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by Paul Emmerson
Introduction
Set it for homework? Not a bad idea, if they will do it. But homework is
not ideal: the motivation and close personalized monitoring by a teacher
circulating and supporting is difficult to reproduce at home. I could perfectly
well do yoga at home, but I dont I go to a class.
Of course, with report writing you can (and should) go in at the deep
end at some point. This means getting the students to write first, and then
seeing where the problems are afterwards. Ive never had any success asking
students to think in the abstract of a typical report they have to write: they
lack a context, specific background information, specific facts and figures, the
specific company report structure that they have to follow, etc. But if your
student does have a particular report to work on in real life, or can show you
one already written, then thats great and you are very lucky. Otherwise, an
easy option is to get them to write a report off the back of a role-play: write a
summary for your boss who wasnt at the meeting. But Im not concerned
with a Deep End approach in this article. I want Input!!
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keep all my examples at Upper Intermediate (B2) level. Intermediate (B1) is
probably too low to do serious work on report writing, and Advanced (C1)
students are too thin on the ground in our classes.
All through this article Ive referred to IELTS Academic Writing, because
the input there is mostly relevant to business report writing. My sources here
are mainly Focus on IELTS by Sue OConnell and Ready For IELTS by Sam
McCarter. I have also looked through all the usual multi-level Business English
coursebooks (the ones you know and love) but I cant really find a proper
treatment of input language for report writing. And finally, specialized BE
books like Collins English for Business: Writing are woefully short on Input
language for reports systematically presented and practiced.
1 Formal style
Notice how the first phrase each time would be quite okay in normal
speech, or an email, and carries 100% of the meaning. But somehow these
first phrases sound completely inappropriate for the context of a report. In a
presentation or a meeting either choice might be okay, depending on the
formality of the occasion.
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Before we continue, wed better just ask: are the formal alternatives
worth teaching? If you are a supporter of BELF (Business English as a Lingua
Franca) you presumably answer no. After all, those on the left carry 100% of
the meaning and would be 100% understood in an international context with
many non-native speakers of English present. But every single BE learner I have
taught over the years wants to know the formal version (or something like it),
and avidly writes it down in their notes. This is not because of a false
consciousness due to the imperialistic nature of native speaker English. It is to
do with presenting an image of yourself as an educated person. It is to do with
using serious language, not everyday language, to make your ideas sound
important and not easily dismissed. The impact on the reader, not meaning, is
paramount1.
1
Where ELF goes wrong is that it completely fails to make a distinction between accuracy (which often doesnt
need correcting, I agree) and complexity (which students want and need and love to be taught, and allows them
to come closer in English to the meaning and style they would use in their own language).
2
Internet link to download the PDF of the annual report is: http://phx.corporate-
ir.net/External.File?item=UGFyZW50SUQ9MTY5MTkzfENoaWxkSUQ9LTF8VHlwZT0z&t=1
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Example 2: original text from HP Annual Report
Fiscal 2013 is going to be a fix-and-rebuild year as we focus on working
through the anticipated disruptions expected to accompany the
organizational changes we made in fiscal 2012. We will continue to
implement our cost-reduction and operational initiatives, make
investments in our business particularly in tools, systems, processes,
and instrumentation and maintain our focus on disciplined capital
allocation. We will also continue to drive product innovation in our core
markets; improve our commercialization strategy with a focus on cloud
computing, security, and information optimization; and rebuild our go-
to-market capability.
This formal style is a major language area, and one that is very difficult
to systematize and then present for teaching purposes. Here is the beginnings
of a list, all single word examples:
Like everything else, its never black and white some simpler language
is fine, particularly for passages of text where the ideas themselves are
straightforward and not that important. But use a little of the formal
alternatives and youll undoubtedly impress, persuade, and be taken more
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seriously. How can we build up a resource bank of examples like those
above? Can you add to the list above with some examples of your own?
Please email me if you can add substantially to this list with good, high
frequency examples!
This exercise type strikes me as being very useful. But again its random,
one-off examples. Can we systematize this for teaching purposes? Any ideas?
a) Describing an object
b) Describing a process
c) Definition
d) Comparison and Contrast
e) Cause and Effect
f) Change and Development
g) Problem and Solution
h) Argument and Persuasion
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Lets take these one by one. Functions a) and b) I rule out as not being
relevant to business report writing. I think that b) Describing a process is
extremely low frequency in business reports, and is just sneaked in to BE
coursebooks by editors as a context for teaching the passive. For more of my
thoughts on the passive, see section #13 below. Function c) Definition I dont
understand and I cant find any examples for it. I dont think its relevant.
X is
nearly/just under/about/approximately/just over/more than
25%/half/twice/three times
as expensive as Y.
Speech
Its a little more expensive
Its a lot more expensive
Report writing
Its slightly/relatively/somewhat/significantly/considerably more expensive
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time phrases3. Put it all together and we hope that students can produce
things like Sales have improved significantly over the last two quarters.
3
On the topic of verb tenses, I notice that in the HP annual report Meg Whitman uses a lot of present perfects,
and she (an American) uses them exactly as I (a Brit) would. They are all the present result of a past action. Is it
the case that in writing Americans use the present perfect more often?
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3 Paragraph structure
4 Linking words
We know this one well, its important, and its in our BE books. One of
the IELTS books I am looking at calls these words logical links to emphasize
their use for cohesion.
In addition/Furthermore/As well as
However/Even so/Nevertheless
In contrast/On the other hand/While/Whereas
In spite of (that)/Despite (that)
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In fact/Actually/As a matter of fact
For example/including/such as/e.g.
In other words/That is to say/i.e.
Because/Because of/Since/Due to
Therefore/As a result/For this reason
To/In order to
In general/Typically, As a rule
Firstly/Then/At this stage/The next step is/Finally/Looking ahead
When/Before/While/During/Later/Meanwhile
To summarize/To sum up/Overall/On balance/In conclusion
The commentary here is that By using nouns (eg agreement) rather than
verbs (eg agree) actions are turned into abstract concepts. Personal subjects
(eg Most people) are often removed, making academic writing more
impersonal and formal. I agree.
My IELTS book introduces what it calls general nouns that are a way of
briefly summarizing information. They help to avoid repetition and link a text
together. Examples are: activity, benefit, change, device, effect, issue,
problem, reason, result, purpose, trend and type. Interesting idea Ive never
come across it before.
Next, we have noun phrases with two, three or four nouns all together.
German speakers have no problem here (we got it from them). Others do.
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director with responsibility for finance finance director
forecast for growth growth forecast
project for infrastructure in the EU EU infrastructure project
businesses that are starting up business start-ups
document for shipping when we export export shipping document
regulations to improve safety safety regulations
My IELTS book also points out the importance of noun phrases with of.
Examples here might include: point of (view); rate of (change); cost of
(production); quality of (life); process of (ongoing improvement); development
of (the business); one of the most important (issues); the main aim of (this
report)
Over the past decade, the way people communicate has changed a lot.
This would have carried 100% of the meaning. Instead, the writer wrote:
Over the past decade, the way people communicate has undergone a
profound transformation.
Here are some very easy (Intermediate level) ways to achieve this style.
They are all examples of what a linguist would call modality:
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This suggests that it will be more expensive.
It tends to be more expensive when
Adjective phrases to show degrees of probability
It is certain/likely that it will be more expensive.
It is certain/likely to be more expensive.
Quantifiers to show degrees of generality
all, the majority of, most, many, some, a small number of, certain
Adverbs to show degrees of frequency
always, often, sometimes, rarely, never
Lexical phrases to show degrees of truth
Typically, In some respects, Up to a point, To a limited degree/extent,
To some degree/extent, To a large degree/extent
7 Substitution
Often in a report the same ideas are repeated several times. Students
need to be encouraged to vary their language to produce an interesting piece
of writing. This is where we need rise and increase as well as just go up, where
we need alternatives and options as well as possibilities, where we need a half
as well as 50%, where we need revenue as well as turnover.
issue
adj+N important big, central, critical, crucial, fundamental,
important, key, main, major, pressing, real, serious
that people feel strongly about burning, contentious, controversial,
divisive, emotive, sensitive
complicated complex, complicated, difficult, problematic
v+N deal with an issue address, approach, confront, deal with, face,
handle, tackle
settle an issue decide, overcome, resolve, settle, solve
discuss or investigate an issue analyze, consider, cover, discuss,
examine, explore, investigate, look at, outline, research
This is not really an Input area like the others, because it is L1-specific.
And as a teacher of mixed nationality groups I am not best placed to comment.
What I can say is that when I see something that is difficult for me to read and
understand I ask the student if they are translating from their own language,
and they nearly always say yes. These L1 direct translations are always over-
4
Collocation dictionaries I know only of the Macmillan and Oxford ones havent made it online yet.
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complex. In English report writing, sentences are short, and without too many
embedded clauses and sub-clauses.
Looking Ahead
While we have faced some big challenges, we also see some big
opportunities ahead, and we are well positioned to take advantage of those
opportunities with our remarkable set of assets and strengths.
Our unparalleled scale and distribution allows us to reach customers and
partners in any corner of the globe at the best possible price. Our brand is
trusted by customers around the world. We have talented and resilient
employees that are committed to our customers, and a culture of great
engineering and innovation.
Above all, we have an incredibly loyal group of customers and partners who
want our company to succeed. Over the years, these customers have made
enormous investments in HPs technology, and they need us to continue to
provide solutions for todays new style of IT.
This new style of IT promises lower costs, simplicity, and speed. Driven by
cloud, mobility, and big data, it is changing how technology is consumed
and delivered, and how end users engage with it. For organizations around
the world, this new style of IT has the potential to reshape the competitive
landscape by lowering barriers of entry in all industries.
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First: For important ideas use vocabulary that gives a serious, formal
style.
Second: At the same time keep your sentence and paragraph
structure short and simple.
Difficult? Well, nobody said it would be easy. And dont for one minute
think that native speakers are at an advantage here. I can absolutely assure
you after teaching English for 22 years that an Advanced (C1) level learner of
English studying for IELTS or CAE can write English every bit as impressive (to
the reader) as a UK university student.
10 Relative clauses
I think students can already handle defining relative clauses quite well at
Upper Intermediate level (if they have them in L1). Note how educated English
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often uses a noun phrase (or adjective + noun phrase) rather than a defining
relative clause:
One area that could be covered at UI level is leaving out the relative
pronoun and instead expressing the same idea as an ing clause or a passive
verb form:
There are several issues that arise from the increased costs.
There are several issues arising from the increased costs.
Our brand does not have the same market position as those that are sold
in supermarkets.
Our brand does not have the same market position as those sold in
supermarkets.
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In all the examples in this section I think the original unreformulated
version is okay, and the reformulated version just gives a final polish to the
style. Thats why I have relative clauses down here at #10. In all honesty I
cannot think of many occasions when a students writing has screamed out
incorrect because of failure to use relative clauses correctly. Feel free to
disagree, but we do have to prioritize on a time-limited course.
Example 1 (original)
A higher proportion of people over 65 use this type of product than
people aged 18-30.
Example 1 (reformulated)
A higher proportion of people over 65 use this type of product than those
aged 18-30.
Example 2 (original)
Whereas only 48% of customers said that they ordered online in 2008,
more than 80% said that they ordered online in 2012.
Example 2 (reformulated)
Whereas only 48% of customers said they ordered online in 2008, more
than 80% said that they did so in 2012.
Example 3 (original)
Going forward, we will probably have to open an office in Dubai if we
want to develop our business in the Middle East. Developing our business
in this way will give us many new opportunities.
Example 3 (reformulated)
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Going forward, we will probably have to open an office in Dubai if we
want to develop our business in the Middle East. Such development will
give us many new opportunities.
12 Dependent prepositions
I find that when I ask students which grammar areas they want to revise,
prepositions and verb tenses come out top of the list. Prepositions are
horrible to teach and to learn (because there are no rules and you just have to
memorize them) but theres no avoiding them. I like the way that my IELTS
book presents this language area as word building rather than grammar at
least it makes it sound a little more useful!
13 Passives
First let me say how few passives I find in real-life reports. Taking the
three-page Introduction to the HP annual report I referred to earlier, I can find
only one: Our brand is trusted by customers around the world.
Now lets turn to the treatment of the passive in ELT books. Here is an
extract from the IELTS book I am looking at:
And here is the explanation of the passive from the same book:
Using the passive places the emphasis on the action rather than on the
agent that does the action.
Sorry. I beg to differ. I think the action kill has exactly equal emphasis in
both sentences. I think that emphasis in a sentence depends on what is
interesting or new or surprising, and also on what comes first. I think that the
passive is used simply to switch something to first position, often for reasons
of cohesion. Take a look at this example I just made up:
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1 No passive
This will involve committing additional resources to our social media
presence, and we should use these resources to develop our Facebook
and LinkedIn pages rather than our Twitter page.
2 Use of passive
This will involve committing additional resources to our social media
presence, and these resources should be used to develop our Facebook
and LinkedIn pages rather than our Twitter page.
Does the use of the passive in the second example give more emphasis
to the action use? Hardly. As I said, I dont believe that stuff about passives
putting the emphasis on the action (except in the very specialized and
extremely low-frequency case of describing a process). I think that the passive
is used in example 2 above for reasons of cohesion: beginning the second
clause with these resources refers back to additional resources in the first
clause. There also seems to be a small effect of rhetoric: in this case the
repetition of resources is more noticeable in the second example.
Generally, the slightly greater cohesion and slight rhetorical effect make
example 2 a little more dramatic and engaging. Example 1, without the passive,
is absolutely fine. Its just a bit flat.
Other false trails with the passive include the idea that It is
recommended that is more typical of reports than I recommend . This is
meant to be because it is more formal. Well, it certainly is more formal, but it
sounds to me like the English of a bygone age. In a modern business report, I
think the writer would say I recommend. But I do think that It constructions like
the following are worth teaching:
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Exercises that teach collocation as a subject in itself are familiar to us:
Write each key word in the box next to the group of words below it regularly
combines with. Then a follow-up exercise using some of the word partners in
sentences. Now, a coursebook exercise such as this will often be based on key
words written down on the page in a previously studied text, and so have a
very concrete context. The real-life report writer doesnt begin like this. They
begin with a context and purpose in their heads, some heterogeneous
information in their heads, a blank screen and a deadline.
By the way, while were thinking lexically, notice that the buzz phrases
at the end of #15 below are all collocations and fixed expressions. I do think
that using some of these, appropriate to the business that the student is in, will
add weight and gravitas to a report. They will help to achieve the serious,
formal style that we want. The problem is to collect them and systematize
them for reference and teaching.
Lets take some examples. First, repetition. Repetition can add interest.
Repetition can add impact. Repetition can make your writing more persuasive.
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Okay, Im sure you spotted the deliberate repetition of the word
Repetition. But did you spot the other common rhetorical device? Its called
the rule of three and its where you give three similar structures rather than
two or four. This toaster has extra lift for small items, a crumb tray that slides
in and out, and is very good value for money. Try saying just two of those, or
adding a fourth, and it loses impact.
Besides repetition and the rule of three there are other examples of
rhetoric in writing, all very important for trying to persuade people. One would
be the deliberate use of contrast: We need high safety at low cost / We need
global reach with a local presence.
Also under rhetoric I would include the use of buzz phrases. There is a
very fine line between convincing buzz phrases and unconvincing clichs. But I
think I know the good ones when I see them. Im looking at the first part of the
HP annual report again (The Year in Review section) and I would identify the
following as buzz phrases worth noticing in class. I think they all help to make
an argument sound persuasive, even if the underlying idea is bland and
obvious. Interestingly, all except three are verb + noun collocations.
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to bring costs in line with revenue scalable solutions
to bring focus back to the business to see big opportunities ahead
to build the foundation for sth. to streamline the company
to empower and enable sales teams strong leadership team
to face a challenge to tackle issues
to implement a series of changes to take steps to refocus our efforts
macroeconomic challenges
to map out a journey
To my mind the above help to strike a serious, formal note, and are not
the same as unconvincing clichs like its a win-win situation, lets think outside
of the box, the customer is always right, we need a paradigm shift in our
thinking, in todays highly competitive marketplace, etc.
If inflation rose, the central bank would be forced to raise interest rates,
and that would put up the monthly repayments on our bank loan. We might
have to hedge against that risk.
If we delayed the product launch by a month, that would have a knock-
on effect to our channel partners. They are expecting stock by the date we
announced previously and are already talking to end-users about delivery
times.
Students love them. We love them. But just how much meaning do they
carry? When you read the examples above, are you interested in the content
as carried by the vocabulary, or the low probability as carried by the 2nd
conditional?
I believe that 2nd conditionals often pass right over the heads of listeners
and readers. Yes, they can get noticed in speech if emphasized with intonation.
But the main way to communicate low probability is to use a phrase that
communicates low probability, like Its not very likely but if . Having done
this, the structure that follows can happily be a 1st conditional one and
absolutely no-one will notice.
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3rd conditionals are perhaps useful for report writing, for the particular
context of analyzing what went wrong. But here I believe that the result in the
present (mixed conditional) form is more common and useful than the classic
form. So I believe that If we had done that, they wouldnt have done the other
is not really all that common. More common is If we had done that, they would
now do/be doing the other.
Conclusion
I think that report writing is a very under-analyzed area in ELT and very
under-practiced in coursebooks. All too often the students are left with a
context to write about and a model report at the back of the book to follow,
but no systematic language to implement that they have built up stage by
stage. They are left unsupported in a way that they are not for other
communication skills like meetings, telephoning, presentations, writing emails
etc.
In this white paper I have tried to put that right. I have drawn together
some familiar language areas, introduced some unfamiliar ones, and de-
emphasized some old favourites. The sixteen areas (or fifteen if we exclude
avoiding L1 translations) represent a body of language that can be
systematically presented and practiced, and then slowly combined. This
analysis draws to some extent on the IELTS Academic Writing syllabus.
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