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Identity and spiritual challenges for the mixed family (English-Japanese)

in the postmodern society of Japan

A hundred years ago, the world population was estimated at 1.5 billion people. Since then, the
global population has increased by nearly five times. The statistics from 2012 revealed that about 7.2 billion
people live on Earth (Population Reference Bureau, 2012), from which 244 millions are international
emigrants, meaning persons who live temporarily or permanently outside their country of origin. They
represent more than 3% of the entire population of the world.
,,In 2015, two out of three international migrants lived in Europe or Asia. Nearly half of all
international migrants worldwide were born in Asia. Among major regions of the world, Northern America
hosts the third largest number of international migrants, followed by Africa, Latin America and the
Caribbean, and Oceania. Between 2000 and 2015, Asia added more international migrants than any other
major region or a total of 26 million additional migrants. In many parts of the world, however, migration
occurs primarily between countries located within the same geographic zone. In 2015, most international
migrants living in Africa, or 87% of the total, originated from another country of the same region. The
equivalent value was 82% for Asia, 66% for Latin America and the Caribbean, and 53% for Europe. In
contrast, a substantial majority of international migrants living in Northern America (98%) and Oceania
(87%) were born in a major region other than the one where they currently reside.” (United Nations
Department of Social and Economic Affairs, 2016).
Other 740 million, or 10% of the world population, are internal emigrants who have moved from
one region to another within the country of origin. For many people who live in countries with average or
small income, the internal mobility, usually from the rural area to the urban clutter, has become an
alternative to immigration (Martin Bell, Hello Muhidin, 2009, p.31).
The economic and demographic situation of Romania has changed significantly after 1989, when,
a first measure taken by the new democratic party of the government was the opening of the borders. Thus,
countries such as Germany, Italy, Spain, America and later England, have become a second home for the
Romanians in their search for a job or prestigious universities. In all of these countries, Romanians have
gathered in communities, forming true identity, cultural and spiritual cores, in resonance with the entire
Romanian ethos.
Such a community is the Romanian community in Japan. Although recent, the community includes
Romanians who manifest their working, cultural or touristic activities in Japan. Founded not long ago, the
Romanian community operates under the auspices of the Romanian Embassy in Japan. Also, together with
the establishment of the community, arrangements were made for the fulfillment of its spiritual needs as
well, by setting up a Representation of the Romanian Orthodox Church in Japan, with its headquarters in
Tokyo.
Generally regarded, the presence of the Romanians in Japan is both the result of a search for better
living conditions acquired through a higher income than in Romania, as well as of a previous attachment
which some have expressed in connection with the Japanese culture and lifestyle.
Japan presents a uniqueness regarding its cultural identity, as well as its policy with the integration
of foreigners in the Japanese boundaries. Statistics show that Japan, not long ago, considered that access to
the Japanese culture and identity, can be understood and approached only in terms of the institutionalized
study, disagreeing with the extension of these cultural limitations by mixed marriages or by owning a
leading position (Kazufumi Manabe, Harumi Befu, 2003, p.127).
Of course, in time, the attitude of the inhabitants of Japan has changed, so that in 2013 the statistics
of the Ministry of Health, Labor and Development showed that 1 of 50 new-born children in the previous
year is hafu (deriving from the English word half which suggest the belonging to the Asian race only
halfway) or with double citizenship, having one of the parents non-Japanese (National Institute of
population and Social Security Research, 2013). At the same time, 3.5% of the marriages performed in
2012 were made between a Japanese citizen and a foreigner, a percentage doubled as compared to the
statistics from 1987, when these marriages totaled only 1.5% (J.T. Quigley, 2013)
Thus, Japan seems to be, at least from statistics, a country open for migration and especially, for
the establishment of mixed families inside it.
The majority of the Romanians living in Japan are females who have been staying here for almost
10 to 15 years and who are married with Japanese husbands and have at least one child. Although the
welfare and the way of life in Japan can be read as a small "paradise", in the depths of the situations, there
are certain existential and identity problems, which each mixed family experiences in a different way.
First challenge which occurs inside this mixed Japanese and Romanian family, is the linguistic
one.
The exact origin of the Japanese language is still uncertain and continues to be the subject of
debates among linguists. While some researchers suggest a connection between the Japanese, Chinese and
Korean languages, others speculate that, as well as the Basque, Japanese is an isolated language. Compared
with other languages, both grammar and pronunciation are extremely complex. But, the most important
feature of the Japanese language is its writing system which is unique for the fact that has not only one, but
two different directions called Kanji and Kana, the latter being subdivided into Hiragana and Katakana,
each with 46 equivalent symbols (Kindachi H., 1991, pp. 30-35).
Thus, not all foreigners, especially Romanians, who are living in Japan, can master with precision
the language of this country, most of them using only the necessary expressed in common and daily
situations.
The linguistic aspect proves its importance by the expression of the profoundness of human
emotions. Not mastering a language within which we develop every moment of our lives makes us, on one
hand, live only the surface of the spiritual and cultural possibilities offered by the receiving country, and
on the other hand, we cannot express our own deeper meanings. In this regard, the family relationships
become standardized at a superficial level.
This is also a cause for a more profound problem that mixed families have to cope with. Thus, not
knowing well the language and not having the possibility of extensive learning of it, Romanian wives
usually speak only Japanese within the framework of their families. This aspect brings out some identity
and social implications.
By doing this, the culture and the identity of one of the parents will be removed from the mixed
family frame. The major effect will be felt particularly by the children. As studies show, it is necessary that
both parents speak at least a part of the language of their life partner, offering the child the opportunity to
learn two languages from young age (Grosjean F.,1982, p.39). In the mixed Romanian-Japanese family,
this process is rather difficult to put in practice, regarding the fact that the majority of Japanese people do
not speak even English, an international language, let alone Romanian, which is very difficult as its
phonetics involve a stressful exercise of pronunciation for the Japanese speaker.
A first cause of this approach of the Romanian wives and mothers to speak only the language of
the Japanese husband, is a social matter. When the child begins to attend kindergarten or school, he is
challenged to speak only Japanese several hours per day, holding back his wish to speak Romanian because
of the xenophobic attitudes of many colleagues. Thus, the mother makes this linguistic compromise for the
child in order for him to learn and deepen the only language which may be used in the society. Of course,
this intention proves to be efficient in the social context of Japan, but being absolutized, it becomes a
regression for the child’s linguistic and cultural capacity.
Studies show that the linguistic development is a complex, dynamic process, influenced by the age
of the child, by the exposure to the speech of a language and to the social interactions. Typically, a bilingual
child follows one of these two types: simultaneously bilingualism, in which the child assimilates two
languages at the same time before the age of 3, and the sequentially bilingualism, in which the child
accumulates a second language after the age of 3, when he has already spoken one until that age (Fierro
Victoria - Cobas, Eugenia Chan, July 2011, p. 80). Also, the preschool children differ from the school
children, in the aspect of the qualitative ability to develop a second language. For teenagers or adults, the
assimilation of a language is rather a conscious then unconscious process, the term indicated for this process
is rather learning, than assimilation. (Kessier C., 1984, pp. 26-54)
Thus, a solution to this challenge could be the natural linguistic expression of both parents within
the family. This can be done without the express exposure of the intention to teach children only a single
language, they having the ability to assimilate without problems both languages (as long as they are spoken
in equal measures).
The language of each nation carries with itself a historical, traditional and cultural inheritance. The
Romanian language, in particular, reflects the Romanian soul in its entire complexity. Therefore, by
eliminating the language from the intimate and educational environment of the family, an identity
disintegration takes place both at individual and family level, its descendants not having the ability to pass
on the cultural and spiritual depth which this language expresses.
Another challenge for the mixed Romanian-Japanese family, which mainly comes from the
Japanese society, is the expression of the emotional relationship of its members.
As studies show, the perception and manifestation of emotions, take the specificity of the cultural
heritage of every person or society. Thus, if the Germanic or American population tend to analyze the
emotions of others by references to the mimics and movements of the mouth, the Japanese recognize the
expression of emotion only by analyzing the sight of eyes. This creates in the Japanese culture a specificity
which makes the character, the feelings and the emotions of a Japanese person difficult to be determined
by another person from different culture. (Takahiko Masuda, 2010)
Actually, in the Japanese society, the public manifestation of emotions is a despised act, being
encouraged the self-control of one`s emotions. This is why Japanese may seem to be cold and distant.
The families formed of Japanese husband and Romanian wife experience particularly, emotional
challenges, deriving from the culture and the way of being of each one of them.
Thus, if in a public space, the expression of emotions is not encouraged, the private area should
include a compensation of expression of all the emotions retained in the outside environment. But, in most
cases, even in the private area, the Japanese do not express their feelings toward their spouse, nor to their
children. A Romanian-English teacher told us an obvious example in this regard. During the English lessons
with pupils from primary school, talking about the child-parent relationship and underlining the need for
affectivity which both have, the teacher encouraged the pupils for obvious action in this direction by
embracing and kissing their mother before going to bed. The children’s reaction was one incomprehensible
to the teacher: they categorically refused this gesture and expressed it like inappropriate.
Likewise, the relationship between husband and wife, especially from the mixed family is suffering
a lot because of the husband`s working schedule.
It seems that the Japanese society is known in the world as being workaholic, one devoted totally
to labor. So, a full-time employee is working in a Japanese company approximately 2000 hours per year,
with 400 hours more than in a French or German company. But, even this statistic is exceeded by most
Japanese, as it is shown by the Labor Statistics from Japan, through overtime hours of work. This statistics
shows that 20% of workers with age between 20-40 years are working up to 60 hours a week, 20 hours
more than the international limit approved. (Kazuya Ogura, 2006). In this context, the family definitely is
neglected. The time that a father can spend with his family is noticeably reduced, especially if we consider
the leisure time which each Japanese man spends during his free time.
To this type of challenge, the mixed Romanian-Japanese families are answering by changing or
adapting their lifestyle. According to a personal analysis of the Romanian community in Japan, at least 3
of 5 Japanese husbands have their weekend free from work, a fact which is certainly influenced by the
Romanian wife, with different mentality and culture from the Japanese. They prefer to come together to
church or to participate with all the members of the family to various events. Even during the working days,
the Japanese husband tries not to stay overtime at work or at a sake with colleagues as it is the custom in
Japan, but hurries to arrive home where the Romanian wife and their children wait for him.
In addition to the challenges mentioned above, an obvious impact upon the unity of the Romanian-
Japanese family is the religion of its members.
If Romanians are in proportion of 86.5% orthodox Christians, the Japanese are in proportion of
54% Shinto and 40.5% Buddhist. (**Facts about Japan)
Thus, although most of the Romanians have not taken into account the religion as a defining factor
when they settled in Japan, in time it proved to be important because of the habits and traditions which are
involved.
Therefore, in 2008, the Romanian community in Japan requested the Romanian Patriarchate the
establishment of a local Orthodox parish. This approach comes as a result of the express manifestation of
many Japanese to convert to Orthodoxy in order to marry a Romanian wife through the orthodox ceremony.
Of course, this is not a problem or a challenge for the mixed family, especially in the context that the
Japanese does not practice their religion (***Religion in Japan). But, the challenge comes for the newborn
orthodox family to live in a Shinto or Buddhist society.
Thus, we have encountered cases in which the Japanese husband, although being orthodox, was still
practicing the Buddhist habits, without having anything to do with the Romanian orthodox traditions. The
gravity of the situation appears in the context when even the Romanian wife, together with her husband,
practices the same habits. This indicates a spiritual and identity challenge for the mixed family. Maybe in
the nowadays syncretism, this cannot be an issue and in case it is, the solution seems to be, for both of them,
the preserving of their inherited religion, mixing the practice according to circumstances and according to
the wish of the spouse.
If for a Japanese husband, orthodox or not, keeping the Shinto tradition represents a powerful
manifestation of his identity (and is hard to change that, even for love), for the Romanian wife changing
her beliefs and traditions represents a big gap in her spiritual identity. This issue may bring her depression,
anxiety or personal disorders, especially when her husband refuses to be a religious person, preventing even
her from manifesting her religion.
The specificity of the Romanian soul is given by the orthodoxy of the Romanian language. These
two aspects (language and Orthodoxy) outline the nature of our identity. We are not able to separate the
language from religion, as well as from culture.
The children of such mixed families, grow without a religious and Romanian perspective of life.
This aspect proves to be particularly important in the context in which, at the age of 22, they are obliged by
law, to choose one of their parents’ nationalities. Until that age, it is assumed that the child learned and
assimilated everything to help him choose and discover his identity. Therefore, the child of the mixed
family in Japan is not allowed to have a mixed identity (by the double citizenship), because the citizenship
is assumed to be a datum not by birth, but only by blood. (The Ministry of Justice, The Nationality
Administration, 2006)
Thus, up to the age of 22 years, the child should be equally provided by both parents with
information and education about the religion in which he was baptized, with knowledge of the languages
that parents are speaking, with the cultural ambivalence of the family and so on.
In conclusion, the modern society in Japan, although upgraded by the excessive use of technology
and by the increase of one`s life quality, firmly preserves features from traditions transmitted on from
ancient times by generation to generation. In the postmodern context, all these inheritances are turning into
real challenges for the contemporary man, in particular for the family as a basic cell of the society.
If the Japanese family does not endeavor to adapt to these considerations, being born and raised
within it, not the same thing can be said about the mixed Romanian-Japanese family. Starting from the
linguistic challenges and reaching to the emotional and religious ones, the mixed family is in a continuous
struggle, both on the inside and the outside, for the establishment of an identity which should not offense
the society within which it lives and must not disown the inner specificity of each of its members.
Of course, not all mixed Romanian-Japanese families experience these challenges at the same level.
We believe that the level of gravity relates to the ability of each member to resonate in harmony with each
other, without disintegrating their identity and without emphasizing the differences, but taking the best
datum of each specific character transformed into a single score?
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