DONT DRIVE HERE SUBTITLES

-Heay, Heay. I sure hope youre not the type of person who gets skeamish when you see
someone die, because were in a country that has the highest mortality rate per vehicle in all
of Latin America.
-This is Lima, Peru, where for every one hundred vehicles there are on the road 2.7 people will
die.
-On a more positive note, Peru is one of the worlds largest exporters of kabuse (limones), and
that is why Im here.
-Really watch where youre going.
-In just one weeks time I will be delivering a lot of fruit, tubercles on the most dangerous
tricycle youve ever seen.
-Im out of breaks.
-Until then, Ill be driving as many different Peruvian vehicles as I can get my hands on.
-Youre such a piece of.
-Will it be pleasant?
-No. But it will be impactful.
-So, unless you wanna have a brush with death, DONT DRIVE HERE.
-Im Andrew Younghusband.
-Is one week enough time to learn how drive as well as the locals, in a city that has some of the
most dangerous traffic?
-Im about to find out.
-Everywhere you look in Lima, there are cars.
-And then when you look again you realize: Heay, a lot of these cars are cabs.
-Then when you scratch beneath the surface, you learn that on top of the ninety thousand
licensed cabs in lima, there are even more unlicensed cabs operating illegally.
-Legal cabs and illegal cabs in this city combine to make over two hundred thirty thousand
taxis.
- And just, put two hundred and thirty thousand in the perspective, New York City only has
thirteen thousand cabs.
-If Im really going to experience driving in Lima, clearly Im going to have to have a taxicab
experience.
-And the cabby who will be showing me the roads is Renzo Marconi.
-15 years ago we didnt have this kind of traffic in Peru.
-Is that right?
-Heay!
-15 years ago people with pushcarts and pullcarts had room to move.
-These days though, everyones on top of each other.
-In just the last 8 years, the numbers of cars here has doubled.
-And that doesnt even account for the buses and combis and tuk tuks and motorcycles and
bicycles and motorized tricycles.
-Or the wide of super slow things that litter the road here.
-Everybody is allowed to go wherever they want to go and theres no order whatsoever.
-Everybody just sticks their nose in front of you.
-If youre stuck their nose in front of you, hes got the right of way..
-So everybody has to do that right way if you dont get
-I just stick the nose because if I dont Ill never get through.
-Obviously when right of ways are determined by whoever can get there first some serious
accidents seen soon.
-Ive seen vehicles overturned, Ive seen buses overturned.
-A bus overturned?
-It happened yesterday. At the other bridge we were.
-Really?
-Heah. It happened yesterday. It was on the news.
-Oh I hope Im not on the news tonight for having done something so weird that makes a bus
overturned.
-Before I can get going, I have to wait for an entire family of haywalkers .
-Then I pass a VW bug being tugged and then I land geez- in a roundboat from hell.
-Dont do a signal whatsoever.
-And you cant tell him if he does that lot may end badly by him dinged up these cars.
-His car isnt the only dinged up one in this city.
-This is crazy, man.
-The crazy state of cars in Lima is visible on every street.
-Holy wobble entrances. Its folding on its back fenders.
-Its been clobbered recently.
-Lets get away from it before it loses its wheels and runs out of control.
-In a town that clearly has so many collisions, you think that folks who were exposed to the
elements wouldnt wear their helmets on their elbows.
-Your helmet is on your, dont think you wan it on your head.
-You see.
-You should put it on your head, my friend.
-Yeah.
-On wider roads in Lima, I just feel I need advice.
-Its a basic free for all with everybody trying to take first place.
-Nobody is following lane markers, nobodys using a blinker.
-And the cops dont seem to care.
But you wanna cut in front of me.
-How classy, you cab.
-Im out of the air with you. This is as high as I can reach in this car. Ive had it up to here with
you.
-Things running the things all over this town.
-Think nothing of it.
-Its fine.
-And it goes without saying that the outcome of those collisions is not always fine.
-Oooh.
-You see. Thats one accident, ok.
-That guy has run somebody over.
-Ooh.
-That happens every day, Ok.
-No way.
-The traffic here in Lima seems insane.
-But I know for a fact the Peruvian drivers are not insane , because in order to get a drivers
license they have to take a psichological evaluation. And it includes questions like:
-There are people who want to take control of my thoughts and ideas.
-I come to the Peruvian driver examination center where Im told every day, 60% of the people
who take the test, fail.
-But how many people fail the psicological assessment?
-Its something that they wont tell me.
-I dont care what people think about me.
-My parents rarely find more defects in me than they should.
-Really? To get a drivers license?
-Im pretty sure that all these questions are supposed to be answered false.
-I have drunk alcohol in excess.
-But some of them are true.
-I rarely suffer from constipation. Thank god, thats false.
-No, I rarely suffer from constipation. What does it mean? I always suffer from constipation? Is
that false? Or I never suffer from constipation?
-My mental competence is tested further with these series of mazes that belong on a
childrens menu at a family restaurant.
-Get it out.
-And the drawing testing makes me look even childish.
-Really bad drawing. Thats me.
-I have to pick up weights. So thats me.
Weightlifting wasnt the only part of my physical evaluation.
The rigorous testing I was subjected to included things like:
-Proving I know where my nose is.
-.Do you meet people who dont know where his nose is?
-Demonstrating my coordination skills.
-This is so drivers in Peru can practice their stabbing technique when people cut them off.
-And having my blood type recorded.
-You stab people harder if you dont like them.
-Once I prove my knowledge of role rules on street science, its time for the practical part of
the test.
-Now, you think that the practical part of a Peruvian drivers license test would happen here.
-But in fact, my driving skills will be tested here.
-In a cute little fake city.
-Well, little dirt road.
-Sure there is 20 meters of dirt road.
-And there is a roundabout.
And I do have to park a couple of times.
But, theres nobody hard cut edging, nobody cuts me off.
-It feels nothing like driving in Lima.
-So when I finished my exam, I asked the head of this stablisment, Carlos Perochena.
-Why they dont do the test in public?
-We have the cameras filming. And we have all the films. You can see the films in every
examination.
-you may think the cameras are here to watch the drivers performance but in fact theyre
spying in the examiners.
-so think the supervising is near you.
-So doing it here prevents bribery.
-I didnt bride anyone. But now Im licensed to drive in Peru.
-Gracias, amigo. Thank you.
Take care.
At last. Gracias.
When my journey continues.
-oh, piece of crap..
-I learned how to drive a killer combi.
-This is demented intersection ever.
-Here in lima, Peru, drivers like red lights.
-Because when everybodys stopped, street performers entertain the crowds.
-And when everybody stops no ones running into each other.
-Drivers running into each other is something that professor of urban planning, Carlos Alza, is
all to familiar with.
I just on Saturday, one week ago I had a crash.
-what happened?
-A taxi tried to go to the right being in the left. And then he crashed my car. And I Crashed
another car and it was quite complicated.
-Daily occurrence in Lima.
-Well, yeah, that happens every day.
-Whats the most important thing that Lima can do to solve its traffic issue?
-I think the most important thing is to make a strong system of enforcement.
-Traffic laws do exist here in Lima but theyre not being adequately enforced.
-Especially when it comes to these things: combis.
-These vehicles are notorious for driving so reckelessly that locals actually call them combis
asesinas, which means killer combis.
-And its a title sadly pretty well deserved, seeing that all of traffic accidents in Lima, these
things account for just under half of them.
-Combis are handled by two people at a time.
-First is the cobrador.
-The guys who takes the money and deals with the passengers.
-In this case, Pedro Lemos, who says another aspect of his job is to be..
-always talking with the passengers in stress for them to feel theyre not here like burden, you
know.
-That they shouldnt be slow, they should be fast.
This is not a relaxed drive for anybody.
-Then, of course, theres a driver, Alex Fajardo, says hed rather hit a pedestrian than slow
down.
-If a pregnant woman is crossing the street, or if an old man is crossing it, you never stop.
-You dont stop for a pregnant woman or an old man.
-They have to hurry up.
-You got the power because youve got a car.
-Right, youve got the power cos youve got the car, sure.
-Alex says that the only combis drivers who has a crash are the ones untrained.
-If you get hit and you crash, then its your graduation.
-You tell him graduated if you have a crash. Excellent.
-Abre, abre.
-Combis arent on schedule routes which means sometimes some drivers have difficulties
finding passengers.
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