Back to the Future - Week 2

Exodus 20: 4-12 4 4 No carved gods of any size, shape, or form of anything
whatever, whether of things that fly or walk or swim. Don't bow down to them and
don't serve them because I am God, your God, and I'm a most jealous God, punishing
the children for any sins their parents pass on to them to the third, and yes, even to
the fourth generation of those who hate me. But I'm unswervingly loyal to the
thousands who love me and keep my commandments.

7 No using the name of God, your God, in curses or silly banter; God won't put up
with the irreverent use of his name.

8-11 Observe the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. Work six days and do everything you
need to do. But the seventh day is a Sabbath to God, your God. Don't do any work—
not you, nor your son, nor your daughter, nor your servant, nor your maid, nor your
animals, not even the foreign guest visiting in your town. For in six days God made
Heaven, Earth, and sea, and everything in them; he rested on the seventh day.
Therefore God blessed the Sabbath day; he set it apart as a holy day.

12 Honor your father and mother so that you'll live a long time in the land
that God, your God, is giving you.

Mixer:

This week Marty goes back to the year 1955 and meets his parents, grand parents,
aunts and uncles. What are some of the phrases, actions or sentiments from 1985
that show up again in 1955?
“I don’t know if I can take that kind of a rejection”
“If you put your mind to it you can accomplish anything”
“Think McFly think….hello McFly etc.”
“Butthead.”

Going Deeper:

1.) We talked last week about the Exodus text above and breaking the cycle of
generational sin. Recap what our point was. (You can’t choose what gets
passed onto you from your parents, both good and bad. However, you can
break the cycle of bad stuff and “change history”.

2.) Look at Exodus 20:12. What does it mean to “honor” someone? How does
that relate to your father and mother? TO honor someone has nothing to do
with what they’ve done. It’s about their position (like a judge – you honor their
office unrelated to how well they do their job) not their performance in that
position. What is the position your parents hold in your life that is irrespective of
how well they actually do that parenting job? They gave you life. To put it

©2009 Dixon Kinser

 simply, No them. No You. Honoring then is not saying that what may have been
done to you in OK, or glossing over painful wounds or not having personal
emotional boundaries. Part of honoring them simply means being grateful for the
life you’ve been given. Is this easy or hard? How is your gratitude for your
life connected to you ability to know freedom and not become the evil that
you hate? This is the kicker because if we make our practice of gratitude
contingency on a parents not being a jerk we’ll never get out of the pain that’s
been done to us, and therefore, it always has power over us.

3.) The commandment is honor your father and mothers, but why? (so you will
live long in the land promised to you). How is honoring your parents and
breaking the cycle of wounds being handed down connected to living a long
time in the land God gives the people? If we don’t practice gratitude we will
live selfishly and not want to do you work of forgiveness and “rock dropping”
that breaks the cycle. This pattern affects more than just individuals. God knows
that it can take down entire cultures. How can an unwillingness to break the
cycle of pain, being grateful take down an entire culture? Have you seen this
anywhere in our day?

4.) How does Marty’s relationship with his parents change when he goes back to
1955. He sees them as real people full or flaws and insecurities. Read Romans
14:8-14

7 For we do not live to ourselves alone and we do not die to ourselves alone. 8 If we
live, we live to the Lord; and if we die, we die to the Lord. So, whether we live or die,
we belong to the Lord. 9 For this very reason, Christ died and returned to life so that
he might be the Lord of both the dead and the living.
10 You, then, why do you judge your brother or sister? Or why do you treat your
brother or sister with contempt? For we will all stand before God's judgment seat. 11
It is written:

" 'As surely as I live,' says the Lord,

'every knee will bow before me;
every tongue will confess to God.' "

12 So then, we will all give an account of ourselves to God. 13 Therefore let us

stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any
stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister.

What does this text say about honoring our parents? How does it help to see them as
“real people”? This text reminds us that everyone stands before God’s judgment seat for
the things they’ve done. There will be accountability so you don’t need to harbor
unforgiveness or nurture a grudge because that is making you the judge of them. If they
are held accountable to your standards you end up sitting where God is sitting and
making yourself the judge. This will only leave you more empty and doesn’t break the
cycle. Seeing our parents as real people allows us to accept them for who they are, not

©2009 Dixon Kinser

just for what they didn’t give us. Also, it allows you to become a mom and dad that your
children will not hate. If your relationship with your parents is hard, this is how it all tied
together.
Close with a prayer thanking God for your life and giving you gratitude.

©2009 Dixon Kinser