UPDATE

PARENT
coming alongside your family
Aftershock Youth Group
Hello
Parents!
Summer is finally HERE!
Jordan Forston
Hope you have all had a chance to check out the summer calendar. It is
loaded with fun stuff that is open to all youth entering grade 6 - 12th. We
just ask that all first time visitors bring a medical form with them. Do not
forget that we have Youth Sunday on June 22nd and ask that all youth
attending the mission trip be present. We ask that all youth arrive at
7:30am on Sunday and the service is at 8:45am.
UPCOMING EVENTS
Summer is finally HERE!
Mission Trip
On 6/29/14 from 5:30AM to 2:00PM
Mission trip to Albany, NY!!
Packing
On 6/28/14 from 5:00PM to 6:30PM
Be sure to check out the packing list!
Top 10 Risks for Teen Drivers
By HomeWord.com
1. Driving in the Summer. Summer is the deadliest season for teen drivers, with seven of the top 10 deadliest
days occurring during the 100 days between Memorial Day and Labor Day, according to the American
Automobile Association. Teens drive more during the summer, which may account for the increased risk.
2. Driving under the influence. It is probably no surprise that impaired driving puts teens at risk. What might be
surprising is that nearly 1 in 4 teens admit to driving impaired. Perhaps worse, is that of these, up to 34%
believe that impairment improves their driving.
3. Driving while sleepy. Kids who dont get enough sleep significantly increase the risk for being involved in a
car crash while driving.
4. Texting while driving. Not much needs to be said about why this is a risk. Still, about 40% to 50% of teens
admit to texting while driving. Engaging in other distracting electronics behaviors (like talking on a cellphone)
also increases risks.
5. Loud talking and rowdiness in the car. The risk of a teen driver having a serious driving incident is six times
more likely when there is loud talking in the car. Rowdy passengers doubled the risk for teen drivers.
6. Driving with peers in the car. Teens who drive with teen passengers put everyone in the vehicle at risk. Teen
drivers were more likely to die in a crash if they have one teen passenger, and far more likely to die if they had
two teen passengers.
7. Teen drivers who are comfortable with risk-taking. Teens who are more comfortable with stressful situations
and risk-taking are more likely to be involved in near-crashes or crashes.
8. Riding with impaired drivers. Teens who have ridden with impaired teen drivers are more likely to drive
impaired themselves.
9. Speeding. Speeding as a factor in fatal teen crashes has been increasing in recent years. Half of all fatal
crashes involving 16-year-old drivers with three or more passengers have been found to be speeding-related.
10. Being a female driver. In a study by tire maker Bridgestone Americas, teen female drivers were more likely
to engage in dangerous or distracted driving behaviors than males.
Keeping Instagram Safe
By TheSource4Parents.com
Should I let my daughter have Instagram?
Im asked that question at almost every one of my parenting workshops, and its no wonder. Almost every
teen has the photo-sharing app. If your kid doesnt their best friend does.
Instagram was the fastest growing smartphone app of 2013s top 10 Smartphone apps (Nielsen data), growing
66% last year and ranking 7th overall for the number of users. Yes, Facebook is still number one for Average
Unique Users but ask any teenagers which app they prefer.
Jump on a young persons Instagram and youll quickly get an idea of who they hang out with, where they
spend time, what they enjoy, and sometimes even what they eat. Instagram provides a unique little porthole
into their world. A picture tells 1,000 words right?
This brings up some interesting ramifications for parents. Do you know what your kids are posting on
Instagram? How do they look to friends and to predators? Instagram can be a fun and innocent app, but like
all social media, it requires responsibility by the user. As Instagrams own faq page states:
All photos are public by default which means they are visible to anyone using Instagram or on the
instagram.com website. If you choose to make your account private, then only people who follow you on
Instagram will be able to see your photos.
Parents need to have conversations with their kids about social media responsibility. Ive witnessed the horror
stories when parents dont. If your kids are one of the 31 million Instagram users, make time to talk about basic
common sense social media decisions like these:
- Only chat with people you know face to face.
- Dont post anything you wouldnt want Grandma to see.
- Never post a mean comment about someone.
- Consider setting up privacy settings so only followers can see your photos. Then they have to send you a
follow request which you can either approve or deny.
- Be careful posting your location. If you allow anyone to follow you, then they may be able to see the location
information when you post a picture of your home or your school. You can remove those locations from your
photos by editing your photo map.
- Always report any abusive behavior, the app makes it easy to do. Also, feel free to block a user if they creep
you out! (Just dont block Mom or Dadthey pay your phone bill!)
Many of these are common sense to todays social media users, but parents should never assume their kids
know this. If your kids ever download an app, spend some time on the apps website and read their Privacy
and Safety suggestions.
Instagram is a great photo-sharing app that can be used innocently or dangerously. So parents should be sure
to engage in conversations with their kids before they start snapping pics.
The Songs In Your Kids Headphones
By TheSource4Parents.com
Do you know what the number one song on the charts is right now? Do you know what kids are
gleaning from this song?
I always find it fascinating to discover what young people are listening to in their headphones. Sadly,
most parents who interact with their kids about their music only ask, Thats songs not one of
those EXPLICIT songs, right?
In my parent workshops I encourage parents to approach the conversation a different way. After all,
that EXPLICIT tag only tells you if the song has curse words.
Take the number one song on the charts right now, Timber, by Pitbull and Ke$ha. This song is NOT
EXPLICIT because it doesnt have curse words. So its fair game, right?
Try Googling the lyrics. Heres Pitbulls opening lines:
The bigger they are, the harder they fall
These big-iddy boys are dig-gidy dogs
I have em like Miley Cyrus, clothes off
Twerking in their bras and thongs, timber
Face down, booty up, timber
Thats the way we like towhat?timber
Nice and clean, eh?
So how should parents respond? Ill tell you how they should NOT respond overreaction.
Instead, turn your overreaction into interaction. Parents have an amazing opportunity to use todays
music as a springboard to discussion. The majority of todays young people really like music. Ask a
kid about their music, and chances are, youll probably get them talking. This provides parents with
an opportunity to listen and learn about their kid.
But parents should also feel free to chime in on the dialogue. That doesnt mean turn the dialogue
into a monologue (aka, a boring speech from Dad). This means, use questions to lead them to truth.
If you dont know where to go with this conversation, dont worry. TheSource4Parents.com
provides FREE Music Discussions on their Music Discussions page. Right now, you can find full
discussions for songs in the top 10 like Timber and The Monster. Each of these free discussion
guides provide questions, scripture and a wrap up.
Do you know whats in your kids headphones?
Improving Communication With Your Teenager
By Jim Burns
As Ive interacted with hundreds of parents over the years, Ive come to the conclusion that if you are having
trouble communicating with your teen, you are in the vast majority. Here are my five best tips for how to
improve:
1. Make mealtime family time. A large amount of research has shown that teenagers who dine regularly at
home with their families are more satisfied with life. They are better students, less likely to be sexually
promiscuous, and tend to be less involved with drug and alcohol abuse. Families that dine together regularly
are more connected to one another. Why? Its all about the communication that happens around the dinner
table. Hectic schedules make dining together difficult, but the rewards are worth the effort.
2. Make bedtime communication time. I found that one of the best times to have good communication with my
teens was their bedtime. This was a carryover from their younger years when we tucked them into bed and said
a prayer. At bedtime I found them more in tune with talking about their day, their problems or whatever was on
their mind. The relaxed atmosphere seems to work well for good communication. This is not a good time,
however, for tougher conversations.
3. Have parent-child dates or hangout times. By the time kids are teenagers, they are very focused on their
friends and peers. They are establishing their identities apart from Mom and Dad, but most are willing to do
something fun with their parents; they still like to eat or shop. My habit was to have a monthly date with each of
my children. Times like these create a relaxed atmosphere where communication comes easier.
4. Walk around the block. My good friend John Townsend, author and speaker extraordinaire, regularly took his
sons on a walk around the block. At first they would complain, he said, but about the second time around the
block the floodgates of communication would open. Do whatever it takes to keep the communication lines
open with your kids.
5. Listen more, talk less. Parents can find it challenging to really listen to their kids. It often seems easier to
lecture and scold, but listening produces better results. Sometimes kids just want to talk and they arent really
looking for a parents opinion or another lecture. When you feel you need to weigh in on a topic, it helps if you
ask for your teens permission to share your opinion. This gives them a feeling that you really care for and
respect them. Remember, some of the best communication comes through listening. Listening is the language
of love.