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Indian Institute of Technology Kanpur

Department of Humanities and Social Sciences


COM200 (Communication Skills: Composition)
2015-16-II

Tutorial VIII: Concision I


March 3, 2016
Concision: Eliminating the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak.
Example Paragraph
The point I want to make here is that we can see that the government policy in regard to
countrywide dissent in the Campuses, as the Home Ministry in Delhi and the South Block has
put it together and made it public to the world, has given moral support to too many hooligans in
the national capital who called the shots and unleashed violence on the university students as
well as the unsuspecting media people covering the events in the court as they unfolded.
Revision 1
I believe that the government policy on countrywide dissent in the Campuses, put together and
made public by the Home Ministry, has given moral support to too many hooligans in the
national capital who unleashed violence on the university students as well as the unsuspecting
media people covering the events in the court.
Revision 2
The government policy on dissent in the Campuses has given moral support to hooligans in the
national capital who unleashed violence on the university students as well as the unsuspecting
media people covering the events in the court.
Revision 3
The government policy on dissent in the Campuses has promoted hooliganism resulting in
violence on the university students and media persons covering the court proceedings in the
national capital.

Exercise I
Remove the redundancy from these sentences.
1. Critics cannot avoid employing complex and abstract technical terms if they are to
successfully analyze literary texts in a meaningful way.
2. Scientific research generally depends on fully accurate data if it is to offer theories that will
allow us to predict the future in a plausible way.
3. In regard to desirable employment in teaching jobs, prospects for those engaged in graduateschool-level studies are at best not certain.
4. Notwithstanding the fact that all legal restrictions on the use of firearms are the subject of
heated debate and argument, it is necessary that the general public not stop carrying on
discussions of pros and cons in regard to them.
5. Most likely, a majority of all patients who appear at a public medical clinical facility do not
expect special medical attention or treatment, because their particular health problems and
concerns are often not major and for the most part can usually be adequately treated without
much time, effort, and attention.
6. As you carefully read what you have written to improve wording and catch errors of spelling
and punctuation, the thing to do before anything else is to see whether you could use sequences
of subjects and verbs instead of the same ideas expressed in nouns.
Exercise II
Where appropriate, change the following negatives to affirmatives, and do any more
editing you think useful.
1. Except when expenses do not exceed Rs. 1000/-, the insured should not refuse to provide the
insurer with receipts or other evidence of costs.
2. There is no possibility in regard to a reduction in the size of the fiscal deficit if reductions in
spending are not introduced.
3. Do not discontinue medication unless symptoms of dizziness and nausea are not present for
six hours.
4. No one should be prevented from participating in cost-sharing educational programs without a
full hearing into the reasons for his or her not being accepted.
5. No agreement exists on the question of an open or closed universe, a dispute about which no
resolution is likely as long as a computation of the total mass of the universe has not been done.

6. So long as taxpayers do not engage in widespread refusal to pay taxes, the government will
have no difficulty in paying its debts.
Exercise III
Try deleting every adverb and every adjective before a noun, then restore only those that
readers need to understand the passage. In the following passage, which ones must be
restored:
In the 2001 Bollywood film Lagaan, a deprived and poverty-stricken Indian village takes on the
might of the indomitable and invincible nineteenth-century British Empire though a trivial and
inconsequential game of cricket. The wager of the game is that the poor underprivileged villagers
will pay extra taxes if they lose, and none if they win. The celebrated and very well-known
Oscar-nominated film is full of unparalleled suspense, as the future of the village hangs
precariously in the balance, but the grand story is fictional and in the end the village wins
convincingly. Nearly ninety years earlier, an entirely different, and this time real sporting story
gripped India tightly. In 1911, the Mohun Bagan football team secured compelling victory after
victory against mighty English teams. Increasingly, the victories fired the resolute passion of
Indias independence movement against the British Raj. When Mohun Bagan reached the final
against the East Yorkshire Regiment, which had, until then, completely dominated the Indian
Football League, tens of thousands travelled from all across the vast country to witness the
celebrated historic game on July 29, 1911. There were no proper spectator stands. Spectators at
the back of the crowd could barely see what was happening on the field. In a riveting game, the
Mohun Bagan players competed barefoot against the booted British team. The fearless and
daring Indian team came from a goal down to score twice in the last five minutes. The historic
and momentous 2-1 victory by the feeble colonized over the mighty colonizers triggered huge
massive celebrations, both on and off the field. This was not just a sporting victory. Football and
pro-independence sentiment had become inevitably and inextricably intertwined.
STEP 1. Delete all adjectives and adverbs.
STEP 2. Restore those that must be restored.
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