DZANC Acquisitions Notes

The Lamentations:
Because of my own internal conflict between my love of the style and my confusion over
the actual story itself, and while I know that it is not something we are encouraged to do, I am
going to give this submission a vote of "maybe".
The writing style, though there are errors here and there, is incredibly vivid. The imagery and
descriptions provided are exactly the kind that I as a reader enjoy going through. They make one
feel as though they can see what is happening while their eyes are going over the words. I also
loved the ties between music, time, and meaning that are clearly meant to be some of the
defining elements of the novel's plot. The question of whether or not something means more at
its beginning and how its meaning changes or diminishes with time is a popular topic, I feel,
nowadays, and I appreciate the discussion that the author opens about it.
However, despite the flow and quality of the writing I still found it very difficult to push myself
through the reading sample. To me, the plot was unclear and took a while to finally begin to
make sense. Then, once we shifted into section I, I became confused yet again. Was this meant
to be Act I of the opera, or just going back in time to travel the life of Tristan Love leading up to
his creation of the opera? Is the book meant to be about the opera, or about Tristan Love? What
did the reporter, Niles, have to do with it? Further, what is so special about Niles that he is the
narrator of the entire introduction? Will he return later in the story, or was he only meant to set
the scene? For these reasons, I initially wanted to give the piece an automatic 'no', but after a
second thought really came to question what the proper course of action should be.

The Brutalist:
The author's piece, though vivid and engaging at times, seems to largely fall back on
fiction cliches and simple sentence styles in a way that makes the novel, as a whole,
unfortunately unsuitable for publication. Each time I would get invested in a particularly wellwritten section of prose, my momentum would be brought to a crashing halt by either a
grammatical error, an over- simplified sentence, or even just a confusing or unnecessary bit of
dialogue or description. The characters are all rather typical: Adele is the young woman who is
trying to follow her dream by refusing help from estranged parents, Ash is an overlyphilosophical, robot of a man whose heart is wavering between his original desires and his
desire to give up (the initial phrase that went through my head during the prologue was 'please
stop being so extra; you're not the deepest guy on the planet'), and all of the other characters are
pretty much irrelevant even though they are given personalities and voices of their own. By the
end of the sample section, though I had been interested in the beginning, I was left questioning
whether or not I had any desire to actually continue reading.

An Italian Story:
As one who generally does not enjoy romance novels, I will say that I at the very least had
an open mind upon beginning this piece. Unfortunately, I do not believe that "An Italian Story"
really has any of the qualities that Dzanc is looking for. The sentences are structured very
simply, especially in the beginning, giving the reader's inner voice a very choppy start-and-stop
sound that makes it very difficult to immerse oneself in the story. The plot is very predictable
and there is nothing really innovative about the author's style or story, and it gives off the feeling
that the story is targeted specifically for people (notably women) who are yearning for the past
in the same way that the main character is. In that way the main character is relatable - who
doesn't have someone from their past that they would like to reunite with? - but on the whole
Anna is just not really a person I can see myself becoming attached to. Her emotions and
reactions are realistic, but they are the type of reactions one would think about rather than
actually follow through on. Rather than focusing on her own family and current relationship
struggles, she wholeheartedly returns to her feelings for her ex and sees her marriage as
something that was basically designed to fail. As a reader, I find that there is a distinct difference
between a character who is lost and a character who has given up. Anna, in my opinion, falls in
the latter category, making it very difficult to connect to her or find any connection to her story.

The Ensenada Public Library

Fahrenheit 451, though not a book that I personally enjoyed reading, is one that I feel
has a lot to offer in terms of literary and social discussion. As such, with this novel intending to
be related in concept I dove in with my expectations high and was not disappointed. I will say
that I am a bit worried that the piece could cause some copyright issues, but other than that I
believe The Ensenada Public Library definitely has publication potential. There are some areas
of the text that need some attending to in order to fix some oversimplified sentences and tighten
up some weak passages, but the story is interesting and definitely capable of inducing further
thought and discussion. In particular, I loved the metaphors being drawn between the growth of
digitization in the modern world and the slow disappearance of paper products. The narrative
worked in the metaphor in such a way that it was clearly meant to make the reader think about
their own situation, but not in such a way that the author was stretching his words to make them
fit. More simply, I didn't feel as though a thought were being forced on me. I felt as though I was
hearing someone's opinion in a larger discussion. Furthermore, even after reading the sample
section I was still unsure whose voice to trust - the narrator's, the narrator's boss, or the new
employee - and as someone who is typically able to predict a story's antagonist from the get go I
was especially pleased with the fact that as I read I grew more hesitant in my ability to place
blame rather than more confident. Overall, needs a bit of touching up but a solid start.

Servant of Beauty
Starting off this piece, I was almost positive that I was going to end up with a
vote of 'no'. However, the farther I read and the more thoughts I wrote down, the more I
kept convincing myself that perhaps this story had publication potential. There is
nothing particularly experimental or innovative about the writing style, and I was even
severely put off by several of the passages, but the author's descriptive imagery paints
very vivid pictures that would appear in my minds eye without even having to think
about it. I also couldn't help but find myself becoming interested in the main character,
John. He speaks and acts and thinks in such a way that gives the impression that he is
not 100% neuro-typical, and in this modern era the concept of representation is one that
appeals to me greatly both as a person and as a reader. Though I do not particularly care
for any of the other characters involved besides John and his family, I would have to
admit that I am interested (if not a little frightened, based on the summary) in several of
the aspects of the plot. For these reasons I am voting "Yes" on Servant of Beauty - not
because I believe it is a literary masterpiece, but because I was interested in seeing where
it would go and thus believe someone with a sharper eye than mine should have a look at
it.

Miracle
"The Brilliance of Miracles", while an elegant title with an intriguing summary, does not
contain what I believe Dzanc is looking for in a publication. I didn't really understand why the
story started off with WWII, and I also found the use of German at random points throughout
the narrative to be quite unappealing. It takes the reader's attention away ever so slightly, and is
in my opinion unnecessary even you are writing in English for an English audience. An
alternative would have been to have the spoken bits entirely in German with parenthetical
translations following, or to just have no German at all. The sentence structure is largely very
simplified throughout the piece, leaving not much room for an experimental or creative style.
When the author does attempt to be more outgoing with their use of language, the end result is
often overbearing (such as the opening passage of the pregnant planes). The idea behind the
story is interesting and I believe it could be stylistically re-worked to create a work that would fit
Dzanc's interests more, but as of now I have to give this story a vote of no.

Though We Have No Merits

While I enjoyed reading this piece, I don't see it as being one that truly meets what
Dzanc is looking for. I related personally to the main character which got is me invested in
the story, but even with that connection I had a hard time following along with what was
happening during book two. Clearly Zolly is in trouble wiht the authorities, but the various
reasons, to me, were all jumbled together which made his troubles difficult to follow. The
style of the writing is decent and without error, but there isn't a particular spark to it that
would make me want to continue reading if I hadn't connected with Zolly and his girlfriend
Faith. Essentially the plot is too slow in its startup for me to see the narrative as being
eligible for publication on a larger scale despite my personal feelings.

Object/Replacement/Character
The voice, style, and formatting of this piece all come together to make it one that I truly
believe will be an excellent addition to Dzanc's publication list. It can be very difficult to
effectively write a narrative with a first-person point of view, but the author handled the task
excellently and was even able to switch the narrators back and forth without any confusion
on behalf of the reader. Each character is believable and relatable, and speaks with a modern
voice that makes them even more real. The plot is easy to follow and interesting, and the
author comments on a number of issues such as love, starting over, and the death of a family
member in such a way that it forces the reader to see multiple points of view rather than just
their gut instinct. All in all, a wonderful piece in my opinion.

Wait Here
To be honest, when I read that this piece was supposed to be written in a style similar to
that of David Mitchell's "Cloud Atlas" my expectations rocketed sky high. Cloud Atlas is one of
my two favorite novels, and I don't take comparisons to it lightly. The writing style of "Wait
Here" is fluid and clean, but still there were noticeable errors that came across as unintentional
even considering the voice of the second section. However, I did thoroughly enjoy the first
section even though it was much less involved than the second. I think it would be a really close
call as to whether or not this piece has publication potential. The concept behind the novel is
interesting, and I wasn't particularly bored while reading it, but I didn't feel especially compelled
to keep reading either. That being said, I distinctly recall feeling the exact same way about
Cloud Atlas when I first began reading it - with even more animosity seeing as I couldn't
understand the narrative voice of the first section - and it ended up being one of my favorite
books. The idea of everyday lives being inextricably connected in such a large city as Los Angelos
is one that is picturesque but also fascinating to me, because technically what is stopping that
from actually being true? I am voting yes for this novel despite its slight errors in formatting
because I feel that this type of narrative is going to become very important in forthcoming
studies of literature and I believe that while it needs some work "Wait Here" has what it takes to
become a known name amongst literary circles.

Everything/All
Even though I do not personally like this piece, I am giving it a vote of 'yes'. The
style is fresh and the story has multiple plotlines interacting at once. The characters are
interesting and I enjoyed learning more about them as I read further, but for some
reason I really couldn't find the spark that the other readers of the submission picked up
on. However, the imagery of the piece is vivid and, while I don't like the story in and of
itself, I love the way in which it was written. It is the strength of the writing that is getting
this piece a passing grade from me, but nothing more.

WRECKED
I think this piece is incredibly stylistic and innovative in nature, and while it
definitely needs some tightening up in some areas it should be given a chance at
publication. Second-person narration is really interesting in that it is very rarely used
and even more rarely used well. I like the fact that the piece was originally meant to be a
collection of short stories that loosely tie together, and I believe that it is the type of
experimental novel that would be fascinating to study in a classroom setting. The plot is
hard to follow at times and there were several instances where I couldnt for sure say who
was saying what, but those are aspects that I believe could be ironed out during the
editing process.

No River to Cross
Though I didn't like this piece at first, I really came to admire how well the author
managed to switch the perspectives between the characters. I also loved how he
successfully utilized multiple languages - this is something that trips up a lot of writers
and in a personal pet peeve of mine. The narrative is interesting and the style of the piece
is strongly put together, so I see no reason why it should not have a chance at
publication.

A Most Attractive Couple

The title of this submission is what first concerned me upon beginning my reading.
Dzanc is not a genre publisher, and so I worried that this story, clearly a member of the
romance genre, would not make the cut. The characters are, for the most part, likeable,
and the story is well-written, but the plot is unfortunately just as predictable as I feared.
The piece is a good read but is, in my opinion, bare-boned. It takes more that a good
handle on the English language to be able to write a good novel, especially in the style
that Dzanc is looking for. Sadly, I am going to have to give this piece a 'no'.

The world does not know

The imagery presented in this submission is absolutely astounding. I could clearly and
vividly visualize the characters and their surroundings as well as feel the various
emotions that they were going through. Despite this quality of being able to initiate
emotions within myself - most notably fear and suspense in the scene where Vimal is
blindly searching for his brother next to the waterfall - I do not believe this piece has the
potential to be published by Dzanc. The author's knowledge of the Sri Lankan culture
and environment are apparent, but they do not translate well to the structure that they
are attempting to organize this novel with. Instead of being innovative or experimental in
style, the author attempted to incorporate the character's lesser knowledge of English by

manipulating the proper structure of an English sentence. I have seen any number of
authors use this method and every single time I find myself thinking that it just disrupts
the flow of the story rather than adding to the characters. Essentially, the writing is
strong but the story lacked the spark or style that I have found in pieces that I have said
deserve to be published.

Truckstop Troubadors
I appreciate the tone and style of the novel as it is a point of view I am incapable of
having myself. Its raw and I like that because it forces me to look at the world in a
different way, even if I dont like the way I feel reading it. I feel like there is definitely a
commentary being made here, even if it is one that isnt being made on my personal
behalf. I would love to have the chance to sit and read the entirety of the novel and have
an in-depth discussion about it. However, I have a real issue with the fact that the author
submitted a presumably incomplete manuscript judging on the track-changes-esque
comments visible on the right side. I am giving this piece a maybe because I think it
deserves a chance, but I also would like to know the opinion of someone with more
experience than me in a situation like this, would I usually follow my gut instinct and
turn down the manuscript immediately, or should I give it a fair shake based on
content?

The City Beneath Us

I love the feeling of suspense that flows throughout the narrative even though nothing
particularly bad is happening. Especially the last sentence of the first chapter: how on
earth could helping to save one person lead to the deaths of half a family? Though the
plot is slow at first I am very interested in both Adelaide and in Barbara, the storys
narrator. The story is presented through the eyes of a child that seems wise beyond her
years, wise enough that she does not openly express this fact to others. I also appreciate
the incorporation of a second language into the text something that is much more often
than not handled incredibly poorly. However, despite all of these positive aspects, I
cannot readily identify anything particularly notable or innovative about the handling of
the novel. It managed to keep my attention and there are no overarching flaws in the
writing, but was also nothing driving me to continue reading past the sample section. For
this reason, I am going to have to give this submission a no.

Short Story Notes

We Were Bohemian
Ironically, the writing style of this collection gives the piece a very bohemian
vibe. However, the style seems almost forced, as though the writer, while trying to make
their characters fit in to a certain lifestyle, took every bohemian thing she could think of
and laced them into each story. The characters, to me, dont feel real or relatable, they
are simply stand-in representations of a particular lifestyle and way of thinking. The
authors skill is apparent, especially in their descriptive writing, but I do not in any way
feel compelled to read more of their work. As a result, I have to give this collection a no
for the purposes of this competition.
30 Days Dirty
While the title initially had me intrigued, the stories inside the collection failed to
maintain my interest. The plots of the two stories I sampled were both incredibly hard to
follow, but not in any sort of innovative way. The characters were not relatable and their
actions did not seem to come from any rational place. As a reader who usually sides with
the antagonist and can see from their point of view, I could not find myself connecting to
or following the antagonistsor protagonistsat all. I couldnt place myself inside the
story and I couldnt picture what was going on because the plots were so all over the
place, and so Im going to have to give this piece a no.
Unrequited Loves
The characters in the stories of this collection are diverse and interesting in their own
ways. While I cannot find myself relating to all of them, I cannot deny the fact that each
one feels supremely real. Whether I agree with their beliefs and actions or not, the
characters of Mr. Peis stories kept me involved and wanting to know more throughout
the sections that I chose to sample. The stories themselves made me feel a variety of
emotions, but in the way that good writing is supposed to. I was moved by these stories
even when I despised the choices being made within them, and it is for that spark of life
that I found in this collection that I am giving it a yes.
Disease of Kings
While I find the subject matter of this collection fascinating, I cannot for certain say that
it has the potential to be published. The stories, while written well, have no real force behind
them, and are in the end forgettable. I felt for the characters and truly was able to picture the
scenes as they played out, but I do not feel as though this collection is one that represents the
type of literature that Dzanc is looking for.
I Was Born a Werewolfs Child
While the contents of this collection are interesting to say the least, I cannot recommend
it for publication at this time. The characters remain static for the most part, especially within
the first story. I was intrigued by the idea of the first storys haunted skull, and I even felt
genuine fear as I felt the climax of the plot getting closer. (To be fair, Im a coward, so the fact
that I was scared while reading a story reminiscent of a campfire tale does not say much for the
author.) However, at the end of the story there was no climax. Nothing was resolved, the
audience got no answers, and the characters remained just as stiff as they were in the very

beginning. The other narrative that I read from this submission carried the same feeling of being
unnecessarily confusing. There is a difference between experimental literature, creative writing,
and just smashing words together for the fun of it. Unfortunately, it is my opinion that this
collection falls into this latter category.
An archeology of holes
It feels as though the author is attempting to reach the reader solely through shock
factor, not through the desired spark that Ive been looking for in these submissions. The
writing, grammatically, is perfect, and the imagery provided suggests a great deal of skill.
However, it is my opinion that the author would rather frighten the reader than reach them in a
deeper way. If feels as though the stories are meant to be so surprising that it encourages you to
read on and find out what other surprises are in store, but in effect I was just incredibly turned
off to the whole collection. I read multiple stories with each one becoming slightly more
alarming than the last, and rather than making me interested it made me want to forget that I
had ever read it. I didnt feel as though there was a message that I was missing or that there was
even a message at all. However, despite my personal beliefs I do feel that this is the type of
fiction that Dzanc is looking for. The concepts that the stories deal with encourage discussion if
not answers, and the eccentric ideas of the collection are certainly not one that would be
considered mainstream. As such, I am going to have to give this collection a vote of yes, even
though I feel it is important to state that I am highly concerned about the collections
publishability.
Riverea Red
In regards to the technical skill of this collection, it is excellent. There were no overt
grammar or syntax errors, the narrative was painted beautifully, and each character was created
to be their own unique being. However, technical skill does not guarantee a story publication. To
me, there was no real spark behind the words. I had already forgotten most of the first story I
read by the time I was halfway through with the second. Even as I type this review I feel myself
forgetting the rest of what I have read. The writing is well done, but it is nothing special. For this
reason I regrettably have to give this submission a no.
About Love
Before anything else, I am going to say that I give this collection a resounding yes. Yes
because I love the subject matter, yes because of the authors ability to seamlessly write from
different perspectives, and yes because I just genuinely enjoyed reading these stories. The first
story details all the crazy emotions that one experiences when you lose a loved one. The story
How to Leave shows the reader that sometimes one just falls out of love, and that sucks, but
that it happens and its okay when it does. This collection broaches a topic that many people
today seem to want to avoid: love isnt something thats black and white, its a whole color
spectrum, and I believe that the authors stories truly enable the reader to begin to notice and
accept this fact for themselves.

Acapulco 214
When I read the first story of this collection, I honestly didnt think I would end
up liking it. The introductory paragraphs are overflowing with flowery language, and it
just gave off the vibe that the author was trying to force a scene and a feeling onto the
audience rather than letting the feeling come inherently from the words. However, as I
read on I found that I really did like the style of the writing, and the content grew on me
as well. This short story collection brings to the table a hotel room that has seen
countless lives pass through it; that has seen moments both happy and sad and
continued standing with no opinion on either. People are constantly moving in an
intricate, ever-moving web, and I feel that this collection displays this concept
beautifully.
Almost Best
To start off, I really love the points of view that this collection presents. Many AsianAmericans are overlooked, their experiences negated, when it comes to modern life and
literature. I greatly enjoyed reading these stories and learning about the Japanese-American
culture that I will never be able to personally experience. That being said, I must sadly say that I
dont believe this collection has what Dzanc is looking for. The writing was bland for the most
part, and I probably would have found it boring had I not had an interest in other cultures. The
stories of the collection paint very clear, day-by-day lifestyles of a number of different people
and families, but there was nothing about those portraits that made them particularly
memorable. I definitely think that the collection is well-done and should be applauded, but
Dzanc isnt the right publisher to take on the project.
An Ascent and Other Stories
Out of all the short story collections that I read for this contest, this submission would be
my favorite. The writing is gripping and emotional, and I find have found myself thinking about
the first story, Habeas Corpus, at least once a day since I read it a little over two weeks ago.
The stories tackle some difficult subject matter in a very blunt way, but even when I wanted to
avert my eyes and thoughts I couldnt because I was so engaged in the story that I couldnt stop.
This phenomenon was particularly noticeable for the first story, because throughout the
passages about the corpses and how they were dealt with I constantly wanted to leave and do
something else, but there was just something so compellingly gross about the story that I had to
make myself continue. The writing style, subject matter, and general vibe of the collection make
me feel that An Ascent and Other Stories is a perfect fit for Dzanc.
Bad Things
Unfortunately, I have to give this collection a no. The first story of the collection seemed
incredibly bland and typical. What American housewife doesnt wish to run away? Its the plot of
almost every Hallmark channel movie I can think of. The characters themselves were dry, and I
felt that I could place them in any other Nicholas Sparks book and no one would even know the
difference. The technical skill of the author is apparent, and I am not afraid to admit that I did
feel minor suspense if not interest while reading these stories, but there is no spark behind the
writing. As for the namesake story of the collection, Bad Things, I just honestly didnt like the
main character. There is nothing interesting about her, and the way she drops someone she
supposedly loves just because he is into cross-dressing seems incredibly unfair and

unreasonable. The whole cross-dressing element was a plot twist thrown in for the sake of
surprising readers, it had no basis in the rest of the story and, personally, I didnt een think it
was that big of a deal. As a result of all of these factors, I have to discourage Dzanc from
publishing or awarding this collection.