Leading Through Conflict

Leading Through Conflict
Connecting, Collaborating, and Innovating

Across Generations
Workshop and Retreat

Presented by
Carolann Wolfgang, PhD
and
Marilyn Monda, MA, MBB
In partnership with the ASQ HD&L Division and

2016 Monda Consulting LLC and
the Trinidad Five Star Quality and Justice Associates What you
Leading cant Conflict
through do with aRetreat
August
t-Test
March 2016 1
HD&L Division and our Leadership Body of
Knowledge (BOK)
Our Vision HD&L BOK for Leadership
To be the global community of choice The Leadership Body of Knowledge (BOK)
for everyone by making human consists of the resources related to topics
potential an organizational and we have found to be essential to our
personal priority. personal pursuit of Leadership excellence.
Our Mission The BOK topics include

Visioning Change Management
To enrich the personal and
professional lives of our membership, Communication Conflict Management
and the global community, to triumph Motivation Coaching/Mentoring

over current and future challenges. Systems Thinking Wellness
Strategic Planning Theories of Leadership
Find out more at:
http://www.asqhdandl.org/
To become a member, contact ASQ

Customer Care
Leading through Conflict Retreat
August 2016 2
About Dr. Carolann Wolfgang and Marilyn
Monda, MA, MBB
Carolann has a BA (honors) in Geology from the University of Pennsylvania and a PhD in Natural
Resource Management from The Australian National University. She began her conflict exploration
journey dealing with water resources conflicts during her PhD. Since then she has worked
internationally in the Caribbean, Australia, and Europe with a variety of organizations.
Carolanns passion is her long-standing work as an organizational coach and advisor. As a cross-
disciplinary practitioner she guides organizations into a more integrated approach to their operational
programs and strategic planning efforts; saving money, time and increasing the benefits. Expert in
mediation, coaching, and meeting facilitation, her style is collaborative and proactive while
implementing change and continual improvement. Her strong values for self-development guide her
commitment to individuals who strive to become better leaders.
Marilyn has an MA in Behavioral Statistics (triple major in Psychology, Statistics and Computer Science)
from Baylor University. Her BA is in Experimental Psychology from San Diego State University. She is a
Certified Master Black Belt (GE) and a Certified Change Agent Level 2 (Conner Partners).
As a Quality professional for over 30 years and a psychologist and statistician by training Marilyn has
spent her career fostering quality improvements in both the public and private sectors and in a variety
of industries. Her practice focuses on leading across generations to achieve success in implementing
process improvements. Facilitating innovative solutions to thorny problems has resulted in millions in
savings and increased productivity for her clients. Marilyns passion for learning and fun at work is
central to her philosophy of life. She enjoys working with and training quality professionals in advanced
process improvement skills, such as conflict management, transactional rapid results kaizens, and how
to apply the system of profound knowledge as taught by W. E. Deming

August 2016 3
Agenda for today
What are the generations and how do they differ?
What are some typical generational stereotypes and which ones are real?
What can you do about generational conflicts?
What is conflict?
Understand some Conflict models and how to work within them
How do you lead through conflict?
What does the Leading through Workplace Conflict retreat offer?
Do you want to attend the inaugural offering of Leading through

Workplace Conflict?

August 2016 4
Poll: What generation are you?
Generation Z (<22)
Millennials (23-35)
Generation X (36-51)
Boomers (52-70)
Silent (71-88)
Greatest (89-101)

August 2016 5
Generational profiles
Generations Defined
Generation Z (<22)
Millennials (23-35)
Generation X (36-51)
Boomers (52-70)
Silent (71-88)
Greatest (89-101)

August 2016 6
What do you know about generational traits?
Because all the peoples of the world are

part of one electronically based,
intercommunicating network, young
people everywhere share a kind of
experience that none of the elders ever
had. . . . This break between generations
is wholly new: it is planetary and
universal.
Cultural anthropologist Margaret Mead,

1970

August 2016 7
Poll: Are you experiencing generational issues?
Raise your hand if you have seen one or more of these issues in your
workplace
Feedback, Communication Styles and
Language
Work/Life Balance
Business Etiquette
Dress and Grooming
Authority: Leadership vs Hierarchy
Dismissive attitudes
Work Hours
A study of 2500 execs found a quarter of them consider intergenerational

conflict to be a top risk to the future of their business Weiner and Rash, 2016

August 2016 8
Do the stereotypes stand?
Baby Boomers are out of touch and cut off from what is happening in the world
FALSE
Millennials want more interesting work
FALSE
Millennials want more work-life balance
SOMEWHAT TRUE
Millennials want more purpose at work
TRUE
Gen Xers are more ambitious
FALSE
Millennials are less positive at work
FALSE
Millennials are disengaged
FALSE
Baby Boomers are more independent and need less supervision
FALSE
Theyre completely different from us at that age
FALSE

August 2016 9
There are indeed generational differences, but they
may not be what you think

August 2016 10
How do I begin to solve generational conflicts?
You begin by offering yourself a chance to commit to do it
Solving Generational Conflict means a personal commitment to

engage in the right dialogue to find a creative, sincere solution
that is better than what either party could come up with on
their own and allows parties to either build greater rapport or
to achieve a relationship that meets both interests.

August 2016 11
Learning about conflict and executing dialogue
differently
Poll: What is your experience with conflict training and negotiation?
1. You CAN learn how to better deal with conflict
2. You learn to execute dialogue differently by training, experiencing, and

practicing need all three as part of the roadmap (thats why this skill is
similar to leadership)
3. How you deal with generational conflicts is the same as how you deal with
any conflict

August 2016 12
Can we actually move past stereotypes we have
ingrained in us? YES
1. Understand generational differences and the stereotypes and options you

have to engage in conflict
2. Commit to not having stereotypes impact your workplace experience,

making a difference for the people you work with and supervise
3. Learn conflict styles and how you personally can grow and gain insight
about yourself
4. Build your roadmap
5. Prep and Respond with a calm plan when generational issues (or any
conflict situation) impact your team
6. Practice conflict and collaborative negotiation tools

August 2016 13
Common Ground
Generations Defined Commonalities

Generation Z (<22) Want interesting work or something
to do
Millennials (23-35)
Want to be happy
Generation X (36-51) Want to be financially independent;
have enough money for what they
Boomers (52-70)
need
Silent (71-88) Want a fun, thriving environment
Greatest (89-101) Want opportunity
Want to be engaged somehow

August 2016 14
What does Leading through Conflict mean?
We call this approach leading through conflict because it is

much more than resolving conflict. It is:
Knowing your options to have the type of discussion that can

defuse an issue/stereotype just enough so that both can find
your interests
About helping you through complexity in the workplace
Gaining flexibility for more and better problem solving in the

future
Positive and life-affirming for not only you but others around
you Leading through Conflict Retreat
August 2016 15
Understanding Individuals in Conflict
How conflict effects us:
Swirl of emotions
Increases stress, anxiety
Less productivity
Health issues
Loss of perspective
Loss of feeling of support/community
Greater errors, accidents, poorer decisions
We feel helpless
This easily turns into a downward spiral

August 2016 16
Understanding Individuals in Conflict Using
Process Thinking
Getting through conflict is a process with specific steps
There are a range of approaches, with varying degrees of engagement,

its a continuum of options from high engagement to very low
engagement
Preventing conflict, or negotiating collaboratively contains high
engagement. Thats one side of the continuum. Going to court is low
engagement and thats on the other side
The start of the process is always self awareness/the recognition
thats the start of your roadmap
There are intractable conflicts or conflicts you choose not to be
involved with (thats different from just stewing over a current
conflict)

August 2016 17
Understanding Individuals in Conflict Using
Process Thinking
The process foundation we purport is characterized by

interest based
The reality is actually NOT a zero sum game

All of your interests are important to the process
Interests are different than you may initially believe for
yourself, and they are not the same as positions you take
up

August 2016 18
Lets Generate Innovation!
Innovation def. #1 origination; #2 new idea or method. Conflict can be

the seed of your origination; it can be the fuel for your new idea or method
Its not about trying to avoid or placate or even move beyond conflict to
get to a place of innovation or creativity
Once your interests are out there and agreed upon, its time to generate options and ways
forward
We suggest diving in and exploring the conflict to grab the potential to

innovate
In council practice this is known as turning into the skid
Being a human explorer in the conflict holds passion and practicality and is
positive

August 2016 19
Extending these Concepts to Teams
We can extend what we learn with individual conflict and adapt to a team
Why forming, storming, norming, performing doesnt work (we all know this
model, but it can hinder human exploration through conflict)
Our teaching framework uses Lencionis work, specifically dysfunctions of teams
Lencioni, Patrick 2002, The Five

Dysfunctions of a Team, Jossey-Bass,
San Francisco, CA
the table group

August 2016 20
Typical Frustrations when Teams Cant Solve
Conflicts
A loss of energy or enthusiasm
A sense of helplessness
Cynicism and mistrust
Interpersonal attacks
Lots of finger pointing at top management and the rest of the organization
Listless, unconstructive, and one-sided discussions without candor
Taken from Katzenbach, Jon R. and Douglas K. Smith 2003. The Wisdom of Teams, McKinsey & Company, New
York, NY.

August 2016 21
The power of practice
It all seems easy until you have to actually do it! The majority of the retreat is
aimed at practicing on real generational and work related issues
Demonstrative role play by the instructors
Group practice and reinforcement of conflict

resolution/negotiation/mediation skills
Small group role play practice on real conflict issues
Personal reflection and journaling at regular intervals
Informal interactions, networking and fun get-togethers
Optional post course practice deepening session

August 2016 22
Leading Through Conflict Retreat Inaugural Session
- Only 20 Slots!
Right now you have the first opportunity to join us. Were offering the LTC to our ASQ
colleagues first and at a deeply reduced cost, limited to 20 participants!
Well Researched Content

This program is designed around the latest research in Generational theory,
Tested Negotiation Processes, and Conflict Management Tools and Techniques
Practical, Highly Interactive Approach and Specific Conflict Management Skills

There will be 1.5 days of concentrated learning and practice including individual,
dyad, and group exercises aimed at providing these benefits and more
Self assessments, workbooks, worksheets, tools and a roadmap through conflict for
you to take away after the workshop
Complementary Webinars and Consulting

You will also get to extend your learning past the retreat at no extra cost!
Included in the registration fee are 3 post-workshop webinars on selected
generational and conflict management topics. During these webinars we will also
answer questions and address conflict situations you may be experiencing

August 2016 23
Retreat benefits
Understand the latest research on generational stereotypes

Discover and leverage your own conflict style
Learn the value of conflict how to turn conflict into innovation
Use conflict exploration techniques on your own conflicts
Learn to turn team conflicts into productive discussions
Feel confident in creating a plan to address any conflict in a calm,
collaborative manner
Learn techniques for building intergenerational trust
Find out how to resolve long term conflict issues

August 2016 24
Leading Through Conflict Retreat
- Overview
Prep: Introductory Webinar; Pre-reads; Pre-Course Worksheets to

explore your expectations, intent and conflict issues
Day One, A.M. Roadmap through Conflict; Your Personal Conflict style;
Value out of Conflict; Generational Stereotypes; Unspoken Assumptions
Day One, P.M. Dispute resolution models, processes and skills;

Demonstrations and Facilitated Practice in groups and pairs; Resolving
YOUR conflict challenges
Team Dinner: Networking, Informal review of Day One, Have fun!
Day Two, A.M. Demonstrations and Facilitated Practice in groups and

pairs; Continuing to resolve YOUR conflict challenges; Leading through
Conflict with Teams
Monthly webinars (3 over 3 months). Topics to be determined according

to participant interest.
August 2016 25
Leading Through Workplace Conflict Retreat
Deepening the Practice
As a special benefit we will also be offering 10 slots in our

Deepening The Practice session to directly follow the retreat on the
second afternoon.
For an small additional fee you will have the opportunity to
Design your own personal roadmap for leading through conflict

Plan how to deepen your own practice after you leave the retreat
Leverage one-on-one coaching with Carolann and Marilyn
Please do take advantage of this opportunity to catapult your growth

August 2016 26
How to register
Check the Brochure provided with this webinar for pricing and
details
Please note this first offering is in Trinidad, January 27-28!
Contact mmonda@mondaconsulting.net or
Carolwolfgang@gmail.com if you are interested in the retreat,
but cant make it to Trinidad in January!
Go to ASQ HD&L website http://asqhdandl.org/ltc.html

August 2016 27
You can do this!
Marilyn and Carolann want to inspire you to a new way to

define conflict, to explore and appreciate the value that
comes from conflict, and to see the potential that cross-
generational dialogues can offer you in the workplace, in the
community, and to your family.
Please join us in our Inaugural Workshop and Retreat!

August 2016 28
Thank you!
Questions?
Survey

August 2016 29

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Leading Through Conflict

Connecting, Collaborating, and Innovating

Workshop and Retreat

In partnership with the ASQ HD&L Division and

Our Mission The BOK topics include

and the global community, to triumph Motivation Coaching/Mentoring

To become a member, contact ASQ

Leading through Conflict Retreat

What are the generations and how do they differ?

What can you do about generational conflicts?

Understand some Conflict models and how to work within them

How do you lead through conflict?

What does the Leading through Workplace Conflict retreat offer?

Do you want to attend the inaugural offering of Leading through

Leading through Conflict Retreat

Leading through Conflict Retreat

Leading through Conflict Retreat

Because all the peoples of the world are

Cultural anthropologist Margaret Mead,

Leading through Conflict Retreat

A study of 2500 execs found a quarter of them consider intergenerational

Leading through Conflict Retreat

Leading through Conflict Retreat

Leading through Conflict Retreat

You begin by offering yourself a chance to commit to do it

Solving Generational Conflict means a personal commitment to

Leading through Conflict Retreat

Poll: What is your experience with conflict training and negotiation?

1. You CAN learn how to better deal with conflict

2. You learn to execute dialogue differently by training, experiencing, and

Leading through Conflict Retreat

1. Understand generational differences and the stereotypes and options you

2. Commit to not having stereotypes impact your workplace experience,

4. Build your roadmap

6. Practice conflict and collaborative negotiation tools

Leading through Conflict Retreat

Generations Defined Commonalities

Greatest (89-101) Want opportunity

Want to be engaged somehow

We call this approach leading through conflict because it is

Knowing your options to have the type of discussion that can

About helping you through complexity in the workplace

Gaining flexibility for more and better problem solving in the

How conflict effects us:

This easily turns into a downward spiral

Leading through Conflict Retreat

Getting through conflict is a process with specific steps

There are a range of approaches, with varying degrees of engagement,

Leading through Conflict Retreat

The process foundation we purport is characterized by

The reality is actually NOT a zero sum game

Leading through Conflict Retreat

Innovation def. #1 origination; #2 new idea or method. Conflict can be

We suggest diving in and exploring the conflict to grab the potential to

Leading through Conflict Retreat

Our teaching framework uses Lencionis work, specifically dysfunctions of teams

Lencioni, Patrick 2002, The Five

the table group

Leading through Conflict Retreat

A loss of energy or enthusiasm

Cynicism and mistrust

Listless, unconstructive, and one-sided discussions without candor

Leading through Conflict Retreat

Demonstrative role play by the instructors