Bitterblooms

Whenhefinallydied,Shawnfoundtohershamethatshecouldnotevenburyhim.

Shehadnoproperdiggingtoolsonlyherhands,thelongknifestrappedtoherthigh,andthesmaller
bladeinherboot.Butitwouldnothavemattered.Beneathitssparsecoveringofsnow,thegroundwas
frozenhardasrock.Shawnwassixteen,asherfamilycountedyears,andthegroundhadbeenfrozen
forhalfherlifetime.Theseasonwasdeepwinter,andtheworldwascold.

Knowingthefutilityofitbeforeshestarted,Shawnstilltriedtodig.Shepickedaspotafewmeters
fromtherudeleantoshehadbuiltfortheirshelter,brokethethincrustofthesnowandsweptitaway
withherhands,andbegantohackatthefrozenearthwiththesmallerofherblades.Buttheground
washarderthanhersteel.Theknifebroke,andshelookedatithelplessly,knowinghowpreciousit
hadbeen,knowingwhatCregwouldsay.Thenshebegantoclawattheunfeelingsoil,weeping,until
herhandsachedandhertearsfrozewithinhermask.Itwasnotrightforhertoleavehimwithout
burialhehadbeenfather,brother,lover.

Hehadalwaysbeenkindtoher,andshehadalwaysfailedhim.Andnowshecouldnotevenbury
him.Finally,notknowingwhatelsetodo,shekissedhimonelasttimetherewasiceinhisbeardand
hishair,andhisfacewastwistedunnaturallybythepainandthecold,buthewasstillfamily,afterall
andtoppledtheleantoacrosshisbody,hidinghimwithinaroughbierofbranchesandsnow.Itwas
useless,sheknewvampiresandwindwolveswouldknockitaparteasilytogetathisflesh.Butshe
couldnotabandonhimwithoutshelterofsomekind.

Shelefthimhisskisandhisbigsilverwoodbow,itsbowstringsnappedbythecold.Butshetookhis
swordandhisheavyfurcloakitwaslittleenoughburdenaddedtoherpack.Shehadnursedhimfor
almostaweekafterthevampirehadlefthimwounded,andthatlongdelayinthelittleleantohad
depletedmostoftheirsupplies.Nowshehopedtotravellightandfast.Shestrappedonherskis,
standingnexttotheclumsygraveshehadbuilthim,andsaidherlastfarewellleaningonherpoles.

Thenshesetoffoverthesnow,throughtheterriblesilenceofthedeepwinterwoods,towardhomeand
fireandfamily.Itwasjustpastmidday.

Bydusk,Shawnknewthatshewouldnevermakeit.

Shewascalmerthen,morerational.Shehadlefthergriefandhershamebehindwithhisbody,asshe
hadbeentaughttodo.Thestillnessandthecoldwereallaroundher,butthelonghoursofskiinghad
leftherflushedandalmostwarmbeneathherlayersofleatherandfur.

Herthoughtshadthebrittleclarityoftheicethathunginlongspearsfromthebare,twistedtrees
aroundher.

Asdarknessthrewitscloakovertheworld,Shawnsoughtshelterintheleeofthegreatestofthose
trees,amassiveblackbarkwhosetrunkwasthreemetersacross.Shespreadthefurcloakshehadtaken
onabarepatchofgroundandpulledherownwovencapeoverherlikeablankettoshutouttherising
wind.Withherbacktothetrunkandherlongknifedrawnbeneathhercape,justincase,sheslepta
brief,warysleep,andwokeinfullnighttocontemplatehermistakes.

Thestarswereoutshecouldseethempeekingthroughthebareblackbranchesaboveher.TheIce
Wagondominatedthesky,bringingcoldintotheworld,asithadforaslongasShawncould
remember.Thedriversblueeyesglareddownather,mocking.

IthadbeentheIceWagonthatkilledLane,shethoughtbitterly.Notthevampire.Thevampirehad
mauledhimbadlythatnight,whenhisbowstringbrokeashetriedtodrawintheirdefense.Butin
anotherseason,withShawnnursinghim,hewouldhavelived.Indeepwinter,heneverhadachance.
Thecoldcreptinpastallthedefensesshehadbuiltforhimthecolddrainedawayallhisstrength,all
hisferocity.Thecoldlefthimashrunkenwhitething,numbandpale,hislipstingedwithblue.And
nowthedriveroftheIceWagonwouldclaimhissoul.

Andhers,too,sheknew.SheshouldhaveabandonedLanetohisfate.ThatwaswhatCregwouldhave
done,orLeilaanyofthem.Therehadneverbeenanyhopethathewouldlive,notindeepwinter.
Nothinglivedindeepwinter.Thetreesgrewstarkandbareindeepwinter,thegrassandtheflowers
perished,theanimalsallfrozeorwentundergroundtosleep.Eventhewindwolvesandthevampires
grewleanandfierce,andmanystarvedtodeathbeforethethaw.

AsShawnwouldstarve.

Theyhadalreadybeenrunningthreedayslatewhenthevampireattackedthem,andLanehadhad
themeatingshortrations.Afterwardhehadbeensoweak.Hehadfinishedhisownfoodonthefourth
day,andShawnhadstartedfeedinghimsomeofhers,nevertellinghim.Shehadverylittleleftnow,
andthesafetyofCarinhallwasstillnearlytwoweeksofhardtravelaway.Indeepwinter,itmightas
wellbetwoyears.

Curledbeneathhercape,Shawnbrieflyconsideredstartingafire.Afirewouldbringvampiresthey
couldfeeltheheatthreekilometersoff.Theywouldcomestalkingsilentlybetweenthetrees,gaunt
blackshadowstallerthanLanehadbeen,theirlooseskinflappingoverskeletallimbslikedarkcloaks,
concealingtheclaws.Perhaps,ifshelayinwait,shecouldtakeonebysurprise.Afullgrownvampire
wouldfeedherlongenoughtoreturntoCarinhall.Sheplayedwiththeideainthedarkness,andonly
reluctantlyputitaside.

Vampirescouldrunacrossthesnowasfastasanarrowinflight,scarcelytouchingtheground,andit
wasvirtuallyimpossibletoseethembynight.Buttheycouldseeherverywell,bytheheatshegave
off.Lightingafirewouldonlyguaranteeheraquickandrelativelypainlessdeath.

Shawnshiveredandgrippedthehiltofherlongknifemoretightlyforreassurance.Everyshadow
suddenlyseemedtohaveavampirecrouchedwithinit,andinthekeeningofthewindshethoughtshe
couldheartheflappingnoisetheirskinmadewhentheyran.

Then,louderandveryreal,anothernoisereachedherearsanangryhighpitchedwhistlinglike
nothingShawnhadeverheard.Andsuddenlytheblackhorizonwassuffusedwithlight,aflickerof
ghostlyblueradiancethatoutlinedthenakedbonesoftheforestandthrobbedvisiblyagainstthesky.
Shawninhaledsharply,adraughtoficedownherrawthroat,andstruggledtoherfeet,halfafraidshe
wasunderattack.Buttherewasnothing.Theworldwascoldandblackanddeadonlythefightlived,
flickeringdimlyinthedistance,beckoning,callingtoher.Shewatcheditforlongminutes,thinking
backonoldJonandtheterriblestoriesheusedtotellthechildrenwhentheygatheredround
Carinhallsgreathearth.Thereareworsethingsthanvampires,hewouldtellthemandremembering,
Shawnwassuddenlyalittlegirlagain,sittingonthethickfurswithherbacktothefire,listeningto
Jontalkofghostsandlivingshadowsandcannibalfamilieswholivedingreatcastlesbuiltofbone.

Asabruptlyasithadcome,thestrangelightfadedandwasgone,andwithitwentthehighpitched
noise.Shawnhadmarkedwhereithadshone,however.ShetookupherpackandfastenedLanes
cloakaboutherforextrawarmth,thenbegantodonherskis.Shewasnochildnow,shetoldherself,
andthatlighthadbeennoghostdance.Whateveritwas,itmightbeheronlychance.Shetookher
polesinhandandsetofftowardit.

Nighttravelwasdangerousintheextreme,sheknew.Creghadtoldherthatahundredtimes,andLane
aswell.Inthedarkness,inthescantstarlight,itwaseasytogoastray,tobreakaskioralegorworse.
Andmovementgeneratedheat,heatthatdrewvampiresfromthedeepofthewoods.Bettertolaylow
untildawn,whenthenocturnalhuntershadretiredtotheirlairs.

Allofhertrainingtoldherthat,andallofherinstincts.Butitwasdeepwinter,andwhensherestedthe
coldbitthrougheventhewarmestoffurs,andLanewasdeadandshewashungry,andthelighthad
beensoclose,soachinglyclose.Soshefollowedit,goingslowly,goingcarefully,anditseemedthat
thisnightshehadacharmuponher.Theterrainwasallflatland,gentletoher,almostkind,andthe
snowcoverwassparseenoughsothatneitherrootnorrockcouldsurpriseandtripher.Nodark
predatorscameglidingoutofthenight,andtheonlysoundwasthesoundofhermotion,thesoft
cracklingofthesnowcrustbeneathherskis.

Theforestgrewsteadilythinnerasshemoved,andafteranhourShawnemergedfromitentirely,into
awastelandoftumbledstoneblocksandtwisted,rustingmetal.Sheknewwhatitwasshehadseen
otherruinsbefore,wherefamilieshadlivedanddied,andtheirhallsandhouseshadgonealltorot.
Butneveraruinsoextensiveasthis.Thefamilythathadlivedhere,howeverlongago,hadbeenvery
greatoncetheshatteredremainsoftheirdwellingsweremoreextensivethanahundredCarinhalls.
Shebegantopickacarefulpaththroughthecrumbling,snowdustedmasonry.Twiceshecameupon
structuresthatwerealmostintact,andeachtimesheconsideredseekingshelterwithinthoseancient
stonewalls,buttherewasnothingineitherofthemthatmighthavecausedthelight,soShawnpassed

onafteronlyabriefinspection.Therivershecametosoonthereafterstoppedherforaslightlylonger
time.

Fromthehighbankwhereshepaused,shecouldseetheremainsoftwobridgesthathadoncespanned
thenarrowchannel,butbothofthemhadfallenlongago.Theriverwasfrozenover,however,soshe
hadnotroublecrossingit.Indeepwintertheicewasthickandsolidandtherewasnodangerofher
fallingthrough.

Assheclimbedpainstakinglyupthefarbank,Shawncameupontheflower.

Itwasaverysmallthing,itsthickblackstememergingfrombetweentworockslowontheriverbank.
Shemightneverhaveseenitinthenight,butherpoledislodgedoneoftheicecoveredstonesasshe
struggleduptheslope,andthenoisemadeherglancedowntowhereitgrew.

Itstartledhersothatshetookbothpolesinonehand,andwiththeotherfumbledinthedeepest
recessesofherclothing,sothatshemightriskaflame.Thematchgaveashort,intenselight.Butit
wasenoughShawnsaw.

Aflower,tiny,sotiny,withfourbluepetals,eachthesamepaleblueshadethatLaneslipshadbeen
justbeforehedied.Aflower,here,alive,growingintheeighthyearofdeepwinter,whenalltheworld
wasdead.

Theywouldneverbelieveher,Shawnthought,notunlessshebroughtthetruthwithher,backto
Carinhall.Shefreedherselffromherskisandtriedtopicktheflower.Itwasfutile,asfutileasher
efforttoburyLane.Thestemwasasstrongasmetalwire.Shestruggledwithitforseveralminutes,
andfoughttokeepfromcryingwhenitwouldnotcome.Cregwouldcallheraliar,adreamer,allthe
thingshealwayscalledher.

Shedidnotcry,though,finally.Shelefttheflowerwhereitgrew,andclimbedtothetopoftheriver
ridge.Thereshepaused.

Beneathher,goingonandonformetersuponmeters,wasawideemptyfield.Snowstoodingreatdrifts
insomeplaces,andinotherstherewasonlybareflatstone,nakedtothewindandthecold.Inthecenter
ofthefieldwasthestrangestbuildingShawnhadevenseen,agreatfatteardropofabuildingthat
squattedlikeananimalinthestarlightonthreeblacklegs.Thelegswerebentbeneathit,flexedandrimed
overwithiceattheirjoints,asifthebeasthadbeenabouttoleapstraightupintothesky.Andlegsand
buildingbothwerecoveredwithflowers.

Therewereflowerseverywhere,Shawnsawwhenshetookhereyesoffthesquatbuildinglongenoughto
look.Theysprouted,singlyandinclusters,fromeverylittlecrackinthefield,withsnowandiceall
aroundthem,makingdarkislandsoflifeinthepurewhitestillnessofdeepwinter.Shawnwalkedthrough
them,closertothebuilding,untilshestoodnexttooneofthelegsandreacheduptotouchitsjoint
wonderinglywithaglovedhand.Itwasallmetal,metalandiceandflowers,likethebuildingitself.

Whereeachofthelegsrested,thestonebeneathhadbrokenandfracturedinahundredplaces,asif
shatteredbysomegreatblow,andvinesgrewfromthecrevices,twistingblackvinesthatcrawledaround
theflanksofthestructurelikethewebsofasummerspinner.Theflowersburstfromthevines,andnow
thatshestoodupclose,Shawnsawthattheywerenotlikeherlittleriverbloomatall.Therewere
blossomsofmanycolors,someasbigasherhead,growinginwildprofusioneverywhere,asiftheydid
notrealizethatitwasdeepwinter,whentheyshouldbeblackanddead.

Shewaswalkingaroundthebuilding,lookingforanentrance,whenanoisemadeherturnherhead
towardtheridge.

Athinshadowflickeredbrieflyagainstthesnow,thenseemedtovanish.Shawntrembledandretreated
quickly,puttingthenearestofthetalllegstoherback,andthenshedroppedeverythingandLanessword
wasinherlefthandandherownlongknifeinherright,andshestoodcursingherselfforthatmatch,that
stupid,stupidmatch,andlisteningfortheflapflapflapofdeathontalonedfeet.

Itwastoodark,sherealized,andherhandshook,andevenasitdidtheshaperusheduponherfromthe
side.Herlongknifeflashedatit,stabbing,slicing,butcutonlytheskincloak,andthenthevampiregavea
shriekoftriumphandShawnwasbuffetedtothegroundandsheknewshewasbleeding.Therewasa
weightonherchest,andsomethingblackandleatherysettledacrosshereyes,andshetriedtoknifeitand
thatwaswhensherealizedthatherbladewasgone.Shescreamed.

Thenthevampirescreamed,andthesideofShawnsheadexplodedinpain,andshehadbloodinher
eyes,andshewaschokingonblood,andbloodandblood,andnothingmore

Itwasblue,allbluehazy,shiftingblue.Apaleblue,dancing,dancing,liketheghostlightthathad
flickeredonthesky.Asoftblue,likethelittleflower,theimpossibleblossombytheriverbank.Acold
blue,liketheeyesoftheIceWagonsblackdriver,likeLaneslipswhenlastshekissedthem.Blue,blue,
anditmovedandwouldnotbestill.Everythingwasblurred,unreal.Therewasonlyblue.Foralongtime,
onlyblue.

Thenmusic.Butitwasblurredmusic,bluemusicsomehow,strangeandhighandfleeting,verysad,
lonely,abiterotic.Itwasalullaby,likeoldTesenyausedtosingwhenShawnwasverylittle,before
TesenyagrewweakandsickandCregputherouttodie.IthadbeensolongsinceShawnhadheardsuch
asongallthemusicsheknewwasCregonhisharp,andRysonherguitar.Shefoundherselfrelaxing,
floating,allherlimbsturnedtowater,lazywater,thoughitwasdeepwinterandsheknewsheshouldbe
ice.

Softhandsbegantotouchher,liftingherhead,pullingoffherfacemasksothebluewarmbrushedher
nakedcheeks,thendriftinglower,lower,looseningherclothes,strippingheroffursandclothandleather,
offwithherbeltandoffwithherjerkinandoffwithherpants.Herskintingled.Shewasfloating,
floating.Everythingwaswarm,sowarm,andthehandsflutteredhereandthereandtheyweresogentle,
likeoldmotherTesenyahadbeen,likehersisterLeilawassometimes,likeDevin.LikeLane,she
thought,anditwasapleasantthought,comfortingandarousingatthesametime,andShawnheldcloseto

it.ShewaswithLane,shewassafeandwarmandandsherememberedhisface,theblueinhislips,
theiceinhisbeardwherehisbreathhadfrozen,thepainburnedintohim,twistinghisfeatureslikea
mask.

Sheremembered,andsuddenlyshewasdrowningintheblue,chokingontheblue,struggling,screaming.

Thehandsliftedherandastrangersvoicemutteredsomethinglowandsoothinginalanguageshedid
notunderstand.AcupwaspressedtoShawnslips.Sheopenedhermouthtoscreamagain,butinstead
shewasdrinking.

Itwashotandsweetandfragrant,fullofspices,andsomeofthemwereveryfamiliar,butothersshe
couldnotplaceatall.Tea,shethought,andherhandstookitfromtheotherhandsasshegulpeditdown.

Shewasinasmalldimroom,proppeduponabedofpillows,andherclotheswerepilednexttoherand
theairwasfullofbluemistfromaburningstick.Awomankneltbesideher,dressedinbrighttattersof
manydifferentcolors,andgrayeyesregardedhercalmlyfrombeneaththethickest,wildesthairthat
Shawnhadeverseen.YouwhoShawnsaid.

Thewomanstrokedherbrowwithapalesofthand.Carin,shesaidclearly.

Shawnnodded,slowly,wonderingwhothewomanwas,andhowsheknewthefamily.

Carinhall,thewomansaid,andhereyesseemedamusedandabitsad.LinandErisandCaith.
rememberthem,littlegirl.Beth,VoiceCarin,howhardshewas.AndKayaandDaleandShawn.

Shawn.ImShawn.Thatsme.ButCregisVoiceCarin

Thewomansmiledfaintly,andcontinuedtostrokeShawnsbrow.Theskinofherhandwasverysoft.
Shawnhadneverfeltanythingsosoft.Shawnismylover,thewomansaid.Everytenthyear,at
Gathering.

Shawnblinkedather,confused.Shewasbeginningtoremember.Thelightintheforest,theflowers,the
vampire.WhereamI?sheasked.

Youareeverywhereyouneverdreamedofbeing,littleCarin,thewomansaid,andshelaughedat
herself.

Thewallsoftheroomshonelikedarkmetal,Shawnnoticed.Thebuilding,sheblurted,thebuildingon
legs,withalltheflowers

Yes,thewomansaid.

Doyouwhoareyou?Didyoumakethelight?Iwasintheforest,andLanewasdeadandIwas
nearlyoutoffood,andIsawalight,ablue

Thatwasmylight,Carinchild,asIcamedownfromthesky.Iwasfaraway,ohyes,farawayinlands
youneverheardof,butIcameback.

Thewomanstoodupsuddenly,andwhirledaroundandaround,andthegaudyclothsheworeflappedand
shimmered,andshewaswreathedinpalebluesmoke.

IamthewitchtheywarnyouofinCarinhall,child,sheyelled,exulting,andshewhirledandwhirled
untilfinally,dizzy,shecollapsedagainbesideShawnsbed.

NoonehadeverwarnedShawnofawitch.Shewasmorepuzzledthanafraid.Youkilledthevampire,
shesaid.Howdidyou?

Iammagic,thewomansaid.IammagicandIcandomagicthingsandIwillliveforever.Andsowill
you,Carinchild,Shawn,whenIteachyou.Youcantravelwithme,andIwillteachyouallthemagics
andtellyoustories,andwecanbelovers.Youaremyloveralready,youknow,youvealwaysbeen,at
Gathering.Shawn,Shawn.Shesmiled.

No,Shawnsaid.Thatwassomeotherperson.

Youretired,child.Thevampirehurtyou,andyoudontremember.Butyouwillremember,youwill.

Shestoodupandmovedacrosstheroom,snuffingouttheburningstickwithherfingertips,quietingthe
music.Whenherbackwasturned,herhairfellnearlytoherwaist,andallofitwascurlsandtangleswild
restlesshair,tossingasshemovedlikethewavesonthedistantsea.Shawnhadseentheseaonce,years
ago,beforedeepwintercame.Sheremembered.Thewomanfadedthedimlightssomehow,andturned
backtoShawnindarkness.

Restnow.Itookawayyourpainwithmymagics,butitmaycomeback.Callmeifitdoes.Ihaveother
magics.

Shawndidfeeldrowsy.Yes,shemurmured,unresisting.Butwhenthewomanmovedtoleave,Shawn
calledouttoheragain.Wait,shesaid.Yourfamily,mother.Tellmewhoyouare.

Thewomanstoodframedinyellowlight,asilhouettewithoutfeatures.Myfamilyisverygreat,child.
MysistersareLilithandMarcyanandErikaStormjonesandLamiyaBailisandDeirdredAllerane.
KleronomasandStephenCobaltNorthstarandTomoandWalbergwereallbrotherstome,andfathers.
OurhouseisuppasttheIceWagon,andmyname,mynameisMorgan.

Andthenshewasgone,andthedoorclosedbehindher,andShawnwaslefttosleep.Morgan,shethought
assheslept.Morganmorganmorgan.Thenamedriftedthroughherdreamslikesmoke.


Shewasverylittle,andshewaswatchingthefireinthehearthatCarinhall,watchingtheflameslickand
teaseatthebigblacklogs,smellingthesweetfragrancesofthistlewood,andnearbysomeonewastelling
astory.NotJon,no,thiswasbeforeJonhadbecomestoryteller.

Thiswaslongago.ItwasTesenya,soveryold,herfacewrinkled,andshewastalkinginhertiredvoice
sofullofmusic,herlullabyvoice,andallthechildrenlistened.HerstorieshadbeendifferentfromJons.
Hiswerealwaysaboutfighting,warsandvendettasandmonsters,chockfullwithbloodandknivesand
impassionedoathsswornbyafatherscorpse.Tesenyawasquieter.Shetoldofagroupoftravelers,sixof
familyAlynne,whowerelostinthewildoneyearduringtheseasonoffreeze.Theychanceduponahuge
hallbuiltallofmetal,andthefamilywithinwelcomedthemwithagreatfeast.Sothetravelersateand
drank,andjustastheywerewipingtheirlipstogo,anotherbanquetwasserved,andthusitwent.The
Alynnesstayedandstayed,forthefoodwasricherandmoredelightfulthananytheyhadevertasted,and
themoretheyateofit,thehungriertheygrew.Besides,deepwinterhadsetinoutsidethemetalhall.
Finally,whenthawcamemanyyearslater,othersoffamilyAlynnewentsearchingforthesixwanderers.
Theyfoundthemdeadintheforest.Theyhadputofftheirgoodwarmfursanddressedinflimsies.Their
steelhadgonealltorust,andeachofthemhadstarved.ForthenameofthemetalhallwasMorganhall,
Tesenyatoldthechildren,andthefamilywholivedtherewasthefamilynamedLiar,whosefoodis
emptystuffmadeofdreamsandair.

Shawnwokenakedandshivering.

Herclotheswerestillpilednexttoherbed.Shedressedquickly,firstpullingonherundergarments,and
overthemaheavyblackwoolshift,andoverthatherleathers,pantsandbeltandjerkin,thenhercoatof
furwithitshood,andfinallythecapes,Lanescloakandherownofchildscloth.Lastofallwasher
facemask.Shepulledthetautleatherdownoverherheadandlaceditclosedbeneathherchin,andthen
shewassafefromdeepwinterwindsandstrangerstouchesboth.Shawnfoundherweaponsthrown
carelesslyinacornerwithherboots.WhenLanesswordwasinherhandandherlongknifebackinits
familiarsheath,shefeltcompleteagain.Shesteppedoutsidedeterminedtofindskisandexit.

Morganmetherwithlaughterbrightandbrittle,inachamberofglassandshiningsilvermetal.Shestood
framedagainstthelargestwindowShawnhadeverseen,asheetofpurecleanglasstallerthanamanand
widerthanCarinhallsgreathearth,evenmoreflawlessthanthemirrorsoffamilyTerhis,whowere
famedfortheirglassblowersandlensmakers.Beyondtheglassitwasmidday,thecoolbluemiddayof
deepwinter.Shawnsawthefieldofstoneandsnowandflowers,andbeyonditthelowridgethatshehad
climbed,andbeyondthatthefrozenriverwindingthroughtheruins.

Youlooksofierceandangry,Morgansaid,whenhersillylaughterhadstopped.Shehadbeen
threadingherwildhairwithwispsofclothandgemsonsilverclipsthatsparkledwhenshemoved.
Come,Carinchild,takeoffyourfursagain.Thecoldcanttouchushere,andifitdoeswecanleaveit.
Thereareotherlands,youknow.Shewalkedacrosstheroom.

Shawnhadletthepointofhersworddrooptowardthefloornowshejerkeditupagain.Stayaway,she
warned.Hervoicesoundedhoarseandstrange.

Iamnotafraidofyou,Shawn,Morgansaid.Notyou,myShawn,mylover.Shemovedaroundthe
swordeasily,andtookoffthescarfshewore,agossamerofgrayspidersilksetwithtinycrimsonjewels,
todrapeitaroundShawnsneck.See,Iknowwhatyouarethinking,shesaid,pointingtothejewels.
Onebyone,theywerechangingcolorfirebecameblood,bloodcrustedandturnedbrown,brownfaded
toblack.Youarefrightenedofme,nothingmore.Noanger.Youwouldneverhurtme.

ShetiedthescarfneatlyunderShawnsfacemask,andsmiled.

Shawnstaredatthegemswithhorror.Howdidyoudothat?shedemanded,backingoffuncertainly.
Withmagic,Morgansaid.Shespunonherheelsanddancedbacktothewindow.Morganisfullof
Magic

Youarefulloflies,Shawnsaid.IknowaboutthesixAlynnes.Imnotgoingtoeathereandstarveto
death.Wherearemyskis?
Morganseemednottohearhertheolderwomanseyeswereclouded,wistful.Haveyoueverseen
AlynneHouseinsummer,child?Itsverybeautiful.Thesuncomesupovertheredstonetower,andsinks
everynightintoJameisLake.Doyouknowit,Shawn?

No,Shawnsaidboldly,andyoudonteither.WhatdoyoutalkaboutAlynneHousefor?Yousaid
yourfamilylivedontheIceWagon,andtheyallhadnamesIneverheardof,Kleraberusandthings
likethat.

Kleronomas,Morgansaid,giggling.Sheraisedherhandtohermouthtostillherself,andchewedona
fingeridlywhilehergrayeyesshone.Allherfingerswereringedwithbrightmetal.Youshouldseemy
brotherKleronomas,child.Heishalfofmetalandhalfofflesh,andhiseyesarebrightasglass,andhe
knowsmorethanalltheVoiceswhoveeverspokenforCarinhall.

Hedoesnot,Shawnsaid.Yourelyingagain!

Hedoes,Morgansaid.Herhandfellandshelookedcross.Hesmagic.Weallare.Erikadied,butshe
wakesuptoliveagainandagainandagain.Stephenwasawarriorhekilledabillionfamilies,more
thanyoucancountandCeliafoundalotofsecretplacesthatnoonehadeverfoundbefore.Myfamily
alldoesmagicthings.Herexpressiongrewsuddenlysly.Ikilledthevampire,didntI?
HowdoyouthinkIdidthat?

Withaknife!Shawnsaidfiercely.Butbeneathhermasksheflushed.Morganhadkilledthevampire
thatmeanttherewasadebt.Andshehaddrawnsteel!SheflinchedunderCregsimaginedfury,and
droppedtheswordtoclatteronthefloor.Allatonceshewasveryconfused.

Morgansvoicewasgentle.Butyouhadalongknifeandasword,andyoucouldntkillthevampire,
couldyou,child?No.Shecameacrosstheroom.Youaremine,ShawnCarin,youaremyloverandmy
daughterandmysister.Youhavetolearntotrust.Ihavemuchtoteachyou.Here.ShetookShawnby
thehandandledhertothewindow.Standhere.Wait,Shawn,waitandwatch,andIwillshowyoumore
ofMorgansmagics.Atthefarwall,smiling,shedidsomethingwithherringstoapanelofbrightmetal
andsquaredimlights.

Watching,Shawngrewsuddenlyafraid.

Beneathherfeet,thefloorbegantoshake,andasoundassaultedher,ahighwhiningshriekthatstabbed
atherearsthroughtheleathermask,untilsheclappedherglovedhandsoneithersideofherheadtoshut
itout.Eventhenshecouldhearit,likeavibrationinherbones.Herteethached,andshewasawareofa
suddenshootingpainupinherlefttemple.Andthatwasnottheworstofit.Foroutside,whereeverything
hadbeencoldandbrightandstill,asomberbluelightwasshiftinganddancingandstainingalltheworld.
Thesnowdriftswereapaleblue,andtheplumesoffrozenpowderthatblewfromeachofthemwerepaler
still,andblueshadowscameandwentupontheriverridgewherenonehadbeenbefore.AndShawn
couldseethelightreflectedevenontheriveritself,andontheruinsthatstooddesolateandbrokenupon
thefarthercrest.Morganwasgigglingbehindher,andtheneverythinginthewindowbegantoblur,until
therewasnothingtobeseenatall,onlycolors,colorsbrightanddarkrunningtogether,likepiecesofa
rainbowmeltinginsomevaststewpot.Shawndidnotbudgefromwhereshestood,butherhandfellto
thehiltofherlongknife,anddespiteherselfshetrembled.

Look,Carinchild!Morganshouted,overtheterriblewhine.Shawncouldbarelyhearher.

Wevejumpedupintotheskynow,awayfromallthatcold.Itoldyou,Shawn.Weregoingtoridethe
IceWagonnow.Andshedidsomethingtothewallagain,andthenoisevanished,andthecolorswere
gone.Beyondtheglasswassky.

Shawncriedoutinfear.Shecouldseenothingexceptdarknessandstars,starseverywhere,morethanshe
hadeverseenbefore.Andsheknewshewaslost.Lanehadtaughtherallthestars,soshecouldusethem
foraguide,findherwayfromanywheretoanywhere,butthesestarswerewrong,weredifferent.She
couldnotfindtheIceWagon,ortheGhostSkier,orevenLaraCarinwithherwindwolves.Shecouldfind
nothingfamiliaronlystars,starsthatleeredatherlikeamillioneyes,redandwhiteandblueandyellow,
andnoneofthemwouldevenblink.

Morganwasstandingbehindher.

AreweintheIceWagon?Shawnaskedinasmallvoice.

Yes.

Shawntrembled,threwawayherknifesothatitboundednoisilyoffametalwall,andturnedtofaceher
host.


Thenweredead,andthedriveristakingoursoulsofftothefrozenwaste,shesaid..

Shedidnotcry.Shehadnotwantedtobedead,especiallynotindeepwinter,butatleastshewouldsee
Laneagain.

MorganbegantoundothescarfshehadfastenedroundShawnsneck.Thestoneswereblackand
frightening.

No,ShawnCarin,shesaidevenly.Wearenotdead.Liveherewithme,child,andyouwillneverdie.
Youllsee.ShepulledoffthescarfandstartingunlacingthethongsofShawnsfacemask.Whenitwas
loose,shepulleditupandoffthegirlshead,tossingitcasuallytothefloor.Yourepretty,Shawn.You
havealwaysbeenpretty,though.Iremember,allthoseyearsago.Iremember.

Imnotpretty,Shawnsaid.Imtoosoft,andImtooweak,andCregsaysImskinnyandmyfaceis
allpushedin.AndImnot

Morganshushedherwithatouchtoherlips,andthenunfastenedherneckclasp.Lanesbatteredcloak
slippedfromhershoulders.Herowncapefollowed,andthenhercoatwasoff,andMorgansfingers
moveddowntothelacesofherjerkin.

No,Shawnsaid,suddenlyshyingaway.Herbackpressedupagainstthegreatwindow,andshefeltthe
awfulnightlayingitsweightuponher.Icant,Morgan.ImCarin,andyourenotfamily,Icant!

Gathering,Morganwhispered.PretendthisisGathering,Shawn.Youvealwaysbeenmyloverduring
theGathering.

Shawnsthroatwasdry.ButitisntGathering,sheinsisted.ShehadseenoneGathering,downbythe
sea,whenfortyfamiliescametogethertotradenewsandgoodsandlove.Butthathadbeenyearsbefore
herblood,sonoonehadtakenhershewasnotyetawoman,andthusuntouchable.Itisnt
Gathering,sherepeated,closetotears.

Morgangiggled.Verywell.IamnoCarin,butIamMorganfullofmagic.IcanmakeitGathering.She
dartedacrosstheroomonbarefeet,andthrustherringsagainstthewalloncemore,andmovedthemthis
wayandthat,inastrangepattern.Thenshecalledout,Look!Turnandlook.

Shawn,confused,glancedbackatthewindow.

Underthedoublesunsofhighsummer,theworldwasbrightandgreen.Sailingshipsmovedlanguidlyon
theslowflowingwatersoftheriver,andShawncouldseethebrightreflectionsofthetwinsunsbobbing
androllingintheirwake,ballsofsoftyellowbutterafloatupontheblue.Eventheskyseemedsweetand
buttery,whitecloudsmovedlikethestatelyschoonersoffamilyCrien,andnowherecouldastarbeseen.
Thefarshorewasdottedbyhouses,housessmallasaroadshelterandgreaterthanevenCarinhall,towers

astallandsleekasthewindcarvedrocksintheBrokenMountains.Andhereandthereandallamong
thempeoplemovedlitheswarthyfolkstrangetoShawn,andpeopleofthefamiliestoo,allmingling
together.Thestonefieldwasfreeofsnowandice,butthereweremetalbuildingseverywhere,some
largerthanMorganhall,manysmaller,eachwithitsdistinctivemarkings,andeveryoneofthemsquatting
onthreelegs.Betweenthebuildingswerethetentsandstallsofthefamilies,withtheirsigilsandtheir
banners.Andmats,thegailycoloredloversmats.Shawnsawpeoplecoupling,andfeltMorganshand
restinglightlyonhershoulder.

Doyouknowwhatyouareseeing,Carinchild?Morganwhispered.

Shawnturnedbacktoherwithfearandwonderinhereyes.ItisGathering.

Morgansmiled.Yousee,shesaid.ItisGathering,andIclaimyou.Celebratewithme.Andher
fingersmovedtothebuckleonShawnsbelt,andShawndidnotresist.

WithinthemetalswallsofMorganhall,seasonsturnedtohoursturnedtoyearsturnedtodaysturnedto
monthsturnedtoweeksturnedtoseasonsonceagain.Timehadnosense.WhenShawnawoke,ona
shaggyfurthatMorganhadspreadbeneaththewindow,highsummerhadturnedbackintodeepwinter,
andthefamilies,ships,andGatheringweregone.Dawncameearlierthanitshouldhave,andMorgan
seemedannoyed,soshemadeitdusktheseasonwasfreeze,withitsominouschill,andwherethestars
ofsunrisehadshown,nowgraycloudsracedacrossacoppercoloredsky.Theyatewhilethecopper
turnedtoblack.Morganservedmushroomsandcrunchysummergreens,darkbreaddrippingwithhoney
andbutter,creamedspicetea,andthickcutsofredmeatfloatinginblood,andafterwardtherewas
flavoredicewithnuts,andfinallyatallhotdrinkwithninelayers,eachadifferentcolorwithadifferent
taste.Theysippedthedrinkfromglassesofimpossiblythincrystal,anditmadeShawnsheadache.And
shebegantocry,becausethefoodhadseemedrealandallofitwasgood,butshewasafraidthatifshe
ateanymoreofitshewouldstarvetodeath.

Morganlaughedatherandslippedawayandreturnedwithdriedleatherystripsofvampiremeatshetold
Shawntokeepitinherpackandmunchonitwhenevershefelthungry.

Shawnkeptthemeatforalongtime,butneveratefromit.

Atfirstshetriedtokeeptrackofthedaysbycountingthemealstheyate,andhowmanytimestheyslept,
butsoonthechangingscenesoutsidethewindowandtherandomnatureoflifeinMorganhallconfused
herpastanyhopeofunderstanding.Sheworriedaboutitforweeksorperhapsonlyfordaysandthen
sheceasedtoworry.Morgancouldmaketimedoanythingshepleased,sotherewasnosenseinShawn
caringaboutit.

SeveraltimesShawnaskedtoleave,butMorganwouldhavenoneofit.Sheonlylaughedanddidsome
greatmagicthatmadeShawnforgetabouteverything.Morgantookherbladesawayonenightwhenshe
wasasleep,andallherfursandleatherstoo,andafterwardShawnwasforcedtodressasMorganwanted
hertodress,incloudsofcoloredsilkandfantastictatters,orinnothingatall.Shewasangryandupsetat

first,butlatershegrewusedtoit.HeroldclothingwouldhavebeenmuchtoohotinsideMorganhall,
anyway.

Morgangavehergifts.Bagsofspicethatsmelledofsummer.Awindwolffashionedofpaleblueglass.A
metalmaskthatletShawnseeinthedark.Scentedoilsforherbath,andbottlesofaslowgoldenliquor
thatbroughtherforgetfulnesswhenhermindwastroubled.Amirror,thefinestmirrorthathadeverbeen.
BooksthatShawncouldnotread.Abraceletsetwithsmallredstonesthandrankinlightalldayand
glowedbynight.CubesthatplayedexoticmusicwhenShawnwarmedthemwithherhand.Bootswoven
ofmetalthatweresolightandflexibleshecouldcrumplethemupinthepalmofonehand.Metal
miniaturesofmenandwomenandallmannerofdemons.

Morgantoldherstories.EachgiftshegavetoShawnhadastorythatwentwithit,ataleofwhereitcame
fromandwhohadmadeitandhowithadcomehere.Morgantoldthemall.

ThereweretalesforeachofherrelativesaswellindomitableKleronomaswhodroveacrossthesky
huntingforknowledge,CeliaMarcyantheevercuriousandhershipShadowChaser,ErikaStormjones
whosefamilycutherupwithknivesthatshemightliveagain,savageStephenCobaltNorthstar,
melancholyTomo,brightDeirdredAlleraneandhergrimghostiytwin.ThosestoriesMorgantoldwith
magic.Therewasaplaceinonewallwithasmallsquareslotinit,andMorganwouldgothereandinsert
aflatmetallicbox,andthenallthelightswouldgooutandMorgansdeadrelativeswouldliveagain,
brightphantomswhowalkedandtalkedanddrippedbloodwhentheywerehurt.Shawnthoughtthey
wererealuntilthedaywhenDeirdrefirstweptforherslainchildren,andShawnrantocomfortherand
foundtheycouldnottouch.ItwasnotuntilafterwardthatMorgantoldherDeirdreandtheotherswere
onlyspirits,calleddownbyhermagic.Morgantoldhermanythings.Morganwasherteacheraswellas
herlover,andshewasnearlyaspatientasLanehadbeen,thoughmuchmorepronetowanderandlose
interest.

ShegaveShawnabeautifultwelvestringedguitarandbegantoteachhertoplayit,andshetaughtherto
readalittle,andshetaughtherafewofthesimplermagics,soShawncouldmoveeasilyaroundtheship.
ThatwasanotherthingthatMorgantaughtherMorganhallwasnobuildingafterall,butaship,a
skyshipthatcouldflexitsmetallegsandleapfromstartostar.Morgantoldherabouttheplanets,lands
outbythosefaroffstars,andsaidthatallthegiftsshehadgivenShawnhadcomefromoutthere,from
beyondtheIceWagonthemaskandmirrorwerefromJamisonsWorld,thebooksandcubesfrom
Avalon,thebraceletfromHighKavalaan,theoilsfromBraque,thespicesfromRhiannonandTaraand
OldPoseidon,thebootsfromBastion,thefigurinesfromChulDamien,thegoldenliquorfromalandso
farawaythatevenMorgandidnotknowitsname.

Onlythefineglasswindwolfhadbeenmadehere,onShawnsworld,Morgansaid.Thewindwolfhad
alwaysbeenoneofShawnsfavorites,butnowshefoundshedidnotlikeithalfsowellasshehad
thoughtshedid.Theotherswereallsomuchmoreexciting.Shawnhadalwayswantedtotravel,tovisit
distantfamiliesinwilddistantclimes,togazeonseasandmountains.Butshehadbeentooyoung,and
whenshefinallyreachedherwomanhood,Cregwouldnotlethergoshewastooslow,hesaid,tootimid,
tooirresponsible.Herlifewouldbespentathome,whereshecouldputhermeagertalentstobetteruse

forCarinhall.EventhefatefultripthathadledherherehadbeenaflukeLanehadinsisted,andLane
aloneofalltheotherswasstrongenoughtostanduptoCreg,VoiceCarin.Morgantookhertraveling,
though,onsailsbetweenthestars.

Whenbluefireflickeredagainsttheicylandscapeofdeepwinterandthesoundroseupoutofnowhere,
higherandhigher,Shawnwouldrusheagerlytothewindow,whereshewouldwaitwithmounting
impatienceforthecolorstoclear.Morgangaveherallthemountainsandalltheseasshecoulddreamof,
andmore.ThroughtheflawlessglassShawnsawthelandsfromallthestoriesOldPoseidonwithits
weathereddocksanditsfleetsofsilverships,themeadowsofRhiannon,thevaultingblacksteeltowersof
aiEmerel,HighKavalaanswindsweptplainsandruggedhills,theislandcitiesofPortJamisonand
JolostaronJamisonsWorld.ShawnlearnedaboutcitiesfromMorgan,andsuddenlytheruinsbythe
riverseemeddifferentinhereyes.Shelearnedaboutotherwaysoflivingaswell,aboutarcologiesand
holdfastsandbrotherhoods,aboutbondcompaniesandslaveryandarmies.FamilyCarinnolonger
seemedthebeginningandtheendofhumanloyalties.

Ofalltheplacestheysailedto,theycametoAvalonmostoften,andShawnlearnedtoloveitbest.On
Avalonthelandingfieldwasalwaysfullofotherwanderers,andShawncouldwatchshipscomeandgo
onwandsofpalebluelight.AndinthedistanceshecouldseethebuildingsoftheAcademyofHuman
Knowledge,whereKleronomashaddepositedallhissecretssothattheymightbeheldintrustfor
Morgansfamily.ThosejaggedglasstowersfilledShawnwithalongingthatwasalmostahurt,butahurt
thatshesomehowcraved.

Sometimesonseveraloftheworlds,butmostparticularlyonAvalonitseemedtoShawnthatsome
strangerwasabouttoboardtheirship.Shewouldwatchthemcome,stridingpurposefullyacrossthefield,
theirdestinationclearfromeverystep.Theynevercameaboard,though,muchtoherdisappointment.
TherewasneveranyonetotouchortalktoexceptMorgan.ShawnsuspectedthatMorganmagickedthe
wouldbevisitorsaway,orelseluredthemtotheirdoom.Shecouldnotquitemakeuphermindwhich
Morganwassomoodythatitmightbeboth.OnedinnertimesherememberedJonsstoryofthecannibal
hall,andlookeddownwithhorrorattheredmeattheywereeating.Sheateonlyvegetablesthatmeal,and
forseveralmealsthereafteruntilshefinallydecidedthatshewasbeingchildish.Shawnconsideredasking
Morganaboutthestrangerswhoapproachedandvanished,butshewasafraid.SherememberedCreg,
whosetemperwasawfulifyouaskedhimthewrongquestion.

Andiftheolderwomanwasreallykillingthosewhotriedtoboardhership,itwouldnotbewiseto
mentionittoher.WhenShawnwasjustachild,CreghadbeatenhersavagelyforaskingwhyoldTesenya
hadtogooutsideanddie.

OtherquestionsShawndidask,onlytofindthatMorganwouldnotanswer.Morganwouldnottalkabout
herownorigins,orthesourceoftheirfood,orthemagicthatflewtheship.

TwiceShawnaskedtolearnthespellsthatmovedthemfromstartostar,andbothtimesMorganrefused
withangerinhervoice.ShehadothersecretsfromShawnaswell.Therewereroomsthatwouldnotopen
toShawn,thingsthatshewasnotallowedtotouch,otherthingsthatMorganwouldnoteventalkabout.

FromtimetotimeMorganwoulddisappearforwhatseemedlikedays,andShawnwouldwander
desolately,withnothingoutsidethewindowtooccupyherbutsteadyunwinkingstars.Onthose
occasionsMorganwouldbesomberandsecretivewhenshereturned,butonlyforafewhours,after
whichshewouldreturntonormal.

ForMorgan,though,normalwasdifferentthanforotherpeople.

Shewoulddanceabouttheshipendlessly,singingtoherself,sometimeswithShawnasadancingpartner
andsometimesalone.ShewouldconversewithherselfinamusicaltonguethatShawndidnotknow.She
wouldbealternatelyasseriousasawiseoldmother,andthreetimesasknowledgeableasaVoice,andas
giddyandgigglyasachildofoneseason.

SometimesMorganseemedtoknowjustwhoShawnwas,andsometimessheinsistedonconfusingher
withthatotherShawnCarinwhohadlovedherduringGathering.Shewasverypatientandvery
impetuousshewasunlikeanyonethatShawnhadevermetbefore.

Youresilly,Shawntoldheronce.YouwouldntbesosillyifyoulivedinCarinhall.Sillypeopledie,
youknow,andtheyhurttheirfamilies.Everyonehastobeuseful,andyourenotuseful.Cregwould
makeyoubeuseful.YoureluckythatyouarentaCarin.

Morganhadonlycaressedher,andgazedatherfromsadgrayeyes.PoorShawn,shedwhispered.
Theyvebeensohardtoyou.HuttheCarinswerealwayshard.AlynneHousewasdifferent,child.You
shouldhavebeenbornanAlynne.Andafterthatshewouldsaynomoreofit.

Shawnsquanderedherdaysinwonderandhernightsinlove,andshethoughtofCarinhalllessandless,
andgraduallyshefoundthatshehadcometocareforMorganasifshewerefamily.Andmore,shehad
cometotrusther.

Untilthedayshelearnedaboutthebitterblooms.

Shawnwokeuponemorningtofindthatthewindowwasfullofstars,andMorganhadvanished.That
usuallymeantalongboringwait,butthistimeShawnwasstilleatingthefoodthatMorganhadleftout
forherwhentheolderwomanreturnedwithherhandsfullofpaleblueflowers.

ShewassoeagerShawnhadneverseenhersoeager.ShemadeShawnleaveherbreakfasthalfeaten,
andcomeacrosstheroomtothefurrugbythewindow,sothatshecouldwindtheflowersinShawns
hair.

Isawwhileyouweresleeping,child,shesaidhappilyassheworked.Yourhairhasgrownlong.It
usedtobesoshort,choppedoffandugly,butyouvebeenherelongenoughandnowitsbetter,longlike
mine.Thebitterbloomswillmakeitbestofall.

Bitterblooms?Shawnasked,curious.Isthatwhatyoucallthem?Ineverknew.


Yes,child,Morganreplied,stillfussingandarranging.Shawnhadherbacktoher,soshecouldnotsee
herface.Thelittleblueonesarethebitterblooms.Theyflowereveninthebitterestcold,sothatswhy
theycallthemthat.OriginallytheycamefromaworldnamedYmir,veryfaroff,wheretheyhavewinters
nearlyaslongandcoldaswedo.TheotherflowersarefromYmirtoo,theonesthatgrowonthevines
aroundtheship.Thosearecalledfrostflowers.Deepwinterisalwayssobleak,soIplantedthemtomake
everythinglooknicer.ShetookShawnbytheshoulderandturnedheraround.Youlooklikemenow,
shesaid.Goandgetyourmirrorandseeforyourself,Carinchild.

Itsoverthere,Shawnanswered,andshedartedaroundMorgantogetit.Herbarefootcamedownin
somethingcoldandwet.Sheflinchedfromitandmadeanoisetherewasapuddleontherug.

Shawnfrowned.ShestoodverystillandlookedatMorgan.Thewomanhadnotremovedherboots.They
dripped.

AndbehindMorgan,therewasnothingtobeseenbutblacknessandunfamiliarstars.Shawnwasafraid
somethingwasverywrong.Morganwaslookingatheruneasily.

Shewetherlips,thensmiledshyly,andwenttogetthemirror.

Morganmagickedthestarsawaybeforeshewenttosleepitwasnightoutsidetheirwindow,butagentle
nightfarfromthefrozenrigorofdeepwinter.Leafytreesswayedinthewindontheperimeteroftheir
landingfield,andamoonoverheadmadeeverythingbrightandbeautiful.Agoodsafeworldtosleepon,
Morgansaid.

Shawndidnotsleep.ShesatacrosstheroomfromMorgan,staringatthemoon.Forthefirsttimesince
shehadcometoMorganhall,shewasusinghermindlikeaCarin.Lanewouldhavebeenproudofher
Cregwouldonlyhaveaskedwhattookhersolong.

Morganhadreturnedwithahandfulofbitterbloomsandbootswetwithsnow.Butoutsidehadbeen
nothing,onlytheemptinessthatMorgansaidfilledthespacebetweenthestars.Morgansaidthatthelight
Shawnhadseenintheforesthadbeenthefiresofhershipasitlanded.Butthethickvinesofthe
frostflowersgrewinandaroundandoverthelegsofthatship,andtheyhadbeengrowingforyears.

Morganwouldnotlethergooutside.Morganshowedhereverythingthroughthegreatwindow.But
ShawncouldnotrememberseeinganywindowwhenshehadbeenoutsideMorganhall.Andifthe
windowwasawindow,wherewerethevinesthatshouldhavecreptacrossit,thedeepwinterfrostthat
shouldhavecoveredit?

ForthenameofthemetalhallwasMorganhall,Tesenyatoldthechildren,andthefamilywholivedthere
wasthefamilynamedLiar,whosefoodisemptystuffmadeofdreamsandair.

ShawnaroseinthelieofmoonlightandwenttowhereshekeptthegiftsthatMorganhadgivenher.She
lookedatthemeachinturn,andliftedtheheaviestofthem,theglasswindwolf.Itwasalargesculpture,
heftyenoughsothatShawnusedtwohandstoliftit,onehandonthecreaturessnarlingsnout,theother
arounditstail.

Morgan!sheshouted.

Morgansatupdrowsily,andsmiled.Shawn,shemurmured.Shawnchild.Whatareyoudoingwith
yourwindwolf?

Shawnadvancedandliftedtheglassanimalhighaboveherhead.Youliedtome.Wevenevergone
anywhere.Werestillintheruinedcity,anditsstilldeepwinter.

Morgansfacewassomber.Youdontknowwhatyouresaying.Shegotshakilytoherfeet.Areyou
goingtohitmewiththatthing,child?Imnotafraidofit.Onceyouheldaswordonme,and
Iwasntafraidofyouthen,either.IamMorgan,fullofmagic.Youcannothurtme,Shawn.

Iwanttoleave,Shawnsaid.Bringmemybladesandmyclothing,myoldclothing.Imgoingbackto
Carinhall.IamawomanofCarin,notachild.Youvemadeachildofme.Bringmefoodtoo.

Morgangiggled.Soserious.AndifIdont?

Ifyoudont,Shawnsaid,thenIllthrowthisrightthroughyourwindow.Sheheftedthewindwolffor
emphasis.

No,Morgansaid.Herexpressionwasunreadable.Youdontwanttodothat,child.

Iwill,Shawnsaid.UnlessyoudoasIsay.

Youdontwanttoleaveme,ShawnCarin,noyoudont.Werelovers,remember.Werefamily.Ican
domagicsforyou.Hervoicetrembled.Putthatdown,child.IllshowyouthingsInevershowedyou
before.Therearesomanyplaceswecangotogether,somanystoriesIcantellyou.Putthatdown.She
waspleading.

Shawncouldsensetriumphoddlyenough,thereweretearsinhereyes.

Whyareyousoafraid?shedemandedangrily.Youcanfixabrokenwindowwithyourmagic,cant
you?EvenIcanfixabrokenwindow,andCregsaysImhardlygoodforanythingatall.

Thetearswererollingdownhernakedcheeksnow,butsilently,silently.

Itswarmoutside,youcanseethat,andtheresmoonlighttoworkby,andevenacity.Youcouldhirea
glazier.Idontseewhyyouaresoafraid.Itisntasifitweredeepwinteroutthere,withcoldandice,
vampiresglidingthroughthedark.Itisntlikethat.

No,Morgansaid,No.

No,Shawnechoed.Bringmemythings.

Morgandidnotmove.Itwasntalllies.Itwasnt.Ifyoustaywithme,youllliveforalongtime.Ithink
itsthefood,butitstrue.Alotofitwastrue,Shawn.Ididntmeantolietoyou.Iwantedittobebest,
thewayitwasformeatfirst.Youjusthavetopretend,youknow.Forgetthattheshipcantmove.Its
betterthatway.Hervoicesoundedyoung,frightenedshewasawoman,andshebeggedlikealittlegirl,
inalittlegirlsvoice.Dontbreakthewindow.Thewindowisthemostmagicthing.Itcantakeus
anywhere,almost.Please,please,dontbreakit,Shawn.Dont.

Morganwasshaking.Theflutteringragssheworeseemedfadedandshabbysuddenly,andherringsdid
notsparkle.Shewasjustacrazyoldwoman.Shawnloweredtheheavyglasswindwolf.Iwantmy
clothing,andmysword,andmyskis.Andfood.Lotsandlotsoffood.BringittomeandmaybeIwont
breakyourwindow,liar.Doyouhearme?

AndMorgan,nolongerfullofmagic,noddedanddidasshewastold.Shawnwatchedherinsilence.
Theyneverspokeagain.

ShawnreturnedtoCarinhallandgrewold.

Herreturnwasasensation.Shehadbeenmissingformorethanastandardyear,shediscovered,and
everyonehadpresumedthatbothsheandLaneweredead.Cregrefusedtobelieveherstoryatfirst,and
theothersfollowedhislead,untilShawnproducedahandfulofbitterbloomsthatshehadpickedfromher
hair.Eventhen,Cregcouldnotacceptthemorefancifulpartsofhertale.

Illusions,hesnorted,everybitofitillusion.Tesenyatoldittrue.Ifyouwentback,yourmagicship
wouldbegone,withnosignthatithadeverbeenthere.Believeme,Shawn

ButitwasnevercleartoherwhetherCregtrulybelievedhimself.Heissuedorders,andnomanorwoman
offamilyCarineverwentthatwayagain.

ThingsweredifferentatCarinhallafterShawnsreturn.Thefamilywassmaller.Laneswasnottheonly
faceshemissedatthemealtable.Foodhadgrownveryshortwhileshehadbeenaway,andCreg,aswas
thecustom,hadsenttheweakestandmostuselessouttodie.Jonwasamongthemissing.Leilawasgone
too,Leilawhohadbeensoyoungandstrong.Avampirehadtakenherthreemonthsago.

Butnoteverythingwassadness.Deepwinterwasending.

And,onamorepersonallevel,Shawnfoundthatherpositioninthefamilyhadchanged.NowevenCreg
treatedherwitharoughrespect.Ayearlater,whenthawwaswellunderway,sheboreherfirstchild,and
wasacceptedasanequalintothecouncilsofCarinhall.ShawnnamedherdaughterLane.

Shesettledeasilyintofamilylife.Whenitwastimeforhertochooseapermanentprofession,sheasked
tobeatrader,andwassurprisedtofindthatCregdidnotspeakagainstherchoice.Rystookheras
apprentice,andafterthreeyearsshegotanassignmentofherown.Herworkkeptherontheroadagreat
deal.WhenshewashomeinCarinhall,however,Shawnfoundtohersurprisethatshehadbecomethe
favoredfamilystoryteller.Thechildrensaidsheknewthebeststoriesofanyone.Creg,everpractical,said
thatherfanciessetabadexampleforthechildrenandhadnoproperlessontothem.Butbythattimehe
wasverysick,avictimofhighsummerfever,andhisoppositioncarriedlittleweight.Hediedsoonafter,
andDevinbecameVoice,agentlerandmoremoderateVoicethanCreg.FamilyCarinhadagenerationof
peacewhilehespokeforCarinhall,andtheirnumbersincreasedfromfortytonearlyonehundred.

Shawnwasfrequentlyhislover.Herreadinghadimprovedagreatdealbythen,throughlongstudy,and
DevinonceyieldedtoherwhimandshowedherthesecretlibraryoftheVoices,whereeachVoicefor
untoldcenturieshadkeptajournaldetailingtheeventsofhisservice

AsShawnhadsuspected,oneofthethickervolumeswascalledTheBookofBeth,VoiceCarin.Itwas
aboutsixtyyearsold.

LanewasthefirstofninechildrenforShawn.Shewaslucky.Sixofthemlived,twofatheredbyfamily
andfourthatshebroughtbackwithherfromGathering.Devinhonoredherforbringingsomuchfresh
bloodintoCarinhall,andlateranotherVoicewouldnameherforexceptionalprowessasatrader.She
traveledwidely,metmanyfamilies,sawwaterfallsandvolcanoesaswellasseasandmountains,sailed
halfwayaroundtheworldonaCrienschooner.Shehadmanyloversandmuchesteem.Jannisfollowed
DevinasVoice,butshehadabitterunhappytimeofit,andwhenshepassed,themothersandfathersof
familyCarinofferedthepositiontoShawn.Sheturneditdown.Itwouldnothavemadeherhappy.
Despiteeverythingshehaddone,shewasnotahappyperson.Sherememberedtoomuch,andsometimes
shecouldnotsleepverywellatnight.

Duringthefourthdeepwinterofherlife,thefamilynumberedtwohundredandthirtyseven,fullya
hundredofthemchildren.Butgamewasscarce,eveninthethirdyearafterfreeze,andShawncouldsee
thehardcoldtimesapproaching.TheVoicewasakindwomanwhofoundithardtomakethedecisions
thathadtobemade,butShawnknewwhatwascoming.ShewasthesecondeldestofthoseinCarinhall.
Onenightshestolesomefoodjustenough,twoweekstravelingsupplyandapairofskis,left
Carinhallatdawn,andsparedtheVoicethegivingoftheorder.

Shewasnotsofastasshehadbeenwhenshewasyoung.Thejourneytookclosertothreeweeksthanto
two,andshewasleanandweakwhenshefinallyenteredtheruinedcity.

Buttheshipwasjustasshehadleftit.

Extremesofheatandcoldhadcrackedthestoneofthespacefieldovertheyears,andthealienflowers
hadtakenadvantageofeverylittleopening.Thestonewasdottedwithbitterblooms,andthefrostflower
vinesthattwinedaroundtheshipweretwiceasthickasShawnrememberedthem.Thebigbrightly
coloredblossomsstirredfaintlyinthewind.

Nothingelsemoved.

Shecircledtheshipthreetimes,waitingforadoortoopen,waitingforsomeonetoseeherandappear.
Butifthemetalnoticedherpresence,itgavenosign.OnthefarsideoftheshipShawnfoundsomething
shehadntseenbeforewriting,fadedbutstilllegible,obscuredonlybyiceandflowers.Sheusedher
longknifetoshattertheiceandcutthevines,soshemightread.Itsaid:

MORGANLEFAY
Registry:Avalon4763319

Shawnsmiled.Soevenhernamehadbeenalie.Well,itdidnotmatternow.Shecuppedhergloved
handstogetheroverhermouth.Morgan,sheshouted.ItsShawn.Thewindwhippedherwordsaway
fromher.

Letmein,Morgan.Lietome,Morganfullofmagic.Imsorry.Lietomeandmakemebelieve.

Therewasnoanswer.Shawndugherselfahollowinthesnow,andsatdowntowait.Shewastiredand
hungry,andduskwascloseathand.Alreadyshecouldseethedriversiceblueeyesstaringthroughthe
wispycloudsoftwilight.

Whenatlastsheslept,shedreamtofAvalon.