Introduction (0:00-0:58):

Right I actually promised my friends that Id make this video quite a while
ago but Ive not got (a)round to it. But now I finally got round to it, so here
it is. Uh, in this video Im just gonna be attempting to do a variety of
accents from around the world. Ill start off with accents from my own
country which has lots of different accents (uh, um) Im from Britain in
case you didnt notice...Im from the U.K....And yeah, theres lots of
different British accents I can do. And then Ill move on to accents from
other countries and that. Um, the way Im gonna do structure this video is
for each accent Im gonna pretend Im on the phone and Im gonna chat
at (about) random stuff. And when I say random I mean 100% random. It
is complete and utter rubbish. Dont pay attention to what I say; dont
take it seriously. Its just random chatter in the accent. Uh, I may have
made a few references here and there to the individual accent but its
mostly random. Oh yeah, thats how Im gonna structure it, so um, lets
begin.
Accents (0:59-7:08):
1. British Southern English East London Cockney: You alright, is
Dave there? You alright mate hows it going son? Yeah I'm fine mate, just
doing a bit of DIY. This place is a fuckin shithole. But Ill have it sorted in
no time.
2. British (Jamaican influenced) - Southern English London street/
slang/ chav/ thug: Wagwan blud wot u sayin, nah its cool fam. What?
Wot blud u talking about? 'Ey blud now don't fucking hang up on me
yeah. What the fuck! Pussyhole! What the fuck u lookin at?
3. British Southern English Formal RP (Received Pronunciation):
Great, great, fantastic. Thanks a lot. Oh and dont forget to bring me
briefing documents and insurance papers. Yes. Great, thank you.
4. British Southern English Posh upper class accent (annoying British
stereotype): I mean if you ask me there are a great number of individuals
on that list who I most deeply despise. One of them has been my familys
archrival since the mid 18th century. Yes.
5. British English - West Country (stereotypical farmer accent): "I woke
up this morning to see some bastard has stolen my tractor. Anyway, are
you coming with me later to see (uh) Plymouth (VS) Argyle? Nice! Green
army!"

6. British Northern English Manchester: The guy I was interviewing,

mate, was a fuckin knobhead. No seriously, like he asked me if I was
Irish or Scottish. Like just because I dont sound like one of them
Southern fairies.
7. British Northern English Liverpool (aka The Scouser accent): All
right mate, hows it going? Im fine. Well yesterday I got in a fuckin bar
brawl because there was this cheeky dickhead whos like giving me
funny looks and that. So I fuckin smashed a bottle over his head. And
then like 3 of his mates fuckin grabbed me from behind...But then I like
fought them off like and I was swatting them like flies. It was bloody
fantastic.
8. British Welsh (unsure of specific type): Aliens in Cardiff? I dont think
so. Listen I think you need professional help. I have a phone number
here for a high quality counselling service. Did you just call me a sheep
shagger? That is not acceptable. You bloody bastard.
9. British Scottish (unsure of specific type, outside Glasgow?): A
baseball bat, an uzi and a pettle bomb. And then he fuckin dropped to
the floor unconscious...unconscious. Can you believe that? And I just sat
there thinking, is it me or is he just a wee bit off his head?
10. Irish (Type I Northern Ireland type): If you give him an inch, hell
take a fuckin mile. {inaudible} Ill count down: 5, 4,3,2,1. Times Up. Get
the fuck out. Simple as.
11. Irish (Type 2 Southern Irish type): Im not gonna just stand by and
watch some {ponti ???} little fucker put me out of business. I will burn his
fuckin place down to the ground if I have to. And I will stay there for the
fire show with a pint of Guinness in one hand and a pint of Magners in
the other... safe in the knowledge that that cunt wont be fuckin with me
ever again.
12. U.S. American general accent: Dude, Im not an asshole. I dont
like talking to people like that but that bitch had it coming. Seriously, at
the end of the day some people just take the piss. I was really good to
her and she treated me like a fuckin doormat and that is not cool.
Anyway, I gotta go. Ill see ya later dude.
13. U.S. American New York/ Italian American: That douchbag killed his
fuckindog. Thats just crossing the line. I mean he was real close to that
dog, you know. I just think this whole situation has got out of control and I
dont know what to do boss. Any advice?

14. U.S American Southern/ Redneck: I cant understand a God damn

word youre saying you stupid retard. I aint gonna sit here and try and
figure out what kind of mumbo-jumbo, jibber-jabble bullshits coming out
of your stupid chicken shit mouth. Marianne, Marianne get me another
beer! And make sure its cold this time, bitch!
15. Australian general accent: Right, okay, yes. Yes, its the building by
the fish market. Well since your last visit weve got the shower working.
And well Bill almost on his way to open the back gate so the only
question is, where the bloody hell are you? What a fuckin joke!
16. French: Bonjeur, oh-o. Sorry, sorry. Yes, I do speak English (uh) so
you want me to pass this message on to him now? No? Okay, well I will
notify him that you are trying to contact him. Okay, thanks very much.
Bye bye.
17. German: Its time to figure out the patent layout. But if you see
Heinrick just remember to pass on this message to him: That he is a
fuckin cheat. Thats all thank you.
18. Russian: Yuri, hello its Nickoli here. I will never forget that time in
Moscow when Mikhail stole Dimitris vodka...And that he started singing
(the) Soviet National Anthem. Remember that time in Belgrade when
Dimitri stole the police motorbike and crash(ed) into ice cream parlour.
19. Italian (very stereotypical): Well, I tried to tell him before but there
was a communication issue. There was nothing I could do. I am so very
sorry that this happened. {You need to go prepare yourself???} I
regretfully inform you that it is now outside my responsibility.
20. Chinese (Cantonese type?): I assure you that I told Mr. Wong that the
business plan was to go forward. I dont wanna have to keep running
around fixing every little mistake that these stupid incompetent people. I
have a fucking business to run here and I dont need the hassle. Good
day to you.
21. Japanese: {Iseyo Takeya???, Mr Wong.} Meet me at my apartment in
Nagasaki tomorrow at (a) 4 P.M. These people think, cause they say
nothing, they are strong? Well tomorrow all behind this will be shamefully
exposed.
22. Indian: Hey, hey. Dont bloody talk to me like that you bloody bastard.
I am the one trying to help you here. Who else can help you, huh? Your
uncle, huh? He cant even tie his bloody shoelace properly. Without me
you would not be where you are today.

23. South African: Yeah, right. The dopey little shit couldnt even do a
desk job without getting a paper cut... Im serious man. I practically
looked everywhere and the only place I could find was this fucking dump
here. I know man, it takes the fucking piss but what can you do, uh?
24. Nigerian: Hey, dont worry, dont worry I can change the details. That
is not a problem. But this other guy hes becoming a pest. I mean this
guy man who does he think he is? This is (a) fuckin irritating. We dont
want it.
Closing Remarks [His own accent British Southern English London
Hybrid (7:09-8:14):
Right thats all I can do for now. Um, obviously some were a little bit off...I
did make some mistakes here and there. You know, Im only human, no
ones perfect but I did my best and um...(ah) in no way meant to offend
anyone or insult anyones accent or culture or whatever. Even if I did chat
random, stupid stuff on the phone its just...just (uh) because I couldn't
think of anything to say really. But it is...dont...nothing is personal or
nothing like that. You know, um..um I made this mainly for my friends
because they seem to be entertained when I impersonate different
accents and so I thought Id make the video. And (uh) you know if youre
watching..um and you like it then feel free to comment, like, subscribe,
whatever. I dont usually make videos like this by the way. I usually make
videos about games and (uh) {Microsoft sound text to speech voices???}
and stuff like that. But just subscribe anyways you never know...I might
make.... I might remake this (a) better version or something similar to this
but...uh..thanks for watching...um yeah, bye.