1

ANN IN FASCIST PURGATORY

by

Whitley Hodges

Copyright 2009
All Rights Reserved

This novella is a work of fiction, an urban fantasy, and it is entirely the product of
the author’s mind. Any similarity to any persons living or dead, is strictly
coincidental.
No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner
whatsoever without permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in
critical articles or reviews.
Other kinds of requests for permission to quote any part of this novella
should be addressed to the author with the quote and its context by sending same
to the author at his email address: whodges2004@yahoo.com.

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 EDITOR’S PREFACE

Make no mistake about there being prejudicial themes in this novella about a
frenetic uber-slut woman lawyer who was also a writer and television
commentator in New York City back in the early part of the 21st Century.
Whitley Hodges, the author, has openly confessed to being most prejudicial in
writing this story. In revealing the facets of his central character’s personality and
her political views, he also had to write about her political party and how it
became what it is today. While he is a seasoned writer who would normally try to
avoid prejudice in his writing, it would appear that he had little choice in this
work.

The story deals with how the once noble political party of Abraham
Lincoln and Dwight David Eisenhower degenerated into the party of Dick Cheney
and George W. Bush. It deals with the truth about how the Republican Party self-
destructed in a train wreck of stupidity when it became the party of the ultra-right
wing of American political and religious society between 2000 and 2008 Common
Era.

As Whitley told us, “the Republican Party is dying from the head down.
As to fascist issues, I tried and tried to find a balance between the parties, but it
was all to no avail. Each time I examined the GOP, I ran into its leaders who still
do not regard the stupidity of Ron Brown during Katrina, Dick Cheney in ordering
Torture of prisoners, George Bush-43 saying God told him to attack Iraq, and
Sarah Palin as a vice presidential candidate as problems, rather they are held up as
badges of honor.”

Today the Republican Party yet presents images of its leaders as heroic
and religious men of impeccable statute. Whitley Hodges discovered that to
accurately report on these people, he had to tell the truth, i.e., they are fascist,
draft-dodging, yellow-bellied “Chicken Hawks” with a constituency of red neck,
bible thumping, tobacco chewing, and beer swilling jerks who constantly work
stupidly to elevate themselves to higher levels of stupidity. As seen in the mind of
Ann, the central character in the book, the Republicans have engaged in blow-
hard, pompous, and mean-spirited attacks against Democrats, Independents,
Libertarians, Progressives, and innocent bystanders. Such harsh and aggressive
conduct by the party’s leaders and its radio talk show and television news show
hosts, left our author with little room to write objectively about the Republicans.
Try as he might, he found objectivity almost impossible each time he tried to write
in the “fair and balanced” theme of FoxNews, one of the Republican Party’s right-
wing cable television networks.

Should the reader feel the need to challenge the author as to his
implication that Republicans are both fascists and stupid, just remember the old
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Latin adage: res ipsa loquitur (the thing speaks for itself).

Editors

4
1CHAPTER 1

The Fall from Grace

THE TALL, THIN, BORDERLINE, blue-eyed, blonde, bitch lawyer was just
beginning her workday in New York City. She climbed out of her bathtub, and
stood nude before her bathroom mirror.

Fuck him! What did he mean when he said I was a borderline

personality disorder? Fuckhead! she reflected on the comments of a rather drunk
Democrat psychologist she had met at a party the previous evening. What is a
borderline personality? Someone who is on the border of something? Speeding
on the borderline? Borderline of politics?

The psychologist had commented on a well-known New York author

who had characterized her as being a borderline personality disorder. Then, in his
intoxicated state, he volunteered to corroborate the author’s findings. He told her
that the borderline was very impulsive. He laughed, and said that her attack on
the widows of the victims of the 9-11 tragedy was a good example of that conduct.
Then, he went on to say that borderlines' relationships are usually very shallow.
“I am not shallow, goddamn you! I am a highly educated Doctor of Law
from a major university!” she growled at him.

“Moreover, heh, heh, Ann, these people have senses of abandonment —

usually arising from their parent’s negligent childcare,” he chuckled.

"I had wonderful parents!” she growled in another lie. She quickly had
flashes of memories of her father's coldness towards her, and her mother's
constant whining about marrying beneath her family's social status.

“I won’t even comment about the BPD’s unstable self-image and poor
sense of self. What you should consider,” he mumbled through his stupor, “is that
the BPD often engages in strange threats and gestures towards others. Most BPD
women your age also have great fits of anxiety, mood swings, and dysphoria.”

“Is there one fucking thing you think I don’t have, you bastard?’ she
hissed.

“Oh, Ann, it’s no big deal. You can cope with it with the proper
medication. I’ll be happy to prescribe some Xanax for you,” he said smirking.

“Fuck you — you pinko son-of-a-bitch!” she growled as she turned and
walked away from the grinning Ph.D. without telling him she was already on
Xanax.
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 Liberal bullshit! Planted at that party by the Clinton and Pelosi Clans.
They’re all out to get me. Well, I won’t be on the border of the liberal line of that
shrink’s commie pinko bullshit! Where is Joe McCarthy when I need him?

She first dried her body with a warm towel. Then she put on her men’s’
whitey-tighties. Finally, she pinned her little metallic American flag lapel pin on
the front of the cotton jockey shorts.

“Then, the fuckhead went through the party referring to me as the ‘BPD.’
I’ll BPD that muthafucker!” she growled aloud.

She began drying her hair with a blower as she practiced her Jerry
Falwell beatific look.

“The son-uv-a-bitch said I was ‘splitting.’ What the fuck is splitting?

Fuckhead amateur psychologist! Called me an ‘archetype’ of the BPD. The
asshole said I was splitting between my oral and anal fixations,” she declared even
louder.

She finished drying her hair. She turned her attention to her whitey-
tighties. She loved the look and the strength of the ribbed cotton fabric of the
men’s jockey shorts. The cotton fabric was strong enough to allow her wearing
her little American flag, as well as the little Boy Scout merit badges her friends
had secretly given to her during her White House visits.

‘Turd Blossom’ is so thoughtful she reflected as to her good chum. And, Condi
— only Condi truly understands me. ‘Turd Blossom’ gave Condi a little flag for
her whitey-tighties also. It's a girl thing.

She continued practicing her Jerry Falwell beatific look. Next, she
practiced her Mitt Romney beatific and charismatic bright-eyed look. Practicing
these two looks always made her eyes hurt. She didn't understand how Jerry and
Mitt did them so well without discomfort. Then she changed into her Tammy
Faye Bakker fluttering eyelash look, which she used on weak-minded
fundamentalist southern Republican men mostly from South Carolina and
Mississippi.

Her thoughts remained so intense that Ann continued raving loudly to

herself. “And, my own shrink fucked over me! What the Hell does he know?
Dysthymic! I am not dysthymic! Son-uv-a-bitch said I had low self-esteem. So
what if I do have a hormonal swings and a poor appetite? And, I do have
insomnia — when I work hard. I do have losses of energy. It takes a lot of
strength to sneak into the U.S. Senate’s toilets to read the walls for materials for
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my books. The bastard said I have feelings of hopelessness, poor concentration,
poor self-image, and that I’m dysthymic! And, I heard him tell his nurse that I
was as 'crazy as a hat made from live chickens.' Cocksucker!”

Next, she looked in her bathroom mirror and continued practicing the
Bakker, Falwell, and Romney looks. The Falwell and Romney looks were
supposed to give one charisma and draw people to their wearers. She practiced
the looks over and over: slight pleading smile, head looking up slightly, and open
smiling eyes.

Mitt Romney always uses that same frozen look during his campaigns.
He really has endurance. His eyes must hurt at the end of a day.

She was confident her Bakker-Falwell-Romney looks could help deflect

some of the slings and arrows being hurled at her by recent critics who continued
claiming she was basically nuts.

So what if I did attack those 9-11 widows? They’re all Democrats. Out
spending their husband’s life insurance benefits. And . . . how the hell do I get a
filthy rich husband in a burning building?

She had recently observed Glenn Beck using the Jerry Falwell look on
his TV programs. The hysterical open-eyed look, and a voice straining in
outrageous incredulity gave him a sizeable audience of double-digit I.Q. viewers.
She was confident her addition of the Tammy Faye Bakker look could help her
attract a wide range of weak-minded double-digit I.Q. Republican Neocon men.

I’ll knock’em dead in South Carolina. Their fascist politicians will just
luuv my Tammy Faye fluttering eyelashes look.

She began brushing her long, stringy, blonde hair. As she brushed, she
started talking to herself about her need for her own T.V. show. “Damn! I need a
FoxNews show like Beck. If he can use the Falwell and Romney looks that
effectively, I can do even better. Besides, he has no education and I have a
doctorate in law.”
Finally, she practiced her Sarah Palin creative artificiality look that one
used during T.V. interviews and debates when they knew absolute hogwash about
a subject. Any woman like Palin, when asked something about complex foreign
policies or economics, could use the creative artificiality look and play dumb;
usually it was accompanied with artificial remarks like "You Betcha!" or "Aw,
come-on" or "All Hockey Moms disagree with you" or “Let’s all field dress a
Moose,” or the like.
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 Plus, I have the constant brushing of my long blonde hair out of my face
ploy. Every time a host questions me about some complex subject, I start
brushing my hair out of my face to distract the attention of the viewer. It’s just
like one of Sarah’s ploys she thought as she practiced brushing her long hair out of
her face, and letting it fall back over her right eye ready for another sweep of the
hand in defense to an intelligent question.

Ann again let her thoughts continue aloud. “The damned commie pinko
T.V. news producers and hosts have turned on Sarah. They actually demanded
that she make intelligent statements during her interviews. Well, I have used her
creative artificiality defense in many of my recent T.V. appearances. I like her
style. Maybe she and I could run as a presidential team on the 2012 Republican
ticket. You becha! Then again, I heard that she and ‘Jabba the Hut’ Limbaugh
were a possible 2012 ticket.”

She turned and sat on her commode to do her toenails in a new flaming
red polish. She began watching FoxNews on the 36-inch HDTV set installed on
the wall waist high facing her deluxe golden crapper. As she continued her
grooming and watching the morning news, she suddenly became upset with the
comments of a Democrat who was once again attacking John McCain. He had
said “we cannot forever hide the truth about ourselves, from ourselves. McCain is
nothing more than a master of glorifying all of his failures.”

“He is not a failure! Even if he did crash three jet airplanes through
some slack moments in his concentration. John gets a little angry at times, and
when he is angry he becomes befuddled, and he makes little mistakes flying and
landing jet fighters. Besides . . . the public’s so dumb” she slowly reflected, “he
can always write another book glorifying any of his failures — his ghostwriters
are soooo good.”

She rose from her golden throne and began shaving. She scrapped and
shaved the tiny moustache from her upper lip. The resulting scratches caused by
the dull plastic men’s razor left her lip burning. She looked up and saw her men’s
shaving lotion out of reach on the top of her bathroom cabinet.

Crap! What's his name must have put it up there she reflected on her
husband’s habit of tidying up the bathroom.

She took a little footstool and mounted it to acquire the bottle. At the top
of the stool, she heard a New York “liberal” attack the manner in which George
Bush-43 and Dick Cheney would be leaving the White House. In a reflex action,
she tried to turn to look at the screen, cuss him, and flip him a bird, but she lost
her balance and fell.
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 The fall was nasty. Her arms and legs went akimbo, and her head struck
the edge of the bathtub. She experienced a bright, quick flash of white light in the
visual cortex area of her brain. Just as quickly, the light changed to black. She
slid into a black void. She could not feel her body. She could only see a total
blackness. She could hear nothing — not even the beat of her heart.
Am I dead?

* * *

Eva

“GUTEN MORGEN, FRÄULEIN ANN,” a feminine voice with a slight German

accent asked out of the black void.

“What? Who are you? Where are you?”

“Oh, I’m sorry. I forgot the initial blackness,” the voice replied.
“There,” the woman said as the light slowly began returning to the lawyer’s field
of vision, “you should be able to see me in a few seconds. And, we’ll talk in
English.”

As the light became brighter, Ann could see a rather attractive, dirty-
blonde woman about 30-years old seated on a sofa in the living room of a nice
apartment or house. She looked familiar. As she looked around, she realized that
she was lying strapped on a hospital gurney. The woman rose and came over to
her. She released the straps.

“There, Fräulein Ann, you can get up now. Would you like some coffee
or tea?”

“Well, some strong coffee would be nice right now,” Ann replied.

“You can get rid of that hospital gown. You will find some clothing we
copied from your wardrobe in the closet by the window. I’ll get your coffee while
you dress. Might I suggest something summery? It’s rather warm here. Perhaps
a basic cotton dress. Oh, yes. We also got you some of the whitey-tighties you
like to wear,” she said as she turned to leave the room. “Alas, the little medals
you wear on your underwear are still at the hospital.”

Ann put on a pair of men’s whitey-tighties, a cotton bra, and a basic

cotton dress with low-heel penny loafers. She surely missed her little American
flag lapel pin. It gave her a certain feeling of security and comfort when it was
pinned just above her womanhood. Then, she returned to the center of the room.
9
Still somewhat unstable from the effects of her fall, she collapsed in a large,
leather chair at the corner of the sofa. Shortly, the woman returned with a tray
bearing coffee, cream and sugar.

“Still a little dizzy? No bother, it’ll pass in a few moments. Perhaps I

should introduce myself. I’m Eva Braun. I work here to help people like you to
pass-on to their final destination. It’s my job to get you started with your
processing and evaluation.”

“Did you say your name is Eva Braun? Gee, you have the same name as
Adolph Hitler’s mistress. In fact, you look just like her,” the lawyer observed.

“I am that same Eva Braun Hitler. I’m afraid that Adolph and I were a
little before your time. Actually, Adolph married me just before we committed
suicide in Berlin,” Eva said nonchalantly.

“You’re the real Eva Braun? From Nazi Germany? Am I fucking crazy?
What in the Hell is going on here?” she almost shouted her question to Eva.

“Well — Ann — it’s not Hell. You’re in Purgatory. More specifically,

you’re in Fascist Purgatory.”

“I’m sorry, Eva,” Ann said in a desperate voice. “Can I call you Eva?
Eva, I apparently am not having a good day. I slipped and fell in my bathroom,
and I went into some kind of god-awful unconsciousness. Then, I wake up
strapped to a hospital gurney — discover you and this room — and you tell me
I’m in Fascist Purgatory!”

“Yes. You see, Ann, here in Purgatory we’re sort of in limbo between
Heaven and Hell. As our client souls arrive, we try to make them comfortable.
We always assign them to divisions that are closest to their lifestyles in the normal
world. Since you are a fascist, the intake angels assigned you to Fascist
Purgatory. Oh, Ann, you’ll meet some people here you’ll just love.”

“People? What people?” Ann asked curiously.

“Oh, other fascists like you. Other people who have proven their desires
to be fascists in their respective countries and governments in the world. And,
you’ll just love our therapists.”

“Goddammit, this is crazy! Maddening! I am not a fascist! I am a

compassionate conservative Republican!” Ann exclaimed.

“Oh, Ann, your American conservative Republicanism and Fascism are

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relatively the same,” Eva replied. “Now, what you need to do is to relax, and
adapt to your new surroundings. Everything you need is in the apartment. If you
need something, just dial me at 1945 on the phone. Now, get some rest. You
have a big day tomorrow. You’re going to meet your case manager. He’ll call on
you about nine in the morning.

* * *

Holiness and Heroism

AT PRECISELY NINE AM, Eva Braun knocked on Ann’s door. As Ann opened
the door, she saw a young European man dressed in an Italian dress suit and
wearing highly polished Italian leather shoes. He looked as if he was about thirty
years old. He had the bearing of a man in charge. He seemed familiar to her.

“Ann, permit me to introduce you to your case manager. This is Benito

Mussolini,” Eva said smiling.

“Mussolini? Oh, my Gawd! I read your essay on Fascism. You’re the

former dictator of Italy. The founder of modern Fascism,” Ann said as her eyes
opened and she quickly adopted her Jerry Falwell beatific look.

Incantato, Sig.na Anna. Benvenuto al purgatory fascist. Eva mi dice che

siate un vero fascist fanatic, Benito replied.

“Oh, Benito, she doesn’t speak Italian yet,” Eva stated.

“O.K., we’ll speak in English. It is my pleasure, Anna. Eva tells me you

are a true fascist,” he said in almost perfect British English as he entered the room.

“Well, I’ll leave you two to get acquainted. Ann, you have another
appointment tomorrow with the Director of Fascist Purgatory. In the meanwhile,
Benito will open your file and begin your evaluation. Auf Wiedersehen,” she said
as she left the room closing the door.

“Please be seated. What do I call you, Il Duce or Mr. Mussolini?”

“Please call me Benito, Ann. After all, I’m your personal case manager,”
he replied.

“Oh, Benito. You knew all of the fascist leaders of Europe before and
during the Second World War. I can’t wait for you to tell me everything about
that period of time,” she stated.
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 “Well, Ann. Several things have happened to me and many other fascist
leaders of that period. Many of us have changed somewhat in our views. Now,
let’s not talk about me, rather let’s talk about you.”

“Funny, you appear to be about thirty years old.”

“Yes, Anna, on this side of the dimensions, we souls are all the same age.
You may have read about how souls are the same age through your studies of
reincarnation?” he inquired.

“No, but it’s a super concept. You mean if I stay here, I will remain
thirty forever?” she asked displaying her Pat Robertson “give me everything
you’ve got in your bank account” look.

He laughed and replied, “Ha! Certainly. The problem, however, is that

you are not scheduled to stay here forever. You are being evaluated as to whether
you can be rehabilitated for reincarnation, returned to your body which is in a
comatose state, be passed down to Hell, or simply obliterated from existence.”

“Obliterated?” she said with a wide-eyed look.

“Obliterated.”

She looked at Benito with apparent fear in her eyes. Her lips were
pressed tightly together. She was slowly wringing her hands together.

“Now, Ann. I’m sure it won’t come to that. There is no reason you
should be obliterated if you can show the staff that you are worthy of
rehabilitation. Now, you mentioned my treatise on Fascism. Perhaps we should
begin there, as it was the foundation of the movement just before and during the
Second World War. In fact, it’s still the foundation of many of the older families
of your Republican Party.

“Jesus Christ! Why do you and Eva keep saying that the Republican
Party is fascist? We’re just neo-conservative fundamentalist and compassionate
Christians.”

“Exactly. But you all exhibit the characteristics Adolph Hitler and I
desired in our followers. Understand, Ann, that Fascism is a state of mind that
should be considered separate and apart from any political movement. Your
people would be fascists even if we painted them with a new name. Basically,
they are people who reject the doctrine of Pacifism. Your military-industrial
complex, oil and gas companies, and your international bankers reject the idea that
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peace is the ideal state. They think the state should be superior to all citizens.
They all also believe that constant war alone is the truly desired state.”

“Why, that’s silly. We are not warmongers!” she said with indignation.

“But you are. Your Republican men, for example, Dick Cheney,
especially think that they are brave holy corporate warriors who reject acts of
cowardice. They claim they are sacrificing in their fights against the evil axes of
the world by keeping America on a constant war footing".

"What-tha-hell is wrong with that if you are fighting evil — like Dick
Cheney has said?" she retorted.

"As I said in my original treatise, such men believe that constant armed
conflict brings them to a high and desirable tension of human endeavor. It is this
high tension that makes them feel they are noble. They are always condemning
Democrats and others while they raise their perceived nobility, and their
commitment to the high tension of armed conflict and serious wars,” he said as he
watched her eyes shift back and forth. "Republican men constantly state that their
military might is the force that elevates men to great decisions affecting lives and
deaths. In America, it’s always accomplished through typical Republican fraud
and deceit.”

“Oh, posh! Certainly, Benito, all great world leaders have had to make
such decisions. I really don’t get your point. And, after all, our Republican men
are the most patriotic men in America — certainly over the sleazy Democrats and
non-committal Independents. And, there's no fraud and deceit. Our Republican
men always represent their positions honestly.”

He looked at her and shook his head in a negative manner. “I’m sorry,
Ann, but your 'Neocons' are not as patriot as the Democrats. In fact, if you take a
look at the hierarchy of the Republican candidates and members of Congress, you
will find only a few on them served in the military fighting for their country.”

“Utter bullfeathers!” she retorted. “Our Republican men are men of duty
who have struggled to keep America free in our military forces. The Demos are
men of socialism and moral corruption and little military service. Pinkos!” she
growled.

“Actually, the Democrats are not even close to being the Marxian
Socialists you refer to. The Marxists evolved into communists who were not
exactly business or democracy oriented. You might recall, Ann, that it was the
Democrats who initiated all of the business solutions to the Great Depression in
your country. The Republicans have been steadfast in maintaining their right to
13
be elitists — not necessarily men of business accomplishment. Plus, they want to
destroy your middle-class to allow the rich a domination over the poor — citizens
they intend to economically enslave,” he said with some seriousness in his voice.

“Bullfeathers!” she growled. “And, are you also telling me the

Democrats are more religious than the Republicans? Huh?”

“Well, Ann, I see you have never spent much time in the Deep South
where most of the fundamentalist black churches are comprised of some rather
conservative Democrats. By the way, do you accept Jerry Falwell’s assertion that
blacks are Bible-ordained minorities?”

“I’ve never given blacks much thought one way or the other,” she said
quickly as her mind began splitting again in an attempt to avoid the cognitive
dissonance his question had created in her Anglo-Saxon, Celtic, and Germanic
subconscious.

"He also stated that women are Bible-ordained minorities. Do you accept
being a lesser human being in the eyes of the fundamentalist Christian men?" he
asked gently.

"I never recall Jerry making any such statement," she said again being
evasive as her mind continued splitting even more as her eyes glazed over.

“Let’s get back on track. You should consider the two classic elements
of the true fascist. First, the fascist believes that true followers of the movement
should be totally absorbed in holiness. Each soldier, each mother, each civilian
worker should be always mindful that they are engaged in a holy quest, that is to
say, the preservation of the fascist state.”

“Well, we Republicans are truly religious people. And — I’m sure I can
speak for all of them — I believe that we are the religious answer for America.
Through the spiritual leadership of men such as Jerry Falwell, Pat Robertson, Jim
Bakker, Jimmy Swaggart and Reverend Moon we can lead America to greatness,”
she said proudly. “I’m a Catholic, but I love those evangelical men also.”

“The second element is that the fascist is heroic. They are followers who
will sacrifice their very lives for the motherland,” Benito said with a tilted head
and smile.

She thought about the second requirement for a minute. “So, we have to
engage in holiness and heroism? Is that what you’re saying?”

“Well, if you’re a fascist leader, you have to claim that you are engaging
14
in those two elements. All of your Republican leaders constantly claim they are
holy and heroic. The truth, Ann, is not so clear as to your leaders. Most of them
are pantywaist little boys."

“Bullshit! Take Rudy Giuliani. Rudy is ‘America’s Mayor.' He was in

New York during 9-11. He actually went near the fallen buildings and got
covered with dust. Didn’t you see him walking down the street away from the
scene covered from head to foot in dust. That was heroic. He led the way out for
the New York City victims of that mess.”

“A damn poor example. He didn’t lead anything or anybody. He was

being paid a high salary to administer emergencies. After the 1993 bombing of
the Twin Towers, Giuliani negligently installed his Emergency Command Center
back into that same vulnerable building complex which was destroyed in the 9-11
tragedy. He knew or should have known it was subject to a second attack. That
does not make him a hero, Ann. Nor do his adultery and drive-by divorces make
him holy. He is what he is. And, only a man like Rudy would try to capitalize on
such a tragedy in which he made so many bad mistakes — sort of like John
McCain does when he fails. He would not have fared well under my command in
Italy,” he replied.

“You mentioned John McCain.”

“Yes, he is a true hero. He is one of the very few Republicans who is a

true national hero. He was captured and kept in a North Vietnamese prison during
the Viet Nam War. I would have been proud to serve with him during wartime.
He is, however, yet adopting the policies of George Bush-43. He is working
stupidly to reach a higher level of stupidity. Try as he may, he cannot divorce
himself from Bush-43. Like the Republican Party, McCain is dying from the head
down.”

“And, there’s . . . there’s . . .Oh, shit! I can’t remember right now as to

the others,” she said stumbling in her thought processes.

“Let me help you with my own observation as to the true holiness and
heroism of your Republican men. It’s a critical part of your rehabilitation. First,
let’s go to the nearest restaurant and have lunch.”

Benito and Ann left her apartment, and began a walk beside the little
stream running through Fascist Purgatory. As they walked along its banks, they
encountered a very large black man coming from the other direction. He was
walking beside a white woman who was listening to his every word with great
concentration. Before reaching Ann and Benito, the couple departed from the
path towards a bench where they took a seat and continued their conversation.
15
 “That man looks familiar, Benito. Should I know him?” she asked
curiously.

“Oh, that’s Dada Idi Amin. The former murderous dictator of Uganda.
Idi’s on the staff here. You’ll get a chance to meet him later,” he replied casually.

“Idi Imin? Ugh! He was a violent African dictator. That is one big,
black, and ugly man. I don’t want to meet him,” she said with disgust.

“Careful, your racial intolerance is showing,” Benito replied. "Plus, Idi

has changed considerably since he came here. He once was a murdering, raping,
psychopathic fascist. Now, he’s a changed man. He changed so much, in fact, we
made him a part of the staff. He’s been very helpful in giving us insight into the
minds of women who are attracted to fascist men. He has an extraordinary
success rate with rehabilitating women fascists."

At lunch, they ordered an Italian organic meal with a large salad. Benito
also ordered some excellent Chianti wine. Then, they returned to their analysis of
the two elements of Fascism.

Ann thought about the previous remarks, and decided to lead the way in
the conversation. “Benito, I know you are sincere, and you want to impress me
with your version of Fascism, and how it relates to my Republican Party, but I’m
afraid I disagree with you on every count — especially as to the heroism of our
men. Our Republican men involved in public office and the media are the most
patriotic and heroic men in America today.”

“Not really, Ann. Most of your Republican leaders are panty-waist

Chicken Hawks."

“For the sake of argument, Benito, if we Republicans are fascists, we are

still democratic in our administration of our public offices. Just look at men like
George Bush-41 and George Bush-43. And, look at the excellent work done by
'Turd Blossom' Rove.”

Benito cringed when she mentioned Rove and his ridiculous Texas
nickname of "Turd Blossom." He sighed and looked off into the distance.

“Ann, the only thing for us to do is analyze your men in public office,
and the men in your media. Perhaps that will give us a clear picture of what we’re
dealing with as to the issues of the Republicans and Democrats.”

“We will come out on top. Our men are the most religious and most
16
patriotic,” she grumbled while munching on a bread stick and quickly drinking
another glass of Chianti.

"Let me see, Ann. Let's discuss a few of your party and press leaders
today. We'll try to survey most of them in the coming days. How about John
Ashcroft, your former Attorney General?" he asked with a cocked eyebrow.

"He is a truly devout Christian and hero of the American people," she
replied confidently.

“When he took office, he covered a Department of Justice statue known

as the ‘Spirit of Justice’ because it showed a woman with bare breasts.”

“Well, the statute was behind the podium where John had to speak. He
did not want a constant montage of breasts in his photos.”

“Ha!” Benito laughed. “Your Republican men have always been

strangely afraid of women’s bodies. O.K. You asked for it. But I assure you,
Ann, you are not going to like what I am getting ready to say. First, have a big
glass of Chianti. Perhaps the alcohol will relax you somewhat.”

Ann allowed Benito to pour a large glass of wine for her. She looked at
him with a rather forlorn appearance on her face. She seemed to sense that truths
about her Republican men were about to be revealed, and she would not want to
hear them.

“At the outset of what I am going to relate to you, it should be prefaced

with this statement. What I believed just before and during the Second World
War, and what I believe today are two different things. Today, I no longer believe
in Fascism. Today, I try to believe in a good form of Democracy as espoused by
the Greeks. Today, I try to be a man of common sense and moderation in all
things political. What I believe today is that every human should love their God
and do nothing to harm their fellow human beings. You may remember that it
was Jesus Christ who left us with those two commandments: love your God and
do nothing to harm your fellow man.”

“This is ridiculous. You mean a former fascist dictator who has

converted back to an old Democratic line of thinking is counseling me on
Christianity and patriotism? Well, we Republicans are also democratic in our
thinking. We believe in the vote. We believe in our representatives being elected
from the people.”

“How about Florida, and the first election of George Bush-43? You
literally stole the election using computer fraud and deceit.”
17
 “Serves the Demos right! They put-up that wimp Al Gore for President.
He’s a wimp!”

“He served in the U.S. Army in Viet Nam during the war.”

“Noooo! Impossible! And, he wanted to destroy the upper classes and

give to the middle and lower classes. Oh, as to John Ashcroft, he must have
served in the military. After all, he was one of the most militant and patriotic
members of the Bush White House," she replied in an optimistic tone.

"Sorry. He went from his mother's apron strings to college, law school,
then into radical neo-conservative fundamentalist Christian politics," Benito said.
"And, how about your good friend, Tom Delay, the former House Majority
Leader?"

"Hey! Tom is a true patriot and my good buddy! I know Tom Delay,
and I assure you he served in the military. Right?" she again said confidently.

"Sorry, but Delay was a classic draft dodger. He avoided serving during
the Viet Nam War as if it were a personal plague. He even made public remarks
about there being so many minorities serving during Viet Nam that they didn’t
leave him a slot to fill. He’s a typical Chicken Hawk. I would have liked to
encounter him during World War Two. I had well-disciplined firing squads for
such men," Benito said with a glassy look in his eyes.

"Oh, this is impossible," Ann said somewhat frustrated.

"And, you are aware of how militant Rick Santorum, the third ranking
member of your Senate is? He also avoided the draft and any service in the
military."

"Well, all of the Bush men served!" she exclaimed.

"No, George Bush-43 served in the Air Guard, but rarely went to
mandatory meetings. In fact, he was A.W.O.L. most of the time. His entire
military service was a sham. And, his brother, Jeb Bush, never served at all."

"Goddammit! George Bush-41 served!" she almost screamed.

"Bingo! — as you Americans say. In fact, he went into the service

during World War Two just after discovering his family was under investigation
for contributing to the Nazi war effort."

18
 "What? Whoa! Whoa! The Bushes involved with you Nazis? You and
Adolph Hitler? No way!" she growled.

"In fact, Prescott Bush, George-41's grandfather, had an empire of

corporations that were notoriously anti-Jewish and pro-Nazi. Prescott Bush and
Bert Walker, his father-in-law, were quite helpful to Adolph and me during our
early years. After the Americans and British got control of their accounting
books, the Bush family suddenly went over to the Allies. They turned on us like
dogs," he said with an apparent distaste.

”Prescott Bush was one of the original founders of the Skull and Bones
secret society. You’re actually saying that the founder of Skull and Bones was
anti-Semitic and pro Nazi? George Bush 41 and 43 both belonged to the group.
It’s one of America’s most loyal fraternal organizations.”

“Prescott Bush is the Skull and Bones man who is reported to have stolen
Geronimo’s skull from his grave, and brought it back to Skull and Bones as a
ritual item. Not only was he a grave robber, but he was an infamous Nazi
sympathizer. Adolph and I enjoyed our relationship with him until he and his
family turned on us in 1942.

“My undergraduate degree is from Yale,” she said with her mind again
splitting.

“Ann, as soon as the British and Americans discovered Prescott Bush and
his friends’ financial support to Adolph and me in 1942, they went over to the
Brits and Americans as counter spies. Their only loyalty was to money, not to any
country or cause.”

"I don't believe . . . I’ve ever heard . . . that story before, Benito."

"Most Americans haven't. The elite Republicans, bankers, and oil

company executives have tried to cover it up. Anyway, American and British
intelligence leaders made Prescott Bush and his American fascists a deal they
couldn't refuse. He and his good buddies turned coat, and served with the
American and British intelligence factions until the end of the war. Since there
were many prominent American and British investors in Brown-Harriman and
other companies owned by the Bush and Walker families, the Allies decided to
simply bury the entire traitorous scandal."

"But George Bush-41 was an American war hero," she said sheepishly.

"Absolutely true, Ann. He is the only one in that entire bunch of fascist
and anti-Semitic American traitors who was truly an American hero and combat
19
veteran. Other than George Bush-41, John McCain, and a few others among your
national Republican leaders, the rest are Chicken Hawks. They are very quick to
rant and rave about sending American youths into combat to die, but rarely willing
to go themselves – or send their children. While others send their kids off to war,
their kids start working on their MBA and Doctor of Laws degrees. The
Republican kids get a huge education and career jump on the kids that served in
the military."

"Could we perhaps discuss this another time," Ann said quickly with a
look of exhaustion on her face.

"Yes, but let me finish with four other so-called heroic and holy men on
your side of the fence. There's Karl Rove, another Chicken Hawk."

"Oh, Karl is so sweet. He gave me my little American flag," she replied.

"The one you wear on the front of your whitey-tighties?"

"You know about that?" she murmured an inquiry.

"Yes. Your Mister Rove never served in the military. He’s a Chicken
Hawk. And, there's Newt Gingrich, well known for his Chicken Hawk
tendencies."

"Wait now, Newt is one of our most heroic military strategists. He truly
understands war and the military," she said in a fatigued voice.

"Wrong. Newt avoided military service. And, of course, there's Bill

O'Reilly of FoxNews. Never served at all. Also, there's the darling of the radical
conservatives and one of their most rabid militants, Sean Hannity. He's a
Republican Weapon of Mass Disinformation."

"Whoa! Sean is friends with all of the military leaders. He is a man's

man. He must have served," she pleaded.

"Never served. He’s a Chicken Hawk. He was a paperhanger with a

construction company when he was failing to obtain a college education. That
seems to be his claim to fame in his search for something masculine in his
background. Ha! I find it very interesting that Sean Hannity and Adolph Hitler
were both paperhangers," he chuckled.

"Jeez. Sean presents the image of being a real man’s man. I thought he
had a college degree. I had no idea —”

20
 “That he’s what your American kids call a ‘wuss’?”

“Could we end our session today? I feel exhausted, Benito. Perhaps we

could continue later," she pleaded with eyes full of water.

“Sure, but let me also relate just a few more points about your heroic
Chicken Hawk men.

“There’s more?”

"Yes. And — never forget, Ann — when we discuss your Neocons'

actions, we're talking about a enduring and typical Republican fraud and deceit."

21
 "Oh, bullfeathers, Benito. Why are you so down and out on the
Republicans," she asked with some anger in her voice.

"You'll hear me using that expression frequently during our counseling

sessions. Anyway, you need to think about your future. Tomorrow you will meet
with the Director of Fascist Purgatory. Well, I have to go. So many fascists, so
little time. Can you find your way back to your apartment?"

"Yes. Thanks for lunch. I would like to walk along this little stream for
a while and reflect on what you said today," she said quietly.

She walked along the little stream looking at its waters swirling and
dancing over its rock-strewn streambed. Prescott Bush? Bert Walker?
Harriman-Brown? Nazi collaborators? Oh, Jesus! My father lost an arm during
the Battle of the Bulge. Is Benito truthfully telling me that the Bush, Walker,
Harriman and Brown families were actually supporting Adolph Hitler's gang
during that phase of the war? And, is Sean Hannity truly a wuss? she asked
herself with tearful eyes.

Typically of the borderline personality disorder, her conscious mind split

back and forth as a defense mechanism. It went from her love of her Republican
men to her father's hatred of the Nazis to enormous cognitive dissonance created
by Benito's revelations about the Bush family.

Typical republican fraud and deceit? Where did he get that phrase
from?

The antisocial overlay of her personality disorders always seemed to be

satisfied if she could write something malicious about a Democrat. She suddenly
felt a deep craving to express something nasty about somebody. Just then, she
saw a little open-air urinal beside the stream. She quickly entered, went into a
stall, took out her pencil, and wrote one of her horribly rhymed limericks on the
white wall and initialed it.

There sits a Kennedy

Broken hearted
Came to shit but only farted
Getting up he took a chance
Walking away he shit his pants

A.H.O'R.C.

"Ah . . . there . . . ," she said out aloud. "I feel a lot better now.
22
CHAPTER 2

Écrasez l'infâme (Crush Infamy)

THE FOLLOWING morning Ann heard a knock on her door at precisely 8:00
A.M. She answered it and discovered Eva accompanying a rather nice looking
man dressed in a French business suit with an open white silk dress shirt. He had
a full head of rather curly hair, and wide and intelligent eyes she found quite
attractive.

"Good morning, Ann," Eva said. "I hope you slept well."

"Ann, permit me to introduce you to François-Marie Arouet, the Director

of Fascist Purgatory."

Enchanté, Mlle Ann. Welcome au purgatoire fasciste. J'espère que nous

pourrons vous aider avec une réadaptation signicative, he said as he took Ann's
hand and lightly kissed it on the fingers.

"Oh, François-Marie, she doesn't speak French — or Italian for that

matter," Eva interjected. "She does speak some German. If she stays here long
enough, perhaps we can program her with the major languages of Earth."

"Ah, I see. Very well, we will speak English," he said in almost perfect
British English. "What I said, Ann was that you are welcome to Fascist
Purgatory. I hope that we can help you with your rehabilitation so you can make a
recovery.”

"Well," Eva said. "I'll leave you two alone. I have to get back and work
on a seminar notice. Soon, my Adolph is giving a lecture on why he invaded the
European nations around Germany, which resulted in World War Two. Oh, I
remember helping my Adolph and Dr. Goebbels write his first speech on that
subject. Well, Auf Wiedersehen," she said as she departed.

"Arouet? Arouet? Where have I heard that name before?" Ann asked
her guest.

"I'm sorry, Ann, but you probably know me by my non de plume,

Voltaire," he responded.

"Ohhhh . . . Holy Cow! My gawd! You're Voltaire!"

The French philosopher smiled, took a seat on the sofa, and opened his
file. "Ann, you might wonder why I have been chosen by the Big Gal to be the
23
Director of Fascist Purgatory. Perhaps I should explain."

"Yes, it does appear a little confusing. After all, you were not a fascist
by any means," she stated.

"Well, I was involved in class warfare. The war involved the citizens of
France against the corrupt ruling classes of royalty that caused our French
Revolution, and contributed to your American Revolution. I have seen class
warfare at its finest. Fascism denies the majority, just like French Royalty, the
Church and — I might say — your Republican Party. In effect, they deny human
society. Fascists, like my French royalists, denied equality of my French citizens.
The ruling class of France never did understand what universal suffrage was
about," he said.

"But Benito Mussolini said that Fascism denied that class-war could be
the preponderant force in the changing or transformation of society," she said
curiously.

"Well, he assumed that he would eliminate classes. He eventually found

that this was almost impossible. While Benito and his cohorts imposed their
collectivism and authority on their populations, they never did actually eliminate
class war. While they claimed to seek a century of collectivism, they only
accomplished making Italy and Germany creatures of the so-called 'ethical' state,"
he added. "The fights between the classes never ended."

"I never thought of it that way. Oh, Voltaire," she said as she used her
Tammy Bakker fluttering eyelash look, "I could just listen to you all day."

"Unfortunately, Ann, we have to discuss your situation. We need to see

if you can be rehabilitated. Now, let's get down to business. First, there's the
matter of your insisting that God is a male. You are becoming quite famous here
at FP as to your adamant stand on God being masculine. You need to be careful
that your acts and omissions do not become infamy as to your character. It could
cost you dearly."

"I think I'm beginning to understand. It's just that every church in the
Christian world teaches that God is a male. The Jews and Muslims teach that God
is a male. Why would I believe otherwise?" she asked somewhat piqued.

"Well, here at FP we never, ever try to give the Creator human

characteristics. Ann, who are we little mortals to attempt to describe any attribute
of the Creator of the Universe? Here, we have finally realized that all we can do
is stand in awe of the Big Gal and Her creation. We cannot describe Her, give
Her human features, nor speak for Her. We call God the 'Big Gal' out of our
24
devotion to Her. We can only theorize her having a feminine nature since she is
constantly giving birth to new planets, star farms, and galaxies in this universe.
But no one can limit God to two human genders. Plus, She always appears to us
as an elderly woman."

"But surely, the Pope, and the leaders of the major Christian religions can
speak for God. Surely, they are ordained to speak for Him — Her?"

"Ann, you cannot speak for God, only about Her. No human can speak
for God. By the way, tomorrow you will meet one of your ancestors. You are
part Irish, are you not?" he asked.

"Yes, I'm German and Irish," she replied.

"Tomorrow, you meet with the Princess Scota, one of the founders of
your Celtic tribes. She will begin your education on the history of the Judeo-
Christian-Islamic faiths. It's a complex tale. It seems that all of our current
misinterpretations began with Moses when he came out of Egypt. Now, I have to
return to my office, as I have several new clients arriving. So many fascists, so
little time," he said as he rose.

Ann showed him to the door, gave him her Tammie Bakker fluttering
eyelash look, and said goodbye. As Voltaire left her apartment building, she
began thinking about ways she could attract him to her. The young Frenchman
with the warm and wide eyes gave her a tingling feeling down in her whitey-
tighties.

Maybe the innocent little girl look would work, she reflected.

She walked over to the entrance mirror and look at herself. She thought
of fixing her hair in pigtails with bow ribbons, and wearing a cute little plaid shirt
with white knee stockings in the fashion of a ninth grader. Perhaps this would
make him attracted to her. Then, she sat on her sofa staring at the wall for almost
an hour as her mind split in several mental pathways.

* * *

Go Down Moses!

ANN WAS SEATED at her patio table having her breakfast. Suddenly, she saw a
light to her side. A bright aura of yellow and blue colors pulsated beside her. A
very attractive young woman stepped out of the aura onto her patio. She was
wearing a beige business suit with medium heels. She had a beautiful olive
complexion with wide and intelligent green eyes. Her long red hair fell in a
25
tumble on one side of her shoulders.

"Hello, Ann." the woman said. "I'm sorry for popping in, but I've had a
busy schedule, and I've had to rush all morning."

"Jeez! You just popped out of midair."

"Well, yes. After all, you are in a supernatural world. Fascist Purgatory
is on the other side of your normal time continuum. Over here, we have powers
that you rarely see back on Earth. Now, let me introduce myself. I am called
Scota. You may recall reading about me if you ever studied your Celtic history."

"Yes, I know the story. You're an Egyptian princess. You're the

daughter of an Egyptian pharaoh. You married a prince from the Black Sea and
created the Scot and Irish peoples."

"Exactly. Well, more accurately, I married Prince Niul of the Scythian

tribes, and we helped create the Scot, Irish, Welsh and Brittany tribes over several
centuries."

"But why do we have to go back over three thousand years to resolve my

issues here?" Ann asked curiously.

"Because, Ann. You, like most Christian, Jewish, and Muslim women do
not know the true story of the foundations of your faith. It is important for you to
know who Moses was, and who my father was. It is important for you to know
the history of both Egyptian and Sumerian pantheons, and how they led to the
creation of the three western religions. Besides, the Big Gal insists that we teach
this to all female candidates prior to reincarnation."

"Jeez! Do all of you refer to God as the 'Big Gal?'”

"It's not up to us. We know we can't really give God a sex. But, when
God is appearing as to us as a little old lady, we certainly call her the 'Big Gal.'
It's God's decision, not ours. In recent years, she has always appeared to us as a
female, and never a male. Down to business. Ann, I've been reading your file.
Let me suggest that you get off the gender thing with the Big Gal. You are a little
human soul like the rest of us. Even though your stupid ministers and priests back
on Earth try to convince you they can speak for their male God, suffice it to say
they cannot. The sooner you accept this, the better you will be as to your
rehabilitation standing."

"I'm sorry, but my religious teachers always taught me that we were

made in God's image, and that God is a male. I'm having a hard time with this
26
gender thing."

"Following the faux pas in the Garden of Eden, which I will get to in a
minute, the male-dominating priests created God in their image."

"But — that would be blasphemy!" Ann exclaimed.

"Exactly," Scota said. "It's sort of like your George Bush-43 going to
war over contrived allegations of Weapons of Mass Destruction. It was typical
Republican fraud and deceit. Now, let's consider a couple of things about Fascism
before we go into your history lesson. First, you will recall that Benito and Hitler
had a two-prong test of Fascism. Well, there are other things for you to consider.
For example, it's not just the holy and heroic components they mentioned, but we
should recall that Benito and Hitler visualized the State as superior to all things
human."

"Listen, there is nothing wrong with that. Just look at the American State
created by George Bush-43 and Dick Cheney. For the first time in American
history, we have a State serving all fundamentalist Christian values, and the neo-
conservative Republican State is clearly shaping the duty and aims of my country
totally along those lines of thought," Ann said smugly.

"That's true," Scota acknowledged. "At least you are finally beginning to
see that Bush and Cheney are fascists. Your leaders act as absolute as my family's
pharaohs did during my time on Earth. My family, the priesthood, and the
military leaders in Egypt all maintained that any group or individual was to be
regarded solely in their relationship to the State. Even in Egypt in the Fourteenth
Century before the Common Era, the State totally dominated the growth and
development of the citizens. The State was the conscious power over all citizens,
and it had a will and personality of its own. Our State was overly concerned with
the afterlife, and the worship of the huge Egyptian pantheon of gods. Very much
like your Neocons who worship God, Jesus, Mary, the Holy Spirit, saints, angels,
devils, cherubim, and Wall Street, inter alias. That is to say, before my uncle
began pushing for the worship of Aten," she said casually.

"I remember. It was your uncle Akhenaten who started the religion of
the one sun god Aten," Ann stated confidently. "We Americans have been taught
that story since grammar school."

"True, and the Aten religion had been around for some time among the
various Semitic tribes. You may also recall Aten is also referred to as Adon in the
Old Testament. Anyway, Akhenaten wanted to escape the worship of Egypt's
huge pantheon of gods that he blamed for all of Egypt's disasters. He ran straight
into the fascist control of the priesthood and military. It was very much the same
27
state of affairs we see in the United States today where the average citizen runs
into the demands of your Military-Industrial Complex."

"Well, I do see some parallels. But Akhenaten did not overpower the
existing forces in his government. I wonder what ever happened to him?" she
asked.

"Oh, Ann, Akhenaten was also known as Moses."

"Impossible!"

"And, My father was the Pharaoh Smenkhkare, his half brother. When
my father became a Zadoc priest, his name was changed to Smenkhkaraon, which
signified his high 'Ra" spirituality. You know him by the last three syllables of his
name, A-ra-on or Aaron. After the Aten fiasco, the half-brothers Moses and
Aaron were given a deal they couldn't refuse by the fascist forces in Egypt. They
had to leave or be executed.”

“Jeez, is this for real?”

“Yes. It’s for real. You getting the true history. My father married me
off to Prince Niul of the Scythian tribes, and I left Egypt under his protection. My
uncle Moses and my father went into the desert with a small group of Semites,
Blacks and Whites, and other mixed peoples from northern Africa.”

“No, no. Moses was a Semite, not a black. This is liberal insanity!
Moses was a Semite baby who was found in a floating basket among the rushes.”

“Ann, Semites are not white! You whites are a minority in the world.
Most of us folks are of color, including me. I am of North African and Semitic
and Hyksos bloodlines — as are you.”

Ann’s eyes glazed over. Her mind again began quickly splitting over the
mention that she might have black blood somewhere in her family tree.

“Okay. But Moses was found by a member of the pharaoh's court. He

was not a pharaoh. And, this Smenkhara . . .whatever person, I've never heard of
him."

"Actually the story of Moses and the bullrushes comes from the ancient
Akkadian King Sargon the First," Scota said calmly.

"And, how do you get Moses out of Akhenaten?" she asked.

28
 "The Egyptian word mos truly means ‘heir’ in English. And, Akhenaten,
formerly known as Amenhotep IV, was truly the heir apparent from his father,
Amenhotep III. He inherited the throne of Egypt when his father died. Then he
changed his name to Akhenaten to honor his new sun god. Please just assume that
what I say is true. Your apartment's library contains extensive materials on the
subject. After you study the history for a few days, you will see it all fits into
place."

"So, Akhenaten is ‘The’ Moses? He’s the one who fled Egypt with the
military at his heels?" Ann asked slowly.

“When they left, the priesthood and the military forces were both
breathing down their necks. It's all documented in Exodus in your Old Testament
— in a vague and fraudulent way. And, there is another consideration as to
Moses."

“And that is?”

"Actually, there were two Moses. Ah-mose was a Semitic ruler who left
Egypt with his people around 1500 before the Common Era. He is the one chased
across the Nile by Egyptian military forces. This departure was primarily caused
by the eruption of the volcano at Santorini. The effects of that eruption plagued
that part of the world for centuries. It caused tribes like the one of Ah-mose to
seek food and shelter across the Nile in the north. Akhenaten was the second mos
who fled with a small group of people into the Saud Desert."

"Two Moses? Then the Old Testament is wrong," Ann stated with some
resignation.

"Well, Ann, you should give the ancient scribes their due. They did not
have the Internet or vast libraries to help them write accurate histories. Now, let's
jump ahead in time. After about twenty-six years in the Saud desert, your Moses
returned to Egypt the second time. He had learned that the public anger over his
acts for Aten had diminished. After meeting with the Pharaoh, he was given even
more people the royal family, priesthood, and military did not want to feed and
shelter. Moses left with a rather large group of wild and wooly people the
Egyptian leaders were happy to see go. Moses was still subject to the jurisdiction
of the Viceroy Panahesy at Kush, and his high priest Jethro at Mt. Serabit al-
Khadem in the Saud Desert. Although they traveled throughout the Desert areas,
they remained under Jethro's and Panahesy's protection. You will recall Moses
married Jethro’s daughter Zipporah, and had two children with her.

"Yes, and that marriage broke the heart of Miriam, his wife."

29
 "Correct. Now, as I stated, before his expulsion from Egypt, Moses had
appointed his cousin, Panahesy, as the Viceroy of the Upper Nile. Since he owed
Moses a favor, he gave him as much protection and support as was possible.
Moses' tribe, however, grew too large for the region. The lands around Mt.
Serabit al-Khadem, primarily a mining center, were not very productive
agriculturally, so he lacked enough food and sustenance for his growing numbers
of people, goats, sheep and camels. High Priest Jethro and Viceroy Panahesy told
Moses he would have to go towards Canaan to seek more fertile and productive
lands for his growing numbers."

"Well, it certainly makes sense," Ann said seeming somewhat interested.

"But, I don't see where this is leading. What does Moses and his tribes have to do
with my situation as a New York City lawyer in Fascist Purgatory?"

"Quite simply, you are a product of the original confusion caused by the
first exodus by Ah-mose, and the second exodus by Akhenaten or Moses. Jethro
and Panahesy gave Moses a workable set of laws to help control the wild and
wooly people in his various tribes. It was also with Jethro, Panahesy and Moses
that there was a blending of the Sumerian deities and the Egyptian Deities. It was
with Moses that we obtained the concept known as YHWH."

"But YHWH is the name that God gave Moses on Mt. Sinai. I still don't
see the connection."

"The name YHWH was given to Moses by Viceroy Panahesy and his
High Priest Jethro. They also supplied him with the Ten Commandments."

"Oh, no! God Almighty gave Moses those laws engraved in two tablets
of stone when he spoke to God on the mountain. I saw Charlton Heston when he
came down that mountain in the movie version after talking with Jehovah.

"Actually, Ann, they were carved on a small stone atop Mr. Serabit Al-
Khadem. You could carry the stone in your hand. And, the commandments came
directly from a section of the Egyptian Book of the Dead called the "Pharaoh's
Negative Covenants." As a girl training to be a priestess of Isis I had to memorize
them. The commandments were taken from those covenants, and given to the
contentious people beneath Moses in an attempt to control them."

"If this is true, it means I have been lied to all of my life by my ministers
and priests."

"Well, in all honesty, your priests’ seminaries do not allow them to

discover the truth about their faiths' foundations. The leaders of the religious
houses all engage in constant fraud and deceit — like your Republicans. They all
30
are what our staff members here in FP call ‘mythomaniacs.’"

"Alright. You're my ancient ancestor. I assume you are telling it to me

straight. So, Moses got the name YHWH and his commandments from Jethro and
Panahesy. So what?"

"Well, you have to understand what YHWH means. It is not the name of
God. It is a tetrad, i.e., the name of four gods."

"Whoa! This is new. I don't understand."

"The letters Y-H-W-H comprise a tetragrammaton. That is to say, a

name comprised of the first letters of four words or names. In ancient Sumer, the
name was originally I-A-U-E, which is pronounced the same as the Jewish Y-H-
W-H, or ‘Yah-way.’ The tetragrammaton stands for Inanna, Ashtoreth-Ninlil,
Utu, and Enlil. They were the four deities of the Anunnaki pantheon ruling Earth
at the time of Sumer. The spelling became Y-H-W-H when the Jewish scribes
changed the names of the gods over to the Hebrew language; the tetrad was
spelled with the letters Yod, He, Vau, He of that language’s older alphabet. It's a
common problem. Names of deities change with the various spoken and written
languages of tribes and nations. For example, the modern English version of the
name is Jehovah."

"I never heard of those Anunnaki gods."

"Most people never have, and that's the way the priesthoods want it.
Actually, Ninlil and Inanna are mentioned in the Old Testament, but with different
names. Now, let’s move on. What is significant is that the story of Adam and
Eve in the Garden of Eden is very important to you, if you are a Christian. It is
with the Sumerian pantheon that you can learn the true story of Adam and Eve,
and the horrible frauds called 'Original Sin' and 'The Fall.'"

"No big deal. Eve ate the forbidden fruit, God caught her and Adam, and
kicked their asses out of the garden."

"Quaintly put, but no brass ring. And, there were 950 original Anunnaki
deities that came to Earth under the command and control of Lord Apsu and Lady
Tiamat who were the ruling deities of this universe. They were distributed
throughout the galaxy with various responsibilities as to management, evolution,
etcetera."

"Sorry, but Reverend Jerry Falwell taught me not believe in evolution,"

she said firmly.

31
 Scota smiled a twisted smile at the mention of Falwell.
"Anyway, a small family of Anunnaki deities were given the jurisdiction
of Earth and the Solar System. In addition to Inanna, Ashtoreth-Ninlil, Utu and
Enlil, Lord Enki was also working on Earth. Now, let me stop for a moment and
tell you about their duties."

"Enki? The name seems familiar."

"Enki or Eo was the brother of Lord Enlil, the chief administrator of

Earth and the Solar System. Enki is very important, as he was the science officer
of the Anunnaki. He and his consort Nin-khursag were in charge of all science
and genetics in their laboratory in Sumer. You will recall that science laboratory
as the Garden of Eden. Anyway, Enki and Ninhursag had two children, Adama
and Eve, who were also known as Atâbba and Kâva in Sumerian. They were
jointly called the Adâma. The two main branches of the scientific studies of Enki
were called the Tree of Life and the Tree of Knowledge. Nin-khursag was not a
full deity. Her hybrid children Adam and Eve could not be legally given full
knowledge of the science of the Anunnaki. To do so would give them immortality
and magical powers. So, Enki forbade Adam and Eve to ever become part of the
major studies being conducted on Earth and throughout the Solar system."

"Enki was the serpent in the Garden of Eden? This is turning into a
complex science fiction story."

"Yes, and it is that complexity that has given the priests so much
dominance over humans through the centuries. It’s the way you lawyers work —
complex language and procedures give you command and control over the
layman. Anyway, most people are simply too damn lazy to study their religions.
As to the secrets in his father’s lab, Adam could not resist; he wanted full
immortality like his father. So, he began tinkering with the science in his father's
laboratory. Eventually, he made a mess of things, and came under the scrutiny of
Enlil and Utu. Lord Enlil was the chief administrator, and Lord Utu was the
administrator of justice. Over Enki's objections, they decided they could ill-afford
Adam becoming too powerful. So, they simply barred Adam and Eve from the
so-called Garden of Eden."

"That's it? What's so important about that tale?"

"Well, Ann, when the male-dominated priesthoods tried to write about it

in scriptures, they could not suffer the idea that the male was the cause of
humanity being denied Anunnaki benefits. So, they flipped the scriptures over,
and wrote that it was Eve who disobeyed her father and plucked the forbidden
fruit from the tree.”

32
 "Those bastards! Oh, fuck! A frame job! So, if it was Adam who
disobeyed Lord Enki, this means that the woman has been wrongfully punished
for centuries over the so-called 'Original Sin' that she did not commit," Ann said
with a somewhat wild look in her eyes.

"Exactly. Saint Augustine of your Catholic Church hammered the final

nails in the woman's coffin when he came up with the 'Original Sin' concept. Like
most married priests, he hated his wife and women in general. He hated his
women so much that he carefully crafted the 'Original Fall' condemnation and
punishment for their imagined breach of Lord Enki's commandment. Ann,
millions of women have been raped, enslaved, tortured, and murdered in the name
of Saint Augustine's 'Original Sin' concept. Millions of women have been
oppressed by the all-male priesthoods of the Jewish, Christian, and Islamic faiths
since the times of ancient Sumer and those of the dethroned Egyptian pharaoh
Moses."

"Those bastards!" Ann exclaimed. "But why would our priests engage in
such a malicious conduct? They are supposed to represent what is good in
society. It doesn't make sense."

"Your Catholic Priests, Jewish Rabbis, and Islamic Imams engaging in

homosexual behavior and constantly raping little children of both sexes does not
make sense either," Scota replied as she watched Ann cringe.

"It's awful," Ann quietly said.

"And, the simple fact is these groups of men hate women. They have
always especially hated the power women gained with childbirth. The women
could add members to a tribe, the priests could not." Then, Scota leaned
forwarded and touched Ann's hand as she said, "Ann, they hated and feared the
menstrual flag more than women have ever known. They have an inordinate,
pathological hatred and fear of the menstrual flag. Sort of like the extreme right-
wing members of your political party fear women in general."

"Those bastards! But menstruation is the cleansing of a woman's body in

anticipation of the conception of a beautiful child. How could they be so sexist?"
Ann said with a wistful look ignoring the remark about her Republican men.

"I know, Ann, that you have wanted a child," Scota said gently.

"It's been hard on my husband and me . . . my schedule and all," Ann

said, eyes blinking rapidly, as they did when she was lying.

"Oh, Ann, we know its hard to get him to perform when he is so afraid of
33
having lust in his heart. It's even harder when he keeps wearing that ridiculous
three-piece suit to bed along with his lace-up, wing-tip shoes. Then, when he
tries to consummate his husbandly duties, he cannot do so," Scota stated
somewhat clinically.

"You . . . know . . . everything?" Ann said, eyes tearing, a downward turn

to her lips.

"After all, I am one of your ancestors. I'm concerned for you. We Celts
were doing just fine before the fascists entered the picture, and perverted our men
into thinking like your neo-conservative men."

"I do admit that some of them are a little strange. I just don't know what
to do," Ann said. "How can I start a family without the tools?"

"Oh, Ann. Since the 1940's, American Republican women have all had
Democrats in their woodsheds — so to speak."

“But how did the Republican men get so many women to side with
them?”

"Constant brainwashing by all-male priesthoods. Imposing a fear of an

everlasting hell-fire on women. Over the centuries, they have engaged in constant
fraud and deceit, all in a deadly manner, and always at the expense of women,"
Scota replied with some distaste in her voice. "Sort of like your current leaders
who always engage in typical Republican fraud and deceit.

"Those bastards! Oh, noooo . . . ," the blond bitch lawyer said softly.
"I've been fucked over by my church and its male priests. I've been fucked
continuously by those bastards since my birth."

"Quaintly put. Now, Ann, I'm sorry, but I have to go. So many fascists,
so little time. Think about what I told you today. You will find several books in
your library shelf on the subject of the Anunnaki, and how the ancient Sumerian
and Egyptian religions contributed to the modern formations of Judaism,
Christianity, and Islam. Perhaps you should read some about them before our
next meeting. So long," she said as she disappeared in a golden aura.

Ann sat on her sofa with her mind racing and splitting. Her anger about
the Original Sin fuck job, and her deep desire to be a good fascist pulled at each
other. She retrieved two bottles of Chianti from her fridge and returned to the
sofa. As she began drinking the wine, her eyes glazed over, and she went into a
deep fugue. She was depressed on one hand and extremely angry on the other;
and so her mental splitting went until dawn.
34
* * *

The Doctor Makes a House Call

ANN HAD EXPERIENCED a very bad night on the sofa. She had vacillated
between extreme anger and disappointment after learning that Eve did not pluck
and eat the forbidden fruit in the Garden of Eden. She went to her library and
obtained two large books on ancient religion. As she studied the history of the
Anunnaki and western religion, she became more and more angry. She recalled
all of the Sunday School teaching she had experienced as a little girl. Her teachers
had fraudulently portrayed Enki as both the Evil Serpent and God Almighty.
Adam was treated as the original creation of God, and Eve was fraudulently
treated as a clone made from his rib.

"Those bastaaaarrrds!" she screamed loudly as a deep blue aura began

glowing beside her. She turned and looked at the aura, and saw a young man in a
black three-piece suit and a portfolio appear before her.

Just then, the telephone rang. Ann looked at her guest and said, "Please
excuse me. Let me answer this, and I'll be happy to receive you."

The deep voice of Idi Amin was heard over the phone. "Ann, I forgot to
tell you something. We had a cancellation this morning due to a candidate being
eradicated, so we are rearranging your schedule. You are to see Dr. Sigmund
Freud at your apartment this morning."

"My God! Freud?" she exclaimed as she looked at her visitor. "It's O.K.,
Idi, he's just arrived. Thank you for calling me."

"Also, Ann," Idi began a parting remark. "I would like to show you my
penis sometime this afternoon. You might as well see my Tool of Ecstasy. It is
very ample. It is big enough to split you open with ecstasy. You'll just love it."

"Fuck you, Idi!" she shouted as she slammed the phone down on its
hanger.

"Ah!" Dr. Freud said, "I see you have not yet seen Idi's Tool of Ecstasy.
He does that to all the women here at FP. You have a choice of completely
ignoring him, or allowing him to "split you open" as he says. Now, I am Doctor
Sigmund Freud. Since your German is still not that good, let’s do the consultation
in English. I'm here to counsel you about your psychiatric problems."

"What . . . problems?" she asked in a strained voice.

35
 "Well, Ann, you are a borderline personality disorder with antisocial
overlays. I suspect you are also bipolar. And, you have problems with splitting,
some paranoia, and you get quite dysthymic at times. And, we should discuss
your eating habits, as you are prone to lose excessive amounts of weight. While
you're here, we also want to test your current tendency to experience late luteal
phase dysphoria."

"Late luteal what?" she inquired.

"Super PMS. We also need to discuss your antisocial, obsessive-

compulsive writing of poorly rhymed limericks and graffiti on the walls of urinals.
And, of course, we need to discuss normalizing your sex life."

"I don't know if I can take any more of this! Why don't you bastards
simply obliterate me?" she replied as she suddenly broke-out in tears and sobs.

"This is good, Ann," the physician said gently. "You are finally breaking
down. It's the sign that you are beginning to admit you have problems. There is
hope now that you realize that you are a victim of typical Republican fraud and
deceit. Now, let's talk about your sexual problems."

"I don't have any sexual problems," she hissed.

"It's all sexual, Ann. Now, consider the modern religious leaders that
have caused you and other women so much trouble. Most religious male leaders
have their brains in the heads of their penises, and these dickheads control the
Christian, Jewish, and Muslim men in charge of their respective houses of
worship. Their sexual frustrations were passed-on to women like you through
their warped teachings."

"As I understand it, Doctor, you are reported to have a fixation with sex.
Everything you ever wrote turned around sex and more sex. Why am I to pay
attention to a sex pervert?" the anorexic blonde growled.

"What you say is true. But, Ann, we need to examine the sexuality of the
modern male to see how much you are affected by it. For example, the entire
Islamic movement is powered by the denial of sexuality of young boys and girls at
a very early age. By segregating the boys and girls of Islamic communities at the
age of three or four, the boys never experience any sexual contact with girls, nor
any observation of the development of young girls around them when they are
growing up." He leaned forward and gently touched her hand and asked, "Do you
remember how your parents restricted your life from home to church and back?
Remember, how all of your contact with boys was structured to carefully control
you at your home, school, and in all social settings?”
36
 "Yes," she said sheepishly."

"Well, Ann, the little Muslim boys have the same problem. As they
reach their biological maturity, i.e., age twelve or thirteen, their hormones are
pumping and they are horny as Hell. But, the hormones have no place to go
unless one of their male imams engages in homosexual conduct with them ―
which they do frequently. Additionally, in the Islamic fascist world all of the girls
are covered from head to foot. These boys don't even know what a young girl
looks like after her body has filled out."

"But, even in the Christian communities, it was improper for nice girls to
have such social contact with boys at that age," she asserted.

"Ann, do you remember hearing about your girlfriends who were

making-out in the back seats of their parents’ cars, and how much fun they had.
Remember hearing about the beach and lake parties you were not allowed to
attend? Remember the house parties your parents forbade you from attending?
You were precluded a lot of a normal girl's social and sexual development during
these years."

"Dammit, Freud! I was a not a slut in high school!" she almost shouted.

"Anyway, back to the Muslim boys. They become so suppressed — so

sexually frustrated. Their frustration turns to anger, and their anger turns to
violence," he continued.

"Well, what you say about Muslim boys is probably true. But, how the
Hell does this relate to me?"

"Oh, Ann. Everything that happens to the suppressed little Muslim or

Jewish or Christian boys does relate to you. Such sexual frustration does relate to
little blue-eyed blonde white girls from middle-class American families. Maybe if
you had had some more freedom, and warmth from your father, you would not be
so sexually frustrated, and prone to anger. If your father had been warmer
towards you, you would not strike out at others so much. You would not have
your vicious antisocial streak."

"Oh, fuck! This is getting out of hand," she exclaimed. "I totally
disagree with everything you have said, and I would appreciate it if you would
leave."

"I'll leave in a minute. I do have a busy schedule. So many fascists, so

little time. Now, let's take the little Muslim boys again. As a lawyer, you should
37
certainly be interested in how they can be driven to great criminal acts. If you
combine their isolation from girls with the Islamic Imams promising them they
will have seventy-two palaces with seventy-two perpetual houri virgins awaiting
them when they go to paradise, they are ready for the journey at that moment. So,
the Imam instructs them to go blow themselves up with explosives so they can
become martyrs. As martyrs, the Koran promises them they will go immediately
to paradise to be with their prophet, Allah, along with the seventy-two perpetual
virgins."

"Those bastards! But why are you telling me this?" she asked.

“Because your Republican fascists act in the same manner. Remember,

Ann, if there is anyone anywhere having fun or experiencing sexual freedom,
Republican neo-conservatives will track them down and pass a law against their
activities. Just look at South Carolina. As in the Muslim families, Republican
families also oppress their children sexually. By the way, I believe you will recall
that you watched a recent program on FoxNews with Sean Hannity where a
prostitute told him that the most sexually frustrated of her customers were the
ultra-right members of society."

"Yes, I saw that bitch embarrass Sean!" she exclaimed.

"And, have you looked at the men in your fascist community recently?
Let's see. There's the late Jerry Falwell. Boy, Oh, Boy!" the doctor chuckled.
"He went through Fascist Purgatory inside of one day. He's down below with
Adolph and his gang. And, Sean Hannity. His only claim to masculinity is that
he had to work hard one summer as a paperhanger. I believe we have all pointed-
out that it is remarkable that he and Adolph Hitler were both paperhangers. And,
there's the draft dodger Rush Limbaugh. He had several varying reasons for not
having served in your military during the Viet Nam war. Due to his morbid
obesity, his critics are calling him ‘Jabba the Butt,’” he chuckled. “And, Ann,
there's ‘Turd Blossom’ Rove and Dick Cheney."

"Enough! All right, I admit that the Republican men I've known have
been somewhat lackluster in the masculinity and sexuality departments."

"Yes, we know. And, it surely explains some of your frustration, does it

not?"

"Why do you have to keep putting everything on a sexual platform? I

personally think you have failed to connect all the dots in your Christian-Judeo-
Islamic-Republican theory."

"After all, My Dear, I am Sigmund Freud. While there are some modern
38
psychological experts who say my findings in mental health are too sexually
oriented, when the dust clears it is apparent that most conflicts between men and
women are sexual. Moreover, when you deal with fascist pea brains like the
Islamic fundamentalists, or Falwell's fundamentalists, or your fascist Republicans,
you will always find that you are truly dealing with sexual ‘hang-ups’ as you
Americans say."

"Sex, sex, sex. Crap! Why is sex such a big issue between the
conservatives and the liberals? I don't understand."

"Well, after you admit there is a Big Gal upstairs, you next have to admit
that each and everyone of us has problems with our sexuality. God placed man on
Earth to procreate. Sometimes, we get closely involved with people, ideas,
thoughts, or philosophies that interfere with our sex lives. Many of your modern
fascist men need a serious overhauling of their sexuality."

"Oh, crap! I don't have any problems with my sex life," the skinny
lawyer exclaimed, eyes blinking rapidly. "I am married and I have a normal
relationship with my husband."

"Oh, Ann," he said in a paternal voice. "When was the last time you had
a climax?"

Her lips curled, her eyes went into a squint, and her hands clenched into
fists. "What's that got to do with it?" she hissed.

"Moreover, how often to you have sex with your husband? Once a
month?" he smiled.

"Fuck you Freud! Take your goddamn medical degree, roll it up, and
insert in it a proper orifice of your body and grunt!" she shouted.

"Ah, fixation with anal sex!"

"Up yours! Oh . . . Christ!" she said frustrated.

"Nice man. Really, Ann. I've never had a patient speak to me in such a
fashion. Such attacks are certainly indicative of your borderline personality. And,
you're just like John McCain. He has an impulsive, explosive personality fault
like yours. First, Ann, you need to stop bitching, and realize that sex is a lusty
element of your lower nature. The Big Gal gave us lusty sex drives in order to
guarantee the perpetuation of the species. We all have inner sex drives that
constantly cry for sex, sex, and more sex. Then, if a church or political
organization gets involved in the sexual relationships of men and women, many
39
troubles ensue."

So the counseling session with Dr. Freud continued. They discussed her
early family upbringings and early religious training. She continued asking him to
leave her apartment.

Finally, Ann broke down crying, and begged for some rest. "I can't take
this bullshit any more. Next thing you will tell me is that there is some magic
therapy for my condition," she complained.

"Oh, Hell, Ann! Why don't you just let Idi show you his Tool of
Ecstasy?" he commented as he left in a blue aura.

Ann remained seated on the sofa staring at the wall of her apartment with
glazed eyes. Suddenly feeling very antisocial, she jumped up, grabbed a pencil,
and ran out of her apartment to the little public urinal. Once inside, she began
writing another terribly rhymed limerick on the wall.

There once was an old angry

Fascist from Nantucket,
He was decrepit, but had
Not yet kicked the bucket,
On his answering machine
He screamed 'don't be a creep,
At the sound of the beep you
Liberal fuckhead leave a fucking
Message or you can just fucking
Forget about anyone calling you
Liberal pinko ass back!

A.H.O’R.C.

After she initialed it, she stood back and said, "There . . . I feel so much
better," she proudly whispered to herself.

40
CHAPTER 3

Deutschland über alles

ANN HAD JUST AWAKENED, and she was reading a book from her library on the
histories of Purgatory and Fascist Purgatory. The telephone rang. It was Eva.

"Good morning, Ann. I have some good news for you. My Adolph is
appearing at the conference center down in Hell this morning. He’s giving a seminar
for the senior candidates of Fascist Purgatory. And, we have a cancellation due to
one of the candidates being obliterated. So, would you like to take his place?"

"Surely. I would truly like to hear your Adolph speak in person. Did you
know I read all of his speeches when I took a history class on World War Two?"

"No."

"And, Eva, did you know that my Grandfather was an ardent advocate of
your Adolph's philosophy?"

"No. Well, Ann, you never cease to surprise me. Let me give you a word of
caution. You must not, under any circumstance, allow my Adolph to get to you
emotionally during this seminar. Do you understand?"

"I understand. Don't worry, Eva, I'll remain clinically detached during his
talk. After all, I am an experienced trial lawyer. I don't get emotional about anything
I hear in public."

"I’ll send two Cherubim to escort you to Hell at 1045 AM. The lecture
begins at the center at 11 O'clock. Might I suggest you wear a business suit?"

"Ha! I'll dress for court," Ann said laughing.

* * *

Über alles in der Welt

THE TWO GOLDEN WINGED Cherubim carried Ann through a red aura gateway
into Hell, and delivered her to the front of the conference center at precisely 1050
hours. At 1055 Ann entered the auditorium inside the huge building that look just
like Hitler’s Reich Party Headquarters in Nürnberg. Outside the main doors to the
auditorium was a marquee that read:

Morning Lecture
41
 "The Moral and Political Reasons for
the Drittes Reich Invading the Countries
Contiguous to Germany Before and
During the Second World War
- by -
Reich Führer Adolph Hitler."

Ann was dressed in a basic black business suit with an open white silk
blouse. She wore a tasteful pearl necklace, matching earrings, along with patent
leather medium heel shoes. She carried a small leather portfolio with a legal pad and
pens. The attendant at the entrance gave her a nametag with "A-N-N" embossed on it
in large red letters. She took a seat in the front of the auditorium near the large
orchestra. She looked around and saw very few women. She was certain she
recognized youthful versions of North Carolina Senator Jesse Helms, South Carolina
Senator Strom Thurmond, and, General Hideki Tojo of Japan. Saddam Hussein had a
seat down front near her; he continually turned towards her, and motioned for her to
come sit beside him. She turned away from the Iraqi leader who had just suffered a
rather permanent and extensive neck stretching in Baghdad. She saw Benito
Mussolini seated in the Directors' section beside Francisco Franco, the former fascist
dictator of Spain, and Idi Amin. Then, she saw one of her heroes, Senator Joe
McCarthy, one of America’s best-known fascists. He was seated near Jesse Helms.
He acknowledged her with a nod of his head.

My Gawd, she thought, Senator Joe McCarthy has always been one of my
heroes. And, is that President Woodrow Wilson beside Senator McCarthy? She
recalled he was often called America's first real fascist leader.

The lights dimmed and a series of spotlights appeared on the stage. A group
of men wearing German SS uniforms walked onto the center of the lights and
carefully lined up at attention. Adolph Hitler walked onto the stage into a spotlight as
the audience stood and applauded. He was wearing his Reich Führer’s uniform. He
walked to the podium and carefully placed his notes on it. Then, he signaled the
orchestra to begin. The orchestra began playing an introduction to a song she
immediately recognized as the German national anthem. The SS troopers, Hitler and
an audience of about two hundred fascist men and women turned towards the Nazi
flag to sing.

Ann rose and joined the singing. She knew the song by heart — taught to
her by her one of her pro-Nazi Political Science professors at Yale. The crypto-
fascist instructor found her very attractive, especially in light of her continued
deliveries of Earth-shaking blowjobs at his condo on the weekends in exchange for
his giving her straight A's in his undergraduate classes.

Das Lied der Deutschen

42
(Song of Germany)

Deutschland, Deutschland über alles,

Über alles in der Welt,
Wenn es stets zu Schutz und Trutze
Brüderlich zusammenhält,
Von der Maas bis an die Memel,
Von der Etsch bis an den Belt -
Deutschland, Deutschland über alles
Über alles in der Welt.

(Germany, Germany above all,

Above everything in the world,
When always, for protection,
We stand together as brothers.
From the Maas to the Memel
From the Etsch to the Belt -
Germany, Germany above all
Above all in the world.)

II

43
 Deutsche Frauen, deutsche Treue,
Deutscher Wein und deutscher
Sollen in der Welt behalten
Uns zu edler Tat begeistern
Unser ganzes Leben lang.
Deutsche Frauen, deutsche Treue
Deutscher Wein und deutesche Treue.

(German women, German loyalty,

German wine and German song,
Shall retain in the world,
Their old lovely ring
To inspire us to noble deeds
Our whole life long.
German women, German loyalty,
German wine and German song.)

III

Einigkeit und Recht und Freiheit

für das deutsche Vaterland!
Danach lasst uns alle streben
Brüderlich mit Herz und Hand!
Einigkeit und Recht und Freiheit
Sind des Glückes Unterpfand;
Blüh' im Glanze dieses Glückes,
Blühe, deutsche Vaterland.

(Unity and law and freedom

For the German Fatherland
Let us all strive for that
In brotherhood with heart and hand!
Unity and law and freedom
Are the foundation for happiness
Bloom in the glow of happiness
Bloom, German Fatherland.)

At the end of the third stanza, all of the SS troopers had tears streaming
down their faces. Hitler displayed a staunch look as he turned toward the flag making
a full Nazi salute. Ann was just short of entering a state of hysteria as she gasped,
sobbed, and cried as she sung the last stanza of the song her German grandfather
loved so much.

IV

44
 Deutschland, Deutschland über alles,
Und im Unglück nun erst recht.
Nur im Unglück kAnn die Liebe
Zeigen, ob sie stark und echt.
Und so soll es weiterklingen
Von Geschlechte zu Geschlecht:
Deutschland, Deutschland über alles,
Und im Unglück nun erst recht.

(Germany, Germany above all

And in misfortune all the more.
Only in misfortune can love
Show if it's strong and true.
And so it should ring out
From generation to generation:
Germany, Germany above all,
And in misfortune all the more.)

Suffice it to say that certain individuals or groups of people, who are

followers of popular figures, often become very obsessive in their adoration of
powerful men like Adolph Hitler, Benito Mussolini, Idi Amin and modern rock stars.
Adult women can become quite juvenile in their adorations of these figures.
Sometimes their behavior can be called a form of lustful sentiment, if not out-and-out
frenzied fanaticism.

The drives of these "groupies" or "fans" can become very exuberant as

witnessed in their promiscuity, irrational behavior, and complete loss of self-control
at public events such as mass rallies or rock concerts. When in their frenzy states of
mind, these groupies can often break down in sobs and tears, have screaming fits, and
engage in all kinds of hysterical conduct at the mere sight of their object of adoration.

As she sang, Ann's mind had departed from the discipline of an experienced
trial lawyer to that of a little girl who acted like an emotionally disturbed gibbering
idiot at a rock concert. She was now an Adolph Hitler groupie who was crying and
gasping for air from her lustful sentiment and joy.

All of the men in the audience turned to the Nazi Flag on the stage and
saluted it while crying Seig Heil! Seig Heil! over and over. Finally, they turned and
saluted Hitler and continued the same chant. Ann's body was shaking, and she
continually saluted him with the ancient arm salute Hitler stole from the Romans.
She had at last found the father she had always wanted.

“Mein Vater, mein Führer! Seig Heil! Seig Heil! (My Father! My Leader!
Hail Victory! Hail Victory!)” she screamed over and over.

Hitler saluted his followers with a smile of confidence on his face. Then, he
turned to his notes and motioned for the audience to take their seats. Ann continued
45
blubbering and crying.

A fascist man seated beside Ann her pulled her down in her seat whereupon
he consoled her. “There now, Fräulein Ann, you must muster your strength and
listen to the rest of the lecture of our Führer.”

“Oh, you don’t understand. He’s better than Rev. Jerry Falwell, Rev. Pat
Robertson, Rev. Jimmy Swaggart, Rev. Moon — even better than George W. Bush.
He is my vater!’”

“Ah, yes. I agree. The Führer is the best speaker in the universe. I know, I
wrote many of his speeches, including this one.”

“Oh, my Gawd! I recognize you. You’re Dr. Joseph Goebbels! His

propaganda minister.”

“Yes, now let’s sit quietly as the Führer ells us of his struggles in Europe
prior to the World War. What you are getting ready to hear relates closely to the
same kind of struggle your Bush men have been faced with recently. It’s so hard to
maintain a constant fascist front when you are dealing with so many inferior races
attacking you. And, after he speaks, we will close the lecture by singing Die Wacht
am Rhein.”

Adolph did not waste time. He opened his lecture with a powerful
statement.

"Germany liberated its contiguous states prior to World War Two as a direct
result of deficient statesmanship! Honored guests, you are here today to hear my
reasons for the actions of Germany, and you will hear all of them. But, it was
primarily deficient statesmanship that caused World War Two — not my beloved
National Socialist Party!"

Nods and grunts of approval were heard all over the hall.

“Along the way, we killed a few Jews, Gypsies, Russian spies, mentally
deranged, and physically deformed non-Aryans. Also, we imprisoned many of those
pesky Ancient Free Masons as a favor to the Church.

The audience rendered a strong applause at the last remark.

"Honored guests. Many of you are here to determine whether you still
possess the qualities needed to be a true Fascist. Right now, the directors of Fascist
Purgatory are reincarnating candidates in new identities. It is hoped by myself, and
my friends in Hell that many of you will retain your tendencies to be true Fascists. It
is a time when only deeds count. Idle words are of little importance. I do not appear
here to day as Reich Führer, rather I appear as your friendly fascist from Hell. I can
only hope that you will carry some of my thoughts back to Earth with you when you
46
are reincarnated. Now, we have been condemned because of our invasion of the
countries of Europe prior to the Second World War. Additionally, they keep
condemning me because I killed a few Jews, Gypsies, Russian spies, mentally
deranged, and physically deformed non-Aryans. And, why, why are they giving me
Hell about imprisoning a few Ancient Free Masons?” he said shaking his hands in the
air.

And so the speech continued for almost an hour. All during that period
Hitler held the audience firmly in his grasp. His hand and arm gestures, speech
patterns, pauses, shouts, and sneers captivated the audience and Ann. Finally, he
made his summation.

“Now, my friends, let us sing our beloved song, Die Wacht am Rhein, and
adjourn for lunch. This afternoon I will deliver my next lecture on the current state of
America. He motioned for his SS troopers to rise and turn toward the Nazi flag. He
turned toward the flag and began singing as the audience joining him in The Watch
on the Rhine.

Die Wacht am Rhein!

(The Watch on The Rhine)

I
Es braust ein Ruf wie Donnerhall,
wie Schwertgeklirr und Wogenprall:
Zum Rhein, zum Rhein, zum deutschen Rhein,
wer will des Stromes Hüter sein?

(A call roars like a thunderbolt,

like clashing swords and splashing waves:
To the Rhine, the Rhine, to the German Rhine,
who wants to be the stream's guardian? )

(Refrain)

Lieb' Vaterland, magst ruhig sein,

lieb' Vaterland, magst ruhig sein,
fest steht und treu die Wacht,
die Wacht am Rhein!
Fest steht und treu die Wacht,
die Wacht am Rhein!

(Dear fatherland, put your mind at rest,

dear fatherland, put your mind at rest,
solid stands, and staunch,
the Watch, the Watch at the Rhine!
Solid stands, and staunch,
the Watch, the Watch at the Rhine!)
47
 II

Durch Hunderttausend zuckt es schnell,

und aller Augen blitzen hell;
der Deutsche bieder, fromm und stark,
beschützt die heil'ge Landesmark.

(Through hundreds of thousands it twitches fast,

and everybody's eyes brightly flash;
the German, respectable, pious, and strong,
protects the sacred county border.)

III

Er blickt hinauf in Himmelsau'n,

wo Heldenväter niederschau'n,
und schwört mit stolzer Kampfeslust:
Du Rhein bleibst deutsch wie meine Brust! <

(He looks up to the meadows of heaven,

where ancient heroes glance down,
and swears with proud pugnacity:
You Rhine will remain German like my breast!)

IV

Solang ein Tropfen Blut noch glüht,

noch eine Faust den Degen zieht,
und noch ein Arm die Büchse spAnnt,
betritt kein Feind hier deinen Strand!

(As long as a drop of blood still glows,

a fist still draws the dagger,
and one arm still holds the rifle,
no enemy will here enter your shore!)

Ann had been reduced to a puddle of tears and childish emotions. She
collapsed in the arms of Joseph Goebbels.

Hitler looked down at Ann and Goebbels, smiled and continued. "Next, you
cannot image what I faced during this time. Why, even the Norwegians joined in the
conspiracy with Poland, Britain, France, and America. The Norwegians were actually
going to allow the members of the conspiracy to land on their shores, take control of
their ports, and assume command of their iron ore fields.”

"Oh, no!" Ann was heard to whisper.

48
 "As late as September, 1939, I appealed to them, and I begged and begged
them to think of peace, not war. As I stated earlier, it was clearly deficient
statesmanship guiding them. Understand, I always acted on the utmost humanitarian
grounds. I assured the peoples of Britain and France that Germany had no thoughts of
military action. I sent communiqué after communiqué to their leaders. They publicly
accused me of ‘lacking in sanity’ or the like.”

"Oh, Dr. Goebbels, he didn't have ‘Turd Blossom’ and FoxNews on his side.
They could'uv gotten him so much better press — along with your work, of course."
she whispered to the propaganda expert who nodded in the affirmative.

As the audience rose to their feet for a final salute to Hitler before lunch,
Ann jumped up, gave the Nazi salute, and cried "Seig Heil! Seig Heil! Seig Heil!"

Tears swell in Hitler's eyes. He turned, gestured towards Ann and said, "If I
had had SA and SS and tank troops with the balls Miss Ann has between her legs, I
never would have lost the war!

Danke, mein Vater,” Ann shouted.

With a trembling voice, he shouted “Ein Volk, ein Reich, ein Führer, und
Fräulein Ann (A People, an Empire, a Leader, and Miss Ann). With these things, the
Drittes Reich will again rise up against all adversity.”

The audience shot to its feet in wild applause. Ann staggered to her feet and
collapsed back into Goebbel's arms.

“If we can keep sending Aryan leaders like Fräulein Ann back to Earth, we
will eventually regain control of the world!” he said with clinched fists before his
face. “With the world in our hands, the Big Gal will have to reconsider keeping us all
in Hell. We all will be reincarnated back to Earth to rule for eternity in the Viertes
Reich (Fourth Empire)! Seig Heil!"

"Oh, yes. Oh, yes. Now I understand, my Führer," she mumbled as her eyes
started tearing again. With this thought, her mind split and she recalled something in
her past about her WW II veteran father who lost an arm at the Battle of the Bulge,
and his being a Mason. But, these were only fleeting thoughts that were totally
overpowered by the remarks of Hitler. She again collapsed in the arms of Dr.
Goebbels who took her aside. He then escorted her to the dining room where they
would lunch with many famous dead fascists of modern history.

* * *
Afternoon Lecture

“How The Bush Family and the American

Neo-conservatives Have Continued the Fascist
49
 Policies of Germany and Italy around
the World Today. Also, the new Obama threat.”

Ann retook her seat beside Joseph Gobbels. She was curious about some
language on the marquee that mentioned an “Obama threat.”

“Dr. Goebbels. What exactly is the Obama threat?”

“Oh, my goodness. They have kept you under wraps. Let’s see, Ann, you
came to us during May of 2008. At that time, the presidential race in your country
was boiling down to John McCain for our fascists, and Hillary Clinton for the
Democrats. You may recall Barack Obama was competing for the Democrat
nomination against Hillary Clinton.”

“Yes, but he is a small time Illinois state senator who recently just got
elected to the U.S. Senate. He’s not qualified to be president.”

“In June of last year, he defeated Hillary Clinton and became the nominee
for the Democrats.

“My Gawd! Well, John McCain defeated him? Right?” she asked with
panic in her voice.

“Brace yourself, my dear. Barack Obama defeated John McCain with a

sizable margin. He is now the President of the United States,” he replied with an
obvious disgust in his voice.

“You mean a Negro is president of America?”

“Yes. A non-Aryan. A Biblically-ordained minority. He is a new threat to

our plans. We need your help Ann. You must be returned to your former body. You
must be allowed to run for office so you can help us develop fascist America without
the likes of Obama, and all of his followers in the Democrat Party. Now, let’s listen
to our leader,” he said as Hitler walked out on the stage to a resounding applause.

Hitler turned to the Nazi flag and saluted. “Seig Heil! Deutschland über
alles! Now, my friends, let us entertain the second lecture of today’s seminar.
Ladies and Gentlemen, today we are honored with the presence of Fräulein Ann, one
of our most recent arrivals at Fascist Purgatory. Back in America, she was one of our
top fascist writers and television commentators. She, following the dictates of Dick
Cheney, along with the broadcasting support of Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity
and FoxNews have done more for the revival of our movement in America than any
other Americans in recent history.”

“Ann, he really loves you,” Goebbels whispered to her. “He’s read

everything you’ve written.”

50
 “More importantly, she has had the opportunity to see our greatest eight
years of fascist leadership come into fruition in the George W. Bush administration.
And, of course, we have to give lots of credit to FoxNews for their support of Ann
and Sean. The New World Order of the International Bankers on Wall Street, Big Oil
and Gas, and George Bush-41 is in effect through George Bush-43 and Dick Cheney.
Most recently, Fräulein Ann,” he said looking down at her, “I am sure you saw one of
our greatest plans for the destruction of the middle class of America in action, the
enormous financial crash and bail-out in the last of 2008. It was a masterpiece of
fascist planning and execution. The middle and lower classes of America never knew
what hit them. Soon, we will be able to declare martial law in the U.S.A., Canada,
and other parts of the world. Then, our New World Order fascist leaders will
confiscate all personal weapons and take command and control of the world.
Fräulein Ann, do you have anything to say about your recent experiences in New
York City?

"No, my Führer. I'm afraid economics is not one of my strong suits. When I
came to Fascist Purgatory, it was May of 2008. I’ve been out of touch with current
events. Plus, the directors have not allowed me to read any recent newspapers or see
any television programs from Earth. Dr. Goebbels just told me about the financial
crash and bailout over lunch. It looks as if our fascist leaders in New York made
billions of dollars during the crisis."
Hitler looked out over the room with apparent pride on his face. “Yes, it was
a stroke of genius that I created with the Führer of Hell. Ah, yes, it was a
masterpiece of timing. The stupid Democrats and the effete Republican middle class
never saw it coming. We used fear to drive them into our clutches. It was like the
time I told the German people that if they gave up their weapons, they would all be
safer. Damn fools believed me. Then, of course, I had my SS and SA troopers go
out and kill a lot of unarmed people like Jews, Poles, Masons, Gypsies, etc. They
never learn!"

Ann sat back down with a twisted smile on her face, biting her lip, with her
splitting mind asking many questions.

“Now, my friends. Let us discuss the moral reasons for our actions during
World War Two, and currently in the United States and Europe. As you know, the
German Realm of the National Socialist revolution was always a fair and decent
trading partner and neighbor with our bordering states. Germany prided itself on its
quality products and even accepted the worthless money of Great Britain and the
United States in exchange. There was no reason for Britain and America to turn on
such sound and healthy trading partners as us.”

Hitler continued his speech about the interests of the Reich and how he had
remained calm but decisive with his opponents. He found it strange that other
countries allied with the British and Americans when given a chance to deal with
Germany. Each time European countries wanted to discuss fair trade and maintaining
border control, Hitler would enter into ethnographical and historical reasons for their
becoming part of his realm.
51
 “They knew, my friends, that I was under a duty to bring all Germanic
peoples under the German flag. Why, I have never understood why they would not
want to become part of the Reich.”

He continued speaking of how Europeans and Americans should have paid

supreme sacrifices for the Aryan race. How they should have sanctified themselves in
the belief of an Aryan god and become heroic to the point of sacrificing themselves
for the Reich.

“Remember, my friends, how Benito Mussolini gave us his treatise on

Fascism?” he said pointing to Mussolini in the Director’s Box. “You, Benito, you
gave us the sacred and heroic elements of the true fascist. How could you forget your
own words? Why did you leave us and become a member of the staff at Fascist
Purgatory? There is still time, Benito. You can return to us. We want you back!” he
said with open, pleading arms.

The audience applauded Hitler’s remark about wanting Mussolini back in

their ranks. The former Italian dictator sat calmly beside Francisco Franco of Spain.
Both men gave Hitler a rather cold look.

“We Germans will hold our heads high with pride as we pay tribute to all of
the men who died for our cause during the war. They gave their lives for the State,
the Reich. Let me remind you all that the Allies had robbed Germany after the First
World War. They were caught up in a dogma of financially enslaving our Aryan
people ― and politically enslaving them as well. That same hatred of Germany and
its Aryan people was continued when those same countries again tried to rob us just
before and during World War Two!” he shouted as the audience jumped to its feet
with wild applause and shouts of Seig Heil!

“Oh, Dr. Goebbels, I never saw it that way,” she whispered to the
propagandist.

“And, my friends,” Hitler continued, “it was the English, French, and the
Americans who wanted war with me and Germany. They did not want Germany
standing as a bulwark against those pesky international Jewish bankers and those
pesky Ancient Free Masons. So, I killed a few Jews, Masons, Gypsies, Russians and
others who stood in the way of the Reich,” he said to an immediate strong applause.
“Even the Poles, a Germanic people, joined them. Rather than submit Germany to an
unjust and illegal advance of these wayward nations, I took the only action I could —
I defended Germany with all of my heart and soul.”

Hitler continued his speech about how he fought the Allies during the War,
always seeking fair and just actions. He attacked the leaders of the various nations
opposing him, accusing them of being warmongers and drunks. He called the
Americans victims of lies and delusions given to them by the British. He cited the
spiritual powers of the German people and its soldiers for standing between Germany
52
and the deluded Allies. He stated that the men who died in World War One and
World War Two did not die in vain, rather they died for the Drittes Reich in
preparation for the coming new Reich based in America.

“Let no one misunderstand, we Germans are carrying out the will of our
Aryan ancestors. We will purify the world of weak races, weak minds and bodies,
and those who exhibit weak holiness and heroism. The Aryan man and woman will
once again risk their lives to win victory for our cause. We will give the world the
human comradeship it needs under our Aryan flags.”

“Now, my girl, listen to his final words,” Goebbels whispered to Ann.

“Behind us is a long, cold winter — two wars in which we laid the

foundations for our final victory. What remained to be done after these wars has been
accomplished by The New World Order of the Bush family and the Republican Party
of the United States of America. And, it will also be through women like Fräulein
Ann that we will complete our goals. Our armies will be the strongest in history. No
one, no leader, no country can change our plans or stop our drive for a return to world
domination. My friends, I tell you all — there is an everlasting providence that has
been cast on us by the Führer of Hell. No power or support coming from the other
side of the time continuums will be able to change the outcome of the coming battle.
The everlasting providence given to us by Him will give us victory. All of the
denunciations about our Drittes Reich (Third Empire), our pleas for disarmament, our
pleas for peace, and our pleas for purifying the bloodlines of the world will not be met
with derision this time. The Führer of Hell has given us His full support. He has
promised me that all international finance will come under our New World Order.
There will only be two classes: the Aryan leaders of the new Reich, and the
subordinate workers who will serve them. We will spiritually follow our Führer of
Hell, and we will be heroic for His cause. All in all, we will give the world the New
World Order that George Bush 41 and George Bush 43 dream of along with men like
Dick Cheney and John McCain. We will strike the chains from our Aryan brothers
and sisters. We will find a way to return to Earth and create our new and better order.
Obama and his ilk will not stand in our way!” he said to another wild applause.

Ann turned to Goebbels and whispered, “Jeez, I’d like to meet the Führer of
Hell.”

“Ann, after the speech, the Führer wants to see you in his office,” Goebbels
said to her quietly. “I’ll personally escort you there.”

“So, my friends,” Hitler continued. “ It is time for us to go. Let’s turn

towards our beloved flag and sing the last two stanzas of ‘The Watch on the Rhein.’”

So, Hitler closed the lectures for the day. Dr. Goebbels approached Ann
during the cocktail party held following the event.

“Come, Ann. The Führer is waiting for you in his office. We are to go there
53
at once.”

Ann was excited that Hitler wanted to see her. After all of the nice things he said
during the lecture, she was eager to place herself in his service for the approaching
Viertes Reich.

“Do you really think he likes me, Dr. Goebbels?”

“Yes, my Dear,” he said as they walked down the corridor to the office. “He
speaks very highly of you and your many skills. He is very anxious to discuss the
many cares and concerns you mutually share.”

“Oh, I hope I please him.”

“Ah, we’re at his office. I recently had it decorated to accommodate the

times. I hope you enjoy it. I will come and retrieve you later this afternoon,” he said
as he knocked on the door and steered Ann inside. He turned and left.

* * *

A Great Service

“ANN, MY LIEBCHEN, do come in,” the Reich Führer said as he approached her
and kissed her on her cheek. “Please have a seat here on the sofa beside me. We
have so much to discuss. I want to take a personal interest in your future here and
back on Earth.”

“Thank you, my Führer.”

“Oh, Ann. Call me Adolph. After all, here in this time continuum, we are
both thirty years old. We are contemporaries — we should be comrades — the best
of friends. Now, what do you think about the new office Dr. Goebbels designed for
me.

“It looks strangely familiar,” she said as she noticed pictures of Joe
McCarthy, Richard Nixon, Woodrow Wilson, and Monica Wolenski on his wall. “It
looks more like the Oval Office of the White House.”

“Bingo, as you Americans say. You know the old saying, ‘when in Rome,
do as the Romans do.’ Well, Dr. Goebbels felt that since we are making our current
drive for the Viertes Reich in America, our American fascists would feel more
comfortable in an office they recognized.

“Is that Monica Wolenski in that picture? I didn’t know she was a fascist.”

“She’s not, but she performed a great service to Bill Clinton when he was in
his Oval Office. He’s not a fascist either, but he really knew how to function in his
54
Oval Office with Monica and others. In fact, I have a copy of Monica’s little blue
dress in the closet. Why don’t you go put it on, come back, and let me see you in it?

“But . . .but ―”

“No buts, my Dear. I want to see you in that little blue dress. I need you to
perform a service for the Viertes Reich and me. Now, go and return,” he said with
some force.

Ann changed into the blue dress. With her mind splitting in several
directions, she returned to the office where Hitler asked her to turn around and show it
to him.

“Ah, you are so beautiful. A picture of Aryan pulchritude.”

Ann could not help but feel a sudden rush of warmth under her little
American flag pinned just over her womanhood under her whitey-tighties.

“Oh, my liebchen, you have made me so happy. Now, if you will just assist
me in the same manner Monica assisted Bill Clinton with his loneliness in the Oval
Office. I am so lonely, Ann, and I need companionship. I need love. I need you to
be my Monica. I’ll be your Bill Clinton,” he said as he leaned back against his desk,
loosening his belt, and allowing his trousers to drop to the floor

55
CHAPTER 4

Little Blue Dress

SO, ANN BECAME a frequent visitor to Hell. She told Eva and the directors of
Fascist Purgatory that she was just beginning to see the truth about Fascism, and
she needed more time to attend the many seminars on the subject offered to the
condemnare in the darker realm.

As Benito, Scota, Idi, and Dr. Freud counseled her, she began agreeing
with everything they suggested. She related how her exposure to Hell gave her a
new perspective about life in general. “After all,” she related to them, “one needs
comparisons with which to make an accurate decision about complex political and
moral views like Fascism.”

* * *

Joe

One day in March 2009 she returned to Hell to attend a seminar conducted by
Benito Mussolini. He lectured how he, as a reformed fascist, was now fully
rehabilitated and on the staff of Fascist Purgatory helping others. She sat through
the lectures of the former dictator, and then quietly left the conference hall. Joe
McCarthy had asked her to have lunch with him.

At lunch, he began looking across the table with a Mitt Romney opened-
eyed charismatic look. “Oh, Ann. You and I have so much in common. We are
both Aryans, we both are fascists, and we both are Americans,” he said as he
changed to his Jerry Falwell beatific look. “And, you are one of the only people
here who truly understands me,” he said as he gently took her hand over the table.

“Joe, you were one of the people I worshiped when I was studying
political science at Yale. I listened to every one of your speeches and saw all of
the films of your public hearings. Did I ever tell you I visited your grave?”

“You’re kidding me. You visited my gravesite?” he said with tears

growing in his eyes.

“Yes, and I had a photograph taken of me standing beside your

headstone. I placed it on my website and caught Holy Hell from the commie
pinko liberal press.”

“So memory of my anti-communist stands lingers in the minds of the

pinkos? They still fear me,” he said a rather twisted look that would make a
sadomasochism instructor proud.

56
 “There are still many Americans who feel you were given a bum rap,”
she said gently squeezing his hand. “You should have been our president.”

“Ann, my dear. Let’s go over to my apartment where I can show you

some of my latest writings. I want your opinion about some of the internal
government investigations I want to start when I am reincarnated to Earth. If you
go back first, you can help get the ball rolling for the investigations.”

They went to his apartment near the conference center. As they entered the unit,
Ann could not help but notice pictures of Richard Nixon, Dick Cheney, George
W. Bush, Woodrow Wilson, and Monica Wolensky on the wall.

“You have a picture of Wolensky on the wall too?” she asked.

“Yes, my dear. You see, she performed a great service for Bill Clinton
when he was in the White House. He is, of course, not a fascist, but he had the
right idea about keeping up his health and mental stability. Oh, Ann, I have a
copy of her little blue dress in my bedroom. Could you possibly put it on and
model it for me?”

At first, Ann’s mind began splitting again. Her eyes glazed over. Then,
she looked at the young and pleading Joe McCarthy and said, “Oh, what the hell.”

* * *

Joseph

Later that week, she had a meeting with Dr. Joseph Goebbels in his office. They
were to discuss his proposed propaganda campaign for her should she return to
Earth in her old body. She noticed he also had pictures of Richard Nixon, Dick
Cheney, George W. Bush, and Monica Wolensky on his wall.

“First, Ann, I am very confident that if you and Sarah Palin run together,
you will have an excellent chance of defeating Obama and Biden in 2012. It’s just
a matter of my discrediting them and elevating the two of you to the level of
Valkrie saviors of America.”

“Oh, Dr. Goebbels. Now I see how Adolph obtained such great publicity
under your care.”

“Yes. And, you’ll want the assistance of ‘Turd Blossom.’ He is an adept

fascist propagandist and marvelous at designing creative artificiality for political
candidates. You both must approach the common man and woman, like Joe the
Plumber. I am designing a campaign of creative artificiality for you both. Like
Palin, you need to start using totally nonsensical and stupid remarks that will
appeal to the voters of your party. Remember, you have to maintain the

57
Republican Party’s red neck, fanatical Christian, beer drinking, tobacco spitting
image.”

“I agree, Doctor. I’ve been working on my ‘You Becha!” and ‘Hockey

Moms don’t agree with you’ and “I love Joe the Plumber, and “I love Tito the
Restaurateur” artificial gambits. And, how about this one: ‘Obama’s wife can’t
cook grits!’ and “Biden’s wife can’t coach girl’s hockey?’”

“Excellent. Now, Ann, stop calling me Doctor. Call me Joseph. After

all, we are the same age in this time continuum. We should be close friends,
confidants. We share a common cause.”

“Oh, I respect your opinions so much. I am so glad we are good friends,”

she said.

“Ann, I am also a lonely man. I need the companionship of a good

Aryan woman like you. In fact, it would please me a great deal if you would go
into the next room where you will find a little blue dress like Monica Wolensky
wore in the White House when she was seeing Bill Clinton. Put it on and model it
for me and make me happy.”

By this time she knew the routine. It must be said that Ann no longer
had any reservations about her modeling of Monica Wolensky’s little blue dress.
She was becoming cocksure and confident that she was helping the fascist cause
of the Viertes Reich. Ann had become a skilled expert in providing Earth-shaking
fellatio to three of the most famous men in 20th Century fascist history. She felt
like a high priestess who frequently dropped down to her knees and sacrificed
herself beneath her priests on a high alter of Aryan mysticism.

* * *

A New Perspective

Ann was back in Fascist Purgatory. She was scheduled to attend a lecture by
Princess Scota on the injurious effects of western religion on the women of the
modern world. Ann sat through the lecture, but her mind worked overtime
splitting into constant memories of her experiences in Hell. After the lecture,
Princess Scota approached her and asked that they have lunch at the nearby
cafeteria.

At lunch, Scota expressed her concern for Ann. “Ann, most of us are
worried about you. You are making an inordinate number of visits into Hell. I
talked with Idi about you yesterday, and he said he was worried that you might be
succumbing to the power of Adolph Hitler and his friends.”

“Oh, Scota, it’s nothing like that,” Ann lied through her teeth. “For the
first time, I have become familiar with the famous men who did so much wrong in
58
the last two centuries. Visiting Hell has given me a new perspective. Please don’t
worry about me. In fact, I believe that I can offer some suggestions as to new and
proper therapies of the new fascists arriving here daily. As a result of my visits to
Hell, I have become aware of the many compulsions and attractions fascists might
have to men like Hitler, Stalin, and Mussolini during their periods of rule.”

“I hope so. Ann, do not try to deceive the directors. We’ve heard it all
before. We will see through any machinations installed in you by Hitler and
Goebbels. And, you should be very careful with Joe McCarthy, he’s a fruit loop.”

“Please don’t worry about me.”

“Fine. Now, how are you coming along with your racial views? We
have noticed that you have avoided Idi Amin each time he approached you for
therapy. Are you still feeling racial hatred, Ann?”

“Oh, Idi shouldn’t worry. It’s just that I have so little time these days. I
was hoping you might make me a therapist prior to my going back to Earth. I’ll
talk to Idi about it, and give him some assurances as to my acceptance of him and
all people of color.”

“Don’t forget your own history, Ann. All of us originally ascended out
of Africa,” Scota cautioned as she disappeared in a golden aura.

* * *

The Supreme Sacrifice

Ann was back in Hell. She was having a conference with Hitler and Goebbels.

“Ann, my liebchen, I am worried,” Adolph said. “One of my spies back

in Fascist Purgatory has informed me that the directors are concerned about your
Aryan feelings towards Idi Amin. This could cause us problems in getting you
back into New York City where you are truly needed.”

“Yes, Ann, we must do something decisive to assure them that you are a
reformed fascist.”

“What do you suggest?” she asked.

“Ann, I want you to pay the supreme sacrifice an Aryan woman can pay.
I want you to allow Idi Amin to show you his Tool of Ecstasy,” Hitler said firmly.

“Eh! You want me to sleep with Dada Idi Amin?”

59
 “Yes, Ann. You must show the directors that you no longer hold any
racial prejudices against people of color. I know it will be hard, especially after
your experiences with real Aryan men like us, but we feel it is absolutely
necessary.”

* * *

Deeply-rooted

Ann knew that birds do it, bees do it, and even trees do it. She knew that she was
supposed to have meaningful sexual experiences, but she had yet to have one. To
her, sex had become an act of friendship. Sex had become just a cordial encounter
with the Aryan men in her life. Her true problem was that when she had sex with
any man, she never even came close to a climax. While her desire for sex with
attractive men was considerable, she always knew before she started that she
would not be satisfied in the end – so to speak. And, as she engaged in her noble
contributions to the men of Hell, she continued to have problems with her lack of
climatic satisfaction. She had read about women who were reported to be
nymphomaniacs, i.e., women who engaged in hyper sexuality, having multiple
climaxes, and never quite getting enough. The idea was somewhat depressing to
Ann who still yearned for her first climax.

One day, while discussing sex with another fascist woman, a former
psychologist, in the lounge of the local Italian restaurant, Ann was given a clue
about how women obtain satisfaction with their men. Rather than be an uber-slut,
all she had to do was become completely attached to her partner. She realized that
was a problem as she had never, ever been completely attached to any man. So,
upon her returning to Earth, she planned to find a man to whom she could be both
spiritually and physically attached for the rest of her life. Probably someone like
Joe McCarthy.

Certainly not my husband, what’s his name.

In the meanwhile, Ann had to carry out her mission with Idi Ami as
instructed by Adolph Hitler and Dr. Joseph Goebbels — something she felt she
might as well get behind her. She called Idi and left a message on his machine.
“Idi, my dear, call me as your earliest convenience. I have something very
personal to discuss with you in regards to my therapy.”

Next, Ann arranged for a catered dinner at her apartment. She changed
into a fresh Wolensky blue dress and waited for Idi’s call. Soon, the phone rang.

“Ann, you want to talk with me?” the deep voice asked.

“Oh, Idi, I’m so happy you returned my call. Listen, I feel we have never
had a chance to discuss my case in private – in a truly relaxed atmosphere. And I
know you think I’ve been avoiding you. If at all possible, could you come over
60
for dinner at my apartment this evening? I’ll arrange for a nice Italian dinner for
the two of us,” she said in an alluring voice, “and we’ll have a nice talk about my
case.”

“Yes, that will be fine. I have to first attend a staff meeting this
afternoon. I’ll see you about eight o’clock.”

When Idi arrived that evening, Ann escorted him into a candle lighted
apartment. Softly pulsing Barry White music was heard in the background. The
aroma of Italian food, Idi’s favorite, lofted throughout the apartment. They had
dinner and wine, then went to the sofa to relax.

“Well, Ann, I must say, that was a delightful dinner. The food and wine
were excellent. Now, you know we all have been concerned about your frequent
visits to Hell. Princess Scota told me that you seem to have no concern about
your visits, and that you would like to be considered for therapist status here in
Fascist Purgatory.”

“Yes. But first, Idi, let’s discuss my personal therapy. As you know,
you have done a lot for many women coming here as to their racial prejudices and
their ideations about Fascism.”

“I try, but sometimes it is difficult. So many fascists, so little time.”

“Sometimes, Idi, men like you do not understand how women work.
You fail to understand what separates men from women as to being attracted to
each other. Men are usually attracted to women, and then want to have sex with
them at the first opportunity,” she said as she slid across the sofa placing her arm
over Idi’s shoulders and looking him straight in the eyes.

“I thought we were going to discuss your trips to Hell,” he said

somewhat taken aback at her action.

“Let’s talk about Hell later. Did you know, Idi, most women are as hard-
wired as men when it comes to sex. It’s just that men are wired for physical sex at
the first sign of an opportunity or visual stimulus.”

“And, women? Ha! I have never been able to figure-out women in that
regards. Men just don’t understand what makes women want to have sex with
men.”

“What women are attracted to, Idi, is men’s power. They are always
looking for signs of male power. You see, women have this deeply rooted instinct
that tells them whether a man will be a powerful lover or not. The Big Gal hard-
wired us to seek such men in order to perpetuate the species.”

61
 “Why are you telling me this, Ann? You have rejected me ever since
you came here,” he said with hurt in his voice.

Her fingers began stroking the inside of his thigh where his enormous
manhood was clearly showing. Idi was suddenly transfixed by the sudden gesture.
Ann began undressing Idi on the sofa. After his huge manhood sprang loose, Ann
took him and led him back to her bedroom where she had candles and incense
burning. She placed the powerful man on his back in her bed. Looking down at
him, she realized that he was truly huge. She had never, ever seen a penis that
large.

Most people’s bodies vary to a large degree when it comes to sexual

attraction and arousal with the opposite sex. Pheromones, sexual hormones, have
a lot to do with it. Ann and Idi were both in a rather fecund condition as their
pheromones go. Ann was emitting strong female pheromones, and Idi was
flooding her bedroom with his powerful male pheromones. As the powerful
chemicals entered their noses and went into the sexual arousal centers of their
brains, they suddenly became almost savage in their embraces.

After a lot of grunting, groaning, gasping, sighing, and general exhibition

of sexual arousal combined with a short period of foreplay, Ann climbed up on Idi
and began the insertion of his huge Tool of Ecstasy in her womanhood. It was at
this time Ann realized what one of her problems had been with Neocon
Republican men in her life. She apparently had a large and very deep vagina, and
the Neocon men did not have enough equipment to even halfway fill it. Although
somewhat difficult, Ann finally managed to insert Idi’s huge cock all the way to
the bottom of her vagina. For the first time in her life, she was full of cock.
Then, she began her ride towards her sexual climatic fulfillment.

After a lot of screaming about his splitting her open with his tool, and
screaming for more and more as she began having her first series of shaking,
quaking, shivering, and quivering climaxes in her life, Ann found herself
insatiable. She wanted more and more and more. She couldn’t get enough of Idi
and his Tool of Ecstasy.

Eventually, Idi became sated and could do no more. Ann would have
continued the love fest, but he told he needed a break. The truth was that Idi was
pussy-whipped for the first time in his life.

Suffice it to say that a woman might be uncomfortable by suddenly

experiencing new and potent feelings as evidenced by multiple climaxes. She
sometimes might wrongfully feel that the man forced her to feel strange new and
powerful emotions. She might even feel she had been violated and raped
psychically.

Many women who consent to having sex with a man they regard as a
powerful love maker suddenly find themselves going through a series of new and
62
almost automatic actions. They begin having increasing levels of desires and
cravings and releases during their sexual bouts with their lovers. Sometimes,
these women are jarred to their psychic cores by the hottest, most Earth-shaking
climaxes they have ever experienced. At first they become frightened of them,
but once they become unleashed, they often become vessels that pour-out
cascades of climatic and all-consuming sexual hunger that must be satisfied. They
often become addicted to the man who brings about these new and compelling
acts.

What had been a small burning candle in Ann’s vagina was now a lust-
triggered blowtorch of intense sexual flame. In her new and powerful sexual
status, she became just like her male. There was no difference. Thus, as a result
of her new experience with Idi, Ann abandoned her plans to move on to Voltaire
and Mussolini with her seductions. She realized that she and Idi were now both
one sexually, i.e., her blonde Tool of Ecstasy had become just like Idi’s black
Tool of Ecstasy.

Her mind was no longer splitting. She was thinking clearly for the first
time in her existence. She now had a Za-Zen perception of the Yin and Yang of
the Tao, and where she was in the Big Gal’s universe. She also had a new and
burning sex drive, and she had Idi — and she was not about to give up either.

63
CHAPTER 5

The Teacher

ANN HAD BECOME the perfect student of the teachers in Fascist Purgatory.
She attended their seminars with a new vigor, and participated in every project
they developed for the new arrivals. She was directly instrumental in designing
many new seminars for the staff:

--How Americans Have Been Deceived: The

Republicans Are the True Fascists.

--Dick Cheney’s Fascist Justification for Torture

at Guantánamo.

--Republican Fascist Camouflage: How th

Most Fascist Shift in American Socio-Political
Philosophy Has Gone Unnoticed Due to the
Assistance of the Fascist Printed Media, Radio
Talk-Show, and Cable TV News Broadcasting.

--By Using Overseas Threats of Terrorism,

American Fascists Justified Increases in
Surveillance of American Citizens

--How George W. Bush and Dick Cheney

Created a System Which Celebrates the
Shedding of Blood in the Name of a Maniacal
State. (How Cheney and Bush Believe
They Work for God, and God is Marching
on Earth)

--How the Fascist Destroys Democracy by

Weakening Trust Using Secrecy, Mendacity,
and Intimidation.

--As Hitler and Goebbels Used a Pseudo

Religious Transfiguration of Politics, So Have
Bush, Cheney, and their Ultra-Right Fascist
Christian Followers Done the Same.

--Appealing to the New Authoritarianism and

Radical Religious Orientation of Deep South
Voters, Republican Party Fascists Have Created
a Sense of Greater Communal Belongingness
Similar to Hitler’s Germany in the 1930s.
64
 --The Proto-Fascist Mood in the American
Christian Right.

--How Bush and Cheney Adopted Adolph

Hitler’s Belief That He Was an Instrument
of Providence.

* * *

A Modern Fascist State

FINALLY, THE STAFF decided that Ann could begin lecturing. On the day of
her first teaching assignment, she chose a new three-hour seminar she had
developed entitled “How to Create a Modern Fascist State: A Study of the Bush-
Cheney Doctrine in America.” She wore her best business suit, and she adopted
her best trial lawyer demeanor as she addressed a class of over two hundred newly
arrived fascists.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, before a detailed analysis of today’s subject

matter, let me go over the major categories of the seminar to set the stage for your
understanding of what we are doing here today. Let’s look at the general themes
presented in today’s class.

“To quickly create a modern fascist state, you need to generate an

immediate need for Fascism. To do that, you create fears of both internal and
external enemies. In the USA we had the false-flag 9-11 attack do this for us.
The Saudi Arabians gave us the Islamo-fascist terrorist.

“You will also need secret prisons where you can keep your prisoners
without undue discovery and interference. We Americans recently had such
prisons all over the world. I am sure you recall your own country’s use of such
facilities.

“You will also need a special caste system for enforcement. Adolph
Hitler has his SA and SS troops, and we in America have our new Homeland
Security forces that worked with Vice President Cheney and his secret military
special operations and assassination groups.

“You have to have an internal spy system. In the USA, we have the
absolute best electronic spying system in the world. We know when every
American sneezes and how many times.

“You can’t allow your opposition to gain any public ground. You have to
attack your opposition, e.g., Democrats, and moderates by claiming that they are
65
the true fascists. For example, using reverse psychology, radio talk show
personalities Rush Limbaugh and Mike Savage are always accusing the
Democrats of being fascists. It works on weak minds.

“You have to do away with the rule of law such as the Writ of Habeas
Corpus. Remember what Dick Cheney recently said: he claimed that the
suspension of habeas corpus and water boarding prisoners was absolutely legal
under the American Constitution and Bill of Rights. We will get into a lengthy
discussion about how he and his cohorts continue to deceive the weak-minded
Neocons of the USA with this kind of propaganda.

“Also, you must publicly destroy any public officials or citizens who
criticize you. This is done through the use of your propaganda machine and tax
collectors. Dr. Joe Goebbels will come in and speak to us for ten minutes on this
subject. Examples offered will be Rush Limbaugh and FoxNews. As to taxes, he
has been working with the I.R.S. and Federal Reserve for decades.

“You must control the press. Using effective propaganda tools like
FoxNews, you can halt the dissemination of any information that is sensitive to
the fascist cause. You simply claim you are protecting the national interest.

“All political critics are to be called traitors. For example, when Max
Cleland, a tri-amputee veteran of the Viet Nam War serving as Director of the
Veterans Administration, opposed Senator Saxby Chambliss by voicing Democrat
Party philosophy, the senator called him a traitor. The best examples of this kind
of action are still found in the State of Georgia where weak minds are easily
molded by draft-dodgers and Chicken Hawks like Chambliss.

“Next, using real or imaginary threats, you suspend the rule of law. That
is to say, you find cogent reasons for the suspension of the writ of habeas corpus,
the right to an attorney, protection against illegal search and seizure, etc.

“In all of these actions, the fascist propaganda expert simply keeps crying
about multiple dangers, fears, threats, etc. etc.”

And so the lecture went.

* * *

Hell Forbid!

Over in Hell, Adolph Hitler and Dr. Joseph Goebbels were having a meeting with
Lord Satan, the Führer of the Dark Realm.

66
 “So, you both can see why I am so encouraged about sending Ann back
to New York City. She has all of the encoutrements we need for a presidential
candidate in 2012,” Adolph said to the other two.

“Exactly, Führer,” Dr. Goebbels agreed. “She has it all.”

Satan nodded His head in approval. “Well, it looks like you two have
been working overtime. Ann is just what we need to team up with Sarah Palin in
2012. She is the answer to our current losses at the hands of those fools, Bush and
Cheney.”

“Yes, Lord Satan. But we have to get her by the Directors of Fascist
Purgatory and the Big Gal. She must become perfectly convincing in her
rehabilitation as a fascist. She must convince them that if she goes back to New
York City, she will lead the way to an enlightened and new fascist free society.”

“Hell forbid!” Satan exclaimed. “I’ll leave this in your capable hands.
You have done well before. After all it was you two who gave us Joe McCarthy,
Richard Nixon, George Bush-41, and the Republican leadership since 1945. But
for those buffoons Cheney and ‘Dubya’ Bush, we would not be in such a need for
her going back.”

“Her seminars are exactly what we need when she returns to New York
City. We’ll just flip them. She needs to use them as a platform in her race for the
White House,” Goebbels observed. “I have been working with her on her ability
to lie convincingly to the directors. And, our strategy of her sleeping with Idi
Amin is working perfectly.”

“I wonder if the stupid Americans will elect a lawyer who has a history
as a fascist writer and broadcaster,” Goebbels said.

“Of course they will. Hell, they elected an actor in Ronald Reagen, and
an inexperienced black man in Obama,” Adolph replied. “Not to mention electing
‘Dubya’ Bush, a totally unqualified buffoon.”

“You right as usual,” Goebbels agreed.

“Understand,” Satan said somewhat bitterly, “without racial hatred, greed

for money, theft, fraud and deceit, Hell will no longer give me the resonance I
need to make it hum along side the Big Gal’s good and decency. I saw her
yesterday, and she gave me some sardonic remarks about how the Republicans of
the United States were down to their last negative remark.”

“That must have hurt, Lord Satan,” Adolph said. “We know how hard
you have worked to maintain the typical Republican fraud and deceit in the ultra-
right wings of American politics.”

67
 “Let see how well Ann plays the game,” Satan said as he disappeared in
a bright red aura.

* * *

One crazy cookie

It was April 2009, the directors of Fascist Purgatory were having their weekly
staff meeting to discuss current policies, and future plans. Everybody wanted to
discuss Ann and her recent seminar and plans for other teaching tools.

Scota took the initiative. “I would like to give Ann the benefit of the
doubt, but I must tell you that I have reservations about her sincerity. She is an
extremely manipulative personality. She could sell ice boxes to Eskimos in the
middle of a snow storm.”

“Well, I do not agree,” Idi answered. “As you all know, I have become
very close to Ann recently. She has shown me that she has completely erased all
racial prejudice in her soul. She talks to me all the time about new ways of
teaching our fascists how to repent and become rehabilitated. Just last night, she
told me of how she had been deceived by her grandfather’s Nazi leanings, and
how her professors at Yale had misled her about American Fascism. She is
engaging in extensive research for her new seminars. Frankly, I am very proud of
her. I am very pleased as to how I have helped her see the light.”

Voltaire had a dark look on his face. “Huh. You know, I’ve been
thinking. I have this feeling that Ann is simply writing a manual of guidelines to
make America an even more fascist state if she gets back to New York City. All
of the seminars she is creating here can simply be flipped over and made into
fascist doctrines.”

“I agree,” Eva said. “This was one of Dr. Goebbel’s favorite techniques.
And, Joe McCarthy has been one of Ann’s most ardent advisors and supporters on
the other side. He was one of America’s most devious personalities.”

Benito Mussolini shook his head in the affirmative. He looked around at

the staff and said, “Eva is right. Ann is one of the most devious, underhanded
women I have ever met. I simply cannot believe anything she says. Besides, I
watched her carefully during Adolph’s speeches. She was clearly taken-in by
him. You all have seen this kind of conduct with prior candidates. Adolph’s
speeches have always been good tests and indicators of the sincerity of candidates
for reincarnation. They go to Hell, come under the influence of Hitler and
Goebbels, then they begin fabricating complex ways to get back to Earth.”

68
 “I agree with Benito,” Dr. Freud added. “She is one crazy cookie. But
she is also terribly smart. Let me give you some of my observations about Ann.
She has an eating disorder, but I believe we have helped her with that condition.
She also has an antisocial personality component. She surely has a histrionic
overlay — then, again, she is a lawyer. But the real danger I see in her mental
health is the fact that she is also a borderline personality combined with several
narcissistic overlays as seen in her demand for her new boobs and ass.”

“That is true. But, are we not here to help the mentally ill? There is one
thing in her favor we all must consider,” Scota added. “She has definitely come
around on the race issue. Idi, is her love for you genuine? Has she really erased
all of her former racial prejudices?”

“I assure you that she and I are as close as a man and woman can get.
We have become soul mates. We act as one. She has truly become a warm,
loving woman.”

“From what I understand, Idi, she has pussy-whipped you into

submission,” Dr. Freud exclaimed.

“Well . . .she is frisky!” Idi replied.

“Frisky? She is insatiable!” Voltaire interjected. “She is the only

woman who has ever annihilated Idi and his Tool of Ecstasy. Idi, she has you
down to four hours of sleep a night. Why don’t you admit that you have met your
match?”

“I believe if she is reincarnated she will find a man like me and live out a
normal life. In fact, I would like to avoid that by being reincarnated with her,” Idi
replied softly.

“Sheesh! She has Idi by the short hairs. Like I said, that woman is
dangerous,” Benito said. “I simply have no idea what would happen if we did
return her to her body back on Earth. How much of our training would stay with
her?”

“You must give her the benefit of the doubt until she gives you reason to
do otherwise,” Idi said firmly.

“And, how about her limericks?” Eva asked.

“Don’t go there!” Idi growled.

69
CHAPTER 6

The Devil You Say!

ANN HAD JUST COME out of the little public urinal beside the stream near her
apartment. She had penciled another terribly written and rhymed limerick on the
wall. After signing her initials, she stood back and looked at her antisocial
defacing of public property.

A Democrat monkey swinging by his tail,

Told his children both female and male,
"Rest assured, your offspring,
In a couple of years,
May evolve into a professor at Yale."

A.H.O’R.C

“Oh, there. My limericks always make me feel so much better. So

human.” she said aloud.

She looked around and saw one of the little benches beside the stream.
She picked a couple of wild flowers along the stream’s banks and sat down on the
bench. Her thoughts were turning around her seminars. She definitely wanted the
director and staff to accept her efforts. Her thoughts also turned to New York
City, and Idi. How she could return to New York with Idi? She smelled her little
bouquet of flowers and thought of many possibilities. As she looked across the
green meadows in front of her, a bright red aura appeared just down the path. A
rider shot out of the red aura on a dirt bike with a thundering exhaust. He wore
black leathers, and had a helmet with red flames on the sides. The bike was
painted black and had long red and yellow flames licking from front to rear along
the sides. He slammed on his brakes, spun his rear wheel around, and stopped the
bike in a cloud of red dust. He took off his helmet and gloves and dismounted the
motorcycle.

Suddenly, Ann gasped. She experienced a wave of coquettish, flirtatious,

and somewhat lustful desire in the inner core of her mind and body. She had a
rush of intimate, sexual, juicy, and lascivious thoughts about the young man. As
he walked over to her, she could feel yearnings and desires she had never felt
before in the presence of a man. She felt downright naughty, mischievous, horny,
and provocative.

“Oh, I’m sorry about that. I seem to have that effect on all women.
Anyway, good morning, Ann,” the young man said.

“I think I know you from somewhere,” she said while catching her
breath.

70
 “Certainly. You’ve known me from the first instance of your existence.
I’ve been with you all of your life.”

“I don’t understand. Who are you?”

“May I sit beside you, Ann? We need to have a little chat,” he said as he
sat down on the bench.

He had an outdoor tanned complexion, wavy blonde hair, bright blue

eyes, and he seemed vaguely familiar. He was very handsome, and just looking at
him continued to make her feel an intense glow under her whitey-tighties.

“I’m sorry, but I’ve seen you somewhere else.”

“Surely. In your dreams. I always try to assume a persona that my

followers will be comfortable with when I meet them. Today, I’m a composite of
several men from New York City. You might know me by one of my other
names. Belzeebub or Satan — Hitler calls me the Fuëhrer of the Dark Realm.”

“You’re Satan? The Devil?”

“Did you not tell Hitler that you wanted to meet me?”

“Yes, I casually mentioned it to him, but I had no idea you would

actually appear as a young motorcycle rider in black leathers.”

“Nor that the Big Gal would appear to us as a little old lady in a granny
dress?”

“Oh, this is all so incongruous! I’m apparently in a deep, deep coma in

the hospital. I’m slowly slipping out of my sanity towards oblivion.”

“Oh, it’s nothing like that, Ann. You are truly in Fascist Purgatory, and
what you are experiencing is quite real. The Big Gal created me at the dawn of
time so she would have a means of filtering out some of the more undesirable
gene pools throughout the universe. I help her with her personal eugenics
program. At Fascist Purgatory, ordinary Purgatory, and Hell we allow souls to go
through a final appraisal process so we can determine whether their genes are to
be used in the future of the species. The Big Gal gives me lots of freedom in the
Purgatories and Hell. In these venues I can work with some of the worst products
of her creation in an attempt to either rehabilitate them or obliterate their essence
back into the Yin and Yang of her creation.

“Yin and yang?”

“Yes, Ann. The Big Gal has created a universe in which there are
opposing forces from all sides of space and time, and in all of her life forms. I
71
am, as you humans say, a ‘necessary evil’. I am the Yang to her Yin. The hard to
her soft. The hot to her cold. Her universe is what the Chinese call the Tao.”

“But why does She allow souls like Saddam Hussein to exist there? Why
not just obliterate them?”

“We feel that as the universe has its natural fluctuations in time and
space, its positive and negative flows of electromagnetic energy, humans should
also be allowed wide fluctuations in their development. Sometimes, we actually
see benefits emerge from the existence of evil men like Edi Amin, for example."

"Yes, Idi has his good points."

"Sometimes, the conduct of you humans actually gives the Big Gal help
with furthering your species and your part of the universe. You are, after all, a
Petri dish experiment of the Big Gal that was designed to help her build a better
tomorrow."

"A Petri dish experiment? How demeaning."

"And, Ann, please consider that we all are nothing more than light,
electromagnetic energy. In this case, what you see before you is a hologram of a
thirty-year-old Caucasian man. We all are the Big Gal’s holograms. And, like
light, Ann, we have our positive and negative poles. Our monopoles of energy are
positive and negative. It is that humming fluctuation that gives Her the universal
life and energy She uses as She continually gives birth to galaxies and other
universes. Besides, you humans are sort of like a little chess game between me
and the Big Gal. We both enjoy watching you develop. She and I are constantly
checking and check mating each other as to your human growth and future.”

“So you are constantly working here with people like Hitler to promote
your agenda as to the workings of the universe?”

“Yes, and it takes a lot of talent. Perhaps you should recall the words of
Mark Twain, ‘We may not pay Satan reverence, for that would be indiscreet, but
we can at least respect his talents.’"

"I like Mark Twain.:

"He was one of my best products. Perhaps you will meet him one day.
You too, Ann, should respect my talents. Now, one of the things you can do is
cooperate with Adolph Hitler and work with him for your return to New York
City. It is there that we have planned for you to become a presidential candidate
in 2012. I want you and Sarah Palin to run for office on the Republican ticket.
Don’t let me down.”

“I have thousands of questions? I have —”

72
 “No, Ann. We don’t have time for idle talk. We have to get to Myrtle
Beach before mid afternoon. You wanted to get to know me. Okay. Get on the
bike behind me, and we’re off for the Saltwater Marsh Golf Club. You can caddy
for me.”

Ann got on the bike behind Him and they took off through a bright red
aura. Suddenly, she looked down and saw the ocean and a beach. He had
mentioned Myrtle Beach and a golf club. She had all kinds of fears and emotions.
Then, as she wrapped both arms around the Devil’s waist, pressing her breasts
into his back, and feeling the throb of the motorcycle seat beneath her
womanhood, she had no less than three climaxes before they came down onto a
fairway of a golf course.

As He stopped the bike, He said “You can get off now. There’s a golf
bag on a pull-cart beside that bench. You can pull it and caddy for me, Ann.”

She looked at him as an aura swept over him providing him with some
very stylish golf attire. As she felt an aura run down her body, she was suddenly
dressed in a sexy plaid little girl’s outfit with pigtails like she had envisioned
wearing in an attempt to seduce Voltaire.

“So, Ann, let’s begin. As we talk and walk, you can ask all the questions
you like. I do promise you one thing: all of your conversations with me will be in
the utmost confidence. The Big Gal has given me assurances that Hell is my
domain, and that what happens with me and mine stays with me.”

“So the directors will not know anything about my meeting you today.”

“Exactly. Now, Ann, you must try to make good decisions that will
affect your future. You will be returned to your body in New York City. If you
stay here, you will be made into a therapist in Fascist Purgatory, or be
permanently transferred to Hell, or be obliterated into non-existence. Oh, and I’m
sorry about your friend Jerry Falwell. You got his slot for the first speech you
attended with Hitler.”

“It was Jerry who was obliterated?”

“Yes, he couldn’t fit in. He even tried his beatific look on me. He did,
however, confirm what a lot of souls have said about Hell over the eons of time.”

“Yes.”

“It can be a paradise for fools.”

“Am I a fool?” she asked with obvious sadness in her voice.

“No, Ann, you’re just a victim of circumstance. You are not responsible
73
for the DNA in your body. That’s the Big Gal’s exclusive jurisdiction as you
lawyers say. That’s why Hell is like it is. It’s not a searing, sulfur fumed,
scorching place of brimstone and fire, rather it is place where you souls can stay
out your days without discernment.”

“Discernment?”

“Yes, in Hell you will no longer have the ability to discern the beauty of
God’s world created for you and yours. Fascists, especially, can only see the
glory of their perceived perfect government and their perceived heroism and
holiness. Outside of that, they can discern nothing much until such time as they
elect to be obliterated out of existence ― as most eventually do.”

“Sheesh!”

They played through the Green to Hole Number 12, which overlooked
the Intercoastal Waterway and miles of green-gold Spartina grass marshes.

“What's your current score?” she asked.

“I'm only two over for the last eleven holes. After this hole, we will talk
and walk some more. I want to play out the remaining seven holes before dark.

“I often get the impression that people have a continuous sympathy for
you?” she said as she began pulling his golf bag up to the tee box.

“Well, it's not a case of continuous sympathy, as you say. It might be

more accurate to say people treat me like all celebrities. That's to say, they accept
me as being in and out of fashion. It's more a cyclic thing. There are times when
they totally forget all about me, then the pendulum swings the other way and
people become fascinated and even obsessed with me. When my people fail me,
e.g., the recent losses by George Bush-43 and ‘Dubya’ Bush, my popularity
begins to wane.

“When we Americans think about you, we usually begin with the witch
trials of Salem, Massachusetts. That town executed nineteen of their own citizens
for allegedly consorting with you.”

“Actually, in addition to the nineteen people they brutally executed, five

others died from torture and other causes — allegedly for consorting with me.
Today, when someone might mention witches or my name, the people of Salem
feel they are either joking or they are terribly out-of-date as to their thinking.”

“If you were to recruit for additions to your minions, would you go to
Salem?”

74
 “Certainly not. First, I never have to recruit. Secondly, I surely would
not recruit from such a community of hysterical and impressionable people.
That’s why I stay away from the Washington, D.C. Finally, I do not have
minions. Remember, Ann. The Big Gal and I either recycle you humans or
obliterate you either voluntarily or involuntarily. I have very few souls hanging
around Hell.”

“Oh, Man. This is certainly not what my Lutheran ministers taught me.
Even the teachings of Martin Luther do not mention you in this manner.”

“Do we really have to discuss Luther? I find his entire history boring.
We do not have time to get into the long ministrations of Luther or any priest.”

“Well, the western world did place so much trust in his teachings. I don't
see how we can avoid mentioning him. What was your impression of Luther, the
man?”

“He had a certain amount of attractiveness as a priest in that he protested

the totally corrupt Church of his era — which I have always owned and
controlled. He was also absorbed with the idea that man was fighting alongside
God in His alleged battle against me. Luther was fond of saying that my powers
were limited, and I must stay here on Earth until doomsday when God will finally
come and save all of the faithful and dispense with me.”

“What's wrong with that idea - from Luther’s point of view?”

“Oh, it's just that Luther got carried away. He blamed me for everything
that happened to him and his followers in the 16th century. Listen to this little
saying of his: "The Devil begat darkness; darkness begat ignorance; ignorance
begat error; error begat 'free-will'...." Then he went on to blame me for every little
human ache and pain in his rather over-active mind. Luther was the product of a
very superstitious mother who taught him about hobgoblins and demons before
she taught him common sense. It's an old story. It has a Republicanesque quality
about it. There's one little joke the Catholic priests once told about him, it goes 'If
Martin was not spawned by the devil, he at least grew up beside him.' What they
were saying was that if Luther had not had his perverted views about me, he
would have had to invent me. He needed his devils and demons as a counterpoint
to his own narcissistic holiness. Luther preached that I was in a constant battle
with Christ, and that we were two equals who constantly fought over good and
evil. By encapsulating his parishioners in that battle, he maintained control over
them. It would have been better if he had concentrated on simply creating a good
church of good people.”

“Do I detect some disappointment about Luther making you and Christ
equal soldiers for two separate causes?”

75
 “It's not that I'm disappointed, rather I just do not like such inaccuracies.
Please consider that no human can reduce me to the level of a nice man like the
Nazarene. He was an exceptional human who was caught up is a maelstrom of
political and revolutionary zeal in the Middle east of his time. Such does not,
however, make him one-third of the Godhead as in the Christian Trinity.”

“But if he was the Son of God, as Luther maintains, he would be your

equal on your pantheon.”

“What pantheon?” he asked as he fitted a new red Cabretta golf glove on

his left hand. “How can any human divide the Godhead? How can any tiny speck
of time and energy like you or Luther do anything other than stand in awe of
God?”

“Now, you've got me confused. Let's move on and come back to that
subject. Leaving Luther's 16th century, I recall the 17th century was not much
different. John Milton wrote his famous Paradise Lost where you were portrayed
more like a chief executive officer who defied God from your world.

“Can one really defy God? I certainly did not defy God.”

“And in recent movies, you have been portrayed as a constant recruiter

and corrupter of humans you want to enlist in your minions.”

“Again, I have no minions. Ha . . . it's always 'the Devil made me do it.'

Quaint. I get blamed for all corruption. For example, the entire world surmises
that Adolph Hitler was either my son or I was in constant direct contact with him
during his time. Every time a serial killer runs amuck, he has the Devil in him.
When 16th century men saw a meteor enter the atmosphere, it was 'Satan like
lightning falling from heaven.'"

“So, you are not to blame for all of these things?” she asked curiously.

“Ann, I did not create you hominidae — the Big Gal did. How can I be
responsible for all of your actions?”

“I don’t know if I want to go there.”

“That might be wise.”

“Am I right when I say that modern religious leaders are trying to
divorce themselves from you?” she said changing the subject rather than discuss
the idea that God Herself was responsible for all of the world’s problems.

“Surely. It's no longer in vogue to tag every little mishap with 'the Evil
One.' The last pope did not believe in Hell or me. Even in America, the
fundamentalist evangelists have stopped preaching about Hell and me. They have
76
started converting their churches into motivational and psychological study halls.
Of course, Benedict XVI, your current pope believes that I am necessary and
should not be neglected. It's a case of my being constantly re-branded in the
minds of the public.”

“Let me ask you directly. Do you seek to bring mortals to sin?”

“Ann, it's impossible to answer that question. Sin is difficult to describe.

What's one man's sin is another man's sacred rite. It's all relative. Even though
you are living in the 21st century, you Americans still take such religious things
too literally. Your evangelists believe that I am a real, personal and constant
being in their lives, and they concentrate on exorcising me from their souls more
than they worship their so-called savior and the Big Gal. It's an amazing study in
people stupidly twisting their minds to work at even higher levels of stupidity.”

“Don't these people have a good reason to seek relief from what they
regard as evil influences on themselves, i.e., you?”

“Listen, I've been a damn good thing for writers like Dante, Marlowe,
Goethe, Mann and Singer. I've been the fall guy for men like Luther. The truth is
that I've been given some bad press for centuries. In your western world, I was
never even thought of by the people worshiping God until the Jewish Torah and
Christian New Testament came into existence. The ‘Satan’ thing started with the
Jews who had a priest who interrogated women about their virginity and beliefs
before admitting them into the faith; he was called the 'satan,' the 'Interrogator.'
He was not an evil man, he was a priest. Jump forward a few hundred years and
'satan' had become transformed into 'The Evil One' who was in charge of a
burning Hell replete with hot fires and the smell of burning sulfur. Might I also
interject most of these "Satanic" interrogations and involvements always revolved
around the sexual hang-ups of the priests, rabbis, and imams with their mothers,
childbirth, and the menstrual flag.”

“If that's the case, what or who exactly are you?”

“Well, modern writers tend to brand me as The Evil One — a stupid and
inaccurate name. Listen, Ann, the nature of my existence will vary depending on
the strength and depth of the human mind that analyzes it. While humans are now
trying to conquer the number of dimensions in their universe, you still have people
handling snakes and drinking strychnine in Appalachia to prove they are worthy
of being spiritually possessed by the Holy Ghost. At the same time you are
considering building new worlds between Earth and the Kuiper Belt, you have
fundamentalist bible-thumpers rolling in the isles of little churches in the Deep
South where they speak in unknown tongues and handle Rattlesnakes. What I am
trying to say is that you are still experiencing extremes in your understanding of a
spiritual world for yourselves. At your current state of development, it is
impossible for you to understand any concept such as the Godhead. Suffice it to
say the Big Gal is busy creating stars, planets, galaxies and dimensions of time.
77
But, I promised to speak to you in simple terms. So, consider this. Each time the
Godhead has seen fit to send a small amount of Herself to speak with man, man
has never tried to recognize Her nature or he has refused to do so.”

“Could I say that you are a part of the Godhead?”

“I am saying that you humans cannot state anything about the nature of
the Godhead. No little bag of salt water can describe the nature of the Creator of
the universe. Your priests endorse an ordination contract with their churches to
preach a certain dogma, and then they act like that paper gives them a direct
telephone line to the Godhead. They speak for the Creator, Jesus, Mary, their
saints, demons, and for me. Always, they speak for their deities. Think about it
— how can humans speak for their deities? You can only speak about God and
the other members of your manufactured pantheons — but never for Her."

“Your comments seem to destroy the platforms so many priests have

used to gain control over their flocks.”

“All man can do is stand in awe of the works of the Creator? Even I am
in awe of Her. You can look at all that has been created for you on this wonderful
planet, and you can contemplate about the meaning of the Creator. You can gaze
at the stars and their galaxies, and contemplate about your relationship to them,
but you cannot speak for God. In addition, is it not enough to just stand in the
presence of the beautiful creation known as Earth and marvel at God's handiwork
— like this golf course? Is it not enough to stand before blue oceans, blue skies,
beneath beautiful trees, and before salt marshes and realize that you are part of
that creation?”

“But how about consecration and being saved from the burning fires of
Hell? How about being born again, and rising above death to sit beside God,
Jesus and all the saints in Heaven after Judgment Day?”

“Oh, Ann, you're allowing that old Missionary Baptist and Lutheran
childhood and Catholic conversion to bubble up from your memories. You were
part of the creation of the Godhead before you were born into your current
existence. You will be part of the Godhead when you leave this existence and go
on to others. No matter what happens to your essence, it will be used by the
Godhead as needed. What I am saying is that you have never been destroyed, and
you never will be destroyed. You are a tiny part of the essence of the Godhead,
and you will continue to be such time after time as you go through your cycles. In
other words, in a primitive way of saying it, you are immortal; your atoms will
forever continue their journeys along pathways designed by God.”

“If that's the case — you are also part of the Godhead. You are saying
that you and I will be whatever the Godhead wants us to be. Then, you are I are
of the same essence?”
78
 “Once you accept that you are a part of God's universe, and you will
continue being part of God's universe, no matter what shape or form your atoms
take, all of the old beliefs become moot. There is no reason for you to seek
consecration or salvation. You have been, you are, and you will be. Now, that's
about it. I've reached the limit of this meeting. I hope I've helped you in some
way. Now, I would like to finish playing this delightful course. I've always said
this place was a little bit of Heaven on Earth. Perhaps I’ll bring you here again
one day, or on another course somewhere in time and space. Now, I'm going to
take my eight-iron and stick a ball within three feet of the pin on that green across
this water hazard they call a saltwater marsh. If there is a Hell on Earth, Ann, it
will be my not being able to play out this beautiful course before dark. So, let's
go.”

He stuck His ball next to the pin on Number 12, and made His birdie.
Ann walked along beside Him as He played the remainder of the course. He
finished three over par. He and Ann mounted his motorcycle. They drove
through a bright red aura and into the skies above Fascist Purgatory. She had two
more climaxes. He landed his bike on the little path near her apartment. She got
off the bike and stood beside Him.

“So, Ann, now you have an idea of how the Big Gal and I interface. By
the way, your questions were intelligent and very well shaped.”

“Well, I am a trial lawyer.”

“Right. Well, I have to go.”

“Oh, Lord Satan, my feelings for you. I need you. —”

“Oh, Ann. I’m a demigod. I don’t have anything to do with human

women. Why don’t you just stick with Idi’s Tool of Ecstasy? Now, let’s see how
well you play the game if and when you get back to New York City. Play the
game well, Ann, and I may have a special place for you in my realm,” He said as
He accelerated His engine speed, burned rubber spinning His bike around, and
shot through an aura of red dust, smoke and pulsing light.

She returned to her apartment and began thinking about a new strategy
for her return to New York City — with Idi. She sat for while thinking.

Satan is the Big Gal’s resonating opposite force; Idi is mine. Now I see
what He meant. He helps the Big Gal maintain a resonating harmony in the
universe. I’ll play His game. I must get back to New York City to fulfill my
destiny for Him ― and Idi.

79
CHAPTER 7

Changes

ANN BECAME determined to fight her way back to her body lying comatose in a
New York City hospital. Her conversation with Satan convinced her that she was
in possession of powerful allies who would help her return. She knew she had to
either capture the minds of the directors of Fascist Purgatory or simply overwhelm
them with a powerful argument. She went to the local market and acquired a
stack of legal pads along with some Number 2 pencils. She was about to prepare
a written analysis of her situation. She wanted to have a legal brief in her mind
the next time she encountered the directors and the issue of her return to Earth.

Ann worked feverishly for several days. During this period, her
relationship with Idi flourished.

* * *

Augmentation

One thing that concerned Ann was the shape of her body. She studied her breasts
and buttocks and decided that she wanted to augment them. She went to Eva to
see if there was a solution.

“Ann, I am certain the directors can arrange for the augmentation of your
breast and buttocks. I do not see why you are so concerned about them. You are
a naturally slim girl. You are not supposed to have big boobs and a bubbly ass.
Why are you so set on changing them?” Eva inquired.

“Oh, Eva. It’s for Idi. I love Idi so much, I want to give him any
pleasure I can. I would like to be a totally beautiful girl with a perfect body for
him.

“Hum. Well, you certainly did erase all of your racial prejudice didn’t
you?” Eva asked. “Have you considered you may be going back to New York
soon, leaving Idi behind?”

“Oh, Eva. Don’t talk that way. I couldn’t go without my Idi.”

“I’ll see what I can do about the boobs and butt.”

* * *

A ‘knock out’

80
AS ANN DEVELOPED her secret strategy for her return to New York City, she
also obtained argumentation of her breasts and buttocks. The first thing she did
was to cater another candlelight dinner for Idi.

After Idi arrived for dinner, he found Ann in a very thin and revealing
nightgown. She came into the living room and opened the front of her gown.

“Ann, there’s something about you that’s different. You’ve changed

somehow. I can’t place my finger on it.”

“It’s more than your finger I want tonight, Big Boy. Look closely. Do
you see anything different?” she said as the gown fell completely off and to the
floor.

“Oh, my Gawd! You have larger breasts, and your ass is larger!”

“Do you like them?”

“Yes. Why, you have a beautiful body. You’re what they call a ‘knock
out.’”

“And I did it all for you.”

“We African men do like big buttocks,” he said as he turned her around.
“You’ve out done yourself Ann. Your ass is magnificent.”

“Let’s skip dinner, Idi,” she moaned. “I think we can find things to do in
the bedroom,” she said as she pulled him down the hall to her room.

* * *

A tender gesture of love

VOLTAIRE, Benito, Freud, and Eva were at a table in the conference room of the
director’s office suite. Idi Amin sat across the table from them. Voltaire looked
at Idi with a cocked eyebrow. He and the other staff members had called Idi to the
office for a meeting about Ann.

“Well, Idi,” Voltaire began the meeting. “We’ve been observing you and
Ann quite a lot over the past few weeks. You are what the Americans call ‘pussy-
whipped.’ That blonde bimbo from New York City has completely screwed you
into a whimpering little boy. Just think, the former dictator of Uganda, murderer
of thousands, rapist of hundreds of women, and all around bad guy has been
reduced down to a pile of boyish mush by one little New York City lawyer —
with a new set of boobs and buttocks.”

81
 “I’m afraid I’m to blame for the boob and butt job. She seemed so
concerned about pleasing Idi I couldn’t stand in her way. I asked our physicians
to give her an augmentation,” Eva said.

“Well, what’s done is done,” Voltaire replied. “And, Idi, did you have
anything to do with the augmentation?”

“No, it was totally Ann’s idea. She wanted to surprise me. Frankly, I
was rather touched by her seeking surgery for me. It was a tender gesture of
love.”

“She is a rather convincing women when she wants something and sets
out to get it,” Benito commented.

“She does have her ways. And, she is frisky,” Idi said somewhat
sheepishly.

“Frisky? She’s turned into a nymphomaniac. Now, Idi. Her insatiable

hunger for sex with you is not the reason for this meeting. We all want to know
your true evaluation of Ann as to her rehabilitation,” Benito added.

“I agree,” Dr. Freud said. “Ann is one of the most manipulative

personalities I have ever examined. I am very concerned that she has totally
overwhelmed your judgment. I for one feel you should be taken off her case as a
therapist. How can you give us a true evaluation of your therapy as long as you
are in a constant battle between her blond Tool of Ecstasy and your black Tool of
Ecstasy?”

“Well, I know it appears a little unseemly, but you must trust me when I
say that Ann is a changed woman. She has come a long way as to her racial
prejudices. And, she has become a true lover of men, one that is now normal as to
her sex drive and experiences.”

“Eh! I agree with Benito. She is a nymphomaniac,” Dr. Freud said.

“Fuck you, Freud! Alright! Listen all of you,” Idi said clearly showing
some anger as to the way the meeting was going. “When Ann came here she was
a cold, bitchy, frigid woman who could not tolerate anyone outside her little
sphere of fascist thinking. She had never had a fulfilling experience with a man.
And, she had the typical fascist’s close-minded, narrow, negative views as most of
the arrivals here. Now, she shows new signs of being a normal woman, one who
loves a man of another race, and she is experiencing a healthy sex life for the first
time in her existence. What do you all do? You condemn her for making so much
progress. Pardon me! Let’s look at the situation. You, Voltaire,” Idi said
pointing a finger directly at the director. “The last time I studied your history I
discovered you were a little faggot that lived with rich women so you could have
sex with their male lovers to amuse them. And, Eva. You and Adolph had a
82
really strange and kinky sexual relationship. Benito! You were a typical little
macho Italian narcissist who thought the head of his cock was the center of the
world. And, Freud. Doctor Freud. You are one of the most fucked up sexual
perverts in history. Is it true that you even psychoanalyzed your daughter as to her
sexual ideations about you?"

The staff members were looking up at the ceiling, turning their heads
from one side to the other, or looking down at the floor. They had lost all eye
contact with Idi and each other. Idi had clearly nailed them to their psychic walls.
He sat before them with eyes blazing. He looked back and forth at each of them
and stood up.

“I think you are dealing with a terribly smart woman who will not take
your bullshit lying down. She may be deceiving us all, but there is no evidence of
that at this moment. I suggest that you reconsider your questioning of me today,
and that you begin questioning yourselves as to your motives. Know thyself! I
have work to do. So many fascists, so little time,” he said as he turned and walked
briskly out of the room.

83
CHAPTER 8

Two Commandments

ANN WAS SITTING on the bench beside the flowered stream near the public
urinal writing notes on a legal pad. She was working on a presentation for the
directors. Her thoughts, however, kept wandering back to a recent meeting with
Princess Scota. The two women had walked through the grounds and meadows
and had held a very detailed conversation about the origins of Ann’s faith and her
spirituality. It was during that conversation that the subjects of her Christianity
and the Big Gal came up.

“Scota, I’m still not sure about my Christian faith and how it relates to
Fascist Purgatory and my return to Earth,” Ann said.

“Well,” Scota replied, “your being a Christian has absolutely nothing to

do with your returning to Earth or not. You’ve been a Baptist, Lutheran, and you
are now a Catholic. None of your affiliations have anything to do with the Big
Gal and your situation.”

“I’m . . . not . . . sure I understand. I’ll try to develop a better grasp of

this conflict I am feeling if you’ll explain that last comment.”

“Let me suggest that you speak with people of all faiths who are here.
Remember that we do not single out any particular faith for favoritism here at FP.
We are all the Big Gal’s children.”

“Gee, that’s a nice way to look at it. Oh, I would truly like to meet Her
one-day. Do you think I will ever see the Big Gal when she visits FP?”

“We’ll see. She shows up from to time to time.”

“So, let me get this straight. It does not matter what religious
denomination I profess.”

“Exactly. What is important is whether you are a nice person or not.”

“I have to be a nice person?” Ann asked with a rather twisted look.
“You mean a really, really, nice-nice person?”

“Yes, Ann. Perhaps you should remember the two commandments of

Jesus Christ: love your god and do nothing to harm your fellow man. That’s it.”

“That’s it? Love the Big Gal? Be nice to others? I’ll . . .I’ll try.”

So, Ann strived to understand her faith a little better. She was caught
between the proverbial rock and a hard place. She had a deep Christian faith
84
given to her by her families’ Missionary Baptist and Lutheran dominations.
Additionally, just before her accident, she had converted to Catholicism. She had
heard that her good friend Newt had converted to the Catholic Church. Plus, her
broadcasting buddies Sean and Bill were Catholics. Nonetheless, and irrespective
of what Scota told her, she still felt duty bound to keep a deep faith in the dogma
of the Church on one hand, while on the other hand she had her logical analytical
mind which told her it was all a lot of bunk. Plus, the memory of Satan and His
remarks lingered in her mind and pulled against her Christian thoughts.

Of course, this did not lessen the cognitive dissonance in her mind, nor
its problem with constant splitting off into multiple avenues of mental stress.
Even though she knew she should not hurt others, she could not help herself. She
had constant thoughts of doing harm to all Democrats, Independents, Libertarians,
and other socialist leaning pinkos. She reminded herself to talk to Joe McCarthy
about it the next time she went to Hell — even though she would have to wear her
Wolensky blue dress and give Joe a hum job.

* * *

Smell the Roses

A couple of days later, she went to her little bench to work on her presentation
again. She first went into the urinal and wrote another horribly rhymed limerick,
which attacked liberals, initialed it, and returned to her bench. As she was
working on her notes, she noticed another woman coming down the path beside
the stream. She was an older woman, slight of frame, with grey hair up in a bun,
and wearing a little blue flowered grAnny dress with a white lace collar. She held
a bouquet of roses in her hands. As she approached Ann, she smelled her roses,
looked up, and smiled at Ann.

Ann suddenly felt the rush of a presence unlike anything she had ever felt
before. It was an overwhelming wave of love and warmth. She felt like she was
protected in her mother’s womb. She was happy, loved, warm, comfortable, and
totally in the grasp of the dissolving calm of a loving power that approached her.
Her world suddenly became harmonious and happy. She felt fantastic, like she
could accomplish anything with the love in her heart and mind.

“So, Ann, you wanted to speak with me?” the old woman asked.

“You’re . . . You’re — ?”

“That’s right. They call me the ‘Big Gal’ here. A rather amusing title,”
she said as she chuckled. “Here, let me sit beside you. Let’s have a little girl talk.
I understand you met Satan. He’s one of my more interesting creations. He
probably told you He’s the Yang to my Yin.”

“I had no idea . . . I would ever meet You,” Ann said in wonderment.

85
 “Now, Ann. Let’s get down to business. You are currently in a dilemma
about your faith in me on one hand and your logical mind that says it is not
necessary. And, you’re having problems giving up your tendencies to harm other
people.”

“Well, Big Gal, it has caused me concerns. Whether a Baptist or

Catholic, I have always been charged with showing an abiding faith in you and
Jesus. I have always been programmed to accept the teachings of my ministers
and Pope. All of it has left me terribly confused at times.”

“Confusion is what the priesthoods try to create. Let’s try to clear up a

few things. I never asked you to exhibit faith in me. I never asked you to be a
slave to any dogma. I never asked you to submit to anything other than being
born and living until you die.”

“But my church? My faith? The teachings from the time I was a baby?”

“Oh, Ann. They are all artificial faiths. Consider the fact that there are
hundreds of major religions on Earth presently. Which one would you have me
favor? You are all my children — so to speak.”

“But the universal Catholic Church and its protesting churches claim so
much. I was raised a Baptist, then a Lutheran, and now I am a Catholic. Surely,
these churches are to be given some position over all the others?”

“No. They are all artificial creations. I never created them. I never
created any religion on Earth. The hundreds of faiths that exist currently are the
creations of priests and political powers.”

“I’m not sure I understand. I thought that you, Big Gal, wanted us all to
exhibit a true faith in you.”

“True faith, as found in modern religion, is but a pipe dream.”

“But . . . this doesn’t make sense. How about worshiping you in the
confines of an established Church where we repent for our sins?”

“Oh, Ann. There is no such thing as sin. The word ‘sin’ comes from
your ancient Moon God Sin, also called Nana, who was part of the Sumerian
pantheon of mythological deities. Scota told you a few things about that
pantheon. Eventually the Jewish, Christian and Islamic scribes denoted ‘sin’ as a
separation from me. I never told any of you that you could attach to me. But,
whether you are ‘sinning’ or ‘worshipping’ you are all still my children. The
word has caused a lot of problems, and it has had many interpretations over the
centuries. “Original sin” has caused the persecution of millions of women. This

86
is one of the reasons we have Fascist Purgatory. The staff here tries to help you
overcome some of your programmed beliefs and deficiencies.”

“But should we not repent for our actions before you?”

“What you should do is learn from your actions. If you are hurting
others, for example, you should stop it.”

“But how do we reawaken our spirits except through worshiping you,

Big Gal?”

“Ann. Your particular dominations exalt the raising of your artificial

faiths above yourselves. Consider this. You do not need to be ‘born again.’ You
simply need to discover your true, inner self inside your souls. You don’t need to
discover me — you need to discover Ann.”

“I’m afraid this is more than I can handle. Now I’m more confused than
ever.”

“When I created the primordial feminine energy, I did not create it to

become absorbed in the Shamanic beating of drums beneath the moon, and
chanting nonsensical prayers and songs to me.”

“So all of the religious mumbo-jumbo since the dawn of time has been
for nothing?”

“More or less. Consider this. I didn’t create you with a purposeful intent
that you spend all of your conscious awareness worshipping me. Rather, your
creation occurred when you accidentally crawled out of some primordial mud on
Earth. You evolved through several stages of microbiological life, and then
evolved into fish-like creatures. In fact, you still have gills in your embryonic
stage when in your mother’s womb. Next you went to a larger reptilian stage.
That’s one of your problems. It’s that reptilian brain that is causing you so much
trouble in your current mammalian thinking.”

“So, I have to control my reptilian brain?”

“Yes. But, Ann, when a man or woman ingests too much alcohol and
cocaine at university, they often reek havoc on their mind’s ability to control their
reptilian brain. Like you did at university.”

“You know? Of course, you know. Okay. I admit that I did drink a lot
of alcohol and snort a lot of cocaine at school. It was the only way I could get
passing grades from my professors. Booze, alcohol, and blowjobs. That’s all
those bastards knew. So, I over did it?”

87
 “Yes. Now, Ann, consider this. Your species next evolved into higher
mammals you call the hominidae. You began a multiple evolutionary drive into
several branches of your species. Your particular branch broke away from the
chimpanzees and great apes about 7 million years ago. After that, you lived a
rather nondescript evolution. About 400,000 years ago you became really
interesting as a species. I guess it was that opposing thumb that did the trick. You
and the chimpanzees and great apes learned how to make tools with that thumb.
When you started making stone tools and killing each other with them in the form
of weapons, I created Satan to help me keep some balance in your species. As he
says, he is ‘Yang to my Yin.’

“So, I’m an evolved fish, reptile and monkey,” Ann said with apparent
distain.

“Exactly. Now, as I said, it’s that reptilian brain in your head that is
causing you trouble. Your brain has three parts: reptilian, limbic and neo-cortex.
Your reptile brain controls your aggression, mating, and response to danger. The
long-term effects of powerful chemicals can skew your brain’s efficiency. If you
have a pre-existing tendency to be a personality problem, your symptoms can
become more pronounced by the chemicals. For example, your pre-existing mild
borderline personality disorder became accelerated to the degree that you became
a serious borderline always striking out at people as a broadcaster and writer.”

Ann had lowered her head. Her eyes were squinted and tearful. Her face
was red. She was clearly under distress. “I know you are the Big Gal, and I
know you created this universe and others, and I know that what I am getting
ready to say may result in my obliteration, but I have to know one thing. Why did
you do this to me? And why don’t you correct all of my undesirable problems?”
Ann asked with anguish.

“Oh, Ann. I don’t go back and make corrections. And, I don’t allow
Satan to make any.”

“Why? Why not? It would be so easy.”

“It’s not the way He and I play the game. If we corrected every defect in
your gene pool, you would never take-off into new and interesting human
characteristics. Your faults are the things that give you your personalities.”

“So, we’re condemned to live out our lives with your defective genes?”

“Ann, you are allowed to reincarnate and cycle back into humanity. You
can always live better lives in another existence. In the meanwhile, you are
serving my purposes in your current cycle.”

“So, what do I do?”

88
 “Consider this: from the time you were a tiny microorganism until today,
I allowed you to evolve to procreate and populate your world. I gave you a free
will with which to think and act. Unfortunately, most men and women do not use
that free will — it’s a design defect I never corrected. Use your free will, Ann.”

“Is this all just a trick? Any I still in my body at the hospital slowly
going mad and dying?”

“No, Ann. What you see before you is a hologram of a tiny piece of my
total essence that exists throughout my universes. A small part of me has been in
Fascist Purgatory since its creation. Satan and my image here are both are tiny
holograms as are you. You all are light. You all are electromagnetic energy that I
allow to ebb and flow in the currents of my universes.”

“Universes?”

“Oh, yes. There are many. It’s an issue of quantum physics you do not
need to be concerned with. Suffice it to say I am in existence throughout my
universes, but that I have assigned a tiny part of myself to you and your world for
all time. What I would like you to think about is that I am that I am. By the way,
Satan is not a baby-blood drinking bogeyman, rather he is has been placed here by
me as a counterpart to many of my forces"

"I found him to be charming, entrancing."

"Yes, most women feel that way about Him. I found it necessary to
create Him to give humans a little more breadth and depth. Here in Fascist
Purgatory you will find both positive and negative forces pulling at you. It’s true,
your universe is my Tao. It has its Yin and Yang forces. You must decide which
forces you will allow to influence your decision-making. Satan has a habit of
mentioning that you humans are in a Petri-dish experiment of mine. Let me
assure you that it is more than that. I dearly care about you all. It’s just that I
must allow you to develop naturally along the lines of my original creation. I will
not step in and micromanage your genetics; rather I will allow you to continue
evolving. It is that struggle in your heart and mind that will ultimately decide the
future of mankind. At this stage of your development, I will not interfere with it.
It’s a little divinity game I like to play. Once I start a divine course of action, I
like to see it run its course naturally and without too much undue interference.”

“When I look at the history and course of our religions, I can see how
you might want to simply eradicate all of us and start over again.”

“The thought has crossed my mind, but it’s not that bad. Humans have
murdered and burned each other at the stake in my name. Their priesthoods have
always been immoral and vicious in every sense. Your priests usually work with
political movements in order to help each other defraud their followers. It’s an
old story. But, Ann, there are also humans who work to help others, to build good
89
societies, and to cultivate compassion. I want to see what you will be like when
you build worlds out in the Kuiper Belt and beyond.”

“What should I study? What should I learn before going back? I’m
totally lost.”

“Well, I don’t expect you to remember six or seven impossible divine

things to do before breakfast each morning. Why don’t you and Idi work together
to establish a common set of beliefs and values? I think Idi will tell you that it is
the positive approach to life that has always obtained better results in Fascist
Purgatory.”

“I didn’t expect to fall in love so deeply with Idi. He has completely

changed my life.”

“Yes. Your love affair with Idi, a former mass murderer, is a surprise to
all of the directors. Your reptilian brains have been working overtime with your
mating urges.”

“I can’t return to Earth without him.”

“You and Idi bear out the idea that the rules governing the human world should
never be written in stone. Humans go through experimentation, blunders, errors,
and incompleteness only to sometimes emerge from all of life’s tragedies as
wonderful examples of compassionate men and women.”

“Yes, but what happens when you do meet someone that gives you this
ability and then you foresee separation from them?”

“I can’t give you any guarantees to your problem as to your reincarnation

with Idi or otherwise. As I said, I never promised you that I would micromanage
you. I set you in motion, it’s now up to you to obtain those things you want from
your universe – and that includes Idi.”

“I see.”

“Mankind’s wisdom grows out of a lot of trials and errors. You both have
shown that you can learn — at least you and Idi learned to love each other.”

“Yes, at least we have that.”

“Let me give you a few more things to think about, Ann. One of the
reasons I have placed a part of myself here in Fascist Purgatory is that I am very
pleased with many of the things humanity has accomplished. You humans are
amazing. While you degenerated into committing murderous genocides in Africa,
you have also discovered the X-ray. While you persecuted people of other faiths
with acts of violence, you discovered the CAT-Scan machine. You waged war on
90
each other in the name of oil and gas, but you also discovered the MRI machine.
Now, after learning a great deal about atomic energy and quantum physics, you
are trying to create a black hole and a small universe at Cern. You are currently
planning to build huge artificial worlds in the Asteroid and Kuiper Belts. You are
tinkering with my time continuums. I wouldn’t miss your future development for
anything. But, there are certain elements of your society that could use some
adjustments. I hope, Ann, that you will be able to return to your world and do
some good in that regards.”

“I’ll . . .I’ll . . .try. Idi and I will try.”

“Ann, let me also remind you of a few other things. I am not a jealous
God. There are no other gods I could be jealous of. I placed you all in motion in
the Order I created in this universe. You should not forget that I also created the
Chaos of this universe. Out of Order and Chaos, your Tao — as the Chinese say
— was created. In that Tao, there are Yin and Yang forces. The secret is that you
should learn how to balance yourself between them. Use your free will, Ann.”

“I think I see —”

The Big Gal disappeared in an aura of shimmering gold and white light.
Ann sat on the bench for almost an hour. Her mind was thinking clearer. She
knew she had a challenge. She was not sure she could handle it. She was not sure
she and Idi could handle it.

91
CHAPTER 9

Undue Hardship

“I HAVE TRIED to explain to myself how most people value fair treatment in
their dealings with others. I must say that I have not had fair treatment here in
Fascist Purgatory,” Ann said firmly.

“We are sorry you feel that way,” Voltaire responded somewhat
nonchalantly to Ann’s opening remark at a scheduled conference concerning her
personal development.

“I have listened to all of you, I met with Satan, and I have spoken with
the Big Gal. Now, I have a few things I would like to say to you. First of all, I
move you to make a decision as to my returning to Earth with Idi as soon as
possible.”

“That will be impossible,” Voltaire said. “We’ve not promised you

anything about returning with Idi, remaining here on the staff, or going to Heaven,
Hell or otherwise.”

“Exactly,” Benito added. “Plus, Ann, let me remind you this is not a
court. You can’t make a legal motion for us to consider. You are not in a trial.”

“On the contrary, Benito. You might find that we all are in a trial with
the Big Gal. First, ordinary Purgatory and Fascist Purgatory are both designed to
purify the soul and assist it towards reincarnation, Heaven, Hell or obliteration.
Let’s look at what you have done here.”

“You are way out of order,” Dr. Freud exclaimed.

“Fuck you Freud! Now, are you fuckers going to preclude me or will
you allow me to speak?”

“Ann, please. . .calm down,” Idi said sheepishly.

“No, Idi, my love. It’s time I spoke out. It’s time I defended myself and
you. It’s time you and I returned to Earth to do some good. But first, I want to
tell these so-called directors what I think of them.”

“You’re not helping your situation, Ann,” Eva said somewhat concerned.

“Knowing I’m a graffiti writer, you create the opportunity for me to

deface urinal walls, and then you condemn me for it. You send me to Hell to
listen to Hitler knowing full well I would be influenced by his personality. You
exposed me to Joseph Goebbels, one of history’s most devious men. Then, you
expose me to Joe McCarthy who is a devious but helpless and hopeless fruit loop.
92
Then, you expose me to Idi, and you hoped he would cure some of my frigidity
problems with his Tool of Ecstasy, and then move on to other women. Little did
you know we would fall in love. Satan takes me to Myrtle Beach and plays a
round of Golf with me during which he tells me he is the Yang to the Big Gal’s
Yin, but he really offers me no solutions. Then you repeatedly attack my political
beliefs to which I admit having many faults, but you do not offer any real
solutions to my society’s current problems. You and Freud constantly attack my
mental health and sexuality. Now, you attack my currently rich sex life and
belittle me in that regards. It’s all an undue hardship.”

“Oh, Ann,” Eva interjected, “we were just trying to get you to realize the
errors of your ways.”

“Thanks, Eva, but the Big Gal told me that what I really needed to do
was to discover myself and use my own free will. Well, I have. I am a woman
who loves her man and I want to return to New York City with him to forge a new
future.”

“Are you sure you can function in the Republican Party, and accomplish
those things the Big Gal might want of you?” Benito asked.

“Benito, what I discern of the Big Gal’s desires is that she really does not
care about my political leanings or writings so long as I stop hurting others. Now
that I have talked with her, I do love her. I now realize that I should not do any
acts that hurt others. Scota set me straight on that, as did the Big Gal. We should
all follow the two commandments of Jesus and love our God and not do anything
that hurts our fellow man.”

“You’ve come a long way, Ann,” Princess Scota said.

“Thank, you Princess. Now, I admit it. The grand majority of the
Republican men in my world are little pantywaists. Benito, you did a good job of
making me realize that only a handful of Republicans in Congress actually served
in the military, and are actually true and loyal Americans. You made it clear that
the Democrats’ military service outweighs the Republicans. I realize that most of
my Neocon men are constantly waving the American flag on their lapels
exclaiming that they are the most loyal and heroic Americans while they are
actually little political pussycats.”

“Yes. The Medals of Honor, Silver Stars, Bronze Stars and Purple
Hearts received by members of Congress are three to one in favor of the
Democrats,” Benito observed.

“And, Scota, you made me realize that most of the western religions in the world
are dedicated to the oppression of women. Now that I can see more clearly, I see how the
Republican men of America have used the fundamentalist Christian lines of bullshit to
dominate and control their women. And, I feel you all must admit — without reservation
93
— that I, a woman of German and Irish descent, truly love Idi Amin, a man of African
descent.”

“You are at last making some sense with this tirade of yours,” Freud observed.

“You should have either allowed me to awaken and continue my life, or you
should have sent me on to Hell. But, you brought me to this place where I am constantly
judged by a group of incompetent fuckups.”

“Ann, please,” Idi implored.

“Scota taught me the Judeo-Christian godhead is actually four gods. Why was I
submitted to this great wrong all of my life? Next, I learn that my church screwed up my
original ideas about Adam and Eve, and made me believe that women had committed the
Original Sin and created The Fall. Will you note that many of my opinions and my
writings come from the falsehoods in those doctrines? My evolutionary processes on Earth
have screwed me. Plus, you screwed me as I came through the door of FP.”

“In what way?” Voltaire asked.

“Rather than original Purgatory, I discover that I am in Fascist Purgatory.

Purgatory is for purification. What you have done is the reverse. You have exposed me to
some of the greatest political and psychological lines of horse manure in the history of
mankind.”

“A point well taken,” Idi agreed.

“And,” she continued, “when you brought me here to ‘purify’ me, there was an
implied promise of fairness and equity.”

“Yes, one could say that,” Eva agreed.

“All of you, except Idi, have frustrated the purpose of Purgatory and my being
here. This is all a sham!”

“Did you know your husband is having affair with the little red head from around
the corner in your apartment complex?” Dr. Freud asked with a cocked eyebrow.

“Fuck you Freud! Don’t try to divert me with a Sarah Palin creatively artificial
comment. You’re trying to draw me away from the real issue. You people have fucked up
big time! Either send me to regular Purgatory, Heaven, Hell, back to my body, or
obliterate me. Just don’t sit there on your hands and act like you are accomplishing
anything here. This entire scheme of things is a lot of unmitigated bullshit. The idea that
the Big Gal would do this to one of her creations is just bullshit. Bullshit! Nothing more.
And, Satan told me personally that this bullshit is just a little chess game between Him and
the Big Gal. Well, I want out! Take me off the chessboard! Beam me up Scotty!”

94
 “You’re excused, Ann. You will please leave the room. We all will discuss your
comments and let you know of our decisions shortly,” Voltaire said firmly.

* * *

A ruling is made

”We can’t send her to Hell where she will reek havoc on Hitler and his gang of thugs.
We're damned if we do and damned if we don't. There's only one thing to do,” Voltaire
said as he looked at the nodding heads of his companions who signaled him he was correct
as to a solution. “I vote Aye,” he said with his eyes closed to slits.

“Aye,” Eva said.

“Aye,” said Benito.

“Aye,” said Sigmund

“Aye,” said Scota.

“Oh . . . this is horrible,” Idi responded. “I'm abstaining from voting. Listen,
please do me a favor and give me a few extra days. Some extra time won’t hurt. I believe,
with the right counseling, I can still save Ann. I know she's a pain, but she doesn't deserve
obliteration," Idi said with great sadness in his voice.

“You have two and one half days. At 1200 Noon on the third day, the Cherubim
will carry out our orders. In the meanwhile, I will clear our ruling with the Big Gal and ask
that Satan add His comments to our decision.

95
CHAPTER 10

Important News

AT EXACTLY 1100 AM, Ann and Idi were having a late breakfast. She wanted to finish
eating in order to go to an early afternoon service for the Big Gal. At the end of their
breakfast, Idi became rather serious as he addressed the issue of the pending decision of the
directors.

"Ann, I have some very important news for you. Two days ago, after you left us,
they took a second vote. I abstained, and the directors proceeded without me and decided
your fate."

"My fate?"

"Yes, you see, they say they cannot send you to Heaven, nor can they send you to
Hell with Adolph and the two Joes. Today, at precisely 1200 Noon, Cherubim will carry
out the execution of the directors' decision."

"So, the cowards decided to obliterate me? Alright, I'll take it like a woman!" she
said. “Idi,” she said breaking out in tears, “ I want you to find another good woman. Do
not go through time without a good woman who loves you at your side. Return to Earth
and carry-out our dreams.”

Ann had no way of seeing the two golden Cherubim approaching her from an aura
behind her. They suddenly swooped down, and clutched her in their feet and flew away
with her before she could say anything. Just as suddenly, they disappeared in a flash of
blue-gold light.

"Sheesh!" Idi exclaimed. He looked at his 24 caret gold chronometer and saw it
was precisely 1200 Noon.

Ricochet

It was early in the morning of a beautiful spring day in New York City. It was April
2009 and Wall Street was getting ready to engage in more of its terribly complex
defrauding of America and the world of money. Rudy Guiliani was dreaming of
being president and ruler of the world. Mayor Michael Bloomberg was dreaming that
becoming ruler of the world would be acceptable to him without his ever being
president. Bill Clinton was dreaming of blue dresses from his apartment near his
office in Harlem. And the world turned.

Ann awoke in her body in the hospital. At first, she was in an incoherent
state of mind, vacillating in and out of consciousness. The nurses called her family to
inform them that she was coming out of her coma. She would awake and cry “Idi.
Idi, my love. Where are you Idi?” to only collapse back into an unconscious state.

96
 Her husband came by and visited her during one of her periods of
unconsciousness. He sat by her bed for one minute, and then left the hospital for an
early breakfast with the red head that lived down the hall from his and Ann’s
apartment.

Her secretary came by, sat by her bed for two minutes, and left the hospital.

Her agent came by and heard her cry “Idi, my love. They can’t keep us
apart!” He immediately began asking who this Idi person was. Possibly he could be
another contract opportunity Ann never told him about.

Her priest came by and delivered a short prayer at the foot of her bed, and
then he left for a morning round of golf with his bishop.

Her psychologist came by and asked the nurses when Ann could go back to
work. It seems Ann still owed him a couple of thousand dollars.

Eventually, Ann was scheduled for release. On the day of her release, she
used her cell phone to call her secretary. She had a long list of things she wanted
done.

“Call my lawyer and tell him I want a quick divorce in Las Vegas from
what’s his name.

“Call my agent and tell him to kiss my ass. I’ll be seeking new
representation.

“Call my shrink and tell him he’s fired.

“Call all of the T.V. and cable networks and tell them I have a new attitude,
and I need to appear on their shows to Announce it, and my plans for the presidential
election in 2012.

“Call my beautician and tell her I’m on my way to her place for a complete
‘do.’”

“Oh, call Sarah Palin and tell her I need a conference call with her. A highly
confidential call. Tell her we need to have some ‘presidential girl talk.’”

So, Ann went to her beautician and got a new hair style. Rather than the old
stringy blonde hair, she had her hair cut shorter and put in an attractive shoulder
length hair style that would be acceptable in any boardroom.

She went to her favorite clothing store and bought a new wardrobe of
summer dresses and accessories. At the store, she decided to wear a beautiful yellow
and flowery dress with matching yellow medium heels out of the store.

97
 She was on top of the world. She had so many things to do. She had one
final stop across the avenue. She wanted to shop for a new party dress with which she
could impress everybody at the soirées she intended to attend now that she was
recovered. Also, she would call all of her contacts and let them know she was back in
action.

She took a break in shopping and went to her favorite bar for lunch. She had
the Crepes Suzette with Champagne. When she went to the toilet she saw a freshly
painted white wall. It was too much. She took out an indelible pen and wrote another
horribly rhymed limerick.

A Democrat slut named Lou

Was in church because she was blue.
When the minister shouted “Sin!”
She cried “You can count me in
as soon as the service is through!”

A.H.O’R.C.

Having satisfied her antisocial craving to deface private property, she left the
bar and walked down the sidewalk on Seventh Avenue. She looked up at the
buildings and felt at home. This was her city. New York City was her base of
operations. It was here that she had serious contacts with all of the key executives
and talents in the television and cable television networks. It was here that she knew
publishers who could give her the publishing she desired. New York City was the
place where she could obtain the platforms she needed for her new course of writing
and broadcasting. It was also the place where she could launch her campaign for
public office.

* * *

Check and mate

The directors were holding an outdoor meeting along side the stream that ran through
Fascist Purgatory.

“She can’t stop writing on urinal walls. I’m not sure what we did was right,”
Eva said.

“Did you notice that she intends to run for public office with Sarah Palin?”
Benito asked.

“That part worries me. She may claim she is reformed, but Palin is not,”
Freud added.

98
 “Well, I think you should give her the benefit of the doubt. You people have
a tendency to jump too quickly,” Idi observed. “Besides, Palin may not be receptive
to Ann.”

“I think we should wait until we see her do a couple of broadcasts and write
a couple of commentaries,” Scota said.

Suddenly, a gold and white aura began glowing beside them. The Big Gal
came through it and stood in front of them.

A red aura began glowing and Satan came through it and stood next to the
Big Gal.

Then, a large aura of blue-yellow light opened to reveal Ann walking down
Seventh Avenue. She was bouncing along carrying a couple of her shopping bags.
She came to an intersection and waited for the walk light to change. It changed, but
she hesitated for a moment to adjust her bags on her shoulder, and then she started
across the street somewhat late as to the timing of the walk sign.

Ann saw a young black man her age across the street standing at the opposite
curb. He look just like Idi!

“Idi! Idi! My Love! Oh, they reincarnated you for me! Idi! We’re
together!” she yelled as she began running between the pedestrian lines as the light
changed from red to green against her.

At that instance, there were two heavy panel trucks heading in her direction.
The local Democrat Party owned the vehicles. One was a Hillary Clinton campaign
truck that had been recently used in the senator’s bid to be the Democrat Party’s
presidential candidate. The other truck was a Barack Obama campaign truck that had
been used in the Obama-McCain race. Both drivers were trying to get ahead of each
other so they could drop their trucks at their local garage for reconditioning and
removal of all campaign decals and stickers so they could be used in the 2012
campaigns. As they raced down Seventh Avenue, they were inattentive of a yellow
blur running across the street from their right. The Clinton truck struck Ann with the
left end of its front bumper, hurling her up into the air and down in front of the
Obama truck which ran over her, killing her instantly.

As Ann’s brain was smashed by the front tire of the Obama truck, she went
into another blackness.

The directors watched as her soul was sucked up towards Fascist Purgatory
and through the aura. Ann’s soul went flying up into the sky above the directors, the
Big Gal, and Satan. Then, she was sucked back down into the aura where it appeared
that she was traveling over the Earth towards Africa.

99
 In the backwaters of Uganda, a large black woman was in the final stage of
birthing labor. As she made one final push, she gave birth to a very fat, very black,
and very ugly baby boy with a very large penis. Ann’s soul entered the baby who
immediately began crying in a very loud and angry voice.

The mother named him ‘Idi.’

“That’s a nice looking baby boy,” Idi Amin said.

Satan looked at Big Gal with a forlorn countenance as She turned to Him,
smiled, and said “Check and mate.” He immediately disappeared in his crimson red
aura.

The Big Gal next turned to the directors and asked, “You didn’t really think I
was going to allow her back in New York City?” She then turned and walked through
Her shining diamond aura into the black depths of space. She had administered Her
universal justice and wisdom to the tall, thin, blonde, blue-eyed, borderline, bitch
lawyer Annie Hannity O’Reilly Coltrane.” *

FINI

*There are many blonde bitch borderline lawyers in New York City. Any similarity,
however, to any blonde bitch borderline lawyers suffering the mental illnesses of the
central character in this novella of urban fantasy and fiction, and involved in
broadcasting and writing in New York City is strictly accidental and coincidental.

100