Tasi LeDonne

Writing 2

Revision Sheet Writing Project 1

After reviewing my first essay, it was difficult to choose what to edit. The biggest issue

concerning writing project 1 was my diction and formatting. On occasion, I would use slang

words rather than academic words. The use of these slang words weakened my overall argument

and made me less reliable as a source. For my revised paper, I changed the words I used

inappropriately and added in extra words where there needed to be clarification. I used words

like work and Speiser corrected it to pieces. I also added in page numbers to the top of the

essay because Speiser wrote on page three, page numbers? It was very difficult for me to do

major editing on this paper because Robert Speiser really enjoyed it. He said, Tasi, You

executed this genre analysis assignment superbly and your clear distinctions between the two

genres are well-examined. I see the growth and organization between the draft as well. After

seeing his positive feedback, I felt that the best editing for this paper would be to correct the

minor diction and formatting errors.

!
!
!
!
!
!
!
 2 of 7

Tasi LeDonne

Save the Sea

Dont you hate when you are having a nice relaxing day on the beach and all of a sudden

you are struck with a plastic bag or a leftover bag of chips brushes across your body while

swimming in the ocean? Even if you have not been to the beach, everyone is aware of the

presence of marine pollution. Marine pollution occurs when harmful chemicals, particles,

industrial, agricultural or residential waste, and or noise enter the ocean. If you are not a regular

beach goer or the beach is not accessible for you, you can still understand the urgency of how

harmful pollution can be to the ocean through different mediums of mass communication like

media or print.

Genres allow individuals to form a cooperative idea of categories for music, books, etc.

They enable the reader to group together different ideas to create this general understanding of

one topic. In Kerry Dirks essay, Navigating Genres, he wrote knowing what a genre is used

for can help people to accomplish goals Not only are genres beneficial to readers, they also

help the writer. It allows the writer to figure out how to convey the message they want to get

across and they can address the audience accordingly.

When examining the topic regarding the effects of pollution on the ocean today and how

that message is communicated, can be affected by genre. Two different types of genres can

impact the reader differently. The two genres that will be explored here are comic strips and

online news journals. These two genres both have a sufficient impact on the importance of

educating people about the effects of pollution in the ocean, but contrast in the manner the

message is being delivered, the amount of research and time needed to create the work, and the
 3 of 7

intended audience. The environmental issue of pollution in the ocean is a complex issue that

requires a variety of mediums to communicate the issue. Both comic strips and online news

articles have been used to address the issue of ocean pollution and other environmental issues.

A comic strip is a sequence of drawings arranged in particular way to display brief humor

or a narrative and are typically thought of as a frivolous and purely for entertainment. These

comics not only provide a sense of humor and narrative, but also include detailed drawings or

pictures for the readers. Often these drawings are either exaggerated or simplified for humorous

effect to draw in the readers. By doing so the reader can understand the importance of the

message being delivered quickly and in a typically witty manner, such as the effects of pollution

in the ocean. A comic created by Speed Bump displays an image of Princess Ariel, a popular

Disney character, covered in trash and the background is the ocean covered in filth. She says one

line to Prince Eric, What the #@** makes you think I could love a human? This visual allows

the reader to fully grasp the message that polluting the ocean is not okay and provides a visual

aid for the reader to see how bad pollution can be. Considering that Ariel is a mermaid, living in

the sea, it showcased how upset she was with humans for the pollution they caused. Although

there is fantasy and humor depicted by the comic strip, there is still truth to the message that is

trying to be portrayed. Since comic strips are a more simplified way to deliver certain messages

or stories, the intended audience ranges from elementary school students to the elderly.

An issue that arises with comic strips is that some readers might not understand the

references made in the comics or misinterpret the meaning. For example in the comic created by

Joel Pett, he shows a group of sharks staring at a sign that says Human Week. Some readers

would probably laugh at the comic and at the fact that sharks are having a meeting about this
 4 of 7

issue, but some might not understand the reference. The sign says Human Week to parallel

with the weeklong series shown on Discovery Channel known as Shark Week. It can be seen

how the reference made in this comic is like an inside joke between the reader and writer. Since

comic strips are humorous narratives, the readers may not find the message being portrayed as

powerful or meaningful as well. Although there are minor disadvantages to comic strips in

conveying the importance in an issue, they still can be beneficial.

A benefit that comes from a comic strip is that not too much background knowledge is

needed on the subject/topic that is being presented. Especially if the topic being discussed refers

to a widely discussed social, political, and ecological issue. In the same comic mentioned earlier

about Shark Week, the reader would understand the issue that is being presented since the

comic makes the issue understandable and accessible for anyone. The comic is straightforward,

brief and directly communicates the issue at hand by only incorporating the most important and

relevant details. Therefore, allowing the reader to get the message and not having to do intense

reading. Overall, comic strips are an easier, faster, and entertaining way to convey different

messages to a larger audience.

On the other hand, online news journals are more informative pieces that communicate to

readers about research results, news, academic analysis, or debate. Authors who write for this

genre are highly knowledgable on the issues or ideas that they are writing on. These specific

authors appeal to their audience because they use facts to persuade and inform their readers. By

using facts, the authors ability to convince the reader about the importance of an issue or topic

becomes easier or gives an accurate explanation surrounding the issue. An example of this is an

article published by National Geographic, named Marine Pollution written by Dr. Enric Sala
 5 of 7

that explains what water pollution is and the dangers of water pollution. It can be assumed that

Sala is an expert on this specific topic because he has earned a degree in aquatic science and has

the title Dr. making it known that he received his PhD in this field, therefore making the

journal entry a reliable source for readers. For the most part, articles published by companies,

such as National Geographic, shows pieces that are heavily based on research and facts. Dr. Sala

did intensive research in regards to the topic of marine pollution. He invested his time and

money for his piece and even went on expeditions to collect and compare his analysis of the

issue. These type of news journals attempt to report findings and leave out any room for strong

bias and opinions.

For the most part, online news journals are intended for high school students and adults

because the articles include a higher level of vocabulary and information that the reader must

comprehend in order to understand what is being conveyed. These journal entries are not meant

to simplify the issue of marine pollution but rather analyze it. The intended audience for online

news journals are already limited in age to adults and scholars but also limited in accessibility

and interests. It is most likely that to obtain this journal entry Marine Pollution a person must

have some interest in the topic to dive deeper into the issue. Although National Geographic is a

large company, if many visit their webpage they probably just look at the amazing photographs

instead of reading on the articles as an alternative. Online news journals are great for conveying

a message, but lack in appealing to a wide range of audience. The authors for many of these

online news journals must use different techniques interest in people to read what they published.

In order to captivate a potential reader, writers must also create clever or attention

catching headlines in order to spark the readers interest. Writers must use these catchy titles to
 6 of 7

invoke the reader to even begin reading the article. An example of a catchy title comes from a

New York Times article that says, Choking the Ocean with Plastic. The headline is important

because it not only informs what the article is going to be about, but it lures in the reader to keep

reading more. When you initially see the word choking it catches the readers attention

because of its relation to killing or death. Then it says the Ocean with Plastic and you think

how can the ocean choke on plastic? The headline is clever because it not only uses a powerful

word such as choke, but it makes you question on how is the ocean choking on plastic or is it the

ocean choking on plastic or an animal in the ocean choking. It engages the reader to think about

what the article could be referring to. When the reader reads this title it makes them want to

continue to read because they are interested in learning more. The headline plays an important

role in online news journals because it has to grab a readers attention and make them want to

read more and engage with the material.

Both comic strips and online news journals are effective methods in conveying the reader

the importance of understanding the effects of pollution on the ocean in different ways. The

comic strips provides a light hearted and funny way to convey the issue by using colorful

pictures and funny narratives. That allows the reader to engage with the comic and fully

understand the message that is being delivered since it is simplified. While on the other hand

online news journalisms use concrete details and facts to convey the issue. That allows the reader

to believe that what is being written is the truth, since the journal entries come from authors with

a background knowledge on the topic being delivered. It can be shown that certain genres, such

as comic strips and online news journals are successful in conveying the importance of marine

pollution.
 7 of 7

Work Cited:

Petts Joel, Human Week. Comic Strip. 17 August 2012. Web

http://www.cartoonistgroup.com/store/add.php?iid=86509

!
Bump Speed, comic strip. 02 September 2014. Web

http://www.cartoonistgroup.com/store/add.php?iid=115624

!
Sala Enric, Marine Pollution. National Geographic, 15 May 2013.

http://ocean.nationalgeographic.com/ocean/explore/pristine-seas/critical-issues-marine-pollution/

!
Moore J. Charles, Choking the Ocean With Plastic. New York Times., 26 August 2014.

https://www.nytimes.com/2014/08/26/opinion/choking-the-oceans-with-plastic.html?_r=1

!
!