PEER PRESSURE

Peer pressure is a very real issue that affects many of the

teenagers of the world today. Society offers many
misleading advertisements that seem to lead teens in all
the wrong directions. If the youth of today are more
educated, the future of our world will be a lot better off.
There are all sorts of pressures that children face today.
Drinking, smoking, staying out past curfew, having sex
when you are not ready- whatever it may be, sometimes
others put the pressure on you to participate in
something you might not want to do .
Peer pressure is stress of strain you feel from friends and
school mates to act, behave, think and look a certain way.
This kind of pressure can cover everything from fashion
through sex and dating. If you are very worried about
peer pressure it is important to find someone who you
can talk to. Teens today face numerous tensions that can
have an impact on the decisions they make. Sometimes
these decisions are negative ones, including using drugs
or alcohol, sex, violence or just a desire to fit in. Although
peer pressure can be extremely strong and hard to resist,
there are ways to fight it. Studies have shown how peer
pressure alone can change one mind from what they
know is right to making the wrong decision. Also, it has
been said that all it takes for someone to stand their
ground on what they know is right is for one other peer to
agree with them. Inner strength and self-confidence can
help you stand firm, walk away, and resist doing
something when you know better. Paying attention to
your own feelings and beliefs about what is right and
wrong can help you to know the right thing to do . If you

continually face peer pressure and you are finding it

difficult to handle, talk to someone you trust. There are
positive kinds of peer pressure and it can be powerful in
shaping positive behaviors in teens.
Dealing with Peer Pressure

When you were a little kid, your parents usually chose

your friends, putting you in playgroups or arranging play
dates with certain children they knew and liked. Now that
youre older, you decide who your friends are and what
groups you spend time with.
Your friends, your peers ,are people your age or close to
it who have experiences and interests similar to yours.
You and your friends make dozens of decisions every day,
and you influence each others choices and behaviors.
This is often positive its human nature to listen to and
learn from other people in your age group.
As you become more independent, your peers naturally
play a greater role in your life. As school and other
activities take you away from home, you may spend more
time with peers than you do with your parents and
siblings. Youll probably develop close friendships with
some of your peers, and you may feel so connected to
them that they are like an extended family.
Besides close friends, your peers include other kids you
know who are the same age like people in your grade,
church, sports team or community. These peers also
influence you by the way they dress and act, the things
theyre involved in and the attitudes they show.

Its natural for people to identify with and compare

themselves to their peers as they consider how they wish
to be or think they should be, or what they want to
achieve. People are influenced by peers because they
want to fit in, be like peers they admire, do what others
do or have what others have.
Peer Influence Isnt All Bad
You already know that the teen years can be tough.
Youre figuring out who you are, what you believe, what
youre good at, what your responsibilities are and what
your place in the world is going to be.
Its comforting to face those challenges with friends who
are into the same things that you are. But you probably
hear adults parents, teachers, guidance counselors, etc.
talk about peer pressure more than the benefits of
belonging to a peer group.
You might not hear a lot about it, but peers have a
profoundly positive influence on each other and play
important roles in each others lives:

Friendship. Among peers you can find friendship

and acceptance, and share experiences that can build
lasting bonds.

Positive examples. Peers set plenty of good

examples for each other. Having peers who are
committed to doing well in school or to doing their best in
a sport can influence you to be more goal-oriented, too.
Peers who are kind and loyal influence you to build these
qualities in yourself. Even peers youve never met can be
role models. For example, watching someone your age
compete in the Olympics, give a piano concert or

spearhead a community project might inspire you to go

after a dream of your own.

Feedback and advice. Your friends listen and give

you feedback as you try out new ideas, explore belief and
discuss problems. Peers can help you make decisions,
too: what courses to take; whether to get your hair cut,
let it grow or dye it; how to handle a family argument.
Peers often give each other good advice. Your friends will
be quick to tell you when they think youre making a
mistake or doing something risky.

Socializing. Your peer group gives you opportunities

to try out new social skills. Getting to know lots of
different people such as classmates or teammates
gives you a chance to learn how to expand your circle of
friends, build relationships and work out differences. You
may have peers you agree or disagree with, compete
with or team with, peers you admire and peers you dont
want to be like.

Encouragement. Peers encourage you to work hard

to get the solo in the concert, help you study, listen and
support you when youre upset or troubled and empathize
with you when theyve experienced similar difficulties.

New experiences. Your peers might get you

involved in clubs, sports or religious groups. Your world
would be far less rich without peers to encourage you try
sushi for the first time, listen to a CD youve never heard
before or to offer moral support when you audition for the
school play.
When the Pressures On

Sometimes, though, the stresses in your life can actually

come from your peers. They may pressure you into doing
something youre uncomfortable with, such as shoplifting,
doing drugs or drinking, taking dangerous risks when
driving a car or having sex before you feel ready.
This pressure may be expressed openly (Oh, come on its
just one beer, and everyone else is having one!) or more
indirectly simply making beer available at a party, for
instance.
Most peer pressure is less easy to define. Sometimes a
group can make signals without saying anything at all
letting you know that you must dress or talk a certain
way or adopt particular attitudes toward school, other
students, parents and teachers in order to win
acceptance and approval.
The pressure to conform (to do what others are doing)
can be powerful and hard to resist. A person might feel
pressure to do something just because others are doing it
(or say that they are.) Peer pressure can influence a
person to do something that is relatively harmless or
something that has more serious consequences. Giving in
to the pressure to dress a certain way is one thing going
along with the crowd to drink or smoke is another.
People may feel pressure to conform so they fit in or are
accepted, or so they dont feel awkward or
uncomfortable. When people are unsure of what to do in
a social situation, they naturally look to others for clues
about what is and isnt acceptable.
The people who are most easily influenced will follow
someone elses lead first. Then others may go along, too

 so it can be easy to think, it must be OK. Everyone

else is doing it. They must know what theyre doing.
Before you know it, many people are going along with the
crowd perhaps on something they might not otherwise
do.
Responding to peer pressure is part of human nature, but
some people are more likely to give in, and others are
better able to resist and stand their ground. People who
are low on confidence and those who tend to follow rather
than lead could be more likely to seek their peers
approval by giving in to a risky challenge or suggestion.
People who are unsure of themselves, new to the group,
or inexperienced with peer pressure may also be more
likely to give in.
Using alcohol or drugs increases anyones chances of
giving in to peer pressure. Substance use impairs
judgment and interferes with the ability to make good
decisions.
Pressure Pointers
Nearly everyone ends up in a sticky peer pressure
situation at some point. No matter how wisely you choose
your friends or how well you think you know them, sooner
or later youll have to make decisions that are difficult
and could be unpopular. It may be something as simple
as resisting the pressure to spend your hard-earned
babysitting money on the latest technology that
everybody has, or it may mean deciding to take a stand
that makes you look uncool to your group.

But these situations can be opportunities to figure out

what is right for you. Theres no magic to standing up to
peer pressure, but it does take courage:

Listen to your gut. If you feel uncomfortable, even

if your friends seem to be OK with whats going on, it
means that something about the situation is wrong for
you. This kind of decision-making is part of becoming selfreliant and learning more about who you are.

Plan for possible pressure situations. If youd

like to go to a party but you believe you may be offered
alcohol or drugs there, think ahead about how youll
handle this challenge. Decide ahead of time and even
rehearse what youll say and do. Learn a few tricks. If
youre holding a bottle of water or a can of soda, for
instance, youre less likely to be offered a drink you dont
want.

Arrange a bailout code phrase you can use

with your parents without losing face with your
peers. You might call home from a party at which youre
feeling pressured to drink alcohol and say, for instance,
Can you come and drive me home? I have a terrible
headache.

Learn to feel comfortable saying no. With

good friends you should never have to offer an
explanation or apology. But if you feel you need an
excuse for, say, turning down a drink or smoke, think up a
few lines you can use casually. You can always say, No,
thanks, Ive got a belt test in karate next week and Im in
training, or No way my uncle died of cirrhosis and Im
not even looking at any booze.

Hang with people who feel the same way you

do. Choose friends who will speak up with you when
youre in need of moral support, and be quick to speak up
for a friend in the same way. If youre hearing that little
voice telling you a situations not right, chances are
others hear it, too. Just having one other person stand
with you against peer pressure makes it much easier for
both people to resist.

Blame your parents: Are you kidding? If my mom

found out, shed kill me, and her spies are everywhere.

Speak up: If a situation seems dangerous, dont

hesitate to get an adults help.
Its not always easy to resist negative peer pressure, but
when you do, it is easy to feel good about it afterwards.
And you may even be a positive influence on your peers
who feel the same way often it just takes one person to
speak out or take a different action to change a situation.
Your friends may follow if you have the courage to do
something different or refuse to go along with the group.
Consider yourself a leader, and know that you have the
potential to make a difference.
Everyone talks about peer pressure on teens, but just
how bad is it? Odds are, its not as bad as most parents
think. Parents may lay awake at night worrying about
what other kids will force their children to do. But "when
we talk to young people, they tell us this vision of peer
pressure is extremely rare," says Stephen Wallace, senior
advisor for policy, research, and education of Students
against Destructive Decisions (SADD).

Teens rarely strong-arm each other into trying risky

things. Instead, friends play a more subtle role in your
childs decisions. Teens are more likely to hang out with
other teens that do the same things. For example, a study
by researchers at Columbia University shows that kids are
six times more likely to have had a drink if their friends
often drink alcohol.
The good news? You can have a more powerful positive
effect on your teen than you may think.
Teen Peer Pressure Often Comes From Within
Teens often feel internal pressure to do the things that
they think their peers are doing. "Most kids wildly
overestimate the prevalence of alcohol and drug use,"
says Wallace, who wrote the book, Reality Gap: Alcohol,
Drugs, and Sex -- What Parents Dont Know and Kids
Arent Telling.
Parents who want to dispel the myth that drugs and
alcohol are an adolescent rite of passage can simply cite
the facts. A long-term, national study of adolescents in
grades 8, 10, and 12 shows that many typical teen
behaviors are actually losing popularity.

While 71% of teens have tried alcohol by the end of

high school, far fewer drink to get drunk.

In 2010, 27% of students said they got drunk in the

past year. This is down from almost 40% in 1997.

In 2010, 34% of students had ever used drugs and

only 27% had done so within the past year. Teens who
had ever used drugs peaked at 43% in 1997.

Close to 31% of students reported having ever

smoked a cigarette, compared to almost 54% in 1991.
Certain drugs get a bad rep as their risks become more
widely known. When teens think their friends will look
down on them for taking a drug, theyre much less likely
to use it. Unfortunately, this does not apply to drug use
overall. As some drugs fall out of favor, new ones hit the
scene. And it often takes years for teens to understand
their new dangers.

Parents Assume You Outrank Peer Pressure

Your child can adopt a new dress code and lingo to fit in
with friends, and still remain keenly aware of your
thoughts and opinions. "Parents influence is much more
powerful than most parents realize," says Tom Hedrick,
founding member of The Partnership for a Drug-Free
America. "Not wanting to disappoint their parents is an
important barrier to teens using drugs."
Take Time to Connect and Talk With Your Teen
Being a teenager is often a dance of push and pull.
"Adolescents want to be independent and dependent at
the same time," says Benjamin Siegel, MD, pediatrician
and fellow of the American Academy of Pediatrics
committee on the psychosocial aspects of child & family
health. "On one hand, they want to assert their
independence. On the other, they need their parents."

Your teen probably feels intense pressure to fit in. She

may not know how to talk about it. She may not talk
much at all. It may take extra effort to connect with her,
but chances are she hopes you will. "The more we
understand what kids are going through, the more
empathic we can be towards them," says Siegel.
Be the 'Bad' Guy
Your rules and structure give your teen a framework for
understanding the world, even if he protests. When
Wallace asks teens what their parents could do to
discourage drinking, the answers were surprisingly
simple:

Talk to us. Teens say they want to know what their

parents think and how they make decisions.

Punish us. Teens who break rules typically wait to

see what happens. If there are no consequences, the
rules dont matter.

Limit overnight visits. Not having to go home can

be too much freedom to handle.

Wait up for us. Knowing they have to face mom or

dad, or both, in a few hours makes most teens think twice
about the shape theyll be in when they get home.

Teach Relationship Skills

"Kids need friends. Building relationships is an important

part of their development," says Siegel, and parents have
a role in this learning process. You know that relationships
are often messy. Your child may not have figured that out
yet. Siegel suggests frequent conversations that will help
your child develop friendship skills. Open with questions
such as:

What do you like about your friend?

What are you getting out of the friendship?

What happens when you dont agree with your

friend?
Observe and Comment on Teen Peer Pressure
"Some children come under the influence of a close friend
who constantly acts out," says Hedrick. If this sounds like
your child, your challenge is to share your point of view
without criticizing the friend. Lay your worries on the
table in a matter-of-fact way. For example:

"You seem to break the rules every time Johnny

comes over."

"I get calls from other parents when you and Johnny
hang out."
Some situations call for dramatic action. Fleissner recalls
a family who moved across state lines to remove their
son from a destructive friend network. He didnt like it at
the time, but thanked his parents years later.
Visualize Peer Pressure

Role-playing and visualization can help kids imagine what

they would do to get out of the pressure zone. "Often,
kids find themselves in the moment, doing things they
never thought they would do," says Wallace. Help your
child practice warding off peer pressure by playing a
game of "What if?"

What if you were at a party and someone had a

bottle of pills?

What if you were about to get into a car and realized

the driver was drunk?
The game can serve two purposes. First, it lets your child
develop a peer-pressure game plan, which can include
calling you. Second, it lets her know she can say no and
blame it on you. "My mom would kill me," is a perfectly
good way out of these situations.
Help Teens Learn From Their Missteps
No matter what you say or do, your child may still mess
up. As upset as you may be, your child probably is, too.
Fleissner says parents should be ready to help their
children take responsibility for their mistakes, and
support them in moving on. This is an important time to
help a child look at how he makes decisions. Siegel
agrees. "Parents should ask questions that encourage
self-reflection," he says.
Students Peer Groups in High School
High school is an important period of time in an
adolescents life. It is at this time that students are
making decisions about their course taking and future
educational and career plans. It is also the time when

parental authority is being challenged by peer pressure.

The influence of peers can be both positive and negative.
On the positive side, it can serve as an important
incentive for adolescents to perform well in school.
On the negative side, peer influence can lead to discipline
problems and delinquent behaviors both inside and
outside school. Thus, the values of peers can play an
important role in students educational experiences and
outcomes.
For this analysis, the following values of peer groups 3
were examined:

importance of school learning and achievement--the

extent to which a student's friends care about learning in
school;

importance of social activities--the extent to which a

student's friends value the social aspects of adolescent
life; and

importance of engaging in delinquent activities--the

extent to which a student's friends are interested in
pursuing such activities as using drags, having sex, or
drinking (These items were only asked in the 12th grade.)
The major findings of this study include:

Compared with students with friends who showed

little interest in learning, those with friends who cared
about learning had better educational outcomes--they
were less likely to drop out of school and more likely to be
enrolled in an academic program, graduate from high
school, and continue their education after graduating.

On the other hand, students with friends who were

interested in having sex, drinking, and using drags
experienced less desirable educational outcomes. These
students experienced a higher rate of dropping out of
school and a lower rate of being enrolled in academic
programs, graduating from high school, and pursuing
postsecondary education.

The kinds of friends (as described by their values)

that students made in high school differed according to a
student's gender, social class, race-ethnicity, and
academic background. Compared with their male, low
socioeconomic or academically weak counterparts,
students who were female, from high economic level
families, or with strong academic backgrounds, were
more likely to have friends who cared about school
learning and were less likely to associate with peers who
were interested in engaging in delinquent activities.

In the 10th grade, black or Asian/Pacific Islander

students were more likely than white students to have
peers who cared about learning.

There did not appear to be a relationship between

the extent to which students chose friends who valued
social activities and their educational outcomes.
What kinds of friends do high school students have?
Are their friends interested in learning and studying
and in participating in social activities? Do they
belong to a group that likes to indulge in risk-taking
activities? Do their patterns of peer association
change over the course of their enrollment in high
school?

While the majority of high school students reported

having friends who cared about learning, some of them
also said they had friends who were highly interested in
social activities. More than one-third (36 percent) of high
school sophomores said that their friends considered it
very important to be popular with their peers. About one
fourth of the sophomores also described their friends as
being very interested in playing sports ( 29 percent and
having a steady boyfriend or girlfriend (22 percent).
These proportions, however, declined after two years,
when the majority of the sophomores were seniors. In the
senior year, for example, one-fifth of these students (21
percent) described their friends as being interested in
playing sports, one-fourth of them (28 percent) thought
that their friends were very interested in being popular
with their peers, and less than one-sixth of them (16
percent) said their friends considered having a boyfriend
or girlfriend very important.
A small proportion of sample members reported that
they had friends who considered having sex, using drugs,
and drinking very important. The influence of these
friends on an adolescent's school learning would be an
important topic for researchers to pursue in the future.
Peer Groups According to Students' Academic
Characteristics
Do male and female students differ in their choice of
friends in high school? Do students from different social
and racial-ethnic backgrounds have different kinds of
friends? Do academically oriented students associate with
like-minded peers?

Peer groups. Three factors emerged from this factor

analysis, each
corresponding to a distinctive value students perceived
their friends to have. The first factor consisted of the
items relating to the degree of importance students'
friends placed on school learning. The second factor, also
seen consisted of items that described the degree of
importance students' friends placed on social activities.
The third factor, based only included items that measured
the extent to which students' friends placed importance
on engaging in delinquent behaviors. Each factor
described the kinds of friends students had in high school
i.e., learning-oriented peers, socially active peers, and
those oriented toward delinquent activities.
All three factors were continuous standardized variables,
with a mean of 0 and standard deviation of 1 on the
sample used in the study. When a student had a higher
score on a particular factor (e.g., factor I), this indicates
that his or her friends valued more these things
summarized by this factor (e.g., school learning).
Students could also have friends that valued more than
one factor (e.g., socializing and academics.
Male versus female students:-Male and female
students differed with respect to the value orientations of
their friends. Male students were more likely than their
female counterparts to have friends who took school
learning seriously (i.e., the factor mean for females is
0.16, larger than that of-0.12 for males). Males, on the
other hand, were more likely than females to associate
with peers who placed emphasis on social activities.

Male and female students also differed in the extent to

which they associated with another type of friend--i.e.,
one who valued engaging in delinquent behaviors. Male
students were more likely than female students to report
that they had friends who considered it important to
engage in delinquent behaviors.
Minority versus white students:- Asian/Pacific Islander
students were more likely than white students to report
having learning-oriented friends. On the other hand,
Asian/Pacific Islander students were less likely than their
white peers to have friends who were interested in sex,
drugs, and drinking. This finding is consistent with a
recent study conducted by researchers from Stanford
University and the University of Wisconsin that found that
Asian-American students tend to form academically
focused groups that study together, encourage each
other, and strive for high grades (Leslie 1996).
Contrary to past research that has hypothesized a
"misidentification" with academic achievement among
black students 10th-grade black students were more
likely than white students to describe their friends as
being academically minded This difference, however, was
not apparent after two years. Black students were less
likely than their white counterparts to describe their
friends as being interested in engaging in delinquent
behaviors. Previous studies indicated that black students
tend to disdain academic accomplishment, sometimes
dismissing it as "acting white" . Whether this explains the
change observed here needs further investigation,
however.
No differences were found between Hispanic or American
Indian/Alaskan Native students and their white

counterparts in the extent to which they associated with

learning-oriented friends. While Hispanic 10th-graders
were less likely than white students to have friends who
emphasized social activities, no other differences were
found between minorities and whites in the association
with such friends.
Students from different socioeconomic
backgrounds:-students from high economic level
families were more likely than low economic level
students to have friends who emphasized school learning
and achievement. This pattern appeared to be quite
stable throughout the high school years and is consistent
with previous findings by Coleman ( 1961 ) and
Hollingshead (1949). Interestingly, students with different
economic level backgrounds did not differ significantly in
terms of their association with peers who emphasized
social activities or engaging in delinquent behaviors.
Students from different academic backgrounds:There is reason to believe that students who care about
learning are more likely to associate with peers who share
this interest than those who have less interest in learning.
Where three measures of academic background were
examined: (1) educational expectations in the 10th
grade;
(2) Average GPA in reading, mathematics, science, and
social studies from the 9th to 10th grades; and
(3) Whether a student had ever repeated a grade since
the first grade.
As expected, students who had higher educational
expectations, obtained a higher GPA, and had never

repeated a grade were more likely to have learningoriented friends throughout high school years than those
who had lower expectations, had a lower GPA, or had
been retained in a grade. Differences were especially
large between students who expected to pursue college
or graduate education and those who expected only high
school graduation and between students who had an A
average and those who had a D average.
Academically strong students were less likely than their
academically weak counterparts to have friends who
valued delinquent behaviors. However, few differences
existed in terms of students' association with peers who
were interested in social activities. This suggests that
while students with different academic backgrounds
distinctively chose friends who cared about (or did not
care about) learning, or who thought engaging (or not
engaging) in delinquent behaviors important, they
equally liked (or did not like) to have friends who were
fond of social activities.
How Does Students' Peer Association Relate to
Their Educational Outcomes?
What are the educational outcomes for students who
associate with learning-oriented friends, "socially active"
peers, or peers who think having sex, using drugs, and
drinking are very important?
(1) Reading proficiency level in the 12th grade;
(2) Math proficiency level in the 12th grade
(3) Dropping out of school at least once between 9th
and 12th grade;
(4) Enrollment in an academic program in high school;
(5) High school graduation and
(6) Postsecondary education attendance

Since students' gender, race-ethnicity, and socio

economic were related to the kinds of friends they chose
and it is also well known that these demographic
characteristics are correlated with the set of educational
outcomes examined here, these relationships were
investigated after adjusting for these student
characteristics. For reading and mathematics proficiency
level in 12th grade, a composite score of 10th-grade
achievement in reading, mathematics, science, and social
studies was also included for additional adjustment.9
Students with friends who placed importance on pursuing
sex, drugs, and drinking differed markedly in terms of
their educational performance. For instance, students'
association with more such friends was related to a
higher rate of dropping out of school, a lower rate of
being enrolled in an academic program in high school,
graduating from high school, and continuing their
education after high school. It should be noted that all of
these relationships were estimated after controlling for
students' Socio economic, race-ethnicity, and gender, and
that for reading and mathematics proficiency, the
estimation also controlled for 10th-grade achievement.

Teen Peer Pressure

One thing all teens have in common is the fact that they
will have to face teen peer pressure at some point during
their developmental years. Whether they realize it or not,
teenagers experience social pressures almost constantly.
As a parent, you should be aware of the types of peer
pressure your teen will face as teens in order to prepare
her to do what's right.
Types of Teen Peer Pressure
As you're probably aware, there isn't just one way to
pressure kids into doing something. Helping your teen
understand the different types of peer pressure is one
way to help her stand strong against it. Below is a list of
different types of teen peer pressure:

Direct peer pressure - This type of pressure is in a

teenagers face and can seem unrelenting. For example,
"All of us are going to skip history class today, come with
us or else you'll be the only who isn't there." Direct teen
peer pressure makes kids feel guilty about whatever
decision she decides to go with. This type of pressure
involves direct confrontation, and it's hard for teens to
come up with an excuse on the spot that others find valid.
You and your teen can come up with a variety of excuses
beforehand to counteract peer-pressure requests. "I've
already missed too many days, so I can't, but I'll meet up
with you after school." "I'm on a sports team, and I'll get
kicked off for skipping class."

Indirect peer pressure - Indirect peer pressure can be

just as convincing as direct peer pressure. Think about it,
what was the last big trend that everyone had to have?
Did you run out and buy it? If you did, you gave in to
indirect peer pressure. When your teen wants to wear a

certain clothing brand, she's longing to fit in with her

peers. This type of pressure can also account for kids
drinking, smoking cigarettes, and having sexual
intercourse. If your teenager's friends are drinking on the
weekends, she may feel like she's missing out on
something. Additionally, if your teen's friends always talk
about how they're having sex with a boyfriend/girlfriend,
your child might want to have sex just to be able to talk
about it with them. To fight indirect teen peer pressure,
explain to your child the consequences of smoking,
drinking, having sex, etc. and provide her with alternative
choices. You can also get teens involved in sports and
extracurricular activities to keep them busy and focused
on other things.

Positive peer pressure - Yes, positive peer pressure

does exist. Maybe your child decided to join a sports or
youth activity because all of her friends did. Additionally,
if your teen is involved with a school sponsored activity,
it probably prohibits smoking and drinking, and
teammates often convince each other to stay away from
parties and other such events that promote these types
of activities.
The most important thing you can do to help your child
deal with teen peer pressure is to be there for her and
shower her with your support. Be the shoulder your teen
can cry on and the person she can tell anything to. If you
build a solid communication path with teenagers early on,
then they're more likely to ask your advice on a particular
situation or activity before they participate in it

Positive Peer Pressure

When you hear the phrase "peer pressure," it usually

conjures up seedy scenes of a group of teens chanting
and bullying another kid to do something he shouldn't.
From drugs to smoking and sex and everything in
between, peer pressure is a scary thing for most parents
to think about. But, did you know that not all peer
pressure is a bad thing? It's true!
Positive Peer Pressure Does Exist!
Peer pressure can be both good and bad. While you are
already familiar with the bad kind, there are some good
things that can come out of peer pressure as well.
Positive peer pressure happens when pressure from
friends motivates kids to do the right thing, follow the
rules, be nice to others, etc. But it is the negative peer
pressure with which parents need to be concerned. Keep
these tips in mind when it comes to dealing with negative
peer pressure in preteens and teens:

Discuss what peer pressure is with your child. Try

doing some role playing so he is familiar with some
scenarios that can teach him how to say no and avoid
giving in.

Focus on building a healthy self-esteem in your child.

Those kids who have a lot of confidence are more likely to
not give in to negative peer pressure.

Teach your child he should never try to pressure

other kids into doing bad things. While we all like to think
of our children as the ones being pressured, somebody's
kids are doing the pressuring!

Pay attention to his peers, and if you happen to find

some that are negative, try to steer them in another
direction. Redirect your childs time to better influences
and positive peer pressure.

You can help to keep teens behavior in check by

establishing and sticking to routines. This can easily be
done and monitored by using behavior charts.
Dealing with Peer Pressure
Peer pressure issues are quite common with preteens and
teens, and there is very little you can do to avoid them all
together. But with some consistency and discussion, you
can successfully help your child navigate his way around
those issues without succumbing to the negative
pressures he may encounter.