Ten Engaging Conversations: Asking Provocative Questions to Provoke New Ideas Cha...

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Ten Engaging Conversations: Asking

Provocative Questions to Provoke New Ideas
November 9, 2009
tags: asking questions, Communication, Engaging conversations, leadership, learning, listening, Trinamics
Today, I have a very special guest whose topic is of significant importance and interest to how we
function as leaders at work, home or in the community. Debbie Payne is Senior Principal Associate
and President of DP Leadership Associates, and Founder and Partner of Deberna International. In
her discussion, Debbie presents eleven provocative questions to spark conversation and inquiry.
As a leader of yourself, your family, your community or within your organization you have a
responsibility to yourself and others. You have a responsibility and accountability to use your best
thinking, to be ethical, and to lead wisely.
What conversation is your organization having today? Odd question? Perhaps, but perhaps not, how
well do we listen to the conversations in our organizations today? Do we think it important to know?
Are the conversations respectful, intellectual, valuable, deeply thoughtful, filled with new creative
ideas, authentic, and coach-like? Or are they directive, guarded, calculated, venting, and nonengaging? What stimulates a conversation? Generally it is a question.
What helps us be the best leader we can be? Asking provocative questions to provoke new ideas,
different thinking, or more curiosity helps those around us see us as leaders. Great questions take time
to answer. To create them we need to really listen carefully and to craft a question that does not elicit
an obvious answer.

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According to Jill Konrath, renowned author and speaker, provocative questions force you to look
beyond the obvious, to analyze, assess and make decisions and demonstrate your expertise and
enhance your credibility, cant possibly be answered without seriously considering their business
situation.
Terry J. Fadem in his book The Art of Asking, Ask Better Questions, Get Better Answers he says,
provocative questions are used to expand the thinking of a group to provoke or stimulate creative
thinking.
To encourage more engaging conversations in your organization have a look at some of these ideas
and share them with your colleagues and your teams. Perhaps we can collectively shift the culture and
engage more people, simply by improving our approach to conversation. Notice the provocative
bonus question. As we become courageous in asking provocative questions, and in expecting them,
we will find that our own leadership wisdom increases.
1. Explore a new topic. Search for a new mutual topic of interest to explore with someone you have
had other conversations with. Get agreement to explore it intensely. Do it together and notice the
engagement between you sparkle.
2. Ask someone to teach you. Notice someone who knows something you would like to learn. Ask
them to show you how or teach you. Be attentive, curious, and encouraging as they share with you
some new knowledge.
3. Listen deeply. Engage another in conversation by giving 100% focused, present, and deep
listening. When someone feels heard their value, worth and engagement rises.
4. Allow silence. When the person you are speaking with pauses, allow the silence to hang suspended
and continue to hold a focus with them. They will take a breath, realize you are truly engaged and
continue sharing their thoughts.
5. Coach. If someone expresses a need to work towards a goal ask if you can coach them. Use gentle,
powerful, and thoughtful questions to engage them in conversation, listen well, and suspend your own
judgement helping them to find their own answers.
6. Share a poem. To illustrate, or spark conversation in a new way, share a poem. Read it aloud and
encourage communication to stem from the poem stimulating different thoughts and engaging
different parts of the brain.
7. Explore what works. When faced with an issue or problem instead of problem-solving ask
questions about what does work. Delve and dig deep to find the gems of good ideas, good processes,
and excellent work. It engages people in new ways.
8. Notice someones passion. When you know someone has a passion find an article, an object, an
idea, or piece of information and share it with them. Engage them in conversation on their passion and
sense the energy and vitality.
9. Converse with youth. Youth provide a window to the world without baggage. Learning with youth
brings an engaging energy to old topics. Find ways to connect to the youth of the world and ask them
to engage you in their conversations about the world.
10. Define leadership. Leadership as a word has no recognized definition. Create a definition with
other leaders, explore what leadership looks like, find examples of leadership, and engage in leaderful
conversations.

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11. Bonus: Ponder a quote. Quotes are words spoken and remembered. They often inspire and make
us think. Create a question from the quote and engage in conversation with others about the meaning
and application to your work. You may find it surprising to see the shift in your thinking and the level
of your engagement.
Most things still remain undonea glorious future. Ingvar Kamprad
Coaching Question: What is it that is undone that I would like to do?
About Debbie Payne, MA:
Debbie is the Senior Principal Associate and President of DP Leadership Associates, and founder
and partner of Deberna International. Shes the author of over 25 curriculum publications and two
books. Her latest book Tri-namics Power of One, Two, Three: Provocative Questions for Leadership
Wisdom (2009) is co-authored with Erna Hagge, founder of Coaching Services at the University of
BC.
Debbie is a leadership consultant, facilitator and educator with over 25 years experience in adult
education and consulting. She has certificates in management from the University of Western Ontario
and in Organizational Behaviour from Heriot-Watt University in Scotland, and an MA in Leadership
from Royal Roads University. You can reach her at 604.209.5069, by email
debbie@dpleadership.com, or view her blog Leadershipspace. Meet her at LinkedIn.
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