''The Man Who Never Was a Teenager''

by Wayne Rogers
On March 12, 1988, 4:35 A.M., I be-
came the proud fathe.l." of a brand spank-
ing new, 83 pound, 5 ft. 1 in., teenage
daughter. I thought of telling her that
she was still only twelve, but I didn't
think that I could get away with that for
the next seven years. I looked in the
yellow pages under Teen Incubation Ser-
vices to no avail. All means of avoid-
ing teenagism out, I realized I would
have to face this head on. I was forced
to begin to think seriously about teens
and their pilrticular needs and concerns.
Also, as a church, we have enough
children to provide the cast for a remake
of The Exodus. At one time I counted
about a hundred children in our church.
Many of our parents have become or are
fast becoming the parents of teens, and
we are having to address their needs,
their concerns, their desires from a bib-
lical perspective.
As I thought about "Teens," I real-
ized that there once was a man who
never was a teenager. He skipped it com-
pletely. Think of it; he never had to
have zits! Of course, I'm talking about
Adam. And, of course, Eve never was a
teen either. They both started out as
mature adults. Just think about it.
Adam never got to play football or bas-
ketball. Eve never was a cheerleader.
They never even got to date before they
got married. They never went to Six
Flags or Disney World. They never got
to wear designer jeans or Reeboks.
Adam never got his drivers license or
owned a car. Eve didn't have a curling
iron or hair dryer. They never got to
listen to the Top Ten on a stereo tape
player or watch MTV. How did they
survive? How would you have done if
you were Adam or Eve? Could you live
without ever having been a teenager?
Would you think that you had really
been cheated out of something?
The point that I am making is, Do
our children have to act like what we
have come to accept as normal and ac-
cepted teenage behavior? Have Chris-
tians been sucked into accepting certain
behavior from their children who be-
come teens as though it is normal and
there is really nothing that we can do
about it? R.J. Rushdoony has pointed
out, "The modem perspective sees ado-
lescence and its storm and stress, its
rebelliousness and spirit of independ-
ence, as biologically determined and
natural to man. In fact, however, adoles-
cence is a cultural product, a hallmark
of a decadent culture, and almost un-
known in the history of civilization out-
side the modem era. In most cultures,
what we call adolescence is rather a
time of the most careful and attentive
imitation of adults and of the older
generation. Youth, on the verge of ma-
ture life and work, is then most con-
cerned about being closer to the adult
world and accepted by it. Instead of re-
belling against it, youth seeks admis-
sion and initiation into the world of
adults. Only because existentialism
places a premium on isolation and radi-
cal independence do youth associate the
dawn of physical maturity with a
declaration of war and independence.
They are simply enacting thereby the
necessary religious _'confrrrnation' rite of
the modem world. The Christian child
is .confirmed in the faith of his fathers
as he approaches maturity; the confirma-
tion rite of the humanist child is adoles-
cence and its rebelliousness or existen-
tialism." (From The Philosophy of the
Christian Curriculum, pp. 163-164.)
Our children do not have to be teens
in the sense of rebellion against parents
and authority, freedom to do their own
thing, or have as their number one
priorities sports, dating, entertainment,
and recreation. I am not saying that
these things do not have a legitimate
place in the process of maturing and in
the transition from childhood to adult-
hood. But my point is that the Bible
does not recognize a period in a persons
life which is called or identified with
adolescence as such, a time of irrespon-
sibility, rebellion, and recreation. By
our accepting this model, parents have,
in effect, accepted, condoned, and en-
couraged unbiblical behavior in our
children.
The Bible essentially sees people in
two categories; childhood and adult-
hood. Yes, there will be a time of transi-
tion between childhood and adulthood in
which a child is given and takes more
and more responsibility for himself, his
actions and attitudes, while still being
guided, counseled, and corrected by his
parents. But when your child becomes a
teen, don't think that you have to accept
or support adolescent misbehavior. In-
deed the fact that Adam and Eve were
created as adults points us and our
children to the goal that God expects of
them. We are training them for adult-
hood. The teenage years are not some
free period of time for children to sow
their wild oats before they have to settle
down to responsible and mature life.
Our goal in life is maturity, responsi-
bility. Adam never got to be a teen. He
got one day off, the seventh day, the
Sabbath day, then he had to go right to
work, naming animals and tilling the
soil. And pretty soon God gave him a
wife, a girl he'd never even met before,
much less dated. And then came baby
and more babies. His clothes were de-
signer clothes, designed by God. And
the only reason God designed clothes
for Adam and Eve was because of their
sin. God created Adam and Eve in His
own image, Gen. 1:26-28, in know-
ledge, righteousness, holiness of the
truth, with the responsibility for work
and dominion, (see also Eph. 4:24 and
Col. 3: 10). He had to be morally re-
sponsible, not eating of the forbidden
fruit. He had to attend to the worship of
God, attend church, if you will. All of
life was devoted to God; he lived in the
presence of God. This is the goal
toward which we are to be directing and
training our children. Why do we think
that they can live any way they please
pretty much during teenage years and
then expect them to all of a sudden start
acting like mature adults when they get
married?
The teen years are years of transition,
change, growth, and development in the
(Continued on page 32)
Page16 ..,.;_::,;...--.;....;;._...;.;..; _ _... ____ . . ; . . . . . . ; ; . ; . . . ; ; . . ; . . ; ~ . ; . . . . ; ; . ~ ~ = = . . . . . . Th,e Counsel ot Chaicedon, April-May, 1988
Teenager
Continued from page
lives of our children. We do begin to
treat them more like adults. We allow
them to make some decisions, to begin
to take and show responsibility. We
discuss and counsel instead of simply
saying, "Don't do that." They aren't
children any longer. And we can't treat
them as such. But parents are not free
from: their responsibility to continue to
bring them up in the nurture and the
admonition of the Lord. Parents are
never free to allow their children to sin, .
though they may allow them to make
unwise decisions at times and to suffer
the consequences of it. Teens must
honor and obey their parents. As
Christian, baptized teens, they have
taken vows to live as becometh the
followers of Christ, not as the fol-
lowers of KISS.
Parents need to be faithful, coura-
geous, and bold as well as an.d
respectful of their teenage children. It ts
easy to weaken under the pressure of the
constant requests to do this or that, or
the constant reminders that so and so
gets to do this or that. Parents should
not be tyrants. They need to remember
that they are to bring up their children
in the nurture and admonition of the
LORD, and not in their own fancies and
n old fogey" ideas. Parents can exas-
perate their children be un-
reasonable. It is sometimes easter to
just make a blanket rule than have to
thoughtfully and prayerfully deal with a
particular issue. But you have a
responsibility to deal fairly and justly
with your teens.
teens need to keep the goal before
them. Yes, there is a place for football,
for Disney World, for dating, for having
fun and just relaxing. But that should
not be the whole focus of ones life by
any means. Teens are preparing to be
adults, mature, responsible men or
women, husbands or wives. Their pri-
mary responsibility lies in this
Here is where yhey should focus therr
energies and efforts.
Before I close, let me just raiSe
andther example - the example of
Christ. Was Christ ever a teenager?
Well, of course he went through the
ages from 13 to 19. But, what do we
know about that period of time in His
life? The only real reference to that time
is in Luke 2:41-52. We know that at
age 12 he assumed his religious re-
sponsibilities to go to the temple to ex-
press his worship and commitment to
God.Indeed, his wisdom and knowledge
astounded everyone who heard him
teaching and answering questions. The
important thing is in verse 49, where
Jesus responded to his parents who had
been worried sick looking for him for
tlrree days. He said,
11
Did you not know
that I . had to be about my Father's
business?" Every teen has to be about
his Father's business. Filrthermore, the
passage tells us that Jesus returned
home withMary andJoseph and con-
tinued in obedience to them (vs. 51).
Here he was; more knowledgeable than
they, neveithless living in submis-
sion. And, "fie grew in wisdom and
stature, and in. favor with God and
men." Is that what can be said of most
teenagers today - your teens? Unless
we hold these high ideals and expecta-
tions before our children can we expect
them. to purSue to embrace them
as the norm, the accepted pattern for
teens, rather than the l'p.odels that we
see on the TVsitcoiris? You can raisea
go4Iy teen. At'least, 'you ought to be
willing to die tryirig. D
Please do not fail to consider the
announcement on page 15 and the
possibility of your involvement.
Non-Profit
U.S. Posta:ge
PAID
Buti?RATE
Permit No. 1553
Greenville, SC
29602
"HOW TO STOP
THE INF TREATY''

Chairman of
Conservative Caucus
in Washington, D.C.
Hear Phillips discuss the INF
Treaty and the danger he sees
to the national defense of the
United States.
Hear his for
defeating the treaty.
This cassette tape available
fc;>r $4.00 from
Specialty Media
Services
' P.O. Box 28357
Atlanta, GA! 30358
Allow 2 weeks for delivery
Page 32_
_____________ .;..__.-... __________ The Counsel of Chalcedon, April-May, 1988