicates the time to start cooking/eating your family dessert.
Devotional and Journal
Time
This will be your first of many devotionals given with the family.
Base it off of Tuesdays theme. Allow time for journal writing.
Dinner served by Ranch
Hands
You don't have to cook, but you do have to clean.
Evening Routine
Your family has about an hour and fifteen minutes to set up camp, eat
dinner, have prayer/song/devotional/journal, no particular order.
Family Flag
The Ma and Pa will bring a family flag that they have made from a kit
provided by the stake. Bring permanent markers along with you for
the youth to complete the design and add your family name.
Family Home Evening
The parents will plan this event prior to trek. Come prepared to spend
2 quality hours with just your youth and extra leader(s).
Family Prayer and Hug
This will be the first of many prayers together. Once your family is
done with shake down and you are sure the family make-up is right,
have your family kneel in prayer. This will take the place of a large
group prayer in front of the buses. Then have a Group Hug as
described in Section Seven.
Family Rules
Create rules and expectations with your family. See Section Three for
instructions.
Family Time
We will then dismiss the families for some alone time.
Fire Brigade
In honor of Tommy Monson and Danny Larson, the family will get to
stop and play a water game.
Gear Drop Off
All participants will bring their gear to the Stake Center to be loaded
into trailers. Leave one costume at home to wear on Tuesday.
Get Lunch Supplies from
Restaurant
Lunch has been kept cool. Go pick up your family portion at the
Restaurant before you leave.
Girls and Ma's continue on
to Echo Canyon
This is where the boys have all been pulled of the carts and the girls
are on their own.
Girls arrive at Big
Mountain
End of the women's pull.
Greetings
The Ma and Pa should introduce themselves to the family and get
family time started.
Handcart Check-in
Return the handcarts to the designated area.
Hardship - Adults Called
Out
All Mas and Pas will get up early and walk out of camp. You may
wake your oldest child and let him/her know that you have been
called to a general meeting, but do so at your own discretion. The
youth are to cook, eat, pack and strike camp alone. The only adults
left in camp will be the Company Commanders, two medics, a
photographer and videographer. You will be fed the same breakfast as
your youth, just in a different location.
Hardship - Hard Rope Pull
This a part of the Bing Canyon terrain where the carts have to be
pulled up a steep incline with the use of a rope. Our stake wants each
youth to help pull up their own handcart. There will be strong, tough
trekkers who will want to dominate this activity. In fact, they will
think they are doing their family a favor. Please watch that each
youth helps in some way with only their own cart.
Hardship - Lost Child
Your company will lose a child on the trail and you must go back and
look for them before moving on.
Last on Trail
This is the third company to leave camp, 30 mintues after the lead
company departs.
Late Breakfast
A quick meal between rationing and lunch.
Lead on Trail
This is the first company to leave the camp site. Other two companies
must wait 15 minute or 30 minutes later to leave.
Leave for Bing Canyon
All the adults who will be traveling together up to Bing Canyon will
car pool from the Stake Center.
Load the Bus
When the buses arrive, we will load them as quickly as possible.
Traveling to Bing Canyon, we have assigned seats. Coming home, the
youth may choose what bus they are riding.
Lunch
Lunch each day needs no cooking. It is the easiest meal of the day.
Lunches will be eaten next to a cache which provides porta-potties
and water to refill your jugs. Shade should be created at each lunch
stop.
Lunch Served by Ranch
Hands
You will not have to cook lunch this day.
Minor Adjustments
This is the time to try and ascertain if the mix of your family is just
right. For instance, if the leadership has overlooked or was unaware
of a special relationship among your youth, we would need to make
that adjustment before loading the bus. Please locate a Trek
Specialist to make the change.
Morning Routine
Parents are to wake up their family when they hear the signal from
their Commander. You will have about an hour and fifteen minutes
before you need to strike camp. Use this time to get dressed, have
breakfast, offer a prayer, sing a song, give a devotional and write in
your journals. In the morning routine, add 10 minutes for personal
scripture study. You will all be together, but reading independently.
Morning Routine directed
by Youth Leader
This morning, the oldest child of the family will lead the morning
routine. There will be no breakfast cooked due to rationing.
Name Game
See Section Seven for instructions on how this works.
On The Trail
This indicates when it is time to return to the trail.
Opening Exercises
This will include opening hymn, prayer, theme presentation and our
first Story Stop given by Peter Gottfredson and Sarah Goode
Marshall.
Pack the Trailers
After the gear has been checked, it will be loaded into the trailers and
the youth may then leave.
Pass by Bakery
Each family member will receive a coin at check in which they may
now spend at the Bakery on their way out to the train.
Pass out Go Home
Backpacks
After lunch on Saturday, your go home clothes will be available.
Pebble in the Shoe
See Section Six for instructions.

Pioneer Games
We will be playing pioneer games tonight. Each family will be
accumulating a score. The family with the highest score wins.
Pioneer Name Sharing
As part of the Trail of Faith, each participant should have chosen a
pioneer to reflect upon while taking the trek journey. Have everyone
share what they learned about this pioneer and why they choose them.
Prayer Meeting
All staff still in town will come to the stake center for prayer meeting.
Mas and Pas then go to their assigned pew in the chapel to prepare
for the family arrival.
Return to Handcart
Signals end of Solo Time.
Round Robin Retrieval
Each family will be assigned a shop from which to start their Iowa
City experience. From then on, go to whichever shop has the shortest
line. Tonights dinner will be served in the Restaurant.
Sack Lunch on Bus
All those riding the bus will be able to eat lunch.
Second on Trail
This indicates which company will leave 15 minutes after the lead
company.
Separate Into Families
Train Depot staff will be waiting to show the youth who their Ma and
Pa will be and where to sit in the chapel. We will be sitting by
families in a row, and by companies in each section of the chapel.
Set-up Camp
This consists of removing all items from the handcart and turning it
upside down. In this position, you can use it as a table or whatever
else is deemed necessary. Lay the tarps out alongside the upturned
handcart for a family gathering area. It may be necessary to also
create shade for the next few hours as well.
Set-up Shade
Use the skills taught at the hardware shop to set up some shade for
your family. Encourage the family to drink more water and possibly
take their boots off in exchange for their sandals. Sandals are never to
be worn on the trail.
Shake Down
This is the process of going through every part of the youths bucket,
sleeping bag, etc and looking for items that are not on the approved
equipment list. The Ranch Hands will perform this duty, as well as
some Mas and Pas from the same ward to help out if possible.
Solo Time
See Section Nine for instructions.
Sound Off
Assign everyone in your family a number. This is very important,
especially when it is dark and you want to make sure your entire
family is present. You can also use this when you want to make a
quick count or get your whole familys attention. You simply yell,
Tumbleweeds Sound Off! and your family will respond by yelling
out their assigned number in order.
Square Dancing
All trek participants, youth and adults alike, will be having a square
dance. There will be real music and a caller for the event. The youth
will only participate to the extent that the adults participate. Though
you might not believe it, this is a really fun activity after a long days
pull.
Story Stop - Life
Experiences
Your Commander will gather the Company together for each Story
Stop. It is a great time to make shade and rest as well.
Strike Camp
Load your handcarts. The heaviest items should be loaded between
the middle and front of the cart because the people pushing on the
back tend to push down, thereby pulling the front of the cart up. You
do not have to tell the youth this information upfront. You may let
them come to this conclusion while packing, or maybe even after a
few hours on the trail. Encourage those who have good ideas about
packing to speak up and explain to the others their thoughts. If the
youth make some mistakes, you can talk about them during
devotional.
Thats just one of those
questions
See Section Three for instructions.
Theme Presentation
During opening exercises, where we emphasize the theme "Strength
Beyond My Own."
Ward Time
The Captains get this time to spend with their own ward in any way
they desire.
Welcome to Iowa City
Take your family to the assigned area and have a seat. Make sure
your family stays close to you. The Mayor of Iowa City will greet us
and present the program. We will have a Story Stop given by
Francis and Betsy Webster.
Youth Arrival
Participants should arrive at the Stake Center/Train Depot in costume.
The Train Depot staff will greet the youth at the door and tell them
who and where their Ma and Pa are located. The youth will have to
say good-bye to their parents before entering the building. Parents
will be asked to not enter the train depot at any point. They should
drop them off similar to a school drop-off where they dont even
leave the car. There should be no more parents in the parking lot
when the youth eventually load the buses.

Section Nine
Notes on Specific Events

The 3 Card Club
Going home from Pioneer Trek can be a difficult experience. Frustrations will arise as the youth
try to explain to others the experience and changes it has made in their lives. Your challenge is to help
the youth prepare for the challenges that await them at home while trying to implement those changes.

To start the explanation of how the 3 Card Club works, it is often effective to discuss the entire
week, relating the experiences to real life situations. You might start out the saying something like:

We have had a wonderful 5 days together. We have laughed and cried and become best friends. We have
all changed a little. But the whole experience will be worthless if we dont go home better people than
we were when we came. The real challenge of Trek occurs in your own homes and families. As you look
back on the week and think about the future, what are some things we can do to make our lives at home
better?

What you are really doing is setting goals. Ask each member to think of some goals they want to
set in their lives. It is important that the youth themselves come up with their own goals. Encourage
them to write the goals down on a blank page of their journal.. Some examples may be:

1. To express our love for our parents and family members with our words and actions every day
2. To study scriptures daily
3. To make our daily prayers meaningful and sincere
4. To go on a solo every week for at least an hour

At this time you might also want to challenge them to do certain things. By now, they should
look up to you and respect you, so they will take what you say very seriously. You may challenge them
to tell their parents that they love them as soon as they get home. Or you may want to merely express
your love and appreciation for each of them, and your great hope and expectation that you will be all
together again, if not in this life, then in the Celestial Kingdom. You can even assign someone to
organize a family reunion.

If you feel your youth need a quick overview of what a goal should look like, use the
Guidelines for Goal Setting section that follows.

Give everyone 4 index cards before they leave for solo time. They will be choosing one goal
from the list they have written down to work with. While on solo, they are to break down that goal into
three progressive steps that can be measured and assign a date for each step to be complete and write
each step on a single index card. The fourth card is for them to write down what each card says and keep
it for themselves as a reminder.



If today were July 26
th
, here is an example of the process:
1. SET THE GOAL: Eliminate Negative Language
2. BREAK IT DOWN INTO THREE PARTS:
Card One: Count how many times in a week I say negative things, or yell or
otherwise use speech in a negative manner. Deadline is August 2
nd
Contact me by
email: dana@palmerevents.com
Card Two: Reduce the amount of times I use negative language by half. Deadline
is August 9
th
Contact me by text (253) 226-2970
Card Three: Go a whole week without using negative language. Deadline is
August 16
th
Contact me by cell phone (253) 226-2970


3. KEEP A RECORD:
Card Four: This would contain everything above for my own use.

Another example of a goal with a longer target date might look like this:
1. SET THE GOAL: Create a closer relationship with my father (who doesnt live at home)
2. BREAK IT DOWN INTO THREE PARTS:
Card One: Call Dad three times in a week, just to talk. Dont ask for anything.
Deadline is August 2
nd
Contact me by email: dana@palmerevents.com
Card Two: Find a time that Dad and I can do something together without anyone
else. Deadline is September 15
th
Contact me by text (253) 226-2970
Card Three: Organize a surprise party for Dads birthday. Deadline is January 16
th

Contact me by cell phone (253) 226-2970


3. KEEP A RECORD:
Card Four: This would contain everything above for my own use.

The cards should be complete by the time they return from solo. This project is for the adults as well.
When the whole family is back, have everyone exchange the first three cards with three different
members of the family. The person holding the Step Cards will need to contact the Goal Setter on the
Deadline written on the card. This helps everyone by knowing they are accountable to someone. They
will need to report their progress to that person when they are contacted. It also lends support for each
of us and we struggle to make these lasting changes.


Guidelines for Goal Setting
To set effective goals, it is important that one observe the following guidelines. A goal must be:

Conceivable: You must be able to conceptualize the goal so that it is understandable, and then be able
to identify clearly what the first steps would be.

Believable: In addition to being consistent with our personal value system, you must believe you can
reach the goal. This goes back to the need to have a positive, affirmative feeling about ones self. Bear
in mind that few people can believe a goal that theyve never seen achieved by someone else. This has
serious implications for goal-setting in culturally deprived areas.

Achievable: The goals you set must be attainable with your given strengths and abilities. For example,
if you were a rather obese 45 year-old, it would be foolish for you to set the goal of running the four-
minute mile in the next six-months that simply would not be achievable.

Controllable: If your goal includes the involvement of anyone else, you should first obtain the
permission of the other person(s) involved, or the goal may be stated as an invitation. For example, if
your goal were to take your girlfriend to a movie on Saturday night, the goal would not be acceptable as
stated because it involves the possibility that she might turn you down. However, if you said your goal
was merely to invite your girlfriend to the movie, it would be acceptable.

Measurable: your goal must be stated so that it is measurable in time and quantity. For example,
suppose your goal was to work on your term paper this week. You would specify your goal by saying
I am going to write twenty pages by 3:00 PM next Monday. That way, the goal can be measured and
when Monday comes, you know whether or not you have achieved it.

Desirable: Your goal should be something you really want to do. Whatever your ambition, it should be
one that you want to fulfill, rather than something you feel you should do. We are well aware that there
are many things in life a person has to do, but if he is to be highly motivated, he must commit a
substantial percentage of his time to doing things he wants to do. In other words, there should be a
balance in life, but the want



Solo Time
Throughout history and across cultures removing oneself from the demands of daily living in
order to spend quiet, solitary time with oneself has been recognized as a strategy for promoting personal
growth, spiritual insight and creative thinking. The solo requires participants to spend a prescribed
period of time alone in a designated safe location where there is communicative separation from others.
Solo is an opportunity to slow down and simply notice, perhaps for the first time, the wonders of
nature. to reflect upon the trek, the environment, oneself and others.

Instructions will be given during the All Trek Morningside on Saturday. Afterwards, make sure
each youth has their scriptures, journal, 4 index cards and their blank paper and a pen before leaving on
solo. They may also want to bring a blanket to sit on.

The youth will have 45 minutes alone in which to reflect on their experience. They are
encouraged to write in their journals, read scriptures, and pray. This is the time they have to complete
the 3 Card Club assignment. They will also be encouraged to write a letter either to themselves filled
with their future goals or one to their parents expressing gratitude and love. These letters are to be
sealed in the self-addressed envelope and given to their Mas upon return. We will see that the letters
are mailed sometime in November. The youth are also given permission to sleep, eat a snack and just
enjoy the solitude.

Once the youth leave, the adults are encouraged to do solo but stay by your own handcart. This
is your time as well. We only ask that leaders who stay behind keep the noise level down.

If some of your youth return before the end, welcome them home and sit and chat. When you see
your youth, try and greet them with a hug. Gather them together in one place and sound off when solo
time is complete. If someone has not returned, contact your Company Commander immediately.