Escolar Documentos
Profissional Documentos
Cultura Documentos
Although we grew up knowing God and going to mass I didn’t have that
intimate relationship with the Lord. I became a seminarian when I was in high
school and there my knowledge not only of the existence of God but also
about our religion increases. Although I was sent out after almost 2 years
because of some “kalokohan” I still treasure my time inside because it
thought me the importance of prayer. It was there where I learned how to
pray the rosary among others.
But it was in the youth camp where my parents who are members of CFC in
Negros invited us to join where I really experience the presence and reality of
the Lord. During the entire camp I had this arrogance that I already know
what they are talking about having studied in the seminary but one thing I
notice the speakers where not talking about a God that is just sitting in the
throne and punishing us for every fault we commit but rather they are
sharing their experience with Jesus like they are the best of friends. Christ
was not just in their mind but was real in their hearts.
During the Baptism night when the speaker ask us to pray for the spiritual
gifts that we want and need and people where praying over the other
participants and most of them started crying I said “ang OA naman”. I even
thought maybe they are crying because the prayer was too long. My prayer
that night change my life forever instead for asking for the gifts I made a deal
with God, I said I don’t want to waste time in attending camps or seminars or
reading and studying about Him only to find out when I’m dead that HE
doesn’t exist. So I ask him to prove to me that night that He is for real, and to
my great and very pleasant surprise He manifested to me even if I was
resisting, His presence and it was that moment that I said ok I will follow you.
It took me 9 years to finish college after going from one school to another.
One time I told God that whether I finish or not that he will just allow me to
serve Him. I really don’t have anything to boast that I have given up a lot to
serve. My service is my “thank you” to the Lord for all the love He gave me.
I’m just truly grateful. I feel more liberated knowing that I’m serving without
thinking of the cost or what I left behind. We are not a rich family but we are
blessed to have wonderful and very supportive parents. They are very much
instrumental in bringing us closer to God. And so when we (3 brothers)
decided to go fulltime for the Lord they never made us feel that we have to
give back anything to the family.
I was failing my subjects, hanging around and drinking with my friends, not
attending school all the time, going home late or shall I say early morning but
I guess most of the things I did back then was normal for a lot of young
people. But the reason why I was behaving this way and doing the things I
was doing was that I wanted to project an image that I was a different person
from my brother. My insecurities was growing inside me and I was having a
difficult time handling it. Sometimes I would go for 3 days just feeling like the
world around me is moving and mine is not. Crying myself to sleep, to a point
where I thought I was really going crazy.
When you are nursing an insecurity you really cannot make a logical or a
good decision because it’s always about you.