Research Assessment #3:

Date: October 27, 2016

Subject: Nursing
MLA or APA Citation: DeMarco, Peter. "A Letter to the Doctors and Nurses Who Cared
for My Wife." The New York Times. NY Times, 6 Oct. 2016. Web. 27 Oct. 2016.

Analysis:
This article told the story of Peter DeMarco during the last week of his wifes life.
To better understand the role of nurses, beyond completing a checklist or charts, I
studied this letter, written to the nurses and doctors that cared for Laura Levis after what
ended up being a fatal asthma attack.
Peter DeMarco surprisingly shared his story and instead of being filled with grief,
sorrow, and depression, he was overflowing with gratitude and love for the health care
professionals that cared for his wife. The details in his story made me reflect on what
nurses do that is sometimes overlooked or gone unnoticed. Nurses should not only
complete patients charts, record vitals, and administer medication, but should also
make sure the patient is as comfortable as possible. The nurses in DeMarcos story
comforted Laura by fixing her gown and by putting blankets over her, even though she
was unconscious. They would talk to her, even though they didnt know if she could
hear them or not. These little jobs and favors that nurses do are, for me, what makes
nursing so rewarding because one knows that they are not only keeping their patient
alive, but also knows that he/she has done everything possible to help the welfare of
that person.
DeMarco spoke of how the nurses not only cared for Laura, but for the family too.
As I consider specializing in pediatric nursing in my career, I am reminded that I will talk
to the parents a ton. The nurses that helped Lauras family filled them in with any
medical information or updates, but also talked to them about Laura to help them heal
through dealing with a dying family member. What stood out most was how the nurses
allowed DeMarco and his wife one hour of uninterrupted alone time after chaos of
having many, many visitors want to say their goodbyes and give condolences. That hour
is something that would be very meaningful for anyone in DeMarcos situation and it left
a lasting impression on how the doctors and nurses shaped their hospital stay.

From the story, one concludes that Laura passed away while waiting for her
organ donation surgery. This reminded me that nursing will not always be enjoyable and
I will have to overcome sorrow of dying patients and telling families to say their
goodbyes to one of their family members. Although this is difficult to think about, I
remind myself of how rewarding it will be to help those who will eventually walk
themselves out of the hospital and carry on with their lives.
As an extension of this story of DeMarcos experience, I reflected on my hospital
experience when I got surgery on my foot in December of last year. I remember the
nurse coming in to ask me pre-op questions. Instead of just going through the list of
questions, I remember him making it fun and I felt as though he wanted to get to know
me as a person, not just as a patient. He asked me about my hobbies, dance, and other
personal information, which definitely calmed my nerves before my operation. I also
remember another nurse coming in to give me drugs. She, too, spoke to me and
listened to my answers. She made me feel welcome and at ease.
Nurses not only heal patients physically, but emotionally as well. As one aspiring
to pursue a career in nursing, I am excited to be able to have a job that is as rewarding
as this. Although it sounds cheesy, I want to make a difference in todays society and I
feel I can do that by improving peoples hospital experience by assuring and proving
that I care for and about my patients and their family members or visitors. Although this
story was heartbreaking that despite all the nurses efforts, Laura wasnt able to make it
through, her story is still one of success for the nurses at the CHA Cambridge Hospital.
This is because their actions still made a difference because they made Lauras
husband feel well taken care of and valued. I hope to one day instill that feeling in my
patients hearts and in whoever visits my patients. Lastly, I want to make my patients
who dont have any family members or friends or visitors to visit them feel so loved and
valued so that they may have the ambition to push their bodies back to health, instead
of giving up hope.

Article:
After his 34-year-old wife suffered a devastating asthma attack and later
died, the Boston writer Peter DeMarco wrote the following letter to the

intensive care unit staff of CHA Cambridge Hospital who cared for her and
helped him cope.
As I begin to tell my friends and family about the seven days you treated my
wife, Laura Levis, in what turned out to be the last days of her young life, they
stop me at about the 15th name that I recall. The list includes the doctors,
nurses, respiratory specialists, social workers, even cleaning staff members
who cared for her.
How do you remember any of their names? they ask.
How could I not, I respond.
*Commentary: This shows that nurses and other healthcare professionals have the
power to heal both physically and emotionally. The doctors and nurses obviously left a
lasting impression on DeMarco, which makes me want to do that for someone else.
Every single one of you treated Laura with such professionalism, and
kindness, and dignity as she lay unconscious. When she needed shots, you
apologized that it was going to hurt a little, whether or not she could hear.
When you listened to her heart and lungs through your stethoscopes, and her
gown began to slip, you pulled it up to respectfully cover her. You spread a
blanket, not only when her body temperature needed regulating, but also
when the room was just a little cold, and you thought shed sleep more
comfortably that way.
*Commentary: It stood out to me that even when the patient was unconscious, the
nurses cared for Laura as if she was completely present in the situation. I also find it
surprising that these little deeds were noticed by DeMarco because I feel that a lot of
what nurses do are often overlooked.
You cared so greatly for her parents, helping them climb into the rooms
awkward recliner, fetching them fresh water almost by the hour, and by
answering every one of their medical questions with incredible patience. My
father-in-law, a doctor himself as you learned, felt he was involved in her
care. I cant tell you how important that was to him.

Then, there was how you treated me. How would I have found the strength to
have made it through that week without you?
How many times did you walk into the room to find me sobbing, my head
down, resting on her hand, and quietly go about your task, as if willing
yourselves invisible? How many times did you help me set up the recliner as
close as possible to her bedside, crawling into the mess of wires and tubes
around her bed in order to swing her forward just a few feet?
How many times did you check in on me to see whether I needed anything,
from food to drink, fresh clothes to a hot shower, or to see whether I needed
a better explanation of a medical procedure, or just someone to talk to?
How many times did you hug me and console me when I fell to pieces, or ask
about Lauras life and the person she was, taking the time to look at her
photos or read the things Id written about her? How many times did you
deliver bad news with compassionate words, and sadness in your eyes?
When I needed to use a computer for an emergency email, you made it
happen. When I smuggled in a very special visitor, our tuxedo cat, Cola, for
one final lick of Lauras face, you didnt see a thing.
*Commentary: This proves that nurses not only care for their patients, but they also
make sure the patients family and friends have everything they need as well. I think that
is a crucial part of being a nurse because I know that when a family member is sick or in
the hospital, the rest of my family want to be comforted and loved too. I think the part
about letting the cat in to see Laura one more time was very special. I aspire to help
others like these nurses did in my future career.
And one special evening, you gave me full control to usher into the I.C.U.
more than 50 people in Lauras life, from friends to coworkers to college
alums to family members. It was an outpouring of love that included guitar
playing and opera singing and dancing and new revelations to me about just
how deeply my wife touched people. It was the last great night of our
marriage together, for both of us, and it wouldnt have happened without your
support.

There is another moment actually, a single hour that I will never forget.
On the final day, as we waited for Lauras organ donor surgery, all I wanted
was to be alone with her. But family and friends kept coming to say their
goodbyes, and the clock ticked away. About 4 p.m., finally, everyone had
gone, and I was emotionally and physically exhausted, in need of a nap. So I
asked her nurses, Donna and Jen, if they could help me set up the recliner,
which was so uncomfortable, but all I had, next to Laura again. They had a
better idea.
They asked me to leave the room for a moment, and when I returned, they
had shifted Laura to the right side of her bed, leaving just enough room for
me to crawl in with her one last time. I asked if they could give us one hour
without a single interruption, and they nodded, closing the curtains and the
doors, and shutting off the lights.
*Commentary: I think this is so valuable because this hour is something that DeMarco
will remember for the rest of his life. This meant the world to him to be alone with his
wife and the nurses allowed that to occur. It must be difficult sometimes for nurses to
accomplish what they need to when patients have lots of visitors and family members.
However, I think its rewarding to see that the care nurses give their patients is to help
someone that is loved and who means alot to other people.
I nestled my body against hers. She looked so beautiful, and I told her so,
stroking her hair and face. Pulling her gown down slightly, I kissed her
breasts, and laid my head on her chest, feeling it rise and fall with each
breath, her heartbeat in my ear. It was our last tender moment as a husband
and a wife, and it was more natural and pure and comforting than anything
Ive ever felt. And then I fell asleep.
I will remember that last hour together for the rest of my life. It was a gift
beyond gifts, and I have Donna and Jen to thank for it.
Really, I have all of you to thank for it.
With my eternal gratitude and love,

Peter DeMarco