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ORIGINAL ESSAY:

This passage is taken from Charles Dickens novel, namely Hard times
published in (1854), precisely: the book second, chapter 12, Down PP 547-
548. The author aimed in this passage to show to the audience, how his
daughters childhood was empty of feelings and emotions, and grew without
sense of life. Consequently, his daughter Louisa felt subvert with the way
chosen by her father to be grown. Also, as a result of her fathers fault, she
confesses to her father that she was sorrowful about marrying a man without
knowing love, and doesnt know how to rectify the situation.

In this passage, it doesn't give a specific location or a time period, so this


isn't initially clear. The mood in this passage is full of pessimism, hatred and
regretted. The characters are Louisa and the father, the plot: the father
raise his daughter with emptiness heart, Louisa grew like a rock without
sense of facts. She got married, but with the absence of love. As a result,
Louisa upbraided her father about the way she was raised with. The type of
conflict, the protagonist Louisa is dynamic; she grows and progress in the
passage when she sighed in the 2nd paragraph:would you have doomed me, at
any time, to the frost and blight that have hardened and spoiled me?, and then
she blamed in the same paragraph: now, hear what I have come to say. He
moved, to support her with his arm in the rest of the passage, she keeps
accusing her father. However, she is interfered with her father who can be
considered as an antagonist, he is regarded for her as a bad person; transform
her from angle to demon.

To conclude, we observe that Charles Dickens succeeded in showing to


the readers the bad result of living with rationality ideology and how this
effected people in transforming them to inhuman persons and do not know
what fancy is that feelings are gifts.
CORRECTED ESSAY:

This passage is taken from Charles Dickens novel, namely Hard times
the novel Hard Times written by Chales Dickens, published in 1854, precisely:
Book the Second, chapter 12, Down PP, 547-548. The author aimed in this
passage to show to the audience, how his daughters childhood was empty of
feelings and emotions, and grew without sense of life. Consequently, his
daughter Louisa felt subverted with the way chosen by her father to raise her.
be grown. Also, as a result of her fathers fault, she confesses to him her father
(to avoid the repetition of the word father) that she was sorrowful about
marrying a man without knowing love, and doesnt that she did not know how
to rectify the situation. (do not switch from past to present, use just one tense,
and use complete forms (write does not instead of doesnt)

In this passage it (do not use two subjects in the same sentence and you
dont need a comma here unless if you say: in this passage, the authors does
not)) doesn't does not give a specific location or a time period, so this is not
initially clear. The mood in this passage is full of pessimism, hatred and
regretted. The characters are Louisa and the father (major or minor? Flat or
round? Protagonist? Antagonist? Complex? Do they symbolize anything?)

(begin a new paragraph when you explain a new idea, and avoid the two
dots, dont write with titles but use introductory sentences) The plot: The plot
of this excerpt begins when the father raises his daughter with emptiness heart
(either say with an empty heart or with emptiness in her heart), Louisa
grew like a rock without sense of facts feelings. She got married, but with the
absence of love. As a result, Louisa upbraided her father (you dont need to
put the word father between inverted commas) about the way in which she
was raised with. The type of conflict, the protagonist Louisa is dynamic; she
grows and progresses in the passage when she sighed in the 2nd second (do not
use numbers, write numbers in letters) paragraph:would you have doomed
me, at any time, to the frost and blight that have hardened and spoiled me?,
and then she blamed in the same paragraph: now, hear what I have come to
say. He moved, to support her with his arm in the rest of the passage, she
keeps accusing her father. However, she is interfered with her father who
can be considered as an antagonist, he is regarded for her as a bad person;
transform her from angle angel to demon. (he did not really transform her into
a demon because she still had kindness in her heart but she didnt know what it
was, you may say he made her into an insensitive person)

To conclude, we (avoid personal pronouns) it is observed that Charles


Dickens (no need to put names in inverted commas) succeeded in showing to
the his readers the bad results of living with rationality, ideology, and how this
affected people in transforming them to inhumane persons creatures and do
not know what fancy is that feelings are gifts (this sentence is unclear).

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