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A Panda

The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife manual and tosses it over
his shoulder
A panda walks into a caf.
Why?"
The waiter turns to the relevant entry and, sure enough, finds an
explanation.
asks the confused waiter, as the panda makes towards the exit.
.
"I'm a panda," he says at the door.
"Look it up."
"Panda. Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China.

He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun and fires two shots in the
air. "

Eats, shoots and leaves." Knock Knock


A panda walks into a caf. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun
and fires two shots in the air. "Why?" asks the confused waiter, as the panda
makes towards the exit. The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife
manual and tosses it over his shoulder. "I'm a panda," he says at the door.
"Look it up." The waiter turns to the relevant entry and, sure enough, finds
an explanation. "Panda. Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to
China. Eats, shoots and leaves." Knock Knock

source: http://www.jokes4us.com/miscellaneousjokes/schooljokes/grammar
jokes.html
Punctuate
"A woman, without her man, is nothing"
A teacher writes on a chalkboard the sentence:
The teacher asks the girls to punctuate it and they write:
"A woman: without her, man is nothing" .
"A woman without her man is nothing"
The teacher then asks the boys to punctuate it properly, and they all write:
Punctuate
A teacher writes on a chalkboard the sentence: "A woman without her man
is
nothing" The teacher then asks the boys to punctuate it properly, and they all
write: "A woman, without her man, is nothing" The teacher asks the girls to
punctuate it and they write: "A woman: without her, man is nothing"

source: http://www.jokes4us.com/miscellaneousjokes/schooljokes/grammar
jokes.html
A man asks a farmer near a field,
The farmer says,
Sure, go right ahead.
I have to catch the 4:23 train.
And if my bull sees you, youll even catch the 4:11 one.

Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it?
You see,
A man asks a farmer near a field, Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed
your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.

The farmer says, Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, youll even
catch the 4:11 one.

More jokes: http://www.short-funny.com/#ixzz4cAy5X2WS


Paul: I is the...
T. You must say "I am" not "I is."
John: All right. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet
Teacher: No, Paul
Teacher: Paul. Give me a sentence beginning with "I".
Teacher: Paul. Give me a sentence beginning with "I".
Paul: I is the...
Teacher: No, Paul . You must say "I am" not "I is."
John: All right. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.

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