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Kristina Balaguy

Mrs. Pagani

ERWC, Period 1

17 May, 2017

Reflection Letter

For my reflection letter I have chosen the Juvenile Justice essay, the Racial Profiling

essay, and the Into the Wild essay, the process work that helped me in the creation of these essays

would be the text from source charts, quickwrites, and rough drafts. From this work, I will reflect

on skills such as processing, and creating the perfect thesis, and my ability to support my main

ideas, but my disability to quote, cite, and summarize accurately. I will address my academic

essays, skills such as supporting evidence, and correct MLA formatting that I have learned;

however, I need to work on citing my evidence correctly, and making a proper works cited, and I

hope to one day be able to gain the ability to turn my weaknesses into strengths.

I will be analyzing Racial Profiling, Into the Wild, and the Juvenile Justice essays. In the

Racial Profiling Argumentative essay, written October 21, 2016, I argued that racial profiling is

unnecessary because it is ineffective, and it violates the constitutional right of all persons

receiving equal protection. In the case of Susan Smith, Smith led deputies on a misleaded case,

by mentioning the killer of her children was black, so the local police department would not

suspect her as the murderer. When South Carolinian Susan Smith, the convicted murderer of her

two young boys, sought to distract police from her own crime of drowning her two sons in a

lake, by alleging that it was a black man who committed the crime (Corlett 4). Not only did she

give false information to the police, the police went against the
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Equal Protection Clause, by pursuing her statement, and only hunting down an alleged African

American murderer. In the Into the Wild Literary Analysis essay, written November 16, 2016, I

argued that Chris McCandless was in fact a fool for going into the wild unprepared, and without

a trace. On McCandlesss journey, he met bystanders along the way who questioned his ability to

take this trip, and what was his plan if he had gotten into any trouble, and Chris had answered

everyone of their questions truthfully, he did not want to be found. When Gallien asked whether

his parents or a friend knew what he was up to- whether there was anyone who would sound the

alarm if he got into any trouble and was overdue- Alex answered calmly that no, nobody knew of

his plans that in fact he hadnt spoken to his family in two years (Krakauer 6). Chris had a death

wish for himself, he had no one to help him along the way, and when he needed help, and when

help arrived, McCandless was long gone. In the Juvenile Justice argumentative essay, written

March 3, 2017, I argued that the supreme court made the right decision to not sentence minor's

life to prison because, their brain is not fully developed, they would have no chance of

rehabilitation, and mental illness/depression is at a rise. Studies show, regions of the brain

responsible for controlling thoughts, actions, and emotions are not fully developed. They cannot

be held to the same standards when they committ terrible wrongs (Garinger 2). A child can not

be accountable as an adult only when the law says so. Children are only seen as adults, when

they make mistakes however, we do not acknowledge them as adults when they do something

right.

Prep work such as annotated articles, drafts, and evidence charts helped me on the road to

success for all of my essays. For my Bullying research paper, I used ERWC booklet articles to

my advantage, by analyzing and annotating the text that best demonstrated the long term effects
of bullying. Bullying victims, are more likely to suffer from health problems, such as fear,

anxiety, and depression,

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and developed psychological and physical scars that last a lifetime (Kuther 2). Without the

annotated articles, I would not had put any more effort than a google search on my topic. They

have provided me with evidence, and have educated me more along the way of the final draft.

Drafts have helped me along the way just as much, they have guided me to develop a more ideal

choice of words, and have caught many of grammar mistakes along the way. In my Personal

Narrative however, it had helped me develop a solid conclusion, The thought of college is

constantly on my mind, it pushed me in school, it motivates me to work hard, and keeps me out

of trouble. Nothing has impacted me as much as my dad leaving his family . It ended a little

rusty and amatuer like, but for my first paper of the year I am pleased with how it turned out, and

how I developed that sentence into an entire concluding paragraph. Lastly, the evidence charts

have helped me tremendously, especially with timed writes. I am a slow writer as it is, and

having the evidence set off aside, organized, and ready for me to copy has truly saved me in

many situations. In my Brave New World paper, I used the quote, Punctured, utterly defeated,

he dropped into a chair and covered his face with his hands, began to weep. A few minutes later,

however, he thought better of it and took four tablets of soma (Huxley 176), to support my

arguments, that we rely on anti-depressants to keep us happy. Preparing it, gave me the order I

wanted to use it in, the page number, and allowed me to organize how I wanted each quote to fit

into my thesis. Prep work has truly saved my grade from being lower, and has helped me prepare

for all my essays.


Along the way of my ERWC journey, I gained skills such as annotating text, creating a

thesis, writing topic sentences, editing drafts, and creating a final draft. In my Juvenile Justice

essay, I used the Juveniles Don't Deserve Life Sentences, by Gail Garinger, analysis on the myth,

that being a criminal is inherited. The most disturbing part of the superpredator myth is that is

presupposed that certain

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children were hopelessly defective, perhaps genetically so. Today, few believe that criminals

genes are inherited (Garinger 1). Garinger, made a point to show different perspectives on the

situation itself. Although only few believe criminal genes are inherited, people do still believe it,

and judge people based on their ancestors decision making. Another skill I gained is to creating a

claim and thesis. In my Bullying paper, Addressing Bullying, I put lots of time and effort into

making the perfect thesis, Bullying should be addressed by clarifying the cause of bullying, the

long term effects of bullying, different types of bullying, and advocating comprehensive

programs. I made an effort to organize my thesis properly, to make sense, from all the stages of

what bullying can actually do. I also gained the skill to make a topic sentence. Following Mrs.

Paganis words, to just take one prong of the the thesis, and make sure it is word for word. For

example, Bullying should be addressed by clarifying the causes of bullying. This has made it

easier for me to get each body paragraph started, and helped me get straight to the point. Drafting

also helped me along the way, by helping me draw out ideas, and allowing me to change the

ideas. In my racial profiling essay I changed,Racial profiling is unnecessary because it is

ineffective, into, Racial Profiling is the action of targeting individuals based on their race,

ethnicity, religion, and or nationals origin in my final draft. My rough draft had brought me

success to my final draft.


From multiple essays throughout the year, I was able to realize my strengths and

weaknesses. I would say some of my strengths would be writing a proper thesis, and

introduction. For into the Wild, my thesis got straight to the point, and showed my stance on

where I stood on Chris McCandless, Chris McCandless is a fool, because he went into the wild

unprepared, and without a trace. As for my introduction, it led me into the thesis. As an

outcome of his childhood, McCandless made an impulsive decision to wander off into the wild,

and make a life out of it. As for my weaknesses, they are clear, I

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cannot make a works cited accurately, and I always have grammar mistakes. For example, as Ms.

Pagani pointed out in my Bullying paper, they are not in works cited. How does she know if

they are valid?. As for grammar mistakes, I think too hard about it, and end up making easy

grammar points into mistakes. For example, in my Racial Profiling paper, I said, Pantaleos

claims in interviews and investigation, that he had had been using an act of defense that he

learned in the the Police Academy, however autopsy shows, that Pantaleo was indeed performing

a choke hold when the correct way would have been, Pantaleo's claims in interviews and

investigation, that he had been using an act of defense that he learned in the Police Academy;

however, autopsy shows, that Pantaleo was indeed performing a choke hold.

A skill I gained, that I did not have in the beginning of the year, would be being able to

transition from one subject to another. I can go from one paragraph to another smoothly, by using

transitioning sentences, and using information from my thesis to show the main idea of what the

paragraph is going to be about. For example, Bullying should be addressed by clarifying the

long term effects. This gets straight to the point, and allows the reader to know what we will be

analyzing in the paragraph that supports my thesis.


I believe I still need to work on my word choice leading up to quotes. In my Brave New

World timed write, Mrs. Pagani wrote DQ at the end of all quotes, which means dumped quotes.

I need to learn to be able to transition from main ideas within paragraphs.

This year, I learned that college reading and writing is not going to be easy unless I make

an effort. I need to not wait until last minute, and I need to process before an essay, such as

annotating articles, finding evidence, and taking notes. These skills transfer to all classes,

because it teaches me to

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be prepared for my work. In college, I believe I will be fine with the skills I have learned. I am a

little nervous however, because I will not have somebody telling me along the way what needs to

be down, and how to prepare, rather I will have somebody handing me an essay and a due date.

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