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Nevin Varghese

830:321 TF

Social Psychology- Final Essay

Examining the Role of Societal Influences in my Life
Since taking social psychology, I have realized that I cannot see my actions as I used to.
My excuses are no longer simple, but they are now external attributions that I make in order to
maintain my self-esteem. My aggression is not purely a product of my own personality, but the
result of years of exposure to violent media. Even the relationships I have with my family and
friends are not the result of years of knowing them, but due to shared similarities, familiarities,
and rewards. Knowing the reason behind my behaviors, I must not only look to improving my
future, but also must look to the past to see what societal factors created me.
Once, when I was around ten my older sister by three years, took my one and only stuffed
toy, a dog I dearly loved and treasured, named Golden. My sister, angry that I was still carrying
around a toy that I should have out-grown, mercilessly cut up Golden and discarded it into the
garbage can to prevent me from salvaging it. Unsurprisingly, I was angry and as a result, I
punched my sister for the first and last time I can remember. Now, amidst my tears mourning
Golden, my sister too began to cry. As soon as my parents heard our cries, they rushed in to
swiftly discipline us. While being reprimanded for my violence, I tried to defend myself
declaring the overused, it wasnt my fault or she started it. However, these excuses only
served as external attributions for my actions and as defensive mechanisms that protected my
self-esteem. A researcher by the name of Beckman conducted an experiment confirming this
self-defense tactic. After students in an experimental class took an exam, the classs student
teacher was asked why their students either passed or failed. The teachers responded by

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accrediting the students success with themselves, an internal attribution, and failure with the
students, an external attribution meant to protect the teachers own self-esteem. (Self Esteem
Lecture, Slide 4).
While it seems almost natural that I would defend my self-esteem with external
attributions, what is surprising is the aggressive reaction that accompanied my anger. Even my
parents were surprised that I would ever harm anyone, especially one of my siblings, as I had
always been a relatively passive child. Myers suggests that aggression may be due to heredity
influences [on] the neural systems sensitivity to aggressive cues (Myers, 284); but it could not
have been genetic influences since both my parents have always been relatively passive.
However, now that I know about the link between the media and aggression, I believe
there may have been a reason why I punched my sister. Still surprising is that I believe I know
exactly what television show may have caused my aggression. I explicitly remember an episode
from Arthur where the titular character, a fun-loving, cartoon aardvark, punched his younger
sister for breaking one of his model planes. I loved the show with a passion and even attempted
to emulate the aardvark in my own life. It may have been this vivid scene that induced me to act
upon my aggression by punching my sister. One particular research of Albert Bandura and
Richard Walters is very reminiscent of my own act of violence. The researchers had children
view a clip of an adult kicking and punching a Bobo doll and then examined what children did to
Bobo dolls after the children had been slightly aggravated. Almost all experiments found the
children committing the same heinous acts toward the dolls that they had witnessed the adults do
on the television clip (308). In other words, the children acted out what they saw; likewise, I
behaved the way Arthur did by punching my sister.

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Although from this previous scene it may seem that my sister and I loathe each other,
which we did, we have since grown to love each other. Social psychological research has
explored interpersonal attraction extensively and discovered many of the patterns that lead to
relationships. As such, I now know the reasons why I developed this close relationship with my
sister.
Interpersonal attraction is the result of rewards, similarity, familiarity and physical looks,
although this last feature doesnt really apply in my relationship with my sister. In the last few
years, my sister and I have grown much closer especially due to a system of rewards that we both
unknowingly created; she would defend me whenever I got in trouble by making up excuses or
even taking the blame and I would do the same for her. However, it is not just because she
defended me that I came to love her. Aronson and Linder conducted an experiment to test how
subjects would evaluate a confederate after being subjected to one set of positive or negative
comments followed by another set. The researchers found that the group that rated the
confederate most favorably was composed of the subjects who were initially given negative
comments followed by positive comments. (Interpersonal Attraction Lecture, Slide 4). Perhaps
this is why I have grown closer to my sister as well; she never treated me well to begin with, but
when she started to treat me better, I felt rewarded and readily accepted her acts of kindness as a
sign of friendship.
Over the last few years, my sister and I have also come to share many similarities. For
example, since we both attend Rutgers, many of our conversations have been about classes and
college life in general. Our similarities soon bred many experiences that in turn nurtured the
relationship between us. Theodore Newcomb confirmed the notion that similarity breeds
affection in his study of two groups of 17 male transfer students. After the two groups had lived

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together for 13 weeks, he found that those who became friends at the end of the study initially
shared the most similarities (Myers, 330). The students befriended those who were most similar
with them; likewise I began to befriend my sister as we began to share more common
experiences.
As close as we are now, my sister and I would not have the bond we have now if not for
the many years we have spent together. Familiarity goes a long way in determining the strength
of a relationship. After living under the same roof for so long, I have picked up on all of my
sisters habits. Robert Zajonc theorizes that mere exposure is the explanation for attraction
caused by familiarity. In one experiment, Zajonc flashed a particular set of nonsense words or
symbols before students more frequently than other words and symbols. After repeated
exposure, he asked his students to rate the stimuli on their attractiveness; he found that students
liked the nonsense words and symbols that were shown more often than those shown less often
(317).
As much as I like to think that I am a product of my own will, I cannot deny that the
thoughts and decisions I make are influenced and shaped by societal influences. My self-esteem
remains strong due to all the external attributions I have made in my life. Although I am not as
aggressive as I used to be, media portrayal of violence once brought me to belligerent acts, like
punching my sister. In spite of my fights with my sister, interpersonal attractive factors also
helped create a strong bond with her. I like to think that my life never really had any
explanation; I just went with the flow. However, now I have reasons for everything that I have
ever done and will do.

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Works Cited
Myers, D.F., Exploring Social Psychology, New York, McGraw Hill, 6th ed. 2012
Wilder, D., Interpersonal Attraction Lecture, Rutgers New Brunswick
Wilder, D., Self Esteem Lecture, Rutgers New Brunswick