THE STRUGGLE TO LOVE

To God who has become human -

the most perfect expression of Love

God is Love
To find Love is to find God

O Love, you bring about my ec-stasy

where you spring open wide the gates of my soul
allowing my whole being
to fly out breathing a new air of freedom

O Love, I risk flying out exposing my true self

to the one for whom I yearn and desire
knowing full well that I risk
not being loved in return

O Love, as I stand out of myself, I see

an expansion of my personality
the transformation of my human existence
since You freely give me a fresh vision and
a new perception of life

O Love, you cause my whole being to overflow

out of the rigid boundaries
of narrowness and self-certitude
which make me a prisoner to myself
in my own squalor and emptiness

O Love, touched by You, I can no longer walk alone

but only with the object of my Love
to meet You
who has given me this awesome and sacred
gift of Love

O God, surely this miracle and adventure of Yours is

as wonderful and unique as the mystics
knowledge of You, my loving God!

Sydney
26-xii-96

1
TO SPYRO

We know that all things work together for good

for those who love God
Romans

God blesses "some" with

strength, wisdom, brilliance....
But "others" whose simplicity of heart
and radical openness to the source of Life
God takes special care
and allows them to carry
an unthinkable cross
So that in being broken
He may then fully embrace them
in His limitless and ecstatic LOVE.

But how can I say all this to you Spyro

as you cry and grapple with this truth
trying to make sense of the insensible.

Redfern
4-viii-98

2
MARRIAGE

The beginning of an untried promise

leading to decisive action
and
entailing the joyful commitment
of our whole being.

Redfern
23-vii-98

3
THE FEAST OF ST PHILIP

A tribute to my late grandfather Philip

I tell you, it's a paradox,

when you go to the cemetery
where apparently the world
makes you believe
that they are dead.

But I know that this is not the case

because in the Liturgy
on St Philip's day
I felt the presence of my grandfather
more intensely
standing beside me
praying together
thus transcending the division
between the living and the departed.

Strathfield
14-xi-98

4
HOPE

Hope - the most important

element in our Christian faith
Bishop Gerasimos of Abydos

Like love and faith

Hope too is a gift
given to us by God.

Why is it that we dare

to live without
this gift of hope
which provides us
with consolation and courage
in the struggles of life
making real realities not yet seen, felt
or even dreamt of
and which gives this soul
that which it truly desires
- an abundant overflowing into our hearts
of heavenly blessings
in a loving communion
with God and one another.

Redfern
14-xii-98

5
LET GLORY BE GIVEN TO GOD FOR EVERYTHING

Dovxa tw/' Qew'/ pavntwn e[neken

St John Chrysostom

They would often tell me

that we should do everything
for the glory of God
And for a long time I
struggled to understand this.

Until finally it dawned on me one day

or should I say
revealed to me
from above
that the more I come to
see and feel all around me that
each flower
every water droplet
every singing bird
every little fish swimming in the waves
every friendship experienced
is a gift from God himself

How can I not

but glorify God
and thank Him for
EVERYTHING.

Jervis Bay
12-i-99

6
FROM DEATH TO LIFE - A NEW BEGINNING

Blessed are those who mourn

for they will be comforted
(Matt.5:4)

As dying and behold we live

(2 Cor.6:9)
I feel for you today
as you cry
as you grieve
and as you experience
the painful reality of loss
for indeed the mystery of death is awesome.

But although at moments like this

it would be wise for me to remain silent
simply being there with you
sharing in your pain
I am urged to offer this little bit of hope....
and that is that you do not cry alone:
Jesus too weeps with your today
as He does upon finding out
that his friend has passed away
St Paul appreciates this tragedy and is here to comfort you
with his great words of hope.

The pain perhaps becomes a little bearable

in that we hold firm to the hope
that death is not the end
but only the beginning
the opening of a new door
your grandfather's birthday into Paradise.
You see, his earthly life
is but just the introduction of his book
his life to come the main body.
In dying he now enters the infinite joy of eternity
because even death cannot deprive him
from sharing an all abundant life in God
like a shining star in heaven.

It is for us left behind to mourn him:

but we too get a glimpse of his joy
of his new beginning
as we see the priests
not dressed in black
but in white as they do on the night of Pascha.

Nevertheless I feel it is difficult to share

these truths with you
as I feel you crying
at his funeral.
So all I can do is to assure you that from now
he will talk to you in your prayers
loving you as he did before.
And as you too remember him in this way
His memory will be eternal
Till you meet again.

Sydney, 16-ii-99
The Falling Asleep of Pappou

7
LAUGHTER

They say that laughter is not becoming

of a person of God
But I am not afraid of laughter, joviality
and even a little triviality.
At the right moment, even this triviality
is deeper than a profound thought
since this thought can be the result of spiritual pride
a pride that does not want to come to terms
with its mere humanity.
But I am convinced that there really has to be
a time for laughter
because this opportunity too has been created by God.

Sydney
18-ii-99

8
TO LIVE IS TO LOVE

In gratitude of Fr Simeon

They say that life is

complex and hard
Yet it can be so simple and rather easy.
If only we could come to the realisation
that the only thing we have been put
on earth to do
like our Creator
is simply to LOVE
and love passionately.

And Love is to live without the "I"

to live without the me.
Instead.... to live with the all embracing "o"
to live for the all embracing
o - ther!

But this sweetness of love

has been forgotten
as we have chosen rather
to shut our heart
giving no room for the smile
of the other person
to totally consume our heart
giving no room in our heart to experience
the freedom, the beauty
of the Other.

Why is it that we have hardened

instead of being soft, open
and most of all
vulnerable?

Why is that we have put on an actor's mask

thus estranging ourselves from others
instead of being totally
free and authentic?

Why is it that we have closed up

asphixiating the real self
instead of opening up
and allowing God's
joy, happiness and true consolation
to enter within

A genuine joy which the more it is

shared the more
overflowing and abundant it becomes.

Sydney
13-iii-99

9
TO LIVE IS TO LOVE CONTINUED

And we live this love

either sharing this love
with wife, children, neighbour
in fact the whole created order
Or.... we struggle to transform
this love
to erotic desire for God.
But all this cannot be done by mere humans
but will only happen with
the grace of God.

Sydney
13-iii-99

10
THE REPROACH OF OTHERS

I will be forever grateful to you

since you were able
to awaken my conscience
pointing out this thorn of my soul
in particular my idle talk.

Working through you,

God has been able
to humble me
since that was my petition
to Him in my daily prayers.

And it is for this reason that

I receive and accept your
observation and remark
with pleasure and thanksgiving.

Strathfield
23-iii-99

11
THE BEAUTY OF THE PERSON

How beautiful and unique

human persons are
in their absolute difference
totally astonishing
always surprising
ceaselessly captivating
endlessly spontaneous
loving in freedom, therefore always different.

Why is it that we are now

threatened by the other
not wishing the ec-static experience of being
astonished and surprised
by that which is different in the other?

Why is it that we cannot

love the other
not DESPITE their differences
but BECAUSE of those differences
Since we were created by God
not different from each other
but different for each other.

Strathfield
19-v-99

12
TOLERANCE AND LOVE: A FINE LINE

It is tolerance
and not love
to give yourself to others
always expecting something
in return
even something as
seemingly insignificant
as their glance
or inviting smile
Since love knows NO conditions.

Love is the struggle to live totally

for the other person
wanting nothing in return for yourself
but only their happiness
Whilst fulling knowing that
they may NEVER
love you in return,

Likewise it is tolerance
and not love
when we live our life
fulfilling God's commandments
only because we expect the prize
of His Kingdom in the end.
The quintessential question is
would we live the same life
loving God the way we do
if we did not have the promise
of His kingdom at the end.

Strathfield
19-v-99

13
YOUR EYES

It is true when they say that

the inner world of a person
is reflected in their eyes.

And gazing upon your eyes

all I experience is modesty
all I encounter is purity
all I behold is innocence
all I see is beauty

Your eyes, truly a window

leading me to eternity
a reflection of Beauty divine.

Maroubra
14-viii-99

14
THE GIFT OF TRUE LOVE

At first sight it seems

a justified question
How will you know
which person is the 'other'
destined for you by God
in order to complete you.

But the answer to that

like everything else in life
is given to us from above
in a rather unexpected
and inexpressible manner.

A spark within us
is suddenly ignited
which makes us act
in a way which seems
entirely illogical.
Suddenly you are consumed
by only one desire -
to give yourself,
your heart and
entire being
wholly to the other
therefore dying to yourself
since you have found life in the 'other'.

And this gift of true love

if it is indeed true love
and not just lust and self centred passion
you very quickly come to realise
that it can only come from above
because quite unexpectedly
you find yourself
in a constant state of praise and gratitude
but not to the object of your love
but to the Bestower of the Gift of Love
God who is love.

Strathfield
22-viii-99

15
HUMAN PERSONS - GODLY CREATURES

"for he who does not love his brother whom

he has seen, how can he love God whom he
has not seen…"
(1 John 2.20)

Created in the image and likeness of God

(Gen. 1.26)

God is not an impersonal idea

a philosophical concept
or assumption.

But a personal and loving God

who offers Himself
in love
to ALL creatures.

It follows then, that to find love

by gazing upon another person
is to find God
or rather to be found by Him
Who is Love.

If only we could look into the eyes

of every person
and see there in a transparent way
the love and very face of God
after whose image we have all been created.

Strathfield
23-viii-99

16
THE PARADOX OF LOVE

Some say that marriage kills love

therefore highlighting
the dismal banality of love
seeing it also as joyless and boring.
Surely this is because they see love primarily
as a means for their own gratification
a mere physical and emotional
release
which logically dies and disappears
as soon as it is satisfied.

Unfortunately these people have not understood

that the paradox of love
lies in the fact that
only to the extent that you
principally concern yourself
to give yourself entirely and absolutely
to your beloved other
is the extent that you are
truly fulfilled and gratified
in an unquenchable manner.

Strathfield
23-viii-99

17
OUR SAINTS

They often question us as to how

we can even contemplate
praying to our saints.
But perhaps they have overlooked
our conviction that

In venerating those men and women

who have been made holy by God
we firstly venerate our Loving God
who has made them holy
in the first place.

O how important is it therefore

to form a real and living
loving relationship
with our saints -
those living and those departed.

Redfern
13-x-99

18
BLOWING KISSES

...to find beauty in the ordinary

My morning daily drive

into work
let alone my whole day
could be filled with ordinary
yet limitless miracles
if only I cared to open myself
to that reality.

It was yesterday morning

as I stopped at the red lights
in my car
that I saw a little girl
crossing the road to go to school
and blowing kisses to her mother
something which at first glance
seems quite ordinary and natural

Little did she know however

that her simple yet affectionate gesture
brought a smile to all our faces
occasioned so many beautiful thoughts
made us reflect on the beauty of love....

Petersham
14-x-99

19
ON HOPE AGAIN

Even when life does not seem

happy and joyous
let us live in hope
and eager expectation
because it is only when our days
are overcast and CLOUDY
that we appreciate and live
in hope
that the SUN will once again appear
in all its glory
to warm, comfort and console us.
Because ultimately the person
who has not experienced
the "cold" wintery night of the soul
will not experience
in all fullness
the warmth that
the SON of Loving Tenderness
can radiate and shine out for all.

Strathfield
18-x-99

20
GLUTTONY

A faceless passion
hungering and thirsting
moaning and crying out
to be filled.

But do not be too hard

on the glutton
because even this fallen disposition
of his
can be transformed
quite unknown to him into
an inner hunger
leading him to
"taste and see that the Lord is good"
leading him to
realise rather suddenly that
"His fruit was sweet to his taste".

Strathfield
19-x-99

21
LIFE
- both good times and bad
for the good times taught me to live life and
the bad times taught me how to live life…

It is rather easy to have

an experience of God
in joyful times
when all is going well.

But our struggle in life

is to feel His all abiding Presence
even in our bankruptcy
when we feel totally abandoned.

This will lead to giving glory to God

not only when happy
But also when feeling thirsty
and totally fragmented.

O if only we could be open to

the fullness of life
which includes
-both sad and happy times.

Randwick
28-x-99

22
A THEOLOGIAN

A theologian is one
who reads through
the lines
of material things
and sees reality as
in all its dimensions
that is – as it really is.

A sensitive person therefore

seeing everything in life
as miraculous
Surely a calling for ALL
since this experience of life
in all its fullness
cannot be taught

We just have to be open

as His children
to acknowledge
His all abiding presence
in ALL.

Randwick
28-x-99

23
EUTHANASIA

It is much easier to take

a fundamentalist approach
and affirm an outright
"NO"
to euthanasia.

Is it too dangerous a question to ask

however:
whether it would be better
for a person
suffering in an unbearable manner
to lose several days of life
instead of losing
eternal life
by losing all hope in God?

The answer to that question

is still a mystery to me.
The reason for the question
seeing my beloved grandmother
suffering
And my only prayer to God -
that he take her into
His all comforting embrace -
eu – thanasia
a beautiful-death!

Randwick
28-x-99

24
AGAIN A THEOLOGIAN

One who is open

to God's gentle and loving whispers
realising just how much
we all have received
from Him
and being
grateful for that.

Randwick
28-x-99

25
A POPULAR SAYING RE-EXAMINED

I have often heard it said

"God be with you"
But I fail to understand
the meaning of this
since God is always
with us.
It's another matter however
if WE'RE with God.

Strathfield
29-x-99

26
FRIDAY NIGHT-SUNDAY MORNING

Crowds of people literally bumping

into each other,
all thronging to that one place
all dressed up
under the dim lights
the loud music
where "it's all happening" as they say
the perfect atmosphere
so it seems
for young people to be and do
what is most natural for the human person
to relate and make real contact with other people
since deep within our sub-conscience we all know that
we exist only to the extent that we relate
to others.

Yet this 'spot', so full of people

where there is absolutely no place to move around
for me at least as far as I experienced it
became my crowded solitude -
as my soul, indeed my whole existence
kept on crying out wanting to relate
and make contact with anybody beside me
but.....on an authentic level
beyond the 'small talk'....
yet to no avail.

What a paradox it is that all it takes

for that real moment
of giving and taking
to occur is simply ONE person
-as you take your morning walk
through the park-
to say one quick and passing
"good morning"
to give one impulsive yet authentic
smile
to give one impromptu yet inviting
glance your way

And quite unexpectedly it finally

dawns on you
that your soul's innermost desire to be fulfilled
in relating with others
on an authentic level
can occur not amongst that faceless throng of people
but just with one person
in one fleeting moment
whilst walking through the park.

City-Strathfield
7-xi-99

27
THE PARK

The park is not just an open space

with many trees and open areas
covered in grass
where you go and walk or play

The park is the place

which opens your whole being
to experience life
and life abundantly -

the blue sky of the heavens

above you;
the symphony of music
in the chirping of the birds;
the sweet smelling fragrances
in all the spring flowers
bursting with life;
the morning crisp spring zephyr
passing you by
and tapping your shoulder;
but most of all ....

the little white butterflies

all flying upwards in the sky
against the perfect endless backdrop
of the beautiful blue sky
reminding you of little white "angels"
going home
having spent the night protecting
you and me.

City-Strathfield
7-xi-99

28
THE LANGUAGE OF FLOWERS

If language can be defined

as the means
by which we communicate
to one another

Then surely flowers and in fact

all of the 'flora' and 'fauna' world
speak to us as well...
but not the conventional
means of sound

But by the sweet smelling odour

like that of jasmine
that each effuses out
occasioning within us
so many feelings and thoughts
like that of beautifully balanced sentences
spoken by the mouths of poets
throughout the centuries.

Surfer's Paradise
27-xii-99

29
SUICIDE*

How can I dare to pass moral judgement

on the person afflicted
with the most terrible of all temptations -
- to willfully take this sacred gift of life
by committing suicide!

When deep within I know

that we too as a community are to blame
since we have failed
to take seriously the commitment
not to abandon one another
in this our most true time of need and reaching out.

If only we could have been

more strongly committed
more caringly compassionate
and most important more outwardly loving
taking even so slightly away from you
the crushing burden that you were suffering.

Yet we live though this tragedy

with the firm conviction
that the saving love of Christ
is infinitely stronger
than this self-inflicted death
and our lack of responsibility on your part
oh beloved brother in Christ.

Sydney Airport
27-i-2000

*a special thanks to Pandelis and Eleni who were the first to make me seriously reflect on this
important issue concerning so many persons of our community tempted with suicide.

30
THE EVENING SONG

All alone as I lay me down to sleep

in the total darkness of the night
I am not afraid of
the outside blackness
Because I am comforted and consoled
as I look beyond
my bedroom window
not having to experience the hustle and bustle
of the busy day
where one can quite easily feel a crowded solitude

But instead, I am immersed in

the deep and dark blue sky
lit up the countless stars
and the tops of several tree branches
with their many leaves
all pointing in an upward direction towards the sky.

So all I can now do is simply

plunge myself completely in this
harmonious symphony of praise
to you o God
making me feel a sense
of belonging and togetherness
with the rest of the world
even in this my apparent
loneliness and desolation.

Strathfield
12-ii-00

31
TRIUMPH IN LONLINESS

As I lie down in my room all alone

once again
my whole being cries out
craving to feel a sense of belonging
longing to be embraced
yearning to selflessly love and
be loved
and all this.... just so that it can feel whole
and complete
because this is simply how we were created

But, in this dreaded and bitter loneliness

which I suffer
I feel and am comforted by only one thing

That I could not bear and withstand

this unbearable pain
of loneliness
had it not been that You
were here in my pain
constantly with me
ever comforting me
always encouraging me
for ever loving me
for who I am
So I am left to feel even through
this trial of bitter solitude
That I am not alone even in my loneliness
That there can be triumph even in loneliness.

Kogarah
2-ii-00

32
DISCOVERY IN LOSS

It is really a great paradox

dare I say mystery
that we come to experience 'love'
only in the distance of failure
because before failure there is no experience
of the sweet taste of Paradise lost

So we venture out again

taking the painful risk
to love
because we desire only one thing:
that we may be filled once again
by the blossom of Paradise gained.

Strathfield
1-iii-00

33
LOVE RECIPROCATED

Oh I can only imagine that with

the first sign of mutuality
and love reciprocated
must come the most drunken taste
of the fullness of life -
the whole world being offered to me
in the glance and smile of the other

Strathfield
1-iii-00

34
UPROOTING

God calls us like Abraham

to radically uproot ourselves
not because He wishes that we reject our past
but so that we can become broader
giving Him room to come within us
and therefore being liberated to fly with the wings
that God gives us.
Because in uprooting ourselves we are not led
to nothingness
but are taken rather into God's loving embrace..

Strathfield
1-iii-00

35
LOOKING FOWARD IN THE PAST

Have you noticed that the two words

"successor" and "successful"
derive from the same root.
Could this means that in order
to become success-ful we have to be in success-ion
with those who have gone before us
Only to the extent that we are deeply rooted in the past
can we withstand all that the adventure
of the future may bring us.

Strathfield
1-iii-00

36
TO PETER AND SOPHIA

Looking upwards in the sky

on this cold, wintery night
I can not help but be taken back
with wonder and awe
at the heavenly celestial celebration
which is taking place up there
quite unperceived by us
down here:

Take a moment and focus your glance upwards

and you will see
The countless clouds
all clothed
in ever so slightly different
shades of grey
making their way with such elegance
through the sky,
the branches of the trees
together with the leaves
that cover them
swaying to the sound of the wind.

They are inviting you,

o Peter and Sophia
to come and share in their joy
in seeing you begin your journey upwards
to glorify the God
not only of human persons
but the whole of creation.

Strathfield
5-iv-00

37
AN AWKWARD FRIENDSHIP – I THINK NOT

Truly I am grateful and thankful

that our paths continually seem to cross
even though I must admit that at first
the question as to why this is so
did spring up in my thoughts
since those outside our unique yet beautiful
friendship
did seem to think that it must be awkward
and a little strange –
not to say a little painful
as though you purposefully
would want to hurt me.

But alas, that is not the truth

- it cannot be so,
even though from a purely human perspective
it may seem the case.

Surely God has brought you again into my life

to reveal to me one of His greatest gifts
bestowed on all the world
without discretion…
that of a godly friendship
- a giving without asking for anything more in return.

My only hope is to be able to reflect

even if only in a very small way
that heavenly gift which I have received from you
acting as a little window
for you to "just know" a little more clearly
of the beauty of life and love
in all its fullness and
in all its dimensions.
For true friendship makes the whole world
shine just that little brighter
on those that it has touched.

Strathfield
15-iv-00

38
CLOTHED IN GENTLENESS

Blessed are the meek for they will inherit the earth
(Matthew)

It is often said by our tough and unbending society

that gentleness is a weakness
something to be overcome
thereby encouraging us instead to be
direct and forthright.

On the contrary, I must point out

that is not the case.
For gentleness is to keep the wavering light
of a candle wick alive
even in the midst of the various storms of life
thereby treading ever so lightly and carefully
being attentive to every detail and every need
of the "other"
Thus choosing to enjoy the company of all those around us
instead of seeing what can be gained.

Strathfield
15-iv-00

39
DOXO - LOGY

What is the word of God?

It is not simply the texts that
the evangelists or
apostles have left behind
in their divinely inspired writings.

Rather the Logos of God

is God Himself
who has totally revealed Himself to us
out of his inexpressible love
and now indwells in us
putting our conscience
alight with fire
and making our whole being
To give glory to the Logos -
that is DOXO-LOGY.

Redfern
10-v-00

40
TRUE FRIENDSHIP-TRUE LOVE

What a difficult reality true friendship is

where you go against the norms
of today's society
which dictate
'taking' from another person
so that your needs alone may be fulfilled.
Instead true friendship prescribes
serving the 'other' first
before you satisfying yourself
and your wants.

What can one say of true love,

which implies not only being attentive to the needs
of the 'other' before your own
which is what friendship is all about
but quite contrary to logic
giving yourself entirely to the another person
thereby
losing yourself in the deep abyss of that person
and
surrendering your every thought and very existence
to your beloved other -
surely an unheard mystery only of a Trinitarian God
which we are blessed to experience.

Strathfield
25-v-00

41
SUFFERING LOVE

O God you love me

without any conditions
like a man madly in love with his beloved
always there for me
even though I often ignore your all abiding presence
always there for me
and all others
making me feel secure in the warm embrace
of your all comforting presence
like that of a mother
towards her new born child
always there for me
and all others
even though I act as though I have no need
of your caring tenderness.

O God as I venture to emulate this

God-given mystery of love
and experience the pain of
love unreciprocated
all I am led to imagine
if only as far as is humanely possible
is the extent of your suffering
as you love us
who are impartial and indifferent.
However I dare to take the less travelled road
to love and therefore suffer
Since I know that you O God
have gone before me in this.

Strathfield
26-v-00

42
SUNDAY ORTHROS

What ecstatic joy I experienced today

as I ventured out
on this crisp and cold
Sunday morning
where the sun had only just begun to rise
and once again offer in a miraculous way
its warm rays of sunlight
on all the world without discretion.

Whilst in Church that morning

with only the priest and my fellow chanter
I could not but bring to mind
and share in the indescribable joy
of the myrrh bearing women
who ventured out to meet the Risen Lord
on that Sunday morning and sing
like we do too
at every Orthros service:
"He is God, He is Lord and He appeared unto us
Blessed is He who comes in the name of the Lord".

Strathfield
28-v-00

43
DISCERNING VOCATION

Is it too daring a thought to imagine

that the sinlessness of our Lord Jesus
would be of no significance to me
had our Saviour not had
the real possibility at least
to fall into sin
even though He did not.
Herein lies for His real commitment to save me.

Isn't this a little like our commitment

to our vocation in life
as well:

It isn't so much not being able

to see ourselves doing something
else that counts.
Rather it is waking up day after day
and freely choosing
again and again
to commit ourselves
to this our sacred vocation
beyond the temptation
to do otherwise.

Surely this is the liberating experience

that gives this aspect of your life
its true meaning and purpose.

Strathfield
10-vi-00

44
TO KALIOPE

Truly your name which literally means

"a beautiful face"
does you justice for in your countenance
one beholds beauty indeed
just like our all-loving God
intended it
since you have not allowed it to be blurred
by masking it with falsity.

So immersed in the pure sublimity of your gaze

I experience your sponge-like zeal
for truth as it really is
and not the inhibiting rules of
a so called morality
I stand before an innocence and openness
written only upon the face of children
who see the miracle in all of life
And I marvel at your modesty and gentleness
which surely come about
only with maturity -
something which you also possess.

So all we, your friends can simply do is

give thanks and glory
for the undeserved blessings given us
from above
to behold the little bits of heaven
reflected in a most brilliant and radiant way
in your "beautiful face"
thereby leading us in a most direct way
to the very beautiful
countenance of God Himself.

Stanwell Tops
9-vii-00

45
CONFUSION

Confusion should not be seen

in a negative way
as we may often tend to do so
considering it to be
an unnecessary perplexity or
an embarrassing obscurity.

Rather con-fusion, as the word suggests

can be an opportunity or
a knocking at our door
given to us from up above
to fuse together or co-fuse our thoughts.

Let us seize this chance and

respond in freedom
to our current state of dispersed existence
and bring together these our scattered thoughts
in an unseparable way
becoming 'whole'
thereby emulating the wholiness of our Creator.

Strathfield
29-vii-00

46
SYM-PATHY

Until now, sympathy was simply a virtue

or at least a feeling
not yet experienced by me
even though I knew that
it ought to characterise my disposition
towards another human being -
that is to co-suffer, or to sym-pathise
for the 'other'.

But that was all until my encounter

with you
when quite strangely I felt that
nothing would give me more pleasure
at this point in my life
than to see you happy -
at whatever the cost
therefore seeing you unhappy made me feel
the same as well.

Now, behold, the paradox, I find myself hurting

not so much for what I am currently feeling
but for the fact that I see you
in a state of 'confusion'
and am helpless
to do anything about it
to shed some light even if a little
so all I do is suffer together with you
- that is… feel 'sym-pathy'
until I see in your eyes that happiness
radiating out once again.

Strathfield
29-vii-00

47
ODE TO SLEEP

Sleep, contrary to what many may think

is not simply that time
of the day
when you go to rest your body from
the adventure of the day.

Rather, sleep is yet another blessing

given to us from up above
where we are given the opportunity
in our dreams
to revisit those picturesque places once again
seeing in a most vivid way
the crystal waters
caressing and cooling the dry rock beds
which have valiantly stood firm
providing a solid ground
for us to enjoy nature's beauty
to delight in the setting of the sun
with its beautiful array of sombre colours
filling the sky in such a festive way
to even listen to the rhythm of the wind
setting in motion the evening joyful hymn
of the trees' leaves
and most importantly
to continue the beautiful friendships experienced
earlier in the day
in this backdrop of beauty.

O my dreams, my only comfort

when I am all alone in my bed
hoping that these overflowing gifts given
in such a generous and unprejudiced way
during the full light of the day
will enraptured repeat
during this our great adventure of sleep.

Nielson's Park
14-ix-00

48
MAN AND HIS NARCISSISM

O but what a fool man is

who thinks that he alone is whole
within himself
self-absorbed and self-seeking
without the need of another
wholly immersed in his own narcissism.

A truly wise man is rather

one who seeks passionately
day and night
risking all
even his very own existence
because ultimately he knows
that he will be made whole and fulfilled
only by another woman
since God created humanity
in His image and likeness
male AND female created He them.

Only together, man and woman

express the image of God
within us
something that we strive to realise
in our lives everyday
and through this human-divine eros
we learn to love not only
another person
but to be in love with the whole human race
and creation in general.

Vaucluse
21-ix-00

49
WOMAN – AN ILLOGICAL BEING!?!

I have often heard it said

in jest of course
that women are illogical beings
and I agree with this
most definitely
because in a male dominated society
such is ours
which continually fights
to dominate and destroy the world
in order to assert himself
over the other
it would seem most ‘logical’ for woman
to assimilate in order to survive.

But alas… no this is not the case

because in a society such as ours
the presence of the woman becomes
most radiantly felt
not through her activity
but in that she continues to abandon herself
sacrifice everything
even her very life
for the harmony and peace of all,
but isn’t this the ineffable meaning of love?
It is true that some may call her ‘illogical’
others however may freely choose
to perceive through her,
the very essence of love
God who is love.

Vaucluse
21-ix-00

50
CRAMMED WITH HEAVEN

"the world in every grain of sand"

William Blake

Why is it that we have ended up

with a mentality which dictates
using and abusing nature all around us?

Arise o man from moral deadness,

rekindle the divine sparkle
within
and enjoy every detail in this world
around you
as ineffably rare
delightful and
beautiful.
since all this world is literally crammed with heaven
if only we were to open our inward looking eyes
to see this heavenly celebration
of gracefulness and splendour.

Vaucluse
21-ix-00

51
ENTIRELY OTHERNESS

If only we really appreciated

the uniqueness and the entirely otherness
of every person
only then we would learn not
to inhibit their god-given freedom
but to respect absolutely that which is different
in all persons.

Vaucluse
21-ix-00

52
LOVELESS SOCIETY

"The man who does not love is still in

the realm of death"
I Jn 3.15

Perhaps we cannot truly love

because we instinctively fear
giving up our 'egos'
not wanting to 'lose' anything
in order to participate in the mystery
of the other person.
So we go about living
what we think is a 'happy' life
dare I say 'lie'
shut behind the gate of our personal prison.

Vaucluse
22-ix-00

53
A TRUE LOVE

A love without reason

and purpose
except to help the 'other' see
through your eyes
the presence of beauty and magnificence
everywhere.

Vaucluse
22-ix-00

54
MORALITY

It is not something which deals with

sexual promiscuity.
Rather it is every person's calling
in freedom
to become authentically what God
created them to be.

Morality says, be exposed

come out of your hiding
do not pretend
but allow another to experience
who you really are
in all your brilliance and squalor.

Vaucluse
22-ix-00

55
THANK YOU LORD

…. for the miracle of a true encounter

…. for the blessing that comes upon two people
making them ONE
…. for the gift of unity which makes two unique people
inseparable for ever
in the mystery of eternal Love
…. that you love us without any limits -
with all your life and
with all your death

O my Joy, my Happiness, my Love

…. Thank you.

Redfern
23-ix-00

56
PANAYOTI'S VISION

"though thousands of Archangels and

myriads of angels… the Cherubim
and the Seraphim…soaring aloft on their wings"

Why is it that only the innocent

and pure children
who are literally overflowing with
all the benefits from above
without having lost sight of this
can naturally behold this angelic vision given to all of us
at every divine liturgy.

I thank my nephew Panayoti for sharing

this vision with me
as he was looking up
whilst I was holding him during a liturgy
one Saturday night
since I the 'theologian' and 'enlightened' one
had become indifferent
to such a miraculous sight.

23-ix-00
Redfern

57
HUMBLE COUNSEL

Better a person who sometimes fights with God

other times loves Him
but never loses sight of his
all abiding presence.

Vaucluse
25-ix-00

58
OUR HUMAN PREDICAMENT

We are all just feeble human beings

where our beauty lies not
in our 'sophistication' or intellectual capabilities
since this would be to idealise ourselves
and mask our true human predicament.

Rather we all have both good and bad traits

within us
and are ultimately saved by grace
and not by merit.
Blessed is the person who discerns this as he will
not only accept himself
but others around him
for who they really are.

Vaucluse
26-ix-00

59
INTIMACY AND FULFILMENT

Intimacy and fulfilment

is what every person
irrespective of age, gender or race
seeks for in a relationship.

How is it that we desire to love passionately

one other person
but at the same time believe that
we are free to pick and choose
other 'enticing' goodies
along the way.

Perhaps we must learn again that

this profound experience
of intimacy and fulfilment
can only be found by committing ourselves to this
our other half
who is our soul mate.

Vaucluse
27-ix-00

60
SHEER BLISS

Oh what festal bliss whilst driving

through Forster
one evening and beholding
a deep yet blue sky
total darkness
except for the presence of the moon up above
and a festal celebration of stars
literally flooding the sky with
such bright light
inviting us to lose ourselves in that
celebration of splendour
and acute ineffable joy.

Vaucluse
1-x-2000

61
TRUE MEANING

To fill every moment in life

with LIFE
experiencing the eternal
in those every precious moments
thereby living the dawn of this new reality
here and now
and not only in the world to come
and you know that this is happening
when quite suddenly everything becomes
full of joy, happiness and sheer bliss

Strathfield
5-x-2000

62
MY GROWING ALLERGY

In my short yet eventful life

I can honestly and boldly say that
I am happy
but at the same time a little discouraged
becoming quite allergic
to all the falsities and mask-wearing
all around me.

Why is it that we do not offer

all those around us that which is
most precious and totally unrepeatable
- our true self
as God intended it?

Paddington
6-x-2000

63
A 'GOOD' PERSON

It is true that you can be a

'good' person
but never go to Church and
not even believe in God.

But without God all this 'goodness'

is frightfully boring and
dare I say somewhat amiss!

Paddington
6-x-2000

64
INEBRIATED WITH LIFE

Live!
Simply live life
experience all that it has to offer
both the joyous and happy moments
but also the difficulties and challenges
that it may present
and do not try to define this life
or explain it with words
as no word can adequately capture
the presence and mystery
of eternity
in life's every moments
Absolute Joy!

Strathfield
7-x-2000

65
A WALK THROUGH THE BEACH

Walking along the sand of the ocean beach

watching the waves break
as they make their way towards the shore
comforting all without discretion
and feeling the miracle of the winds
refreshing all those
who have travelled from afar
I feel a jolt of happiness and peace
at the vision I behold before my very eyes -
the breath of spiritual Presence all around me
- a breakthrough of the eternal.

Coff's Harbour
21-x-2000

66
CONCERN FOR ELENI

Bored and sometimes even afraid of time

and its endless seeming repetition and limitedness
some people will endeavour
to liberate themselves from
the curse of time
escaping into spiritual exercises such as yoga.

But only a 'fool' would strive for

the absolute -
to liberate time itself
emptying it of all its power
and filling its fragments with the eternal.

Coff's Harbour
21-x-2000

67
AUTHENTICITY

Our greatest struggle in life

is to bring together in a harmonious way
our mind, heart and mouth
- that is to express verbally
and to share with others
at all times
those thoughts which occupy our mind
those feelings and even the slightest movements
of our heart -
thereby living in a state of
constant transparency
and reflecting
the authentic image within
which we all have
even if in a shattered state.

Redfern
2-xi-00

68
LOOKING THROUGH YOUR EYES

Relating to another person authentically

that is embracing and immersing ourselves in
their uniqueness and otherness
means to begin on our part
a daring and courageous adventure
of denying ourselves
and choosing rather
to close our eyes in order to dare behold the world
through their eyes.

Yet in looking through the eyes of another person

-since every person is an 'image' of God -
the most beautiful paradox
of all occurs:
we behold the heavens smiling
through their eyes
we see the sun shining ever so bright
beyond the darkness of our worldview
and we encounter paradise in their heart.

Life is only worthwhile to the extent that

we dare to experience it
in all its fullness
through the eyes of another person.

Strathfield
7-xii-00

69
FUTURE DIMENSION OF A PERSON

We should accept the 'other'

indiscriminately and wholeheartedly
not judging them
on their past or present actions
but rather embracing them
on the basis of their future
existence
since we are all potential saints
in the spirit.

Surely if we appreciated the future dimension

of every person
this would radically change
the way we treated others.

Strathfield
8-xii-00

70
TAKE, EAT

The great temptation in life

is to reduce our rapport
with those around us
to a bare minimum
ultimately relating on an impersonal
level
and thereby exchanging meaningless words
instead of giving ourselves wholly
and allowing the 'other'
to consume us totally -
"Take, eat, this is my body"
holy communion.

Strathfield
8-xii-00

71
A TRUE FRIEND

A true friend is one

with whom you can communicate
honestly
beyond the false mask of civility
which is commonly put up
and one who is totally committed
to rejoice in your happiness
to mourn in your sadness
to delight together
and
to identify wholly with your condition.

Strathfield
9-xii-00

72
THE BEGGAR
"for God loves a cheerful giver"
St Paul to the Corinthians

I must thank the beggar on the street

whose path I crossed
this evening as He looked at me
with those piercing eyes
and outstretched hands
lying in a corner wrapped in an
old and dirty blanket
because through him I discovered
a most important truth
- that it is not enough to give
but one must give
cheerfully and generously
so as to fill all of life with joy and delight
- life in all abundance!

Town Hall
14-xii-00

73
SIN MISUNDERSTOOD

How egocentric we have become

thinking only of ourselves
even in our sins
where we worry only
because we have tainted our "clean" self
much like a person worries when
having dirtied a new and expensive suit
and not because we have ruptured
a relationship with another person.

Perhaps in our narcissism we have forgotten

that sin in is not simply breaching a moral norm
but first and foremost
a shedding of tears
because we have been unfaithful
out of lack of love
and broken our communion
with the other
from whom derives our life in all its fullness.

Redfern
15-xii-00

74
MY MUSIC TEACHER'S FUNERAL

Attending today the funeral

of my music teacher at our College
I could not help but think of
the paradox of life -
that is how we constantly strive
for life everlasting
yet are plagued by the tragedy
of our mortality.

Yet the joy of Christ is that even

this He has assumed and
taken away once and for all
in His ineffable love for us.

Therefore the death of "Archon"

is clouded both by a mist of sadness
yet at the same time
a glimpse of hope
a clarification of this apparent contradiction
- death swallowed up and conquered
by everlasting victory
as his memory will live on
through us his ever grateful students.

Redfern
15-xii-00

75
SAB101 SPIRITUALITY

Even this has become an academic discipline

where we seek out the ends of the earth
to learn to live
our life in Christ
from holy guides
instead of just desiring intensely
to experience Him
yet nobody wishes to see the absurdity
of such nonsense
- SAB101 Spirituality

Is it too hard to become as children

experiencing the miracle of God
in all aspects of life
just like my little nephew is consumed
with joy and gratitude
at the miracle of heaven
right down here on earth.

Strathfield
16-xii-00

76
THE HORIZON

A great and marvellous wonder

I experienced whilst
admiring the beautiful horizon.

I noticed the limitless and transcendent sky

extending high above the earth
as far as our eyes could see
making its descent to greet
our lowly earth.

And I took pleasure at the majestic sight

because I was reminded of the coming of Christ:
who was from the very beginning of time
enthroned together with His Father
high up in the skies
yet freely willed to bow the heavens
descending right down here on earth
to dwell among us
Christ - our true horizon.

Let us welcome this horizon-like mystery

with joy and thankfulness
as the path to the heavens have been opened
giving us a taste of the breath of Paradise
and bestowing on us the fullness of eternal life
- our destined blissful state.

Redfern
18-xii-00

77
THE BUTTERFLY

In order for the butterfly to become

the beautiful creature that it is
with its wonderfully patterned wings
and colours
giving it the ability to fly
with quick skipping flight
totally independent
amongst the flowers
it knows all too well that it must embark on
a most difficult yet transformative journey
towards this desired freedom:
from a caterpillar
it must shed its old skins
cocoon itself
apparently dying
in order for a shoot of a new and unfading
liberating life to appear.

Each time I encounter a butterfly I am reminded

of this most important truth:
that we must never become complacent
in our present state
but must endure all pains and sufferings
living with the conviction
that these struggles will ultimately
bring about the joy of freedom
which we all long for
from the inner most depths of our souls.

Strathfield
21-xii-00

78
ANOTHER YEAR

Many of us consider time

or the passing of another year as an enemy
choosing to see
in the yearly cycles of the universe
only a meaningless repetition
ultimately there to draw us
as we age each year
farther and farther
into our slow annihilation
and final death.

I however would rather choose to believe

that time and in fact every year
has been given to us
not as a threat
to create within us terror and our slow decay
but rather our path to an eternal realm.

Time is that opportunity given to us

from above as a gift
allowing us to choose to live
every moment of time in love
because by freely choosing to love
we temporal creatures
open ourselves up
to another eternal dimension
- those heavenly beams of unending love
God who is Eternal Love.

Strathfield
31-xii-00

79
LOVE AND FREEDOM

Love in total freedom

Be free in love
- two realities
not opposed
but interdependent
for where there is no voluntary choice
there can be no true love.

Strathfield
31-xii-00

80
A FASCINATING REVELATION

I gaze out during the late hours of the day

into the distant moonlit sky
magically shedding light on the endless
serene waters of the ocean;
I also notice the low-lying clouds
brightly glowing from the light of the moon
and decorating the horizon.

As I open my eyes to the countless stars

all alight with their own unique intensity
and listen to the sound of the ocean winds
the splashing of the waters
making their way to quench
the thirst of the dry sand
a reality beyond what can merely be seen
is awoken with me.

I feel a sense of liberating release

as I am led by the hand like a small child
to behold with amazement
a wonderful miracle
- the gentle majesty of creation
speaking to me, inviting me
to join this festal all-night celebration.

A memorable blissful moment

there to be enjoyed by all
who surrender themselves to the wonder
of this mysterium tremendum.

Surfers Paradise
7/i/01

81
FAITH

An intense trust
devoid of any logical explanation
growing out of a passionate love
for our personal God.

Surfers Paradise
8/i/01

82
THE ENDLESS DANCE OF THE OCEAN

O what gentle sense of wonder

and pure enjoyment
I experience
in beholding the waves break
on the seashore
something which some would consider
such a simple and mundane occurrence of nature
but I would rather call
the endless dance of the ocean
giving the chance to all
without prejudice
to delight in such caressing which comes
whilst swimming and taking part
in this ocean dance
to listen to the melody it continually sings
accompanying all on their daily walks
and to lull all to sleep at night
- a feeling of unending celebration.

Surfers Paradise
9/i/01

83
DREAMS

Thank you for teaching me that dreams

are not just creations of
our own subconscious
but revelations from outside
of truths
beyond what our one dimensional world view
can accept.

Surfers Paradise
9/i/01

84
TRUE COMMUNION

When relating with another person

it is not enough simply
to pay attention to what is merely said
as this is simply a listening exercise
in understanding what is being shared
important as it may be.

More importantly we must remain vigilant

trying at all times
to discern what the 'other'
really means
because only in this way
can we really feel
our way into the treasure of another person's
heart and soul
- true communion.

Surfers Paradise
9/i/01

85
BROADENING SORROW

ejn qlivyei ejplavtunav" me

Isn't it a paradox
that in times of suffering and sorrow
which should logically make us feel
asphyxiated since by definition "sorrow" means
"a crushing of spirits"
we can nevertheless feel
a broadening of our horizons
a maturing of our personality
- in short
a meaningful learning experience -
but only if this sorrow is offered to Christ
who alone can give it
this transformative power.

Surfers Paradise
10/i/01

86
FEELING GLUM

Feeling glum cannot be stopped

so we must encounter
this depressing emptyness
whenever we are faced
with it
for it can speak to us
reminding us of quintessential
eternal verities.

During these times

when we feel dispirited
we can choose to allow
the fullness of life to enter within:
that is to say,
that life-creating spirit
which can totally fill us
from within
so that we can experience
the transforming power
of the inflowing gifts
of growth, purification, discovery
and greater learning
to empower us and radically change us
towards a life worth living.

Surfers Paradise
10/i/01

87
MISSING YOU

Truly we are "relational" beings

because away from you
I find myself continually missing you
but no so much
because I am lonely
and desire to gratify my feelings
of "aloneness" and "solitude"
as there are many people around me
wherever I may go.

Rather I find myself continually missing you

because I feel a longing to experience
your person wholly -
those every little details
of the way you smile, walk or talk
which make you uniquely you.

Missing you - truly

a beautiful gift reminding us
that we are truly persons
to the extent that we thirst
to commune with those
whom we love.

Surfers Paradise
13/i/01

88
ODE TO ARCHBISHOP STYLIANOS

How can I ever repay you for the wonderful gifts

you have so openly handed down to me
in those short yet most profound
years of my life.

I take a moment to reminisce just how much

you have radically changed my life
and one incident comes to mind -
feeling down one day
merely seeing you from afar
whilst you were taking your afternoon walk
I was quite suddenly filled with
such inexpressible joy and peace
wondrous and thankful to the miracle
that you had comforted me
like you always do
yet this time without even speaking to me
- what an inexhaustibly sharing of yourself
with all your children
every moment of the day, I thought.

You have inspired me by your life's example

and your tremendous sincerity
- a mark of a true teacher -
specifically to live my life authentically
which means totally free
for me to discover the real and unique me
my distinct vocation in life
as God intended.
And oh, what a beautiful paradox I experience
the more I assimilate to those
God-given talents I have found in you
the more free I become
acquiring wings to fly.

For all this I will always be grateful

to you
knowing full well that I will
never be able to repay you
but this one promise I will make -
- to share these truths
with those around me
giving to all who so wish
this liberating taste
of ineffable heavenly joy
here and now.

Surfers Paradise
15/i/01

89
CONFIDENCE

Confidence, contrary to what many may think

is not to have a firm trust only in yourself
that if you try hard enough
you will definitely succeed
as modern psychology often propagates.

Rather con-fidence as the word suggests

- [faith with or faith in someone] -
is to realise that true boldness and gallantry come
to the extent that we learn
to trust with others or trust in others
which implies attempting to live our lives
not pretending that we have got it all together
but instead to take small steps of faith
with other people
because there is no other way of living our life
to the fullest
unless we are willing
to share it with others and for others.

Strathfield
25/i/01

90
LETTING GO

Many a times I find myself

using the rhetoric of
leaving everything in
the hands of God
yet at the same time desperately
clinging on and
doing all in my feeble means
to influence a certain "situation".
Oh if only I could let go of
my self-centred will
and instead simply let God
lead me to a life of freedom.

Strathfield
7-ii-01

91
SITTING NEXT TO YOU

"as you did it to the least of

my brethren you did it to me"
Gospel according to Matthew

Isn't it amazing but every human being

whether they know it or not
has little pieces of God within them
- their conscience
how else could I explain my total amazement
to all those God-given teachings
you were sharing with me
without you even knowing it
whilst sitting on a ferry next to you
sharing moments of life together.
That is why excuse my total perplexity
upon realising in total surprise
the awesome mystery before me
- you -
the entirely other,
yet my most tangible
and closest god.

Manly
26-ii-01

92
EVERY RELATIONSHIP

In every relationship where two persons communicate

which means sharing everything
with one another,
we should not remain bitter if something
has not worked out
This is insignificant when compared to the great adventure
that we have dared to take
to move beyond our limited self
giving our hearts to another person
only to discover that upon returning
back to ourself
we are all the richer and broader for it.
Surely better to have painfully lived in loving
than to have never loved before.

Strathfield
28-ii-01

93
MOVING ON

Moving on is not to be seen

only negatively
- as that time when we experience
in a most real and powerful way
a painful emptiness and bitter tears
because even the gift of tears
given to us from above
can be that moment of liberation
- a true moving on
where we are washed completely
from the inside.

Moving on, truly a wiping clean of

all our unnecessary anxieties
and a beholding of the open road ahead
the unexplored opportunity
ever before us.

Sutherland
2-iii-01

94
FOOL'S GOLD

Why is it that we that we possess gold

in our hands
even though unworthily
and yet we try to justify
it to others
excusing its lustre and brightness
its form or colour.
Perhaps we have replaced reality
which alone can give us life
and life abundantly
with falsity
- with fool's gold.

Strathfield
5-iii-01

95
CRUTCHES

In his immense love He tirelessly cares for us

in our broken and fragmented state
by sending us crutches in the form of people
who unknowingly help us find ourself
and the destiny for which
each of us was uniquely called.

But upon re-discovering this our destiny

and calling
we need to let go of our crutches
thereby allowing total healing to take its course.

Why is it that we cling to our sickness instead of

allowing for total healing to take place?

Strathfield
6-iii-01

96
UNNECESSARY ANXIETY

How dare I be anxious

over people's journey
to find you,
O Liberating Truth
because in so doing not only
do I forget that even in this
You give the initiating push
in Your own good time
for this journey to begin
but also that You love us all
equally
in our uniqueness and diversity.

Redfern
6-iii-01

97
YOU ARE MY BOMB

O my only true Comforter, you are not

simply some type of fertiliser
which helps us "cope" through
difficult situations.

It is true, o God, you are a "bomb"

Who in totally destroying
our feeble existence
radically renews it
and instils it
with little "bits" of eternity!

Strathfield
7-iii-01

98
BETRAYAL

I betray You day and night

yet You are my life and
my only existence
and could not consider myself
ever truly worthy to receive
You.
Yet even in this your immeasurable love
do I dare to come again
to taste Your sacred body
and life giving blood
again and again.

Redfern
12-iii-01

99
MY CONSTANT ANXIETY

How to persuade others of the fullness of truth

found in God's word
when the sensitive person
will see the tragedy of my shortcomings and divisions.
Therefore, my constant anxiety
- how to make the joy of Christ
ever more present to all around
knowing fully well that His love embraces all.

Redfern
12-iii-01

100
SAVING A BEE

Did I ever tell you how touched I was

at your sensitivity and love
for the created world
when you related your simple story
to me
that as a young girl
when you would see a simple little bee
helpless in your swimming pool
which would probably go unnoticed
by the most of us
you would jump into the water
to save it.
This simple gesture of love
on your part
but such a profound insight
not only revealing to us
your love and gratitude,
your feeling of solidarity with
all of God's created world
but also our responsibility
to care for every little detail
of the universe
and not to simply use it or worse still abuse it.

Strathfield
14-iii-01

101
A SPIDER

Upon glancing at a spider

outside my bedroom window
one early morning
my immediate reaction was to kill it
as we have been accustomed
to see these creatures
with their poisonous venom
as our enemy.

But I could not do this as I chose instead

to fix my gaze upon it
with the innocent wonder
of a child
marvelling at the beauty of the web
it had so finely spun
looking at it slowly satisfying its hunger
by slowing nibbling on a little insect
which had been caught on its web
and all I could do is dare to dream of the day
where nothing will be considered
as our enemy
but instead an unimaginable solidarity
will reign with the entire created order
allowing us to caress these beautiful creatures.

Strathfield
14-iii-01

102
UNIVERSAL SOLIDARITY

I feel such deep affinity with

with every flower
every animal
even every stone or sea shell
and of course with every human person
because I know just how deeply related
we all are
in the fact that we have all one thing in common
- our createdness in need of salvation.
O that I could be sensitive enough to hear
the voice of this my greatest need
from every detail of the universe
since all are heralds proclaiming
God's love for all creation.

Redfern
15-iii-01

103
STRATHFIELD STATION

What soothing joy I experienced

this late afternoon
whilst sitting on a bench outside
Strathfield station
waiting for the bus to take me home
and listening in ecstasy at the singing
of the many birds
right above me in the trees.

Their harmonious chirping like that of

a well trained orchestra
was telling me clearer than any human voice
to rejoice and be glad
in the beauty of creation
therefore leading me in solidarity with them
to give glory and praise
to the Bestower of these great gifts.

Strathfield
15-iii-01

104
NURTURING THE SEED OF LOVE

If you o God have planted the seed of love

as the true mode of existence
within every human person
it is left to us to water this seed
not only daily
but every moment of our life
in all our interactions both with people
and every detail of creation
and this means always giving
continually surrendering
our will for the good of the other.
In this we gain strength not only because You
loved us first
but because we feel our deepest thirst
quenched indeed
in loving with the same love
that you loved us first
Come all, let us rejoice in nurturing the seed
of love within each of us
seeing it blossoming into a beautiful flower.

Strathfield
24-iii-01

105
CREATIVE SUFFERING

They tell me that not only do I suffer in my grief

but enjoy torturing myself in this way
in seemingly difficult situations
that I find myself in.
But alas let me share with you a secret…..
o what a comforting paradox
I feel
in such circumstances when my only intention
has been to act in a loving manner
then the suffering associated with this
is not pointless and does not
tend to our
agonising destruction
but is creative and life-giving
in fact the only real thing in this world.
You rightly ask, how do I know this -
I feel this inexpressible joy
during such sincere and true encounters
each time I give room for Love to act in me
in this way!

Strathfield
24-iii-01

106
O BLESSED PARADOX

Knowing that I am loved by God

in a way infinitely greater
than a lover madly in love
with his beloved
how can I not, at the very least
attempt to love in this
same way
which means living only to please
You
- my entirely other
because in this loving craziness of mine
I experience not death
but the abundance of life
I discover that you are not only the 'other'
but my very existence and life
- o what a blessed paradox you are!

Redfern
29-iii-01

107
MY SPECIAL FRIEND

I have learned that to be

with those I like is enough
Walt Whitman (1819-1892

Each time I speak with you

or even see you from afar
I am overcome with so much joy
and upon thanking our Bestower
for such a priceless gift granted to me
- the unworthy one
I reflect as to how it could be possible
that I feel so much bliss
a sense of wholeness
as if before our meeting I were incomplete
and I dare to ask myself
could it really be that a friend
is a single soul
dwelling in two bodies -
as Aristotle pointed out.
Therefore my silent cry for togetherness
to be connected
with that other part of me
so as behold the world anew and integral
through you!

Bankstown
3-vi-01

108
MY PROMISE - MY EPAGGELMA

As a 'theologian' my profession or promise

since both these words have the same root
in Greek
will be not simply to describe
the truths of life about God
since these are implanted in the deepest recesses
of every person
nor will it be to dispense religious facts
about the Scriptures or other theological traditions.
Rather it will be to dive into the abyss of God's love
and then to share this love affair with others
thereby contributing to people's enthusiasm to
sing a new song,
and to nurture a passion for the mystery of God's love
thus responding to their deepest longing
that they are not alone but that the Lord is
still with us!

Redfern
5-iv-01

109
GREAT AND HOLY SATURDAY

O great and holy Saturday

the most beautiful of all days
since you are not only as some would contend
the day when all creation sleeps
or simply a day of rest
rather you are the day of eager expectation
because beneath the surface of reality
the greatest miracle of all is taking place -
Our life which up to this point was bound
to black embraced loneliness in Hades
is given the possibility once again
to commune and be reconciled in love
with all creation.
O holy and great Saturday, a day for really rejoicing
at this most profound transformation
from self-love to self-less love
at this explosion of love and life
abounding everywhere.

Strathfield
14-iv-01

110
PATIENT LOVE

It is true that love is patient as You have taught us

because "patience" as the word suggests
in Greek
implies to "remain" in a certain situation
even though it may not be going
what you would consider to be best for you.

Why is it that we have been conditioned by society

to strongly desire to be self-sufficient
a feeling of wanting to be in control always
and judging the world only through our eyes
and not through the eyes of another person
especially our beloved other?

Rather I would dare to propose the entirely and radically

opposite ideal to strive for…
blessed is that love which is able to become
patient like our mother earth
- always trodden on yet enduring and nurturing
all in love
- always happy to receive all things that come her way
both the good and the bad
which she will take and transform
into vitamins and nutrients for herself
Therefore, come all let us love patiently
like our mother earth
and even though some may make you feel
that you are being treated unjustly
deep within your heart and soul you will be feeling
the greatest joy of having experienced
patient love.

Strathfield
16-iv-01

111
A FLOWER BUDDING

There is infinitely more delight in watching a flower

slowly blossom at every stage of
its miraculous growth
than just anxiously awaiting to see what
will ultimately result.
So take some time and enjoy fully the continuous moments:
the seedling sprouting out from the ground
for the very first time
to take pleasure in the warmth of the sun
and the enjoyment of the endless blue sky
the appearance of its green leaves
taking time to show off their fresh russet foilage
the milky green stem branches thrusting forth
to become ever more stable
in order to withstand the ever changing seasons
the gentle wind caressing it all over after
the rain has quenched its thirst
giving off a most evocative sweet aromatic scent
the budding flower opening its petals only after having experienced
the warm inviting rays of the sun
the outer sepal protecting the delicate colours of the flower
bursting with life
So it is with the blossoming of a friendship -
let us learn to enjoy its every stage
and not concern ourselves with where it will lead
in the distant future ….

Moorebank
22-iv-01

112
ATHONITE EYES

Upon setting my glance on you

as you set foot from your plane
o holy father
I was indeed mesmerised by your green child-like eyes
as in them was reflected a piercing happiness
and gladness
found only in the eyes of children
which was proclaiming to me in silence
the joyfulness of life -
for your eyes expressed such an ardent love for me
whom you had never met
that they were able to embrace my sorrow
annihilating and transforming it
to a feeling of pure bliss within me.
O the tenderness of your athonite eyes.

Sydney Airport
24-iv-01

Upon meeting Bishop Chrysostomos of Rodostolou

113
AD EUSTRATIUM

You are completely correct in saying that

we must not simply construct
an "idea" of how to live our life
since an idea of life is simply an intellectual concept
ultimately an abstraction
but not the real thing
since the fullness of life includes
delighting in her with all the senses:
taste, smell, taste, touch and sight.
Only with all these
will we be able to enjoy life
in all its fullness
in all its integrity
and in all its totally
- a reflection of life in all of
its abundance.

Centennial Park
25-iv-01

114
A HUMAN BEING

The human being

a most wonderful creature
- who unlike the animal
since it belongs only to the created realm -
has at the same time
both spirit and flesh
body and soul
is earthly yet heavenly
material and spiritual
midway between grandeur and lowliness.
You ask why such a paradox
- the answer is that only the human being
has the breath of life within
reflecting God's eternal magnificence
in creaturely form.
Let us ever remember with a sense of wonder
the continuing miracle of
our own personhood
and praise our Creator for we have been
marvellously made
greater than the angels since they are only spirit.

Strathfield
29-iv-01

115
A HUMAN BEING CONTINUED

Human beings must feel a sense of solidarity

with all the creatures of the animal kingdom
as you correctly reminded me
however only human persons are the pinnacle
of creation
not so much because they alone
have the ability to act out of logic
or freely to some extent
but only to the human being has God breathed
His loving Spirit
giving us also the possibility to love in freedom.

Therefore the more we love the more

we reflect our true and unique vocation
to serve to both sanctify and transform
the rest of creation along with ourselves.

Strathfield
29-iv-01

116
TRUE BEAUTY

True beauty is the treasure of the heart

reflected in the face of
a human person.

Wynyard
30-iv-01

117
GODLY LOVE

The greatest joy and gift in life

is to know
that I am loved by another person
not for what I offer them as gifts
nor what I do
but primarily for who I am
both in my grandeur and squalor!

It was this godly love I felt you were

showering me with
when you so frankly urged me
to be me
to be free!

Redfern
1-v-01

118
LOVE OF THE HEART

"It is right for me to think this of you

because I have you in my heart"
Philippians 1:7

In talking about their beloved other

I hear so many people say
that their loved one is always
on their mind
and this is not to be criticised
since it is a first step
to authentic love.

True love however is to have your beloved other

not in your mind but
in your heart
where that person can come at any time
and quite unexpectedly warm your
inner most being
with their radiating presence
thus destroying all glum feelings from within.

Whereas if our beloved other was simply

in our minds
they could make us remember certain events
of the past
but definitely not light up
our whole existence.
Oh how much more love when we can love
with our heart.

Strathfield
6-v-01

119
OUR WORLD AN ENDLESS DREAM

This endless dream we have been

born into
never ceases to reveal
its joyful face
in countless different ways
every day
of our brief life.

With the break of every dawn

comes yet another surprise
in the bestowing of numerous gifts
so generously given
to us
to simply enjoy.

Today I behold the face of the world's

radiance and glow
as I take a few moments
whilst driving to work
to delight in the abounding delicate red leaves
covering a magnificent grand tree
against a backdrop of a
perfect autumn blue sky!

Burwood
17-v-01

120
INTELLECTUALISM

Why is it that some people can be

so intellectually bright
yet still feel so impoverished
and lack meaning in life.
I believe the answer to this is that
there is so much more to
a human person
than just the intellect.
Unless we learn to nurture not only the mind
but also
the body,
the soul
and the spirit
we are not participating in the abundance
of all our human faculties
of feeling, intuition…
and not delighting
in the richness and magnificence
of our God-given
human nature.

Redfern
17-v-01

121
LOVE DESCENDING

I am moved to speechless heights

at the miracle before
my very eyes -
I behold Love descending from above
in silent voice
and presenting itself
in such an infinitely gentle
yet persistent manner
and awaiting our acceptance in freedom
in order to make Himself known
as someone more real and intimate
than anybody else in life -
your only constant
in this ever changing society
your inner most yearning and
love of your soul.

Redfern
17-v-01

122
NEW DEPTHS OF CONSCIOUSNESS

In discovering who we really are

and all that we were created to be
more often than not requires pain
since growing into ever new depths
of consciousness
always means daring to take new steps
- even ever so slight ones -
into that dark undiscovered part
of our inner self.
But alas this necessary journey
need not be scary
since ultimately what is unfolded
is the real inner YOU -
that is godly Light which dwells
within the darkness of us all.

Redfern
17-v-01

123
PARADOXICAL FREEDOM

Freedom contrary to what some may believe

is not what an individual
feels like doing at whatever moment
in time
since this in reality is bondage
to those fleeting wishes.
Rather one can breathe the refreshing air
of freedom
only in freely submitting oneself to
the other in communion.
Only with this type of "paradoxical" freedom
can you find true fulfilment
and extend yourself into eternity.

City
1-vi-01

124
A POSITIVE "NO"

Only to the extent that we can

say "no"
to the love of another person
can our "yes" be offered
in total freedom.
Therefore your "no" in a deeper sense
a supremely affirmative possibility
of a true encounter with another person.

City
1-vi-01

125
MANIC LOVER

O God you have spoken to us

through your prophets
by your very self
and now in the silent breathing
of your loving Spirit
constantly declaring in these countless and
inaudible ways
your manic love
for us.

Yet in your ever indescribable respect

for the freedom of
of your creation
you have willed to veil your existence
by covering our eyes
with your hands
but your love-beyond-words
on Cross
allows us to behold your
ineffable Beauty
by the windows of eternity left behind
by your pierced nails.

Strathfield
2-vi-01

126
AN EVER REMEMBERED ANT

I write this thought to remember always

in this life
my insensitivity and disregard for your world
o Loving Creator of All
in not being able to behold the grandeur
of your art work
in a tiny ant climbing up my jumper.

As I saw it I spontaneously just rubbed it off

and would not have given it second thought
had it not been that it fell on the white page
of the book I was reading
right before my very eyes.

And I could not help but tear at the eyes

as I beheld its beauty and perfection
on the one hand
yet its wretched plight and broken legs
due to my fleeting hand action
ultimately seeing it come to its painful death
on the white page
there to remind me always of my
gross insensitivity
and lack of love!

Strathfield
2-vi-01

127
DECISION

If we truly want to live life fully

as opposed to simply allowing
life's event to determine us
we must not run away from whatever situations
life may present
but rather freely encounter every moment
with our God-given
responsibility of choosing.

Redfern
12-vi-01

128
SEEING CLEARLY

Have you noticed that in order to see clearly

our eyes have this miraculous ability
of shedding their outer cell layers
every two weeks
and replacing them with new ones
thus allowing for
an ever clearer vision.
O that we have so much to learn from this:
if our only desire is to see the world
through our old eyes
we will never give ourselves the opportunity
to perceive clearly the joy of new experiences
into our life.
Like our eyes let us rid ourselves of the familiar
and welcome the strange
since every "old" idea that is put aside
the more that we allow for newer
experiences
and therefore our gradual growth to become
all that we were created to be
in all our uniqueness.

Redfern
12-vi-01

129
THE SACREDNESS OF MARRIAGE

If true happiness in life is found in reflecting

the love of our True Lover
then surely the sacredness of marriage
lies in this:
that two people decide to live the fullness of this life
by rejecting their egocentric existence
and instead choosing to place primary importance
by sharing all and communicating all
on their beloved other
but this requires our decisive action
to at least want to live in this way.

Strathfield
14-vi-01

130
THE WIND A MIRACLE

Just as the wind radically invigorates our whole being

by caressing us with the wintry freshness
of its breeze
and we know it exists since we experience it
even though it is invisible
so is our relationship with our Life-giving Breeze
rejuvenating and reanimating us wonderfully
even though we can not prove Its visible existence
we experience its invisible subsistence.

Strathfield
14-vi-01

131
ABRUPT - I THINK NOT

The simple gesture of a woman telling another person

to put on his jumper as he ventures
out into the cold
since he is indifferent to the high probability
of catching a cold
would seem abrupt to some as this may appear
at first sight
to imprison a man's horizons
since within every man is a false sense
of mastery over the forces of nature.
Yet as I take a moment to think of this gesture I immediately discover
its profundity
when your only intention is that of an admirable instinct
within the soul of every woman
predisposing her to protect, care and watch over life
rather than to merely seize or conquer it.

Randwick
16-vi-01

132
A FULFILING EXPERIENCE

As we sat one early wintry evening

in such humble surrounding
- in fact a simple 'bus-stop' seat
outside a quiet suburban street
just having a meal together
- with you my friend -
I could not help but feel quite to my surprise
at first
that all the riches of the world
could not adequately pay for
the warmth, the wholeness and peace
I experienced
just sitting next to you
without the "five-star" comforts
that we falsely think will give us
happiness.
Today I discover that in the presence
of a Christ-like friend
all worldly affluence
even a most precious diamond
quite suddenly loses its once
appealing lustre.

Kogarah
19-vi-01

133
BEHOLDING BEAUTY

To have found a friend in whose very 'face'

radiates the very person of Christ Himself
is to have unworthily been granted
the most awesome of all gifts
beyond compare
whereby life from that very encounter
is never ever the same again
because in beholding such Beauty all of life becomes
full of beauty, that is beauti-ful.

Strathfield
20-vi-01

134
PRIESTLY JOY

What pure joy a priest must experience I noted

as I came one afternoon
to restore my most treasured
friendship with my God
- knowing just how much pain
I cause Him in falling short of all the He
created me to be -
since it is only the priest
who witnesses and shares in the miracle of
my encounter and reconciliation
with God
who beholds the overflowing blessings
coming upon us all
when we leave feeling so united
and inseparable
to His eternal love
who shares together with us
our personal crucifixion yet our radical
resurrection
right before his very eyes
step by step
- what pure priestly joy!

Circular Quay
21-vi-01

135
MYSTERIOUS LOVE

O Love,
You are so mysterious
not so much because You are unknown
to us.
Rather You are so because even though
we experience You
like something more real
than anything else in life
we cannot understand You
since You are beyond our feeble logic
so we are simply left
to take pleasure in You.
And upon experiencing such bliss in loving
we are left in awe
proclaiming "what is it that you do to us
That make us love You?"

Redfern
27-vi-01

136
YOUR UNIQUE CALLING

Discover your unique calling in life

and this will bring with it such
comforting peace
and pure joy
deep within your very being
only like that experienced on the faces
of little children.
And this calling for me I quite unexpectedly
discovered one bright yet cold afternoon
would be to help others discover 'once again'
their lost "smile" within
and their gem-like talents
which like delicate crystals are in danger
of being broken
if not developed in love
thereby not giving us all around
the opportunity to enjoy
their uniquely ever-radiating
presence.

Redfern
28-vi-01

137
HUMBLE ADVICE

Tell me what it is you want

in this life
and I will tell you who to
marry!

Strathfield
29-vi-01

138
O GENTLE HEART

"Love does not insist on its own way"

(1 Corinthians 13:5)

Do not be sad as you 'pack' up your emotions

to offer yourself in love
to the soul of another person
Rather be joyous and remember all
those wonderful moments
that you enjoyed in sharing yourself
entirely with an 'other';
keep alive the beauty of the world
that you beheld in such a way
that in your loneliness you could never
have even dreamt it to be such;
Be ever mindful even of those 'tearful' moments
because even those gave rise to
such bursting growth within your inner being.
O gentle heart remember the magnificence of the world
that you experienced through that
other person's eyes
inviting you to ever deeper levels of
consciousness
And remember, above all, to be grateful
for all eternity
for being accounted worthy
to behold those little moments of loving reality
which have consolidated your resolve
to live your whole life
in that mode of loving
as this love will never vanish away!

Strathfield
30-vi-01

139
SHUNNING HAPPINESS

Love means to strive to be

elated unceasingly.
(Emile Verhaeren)

Why is it that most people

shun happiness,
refuse to be drunk with life?
Maybe it is because they do not
love passionately
but instead choose to encounter every circumstance
by logically calculating what will
bring about the best outcome.
The secret is however that all the knowledge
in the world of a certain situation
will not bring happiness if not confronted
in love.
Strathfield
2-vii-01

140
BEHOLDING BEAUTY

Learn to behold the grandeur and the beauty

in all created things
even the last speck of dust
as these will lead you closer
in doxology
to the creator of Beauty
- God who fills all
with His loving presence.

Redfern
6-vii-01

141
BIRTH OF LOVE

The birth of love between two people -

a sudden and unexpected spark
which at first may seem
something so fragile and flickering
but nevertheless can strongly radiate its overflowing light
to warm and fill with awesome joy
the whole of my existence.

Therefore take time to delight in this sparkling

and comforting sensation
enjoying and savouring to the fullest
its every new taste
offering it to the last of your taste buds
before venturing to other experiences
as only this will become the strong foundation
for yet other beautiful
loving moments for rejoicing.

Newtown
17-vii-01

142
BIRTH OF LOVE continued

The birth of love between two people

something so beautiful and delicate
like a new born baby
which is experiencing life
for the very first time
and needs time to gain strength
therefore remains home for forty days
before venturing out
to expose itself to others.

Strathfield
18-vii-01

143
BEYOND WORDS

Your love and care leaves me

totally speechless
like a little child
experiencing the miracle of life
for the very first time
and striving to find words to express
this blissful joy and peace
beyond words!

Strathfield
18-vii-01

144
A DELICATE SPROUTING

I will be the first to protest

o loving Lord
at those who proclaim
falsely
that there are no miracles
in life
as I have experienced one
so awesome
that I walk around soberly drunk
and in constant gratitude
to You
at having beheld right before
my very eyes
the delicate sprouting
of love and tender care
between two people
and therefore I desire nothing but
to protect it
so as not to damage
even in the slightest
its ineffable beauty.

Summer Hill
19-vii-01

145
LIGHT-FILLED DARKNESS

Many times we do not know

where it is we are being called
to venture
and we feel totally lost
and in total darkness.
But it is in such moments
when we feel all alone
and in tears give ourselves
entirely to you
o Love
- God who is love -
that we experience in this our state
of tear filled eyes
a peaceful joy
where we quite suddenly realise
that only by surrendering totally
our every moment of this life
to love
will this selfless giving light the way
and as glittering stars flood
our darkness before us
with an abundance of joyous light.

My Bedroom
23-vii-01

146
THE COURSE OF LOVE

We cannot direct the course of love

for godly love directs our path.
So when called by you O Divine Love
- God you who are Love -
let us gladly follow you
though Your ways
are difficult and steep!

Redfern
24-vii-01

147
LOVE - A POWER BEYOND THE HUMAN

If we do not believe in the power of love

then for all eternity we will suffer
from a lack of self renouncing
yet comforting love!
If we do believe in love however
then even in its absence
when darkness will seem
to totally encompass us
love will discretely ever be present
warming the wintery nights
of our soul
and lighting the way before us
even in the form of a flickering candle light
which never burns out.

Redfern
24-vii-01

148
BEAUTY IN THE INSIGNIFICANT

The most simple and at first glance

"insignificant" of moments
like your sweet and gentle calling
of my name "Philip"
over the telephone
was the cause of so much joy
for me
since I felt that it was said
so lovingly by you
You may ask how I know this:
the sober happiness I instantly felt
spontaneously breaking out
in doxological 'song'
realising yet again what
an undeserved gift of love
God has so wastefully bestowed
upon us
- thank You!

Strathfield
27-vii-01

149
FROM IDEA TO REALITY

Many people would believe that "love"

is the most perfect idea
in this world
but it can only become real
when it is incarnated
daily in all our actions
towards the "other"
whereby this love ceases to be an idea
and becomes a way of life
our very mode of existence!

Redfern
27-vii-01

150