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Desiree Shack

Professor Beadle

English 114A

07 May 2017

Changes You May Have

Learning how to write an essay isnt always easy, it takes time. However, over the course

of a period, you will be, if not, close to being an expert writer. The components of an essay

consist of the title, introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Without the proper listing of

those components in an essay, the reader will not accurately get the information and/or

arguments stated within an essay. In English 114A, students were required to write several

essays to better their writing. As I progressed, I learned how to execute a thesis, incorporate

quotes, and write opposing arguments to refute.

A thesis statement is a very important component to an essay. It tells your audience the

main idea of your essay, the evidence, and the order you will be presenting them throughout your

essay. When you give the reader a good thesis statement, you are trying to convince them that

your argument is a good and valid one. To create a thesis you have to first figure out what your

essay topic is going to be about. Once you have figured that out, you will then begin to figure out

who your audience is. Finally, you, as a writer, must give reasons for why the reader would want

to read your essay, this is the how is it important part. All the tools previously stated is what I

used while generating my thesis. Im definitely not an expert, yet; but I do see the improvement

from my Progression I to Progression II essay. My thesis statement for my Progression I essay

was, The main idea in the readings were to point out how and why society constructs gender
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roles. I needed to develop my thesis further by adding how and why does society construct

gender roles according to Lorber and Devor, that would have made my thesis statement more

complete. My Progression II thesis statement said, In the book, Composing Gender, authors

Claire Renzetti and Daniel Curran, prove that at an early age children are exposed to gender

stereotypes, in this case, Spongebob, and how it affects their future. Not much improvement is

seen physically through my writing; however, I know more about how to write a thesis statement

and what I could have done better to do so.

Incorporating quotes was a challenge for me because I was never able to make them a

smooth transition into sentences. The best possible way to write an essay and hold your

credibility of being an academic writing is to avoid dropped quotations, this means dropping

quotes with no explanation of why it was placed in a paragraph. I learned this after having people

peer review my essays. I was never that bad at incorporating quotes, but I did want to learn more

about how to include quotations within my writing. I included a quote in my Progression I essay

by saying, On page 27, she states, Women recruits in the US Marine Corps are required to

wear makeup--at minimum, lipstick and eyeshadow. I did not explain the relevance of why it

was placed in my essay; which would be explained right after the quote. In Progression II of my

essay, for example, I said, Im going to work. Im the dad, remember?(Hillenburg). I then

proceeded to explain what the quote meant to my essay--why was it important.

Stating a counter argument and refuting it shows that you see both sides of the story and

makes your argument stronger, especially in a persuasive essay. I struggled with making a

counter argument for many of my essays, but by the time we had reached Progression III I was

able to include it in my essay easily. My Progression I essay had no counter argument at all,
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which is why I revised it later on and added one. My thesis statement was that society constructs

gender roles, and my counter argument would be that society, of course, doesnt. I can now

refute the counter argument by using specific examples to make a stronger connection. I

progressed in making counter arguments by my third essay, but you can see it developing in my

Progression II essay. My counter argument for Progression II was that Spongebob was a

television show for entertainment, and I easily refuted it by saying that it affects our future

generations; following relative examples for proper evidence.

Improvement in an essay definitely takes time, and it starts with writing several essays.

Writing a thesis statement, incorporating quotes, and making arguments to refute are things I

learned more about, but Im sure theres more to learn, myself. Just like everything else in life, it

will take practice till Im a complete expert, but with the english classes at California State

University of Northridge provides and several written essays, itll be in no time.