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PayitForward|GreaterGood

Pay it Forward
ByRobertEmmons|June1,2007|2Comments

Gratitudemayseemlikeasimpleemotion,butRobertEmmonsarguesthatitinspireskindness,connection,andtransformativelife
changes.Andhesdonetheresearchtoproveit.

ElizabethBartlettisaprofessorofpoliticalscienceataMidwesternuniversity.Atthe
ageof42,herirregularheartbeathadbecomelifethreatening.Ahearttransplantwasherlast
hope,andshewasfortunatetoreceiveone.Inabookchroniclingherjourney,shewritesthat
shefeltthankfulforhernewleaseonlifebutsimplyfeelingthankfulwasntenough.
Ihaveadesiretodosomethinginreturn.Todothanks.Togive
thanks.Givethings.Givethoughts.Givelove.Sogratitudebecomesthegift,
creatingacycleofgivingandreceiving,theendlesswaterfall.Fillingupand
spillingoverperhapsnoteventothegiverbuttosomeoneelse,towhoever
crossesonespath.Itisthesimplepassingonofthegift.
WhatBartlett
describesistrue
gratitude.Asthis
briefpassage
illustrates,gratitude
ismorethana
pleasantfeelingitis
alsomotivating.
Gratitudeservesasa
keylinkbetween
receivingandgiving:
Itmovesrecipients
toshareandincrease
theverygoodthey
havereceived.
Becausesomuchof
humanlifeisabout
giving,receiving,and
repaying,gratitudeis
BradAldridge
apivotalconceptfor
oursocial
interactions.ThefamedsociologistGeorgSimmeldeclaredthatgratitudeisthemoralmemory
ofmankind.Ifeverygratefulaction,hewentontosay,weresuddenlyeliminated,society
wouldcrumble.
Yetgratitudesbenefitsarerarelydiscussedthesedaysindeed,incontemporaryAmerican
society,wevecometooverlook,dismiss,orevendisparagethesignificanceofgratitude.
Partoftheproblem,Ithink,isthatwelackasophisticateddiscourseforgratitudebecausewe
areoutofpractice.ThelatephilosopherRobertSolomonnotedhowrelativelyinfrequently
Americanstalkaboutgratitude.Despitethefactthatitformsthefoundationofsociallifein
manyothercultures,inAmerica,weusuallydontgiveitmuchthoughtwithanotable
exceptionofoneday,Thanksgiving.Ontheotherhand,wetendtoscrutinizeanger,
resentment,happiness,andromanticlove.
Ithasbeenarguedthatmalesinparticularmayresistexperiencingandexpressinggratefulness
insomuchasitimpliesdependencyandindebtedness.Onefascinatingstudyinthe1980sfound
thatAmericanmenwerelesslikelytoregardgratitudepositivelythanwereGermanmen,andto
viewitaslessconstructiveandusefulthantheirGermancounterparts.Gratitudepresupposesso
manyjudgmentsaboutdebtanddependencythatitiseasytoseewhysupposedlyselfreliant
Americanswouldfeelqueasyaboutevendiscussingit.
Weliketothinkthatweareourowncreatorsandthatourlivesareourstodowithaswe

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please.Wetakethingsforgranted.Weassumethatwearetotallyresponsibleforallthegood
thatcomesourway.Afterall,wehaveearnedit.Wedeserveit.AscenefromTheSimpsons
capturesthismentality:Whenaskedtosaygraceatthefamilydinnertable,BartSimpsonoffers
thefollowingwords:DearGod,wepaidforallthisstuffourselves,sothanksfornothing.
Inonesense,ofcourse,Bartisright.TheSimpsonfamilydidearntheirownmoney.Buton
anotherlevel,heismissingthebiggerpicture.Thegratefulpersonsensesthatmuchgoodness
happensindependentlyofhisactionsoreveninspiteofhimself.Gratitudeimplieshumilitya
recognitionthatwecouldnotbewhoweareorwhereweareinlifewithoutthecontributionsof
others.Howmanyfamilymembers,friends,strangers,andallthosewhohavecomebeforeus
havemadeourdailyliveseasierandourexistencefreer,morecomfortable,andevenpossible?It
ismindbogglingtoconsider.
Indeed,contemporarysocialscienceresearchremindsusthatifweoverlookgratitude,itwillbe
atourownemotionalandpsychologicalperil.Afteryearsofignoringgratitudeperhapsbecause
itappears,onthesurface,tobeaveryobviousemotion,lackingininterestingcomplications
researchershavefoundthatgratitudecontributespowerfullytohumanhealth,happiness,and
socialconnection.
Ifirststartedstudyinggratitude10yearsago.Whiletheemotioninitiallyseemedsimplisticto
me,Isoondiscoveredthatgratitudeisadeep,complexphenomenonthatplaysacriticalrolein
humanhappiness.MyresearchpartnershipwithMichaelMcCulloughattheUniversityofMiami
hasledtoseveralimportantfindingsaboutgratitude.Wevediscoveredscientificproofthatwhen
peopleregularlyworkoncultivatinggratitude,theyexperienceavarietyofmeasurablebenefits:
psychological,physical,andsocial.Insomecases,peoplehavereportedthatgratitudeledto
transformativelifechanges.Andevenmoreimportantly,thefamily,friends,partners,and
otherswhosurroundthemconsistentlyreportthatpeoplewhopracticegratitudeseem
measurablyhappierandaremorepleasanttobearound.Iveconcludedthatgratitudeisoneof
thefewattitudesthatcanmeasurablychangepeopleslives.
Thescienceofgratitude
Attheoutsetofourresearch,MikeMcCulloughandIassumedthatregularlypracticinggratitude
shouldenhancepeoplespsychologicalandsocialfunctioningwethenbasedaseriesof
experimentsonthatassumption.
Inourfirststudy,MikeandIrandomlyassignedparticipantsoneofthreetasks.Wedecidedto
encouragesomeparticipantstofeelgratitudeandotherstobenegativeandirritable.Wealso
createdathird,neutralgroupbywhichtomeasuretheothers.Onceaweekfor10weeks,the
studysparticipantskeptashortjournallistingfivethingsthathadoccurredoverthepastweek.
Theyeitherbrieflydescribed,inasinglesentence,fivethingsforwhichtheyweregrateful(the
gratitudecondition),ortheydidtheopposite,describingfivehasslesthatdispleasedthem(the
hasslescondition).Theneutralcontrolgroupwassimplyaskedtolistfiveeventsor
circumstancesthathadaffectedthemeachweek,andtheywerenottoldtoaccentuatethe
positiveornegativeaspectsofthosecircumstances.
Togiveaflavorforwhatparticipantswroteabout,examplesofgratitudeinducingexperiences
includedwakingupthismorning,thegenerosityoffriends,Godforgivingme
determination,andtheRollingStones.Examplesofhassleswere:hardtofindparking,
messykitchennoonewillclean,financesdepletingquickly,anddoingafavorforfriendwho
didntappreciateit.
AlthoughIbelievedwedseethebenefitsofgratitude,Iwasntsurethisresultwouldbe
inevitableorunequivocal.Tobegratefulmeanstoallowoneselftobeplacedinthepositionofa
recipienttofeelindebted,awareofonesdependenceonothers,andobligatedtoreciprocate.
Anexerciselikeoursmightremindpeoplethattheyneedtorepaythekindnessofothers,and
theymayresenttheseobligationsandevenreportstrongnegativefeelingstowardtheir
benefactors.
SoIwassurprisedathowdramaticallypositiveourresultswere.Attheendofthe10weeks,
participantswhodkeptagratitudejournalfeltbetterabouttheirlivesasawholeandweremore
optimisticaboutthefuturethanparticipantsineitheroftheothertwoconditions.Toputitinto
numbers,accordingtothescaleweusedtocalculatewellbeing,theywereafull25percent
happierthantheotherparticipants.Thoseinthegratitudeconditionreportedfewerhealth
complaintsandevenspentmoretimeexercisingthancontrolparticipantsdid,andsignificantly
moretimeexercisingthanthoseinthehasslescondition(nearly1.5hoursmoreperweek).This
isamassivedifference.Thegratitudegroupparticipantsalsoexperiencedfewersymptomsof

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physicalillnessthanthoseineitheroftheothertwogroups.
Inasecondstudy,weaskedparticipantstokeepjournalseverydayfortwoweeks.People
assignedtoexpressgratitudeagainshowedanimpressivearrayofbenefits:Onsurveyswegave
allstudyparticipants,peoplewhokeptagratitudejournalreportedfeelingmorejoyful,
enthusiastic,interested,attentive,energetic,excited,determined,andstrongthanthoseinthe
hasslescondition.Theyalsoreportedofferingothersmoreemotionalsupportorhelpwitha
personalproblemsupportingthenotionthatgratitudemotivatespeopletodogood.Andthis
wasnotlimitedtowhattheysaidaboutthemselves.Wesentsurveystopeoplewhoknewthem
well,andthesesignificantothersratedparticipantsinthegratitudegroupasmorehelpfulthan
thoseintheothergroups(thesefriendswerenotawareofwhichexperimentalconditionthe
participantswerein).
Wegotsimilarresultsinastudyofadultswithneuromusculardisorders,manyofwhomsuffered
fromfatigue,slowlyprogressivemuscleweakness,muscleandjointpain,andmuscularatrophy.
Littleisknownaboutfactorsaffectingthequalityoflifeamongpeoplewithneuromuscular
disorders.Thisstudygaveusauniqueopportunitytodetermineifthegratitudeintervention
couldhelpimprovethewellbeingofthesepeoplecopingwithachronicphysicaldisease.
Participantsinthegratitudeconditionshowedsignificantlymorepositiveemotionsand
satisfactionwithlifethanacontrolgroup,whilealsoshowingfewernegativeemotions.Theyalso
feltmoreoptimismabouttheupcomingweekandfeltcloserandmoreconnectedtoothers,
eventhoughmanylivedaloneanddidnotincreasetheiractualcontacttimewithothers.
Remarkably,thesepositiveemotionalandpsychologicalchangeswerentonlyapparenttothe
participantsthemselves:Basedonreportswereceivedfromthespousesofstudyparticipants,
peopleinthegratitudeconditionseemedoutwardlyhappierthanpeopleinthecontrolgroup.
Participantsinthegratitudeconditionalsoreportedgettingmorehoursofsleepeachnight,
spendinglesstimeawakebeforefallingasleep,andfeelingmorerefresheduponawakening.This
findingisenormous,inthatsleepdisturbanceandpoorsleepqualityhavebeenidentifiedas
centralindicatorsofpooroverallwellbeing,aswellasincreasedriskforphysicaldiseaseand
prematuredeath.Itmaysoundsimplistic,buttheevidencecannotbeignored:Ifyouwantto
sleepmoresoundly,countblessings,notsheep.
Oneoftheimportantfeaturesofallofthesestudiesisthatwerandomlyassignedparticipantsto
conditions.Manypeoplewhotendtowardpessimismmayhavebeenplacedinthegratitude
group,justasoptimistsmayhavebeenintheotherconditions.Plus,fewstudieshavebeenable
tosuccessfullycreateinterventionstoincreasehappinessorwellbeingwewereabletodoso
withanexercisethatrequiredminimaleffort.
Otherstudieshavecorroboratedourfindingsandfurthertestifiedtogratitudesbenefits,
especiallyforsocialconnections.Forexample,additionalresearchMikeandIconductedhas
shownthatindividualswhoreporthabituallyexperiencinggratitudeengagemorefrequentlyin
kindorhelpfulbehaviorsthandopeoplewhoexperiencegratitudelessoften.
Wevealsoidentifiedpeoplewithstrongdispositionstowardgratitudeandaskedtheirfriendsto
tellusaboutthem.Wethencomparedtheirfriendsresponsestofeedbackwereceivedfromthe
friendsoflessgratefulpeople.Accordingtotheirfriends,gratefulpeopleengagedinmore
supportive,kind,andhelpfulbehaviors(e.g.,loaningmoney,providingcompassion,sympathy,
andemotionalsupport)thandidlessgratefulpeople.
SomeparticularlyinformativeresearchhasbeenconductedbyDavidDeStenoandMonica
BartlettatNortheasternUniversity.Intheircreativestudies,participantsworkedonacomputer
generatedtaskwhentheywereabouttoreceivetheirscore,thescreensuddenlywentblank.
Anotherpersonintheroomaconfederate,someonesecretlyworkingwiththeresearchers
discoveredthatthemonitorsplughadbeenpulledpartiallyoutofthepowerstripandthen
helpeddisplaytheparticipantsscores.Uponleavingthelaboratory,theparticipantwasaskedif
theywouldvolunteertoassistinanother,ostensiblyunrelatedexperiment,whichinvolved
completingatediousandtaxingsurvey.
Comparedtopeoplewhodidntreceivethefavor,includingsomewhowereputinagoodmood
bywatchingafunnyvideoclip,thepeoplewhoreceivedthefavorandfeltgratefultowardthe
confederateweremorelikelytogothroughthetroubleoffillingoutthesurvey.Thissuggests
theuniqueeffectsofgratitudeinmotivatinghelpingbehavior,moresothanthegeneraleffects
ofsimplybeinginapositivemood.
Whyisgratitudegood?

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Sowhyisgratitudegood?Fortwomainreasons,Ithink.First,gratitudestrengthenssocialties.
Itcultivatesanindividualssenseofinterconnectedness.Thiswasbeautifullyillustratedina
storybyRoger,amanweinterviewedinourresearchonpatientswithchronicneuromuscular
disease.
Facedwithescalatingmedicalbillsandanextendedperiodofunemployment,Rogerwasonthe
vergeoflosinghishomeuntilfriendsorganizedabenefitpartytoraisemoneyforhim.He
wroteinhisgratitudejournal:
Wellthebigdaycameaftermuchanticipation.Abouttwohundred
peopleshowedup,boughtraffletickets,drank,danced,partiedandatetil1
a.m.closing!Wewentuponstagetothankeveryoneamidjoy,tears,and
hugs.Mymanagercutmeacheckforover$35,000thenextweek!Without
thatcheckmyhouse/carwouldhavebeenonthemarket.Wesawsomany
friendsandcoworkersitwastrulyagreatnight.The$1,000firstprizewas
donatedbacktousbythewinner(astranger!).Mydoctorandnursealso
attendedandourprieststoppedbyforafewbeersIkeepthinkingofmore
highlightsasIwrite.ItrulyfeltlikeGeorgeBaileyinItsaWonderfulLife!Ifeel
myselfalmosttearingupasIwrite.MyheartwarmsasIseethepeoplethat
attended.IalsofeelaneedtohelporreachouttootherswheneverIcanhelp
byspeakingorjustlistening.
InRogersresponsetothatevening,andhisdesiretohelpothersasaresult,wecanseehow
gratitudetrulyservesasthemoralmemoryofmankind.
Asecondreasonsupportingthepowerofgratitudeisthatgratitudeincreasesonessenseof
personalworth.Whenweexperiencegratitude,weunderstandthatanotherpersonwishesus
well,andinturn,wefeellovedandcaredfor.Ifsomeonehasincurredapersonalcostbyhelping
meout,thenhowcanInotconcludethatIhavevalueinthatpersonseye?
Itmightbethislinkthatexplainswhygratitudecanbeapowerfulantidotetoadepressedview
oflife.Oneofthereasonsgratitudemakesushappieristhatitforcesustoabandonabeliefthat
mayaccompanyseveredepressionthattheworldisdevoidofgoodness,love,andkindness,
andisnothingbutrandomnessandcruelty.Byrecognizingpatternsofbenevolence,the
depressedpersonmaychangehisorherselfperception(IguessImnotsuchaloserafterall).
Byfeelinggrateful,weareacknowledgingthatsomeone,somewhere,isbeingkindtous.And
therefore,wecanseenotjustthatweareworthyofkindness,butthatkindnessindeedexistsin
theworldand,therefore,thatlifemaybeworthliving.
Wearereceptivebeings,dependentonthehelpofothers,ontheirgiftsandtheirkindness.As
such,wearecalledtogratitude.Lifebecomescompletewhenweareabletogivetootherswhat
weourselvesreceivedinthepast.Inoneofourstudies,a33yearoldwomanwithspinal
muscularatrophycapturedthisdynamic:
Allofmylife,peoplehavebeeninvolvedtoassistmeingetting
dressed,showered,towork/school,etc.Itwasmyhopethatoneday,Iwould
beabletodosomethingreallysignificantforsomeoneelse,likeothershave
alwaysdoneforme.Imetamanwhowasmarriedandveryunhappy.Heand
hiswifehadalittleboyborntothemandthendieatsevenmonthsofage.For
10yearstheyremainedmarried,tryingtohaveanotherbaby.Theywerenever
abletohaveachildagain.Theydivorcedandhebecamemyfriendandlover.
Hetoldmeofhislifesdreamofhavinganotherchild.Igotpregnantfromhim
andhadamiscarriage.Igotpregnantagainandhadanectopicpregnancy.(No
lossofmytube,thankGod!)Ashottookcareoftheproblem.Igotpregnanta
thirdtimeourbeautifulsonwasbornon12/20/98.Ihaveneverfeltas
gratefulforanythinginmylife.Iwasactuallyabletogivesomethingbackto
someone.Me,whowassupposedtodiebeforeIwastwoyearsold.
Itisgratitudethatenablesustoreceiveanditisgratitudethatmotivatesustoreturnthe
goodnessthatwehavebeengiven.Inshort,itisgratitudethatenablesustobefullyhuman.

AboutTheAuthor
RobertA.Emmons,Ph.D.,hastaughtinthe
departmentofpsychologyattheUniversityof

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California,Davis,since1988.Heisfoundingeditor
andeditorinchiefofTheJournalofPositive
Psychology,andisauthoroftheforthcoming
THANKS!HowtheNewScienceofGratitudeCan
MakeYouHappier(HoughtonMifflin).

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