Escolar Documentos
Profissional Documentos
Cultura Documentos
Alex Stenseth
Professor Fielding
11 February 2018
Strength in Fluidity
Stay at home fathers are the definition of strong. Billy Doidge Kilgore’s article, “The Part
I was Not Prepared for as a Stay at Home Dad” details the emotional impact of breaking gender
stereotypes. Kilgore is an ordained minister who left his job in 2015 in order to care for his son
full time. He blogs on a website called Scarymommy.com, where he has posted about topics
ranging from letters to the family dog to buying an EpiPen. Kilgore broke the stereotype that the
mother is the one who is supposed to leave their job in order to care for their children. He details
the emotional turmoil he encounters due to his decision as well as his wife’s consoling. In his
article, Kilgore utilizes descriptive language, ethos, pathos, and limited logos to mostly
effectively declare his point that rigid gender roles should be more fluid to accommodate modern
society.
In the article “The Part I was Not Prepared for as a Stay at Home Dad,” Kilgore (2016)
explains that society’s rigid gender roles are no longer suitable for today’s current style of
parenting. He first explains that men are specifically supposed to uphold their masculinity, and
their value is determined by productivity outside of the home. He notes that subtle nonverbal
cues in social interaction imply that certain genders should take on certain roles. He also argues
that families should prioritize roles in a way that balances family and work. Men and women are
often forced by sexist power dynamics to take on certain roles. Narrow gender roles are harmful
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towards parents. He explains that because of expectations placed on him by society, his love for
caring his son has turned into a feeling of worthlessness. Kilgore sums up by stating that
traditional gender roles should be relinquished for more modern and fluid roles that are better
Ethos in the article is very powerful in supporting his claim as Kilgore’s experience
accredits his writing. The article’s position on the impact of strict gender roles is valuable
because “as a stay-at-home father, [he sees] the damage done by narrow gender roles” (Kilgore
P13). His experiences provide a strong basis for the entirety of the article. However, the writing
is not only cemented on his opinions alone as “[His] wife openly admits [he is] more suited for
daily childcare. This has little to do with gender and more to do with personality” (P14). This
indicates that his wife supports his views as well. Not only is Kilgore’s credibility accounted for,
his wife’s is also as she did not leave her job to care for her son like women are often urged to
do. Kilgore also recalls his experiences wherein “subtle contempt woven into questions,
comments, assumptions, and body language [undermined his self-worth]” (P9). Examples of his
experiences are important for the persuasive pull of his claim. Since believability is necessary for
persuasion, ethos gives the article insight that makes it believable, and as such, effective.
Emotionally loaded language creates pathos and occurs throughout the entirety of the
article. It also functions as a support for Kilgore's claim. He uses acute imagery to put others in
his shoes, specifically when he details, “Lying awake at early morning hours, these rigid roles
and their narrow view of work eat away at my self-esteem... a looming feeling of worthlessness
circled me and proved hellbent on demeaning my efforts to care for my newborn son” (P7). The
Humanizing emotions makes empathy easy to attain. Sentences like, “I am confused by the
strange reality of performing demanding and difficult work, work I love, yet feeling inferior and
unproductive” (P8), also contain relatable concepts for those who also have children. Seeking out
familiarity with emotion is a strong appeal for an audience that is likely composed of young and
rising parents. Overall, pathos is very successful for promoting Kilgore’s claim as the material he
Logos is less present than ethos and pathos and only somewhat effectively supports his
emotional and experience-driven claims. Arguments like “The rigid gender roles our modern
society can't seem to escape are held in place to ensure traditional masculine identity is not
gender roles” (P11), display logical reasoning as well as a bit of pathos in them due to Kilgore’s
descriptive language. The logic follows through as Kilgore himself is a man and personally
experiences the struggles of society imposing masculinity onto him. At the same time however,
logos in the article is limited by its generalizations. Sentences such as “...men are pressured to
forego parental leave altogether for fear of future punishment” (P12), rely on Kilgore’s
experiences alone and have no outside sources for confirmation. This use of logos assumes that
Kilgore’s experiences are the same of every stay at home father. Logos in the article would be
more effective if it included credible outside sources as well as Kilgore’s personal experiences.
Therefore, the use of logos is ethos driven as it only relies on the credibility of the author.
Kilgore’s article uses a mostly effective balance of descriptive language, ethos, pathos,
and limited logos to support his claim that gender roles should be more fluid to accommodate the
modern family and workforce. In an article based on emotions, it makes sense that the most
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present rhetorical appeal is pathos. Ethos also holds an important role, while logos functions as a
supplement to the emotional experience and how it can be fixed for the better. Kilgore’s use of
rhetorical appeals in his article makes it easier to understand and relate to. For men who are seen
as weak for staying at home to care for their children, this article proves that in reality, they are
strong for pushing through the hardships society places upon them.
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Works Cited
www.scarymommy.com/author/billy-kilgore/.
Kilgore, Billy Doidge. “The Part I was Not Prepared for as a Stay at Home Dad.” The
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/parenting/wp/2016/06/13/the-part-i-was-not-prep
ared-for-as-a-stay-at-home-dad/?utm_term=.035f1664d97f