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Abria Flack

Professor Ditch

English 115

27 September 2017

Abnormal Normalities

A life free of standards simply does not exist. As people advance through their lives, they

are constantly overcoming and approaching generalized instruction that must be abided by in the

name of societal declaration. Failure to accommodate these predetermined standards may result

in societal punishment typically dealt verbally, though occasionally physically. The way I

perform gender in certain spaces is determined by the environment and who I am surrounded by,

as is common among most people. Within each space that I encounter, a standard of what is

acceptable in that space is self-determined and attempted to be followed, in response to what

society has labeled as appropriate for my female gender classification.

As a species accustomed to and embodied by societal assertion from birth, the behavioral

tendencies, mannerisms, what or who can prompt interest, and other identity aspects that

construct people, are greatly influenced and set forth by society. In the article, Becoming

Members of Society: The Social Meanings of Gender, the author Aaron Devor mentions how

[American] society demands different gender performances from us and rewards, tolerates, or

punishes us differently for conformity to or digression from, social norms (35). This statement

is often difficult for some people to absorb properly, as it attributes and derides the way of living

that they are most accustomed to; unless addressed directly, gender is perceived as an empty

label, one that merely offers a name in society. Personally, I could not agree more with the
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statement. Though I identify as a female, I favor quite a few masculine tendencies, always have,

and most likely always will. I was never one for nail painting or gossip, but more so for video

games, and sports. However, I would hardly express these qualities of myself because they were

not perceived as lady-like and as a result, I was often confronted with statements and questions

such as Isnt that a boy thing? or Ive never heard of a girl playing video games before.

How feminine or masculine I behave is persuaded by the activities, conversations, or people I

engage with. For example, when speaking on subjects such as beauty preference or cosmetics,

my vernacular and body language fluctuates in a more flamboyant manner, I become more

gesticulative and extensively expressive. However, when speaking on subjects such as sports or

video game releases, I adopt an equally expressive language and manner, though they can be

perceived as more profane.Naturally, in my own space I favor a masculine performance and

activity as it is one that I have owned all my life and am therefore most comfortable with. Due to

the fact, my family would refer to me as a Tomboy, but never in a derogatory manner, and I

accepted the title. But when I truly evaluate the term, it is unnecessary. A label for a girl who

does not necessarily partake or favor feminine activity should not exist. I am a girl, purely, just

one who enjoys masculine activities in particular; I prefer it to be said that way. And although I

have experienced criticism for how I have behaved, my nonconformity was not and is not met

with nearly as much brutality as what is distributed to men who fail to conform to what is

perceived as the ideal masculine image. As opposed to feminine generalizations, the masculine

identity is stripped of the qualities that make them human. Society has determined that men are

not meant to, nor made for, emotional response. However, if that were true, men would not have

been physically born with the ability to do so. Humans are expressive beings that exhibit

constant emotion, making cancellation of emotional expression self-destructive. Nonetheless,

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this is another factor that contributes to the claim that labels the correlation between gender and

biology as invalid.

Due to the response that I received after vocalizing these hobbies, it took years of

concealing what I could potentially be shamed for to bring myself to the understanding of how it

was completely okay. As the years progressed, not only did I establish friendships with females

who had hidden the same interests, but also with people who did not necessarily favor them but

admired them in the unique setting that I offered. Judith Lorber in the article Night to His Day:

The Social Construction of Gender summarizes what my experiences were the product of, by

stating how gendered norms and expectations are enforced through informal sanctions of

gender-inappropriate behavior by peers and by formal punishment (28). If it had not been for

the gender norm that deemed females unlikely or incapable of video gameplay or athleticism, I

would have been confident in expressing those skills from the moment I contracted them.

However, despite the shameless exposure of these qualities that I now evoke, I continue to

exercise them toward male friends, primarily. And not because of embarrassment or unnecessary

caution, but of genuine consideration of interest. That trend resonates through most of my

behavioral tendencies. When around other females, I behave more femininely or in general

correspondence to how they behave. When around males, I behave more masculinely or in

general correspondence to how they behave as well. I believe that this is a result of gender

recognition and perception. Once gender is established and identified, actions and demeanor

commence in response to that specific gender. However, that gender perception is socially

constructed. Men expect women to perform a certain way and women expect men to perform a

certain way, but the way in which both of these identities act exists as standards of depiction,

illustrated by society. These standards generate social stigmas around certain activities and
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determine which gender can pursue them, therefore arousing wideset skepticism among all

people who prefer to prioritize adherence of social criticism, due to the fact.

Similar to awkward encounters where one may not know the name to refer to the other

by, or vice versa, the concept exists within gender identity as well. When people struggle to

recognize, or simply cannot recognize someone by their gender, they experience a

discombobulation that stands as strong as a barrier. This is because everything in American

society coexists with gender identity, therefore, incapability of labeling someone as a specific

gender leads to inability to establish correspondence to general aspects of society and norm,

therefore affecting comfort. In the article Night to His Day: The Social Construction of

Gender, Lorber also mentions how we are uncomfortable until we have successfully placed the

other person in a gender status, otherwise, we feel socially dislocated (20). However, it has not

always been this way. At the very commencement of human existence, society and its influence

on anything-- gender standards specifically-- did not exist; people were just people, equal in their

stances. But, as a result of false accusatory stereotypes and myths, qualities are now assigned and

expected from each gender identity.

Gender truly is a performance that is highly influenced by a plethora of outside forces

social rhythm, chiefly. The concept provides a powerful crutch on general functionality than

most realize. However, with the founding of most recent organizations and programs in regards

to gender identity, American society may soon face a genderless future, free of both positive and

negative standards, therefore placing all personal identities as equal. And in spite of the

essentiality generated around gender identity in American society, the harsh existence of gender-

associated social stigmas, have gradually digressed and will hopefully continue to do so for the
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sake of people like me who want only for their natural, unacceptable behavior and interests to

reside free of label.

Works Cited

Lorber, Judith. "Night to His Day: The Social Construction of Gender." Composing Gender: A

Bedford Spotlight Reader. Boston: Leasa Burton, 2014. 19-34. Web.

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Devor, Aaron. "Becoming Members of Society: The Social Meanings of Gender." Composing

Gender: A Bedford Spotlight Reader. Boston: Leasa Burton, 2014. 35-45. Print.